Tag: Signs

Saga 044 ~You’ll B My Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I’ve cried a bit and wanted to vomit. Virgil’s cried once and has hacked anytime I’ve touched him. We didn’t eat dinner, and both of us got fences up. Well, one is blocking the stairs. He’s yet to approach mine. How’d Dante do it? You’ll B My Virgil.

Sunday, August 14, 2022

Saga 044 ~You’ll B My Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and you? Well, what are you, not exactly a father or a friend? Fuck-up? A dog owner?

Now let’s be clear, considering this is something I did yesterday. So yeah, this is my fault. And you’re living with the consequences of my actions. Literally! A dog is living in the next room, scared to death. You’re in the same state. I owe you a huge apology even after I said this yesterday:

“Dogs aren’t things… One of them could be my best friend, a reason, a second born. I doubt I’ll find them today, Lady Lunalesca, but there’s always a chance. Except that I have no money. I haven’t been this scared in a long time.” Saga 043 ~Go Big Or B~

Here I go spending $150 on a Chihuahua mix. Sweet Buttery Jesus, what have I done? Not Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE Finishing Until we Meet Again
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE Finishing Gulp Off To Be Published
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE Keeping It In My Pants (Day 017 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 024 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

I read these things every single week, as you will and what happens? Nothing! Now I want to go all Jennifer Lawrence, a.k.a. Tiffany Maxwell screaming, “but if it’s me reading the signs!” That’s what I did in my head at PetSmart yesterday while texting Braxton’s Aunt. First, there were the colors. I had a thought that said Braxton couldn’t make this more black and white for me. And Virgil has flecks of brown around his face that got to me, ha. Now I’m no numerology expert but let’s do the math. Virgil is one year and six months. That’s 545 days, give or take. B III died on January 31, 2021, 13 days from his 16th birthday. Meaning Virgil’s Birthday… Monday, February 15, 2021. Oh, and Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE Finishing, Still To Be Determined
  2. I WILL BE Finishing Gathering, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE Finishing Gulp Off To Be Published
  4. I WILL BE Keeping It In My Pants (Day 024 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Speaking of the impossible. You haven’t had Virgil a full 24. You’re still trying to convince yourself. Ok, reincarnation, 15 days. Braxton was 15 years old. Is this a coincidence? Braxton had a heart murmur; Virgil’s been treated for having heartworms. Braxton wasn’t eating or drinking at the end; I have not seen Virgil eat or drink anything since he arrived. He’s been quiet, laying on Braxton’s pillow. Note; he’s going to need a bed and a collar. I couldn’t get his harness back on, and the collar they gave was too small. Taking him outside, I used B’s oldest one. Fit like a glove, but sacrilege, if anything. And you just want to cry and possibly vomit. But he’s here. You’ll B My Virgil.

560 Days Without B III, Day 001 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Chronicle 135 ~To B A Believer~

WillLeave a comment

“Comedy comes in 3’s.” I’ve read that it’s a writer’s rule, but when’s the last time I’ve believed anything other writers have said… like being good. The last one I believed in died 286 Days ago. I believe bad things always come. To B A Believer

Saturday, November 13, 2021

Chronicle 135 ~To B A Believer~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so what do I believe in? I should start listening to my motivations again with NaNoWriMo.

Speaking of which, as I told Lady Sophia last night. I believe I was making such huge strides in “Behave In The Cherry Patch” until yesterday and, of course, today. If I’m lucky, ha-ha. By Sunday, I can stop lying to NaNoWriMo for at least a little while this week… Lady Lu, I should tell this weak man that I am. How many weeks has it been now that I’ve betrayed B III? Died on January 31, was cremated on February 4, and I picked up his ashes on February 10. Three days Lady Luna. I heard somewhere comedy comes in threes. I’m not sure I believe that, but wouldn’t it be something if Chase was at Petsmart today? This would be Week 3. To be Lucky or a Loser

Of course, I mean that about me, Lady Lu, and not little Virgil. Hell, I can’t believe I would adopt him now. As I couldn’t believe what my “father” said to me the day that Braxton died. Of all the pain I’ve felt in my life, I can’t believe anything could hurt this much, Lu. You’re looking at a guy who has starved himself on purpose. With this week, I’ve been starving by accident, Lu. With all I survived with last night, I did take care of one problem. The next on my plate, or rather not in my glass, is dehydration. Water, Mother’s milk… Yeah, I’m about out of both unless I want to start drinking out the sink. Drool some over Cherry’s Yabbos?

I believe I always have time to, as they say, hang out with my wang out, rock out with my cock out, get silly with my willy. I should be careful, Lady Lu. It’s that kind of language which cost me a friend on Facebook a few days ago. After losing B, who cares, Lunalesca? The hackers? I did pass the rest of the night in relative peace. Not a peep has been heard this morning but wasn’t that the calm before the storm. I go out to live, and, next thing I know, I’m fighting for my life both IRL and online. And with this coming week. Life sucks; I believe that more than ever before. I believe in Braxton. To B A Believer.

286 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Chronicle 128 ~B Aching My Heart~

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For the third time in 279 Days, I was offered a dog. My sister showed me a dog only days after B III died. A woman on Facebook told me about a Chihuahua. And today, for a second week at PetSmart, these ladies asked me about Chase. “B Aching My Heart”

Saturday, November 6, 2021

Chronicle 128 ~B Aching My Heart~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but I can still be petty as all Hell. I can still hate the world, right.

On the 30th, Lady Lu I was embarrassed, enamored, and enraged from going to PetSmart. Embarrassed as I offered my number and email. The lady asks, “for what?” I’m stupid. Enamored with a dog named Chase that I would never see again. I’ll get to him in a sec Lu. Enraged at the lady there, myself. COVID 19 is nothing with people’s stupidity Lady Lu. There are two places on Earth this second where everyone knows my name. Well knows me, at least. Talk to my “father’s” old work buddies sometime. Tony has a son? Anyway, so I walk into PetSmart today, and these women are all around me. “We have Chase. He’s not here, but we can bring him, just say the word.” YES

NO Lunalesca, the answer has to be no, and it breaks my heart. That’s why I go to PetSmart every Saturday, I think. To tell me that it’s still there to be broken, not fixed. I don’t deserve it, Lady Lu, I mean to know, what peace? Hell, I’m breaking the bank, my balls, my book but this incessant heart of mine beating remains. But B III doesn’t hear it. I’ve talked about getting messages. The power flipped out for a second, and his picture frame flashed. B’s stuff on the floor, how his treats lie undisturbed. But nothing Saturday. Well, I take that back. Remember how I talked about the bank? With my budget, I bought a book for a buck, “This Dog’s Afterlife.”

Coincidence, you think? Braxton is a hard habit to break, and I don’t plan on it anytime soon. I told M Anime that she makes it difficult for men to date her. Getting close, nope? I’m doing the same thing when it comes to fur-babies. My Day Job, as always, sucks. Say the magic words “Humiliations Galore.” I’ve been chasing one chick’s Yabbos for weeks now. It’s a good thing God gave Adam a woman and not a dog. I’ve got neither, but which did more damage? Ahh, yes, bring on the waterworks Day 279. So with all the things wrong with me, what should worry me, Luna? I wish it was NaNoWriMo; I’m lying. The truth is worse. Braxton’s Dead, B Aching My Heart

279 Days Without B III

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will