Tag: Therapy

Lesson 302 ~Never Learned To Wrap~

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They don’t realize how much of an idiot you are until they open it, like my writing and somebody told me once I wear my heart on my sleeve, and of course, nobody wants to see that. Never Learned To Wrap, and I’m terrible at gift giving I suppose

Sunday, April 29, 2018

Lesson 302 ~Never Learned To Wrap~

To Will:
I Am Not Fine Today but “I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday”… no, you would lose what’s left of your mind; how about a birthday, hell no, and Valentine’s everybody knows what they’re getting but you haven’t gotten it on that particular day. They say that it’s better to give than to receive and today you have had a bit of a revelation. That is you have nothing to offer this small world. Seriously are you becoming more depressed or what Will?

Think about it though, rules know creation for a reason, and maybe every person is given one gift and writing isn’t yours; before you say anything, you did complete one of your six impossible things. Anyway, what about the girls that say you have a keen fashion sense, wrapping gifts, e.g., lingerie that some other guy gets to take off of them, that’s not a gift that’s a curse. What about The Simpsons “will somebody please think of the children” yeah introducing a child to Star Wars, really did being a Star Wars fan do me any favors and speaking of favors, six impossible things?

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 43 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Completed (Day 50 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves (Cut The Yard? Find A Pet Groomer)
Completed (Backyard Cut, Two New Groomers Located)
3. I Will Not Trash My New Novel
Completed
4. I Will Complete 50% of VLAD
Completed 77%
5. I Will Post A Review
Completed? Galahad Suns (Today)
6. I Will Finish My Book
Completed

If someone ever asked what’s the best gift you ever gave it would be your presence; and no that doesn’t make you sound conceited, hell look at what you’ve done, the idea that you can even show up for your own life is a miracle. It might be the best thing, and it’s already the worst, but that’s a conversation for Inspector Echo, showing up for a girl, what a test of courage that was. Now that’s a gift you should give yourself, COURAGE, and what men have been known to do in the name of some girl but what about the man in the mirror, next six impossible things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 50 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Edit At Least One More Chapter Of My Novel
4. I Will Complete 100% Of VLAD
5. I Will Post A Review
6. I Will Find Something That Makes Me Courageous

You always find a bit of courage for a few seconds at work, why can’t you hold on to it though, or maybe it’s not so much courage but “Will” and that’s always been the question, holding onto yourself and remember that no Fap rule would you. Maybe that’s the thing, everything you want to give shouldn’t be wrapped or is already, and so you never learned how but what is that thing you have to give at the end?

No you wouldn’t say anything as cheesy as “It’s Only Love” and you’re not that wise, and courage is yours, and never surrender any power and as far as everything else; Never Learned To Wrap.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 301 ~No More Heroes Anymore~

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I’m no hero, but at the same time I don’t want to be just cannon fodder, and for sure I’m not Atlas trying to carry the whole world, but maybe somebody should tell that to my e-mail account or the guy wanting me to donate. No More Heroes Anymore

Saturday, April 28, 2018

Lesson 301 ~No More Heroes Anymore~

Hey Lady Lu,
I Am Not Fine Today, and in other news, I don’t need to be saved either and don’t worry I’m not about to turn all religious on you. Honestly, we wouldn’t have so many heroes if that was the case. Why don’t we ask ourselves why we need so many heroes and I answer, it’s because the world is just one big mess and yet we tell everyone to do their part, but look at all the charities, the programs, the ideology.

Hell you might as well call me a Republican, but then again I didn’t donate to babies when I was at the store today, and sure I didn’t want to but say I did, what about the puppies, what about housing, and there is always disease. There was this man today that called me “rabbi,” seriously I’m not religious, and this guy, just another black guy trying to make it in the world who only wanted to talk, maybe he needed a friend. Don’t get me started on friendship; you know “Cherry” can be draining, people talk about enemies but it’s your friends Lu that take it all, and no I don’t mean like that.

“I got enemies, got a lotta enemies
Got a lotta people tryna drain me of my energy.”
Drake ― Energy

How about the girl I saw today while I was shopping, beautiful and all but I didn’t want to mess up her day; another reason I’m not a hero, I lack courage, and to a villain, it wouldn’t have mattered. You see every person on Earth is their world, trying to save themselves, some find by helping others they indeed accomplish this, but that ain’t everybody though they continue to say that thinking of yourself is selfish. Personally and I’ve said it before, I don’t want to be the hero, and I feel so horrible saying that, I feel selfish, every day we are inundated with cries for help, justice, and those that can try.

“Nothing in the world is the way it oughta be. It’s harsh and cruel, but that’s why there’s us: champions. Doesn’t matter where we come from, what we’ve done or suffered, or even if we make a difference. We live as though the world were as it should be, to show it what it can be. You’re not a part of that yet. I hope you will be.” Deep Down

Maybe I’m just feeling overwhelmed at the moment as again I live “my” life not for myself but others, and when I do rest, I feel like I’ve wasted a day. I do it out of love for my dog, the needs of my job, the fear of my father, and the lives of my friends. The problem with being a hero is they only get to see the bad, and with victory comes no meaning, and at the very least a villain understands what he does, don’t I know.

Villains and tragedy give heroes purpose, and I have enough of the bad, but no matter what I say I only need one hero and that’s me, the rest of the world has plenty fighting to keep it going, so let them be strong, I’ll say No More Heroes Anymore.

“You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain.” The Dark Knight (2008)

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 295 ~Happily Editing After Right~

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Whatever will I do with myself tomorrow… editing sounds so much harder than writing, but now it’s time to start living again maybe; didn’t take me the whole month to finish but decisions, decisions. Happily Editing Ever After

Sunday, April 22, 2018

Lesson 295 ~Happily Editing After Right~

To Will:
I Am Not Fine Today though you might have been once upon a time as they say and this just isn’t a story thing it’s life; you feel like it maybe you’re in a state of Mania if you’re honest. You go from the excitement of being so close to the end of the novel, a little over a thousand words left to go and then a depression over is this honestly how April is passing? How about the fact that your hours at work are down so dramatically but at the same time, there is more time to write, to edit; and how many novels have you gone through, I’m just saying.

What about outside of writing, so many things are coming up “Fear The Walking Dead,” “Into The Badlands,” and “Westworld” I guess you won’t be watching much YouTube for a while except to catch some reactions am I right? I’d say you deserve some time off and think about it if all goes well in May, you could be holding your book, not the novel because that’s not happening but poetry without that dreaded fifty-thousand-word cap? The world will start turning again soon enough, and then you can begin work on these six impossible things right because let’s see hmm:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 36 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Completed (Day 43 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
Partial Completion (Yard’s A Mess, Nails Trimmed But Paw Got Caught In His Collar)
3. I Will Find Out What My Book Is About
Completed
4. I Will Complete 50% of VLAD
Failed
5. I Will Post A Review
Failed
6. I Will Write My Book
Completed (Just Over A Thousand Words The End)

At the moment though you’re hurting, woke up late today trying to work out an ending, the dog wants all the attention you can give him, getting his paw stuck again doesn’t count, it’s time for a new groomer because PetSmart sucks. Today is dull because anything left of creativity has been thrown into your story and even now, getting back to the grindstone sounds exhausting. You’re going to make it though because that is what you do and it’s not even three thousand words today just a thousand one hundred, not a challenge but then again six impossible things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 43 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves (Cut The Yard? Find A Pet Groomer)
3. I Will Not Trash My New Novel
4. I Will Complete 50% of VLAD
5. I Will Post A Review
6. I Will Finish My Book

You honestly need to break the habit of writing out the problem (Novel) and not to seek out the answer (Editing) nobody knows your work nowhere near as you. The day job wants to keep you a “slave to the rhythm,” but this isn’t loving, not sure what it is exactly. All you know is once upon a time there was something else, and it might have been better than this feeling but to find it again you have to discover, Happily Editing After Right?

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 294 ~The Ease of Jealousy~

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So today wasn’t my day and tomorrow I might finally finish another novel; fifty-thousand words, while somebody else will write one sentence and the world will be all a “Twitter” won’t they, am I jealous? The Ease of Jealousy.

Saturday, April 21, 2018

Lesson 294 ~The Ease of Jealousy~

Hey Lady Lu,
I Am Not Fine Today, because I apparently overestimated people’s stupidity or maybe I underestimated the power of my laziness but I’m still working today even though I slacked off a bit yesterday a lot… the dog groomers, the bank, shopping, excuses. How often do I rely on people being terrible at their jobs just to make myself feel better, not that I could do such things, but I have a higher calling; these people sustain life but don’t writers and the other artists make it worth something, a reason Lady Lu.

“And medicine, law, business, engineering, these are noble pursuits and necessary to sustain life. But poetry, beauty, romance, love, these are what we stay alive for.” ― Dead Poets Society

Now it’s one thing to see all these authors, talented, tremendous, gifted, but what are the odds that I’ll meet Skye Warren, that one of my books will have me dancing with Jennifer Lawrence at some soiree, or I’ll end up on the big screen, well porn has awards. It’s when I see people I know; you remember the bitch that got me back into writing because I was so ashamed of myself “Look Who Grossed Up” and that was Two Hundred And Ninety-Four posts ago. I suppose she’s still writing, was even getting contacted by publishers and such and here I am, I’ve been writing most of my life, and okay I’m jealous, secure enough to admit that right?

“Males shouldn’t be jealous that’s a female trait” ― Jay-Z

Anyway, so last night this extreme Christian girl I once worked with has started her blog. I peeked at it, and again those feelings of shame and regret crept up, and I probably won’t often visit just because as the song goes “I don’t ever wanna feel like I did that day.” Isn’t that easy, be respectful to women, but I’ll be jealous too, of her following, of all the likes and fans perhaps? All she will have to do is be herself *sigh*. Now I could argue the other way about being “green” it’s not easy making money, not if you’re me, it’s easy being “a sick pig” or skeeve as you know who called me; if she knew.

One mean word spawned thousands if not millions that were better left going unwritten though, someone told me recently she discovered my work, and it is nice to have a fan, you don’t know how much. It’s not easy getting up and exposing all my secrets, some I suppose, it’s not easy looking at my work and not blaming alcohol or drugs, yeah I’m bad at my craft, and that Lady Lu is what brings *sigh* The Ease of Jealousy.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 288 ~Getting Our Hands Dirty~

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With these two hands I will make me a world, but God took seven days, I think a month will do for me and how many authors did “The Bible” have again, though tonight I’m going to watch other people make a mess. Getting Your Hands Dirty.

Sunday, April 15, 2018

Lesson 288 ~Getting Our Hands Dirty~

To Will:
I Am Not Fine Today, and neither is the dog on account of the rain, missing his outside time amongst other things, but the perfect excuse to stay inside and get your hands dirty don’t you think? You’ve been doing so for days, and certain aspects of your life have been suffering for it, but you’re halfway there; when did everything become about your novel but how about these six impossible things here:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 029 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Completed (Day 036 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
Failed (*Starship Troopers Voice* Bugs)
3. I Will Announce My Book Camp NaNoWriMo
Partial Completion (No Title or Back Cover)
4. I Will Complete 50% of “VLAD.”
Failed
5. I Will Write A Review
Failed
6. I Will “Get Out” Of This House Other Than Shopping Or Movies
Failed

To think once upon a time, you didn’t have to be told to go outside and play, when the girl next door was enough, and you were running away from kisses, or when you would write your poetry with your feet in the lake, ah the embrace of nature. Getting your hands dirty nowadays means what germy mess is on your phone and shall we dive into your files and see all your secrets; there’s no need since you are writing them out every single day in your novel. At least you’re not hugging the toilet throwing up the real trash you are making your body with so much unneeded medication, but what are the six impossible tasks this week:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 36 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Find Out What My Book Is About
4. I Will Complete 50% of VLAD
5. I Will Post A Review
6. I Will Write My Book

It takes blood, sweat, and tears, so maybe your hands aren’t meant to be clean because now is not the time for crying, as tired as you may be, as frustrated, what about anger, I swear the rage continues. People say there is supposed to be some amount of clarity or a burst of energy you know when you stop “Fapping” but when will that kick in or maybe it explains everything that’s going on in your story. I don’t have any words of encouragement, the last thing you need is anything of comfort, might make you fall asleep on the spot, if anything the madness and the hunger endures but today is going to be a good day, Survival Sunday at the movies right?

You’ve never been one for the glass is half full or half empty, no there’s only the glass and the drink, and it’s time to take your medicine, or maybe just figure out what the hell you’re drinking nowadays. In the end isn’t that what matters, but okay we know your heart, your soul, and mind are just one big insane asylum but you’re trying to fix that aren’t you and what about doctors, clean hands but making money you know Getting Your Hands Dirty.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 287 ~Fools and Their Eh~

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Oops, I did it again, wasted my time, did my best instead of going out and maybe doing anything else that might honestly help me I mean any fool can write a book right. “Fools And Their Eh,” which I’d be lucky if I got that at all

Saturday, April 14, 2018

Lesson 287 ~Fools and Their Eh~

Hey Lady Lu,
I Am Not Fine Today, best case scenario I’m meh or eh and keeping an eh is a miracle these days but shouldn’t that be what a smile is for, a laugh, or just an honest day’s work. In this movie once, I think they said any fool could make an “A” but keeping it, maintaining it, that was the hard part, along with making it mean something, anything at all.

Maybe I should be talking to Lady Sophia about this, but my work as of late has been eh than A and I’m struggling as to why I even continue with it, even today I only want to hang on to my position with Camp NaNoWriMo. That’s the only top that I can see these days, that fifty-thousand-word total and what does it matter when you’re standing on a mountain of crap? Am I depressed you ask, if I am, I’m bleeding all over the pages which is a good sign don’t you think so Luna?

A which leads to B and I wind up with C, so on and so forth and even if I make it to Z, I would always be looking for the value of X, and I’m as lost now as I was back in those math classes of yesteryear. So what am I trying to say, what do I want to say, and like at work what should I say and that is something I can’t cater to, not anymore, never again though we both know if my “father” walked in here… People must have their A’s no doubt, it gives you value in this world, but no one ever understood I was trying to hang on to that eh most days and what did that get me, I’m Fonzie.

Am I saying I’m cool, am I still speaking of miracles, no I’m saying I get laughed at, I’m believing at some magic time what I am will be acceptable… maybe if we ever get “The First Purge.” Most days, speaking the truth I would like to feel a little bit better than this but I want to write those A’s and dot my I’s and cross my T’s and in the end, doesn’t this make me a fool honestly.

Can I live like this, can I maintain, endure and survive, what is it they say, Fools And Their Eh?

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 281 ~Flat Of Your Back~

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I went to work today but not the day job, but some real work that I’m missing “WrestleMania” for so the question becomes am I having fun yet, can I go and lie down now that the hard part is over. “Flat Of Your Back,” not again I don’t think

Sunday, April 08, 2018

Lesson 281 ~Flat Of Your Back~

“Next time, you will look up at me from the flat of your back.” ― from A Knight’s Tale (2001)

To Will:
I Am Not Fine Today and in case you haven’t learned this by now “let me sleep on it” as the song goes isn’t truly helping anyone, well not you at least and maybe your bed is telling you something. Just another reason you can’t spend all day on your back, remember that brief bit of time when you wanted to build that dungeon of yours, “The Black Room” hell your bedroom has become one posh prison cell.

Now as they say, to everything there is a season; if you recall the reason you started sleeping on your back was just an acknowledgment of the work day tomorrow, ready to be “up and at ’em” but you’re no hero, wage slave. Speaking of old sayings how about “I’ll sleep when I’m dead,” you’re trying to be free of the mask, but you’re still pretending, still hoping that you won’t have to wake up tomorrow, the bed has taken a tomb’s form. Wouldn’t that explain a lot, like sleeping on bricks or stones which means your back should know what it’s like being against the wall? How about it’s difficult to use a laptop on your back though it keeps the “Fapping” to a minimum and how about those six impossible things you have:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 022 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Completed (Day 029 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
Completed
3. I Will Not “Beg,” ”Cherry or Okay”
Partial Completion, Flirting (Cherry’s Lifestyle and Okay’s Tight Behind)
4. I Will Complete 50% of “VLAD.”
Failed 30%
5. I Will Start My New Book Today
Completed
6. I Will “Get Out” Of This House Other Than Shopping
Partial Completion (“The Miracle Season” and “A Quiet Place”) two movie visits

You want to be on your back, and I can’t blame you, the world is a hard place, but you can make it less of one if you get off your back now and do the work. If lust is the key to everything then your bed, no your beds because you’re going to have The Black Room one day have to be comfortable and bouncy, don’t forget bouncy. You do enjoy when girls know how to ride if you’re interpreting “Pony” right, but that’s just one more reason to be on the flat of your back but what girls have been around here lately? What about being on the beach someday just resting, didn’t you get eight hours last night in bed, another excuse to want more sleep but you can’t write your six impossible things from the flat of your back you know?

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 029 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Announce My Book Camp NaNoWriMo
4. I Will Complete 50% of “VLAD.”
5. I Will Write A Review
6. I Will “Get Out” Of This House Other Than Shopping Or Movies

If you want to lie down you should at least make it comfortable right and have some company that isn’t shedding 24/7, the dog’s hair does not know what to do in this weather but if it’s going to be cold, you should work. Will if it’s hot you should be sweating on your keyboard, not lying in bed on the Flat Of Your Back.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 280 ~I Missed Health Class~

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When was the last time I wanted to get out of bed, not needed, not have to, not a challenge, no I only wanted to get up and live… is it too early for Christmas and can I be a kid again and go back to school. I Missed Health Class.

Saturday, April 7, 2018

Lesson 280 ~I Missed Health Class~

Hey Lady Luna,
I Am Not Fine Today because I missed health class, not all of it but probably more than Sex Ed, only this is America, so most kids missed that conversation, to be honest. What I mean there are plenty of things about health that I should have learned being an African-American and all. Personally, I never dreamed I’d get out of my teens and with diet, a brain only a zombie could love, the cops, let’s say things aren’t looking that good.

You may be wondering what brought all this up; maybe it’s the fact that I have wasted yet one more day of my life in bed. Except for walking my dog and nature’s call, I’ve been down for the count. What honestly baffles me is the concept that I have held my day job for almost seven years and in all that time, I’ve been late once, and I’ve called out once, been too sick to stay one time, and left early maybe twice. One of those times was for another job, and the other was for my writing career, and yet I’m not writing today, am I Lady Lu?

I wasn’t learning how to survive on Pop-Tarts and toast, maybe pizza and Rotisserie Chicken every night, am I complaining about food and money right now? Lady Lu they don’t talk about when you’re so depressed that your body follows suit and you’re weighed down by something as light as a blanket. How about cold, the weather has been like something out of “1408” hot, wet, frozen, wasteland but every work day I go out into that, and it’s killing me, but I have a billion excuses as to why I can’t do for me.

Speaking of killing, I haven’t had a run-in with the law for the longest time but from searching on Motherless.com to my Pinterest boards being knocked out, to Facebook collecting intel I could face arrest for a great many things. Am I still hung up on the Pinterest thing… tell that to the hundred or so episodes of General Hospital I have yet to watch and just might give up.

Health Class wants to teach you to stay strong and not just lie on your back which goes right back into how come there’s no sexual education at most schools. I’ll tell you what I haven’t learned today, how to deal with an ever-growing weakness pervading my body but hey Lu I Missed Health Class.

“There is only one rule that binds all people. One governing principle that defines every relationship on God’s green earth: The weak are meat, and the strong do eat.” Dr. Henry Goose, Cloud Atlas (2012)

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 274 ~Truest Sentence You Know~

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A start but life gets in the way or in keeping one promise I might have to break another and that doesn’t sound right at all, just like over three thousand words isn’t the same as five thousand and what about tomorrow. “Truest Sentence You Know”

Sunday, April 1, 2018

Lesson 274 ~Truest Sentence You Know~

To Will:
I Am Not Fine Today will not do, even if it is the “truest” sentence for the moment and indeed that is no way to start a novel, no way to start a life, and both need to start today, right now. Again you are starting late today but if yesterday I could pull off five thousand words you can do the same thing and “Indiana Gone” has faith in you but talk about trust being sorely misplaced.

“Faith,” I wonder did they know that the Bible would take off the way it did; I suppose that’s more of a question for Lady Sophia. Hell, today should be all about Jesus, watching more “Far Cry 5,” do you remember the days of watching “The Ten Commandments” with the family. Talk about being greatly written but more importantly are your stories, maybe we should start thinking of them as goals that you wish to create and for those you will need more than a pen and a pad as Dr. Dre put it. Only isn’t that how it begins, with a pen and a pad, to nickels and dimes, to more paper and speaking of paper how about those six impossible things written down:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 015 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Completed (Day 022 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
Completed
3. I Will Survive Inventory Tomorrow
Completed
4. I Will Finish Reading “Galahad Suns”
Completed
5. I Will Review Pacific Rim: Uprising
Completed
6. I Will “Get Out” Of This House Once
Completed

Now I feel like you should try harder, though it came down to the wire, I just finished writing the Pacific Rim: Uprising review yesterday and posting it, and I drove to Starbucks through a storm, and I didn’t have to, a test of courage. Isn’t writing something you know is going to suck a test of courage, you should probably think up a rule to stop putting yourself down if one does not already exist. That right there is the thing, you know the story that you WILL start today all that you need now is to get it out of you and stop making up a million excuses.

To be honest, though I know you’re at a lost for the next six impossible things though I can think of three right off the bat; another great story, The Walking Dead though I’ll share my disdain for Scott Gimple as well. Speaking of writers, I even did “Cherry” a solid reviewing her work, but it always comes back to me and now you, too busy trying to understand other people’s work what about yours, let’s start six impossible things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 022 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Not “Beg,” ”Cherry or Okay”
4. I Will Complete 50% of “VLAD”
5. I Will Start My New Book Today
6. I Will “Get Out” Of This House Other Than Shopping

So you know what you have to do, the ideas are already beginning to flow all you need do now is write them out, find the Truest Sentence You Know.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 273 ~Tell Me A Story~

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Today has been one productive day, I didn’t tell a story but a few reviews down and tomorrow the real work begins, and that’s when I will have to live up to these words, this promise I suppose. Tell Me A Story, soon and not soon enough

Saturday, March 31, 2018

Lesson 273 ~Tell Me A Story~

Hey Lady Lu,
I Am Not Fine Today but I prefer you not tell me a joke now and especially not tomorrow, and maybe it’s fate that I start writing my next novel tomorrow as the Christians will be all joy and rapture at what they say is “The Greatest Story Ever Told.” Hell how many people go to bed at night hoping that they never have to wake up, even Jesus didn’t make it through his thirties just saying.

Tell me an excuse and yes I’m going on and on about the Pinterest thing; the Internet is sort of like my medication, and I need the right balance of things to keep me centered if that makes any sense. I think I’m starting to understand the rage and the fear of the sound of silence, shouldn’t I know by now no one’s listening to me; it’s one thing when you see your world and they can’t but when your world hides from you… Losing an account has only happened once with Yahoo, but what have I said about defending your one inch of nothing?

Tell me is that why I write about sex all the time, I’m sure many would agree or was I the only one who found the one-inch thing dirty, like Big Ten Inch, or twelve steps. Honestly, I’m not in the mood. It doesn’t matter if I’m in the mood or not because tomorrow I will be writing, yes I need to repeat those words over and over, make them my mantra but it’s like I’m just hitting a brick wall. Hard as a rock honestly, I know, I’ll stop it, but I’m in a rush for no particular reason other than my made-up time constraints, and maybe I should turn my phone off, maybe?

Tell me something good, but before that, I’ll probably be stuck saying something stupid like I love you… what I tell the dog I love him every day, and I reveal to that girl “Cherry” other things, but I’m getting better with that. Today I should be yelling to the masses *crickets chirping*, *tumbleweed blows through*, okay I should ask myself how I feel about movies and books on the blog, writing something Lady Lu.

Tell me it’s been five thousand words already but no, I got a late start today which means I’ll be missing even more sleep but if I could sleep I’d say Tell Me A Story.

I Will Have No Fear