Log 082 ~Will Sell Those F-Bombs~

If I had to speak at the “Day Job” on the daily, it would be nothing more than obscenities; strangely enough, one job makes me want to drop those bombs, and another is only a colorful word. “Will Sell Those F-Bombs”

Saturday, September 21, 2019

Log 082 ~Will Sell Those F-Bombs~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Millionaire right now, but I’m not exactly the best salesman on Earth. Yes, I’ve read a bit more of Dennis Hof’s book, my second reading. Now he was far from perfect, but he loved to? Anyway, I’m still trying to keep my mind off that particular F. The thing is my life revolves around three. FEAR, FAILURE, and FEMALES, the order changing depending on my mood. So how is that mood right now; I wish I could practice another F, forgetfulness to be honest.

Let’s focus on FAILURE, and how so, it hasn’t even been twenty-four hours. Hell again with my motivations but shouldn’t I focus on gratitude. I’m grateful that I had the money to buy that file uploader. How about having the courage to forge down this path? It’s a mixed bag this, fake it till you make it approach. Of course, all the motivations say that you have to believe first and foremost. While I’m going off on phrasing, what about spending money to make it Lady Lu? In the book Think And Grow Rich or The Secret talked about you can’t control every thought but if you feel happy? Money and Friendship, I care for “Indiana Gone” but her wedding SIGH. I’m not experiencing the Fear but the expense of it all, being a man.

Rule 102 and 001, a man shouldn’t be afraid all of the time. FEAR is my constant and what gets me moving along. How much stuff did I have to get rid of only so I could add that upload form? What about the Craigslist Ad or even Facebook, afraid to be me and why?

Like Marcus put it “Bitches man” (LANGUAGE). Must I be so crass, I tell Cherry about language, there’s a time for it of course. Anyway, contrary to popular belief, I respect FEMALES. Nobody asks why I do what I do ever. I’ve said it before I’ve written for guys for their girls. The internet knows enrichment with porn. I’m not even going down that road at the moment, but yes, I like to add beauty to the world. Some like guns, some cars, and we all love a bit of money don’t we Lady Lu. Bullets, Booze, Bullion, and Babes, pick your poison. Like Nicolas Cage in Lord of War, I have to empty the plane and be a necessary evil. Will Sell Those F-Bombs.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 080 ~Will Needs Role Models~

As the song goes, I Need A Hero, well maybe not a hero but a teacher, a guru, hell I’m dominant in the bedroom, but daily life is quite vexing. To think they called Daria the “Misery Chick.” “Will Needs Role Models”

Thursday, September 19, 2019

Log 080 ~Will Needs Role Models~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Millionaire right now, but if I listened to Dennis Hof, I’d have more. If I got around to rereading his book and I am trying. I’m not discouraged today, well today of all days, Thursday should be the best. Hell, why not every day, according to my many motivations. The voices in my head Dirty Diana and for once I mean my headphones. I could use their success but nowhere near their path. We need, no I need, my heroes where are they?

I’m starting from the top, Dennis Hof. A man who went from owning gas stations to brothels and he was a Republican politician. I couldn’t tell you a thing about his policies but from pennies to pussy. I’m lazy only lying here, but he didn’t go to bed without a naked lady or his dog Domino. Speaking of going to bed alone, I still wonder how “he” spent his nights. A modeling director I’ve mentioned before, but you know I go through such and such moments. Sometimes I’m proud and others, scared to utter a fucking word. Not Sean Weathers though. Now I’ve never seen one of his films all the way through. The thing is he created such movies at all. Someone said he only wanted to get laid but can you blame him?

Well, I blame my modeling guru, that’s how I found out about Kaelin. I’m a big fan of hers and her “sisters” Kelsey and Kandace. I found out though that Kaelin passed away recently. So, of course, they removed her image from their archive. The girl I can’t have makes me want her even more. It makes me question why I can’t have a typical role model. Yes, like celebrities, but I was thinking more like at the Day Job. Some girl died, and I couldn’t tell you who she was to save my life. A naughty nymph dies, and I scour the internet. No, my “father” was never my hero, but he takes care of his family, moneywise. I’ve hated nearly every boss I’ve had at the Day Job. My uncle, directed films but he also cheated on his wife; could I be better?

Relationships like Mr. Hof, proud to say my name, create like Mr. Weathers. I do want a family but so many lifestyles Dirty Diana, Wake Up, Will Needs Role Models.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 079 ~Don’t Kill The Will~

Here I go again about writing and women. You know this is why I’m so good at time travel, the more things change, the more they stay the same, so why do I even need to deliver the same message? “Don’t Kill The Will,” pretty please

Wednesday, September 18, 2019

Log 079 ~Don’t Kill The Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Millionaire right now; though people would jack me for less. Relax Inspector Echo, I’m still on NO FAP, but it’s hard. Now, what is it I told A&W at the Day Job, “this is why I don’t talk to women” Well it might be my mouth, and then it could be my email. I’ve messaged three models, of those two, had high potential. No responses, so what is my sin? I’m staying motivated, but my firstborn’s been sick, and I hit two spider webs when we went out walking.

Am I only the bearer of bad news. I did smack myself today because of my anxiety. Hell Inspector am I only talking to myself. I’ve checked my email accounts, but I haven’t heard anything from Outskirts Press either. Do you want to talk about Patreon? I’m not that guy that’s busy complaining, remember TIBU. What about how I spoke to MILF Dos today. Even now I get that twinge that if I say something, bam lost another friend. Wasn’t I complaining a few days ago about how I’m one friend down? Now have you ever heard that saying about would you like yourself if you met yourself? At the Day Job besides A&W, who’s a “friend,” him and his White Guilt, who respects me there? The more important question is, how am I going to launch this modeling business.

No worries on the part of Dennis Hof; he passed away. Anyway, it hasn’t stopped me from wanting to reread his book. Speaking of novels, I did finish “Unhinged,” one of my six impossible things down. What sort of guy does that make me Inspector Echo? I could go further with my ads. The work excites me, but people seeing who I am? As I said, I messaged people, could be scams, what if they’re not? All-day I’ve thought about buying that file upload software. Still, sending people to my blog, Patreon, Facebook, well shoot? When I would write words for guys to get their girls to drop their panties, well damn. I’m playing Cyrano de Bergerac all over again. The only thing now is, I’m hiding from myself and the small network I have.

I’m sorry I don’t have a better face. I apologize I’m asking so much of so many, but I won’t dare. Hard to live with but Don’t Kill The Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 077 ~Great, Just Be A Man~

I’m better than I was yesterday, but everything within me wants to argue you that fact and I need only wait until I get around some people and what the hell will happen to my manhood. Great, Just Be A Man.

Monday, September 16, 2019

Log 077 ~Great, Just Be A Man~

Hundred And Second Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Millionaire right now and remain a stickler for time. Haven’t I always been and with the Day Job? I need to be a step ahead, still. Does that mean I’m running? Well, Run Boy Run. The question is, where am I going, hell I’m always running at the Day Job. I woke up this morning (Sunday) because of a nightmare. Remember “Stupidest” from the Day Job; the dream had me running from a gaggle of them. Somebody killed me, but I don’t know who. Anyway, the moral I got was they were the better man.

Which, of course, leads me to today? Yesterday I got my Patreon running, and this morning I got my modeling page up. These are the thoughts of a businessman, a man that is doing. You know I’m always on the cusp of quoting Yoda or some great erotic writer. If I were only to be me though SIGH I’m upset I lost a Facebook friend. I’ll be in a bad mood for this week for a variety of reasons. Oh yeah, and the first block I was expecting came from the unexpected. What the hell NaNoWriMo I thought it was a funny meme. Speaking of pictures, what’s that I said about a modeling page? Can you believe I had the nerve? The moment I start talking about cover girls, I get a message from my publisher. Now that gave me a chill without a doubt.

To think; that’s one reason I hate fear so much, it stops you from thinking. Anyway, I want to live such a life, and the smallest things get in the way. You know maybe that’s the rub. Now, this is more Lady Sophia’s thing, but a writer is akin to a god. The idea is after I create the man has to deal with the mess. Mountain from a molehill so you might ask me why go all out. Again it makes me feel great and then I know I’ll have to get by when it comes to life. If I had my way Madam Justice I would be strong enough to tell people to Fuck Off (LANGUAGE). What happens to those kinds of people in my stories? One of my motivations says to be the hero of your story. Why live History books? Before that Madam Justice, needn’t be Great, Just Be A Man?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 075 ~How Many Wills Later~

As the song goes Gotta Have The Money if you want to get the honey and that I have, well until October perhaps or the next pretty face; still makes me feel like a schoolboy but what’s my age again? “How Many Wills Later”

Saturday, September 14, 2019

Log 075 ~How Many Wills Later~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Millionaire right now, and it’s been one week since “The Day.” Well, that’s having faith that I will survive the rest of this day (Friday the 13th). Indiana Gone got me close to a machete for Christmas last year. Anyway, time to focus on one more revolution around the sun. Two weeks in and how close am I to that million? $10.00 down from this week and last. Still there’s life in me, haven’t even checked how long I’ve gone without Fapping. Oh and porn, only educational, or ripping off ExCoGi’s model pages right?

With all the writing I do, I’ve never written a will. I’m not suicidal but if there was a button to end it all right now? Yeah, I would press it by accident. I’ve announced I’m going to die over the years. There have been some attempts, but if I died today who would get all my stuff? Hell, how much am I offering models these days? Lady Lu that’s what nobody understands, that rush, adrenaline, motivation. Sex is one thing but when I got MILF Dos to take off her clothes. You know having that sort of power, I want more. It’s not like I’m going into photography anytime soon. How many times in one week have I told you about my studies? When I was back in school I never hungered for knowledge most days. History was my subject, and some science but they never teach you the fun stuff. The wrong word?

The things that make you proud that get you to say, I want to do that one day. I might not have the patience, which explains today. Once a week on Craigslist, posting would be $260.00. I paid more for my first model. Should math be my subject now? I hated that above all others. Didn’t stop me from wasting about an hour again, working on a model page. How many days has it been since I talked to Outskirts Press? As the song goes, “Cause I just wanna look good for you.” My novel and funny how they were barking until they got my money and now radio silence. Publishers along with the rest of the world since “The Day.” One more reason I call it that, the end of my existence Lady Lu. When anybody cares again I ask How Many Wills Later.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 073 ~Ahegao If You Will~

The only O Face I’ve made in weeks is Oh My Sweet Buttery Jesus. I should make gaming videos like TheRadBrad but as far as neglecting things I haven’t played Heavy Rain in a while, working on my life’s purpose. Ahegao If You Will

Thursday, September 12, 2019

Log 073 ~Ahegao If You Will~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Millionaire right now and on the grind. Yes, that made me want to laugh too, but I’m interested in another face. Is it a smile? Well, I did find my Fidget Cube or sooner had it returned; it was sitting on my locker at the Day Job. As far as work goes, this is endgame. The theme this week, writing and women, which is plenty of work. Speaking of which, listening to Spotify, I found that Jennifer Love Hewitt song “It’s Good to Know I’m Alive.” Adding to my, well not temptation but Vicki Vallencourt from “The Waterboy.”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1c1s_pgEmzI

Now I always say that dreams are messages. Last night with my porn studies; Dirty Diana, I am studying the legality of creating adult movies. Anyway, it’s hard work, dirty work, okay I’m trying to stop. How do my motivations say, when you do what you love, right? Only remember I was studying Sin Stocks last week? Finding out anything about the adult entertainment industry has complications. There’s no plan other than finding a good lawyer, and Legalzoom wants $216 for a business advisory plan. Add them and Wendy’s to Ruby Tuesday; businesses I hate. So now I’m making a mad face but where’s the gratitude? I’m not lying in bed, I didn’t get fired from one job, and I’m working on my life’s purpose.

I still hate smiling, though, which leads me to another face, “Ahegao.” When I was young SIGH, I moved up another age bracket. Now Ahegao means panting or moaning face. Dirty Diana, that’s perfect for my book “GULP.” I should talk to Lady Sophia about that but when my worlds of sex and writing collide? Even this morning on top of everything else I was looking at how to get File Upload Forms. I also watched a video on release forms. Would I do such a thing if I was some horny fuckboy? You know I have more porn than I know what to do with and I stole around 95% of my collection. Getting girls to take off their clothes hell, I’ve done that so it’s possible. I sound like Les Brown. It’s Possible. Why is it so difficult to learn though and why not try something more conventional?

Again it’s good to know that I’m alive. Nothing does it like an “O Face” or Ahegao If You Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 072 ~Will’s Pretty A Mused~

The two things I sit down at my computer for, writing and women; whatever happened to my dreams of world domination I ask you but wouldn’t that be a major sin on top of everything else? “Will’s Pretty A Mused.”

Wednesday, September 11, 2019

Log 072 ~Will’s Pretty A Mused~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Millionaire right now; if only I had been a better man. On 2001 today I was sitting in my senior English class when my country suffered a terrorist attack. Hell I was in the Navy for a few weeks but not because of 9/11. If I had the cash would I have helped? I nearly failed that class Inspector Echo. So what have I been studying this week? Last week it was Sin Stocks and Sean Weathers. For the past few days it’s been Ads, Lighting Fixtures, and prices for actresses here and there.

I swear Inspector Echo I rise for three reasons. If my firstborn needs me for anything, his life is my number one priority. I bragged about him to my sister on her birthday. Of course it’s right after my “DAY.” Did I mention that Ruby Tuesday still sucks? Unlike my taste in women right? I haven’t been referring to temptations these days because real life has been; well I don’t know. I was excited after I got that message yesterday; now she was beautiful. The second one I got today, as the song goes I’m a ladies’ man a businessman. Now that brings me to what I did by placing that Ad for my book. So my other two reasons for being, writing, and sex. Well not sex I’m not STUPID though fear has screwed with my judgment. MILF Dos is starting a business so why not me, especially now.

The Day Job has me terrified enough. I also have the fear that the police are going to show up any minute. Remember, I got arrested at my punishment school? High school fun right Inspector? The cops did show up maybe a month or so ago at the Day Job. Somebody pushed the wrong button. Now isn’t that a sin, my guilt complex? More like all I do these days is pushing the wrong button. I’m trying to stay a day ahead, but I killed a few hours on my Ad. The moment I go looking for models somebody comes with more wit and money. Brevity as THEY say, but I’m pretty wordy. At least that wind, those breaths aren’t over my pillow, I’m “working.” Yeah, looking up Amazon and how to do File Upload forms right here Inspector Echo.

I apologize for saying no at the Day Job but now Will’s Pretty A Mused.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 070 ~Just Wake The “Hell” Up~

When you’re asleep the monsters can’t get you, I heard that in Blue Gender but what am I going to hear tomorrow, chances are it’s going to be all kinds of Hell, but I refuse to lie there and take it anymore. Just Wake The “Hell” Up

Monday, September 9, 2019

Log 070 ~Just Wake The “Hell” Up~

Hundred And First Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Millionaire right now, and also a Time Traveler. Not only because I’m from 1984 literally. Yes I know I’m starting this on a Sunday. If I were, to be honest, Monday has always been a bad day. Eric Thomas does his TGIM’s Thank God It’s Monday. I have a few in my motivational playlist. The thing is, as the rule states, I need to wake up; I mean to everything Madam Justice. As the song goes, open your eyes, look up to the skies and see. Wishing on a star.

Most mornings, when I get up there is nothing but darkness. I can blame The Day Job or my ambitions. The sad thing is, when it’s The Day Job, next comes the bathroom light. I’m a writer, aren’t I? Shouldn’t I be taking that darkness and getting it down on the page? You know the only thing I love more is my Firstborn. Sometimes I see his cute furry face looking at me for his daily walk. He’s there, the sun is up, the birds, everything. It’s a disservice to keep my head down. It’s like I’m looking for real estate, you know. Find a spot and start digging. I look at my life anticipating a zombie apocalypse you know. Often I imagine I’ll make the perfect survivor, but these days I feel like I’m dead. Who knows what could happen as they always say, live each day as though it’s your last; do I?

Well, today (Sunday) I took a step in that direction. You want to know why I feel dead Madam Justice. It’s illegal for me to be alive. Why do I find solace amongst the dead, the machines, I speak on clones. I write about beasts because they have that excuse. It’s too damn easy to lie there and be a joke. Most people aren’t alive; they’re fucking noisemakers (LANGUAGE). Then those same idiots wonder why they are so exhausted all the time. We aren’t allowed to rest because we are too busy always being someone else or something. You know what wakes me up, a pretty face and a nice pair of boobs. The fact that I will look any man or beast in the eye that threatens my kid. Having a damn brain SIGH.

I can’t sleep away life; I’ll face the living nightmares. Just Wake The “Hell” Up

I Will Have No Fear

Log 068 ~I Will This Year~

Here I am as the song goes, one more year and if you asked my honest opinion on whether I’m better or worse, well unlike our president I can freely admit that I messed up but next time? “I Will This Year.”

Saturday, September 7, 2019

Log 068 ~I Will This Year~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Millionaire right now or here’s hoping as right now it’s Friday. Last week I spoke about being on the stock exchange. If anything now is the time to take stock of my life. Hell on the previous “DAY” I sat in front of my TV eating expensive McDonald’s. I didn’t want to go out.

Today, “Friday” I took five hundred dollars and went to a strip club. I still have that same five hundred dollars. Don’t look at me like that Lady Lu. I did cut the grass, and I still have to clean the whole house tonight. I also picked up spaghetti sauce and more McDonald’s. The best “DAY” I had was years ago, feeling up “Okay” and then taking “Indiana Gone” to the movies. What this DAY will bring, I don’t want to know. I said before it’s like being back in high school bad grades and all. There was nothing to celebrate. For the most part, I’ve hidden it well. Damn my bank, Facebook, and even Team USA. So I’m not doing anything? I could go to the movies or out for Chinese. I could order a steak and baked potato. For once I could pay for porn. Like buying my first Fleshlight all over again.

Of course I should be in Reno. I told you all this before; my Red Dawn Purge Fantasy. So what’s my age again as the song goes? Better question, how will this new year be any different. Last year I said I would be sitting on a million. I could be looking at it right now. The only thing is, it’s on white paper instead of green. Alice wanted $200 for doing absolutely nothing, would serve me right. I spend $14.00 not to FAP. Years ago I paid $300 to do so in style, three sleeves, a case, and three tubes of lube. As I was listening to my motivations while cutting the grass again, they say Find Your Purpose. It’s been a year, and I still know what it is and the secret of life. It’s the least I can do to share such things with you.

Seek Out A Kingdom Worthy Of Your Soul

The Adult Entertainment Industry

Don’t make promises that you can’t keep. For now, all I know is I want to survive today and tomorrow. JSS, I Will This Year.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 066 ~Lust This Once Will~

Last week I said, Somebody’s Got To Do It and every day when I’m not living up to my potential well hell, I’ve nearly quit my job a few times this week for people treating me like I’m stupid and I shouldn’t be happy. Lust This Once Will, I wish.

Thursday, September 5, 2019

Log 066 ~Lust This Once Will~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Millionaire right now, but Dennis Hof was worth more. I can imagine the stories Jimmy Stephens can tell. Only this week, I began studying Sean Weathers. They’re B-Movies; lacking funding but quite fascinating.

I’m somewhat uneasy mentioning these gentlemen. That alone might suggest this line of work isn’t for me in some way. However, much like my writing, though it’s something that has never left my mind. In a way it’s like people and religion. My steadfast belief in the zombie apocalypse. What about that dream where my mom was ashamed of what I do. It’s one of the reasons I’ve been studying. Hell, I wanted to be a YouTube reactor once. Tell me how to do that on-screen screen action I mean everyone does that. It’s a man’s purpose to talk a woman out of her clothes, procreation and such. I’ve done it before with my poetry though I didn’t reap the benefits. I’ve paid to get it done but no sex; talk about self-control though “Okay” might disagree. Now what Diana?

Dennis Hof wrote about taking girls on dates. Only he wasn’t the boyfriend. Bad boys would pay him to fool the parents, and all he need do is deliver the girl for the real dater. Doesn’t that sound evil but I’ve sounded like that all day. Today is Wednesday. I also read that Jimmy Stephens is getting back into the business. Now you know I can do that on Pinterest. I got nailed for one of my boards a year or so ago with “clothed” adult actresses. One of my “hottest” boards though it’s strange. Lastly, Sean Weathers; now let’s say his movies pan out at $3,000 to $5,000 a pop? I’m not that brutal, yeah says the man who tried to talk two redheads into a Purge/The Corpse of Anna Fritz mash-up. I only got a thousand and a publishing contract that’s gathering dust.

Yeah, I could be working on my book, but I’m talking to you a day early. Instead I have research, how much actresses cost, equipment, and video release forms. Doesn’t sound sexy today but it beats the organization skills of the Day Job. Also I’m still keeping it in my pants. Thursday I will be much too tired and humiliated. What happened to positivity, my Day Job, that’s what. Be happy, Lust This Once Will

I Will Have No Fear