Tag: Writing

Log 044 ~The Shape Of Will~

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Last week I spoke a bit of looking down, and it seems like I’m still doing that, whether it be my phone, naughty books, or my wallet; hip to be square or more like a rectangle, not the worse of all shapes though. The Shape Of Will

Wednesday, August 14, 2019

Log 044 ~The Shape Of Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Millionaire right now, but not a star. Can’t say I miss Super Mario because my princess is always in another castle. There’s also the fact that I’m not feeling powerful. Where was I supposed to be at this moment in my life? Now if anything I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop. Should I apologize for ripping my heart out? I’ve been much too busy looking “down there” at the moment. At least it’s still in my pants, but it’s getting hard and pretty damn embarrassing; okay stopping.

Let’s get to what has me bent out of shape. Video games should be fun and a way to relax, right. I like Heavy Rain and all, but yes I’m out of practice and out of shape. Shaking that controller this way, and that has me breathing hard. At least it’s better than watching other people play. So what about watching other people fuck (LANGUAGE)? The first week is always the hardest, like any rehab. Still NoFap but not even hiding the fact that I’m watching porn. Hell Inspector Echo I wasn’t lasting three days when I was abstaining or trying at least. As for the “real” thing, I didn’t cave into the cosplayer. I’m still waiting to hear from Alice. I even started looking for a new “maid,” talk about a business opportunity SIGH.

As the song goes, it’s hip to be square. Only again, Heavy Rain isn’t helping; I saw Madison’s boobs. I’m reading another Tillie Cole book, “Raphael.” Should have learned from “Sick Fux” the author loves the taboo. Now If I could only go back to the nights of softcore porn watching. Inspector Echo, my life’s a cycle, a circle if you will; wake up, conversation, pretend to live. My son and I are in a rut. These are his golden years he should be enjoying himself. I keep saying I’ll give him everything but a million dollars in two weeks? Yes, I am ashamed of myself, there’s no way around it Inspector Echo. Could it be a love triangle? Yes, Tupac got around but as for myself. From the MILF to Mr. International, to the Stars. Yesterday I even went back to some erotic gaming.

So I am sorry life has me so warped and twisted. These past two weeks have been, again hard. I’m finding The Shape Of Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 037 ~Standing With A Willie~

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A great man once sang “stand up for your rights,” and someone else said if you won’t stand for something; well these two legs can take me places but my eyes are looking down, though things get an inevitable rise out of me. Standing With A Willie

Wednesday, August 7, 2019

Log 037 ~Standing With A Willie~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Millionaire right now, and no my mind isn’t in the gutter. Okay, truth be told another cosplayer “Jada Jinxx.” We’ll get to the begging portion of the program soon enough. Today I want to talk about courage, the strength to stand. Hard when you can’t stand the man in the mirror; neither can they.

Up against the wall mother; yes, I looked that up. That’s how I was at work today, nowhere to go and nothing to do there. So I redid two of the walls of hanging crap, paintings, metal décor, etc. Staring at the wall meant I didn’t have to look at people. Not that I could even if I wanted to anyway. My eyes are conscientious objectors in this war for my life. On the other hand, they could be living in 3017. That’s me looking at the dirt or how long it would take me to find courage. Is it any wonder I write dystopias? How about the only life after death, I believe in is zombies? Anyway, so I’m working from one wall to the next. I’m getting all these backstabbers complimenting behind my back. Like I’m any better; should have seen me yesterday. Someone knocked on my door, and I had my knife behind me, saving people time.

You know for finding reasons to fire me at some point. In writing Inspector Echo, I’m an army of one. Army, again look at the title. I was channeling Ellie Goulding’s song. I wish I could say I had someone I counted on with all my heart. Yes of course B III but let’s look at humans. My “father” that’s more predatory dominance. I feel like less of a real man, depending on him. There, of course, is the job I despise. If I lose it, I’ll be wandering the desert with my dick in my hands (LANGUAGE). So yes this morning, the man in the mirror, well the shower SIGH. I’m still with NO FAP but the things I was thinking. There, now we can talk about the new girl or the others rolling around in my brain. Closing my eyes but still staring at a wall or the floor, Let’s say TWD is chock full of hot women.

Damn all these beautiful girls as the song goes, oh and work. Missed a huddle but Standing With A Willie.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 030 ~Four On Will’s Fairway~

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Last week I talked about counting on me, and today it’s been hours at work, seven new Pinterest boards I believe, and I didn’t even broach the subject of a million dollars in one month, still not published. Four On Will’s Fairway.

Wednesday, July 31, 2019

Log 030 ~Four On Will’s Fairway~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Millionaire right now, and like Eric Thomas, I don’t play golf. Here I was expecting four days off when I have six. Sticking with the four though, I won’t tell you the story of “The Big D,” SIGH. For the record that was the first time, I fell in love. It’s why once upon a time Four was a lucky number as in Group 4. Should I tell you about Group Five Photosports; hell I wish. Yeah, I already broke down again. Fear The Walking Dead fantasies plus Kneeling Kinkster Kennedy. Let’s also add Kosame Dash: Letting It Air Out “Public Pickups” and some Angie Varona for good measure.

Never thought about it before but is that why I’m partial to the numbers three and five? You must forgive my scatterbrain, hell I’m going to need it over the next few days. For now, only one thing has been on my mind, and that’s walking out. I told “Cherry” a bit of this, but I got asked to come in today at the Day Job. Low and behold the first question out of the Manager’s mouth is “what are you doing today?” Dammit, Inspector Echo (LANGUAGE) I’m dominant for a reason. I like what I like; I know what I want. Well, “MILF Dos” might disagree, but I have quite the imagination. Anyway, so I blow up at her and the flower child and leave work thirty minutes early. So of course you know I have to worry this week and the next; it happens. Here’s the worrying list:

One job, one source of income, I can’t get fired.

Two girls I yelled at and two lives to worry about, me and B III

Three tacos from Burger King, they suck, Taco Bell forever

Four women that got me FAPPING again well six actually

Five tasks I did accomplish at the Day Job. Shelves cleaned, Trash, Upstairs hardware, Candles and Avengers display set-up, Stockroom

Only it’s never enough. I always tell myself. Hell, I was so out of it this morning with the fantasy and the madness. I didn’t make the bed, and when I got back hell, I’ve been zoned out. I value myself and my time, but I ate those nasty tacos and played around on Pinterest. 158 Sections on one board.

Forgive me Inspector Echo, like Trump, Four On Will’s Fairway

I Will Have No Fear

Log 028 ~Always Be Prepared For War~

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Last week I talked about people giving orders, but I once heard in a game “a man chooses, a slave obeys” I never chose to be this way, no I was a slave of my looks, my words, my desires things that make me want to fight. Always Be Prepared For War ha

Monday, July 29, 2019

Log 028 ~Always Be Prepared For War~

Ninety-Fifth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, but I am not ready for power. Like today Madam Justice I was not prepared for war. Every day I gird myself for disappointment. I know that my days at the Day Job will bring about more humiliation. Last week was nothing but one fuck-up (LANGUAGE) after another worried about this week. In the morning, I tell myself I’ll wake up early to read, and then I cut my alarm off. I want to fight temptation, and then I have horrific FTWD fantasies. Worst thought I was not down for the cause, again ready for wickedness, winning, for war.

So what brought this on, my C-3PO feelings of being helpless. How do you even define helpless? “Unable to defend oneself or to act without help.” There’s “Uncontrollable,” I think that about covers it Madam Justice. No positive vibes today but I still no better than to wish harm. However, I couldn’t stop three girls from laughing at me. My General Manager continues to treat me like I’m retarded. The usual manager is useless and treats me as a child. Haven’t I mentioned he’s pretty touchy-feely? Weak, Pathetic, Useless, I’m going against all my motivations right now. If it wasn’t that, it was fucking anger (LANGUAGE) today, I wanted to fight no doubt. I tried to march into the GM’s office all day. “Look I’m leaving, I’m not some fucking retard, and not some damn virus” (YES AGAIN). It was like being back in school with both teams saying you take him he’s not wanted.

Is that why I’m taking what’s going on in my country so personally. From metal to a man that controls it, Magneto; I know what it’s like to be shit on for everything (MORE). It’s because you’re black, skinny, fucked up teeth, you wear the same clothes. I know what it’s like to wear a FUBU shirt (youth) and be sitting by yourself the very next day. I see how easy people have it, the laws. Still, because there is work to do people like me are considered ungrateful. Rule 13 states Power Is All That Matters. Like Markus in DBH, (still a great game) if people want to crack jokes and tear me down okay. Use their stones for fortresses, the pen and keyboard are my swords. Hellfire is how my armor’s forged;, they instilled it in the flesh. Always Be Prepared For War.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 023 ~Counting On You Will~

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Hurt oh let me count the ways but shouldn’t I count my blessings, how I hate the church, but those habits die hard, and I sort of feel like I’m dying from my side to my overabundance of sleep. “Counting On You Will”

Wednesday, July 24, 2019

Log 023 ~Counting On You Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Millionaire right now so you would think I could buy a heart. Hell like The Legend of Zelda the truth is I’m living on some. Didn’t Stevie Wonder talk about living enough, yes I know the lyrics. Only I don’t need my “writing resource” penalizing me again. Speaking of which that is what I’m counting up, crimes, slings, and arrows, other pains. For example, I have to report to Brainbuddy again, like rehab, you know. I woke up after a long nap and of course what happens well happened.

So should I blame “Sweet Slurpee Hayden Bell” from Reality Kings? Perhaps one Pinterest board that now has 151 Sections. Yes, I still plan on owning a brothel one day. I wonder how many girls Dennis Hof had on his roster at any one time? Of course, the Milf isn’t helping. Besides those numbers, there’s the list of aliments I’m suffering through today. How many ribs are broken, not for real? I go for days not thinking about my perfect ears but then again? Mornings are getting weird besides being so tired, but of course, I don’t have a schedule. Case and point we’re talking, and I should be reading. I need to drink more water, There’s never enough hours in the day, and my email is going to explode. What about getting my book published again, for Kindle only?

I think the title is an adequate sentiment, “Gulp.” As far as other book titles, the one I finished, “Fangs For Coming” or how about “Faces Only Fangs Could Love?” The blurb still requires more writing than I’m willing to do right now. Anyway, this week haven’t I mention gratitude, being grateful, hell the ideas keep coming. I have more food than I know what to do with Inspector Echo. If anything, I need to eat more or change my diet. The fact that I can is quite a blessing. How about the fact that I can wear jeans at work all the time now? B III has plenty of time I keep saying to myself because I refuse to think otherwise. I protect him from the negative plus he doesn’t understand the news. I’ll say it, I love my country but hate the President. Now my day job and the people, that’s a question.

I’m sorry I hate Math Echo, Counting On You Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 021 ~Give Orders You Would Follow~

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Camp NaNoWriMo, well general NaNoWriMo says 50,000 words, so I get it done, Brainbuddy suggest a podcast, and I listen to a bit, and of course, B III demands his morning stroll, when will someone follow me. Give Orders You Would Follow

Monday, July 22, 2019

Log 021 ~Give Orders You Would Follow~

Ninety-Fourth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, and you can be too. Yeah, I sound like one of my many motivations, Eric Thomas, Tom Bilyeu, Ray Lewis, etc. A better way of saying today’s rule might be Practice What You Preach. Yesterday, for example, I told myself I was going to finish my story, and I did so. Because Camp NaNoWriMo says, you can write 50,000 words in 30 days I finished. Even this morning, while I was on Brainbuddy for once. I read about this podcast, Porn Free Radio #185 How Successful Guys Overcome Edging.

My point is Madam Justice is I want to be a leader. You can’t lead, though unless you know what it means to follow. In my experience, I have known too many corrupt leaders. I always speak about the men that I admire. In these past days, I can add many more women. Don’t look at me like that, I respect women despite my BDSM teachings and dirty talk. Hell in my novel, the head honcho was a woman, the Mistress Director, and she’s a female I despise. Sadly though the leaders I’m surrounded by either make me laugh or make my blood boil. There’s the General Manager at the Day Job, A&W, my “father,” more. I want to be the best leader I can be for those who would follow. I’m a traditionalist, and I believe that a man, a husband, a father must lead his family, you know.

Any true leader of men, a commander, a general, a king, must be willing to die for those he leads. You know I’m not afraid to die, I’m scared to look STUPID. Madam Justice that remains my trigger. The fear that those under my charge will know failure because of my direction. They will know dejection, destruction, and death, and I will not do that to anyone. Strangely enough, my leaders lead me to such things. Brainbuddy is one of the few things that drive me towards being a better person. Rather than hating myself. If you give orders that should be the goal, for betterment. Soldiers will die to protect their families, their country. A submissive and dominant are both set free with their power. My son is happy because he knows I defend him, rethink the leash dynamic.

“Higher, Faster, Further baby” didn’t I say I respect women; Give Orders You Would Follow.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 016 ~Will Find FINE Princesses~

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It’s amazing what you can do when you don’t want to sleep; last night it was staring into the void until 1:00 AM, tonight it was 5,000 words, so I’m less than 10,000 away from the finish line but on being a good man. Will Find FINE Princesses

Wednesday, July 17, 2019

Log 016 ~Will Find FINE Princesses~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Millionaire right now, and inappropriate dammit. In full transparency, I don’t even know if they meant me, but I will take “The L” at his word. I wasn’t even thinking with “the D” last night, but more like Disney and Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. So what was my grand sin before bed? Once upon a time, I saw a beautiful woman from “It’s A Southern Thing” dressed as Snow White. I penned a small poem or whatever using the seven dwarfs names:

“I’m HAPPY seeing you, GRUMPY you’re taken, SLEEPY dreaming of you, DOPEY I know, a bit BASHFUL letting it all out, but SNEEZY never I like the outdoors, but I do need a DOC for my lovestruck heart ❤️”

Now “The L” liked this comment. So minutes later, I read, “Some people should keep their inappropriate thoughts to themselves 😮.” Now am I mistaken; perhaps, I know I didn’t get to sleep until 1:00 AM. Scared I’d get blocked, terrified I’m wrong for some reason. I didn’t eat dinner; I stopped playing TWD. Inspector Echo I will punish myself when I feel I’ve done wrong and again I doubt myself. Do you remember I spent one night deleting everything from one page because of one person? I don’t check Whisper replies anymore. I spend maybe an hour deleting fake friend requests and blocking chats. If you joke you learn to deal with the heckle right? I wasn’t trying to get the girl I thought I was saying something cute. Unlike Trump, I own up to my sins for your consideration.

  1. I Paid A Girl Hundreds To Get Naked. She didn’t like the things she had to say.
  2. I Compared A Girl And Her Friend To Brazzers and Reality Kings Porn Stars
  3. I Sent A Mom A Butterfree Pokémon And Quoted Butterfly By Crazy Town
  4. I Hit My Sister’s Ankle When I Was Only A Child
  5. I Gave A Mom $5.00 At Walmart When She Asked. Thought about “Street Blowjobs”
  6. I Admire Jimmy Stephens For True Teen Babes. I watch Teen Starlet and Honey Cream

I could continue Inspector Echo. I get blocked, ridiculed, sick, all kinds of horny. Do you know I had my ass beat by a man that beats his wife? Why don’t I give up writing anything; Will Find FINE Princesses.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 014 ~Live Or Die, Your Choice~

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Get busy living or well you know the alternative right and by now I should have a Master’s in ditch digging, though I truly wish I could be as smart as Jigsaw or even The Origami Killer, it’s more acceptable than my writing. Live Or Die, Your Choice.

Monday, July 15, 2019

Log 014 ~Live Or Die, Your Choice~

Ninety-Third Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now writing something else for my network. As always I dream of Pure Taboo, Fetish Network. The Passion Network, SBJ, TTB, Teen Starlet, and Honey-Cream.com. Don’t mind me and my list though, if I were Arya Stark, it would be more acceptable. Madam Justice that is my point today, the things that make us feel alive. People often look at the moments before death or fighting to stay alive. I’ll admit those work for me as well. Even more so if we’re talking about B III’s life, protecting him always.

It’s too damn easy to talk about the things that Make Me Wanna Die as the song goes. The day job, for example, you think that would be incentive enough to work harder. There are reasons I don’t visit my Olds. Know I rather die than feel STUPID. Even in my novel today. The Beast feared more for others than he does himself, and he knows he deserves death. What about the world as a whole? People live in fear, terror, and hate. We are told to be slaves and to accept it as the will of God. Some choose to die in all manners rather than take the life they were given or even picked. That’s my weakness, The Weapon Of Choice. No, it is in its failure or the fear of such. I still feel the guilt of my crimes, the things even today I continue to commit.

Now when it comes to my writing though Madam Justice, sometimes it’s not even a choice these days. Writings ownership, obligation, and okay. Almost every day, I mention Dennis Hof. He faced accusations of exploiting young women at his Ranches. You know Jimmy Stephens who does what thousands of photographers do. Only his models wear fewer clothes. There are others of course in various methods. I watch Trump, his attempts to destroy for women, and from his people, there is nothing but applause. People are fighting for the right to live to exist and what about me Madam Justice. I struggle to write the words Humping Happens Hannah. There is also Exercising Eager Elizabeth, and Satisfying Sinners Sophia, “wholly” original. I write books that will never see the light of day; I don’t ever live.

I talked about running before, how I hide under layers, I only leave if necessary. I go to the movies, more darkness. Who chooses, can’t I be human and beast; Live Or Die, Your Choice.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 350 ~The Devil’s Innocent Will~

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What a difference a week makes, last time I was all set for one word “CONGRATULATIONS” despite everything and this one, three little words, not what you think, and that’s a warning if you want to continue. “The Devil’s Innocent Will” but me

Sunday, June 16, 2019

Episode 350 ~The Devil’s Innocent Will~

To Will:
I AM a Millionaire right now, but Only God Can Judge Me. Tupac was, and so he believed. Now, of course, I won’t dare compare myself to Tupac. Indeed, today, you get to start your life over again after my indiscretion. In this, I apologize, and I take full responsibility. You know, as one of your favorite Motivations goes, “Whatever It Takes.” Yesterday I spoke of alliteration and today is a bit of the same. I know you hate English class, but here we have synonyms of desire.

Dirty Mom Tits, Humping Harlot Hannah, and Bella Thorne’s Nudes. Yes (LANGUAGE) I told MILF Dos the first, didn’t dare to name the second for Pinterest. Of course the third was in the news last night. Speaking of the press, Donald Trump, months before there was Brett Kavanagh. There is also Jimmy Stephens who should not be a role model, but Hugh Hefner, Dennis Hof? What about the people who took advantage of Belle Knox? People also vilified her for her business. Let’s stick to Trump. You don’t have a problem with his paying Pornstars or Playmates. Hell, that’s your life goal, business model. Also, you don’t have a problem with models, girls with sex appeal, CONSENSUAL arrangements. The thing is the President is a villain but are you, no but still Six Impossible Things.

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 068 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  2. I Will Be The “Father” B III Deserves
    Failed
  3. I Will Name My Novel And Write A Back Cover Of It
    Failed
  4. I Will Review The Five
    Failed
  5. I Will Have “GULP” Published, $1,212 Outskirts Press
    Failed
  6. I Will Finish Reading Beauty in the Broken: A Diamond Magnate Novel by Charmaine Pauls Failed
  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I Will Be The “Father” B III Deserves
  3. I Will Name My Novel And Write A Back Cover Of It
  4. I Will Review The Five
  5. I Will Have “GULP” Published “Unknown” By Someone
  6. I Will Finish Reading Beauty in the Broken: A Diamond Magnate Novel by Charmaine Pauls

The Hero’s A Zero and that’s your problem. Do you remember the song “Born To Raise Hell” from Motorhead? Everyone says that everything you want in this world is a one-way ticket to Hell. It’s not that you can’t do it (okay that’s part) any way they say everything you want is wrong. It’s like “Slaves To Passion” the artist Kaoru. The things he did in the name of artistic expression, okay so he was a borderline criminal. Anyway, the point is the things that nurtured his gift he could never share with his wife. You see, villains are allowed to do anything for the right price. You’re not righteous, but you ain’t as bad as that. The Devil did not wish to bow and for that fact where did he end up going, Will?

Man has the law, and you’re a law-abiding citizen, but it’s a crime to want more. Words are powerful Will, as well as thoughts, and there are actions. A Pinterest board, ten bucks, cumming; responsibility, innocence; The Devil’s Innocent Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 344 ~You Should Start Tomorrow Today~

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As a Dominant I know all about the importance of trust, physically, mentally momentarily, privacy, and while I have no problem sharing my thoughts *snickers* Outskirts Press wants a great many pennies so why not. You Should Start Tomorrow Today.

Monday, June 10, 2019

Episode 344 ~You Should Start Tomorrow Today~

Eighty-Eighth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, but by tomorrow I should have two million. Madam Justice it seems that every little coincidence has lined up to tell me to go for it. My book, the money is there, I’m all set and then smash. A lousy word considering what I intended to use $1,200, again MILF Dos drools. Today I was getting ready to payoff Outskirts Press, but I don’t know who to trust. You should have seen me this morning I was ready, how could I not be now?

Am I breaking today’s rule as we speak and after working the Day Job? I know who to hate, fear, and the other head. Madam Justice I have jumped from Sydney Sweeney (I should stop watching The Handmaid’s Tale)? Hayley Pullos, Alycia Debnam-Carey, Kelli Berglund I could go on for a while. Well not on my bank account and the ironic thing is, most of those dollars were preparing for my end. You heard me before say Alamo, my Alamo Project, the Fund I set up, as in Just In Case. A thousand dollars, a nice hotel room, having fun with a hooker. Next would be the best drugs I could find or hell This Is America, but maybe I shouldn’t finish that thought. Here I am, and there’s still time to sign on Outskirts.

If I could start tomorrow today, it would be nothing like reality. A work day in my dream life would begin with a full eight hours of sleep. Listening to tunes with my wife and since it’s Summer, if not X-rated fun time, I want to enjoy being with my family. B III is starting to go gray, but he loves his siblings. My submissive cooks, excuse me, that’s my wife. I will check on my holdings, which aren’t far. As always brothel, hotel, strip club, restaurant, a small studio. Now my main movie studio will be based in Hollywood. Might shoot a movie, and afterward take a light nap. Go out with my family to our private beach, watch my kids play, my wife pulls me away from my writing. Dinner, movies, put my kids to bed and do things to my wife that put adult cinema to shame.

So why can’t I have that? I don’t fear failure. I fear people. Only somehow, someway I know Madam Justice You Should Start Tomorrow Today.

I Will Have No Fear