Tag: Insanity

Lesson 233 ~What’s Worse Than Hate, Indifference~

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I’m a lot of things, to a few I am even a man if not The Man, and those few times I look in the mirror or how I feel, I know it. Only humans can be so annoying, we can be loved and hated but what’s worse hmm? What’s Worse Than Hate, Indifference

Monday, February 19, 2018

Lesson 233 ~What’s Worse Than Hate, Indifference~

Twentieth Rule Madam Justice,

I Am Not Afraid Anymore though time has passed since I was fear itself; when I was in school my slogan was, the best thing to have is love, if not then be liked, at least be respected, barring that be invisible, and if all else fails, be feared. Another day, another school shooting, well a few days ago so maybe I shouldn’t knock hate, at least hatred makes sense or insanity but to just not matter, to cease to be, that’s indifference, that’s Hell.

“You don’t think I’m ordinary?”

“You couldn’t be ordinary if you tried.”

“Thank you. I don’t think there’s anything worse than being ordinary.” American Beauty

Now how can anyone hate words, but “interesting” I find lazy but “whatever,” is the worst just edging out “just kidding” because whatever to me eliminates an idea? Yes I know I’m guilty of using all three but the last time I used all of the above I still talk to the person daily, like, love, and hate can be the most exhausting things ever. What about silence, at work my first amendment rights are being curtailed and telling people that you honestly don’t care, hell I don’t talk to my family and vice versa, but again I am exhausted.

Hating though is one thing, to hate means you once cared, even if it was a Luke Skywalker moment of wanting to kill Kylo Ren, but once there is nothing left to love, hate, or fear, you’re capable of doing the most monstrous of things. Better to feel too much than too little isn’t that what they say and that’s also the problem, people trying to tell each other how to feel. When you do that to someone they feel as though they’re not understood and when they aren’t being heard then what is the point of speaking at all?

Another reason I put such value in words, for someone that hates most people, thank goodness, I do see the importance of communication, as in my dog, but solitude is also a blessing. Hate can destroy but I think it’s the moment that we cease to care, a time when a person is seen not as a human being or less than what they are, and they know speaking, crying, screaming won’t help they are made indifferent and notably dangerous.

“Can’t even shout.
Can’t even cry.
The Gentlemen are coming by.
Looking in windows,
knocking on doors…
They need to take seven
and they might take yours…
Can’t call to mom.
Can’t say a word.
You’re gonna die screaming,
but you won’t be heard.” Hush

So love if you can, like, respect, and if somebody chooses to be invisible, take it as a blessing, because the moment everything is lost including hate, there is but indifference, and the return of fear and goodness knows I hate, lust, I feel shame. What’s Worse Than Hate, Indifference

“If you ever loved me, don’t rob me of my hate. It’s all I have.” The Count of Monte Cristo

I Will Have No Fear

Bed… It’s Not For Sleeping

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I never got bedtime stories and with how my parents were… well if I were getting ready to go to sleep this would honestly keep me up and for all the right reasons believe me. “Bed… It’s Not For Sleeping”

With “Brutal Bedtime Stories: A Supernatural Horror Story Collection” it’s for hiding underneath the covers, it’s for finding a playmate, and it’s for reading until the sun comes up because you won’t be getting any sleep. Is the book that scary or so good, I’ll give you a hint, it’s excellent, but of course, I’m all sorts of twisted indeed.

These are the types of stories I wish I knew at bedtime… who hurt you; that’s not the only past I see, these stories make me all nostalgic for The Twilight Zone because I could see any of these made into an episode without a doubt. It isn’t something that I honestly set out to find receiving a free copy, and so I wonder what Tobias Wade thinks about me, hell the question is how do I consider him and the other writers of this work. Do you have any more, that’s the question I kept thinking with every story, what else you got hmm, is it worse than this?

I mean that in the best possible way, going from story to story, saying this is my favorite, no this, maybe this and as far as my actual love and the best overall, I wish us all luck with this review. Now again, personally I wasn’t frightened, everything but that, I could say apprehensive about a story here or there, turned on, mad, twisted, even queasy at points but not scared. Brutal Bedtime Stories is a book for the person that imagines the world inside their head is Hell; it’s nice to know you aren’t alone in this universe thankfully.

Sometimes I look at my work, and it’s like, this is child’s play… can’t remember any killer dolls in these stories though, for the most part wholly original and relatable if you’re studying Psychopath 101. Hopefully, I’m not boring anyone so far and if I am, go ahead and read this title now with my blessing, it will keep your eyes open for some time.

Your bed is for wondering where the real monsters are, underneath it, hiding in the closet or inside you all along, that’s the problem too many monsters and not enough people to haunt; a problem for this book, just way too many good ideas perhaps?

We begin with David Maloney, and his first story should start with a warning that you’re about to be sucked into this universe, from the get-go I was hooked and impressed, wow. Excuse me for trying to narrow down my top picks but if I go author by author with his work it would be between “She Says the Smell of Death Turns Her On” and “The Blue-Eyed Painting.” Already you know which stories I’m into if you read my reviews often enough but his collection contained a few twisted happy endings as I recall.

Tobias Wade had some weird family stories, some I wanted to see continued into even more extended versions of themselves, while every story makes you think, you want to go deeper. His first entry “Hell is Heaven to the Demons” that would honestly be my sort of afterlife, and if it becomes a full-blown novel wow, just the idea of coming back reminds me some of the Shusaku, Isaku, Kisaku series if that makes sense.

With Ha-yong Glenn Bak we get some more family dynamics but also the businessman of the group seeing as how plenty of his stories are about making money. “Make Money or Die Trying” is his first entry but we also have “A Site Called “Cash For Confessions” and “An App Called “Time is Money” also murder seems to run in the family with his tales.

Last but not least we have Kyle Alexander, the only one to give a character his name and while “Teenagers” was the last story and the longest, I much preferred “Shooting Stars” in its simplicity, scary it resonated with me. Sci-Fi fans though will get a kick out of Teenagers, not saying it was terrible but somewhat anti-climatic though it bit surprising for the end.

Put all these stories together you have an incredible combination, and they say, no man stands alone, but any one of these given their book could win me over overall.

Five stars without a second thought, from beginning to end it was like a rollercoaster of madness and mayhem and what are beds meant for, to be tied up in, sexy or lunatics, I have to wonder did these guys meet in an asylum. I can’t promise “no spoilers” or no bad times but this book what else can I say about it just saying.

I’m no doctor, but David Maloney has some ideas about sex both good and bad, but most have the villain getting his so he knows right from wrong. Tobias was all madness and death, if you’re sick of zombies he’s the guy to call, he has a refreshing outlook on ghosts, but maybe he’s not the family man just saying. Along with David, Ha-yong Glenn Bak is the one I most related to, sex and money it has to be between those two, and no offense but Kyle was the weak link, or maybe he was the one chosen for the cooling off period, to a certain degree I think.

Sad to say but it might be all downhill after the first series with David Maloney, and I don’t mean that to sound wrong, but he was the most original with Ha-yong after “Make Money or Die Trying” you see where his stories go, maybe it’s right, sex sells. If there is anything to complain about, it could be that I didn’t exactly know how to read this book, front to back of course but the stories blended together and as soon as you start the next you already forget the other. It only took me seconds upon reading each title to recall, but as I’ve been trying to do this whole time if one story stands out well two, She Says the Smell of Death Turns Her On and Make Money or Die Trying.

If you’re squeamish or have never thought about killing the person next to you, maybe this won’t be your book of choice but if you’re human than feel free. Now if you’ll excuse me this has been my confession, and now I need to find me sort cute girl turned on by death because truthfully Bed… It’s Not For Sleeping.

Lesson 095 ~Wanna Meet A Ghost~

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Why do people believe in ghosts, God, and I suppose guns help with both but I’m not being political here, I just really saw a ghost. Wanna Meet A Ghost, trust me you’re not prepared and I surely wasn’t so why would you believe me right

Wednesday, October 4, 2017

Lesson 095 ~Wanna Meet A Ghost~

Hey Lady Lu
No Fear and I was never one to build a snowman but I am one to meet a ghost or so I thought I did today or at least I saw one.

Would you truly like to know how to figure out you’re alive… you’re the one being haunted, you feel fear, and it’s rare for zombies to eat their own; yeah we’ll come back to that sooner or later. You feel your heart race, your blood runs cold, and then there is the good old flight or fight response, but I took a path more like Tom Petty, I swear I’m on a death kick really. Haven’t we all been Lady Lu, why is it that we only truly appreciate life so near death, I mean have I been eager to die… I know the euphoria of a failed suicide attempt after I’m not puking green for most of the day.

Anyway so about this ghost, Scrooge will be the first one to tell you that ghost aren’t exactly ones for manners, hell I could even convince myself maybe I didn’t see anyone at all but I know I did. What would I have said, the good news is I’ve pretty much forgotten what was scaring me so and then boom, a sign that I was a bad man, best not to dwell on it right?

I never pictured myself as a ghost and you know my views on reincarnation but I feel like one of those villains in “Ghost” except all I want to do is survive. Again this is true of all of us, look at you Luna at least I can hear you and I didn’t have to die, sounding crazy but that’s pretty relative in this day and age. Does one even have to die to be a ghost, every moment, every decision, every day we are born again, trying to become better than we were yesterday and that never just goes away, we are haunted by the people we were, are, and could be and so we learn to live again.

Free speech for the living, dead men tell no tales

So what have I learned today, more like another question should I open my eyes and listen, didn’t help in “Pulse”, should I run, I stood my ground today but who knows what tomorrow will bring, Wanna Meet A Ghost?

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 050 ~A Comedian Died Today~

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Bad days and a Mad Season, the sun isn’t helping, if this happened tomorrow I might actually say it was something astrological but no just people being people and me being me and we all need to stop. “A Comedian Died Today” then again?

Sunday, August 20, 2017

Lesson 050 ~A Comedian Died Today~

Hey Lady Lu,
No Fear, I Will Have No Fear, You Are Not A Caveman, Now The Work Can Begin, yes it lacks the zing of the motto from “1984” but consider them part of my new philosophy on life. Speaking of life, “Marquis de Joker” is not dead but that smiling, scared idiot, that I was today surely should be, again who am I angrier at, myself or the General Manager, freaking “Big Brother”.

“War is peace.
Freedom is slavery.
Ignorance is strength.”
― Winston Smith, George Orwell, 1984

I’m a dominant Lu but today all I can think about is being punished for my fear; I remember when I was a boy in school when you got into trouble they would make you write sentences a few hundred times. How else can I do it, drugs have been hit and miss with me and they don’t solve the real problem, I have to fight this fear on my own. What do I have to be afraid of My Lady, tell me, what do I have to do to be rid of it; I swear I’m trying, but when the moment comes what happens…

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” Marianne Williamson

Am I now… I am no one for faith but I want to be as Morpheus said “truthfully unafraid” and I didn’t feel any of that today, I allowed myself to feel inferior and weak, who needs white supremacy when I do this to myself all the time. I was disappointed with myself because of two stupid men… well one of them was me and the other was “Big Brother”; I’d say I can’t wait until our next huddle but for what, so I can shrink away and just become more insane. Fear paralyzes you, Luna, I see it, I feel it, I can’t move, I can’t think, and in the eyes of everyone you just shrink, but more over I was stuck.

“You are not stuck” Ezekiel

I think I finally see what one of my coworkers was saying, I’m always running, isn’t that a bit of a contradiction, I feel stuck but then again I must learn to stand and fight. Yes, I said fight, not with fists yet… but with every breath, every word, every look, which leads me to my next new rule Luna.

“Now I bet you niggas do think y’all white. College don’t mean shit. Y’all niggas and you gonna be niggas forever… just like us. Niggas.

You’re not niggas.” School Daze

You are not a caveman, you are not inferior, you have a voice so goddammit use it, and if that means going completely Newspeak on your vocabulary then so be it because you are not so clown. Yet another reason I’m not losing the pen name because I think I’m hilarious, what was I thinking today, if we had a huddle “I have little patience for people and no patience for stupid people” how’s that?

“To say “I love you” one must know first how to say the “I”.”
― Ayn Rand, The Fountainhead

I am better than the man I was today, without a doubt, I may think all those people at work are stupid but at the end of the day this is about me, how I want to be and while I’m finding so much power in that word how about words I shouldn’t say any more. Hey, Sup, anything that’s not even a word at all just a grunt, and while silence beats stupidity I have a voice, my voice and I could barely hear myself. What about the laughter… I explained once before how I got the name Marquis de Joker because the truth and a joke are synonymous.

“When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things.” 1 Corinthians 13:11

This is some truth for you, again a contradiction, you know my fandoms but part of the reason I behave as such is that maybe I still think of myself as a child with no place, what is a child’s word worth? People get drunk, get high, I remember a few trips to the dentist office where I would say whatever and not think about it, we are so much like children that people can laugh at the truths we speak, or in my case, I laugh before to keep from saying them. It’s like a virus, “Indiana Gone” laughs all the time and I can understand why but the thing is a man has to be a man, and I should be.

This morning started out with such promise, and then I left the cave, no I didn’t I carried it with me, I allowed myself to be thought of as a child, to behave as a child, to be disappointed in myself because I gave a rat’s ass, what Big Brother thought of me. A caveman goes out and does what must be done but that’s survival, not living, not evolution.
“I can shoot the wings off the back of the fly!
I’m ready!” Wanted (2008)

Now the work can begin, that’s evolution, that’s courage, manhood, fearlessness but I still have my day job but I almost did it. I was thinking about all the things I wanted to tell you Lu and my boss came in and I had one word written down, do you know what it was… “I” all I needed to add was “Quit” and there’s freedom.

That man, that ass clown asked me, when I didn’t jump at his offer for more hours, did I have another job, what else did I have to do and do you know what I said? “I gotta see about a girl” would have been nice don’t you think, “Good Will Hunting” and all that again I have to learn how to do that thinking in real time. No, I told him, I’m trying to write, does that make me a writer, am I a writer now, wouldn’t be the first time I crossed swords with someone over my budding career.

It only got worse from there when I confused “stop on a dime” and “on the fly” thanks to my social anxiety, you know what helps with that, being mad as hell, one of the reasons I like the Dark Side of The Force, fear, and anger right? If that’s what it takes Luna, I told Indiana Gone that too, at least with my anger, I know exactly where I stand the only thing now is to turn it, less at me and more for them, haven’t we talked about my temper and my hate? I’m the one who’s dying though and today more than ever showed that while that sniveling, shit for brains I was this morning deserves it, “I’M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I’M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!” Network

“Once more into the breach, my friends, once more. We’ll close the wall with our dead. In peace, nothing so becomes a man as modesty and humility, but when the blast of war blows in our ears, then imitate the action of the tiger, summon up the blood, disguise fair nature with rage and lend the eye a terrible aspect.” Kevin Costner, The Postman (1997)

So what have I learned today, that maybe I needed my ass kicked, maybe I needed this humiliation, I need people like “Miss Seasons”, Big Brother, a host of others to laugh and snicker, to reject, to criticize, to ridicule, I need all that noise to truly start and hear myself, heal myself. I Will Have No Fear, You Are Not A Caveman, Now The Work Can Begin, I don’t mean this to be funny anymore, because didn’t you hear Lu, A Comedian Died Today.

I Will Have No Fear
You Are Not A Caveman
Now The Work Can Begin

 

Retaining Reinvention

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Since I have the tendency to talk to myself *ahem* “I didn’t want you to remember I want you to forget” as if I could be as bad as Kruger though I try. Retaining Reinvention… as many times as I have tried to be someone else, I don’t know who I am anymore.

Retaining
Memories of boos
And shoos
Yet I’m staying
For want of saying
The truth
Of course, you knew
No need explaining

Like I could mention
Who I am
Don’t understand
My reinvention
If only I could see
Who I want to be

Copyright © 2011, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Lesson 005 ~Freezing with Embarrassment~

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Was the sin I committed ever so great that I must fall further still, I burned and now I freeze because of it; humiliation is not new at all. “Freezing with Embarrassment”, now I don’t suppose any weatherman can help me with that.

Thursday, July 6, 2017

Lesson 005 ~Freezing with Embarrassment~

“Can you blush?” Blade II

Lu,
Let’s chalk that up to one of those things I’ll never be able to do, though I’ve tried and yes stupid people have noticed. Now I’ve been talking about a burning in blood as of late but today’s lesson will be on, guess what… humiliation.

I’ve been told I wear my heart on my sleeve and we both know I tend to take things to seriously which leads to a lot of resentment and plenty of anger. Trust me I have plenty of fuel to burn but while I was at work today “it” happened again. The “it” when for a moment in time I freeze, I remember, and it takes me a minute or so to fight back the feeling, my version of a panic attack I suppose Luna.

The last panic attack I recall… somewhere between when I worked for the “red shirts” and when I met an online friend in real life; the shaking, the breathing, the experience of the whole world falling apart but it’s just me crumbling at the time clock or the box office. Only that’s not the real Hell and we will be getting to one of my “Dante’s Inferno” rants, I have still sworn off the second circle for a while. What I thought about today is that it’s not the burning that gets to me but the being frozen in place and time, that wrecks me.

No, it doesn’t, it keeps me, that’s the worst part about it, you see a wreck, hitting rock bottom would be the end, and I’ve talked about being destroyed before. It’s the after, that might be more problematic than the event itself, the aftermath.

I’ve heard the saying that everything you want lies on the other side of fear, so you walk through Hell, you burn but I’ve never experienced that sense of relief that freedom of yeah I’ve done it and I’m finally okay.

Take for example today, well I mowed the yard maybe a week ago right, I think “okay the neighbors won’t yell” they never have but anyway I get back to the house today and boom two big anthills, one center of the yard, another half into the neighbors. So I rush out and put some ant killer stuff on the yard right, problem solved but no I’m stuck on how long have those anthills been out there, did the neighbors see, what if the stuff doesn’t work, did I use it wrong, was it the wrong stuff etc. Talk about building a mountain out of a molehill or anthill in this case honestly.

You didn’t think I was going to go a day without talking about the incident right, just more proof that I’m stuck here, will I apologize again, will I hate, been ignoring her and most mutual people on Facebook. Do they know who I really am, what do they think about me, will I ever comment again, will I ever shut up?

What about when I was at work today, first I said I got stuck in my moment and usually when I’m there I either kick a hole in a box or stomp my foot really hard like I’m stomping on the devil, stupid religious background. Anyway, I get asked to deliver the jewelry p to the front, a simple enough task, except I don’t know where they want the cart, not to mention some of the boxes were mixed, hats and things, general vicinity but not exactly jewelry. Besides that, and the stupid pillows, so much for any thoughts of walking tall but I try, Lady Lu, I really try but it’s almost like this person I am is set in stone, like any headstone.

That’s my whole point, it’s as if I’m already dead in a way, another reason I stomp the ground, maybe I’m trying to get myself out of the ground but I keep falling back into it, frozen in place or just trudging my way through the snow, however, I can.

Seems dumb to be talking about snow here… the actual weather matches my mood, either a torrential storm or burning hot. You know that’s how my father does it, hate that I’m giving him any props but that’s how he gets by, he hates the whole damn world and everyone in the end just kowtows.

I go back and forth with this hating people thing and why I have bad thoughts, I guess though I have a sliver of hope left for humanity. I prefer the higher circles but, anxiety, shame, rage, all drive me down lower, they burn me but the lowest circle of Hell is encased in ice. The greatest sin is Treachery and this I truly believe and either I or my anxiety is guilty of such a sin dear Lady Ly.

In is defined as a violation of faith; betrayal of trust, treason, perfidy, faithlessness, but am I the betrayer or have I been betrayed… to be honest, both. I don’t betray other people, okay I mean if they came at me first but I do betray myself every single day, and then some and here I wonder why I don’t get anywhere. The more I warm to someone and here I am again and the only way to recover is to burn with rage, none of this is doing any good. So I sit here stuck, taking it step by step, remembering every stupid thing I’ve done and trying to move past it but being hit with it yet again.

So what have I learned… I don’t want to be my father, I told a friend I don’t want to be angry all the time but I heard in a movie once, I’ll keep my rage and bitterness because at least I know they’re true. I don’t want to be frozen, I don’t want to be stuck, frightened, fighting to keep my head up and staying out of the ground but I’m freezing with embarrassment.

“Fear is not real. The only place that fear can exist is in our thoughts of the future. It is a product of our imagination, causing us to fear things that do not at present and may not ever exist.” Cypher Raige – After Earth (2013)

Lesson 004 ~Embrace The Madness~

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Driven crazy before, been there and done that, it seems I have lost my way again but at least I’m moving now, though there is no destination. Embrace The Madness, maybe not all of it but anger is a hell of a navigator I think

Wednesday, July 5, 2017

Lesson 004 ~Embrace The Madness~

Lu,
To be fair on any given day I’m pretty out there, crazy, insane, eccentric, and yes even “skeeve” I cannot tell you how much I hate that word. Is it really the word though or just who I associate with it and for once I’m not talking about myself now.

Okay so what are we doing here if not talking about myself right but am I over the incident, you know I have the tendency to blow thing way out of proportion. I think it comes with the whole bipolar territory but haven’t gotten around to talking to another “real” therapist as of late, like the last two or three maybe more were any help. Besides you listen to me for free and I don’t have to flush my medication down the toilet though I’ve been thinking about that stuff I bought from Amazon right.

“Anger is more useful than despair.” Arnold Schwarzenegger – Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines

That’s where I’ve been lately, lost in despair but if I haven’t made this clear, it seems I’m getting madder and madder, talk about watching the world burn, I’m burning up but at least for the moment, I’m not destroying my work. Talk about the five stages of grief, I was never in denial, there was nothing to deny, I confessed, I apologized, hell I wish she would post more stuff to cover my stupidity or just erase it herself. There is nothing to deny and for a couple of days there I skipped straight to depression, nothing to bargain for and like I said anger is not acceptable either.

Only I am angry and instead of being sorry for the first time I’m actually pretty grateful to be this upset because it has done something my previous sin could not. I’m here aren’t I, I’m writing blowing off friends a bit to get this done to let this out, though I wouldn’t say that it’s necessarily helping at all.

Is that what I want… help, no Lady Lu, was this some sort of a wake-up call, perhaps a call to arms, well mine might fall off with all this writing I have been doing lately. That night when we got back to talking I thought I wanted to drop dead, maybe I did and this is Hell which explains the fire burning inside me.

“All I know is that first, you’ve got to get mad. You’ve got to say, ‘I’m a HUMAN BEING, God damn it! My life has VALUE!’ So I want you to get up now. I want all of you to get up out of your chairs. I want you to get up right now and go to the window. Open it, and stick your head out, and yell, ‘I’M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I’M NOT GOING TO TAKE THIS ANYMORE!’ I want you to get up right now, sit up, go to your windows, open them and stick your head out and yell – ‘I’m as mad as hell and I’m not going to take this anymore!’ Things have got to change. But first, you’ve gotta get mad!… You’ve got to say, ‘I’m as mad as hell, and I’m not going to take this anymore!” Howard Beale, Network (1976)

See now I’m starting to get mad at myself all over because was I treating her like a human being instead of a… well there are so many things I want to say but I’m having a Ned Flanders crisis of conscience still. It wasn’t that serious, I don’t think but again it comes with my usual state of mind, whoever I am given the moment. For the record, I like to think I’m the perfect gentlemen and I do respect women, equal pay, equal rights, and everything in-between though I would never prescribe to all the ideology of feminism.

What about who I am though, I’m perfectly acceptable as long as I’m quite and dependable, aren’t I or is that scary too, is that wrong. You know I went for days without speaking to anyone at work and I’m the bad guy, people can say whatever they want, speak for me and I’m the bad guy. Back in school, I was the flowers and candies guy, I was the one the jerks came to for pretty words so they could get back with their girls but I was pretty much playing Cyrano de Bergerac.

Was I done with the apologies, I’m sorry if this sounds all too familiar Lu, same stuff different day but that just goes to show that things never change. Except for now usually, a pretty face would make me do all sorts of stupid things in the name of “attraction” now I’m up and about it the name of war.

Okay dialing it back but I’m writing now because of that anger, but let’s talk business, you know that Mime poem I wrote gave me my biggest rush of likes, the poem about almost getting fired seriously. Didn’t I tell you destruction is beautiful and since I’ve stopped with the other stuff, not a day goes by without a like.

So I’m embracing the madness, a business decision, you tell me, but for a few more days at least I’m going to let this anger wash over me, fuel to my fire. There are two emotions that guide me in this world and one of them ain’t joy and for the moment the fifth circle holds its sway. Only another reason that I’m mad at myself is the fact that it would take something like this to inspire me to work so hard once again.

I think I may have gotten it wrong as I do most things, so why not embrace the madness and the terror, and hopefully not the utter disgust. Physically I’ve been feeling better though I do have lingering worries, some pain actually serves a greater purpose. Note I said some not all but I will thank her for the pain she gave me because yes it has made me stronger.

No I shouldn’t say that but I do know I want to finish my book, I want to make my blog something if anything just to show her up, success is striking back isn’t it.

“The only way to survive a mad world is to embrace the madness.” Victor Strand
The lesson for today is let myself go crazy, work my ass off, ignore pretty brunettes, yes Embrace The Madness.

Love a Little Sooner

WillLeave a comment

You just don’t know how some things are going to end and others you hope they never do. I don’t when I started to believe I would find love first and I still do but some say, nice guys finish last take that however you like. Love a Little Sooner

See Me Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HmsPhSlhKbQ

So let the stars be lost in your eyes
Let them return in sweet agony
for an angel has forgotten how to fly
I know you don’t love gravity
but good luck with shooting the moon

Only you… somehow
Without buttons, zippers, panties, dress
all of me comes up or paradise falls down
Lose your wings in such a pretty mess
Love makes us loons

Is this love after all
Three little words I can’t let drop
as I’m enjoying the fall
“Please don’t stop”
Your words are my favorite tune

and I will never ask you when or where too
Of course it is a sin
to love me like you do
You’ll be on your way back again
Will you leave me marooned?

When you do say something
“I’m coming!!!”
My love… make it soon

Copyright © 2015 Second Circle Creations, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Inspired By: ???, OK Go “Shooting The Moon”, Yazoo “Only You”, John Legend “All Of Me”, Vanity “Pretty Mess”, Whitesnake “Is This Love”, Jamie Kennedy and Stu Stone “Circle Circle Dot Dot”, Ellie Goulding “Love Me Like You Do” Fifty Shades of Grey Soundtrack, A Great Big World ft. Christina Aguilera “Say Something”, Sia “My Love” and Oleta Adams “Get Here”