Log 336 ~Fear Plus Hope Equals Courage~

Last week I said I barely notice the Coronavirus (COVID-19) anymore, and I’m not alone in that. Besides all the fears that come with being a black man in this country. I have to find the courage to even get out of bed. “Fear Plus Hope Equals Courage”

Monday, June 1, 2020

Log 336 ~Fear Plus Hope Equals Courage~

Hundred And Thirty-Ninth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now… yep along with saying I’m hopeful. I’m sorry to say Madam Justice; all I have is the fear. Oh, and the lusts, I can’t forget about that. As the song goes, it takes two, but what do you get when you add terror and horniness? Isaku, Dark Shell, The Harvest Night? I would advise you not to look those up. So why even say their names, you ask me? Allow me this small luxury, it’s taking everything not to look at them myself, amongst other things. Tip of the iceberg I tell you but back to business.

I tell you every now and again, I am not a man of faith. At this moment, however, as the song goes. Please allow me to improvise, I’m a man of God with no need for saving. Hell, that’s the very first thing, especially with the current news, to live as I will, no allowance. From a concept to a prayer. For this week, I pray for courage not only for myself but for my son. He has faith I will return. You can even call it, hope when I tell him so. Through I shared fear sadly of the world beyond these walls, we combine our strength to survive. Madam Justice, I fear this entire week though, so wherein lies my hope. Dare I dream of my Six Impossible Things? Lies aren’t they, each and every week. I don’t hope I have good days. No, I fear that day when I’ll get myself fired.

So again, I’m looking for courage. Fear Plus Hope, but how about Purpose And Why. Here’s another song for you, Joy And Pain, as my aunt taught me? Here and now Madam Justice I am afraid, but I’m telling myself I will be better. Like at the Day Job last week, how I got birds slamming into the door now. How about the fact that my “father” is coming over? Fear can serve as great motivation, but it’s running with no destination, and your legs give, and you end up like me. Yeah, lying in bed, hoping that you won’t have to wake up tomorrow. What do I hope for, though, and that’s pretty damn easy to answer ahem WOMEN.

My purpose, but why? When can I tell the world that, to be that brave? Fear Plus Hope Equals Courage.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 334 ~Will The Track Star~

Didn’t I say don’t ask me about the Day Job? I asked the question, what would happen if I stood up? The answer, have a Panic Attack and run out the door. Is that what I’m calling it now, thank you WebMD because it beats cowardice. Will The Track Star

Saturday, May 30, 2020

Log 334 ~Will The Track Star~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but how much is Usain Bolt making? I suppose I chose the right profession if I became the next J.K. Rowling snickers. How about E.L. James, Stephen King, Tillie Cole, or my latest “obsession” Eric Vall? Well, did I even write to Lady Sophia all that happened at the Day Job on Tuesday? Let’s see if I can DUMB it down. On Tuesday the 26th, I asked the General Manager what I should do? She told me to process Amazon Returns. Ten minutes later, I had a Panic Attack and left.

What did we say about checking WebMD? Hell, what did we decide on making excuses? The biggest question is, what am I going to do with my life? As the song goes, I can’t live my life this way. What, in fear, am I afraid? How come I’m scared so GODDAM ALWAYS! Pardon the language Lady Luna, but this isn’t like The Eve of a Cherry. Not like I kept track of all the F-Bombs in that. Speaking of which, it’s Cherry’s Birthday on the 28th. Only did I mention her in any conversations before this one. Happy Birthday, Cherry. There’s so much to keep track of, My Lady. That’s how I was feeling Tuesday. My emotions were shot to Hell besides my fear and my anger. It was like being back in school, and the two bullies have my cap throwing it between them. Yeah, so I like hoodies.

So how do I feel right now? Why don’t you tell me, Lady Luna, how one schedules a mental breakdown? Do I talk about today, being Wednesday? The rest of the week, or what should be Saturday? Now my stomach’s in knots, the week hopefully employed, Saturday angry. No wonder I’m so tired? During the day, I’m running, from my father, from the Day Job, and even my bed. Of course, I’m sitting here right now talking to you. You could say I’m living the dream, beautiful girl in my bed, conversation, a good song. Dreaming… I have to fill my head with everything from well all the above. Money, writers I’ve read, excuses, music, Jeff Daniels, birthdays, Bobby Hill, more. I track everything because, in my real life, we’re just Dancing In The Dark.

Or running my Lady Luna, wouldn’t you say. Tired, Scared of Will The Track Star.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 332 ~Breast To Come Will~

I’m a simple kinda man but maybe not as the song goes, because do you know what I want more than bucks, bullion, and bottled water though that might be making a come back if things get better. “Breast To Come Will.”

Thursday, May 28, 2020

Log 332 ~Breast To Come Will~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but that doesn’t mean I’m paying for anyone’s boob job. Not even Dennis Hof was that generous. As much as I respect the man, I don’t know whether to believe him or Cami Parker, but I’m not giving a book review. Well, maybe a bit on Succubus Lord but not really. You see, I’m one of those people that believe everything happens for a reason. I can’t tell you why I’m into brunettes or the baby doll look of “The Innocence Of Youth,” “Daddy’s Little Doll.” There’s something about BREASTS.

Well more the lack of Tits, Jugs, Knockers. Cans, Dirty Mom Tits, etc. Only this morning, I was bringing up girls with zero to minor boobs. Isn’t it ironic that a girl with huge melons makes me dream of girls with none? Don’t ask me what it is. I mean simply put I’ve always liked Rebecca, Anaa/Alissa, Niquee, and Eileen’s bodies. Remind me, with all my billions to take a trip to Russia. I hate Trump, know nothing about Putin, but I love Yabbos of all shapes and sizes. My son is the same way, four legs and all. I even had to have a talk with him. To keep him off Indiana Gone’s pair at one point. I miss Karlee Grey’s as well. Though being honest, I let my Onlyfans lapse without a second thought. It’s the breasts I almost see or never; I miss the most. Cherry can tell you something about that.

Is that why I’m all into Call me a Legend. I know Dirty Diana. I’m still playing that knowing I’ll never see tits, virtual or otherwise still. It’s like a nicotine patch for smokers. The game gives me something else to do besides salivate. You don’t know how HARD it is to write about one of my favorite subjects in the world. Something so soft and then when you get to have fun with them. Anyway, as the song goes ahem, Diamonds and guns, DIAMONDS And GUNS as Call me a Legend has plenty of.

Only you know I’ll never quit huge Dirty Pillows. Yes, I want to fuck Carrie too, Chloë Grace Moretz edition. Her’s aren’t huge, but Boobalicious/Milk Junkie, whoa Mama. Here I thought I’d mention more Succubus Lord. Succubi, Superbia, Libidine, and Cupiditas. Boobies everywhere Dirty Diana the Breast To Come Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 331 ~The Writes Of Will~

I keep telling myself that writing is going to save me. One of my books, perhaps? Maybe someone will finally discover my blog and not think of me as a psychopath. For now, it’s a note by the time clock. The Writes Of Will

Wednesday, May 27, 2020

Log 331 ~The Writes Of Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and lie or not, I don’t want to be right now; lying. I mean, I don’t want to be jealous, flushed with cash, or sick. If you’re wishing for a goodnight’s sleep Inspector Echo, don’t check your Day Job before bed. I swear my “best” writing never happens at night. Now I know this is Lady Sophia’s calling. Only in a month or so, I’ll be celebrating my return to writing aka Lesson 001 ~Look Who Grossed Up~. I haven’t thought about that “Basic Bitch” in forever but as Herger the Joyous in The 13th Warrior:

“It’s all right, little brother… there are more!” ― Herger the Joyous, The 13th Warrior

More women… you have no idea how difficult it was not to use another “W.” Indeed, more words, more wickedness. So why didn’t I, you ask. Well, I know my Bible, Miss. I’m a man of God without a savior, as a particular song alluded to. I still pray for my son every day. Speaking of words that remind me, revile me or give me regrets, what is it about a “concept” like DAY? I knew a girl named “Day.” How I still love Rainey Summer Day, from The Five by Lily White. Only it’s like my addiction asks, “what will we do today?” After Class Lesson, Anna Vlasova/Alissa, and Eileen Kelly, aka Dawn Lora McKay in The Eve of a Cherry. Oh yeah, what about my novel? Am I ashamed that I use girls I know in my writing? Upset, I killed off, “Dawnie?” That Cherry inspired it, and I haven’t spoken to her?

“For a day in thy courts is better than a thousand. I had rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God, than to dwell in the tents of wickedness.” Psalm 84:10, the Bible

All I write about, I lose. The Law of Attraction being what it is, I should watch my tongue. Hell, I should watch my time considering the Day Job. One more piece of writing I have to do. Home and Kids, Shoes, my schedule, I only have two write one word. NO, or as the song goes, Hell Naw! Isn’t that what I always say when it comes to writing book reviews? I’ve only realized now I said I love Rainey and the book in general. What about Raphael and Succubus Lord? I am ashamed of the things that I’m not writing today. Inspector Echo, I am SORRY that I ruined my night. Forgive me for now hating the Basic Bitch. I apologize for my views on women and not doing better for my son.

Defending The Writes Of Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 327 ~A Will Too Far~

Last week I said I’m no good without a nap, and this week, I’m still angry, horny, and please don’t ask me about the Day Job, yeah I torture myself enough with that, and if I ever stood up? A Will Too Far.

Saturday, May 23, 2020

Log 327 ~A Will Too Far~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and some people would say that’s way too much. There’s no such thing as too much money, which is why MY country is the way it is. Now I don’t want to get super political with you. It seems that my nap didn’t help, but does it ever? What I’m getting at is, I have such grand dreams (when I’m not sleeping). Considering what I want to do with MY life, I take heat for the smallest things. So since I won’t give you the speech to my boss, let’s go over a few other things.

Yes, I still hate being a liar, but let’s start with my Day Job. AHEM I did not survive this “poop” to be treated like I’m stupid. I might yell at the next huddle at the lot of them. Hell, if it hadn’t been for that one lady asking about my kid, I would say, I hate all of them. So what about my kid? I know he must be sick of his old man spending all his time writing. I still love him like pancakes, but here he is sleeping, knowing it counts as quality time. He loves his walks and wishes they were longer. I hear him often enough. Now that explains why I got the worst night’s sleep. I swear my bed at this point might as well be a trash heap. A fly was making the rounds all night buzzing. I thought there was a beehive above me. Wouldn’t that be awesome, and no “honey” to show for it, makes sense.

Now on women, today’s the first day of NO FAP, again. 1 day, 5 hr, 14 min, 30 sec to be precise. I saw Lisa Peachy right after napping, so I hopped out of bed. There are reasons I can’t do Brainbuddy or Covenant Eyes. My wheelhouse, my writing, their writing. Lady Luna too much information, am I right? Nobody knows me, though, and the ones that ask. Well, they stop talking to me. Even here, I put up a Spotify link, but as the song goes, I gotta enemies. It’s like I’m behind bars in one sense or another. I’m trying to keep the Beast in, keep the Boy out, and end up being a Bastard, pardon my French.

Freedom Lady Lu, now that is A Will Too Far.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 325 ~The Way Up Will~

As Aerosmith once put it, “Love in an Elevator,” now that’s something to put on a “certain” list though I’m sure my collection has a few examples of it. If I want it to happen, though, I should get a few other things up first. “The Way Up Will.”

Thursday, May 21, 2020

Log 325 ~The Way Up Will~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and even more if I start thinking with the big head instead of the little one. Well, I’m here, aren’t I? It’s Sunday, and I’ve traveled four days into the future. Yes, I hate the Day Job, my dick is up more often than me, but damn there’s always boobs.

Boobalicious/Milk Junkies, what I would give to be so creative, to touch, to feel. No Dirty Diana, the name of the game these days is profit. Hell, I’ve been all over Onlyfans these days, but I only talk to boobs I “know.” I’m still on the concept that a woman has to aim higher with me. My brain, the beat of my heart, someone who makes me want to surrender my bucks. Speaking of which, if I wasn’t so busy trying to sell books, I would want to review hentai. Wasn’t I talking about going all body-wise myself when it came to Onlyfans last week? The things a lack of Fapping leads to, but again being Sunday, I’m still going strong at eleven days. I didn’t even break out my Fleshlight yesterday. You know I get all into sex toys and “stranger” fetishes of mine.

Now I don’t mean the “Boobless Wonder” Anna Vlasova, aka Alissa or Rebecca from MarvelCharm. It doesn’t bother me at all, only you know that I can name other models, of course. I’ve even gone back to MILF Dos a time or two, and you know she has an impressive set. She’s a good girl, a good woman I should say and wasn’t I talking about holy women and kimonos last week. So what gets me higher than that Dirty Diana or more to the point who. The mind reels.

Some time ago it was trains and buses and now Love in an Elevator. Kininaru Kimochi 1-3 but the fourth one? I guess someone got bored, but I will never get tired of TITS. I could sit here today for hours telling you every single movie. From “Debbie Does Dallas” to the Discipline series. Using sex to make money is not a hard concept… okay, I did not just say that Dirty Diana. My point is even Think and Grow Rich, talks about harnessing the sex instinct. On top of doing what you love, motivations.

So where am I going, what’s The Way Up Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 324 ~Will’s Embarrassing Wily Whims~

Maybe I won’t be able to find something for a customer. It could be wearing my bandanna as a mask because I was so late to the party, not fearing the apocalypse. Hell, it might be this conversation. Will’s Embarrassing Wily Whims.

Wednesday, May 20, 2020

Log 324 ~Will’s Embarrassing Wily Whims~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but I am finding it hard to stay positive. Hell, I have another book idea? If I were to write down everything that humiliates, embarrasses, and shames me, SIGH. Now that would be over Fifty-Thousand words. Today I don’t intend to go so far, but the Day Job is calling, so I’ll be in no mood to write. You know Inspector Echo, I would make a “decent” masochist, seeing as how I want the pain. Oh, and sex isn’t something I’m ashamed of, for the most part, at least, um yeah?

Anyway took a look at my schedule for the Day Job, I’m expecting “humiliations galore.” Of course, I know I don’t have to. I could walk in, and my temperature could spike over 100° F.

I’m not sick but angry, expecting embarrassment, hiding my real work. Speaking of which while my real life sucks. Yes, I said it, SUCKS, another one of my most hated words. Only because people took it from me, you know. Back to my point, what about The Eve of a Cherry or GULP? I let people read my stories and what happens, hmm. Dead in the Water as the song goes, which should cool me off. Yes, I like Ellie Goulding and Abba. I have a dedicated playlist that sings of my shame. Not Ellie Goulding but others. Yesterday though, I was reading over GULP… well, damn you Grammarly app.

Will’s Hated Words:

  1. Skeevy
  2. Stupid
  3. Merge
  4. Happy
  5. Family-Friendly
  6. Just Kidding
  7. Tease
  8. Freak
  9. Lazy
  10. Sucks

It’s my fault too, though, for wasting so much time. Here it is May, and I should have long ago published. No, today I got so caught up thinking about the Day Job I had to take a nap. Now my whole schedule is thrown off. Showering at the whims of My Dæmon. Using him as an excuse, yeah, I should be ashamed. What about the new game I’m playing? Yes, Inspector Echo, I’m still all about Call me a Legend. Life imitating art, living in the plague era, chasing the girlies, and I’m not the best father I can be. How about being a friend? I’ve barely talked to Indiana Gone. I don’t know what M Anime is up to. Well, I did hear from Whisper Girl, and what about Cherry, yeah my novel.

I’m sorry, Inspector Echo, for expecting the worst. For sometimes even rooting for the Coronavirus. Living Will’s Embarrassing Wily Whims.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 320 ~The “Way Out” Will~

I and no good without my nap, but I have worse crimes, of course, and here I am plotting some sort of way out, or at least I hope so. How much is it going to cost me though $45 or more, hmm? The “Way Out” Will.

Saturday, May 16, 2020

Log 320 ~The “Way Out” Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but how? Now you know how I hate sounding like the President. There are plenty of ways I would like this period in history to end though I lack the “liberty” to share them. Besides, we should talk about me and How’s It Going To End?

Should we talk about Thursday, seeing as how it’s Wednesday now? You’re seeing this as Saturday, though. The wonders of Time-Travel. Chances are I ain’t no fortunate son. Yeah, still at the Day Job and next week; there’s no end looks like. When’s the last time I finished a video game? Far Cry 5, NOPE, Heavy Rain, negative, Call me a Legend, are you serious with my little virtual harem? I know Lady Luna, but what was I doing in the shower? I see all my secrets coming to light, losing the social life that I do have, or being oh so sorry. Again there might not be an end, only repeating everything over and over. I’m sorry if I sound down, but this is what happens when I don’t get my afternoon nap. You know I still hate waking up early, and for what?

If there is an end, I hope it’s not like my books, me breaking, or a bunch of lost bucks. The emptiness Lady Luna, that’s the only way I can describe it. It feels so good, but then there’s only okay, and what do I have to show for it. 50,000 words, a clear mind for a few hours, or making some pretty girl happy. That’s what I have been sitting here contemplating. $45 to become a Patron. I only now got the Day Job back, and today I want to spend money, quick escape.

No Lady Lu, I’m talking to you because as the song goes, I’m Gonna Be Somebody. Funny, I use the song from Police Academy, and how often do I break the law? Yeah, I’m not behind bars… been there done that when I was in juvenile detention. It’s not like Coronavirus (COVID-19) did a number on me. Other than a bunch of new rules, and yes, I’m still mad at Academy Sports + Outdoors. I don’t let go of anything, right? My way out is with Bucks, Babes, and let’s say Biology for now, hmm?

So how to obtain those things, The “Way Out” Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 318 ~Howling, Hot Here’s Willy~

As the “Fresh Prince” once said, “Hurt Me, Hurt Me,” though I’m more a sadist, to be honest, it’s just the way I get all “warm and tingly,” or how I’m buying my ticket to Hell perhaps. Howling, Hot Here’s Willy

Thursday, May 14, 2020

Log 318 ~Howling, Hot Here’s Willy~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I must be a HOT commodity. Again this is going to be one of those conversations. Brought to you by the letter H. I will also yet again blame Girlfriend Reviews. Should Your Boyfriend Play Nier: Automata? Yeah, seeing as I feel some kind of way towards 2B and Commander White. Not that I have much time to play video games, and I’m on day six of NO FAP. Which leads me into today and what is getting me hot, besides liking alliteration.

HUMILIATION, how many times must we talk about it? I don’t know as long as I like the real stories from some women. You know the language that I always prefer the whole word “Whore” in comparison to “HO.” Loving the way a girl moans and groans it, her cries. HOWLING, and no, I don’t mean like a wolf. For a man like me who enjoys getting his cock sucked, I like loud girls. No, not that kind of loud if you know what I mean. Bedroom noise, not waste my time gibberish. For a girl to choose you, over-breathing, blowjobs, or my name. HOLY, a divine experience. I do enjoy good girls, no doubt, and between maids and nuns. For some reason, I’ve gotten it into my head that kimonos are holy, but I know they were usual. Between Kurenai, Fuu, this Mob/Mafia game I played on Facebook, and others well cue Homer Drool.

HEAVY, not in the slightest, but what about the likes of Momokun who showed off her ta-tas? I won’t lie, I’m still hoping to see Cherry’s, but I haven’t asked in quite a while. As skinny as I am Dirty Diana, where do I get off? On BBWs, but not today, keep it in my pants. HOPING though to be a father someday. Is pregnancy sexy? There was this girl I wanted to date that got knocked up. Watching wrestling last night, Becky Lynch, announced she’s pregnant. In The Eve of a Cherry, one of my characters was expecting. Beautiful MILFS. HOT yet, Dirty Diana? Time marches on, and the things that get me going damn me to Hell ever more so. I was at the Day Job, and my temperature climbed; I’m not sick.

Well, at least not with the Coronavirus but my pending desires, Howling, Hot Here’s Willy.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 315 ~No Rest For The Wicked~

My first day back at the Day Job officially, and I hope I’m not sick. Maybe the zombies will finally take the planet, which is far more likely than my finishing a book for publication, don’t you think? No Rest For The Wicked.

Monday, May 11, 2020

Log 315 ~No Rest For The Wicked~

Hundred And Thirty-Sixth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but I can’t be evil; I sleep way too much. Then again, I know plenty of sinners that sleep like babies. Am I saying that all rich people are evil… was it hard choosing sides between Captain America and Ironman? SIGH that has me thinking about the Day Job. No, I’m not a superhero, not even an ESSENTIAL worker, I’m only in retail. So how was my first day back? Well, seeing’s it’s Saturday right now, and last night I wanted to vomit looking at my schedule. As I talked about yesterday, being “Status Quo” is one thing. What evil things do keep me up at night?

The worse would have to be when My Dæmon isn’t feeling well. It means I’m forgetting what it is to be a father when I can’t help him. All of yesterday, I was figuring out how to buy his meds. I bought food, shared fries, let him hog the bed. Still, he’s an old man, and I’m fighting time. Speaking of time, what am I doing for Mother’s Day? One of those “holy” holidays I forgot about while talking to Dear Future Wife? The good news is, I haven’t forgotten, seeing again I know what day it is. Only what do I think about what my Mom told me yesterday about my grandfather? Should I be broken up, destroyed about my Granddad having the Coronavirus (COVID-19)? I told everyone about the man who said, and I quote, “I don’t know you,” and that’s not him being old. Family… what family?

No Lady Sophia I’m too busy looking at Girls, Girls, Girls, all night. I swear I can’t go to sleep until I, well? Afterward, I still don’t want to sleep, as Dennis Hof said, he goes looking for the next party. It’s like The Matrix; all I see is blonde, brunette, redhead. Same with my stories, didn’t I mention Indiana Gone, Whisper Girl, and Cherry. I write about the things I would like to do to women and then crickets, tumbleweeds, utter silence. I would never consider silence as my fear, but people treat it as a sin. If I want to talk about sin, though, what about the things I do to myself. Hell, it’s why I’m still alive.

If I ever published a book or built a brothel? No Rest For The Wicked.

I Will Have No Fear