Tag: Women

Log 037 ~Standing With A Willie~

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A great man once sang “stand up for your rights,” and someone else said if you won’t stand for something; well these two legs can take me places but my eyes are looking down, though things get an inevitable rise out of me. Standing With A Willie

Wednesday, August 7, 2019

Log 037 ~Standing With A Willie~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Millionaire right now, and no my mind isn’t in the gutter. Okay, truth be told another cosplayer “Jada Jinxx.” We’ll get to the begging portion of the program soon enough. Today I want to talk about courage, the strength to stand. Hard when you can’t stand the man in the mirror; neither can they.

Up against the wall mother; yes, I looked that up. That’s how I was at work today, nowhere to go and nothing to do there. So I redid two of the walls of hanging crap, paintings, metal décor, etc. Staring at the wall meant I didn’t have to look at people. Not that I could even if I wanted to anyway. My eyes are conscientious objectors in this war for my life. On the other hand, they could be living in 3017. That’s me looking at the dirt or how long it would take me to find courage. Is it any wonder I write dystopias? How about the only life after death, I believe in is zombies? Anyway, so I’m working from one wall to the next. I’m getting all these backstabbers complimenting behind my back. Like I’m any better; should have seen me yesterday. Someone knocked on my door, and I had my knife behind me, saving people time.

You know for finding reasons to fire me at some point. In writing Inspector Echo, I’m an army of one. Army, again look at the title. I was channeling Ellie Goulding’s song. I wish I could say I had someone I counted on with all my heart. Yes of course B III but let’s look at humans. My “father” that’s more predatory dominance. I feel like less of a real man, depending on him. There, of course, is the job I despise. If I lose it, I’ll be wandering the desert with my dick in my hands (LANGUAGE). So yes this morning, the man in the mirror, well the shower SIGH. I’m still with NO FAP but the things I was thinking. There, now we can talk about the new girl or the others rolling around in my brain. Closing my eyes but still staring at a wall or the floor, Let’s say TWD is chock full of hot women.

Damn all these beautiful girls as the song goes, oh and work. Missed a huddle but Standing With A Willie.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 035 ~Nothing To Prove To Anybody~

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The lives we live or survive, some people have wealth, others have scars, some have only an inch of air in front of their face, and that in itself can be too much, why are they so deserving, am I? Nothing To Prove To Anybody.

Monday, August 5, 2019

Log 035 ~Nothing To Prove To Anybody~

Ninety-Sixth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, but you don’t have to believe that. How about the fact that I respect women? Sure doesn’t look that way right? What about that I do my best at the Day Job? The idea that I love my firstborn more than anything? Of course, the big one these days would be that I’m an innocent man. It’s 4 AM, and you know the reason I’m up. For the record, I did get about six hours of sleep, and I still haven’t checked Facebook yet.

Speaking of which, when I do post some political discord there, it’s what I believe. I’m not trying to prove I’m a Dem, Liberal, or anything, only that this is what I know. Hell like Jon Snow everyone says I know nothing, but he was just himself. The problem is he didn’t know who that was most of the time. I should stop comparing myself to him, though. As always I avoid the man in the mirror too. Yesterday though I had to shave and I saw all the grey hairs; how did I get so old not living? Even now it’s like I need permission to exist. I need to prove I have the right to such a thing. My Six Impossible Things list, I have to prove I’m a good father, a man, I get apps to try and hold myself accountable Justice.

What about September, am I going to make it to Nevada. $200.00 for a number I never use, how much do I spend on Brainbuddy, and I was checking out some Cosplayer. If anything I’m proving fear runs my life and I get that for free. Let’s not forget the other $250 for my book and even more for a cover. What about all the motivational speakers I listen to or the time spent lost in music wanting to feel brave. Don’t be brave, have a little common sense as one song goes. All this effort for people that don’t give a damn and hell I don’t either. That is until something hurts them like the hack job. Again being a dominant and a sadist I get turned on by pain but only that which I control. Pain proves we’re still alive, so why don’t I embrace all of it in my life Madam Justice.

The answer is still this, Nothing To Prove To Anybody.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 031 ~Will Takes A Drive~

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Vroom, vroom, I’ve slept in my car before, but as far as “sleeping” with someone else well, I have a pretty good driving record considering some things and only ever got pulled over twice and for a black man that’s dangerous. Will Takes A Drive.

Thursday, August 1, 2019

Log 031 ~Will Takes A Drive~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Millionaire right now but not a car guy. If I earn enough money, I only want five cars. Mine, My Wife’s, Street Jet (Rob Dyrdek), Soccer Mom’s Minivan, and a Limo plus hot tub. My kids will get cars too, but time to talk about baby-making and not baby-raising Dirty Diana I hope.

At least, I want to can’t say I’m feeling my inner pimp at the moment. Yeah this coming from the guy that first thing in the morning looked up Kosame Dash. “Public Pickups” is fast becoming a favorite and to think weeks ago, it was “Oldje.” I still think about that woman in the Walmart parking lot, my chance at “Street Blowjobs.” The things that turn me on Dirty Diana hmm, innocence, plaid skirts, and in this moment cars. The voyeur side of me or the exhibitionist, having two cameras. I’m always worried about how people see me these days. One more reason I’m not all hot, at least in my pants. Besides getting mad at work, I lost another friend on Facebook. I know I always take things like this too hard; no not like that, Brainbuddy asked will I make August clean? Hell, it hasn’t been twenty-four hours, but I’m only doing research.

Speaking of my “learning,” I’ve looked over the motivations of women. I make that sound so deep, but let’s look at “Wolfenstein: Youngblood.” I like vulnerable women with the heart to fight, but there’s something about women that can kick ass. Jessie and Sophie Blazkowicz, Anya, Abby. Back in the day, I was all for Gabrielle, the Battling Bard of Potidaea. How about the fact I like women that are shapely enough to get down in a car? Refer to my list of five, which pretty much means all women. Getting back to my drives, yes I’m still a sadist, watching pain gets me going, inflicting it more so. If anything though I want a woman that makes me her drive, her focus. Give me Taylor Townsend stalking me any day, and I’d be down.

Don’t need a woman for that though I’m still down about plenty of things. One month to make a million dollars. My job leaves me scared. I have friends that are hurting something awful. I got two cars and nowhere to go. People run me so Will Takes A Drive.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 030 ~Four On Will’s Fairway~

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Last week I talked about counting on me, and today it’s been hours at work, seven new Pinterest boards I believe, and I didn’t even broach the subject of a million dollars in one month, still not published. Four On Will’s Fairway.

Wednesday, July 31, 2019

Log 030 ~Four On Will’s Fairway~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Millionaire right now, and like Eric Thomas, I don’t play golf. Here I was expecting four days off when I have six. Sticking with the four though, I won’t tell you the story of “The Big D,” SIGH. For the record that was the first time, I fell in love. It’s why once upon a time Four was a lucky number as in Group 4. Should I tell you about Group Five Photosports; hell I wish. Yeah, I already broke down again. Fear The Walking Dead fantasies plus Kneeling Kinkster Kennedy. Let’s also add Kosame Dash: Letting It Air Out “Public Pickups” and some Angie Varona for good measure.

Never thought about it before but is that why I’m partial to the numbers three and five? You must forgive my scatterbrain, hell I’m going to need it over the next few days. For now, only one thing has been on my mind, and that’s walking out. I told “Cherry” a bit of this, but I got asked to come in today at the Day Job. Low and behold the first question out of the Manager’s mouth is “what are you doing today?” Dammit, Inspector Echo (LANGUAGE) I’m dominant for a reason. I like what I like; I know what I want. Well, “MILF Dos” might disagree, but I have quite the imagination. Anyway, so I blow up at her and the flower child and leave work thirty minutes early. So of course you know I have to worry this week and the next; it happens. Here’s the worrying list:

One job, one source of income, I can’t get fired.

Two girls I yelled at and two lives to worry about, me and B III

Three tacos from Burger King, they suck, Taco Bell forever

Four women that got me FAPPING again well six actually

Five tasks I did accomplish at the Day Job. Shelves cleaned, Trash, Upstairs hardware, Candles and Avengers display set-up, Stockroom

Only it’s never enough. I always tell myself. Hell, I was so out of it this morning with the fantasy and the madness. I didn’t make the bed, and when I got back hell, I’ve been zoned out. I value myself and my time, but I ate those nasty tacos and played around on Pinterest. 158 Sections on one board.

Forgive me Inspector Echo, like Trump, Four On Will’s Fairway

I Will Have No Fear

Log 028 ~Always Be Prepared For War~

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Last week I talked about people giving orders, but I once heard in a game “a man chooses, a slave obeys” I never chose to be this way, no I was a slave of my looks, my words, my desires things that make me want to fight. Always Be Prepared For War ha

Monday, July 29, 2019

Log 028 ~Always Be Prepared For War~

Ninety-Fifth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, but I am not ready for power. Like today Madam Justice I was not prepared for war. Every day I gird myself for disappointment. I know that my days at the Day Job will bring about more humiliation. Last week was nothing but one fuck-up (LANGUAGE) after another worried about this week. In the morning, I tell myself I’ll wake up early to read, and then I cut my alarm off. I want to fight temptation, and then I have horrific FTWD fantasies. Worst thought I was not down for the cause, again ready for wickedness, winning, for war.

So what brought this on, my C-3PO feelings of being helpless. How do you even define helpless? “Unable to defend oneself or to act without help.” There’s “Uncontrollable,” I think that about covers it Madam Justice. No positive vibes today but I still no better than to wish harm. However, I couldn’t stop three girls from laughing at me. My General Manager continues to treat me like I’m retarded. The usual manager is useless and treats me as a child. Haven’t I mentioned he’s pretty touchy-feely? Weak, Pathetic, Useless, I’m going against all my motivations right now. If it wasn’t that, it was fucking anger (LANGUAGE) today, I wanted to fight no doubt. I tried to march into the GM’s office all day. “Look I’m leaving, I’m not some fucking retard, and not some damn virus” (YES AGAIN). It was like being back in school with both teams saying you take him he’s not wanted.

Is that why I’m taking what’s going on in my country so personally. From metal to a man that controls it, Magneto; I know what it’s like to be shit on for everything (MORE). It’s because you’re black, skinny, fucked up teeth, you wear the same clothes. I know what it’s like to wear a FUBU shirt (youth) and be sitting by yourself the very next day. I see how easy people have it, the laws. Still, because there is work to do people like me are considered ungrateful. Rule 13 states Power Is All That Matters. Like Markus in DBH, (still a great game) if people want to crack jokes and tear me down okay. Use their stones for fortresses, the pen and keyboard are my swords. Hellfire is how my armor’s forged;, they instilled it in the flesh. Always Be Prepared For War.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 024 ~Will Come The Silence~

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I’m the strong silent type, well minus the strong I suppose, but I always get that I’m a great listener but whoever listens to me and there are so many things you can do in bed other than that thing. “Will Come The Silence” sometimes, but what’s next

Thursday, July 25, 2019

Log 024 ~Will Come The Silence~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Millionaire right now but shush. Now you know I’m one for moans, whimpers, and screams, yeah I’m no good with dialogue novel wise. Anyway, there is something to be known about the sound of silence. Now should I take the crass route and talk about women gagging. You know choosing a dick over-breathing. How about the use of sex toys though I buy women beautiful lingerie for a reason. There’s also the whole “stalker” angle sigh. Let me reiterate the fact that I’ve never done that, shocker right?

What I mean is I’ve never been one to watch a porno, naked women are everywhere. When I see a particular actress that I like, I have to find her video history. I’m hopeless sometimes in my way. Take, for example, Hayden Bell; she did Sweet Slurpee for Reality Kings. I know a few of her movies, but Street Blowjobs is my favorite. I like Whitley Wright from Prom Night and maybe one other film. My point is dominants study submissives. A one-night stand is one thing but to study a particular woman, to have a personal connection. Again I’m not talking hidden cameras or hiding that type of thing. It’s feeling something beyond language and hell what happens if I tell the truth? What about if I try to be nice? I hate playing Cyrano de Bergerac, not again.

I’ve said it often enough I love Saturday mornings lying in bed with a woman. You know I’ve got my 40’s and 50’s Nuclear Pop, the only time I listen anymore. How about reading a book in bed or on the loveseat? A trip to the library or the movies? You know I think that’s the ticket, intimacy you hear it in the silence. As the song goes, “but words sometimes get in the way.” It’s always spoiled things for me. I know that much is true. If I can’t talk, why should she right? Dirty Diana with my current body issues better I not talk at all. Still, there is the problem of communication, one more reason for a submissive. She learns to anticipate a dominant no words required. In a way that’s my novel but where does the time go these days wow.

Wanted to talk about The Beast and the Dead, and frozen vengeance but you know I Will Come The Silence.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 023 ~Counting On You Will~

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Hurt oh let me count the ways but shouldn’t I count my blessings, how I hate the church, but those habits die hard, and I sort of feel like I’m dying from my side to my overabundance of sleep. “Counting On You Will”

Wednesday, July 24, 2019

Log 023 ~Counting On You Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Millionaire right now so you would think I could buy a heart. Hell like The Legend of Zelda the truth is I’m living on some. Didn’t Stevie Wonder talk about living enough, yes I know the lyrics. Only I don’t need my “writing resource” penalizing me again. Speaking of which that is what I’m counting up, crimes, slings, and arrows, other pains. For example, I have to report to Brainbuddy again, like rehab, you know. I woke up after a long nap and of course what happens well happened.

So should I blame “Sweet Slurpee Hayden Bell” from Reality Kings? Perhaps one Pinterest board that now has 151 Sections. Yes, I still plan on owning a brothel one day. I wonder how many girls Dennis Hof had on his roster at any one time? Of course, the Milf isn’t helping. Besides those numbers, there’s the list of aliments I’m suffering through today. How many ribs are broken, not for real? I go for days not thinking about my perfect ears but then again? Mornings are getting weird besides being so tired, but of course, I don’t have a schedule. Case and point we’re talking, and I should be reading. I need to drink more water, There’s never enough hours in the day, and my email is going to explode. What about getting my book published again, for Kindle only?

I think the title is an adequate sentiment, “Gulp.” As far as other book titles, the one I finished, “Fangs For Coming” or how about “Faces Only Fangs Could Love?” The blurb still requires more writing than I’m willing to do right now. Anyway, this week haven’t I mention gratitude, being grateful, hell the ideas keep coming. I have more food than I know what to do with Inspector Echo. If anything, I need to eat more or change my diet. The fact that I can is quite a blessing. How about the fact that I can wear jeans at work all the time now? B III has plenty of time I keep saying to myself because I refuse to think otherwise. I protect him from the negative plus he doesn’t understand the news. I’ll say it, I love my country but hate the President. Now my day job and the people, that’s a question.

I’m sorry I hate Math Echo, Counting On You Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 021 ~Give Orders You Would Follow~

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Camp NaNoWriMo, well general NaNoWriMo says 50,000 words, so I get it done, Brainbuddy suggest a podcast, and I listen to a bit, and of course, B III demands his morning stroll, when will someone follow me. Give Orders You Would Follow

Monday, July 22, 2019

Log 021 ~Give Orders You Would Follow~

Ninety-Fourth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, and you can be too. Yeah, I sound like one of my many motivations, Eric Thomas, Tom Bilyeu, Ray Lewis, etc. A better way of saying today’s rule might be Practice What You Preach. Yesterday, for example, I told myself I was going to finish my story, and I did so. Because Camp NaNoWriMo says, you can write 50,000 words in 30 days I finished. Even this morning, while I was on Brainbuddy for once. I read about this podcast, Porn Free Radio #185 How Successful Guys Overcome Edging.

My point is Madam Justice is I want to be a leader. You can’t lead, though unless you know what it means to follow. In my experience, I have known too many corrupt leaders. I always speak about the men that I admire. In these past days, I can add many more women. Don’t look at me like that, I respect women despite my BDSM teachings and dirty talk. Hell in my novel, the head honcho was a woman, the Mistress Director, and she’s a female I despise. Sadly though the leaders I’m surrounded by either make me laugh or make my blood boil. There’s the General Manager at the Day Job, A&W, my “father,” more. I want to be the best leader I can be for those who would follow. I’m a traditionalist, and I believe that a man, a husband, a father must lead his family, you know.

Any true leader of men, a commander, a general, a king, must be willing to die for those he leads. You know I’m not afraid to die, I’m scared to look STUPID. Madam Justice that remains my trigger. The fear that those under my charge will know failure because of my direction. They will know dejection, destruction, and death, and I will not do that to anyone. Strangely enough, my leaders lead me to such things. Brainbuddy is one of the few things that drive me towards being a better person. Rather than hating myself. If you give orders that should be the goal, for betterment. Soldiers will die to protect their families, their country. A submissive and dominant are both set free with their power. My son is happy because he knows I defend him, rethink the leash dynamic.

“Higher, Faster, Further baby” didn’t I say I respect women; Give Orders You Would Follow.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 017 ~Winning Willie By Daylight~

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It’s sad that I still remember the Sailor Moon theme song, I watched a teen react into an adult, a quite beautiful adult, that Snow White can’t be hot, well she can but not for my poetry I guess. “Winning Willie By Daylight.”

Thursday, July 18, 2019

Log 017 ~Winning Willie By Daylight~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Millionaire right now, but it isn’t from the fairytales. One of these days I’ll have to show you my “Winx Club” poetry from an LSD binge. I wish I were all sorts of high today, of course, I’m still reeling over yesterday. Nobody took down my comment though, and I’ve already moved on to making other women smile or offending them. One liked when I quoted Mariah Carey, another offered nudes for $200. She was one of those Teen/Adult React girls, legal now, but I’m still chasing boobs.

No wonder I’ve been fucking up with the porn lately. I’m going to have to report myself to Brainbuddy again thank you Mia Khalifah. “Graduating Summa Cum Loud” to be specific. Plaid skirts and glasses have always been my weakness. Always looking towards innocence as I carry so much guilt. I need something colorful, “Daddy’s Little Doll” series or “The Innocence Of Youth.” I know the difference of fantasy from reality Dirty Diana. I never figured I’d see one of those gamer girls naked. Still won’t, she had to get offers way “bigger” than mine, and no I’m not that crass. I go so nuts when I see Angie Varona all grown up of course.

How about growing up though and not offending any real women, Sailor Moon. Now I already said I wrote about the Winx Club, I knew W.I.T.C.H, but Sailor Moon sigh. My favorite was always Sailor Mercury, smart and sexy; I think I see a theme developing. I’ve never been one for bimbos, and you know my views on STUPIDITY. If it’s not innocence, it’s a woman that’s above it all. Again the woman dressed up as Snow White, I was worried over nothing? I’m still not sure, but I’ve never seen an ugly Disney Princess.

Let me go lower though; I’ve gotten back into Hentai. Kojin Taxi and Isaku mostly. From Kotomi Asakawa, Kyouko Sakai, Nanami Takeuchi, you know the Devil’s in the details. I wish I had all the time to research and enjoy, but The Lion King awaits. That’s something I never got into, Furries; okay, Lola Bunny. The world has become so much uglier these days. If it’s not the day job, well can I blame this on Trump? How about my novel, my eyes need something beautiful and pure? What things are Winning Willie By Daylight?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 016 ~Will Find FINE Princesses~

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It’s amazing what you can do when you don’t want to sleep; last night it was staring into the void until 1:00 AM, tonight it was 5,000 words, so I’m less than 10,000 away from the finish line but on being a good man. Will Find FINE Princesses

Wednesday, July 17, 2019

Log 016 ~Will Find FINE Princesses~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Millionaire right now, and inappropriate dammit. In full transparency, I don’t even know if they meant me, but I will take “The L” at his word. I wasn’t even thinking with “the D” last night, but more like Disney and Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. So what was my grand sin before bed? Once upon a time, I saw a beautiful woman from “It’s A Southern Thing” dressed as Snow White. I penned a small poem or whatever using the seven dwarfs names:

“I’m HAPPY seeing you, GRUMPY you’re taken, SLEEPY dreaming of you, DOPEY I know, a bit BASHFUL letting it all out, but SNEEZY never I like the outdoors, but I do need a DOC for my lovestruck heart ❤️”

Now “The L” liked this comment. So minutes later, I read, “Some people should keep their inappropriate thoughts to themselves 😮.” Now am I mistaken; perhaps, I know I didn’t get to sleep until 1:00 AM. Scared I’d get blocked, terrified I’m wrong for some reason. I didn’t eat dinner; I stopped playing TWD. Inspector Echo I will punish myself when I feel I’ve done wrong and again I doubt myself. Do you remember I spent one night deleting everything from one page because of one person? I don’t check Whisper replies anymore. I spend maybe an hour deleting fake friend requests and blocking chats. If you joke you learn to deal with the heckle right? I wasn’t trying to get the girl I thought I was saying something cute. Unlike Trump, I own up to my sins for your consideration.

  1. I Paid A Girl Hundreds To Get Naked. She didn’t like the things she had to say.
  2. I Compared A Girl And Her Friend To Brazzers and Reality Kings Porn Stars
  3. I Sent A Mom A Butterfree Pokémon And Quoted Butterfly By Crazy Town
  4. I Hit My Sister’s Ankle When I Was Only A Child
  5. I Gave A Mom $5.00 At Walmart When She Asked. Thought about “Street Blowjobs”
  6. I Admire Jimmy Stephens For True Teen Babes. I watch Teen Starlet and Honey Cream

I could continue Inspector Echo. I get blocked, ridiculed, sick, all kinds of horny. Do you know I had my ass beat by a man that beats his wife? Why don’t I give up writing anything; Will Find FINE Princesses.

I Will Have No Fear