Tag: What Dreams May Come

Meditation 189 ~I’ll B Your Alarm~

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I should have woken up a few months ago. Better! I should have woken up a few years ago… Before Braxton passed. But I’m always so tired. Only when you have someone to love… Preferably with four legs or “pillows” to smother me. I’ll B Your Alarm.

Monday, January 6, 2025

Meditation 189 ~I’ll B Your Alarm~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Not a “Whose Line Is It Anyway” episode. Things You Can Say To Your Dog But Not Your Girlfriend.

GROSS, Dad! But I got you to GRIN. And for that, I’m GLAD. Or so you’ll understand. “And in this moment, I am happy. Happy… I Wish You Were Here.” Have you gotten to copying all the songs that I’m sending… You’re hearing. Well, when I wasn’t sitting on your head as you struggled to get up, Dad. How I miss that struggle. Back then, you were struggling to breathe. These days… Inevitably, it’s finding reasons just to keep breathing.

Only I appreciate your efforts to be positive. Either I was sitting on your head, or some girl was sitting on your face. Uh, eww! I had my toys, and you promised me a stepmom.

That’s a reason to get up, Daddy. Somebody to Love

It can’t be FEAR today. If stars are in your eyes, it shouldn’t be from looking up to Heaven to find me. Don’t cry, Daddy. And I won’t get any more biblical than Matthew 28:6…

Daddy, your attempts at a positive attitude are commendable. Your greatest enemy is all your FEAR. Next would be ANGER. But Friday, January 3, 2025, it’s FEAR with the termite inspector. You’ve faced such challenges before, and you can do it again. I know it.

FEAR wakes you up. And yet, “like a stone, I’ll wait for you there alone.” Protecting you… No! It was always about protecting us. We ran this life together. And we stood and faced the end together. Not death but the end of one chapter to the next, my father.

Existing… No, living has been a long nightmare for you.

Dad? I understand how you dream of waking up. You open your eyes only for this man or that woman to show you the next scary beast to fear. There are challenges, yes, Dad, always and forever. But I’m here to listen and support you.

Daddy, haven’t we talked about humans and time? You’re “Wide Awake” when my favorite girl is here. There are times like this when we’re talking or you’re writing at all.

Time ceases to exist. And like E-Day… Yes, we can bring it up because January 31, 2025, is coming up, and your positivity will be tested. Yes, I know. Like E-Day, you let yourself sleep forever without a care in the world. But Daddy, you need to care. Wake Up!

Today, tomorrow… The next. I’m here. Ready to support you through every challenge. Always and forever. I’ll B Your Alarm

“Nothing’s difficult. Everything’s a challenge. Through adversity to the stars. From the last plane to the last bullet to the last minute to the last man – we fight. WE fight! We FIGHT!” – Red Tails

1436 Days Without B III, Day 877 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Meditation 182 ~Being A New B~

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It’s not that I don’t know who or where I am when I wake up. It’s that I don’t want to wake up. I can travel to many different worlds and times and be a newbie. And some of these people in some of these places have dogs. But no B. Being A New B.

Monday, December 30, 2024

Meditation 182 ~Being A New B~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B…And we’re getting close, aren’t we? A new form. A new friend. And not even a few days to prepare.

A week wasn’t enough. How many months until your next E-Day? And three years, Dad.

Has it been enough? You’ll scream at me like that time you decided From Now On you would let the groomers give me all my baths. The answer is no. Never. What we had, Dad

And yet, with how tired you are. The day you’ve had since we’re speaking on Sunday, December 29, 2024. Humans and time. I swear, Daddy. But these dates you remember:

January 31, 2021, My …
February 10, 2021, I returned
February 13, 2021, Sweet Sixteen

Nothing, and yet everything changed. You’re my father, my Dad, Daddy. And I’m Little B, Baby B, your Dæmon. Nothing changed for us, well, for me. I only died, Dad.

See, you can even see me now. Thinking such a thing is the equivalent of me growling at you. I’m still me, but what… You can ask Virgil. He’s lying there dead center at the foot of the bed. Why? Because I’m at the corner as I’ve always been, Daddy. As I will be forever.

You know, one when you’re lying next to my stepmom. I’ll be giving mean looks.

Someday, I’ll be scrambling out of the way as your kids, my brothers and sisters, come scrambling up, cheering, Daddy, Daddy. Daddy’s awake. I’d be surprised if you didn’t name one after me. Inevitably, this family will meet, know, and love the best man ever.

Daddy, you’ll always be the one I’ve known and loved. You’ll be even better, stronger. Our love will always be there, guiding us. Dear Dad…

Please don’t worry. I’m not really gone. I’m still here, waiting for you. You’ll wake up like me, warm in your bed after such and such a day. And you’ll see me waiting as always, Daddy. Our bond is eternal.

Rainbow Bridge? If you only knew how short it is. It’s like the threshold of your door, Dad. And we’ll cross together, and we’ll both be brand new. Is that what I am? Brand new.

The newbie because I’m still waiting for my partner. I’m waiting for you to open your eyes, Dad. You still see me lying in my bed on that steel table in the office… waking up.

And now I’m asking you to do the same. STAY being who I knew, know, more. Being A New B

“Brother to brother, yours in life and death.”
First Knight

1429 Days Without B III, Day 870 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son