Saga 068 ~B My Age V~

Today is the second worse day of existence, E-Day. The first is the day B died. The third involves “Tifa Lockhart’s dress.” The fourth is starting the Day Job. But let’s focus on today or not. To not have to emerge or exist today being 38. B My Age V

Wednesday, September 7, 2022

Saga 068 ~B My Age V~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, at the age of 38. If that were true, then Happy E-Day. Of course, I’m not.

I should preface this because I’m writing on Sunday, September 4, 2022. You know I don’t want to do a damn thing on E-Day. Except that it vanishes. Hell! I need a break now, Inspector. But if I have any chance to … FUCK survive! The one thing I can’t fail at Inspector Echo. I’ve resigned myself to the fact that I have to do something today. Air conditioning? The money I don’t have to help Virgil be more comfortable. And as for myself? Existence? Inspector, if I wanted to die, I could block my Olds’ numbers. Inevitable what’s coming. It’s only going to get worse. And without Braxton but with Virgil here. I should have thought about that. I’m amazed I rise every day.

Who knows, I might get lucky. We’re still dealing with the real-world Inspector Echo. Now that being said. As I spoke to my Future Wife, what do I want for E-Day, the 38th ha? The song says, “The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had.” Inspector, to DIE. Simple and plain. I wake up on fire anyway, trying to comfort a puppy, don’t I? Speaking of a drooling dog, how about a drooling me? I’ve seen Braxton’s aunt Carolina naked, sure. Or at least her Yabbos. Either way, she won’t say anything about E-Day out of respect or forgetfulness. Then, of course, there’s Cherry and M Anime. Ha-Ha, that’s so funny. Cherry doesn’t know. M Anime… “Not That Kind” of girl.

Ok, that goes for both of them, to be honest. The other girls I know… or could pay for, um? Did I mention I’m right here with the door open to get air and help V with the heat? Yep. No money. But if I work today, I can get out of the house and find a fan or something. Echo, what will I do come the actual day? What about in the future as I do Endure and Survive? I looked up where I was last year. There were 37 things on that list, and not one was finished. Chronicle 068 ~B III The Emergence~. Lying, I did get a new battery. At my age, what have I done? To B My Age V

584 Days Without B III, Day 025 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,

Log 155 ~Is Will “GULP” Gray~

I like that song from Seal, Kiss From A Rose, and I fear I’m going gray, as the morning didn’t lie, or maybe I dreamed it up I am so tired these days, I hope I’m not so old when I find her. Is Will “Gulp” Gray?

Tuesday, November 26, 2019

Log 155 ~Is Will “GULP” Gray~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now like the alphas in most of the books I read. Now here’s a confession for you, I didn’t get into a “specific” genre until I read E.L. James’s works. You know My Love I’m a traditionalist. No Man Cave but The Study. I’m not one for a bunch of lights. If there’s anything “modern” about me, while I still keep paper copies of books, nothing beats a Kindle. So what am I going on about today, well it all started when I looked in the mirror.

I still hate mirrors as if I’m a vampire or something. Back in my day, vampires were scary, not that I have anything against Blade or Twilight. Speaking of fangs, My Dæmon wears his age well, doesn’t he? Any day now, he’s going to spout a beard, or all his hairs will turn to gray.

One more thing that will happen before I ever let you meet my “father.” The Dead don’t walk the Earth, yet. Won’t Indiana Gone be pleased? I told her that there would be WALKERS before I got married. Anyway, I fear if you met my “dad,” I would be dead to you. My mom is great; you could talk to my sister but, my dad? “I didn’t know Tony” had a son” I’ve heard that my entire life. The strange thing is I have listened to worse, that’s why I don’t lie. If I were the “Lord Of War” you would know what I do baby doll. Do I keep personal and business life separate? Of course, we have two-legged children. Still, I even keep my fur-baby somewhat sheltered. However, my point is also Indiana Gone didn’t think my father looked half bad. I’m not the jealous type I mean; the Devil has many colors.

Is that why I like black so much? Okay, that brings me back to the mirror this morning. SIGH, I found gray hairs. Baby girl, I’m an old man. It’s not just that though, between my ear, which I bring up every day and too much light? I don’t wear sweaters, but I’m always in a hoody. I’m figuring out money though we have billions. What about the news? I’m keeping up with everything. Most of the novels I write while fiction are almost biographies.

Still, I’m your old man right; Is Will Gulp Gray.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 186 ~Will Turns To Ink~

All the ink I’ve spilled, there is not a doubt in my mind that I am meant to be a writer and worrying about B III keeps me on point most days and with the money, I have split between them, and here I want to be Reality Kings. Will Turns To Ink.

Thursday, January 3, 2019

Episode 186 ~Will Turns To Ink~


Come In Dirty Diana,
How To Make One Million Dollars, become a pimp, direct pornos, hell even gay for pay if I swung that way, so yeah I guess I understand that, $$$$ wouldn’t be enough for me to sell my body, though I have slightly loose morals… not that much. So baring that I decided to become a writer so I could be whatever I wanted but why wait; I waited too long and missed out on a great girl, there is the fact of “What’s My Age Again,” and dare I call myself INSATIABLE with several different things.

A healthy obsession, as my Motivations would put it; I asked some people what they think I’m obsessed with and without a doubt my son, all the money I have put on him, and he’s even shown up in a story here or there. As for books, my writing was the next thing and how could I not, again that’s what telling a story, writing a poem, talking to you even, it’s bleeding, it’s painful, it’s art, removing the poison from within. Maybe that’s the sin I should have told Inspector Echo because these days the blood has not become ink but different, with time.

Again I hate the holidays, but with the free time I have in abundance, I can’t say I have used it productively as much, my words nonexistent out of my mouth while I watch a beautiful woman moan my name over and over, when is the last time I’ve heard such divinity. My fingers possess the Midas Touch, how much gold is too much to lift them, and then I release those fortunes to see her “treasure box” to watch her skin glow, and how she does shine. My eyes as black as the devil, red from her fire or is it from a lack of sleep which is one more reason I’m not writing my story but instead, directing, producing, and geeking out about it. E.L. James had Christian Grey to write, I wonder how the Marquis de Sade got anything done and Todd Michaels book Begging For It, of course, is damn illegal.

“It’s a wonder that humankind has constructed any kind of civilization with this monumental distraction at hand.” Youth in Revolt

So of course why I have always known it’s possible (with varying degrees of success) living a bit of my story has made me “reluctant” okay downright lazy to write; if I could be like Jadis somewhat, who continued to be the artist but also became the paint. Where have my hands been, if anything I’m wiping the drool from my chin, I’m somewhat surprised I haven’t lost myself in any screen; I’m a cautionary tale of lust maybe because how Will Turns To Ink.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 179 ~Willies Under The Tree~

I wouldn’t make Santa out to be a pimp or a dominant, only the owner of a big corporation so that he doesn’t have to worry about money, with one woman he’s been with forever and some little ones that aren’t his but he cares… “Willies Under The Tree.”

Thursday, December 27, 2018

Episode 179 ~Willies Under The Tree~


Come In Dirty Diana,
How To Make One Million Dollars, Christmas isn’t that expensive; love is priceless, but the present, a gift, that wish, when a girl’s on her knees, when she shuts her eyes, hell when you leave her breathless. God, Daddy, ha my name would be good, but I don’t know many girls who call out to Santa and am I still hoping I’ll end up with some sexy eighteen-year-old vixen one day?

My tastes lately have let’s say matured though I’m not giving up but am I even “trying” at all or maybe I have more sense surprisingly… I didn’t buy any lingerie this Christmas though I’ve tossed around a bit of Erotica. One way or another it’s all about keeping the girl around isn’t it, Baby It’s Cold Outside so yeah it was bras and bikinis one year, books this one, and of course my BDSM lifestyle is all year round. The ideas of ribbons and bows give me a hard-on, and again I like wrapping up a P.Y.T but maybe what’s bothering me today, being dominant is one thing, and if you can love someone, well you can do anything but Santa loves the wives, mothers, and singles too right.

Ho, Ho, Ho indeed, because I want the girl and like any Dom, I want all that she is, now and how many times have you heard me say (from my Motivations) I’m not preaching separatism or isolation, what I desire is to know a woman like no one else. In return, I would give all of myself, and I would want for her to wish for it, be wanton for this, how about being wistful about me. It’s scary to know desire so badly and graver still if not but not from a lack of submission or devotion, instead because there is another life, and as always any man takes care of what; who belongs to him and if his woman values something even more than herself he must in turn value such too.

Newton, Santa, Mother Nature leave something under the tree, gifts to the world and I haven’t heard any complaints yet about mine… other than being a tad bit inappropriate at times. Not today though, this isn’t anywhere near lascivious, this time of the year but what about the rest of this month: sad perhaps this being our last conversation this year, Willies Under The Tree.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 069 ~Well Will Wasn’t Lit~

I’ve never been one for burning books… well except if those books happen to have my name on them, or from a blog here or there but as you can probably see I haven’t been on fire lately anyway. “Well Will Wasn’t Lit”

Saturday, September 8, 2018

Episode 069 ~Well Will Wasn’t Lit~

Hey Lady Lu,
Give Me One Reason other than they burn books at 451 degrees, that we shouldn’t say goodbye to Summer just yet or that I haven’t made a wish on a star forever, so why on Earth would I need candles? This whole week, I’ve expected squad lights, an interrogation room, I’ve seen the sun in the sky and the light reflected on nickels and dimes, cash burning a hole in my pocket, while I’ve watched others lights vanish into Hellfire itself easily.

Can we at least agree that the cops aren’t looking for me? With as many as I’ve seen… probably not without a healthy dose of Electroconvulsive Therapy (yes I looked that up). Maybe one good release but I’m back on NO FAP. Should I get back to writing then and be warmed by my fire… probably not today, a man has to eat and while I would prefer another type of Cherry Pie than what I had on “The Day” well DoorDash is enlightening. Speaking of which I’m sure you’re interested how “The Day” turned out and I would say that I’ve seen the light, but you know how I tend to repeat history and so I didn’t need it to know *sigh* That’s How You Know you f***** up.

Should a person get more responses than the age facing them, that would be thirty-four, besides “Indiana Gone,” “Okay,” my immediate family (that’s three) Pizza Hut, and OKC, nobody knew, seven messages and I made sure the Ranches down in Nevada didn’t know. I didn’t need anyone trying to make a buck off of me, but again DoorDash did, and I regret that because I didn’t want to get off my lazy butt for McDonald’s and I’m out fifteen dollars. “Indiana Gone” did pay me back a lot plus another fifty for “The Day” but all that’s going towards Project Alamo, seriously I’m still Alive, how and why, inquiring minds?

So is there a silver lining other than my beard in the bathroom lights, what about some light at the end of the road, and am I not on the Highway To Hell which is the only light that remains constant in this life? Who knows what I will find in the blaze that seeks to swallow me. In All The Stars which have existed much longer than I can ever remember. But, so you know, Well Will Wasn’t Lit.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 161 ~Hurry Up And Wait~

What are you waiting, she’s not coming to me anytime soon, neither are millions upon millions of dollars or a legion of adoring fans for a book signing as of late. Hurry Up And Wait, NaNoWriMo was last month, and I think I’ve relaxed enough

Saturday, December 9, 2017

Lesson 161 ~Hurry Up And Wait~

Hey Lady Lu,
No Fear, age is nothing but a number but that number is getting bigger and bigger, and you know some people say to think of it as leveling up but what happens when you level up in a video game? How many times have I just wanted this game to end, not that I’m retaking the suicidal route contrary to popular opinion, hell as if that view is worried about me honestly?

Take a few days ago, my general manager is concerned about me, how I felt like I was right back in school; “It’s Times Like These” I find out how rational a person I am. You see he’s more worried about himself and the rest than my mental health, getting over whatever possible affliction I have going on at the moment. You know me, Luna, I have a million excuses, which again shows why I’m so late talking to you another time, today should have been better considering no work.

That’s what I have to get over, work and that means I should be writing more but instead what have I been doing, what’s today’s excuse… Blue Balls. If anything that is what I’ve been waiting for the longest; to take a page from The Matrix Reloaded vis-à-vis love and of course there is still an opinion, my parents, family, dog, friends, etc. Now, of course, you probably think I’m talking about the love of a woman in a happily ever after sort of way but what comes to mind at this particular moment is loving myself. No, I don’t mean the thirty plus minutes I spent in bed thinking about getting an ice pack for my junk for relief.

Hurry up and wait has only been another excuse, leave that to others but not for me, if you want a car you don’t wait for someone to give you one, you get off your ass and work. You want to eat, it’s the same thing, what about being an aspiring novelist and what about falling in love? No, my dear Luna, this is just a reminder that I have to get up and work and stop thinking about tomorrow, there is no tomorrow, live like there’s no tomorrow, oh yeah that has to be a rule without a doubt.

What I have learned today is even if I can’t keep my head up out there… not yet, I shouldn’t have it down here, just looking at my dick, waiting for a release that I can’t give, no more, I won’t Hurry Up and Wait.

I Will Have No Fear

At The Age of Occasional Wellness

What’s my age again, what’s my age again, the dog and I are old men without a doubt and I wonder what his life goals were, better his than mine, because he at least has a chance I suppose? “At The Age of Occasional Wellness”

What big I’s you got?
The better to see no one’s coming
but if you expected nothing…
At any time, you can stop
looking and maybe jot
this down to one more day of succumbing
to your greatest sin, becoming
more “hopeful” in your old age and that’s a lot

Because what big zeros you see
There aren’t a lot, quality over quantity
know your place, keep your place and be
a shoe, and that’s not a big number, but geez
it beats your age and keeps out the laughter of this comedy
Walking away from your curiosity
Zero to hero, there’s the possibility

These words, these words, these words, big and small
might as well be on other planets
or thrown away by the force of habit
Maybe not even written at all
That is why there are so many places to fall
Oops, oh my, ow, tragic
There is no need to can it
I’d say if there were anyone to call

then what’s with all the holes
cause I got enemies, got a lot of enemies
my wishes, dreams, and quite a few deities
better known as girls, when I would rather sell my soul
for any margin of control
of my mental facilities
At the age of thirty-three
It was never a life goal

Only obeying, obtaining, obsessing over, obvious occasions occasionally okay

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.