Log 324 ~Will’s Embarrassing Wily Whims~

Maybe I won’t be able to find something for a customer. It could be wearing my bandanna as a mask because I was so late to the party, not fearing the apocalypse. Hell, it might be this conversation. Will’s Embarrassing Wily Whims.

Wednesday, May 20, 2020

Log 324 ~Will’s Embarrassing Wily Whims~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but I am finding it hard to stay positive. Hell, I have another book idea? If I were to write down everything that humiliates, embarrasses, and shames me, SIGH. Now that would be over Fifty-Thousand words. Today I don’t intend to go so far, but the Day Job is calling, so I’ll be in no mood to write. You know Inspector Echo, I would make a “decent” masochist, seeing as how I want the pain. Oh, and sex isn’t something I’m ashamed of, for the most part, at least, um yeah?

Anyway took a look at my schedule for the Day Job, I’m expecting “humiliations galore.” Of course, I know I don’t have to. I could walk in, and my temperature could spike over 100° F.

I’m not sick but angry, expecting embarrassment, hiding my real work. Speaking of which while my real life sucks. Yes, I said it, SUCKS, another one of my most hated words. Only because people took it from me, you know. Back to my point, what about The Eve of a Cherry or GULP? I let people read my stories and what happens, hmm. Dead in the Water as the song goes, which should cool me off. Yes, I like Ellie Goulding and Abba. I have a dedicated playlist that sings of my shame. Not Ellie Goulding but others. Yesterday though, I was reading over GULP… well, damn you Grammarly app.

Will’s Hated Words:

  1. Skeevy
  2. Stupid
  3. Merge
  4. Happy
  5. Family-Friendly
  6. Just Kidding
  7. Tease
  8. Freak
  9. Lazy
  10. Sucks

It’s my fault too, though, for wasting so much time. Here it is May, and I should have long ago published. No, today I got so caught up thinking about the Day Job I had to take a nap. Now my whole schedule is thrown off. Showering at the whims of My Dæmon. Using him as an excuse, yeah, I should be ashamed. What about the new game I’m playing? Yes, Inspector Echo, I’m still all about Call me a Legend. Life imitating art, living in the plague era, chasing the girlies, and I’m not the best father I can be. How about being a friend? I’ve barely talked to Indiana Gone. I don’t know what M Anime is up to. Well, I did hear from Whisper Girl, and what about Cherry, yeah my novel.

I’m sorry, Inspector Echo, for expecting the worst. For sometimes even rooting for the Coronavirus. Living Will’s Embarrassing Wily Whims.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 320 ~The “Way Out” Will~

I and no good without my nap, but I have worse crimes, of course, and here I am plotting some sort of way out, or at least I hope so. How much is it going to cost me though $45 or more, hmm? The “Way Out” Will.

Saturday, May 16, 2020

Log 320 ~The “Way Out” Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but how? Now you know how I hate sounding like the President. There are plenty of ways I would like this period in history to end though I lack the “liberty” to share them. Besides, we should talk about me and How’s It Going To End?

Should we talk about Thursday, seeing as how it’s Wednesday now? You’re seeing this as Saturday, though. The wonders of Time-Travel. Chances are I ain’t no fortunate son. Yeah, still at the Day Job and next week; there’s no end looks like. When’s the last time I finished a video game? Far Cry 5, NOPE, Heavy Rain, negative, Call me a Legend, are you serious with my little virtual harem? I know Lady Luna, but what was I doing in the shower? I see all my secrets coming to light, losing the social life that I do have, or being oh so sorry. Again there might not be an end, only repeating everything over and over. I’m sorry if I sound down, but this is what happens when I don’t get my afternoon nap. You know I still hate waking up early, and for what?

If there is an end, I hope it’s not like my books, me breaking, or a bunch of lost bucks. The emptiness Lady Luna, that’s the only way I can describe it. It feels so good, but then there’s only okay, and what do I have to show for it. 50,000 words, a clear mind for a few hours, or making some pretty girl happy. That’s what I have been sitting here contemplating. $45 to become a Patron. I only now got the Day Job back, and today I want to spend money, quick escape.

No Lady Lu, I’m talking to you because as the song goes, I’m Gonna Be Somebody. Funny, I use the song from Police Academy, and how often do I break the law? Yeah, I’m not behind bars… been there done that when I was in juvenile detention. It’s not like Coronavirus (COVID-19) did a number on me. Other than a bunch of new rules, and yes, I’m still mad at Academy Sports + Outdoors. I don’t let go of anything, right? My way out is with Bucks, Babes, and let’s say Biology for now, hmm?

So how to obtain those things, The “Way Out” Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 318 ~Howling, Hot Here’s Willy~

As the “Fresh Prince” once said, “Hurt Me, Hurt Me,” though I’m more a sadist, to be honest, it’s just the way I get all “warm and tingly,” or how I’m buying my ticket to Hell perhaps. Howling, Hot Here’s Willy

Thursday, May 14, 2020

Log 318 ~Howling, Hot Here’s Willy~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I must be a HOT commodity. Again this is going to be one of those conversations. Brought to you by the letter H. I will also yet again blame Girlfriend Reviews. Should Your Boyfriend Play Nier: Automata? Yeah, seeing as I feel some kind of way towards 2B and Commander White. Not that I have much time to play video games, and I’m on day six of NO FAP. Which leads me into today and what is getting me hot, besides liking alliteration.

HUMILIATION, how many times must we talk about it? I don’t know as long as I like the real stories from some women. You know the language that I always prefer the whole word “Whore” in comparison to “HO.” Loving the way a girl moans and groans it, her cries. HOWLING, and no, I don’t mean like a wolf. For a man like me who enjoys getting his cock sucked, I like loud girls. No, not that kind of loud if you know what I mean. Bedroom noise, not waste my time gibberish. For a girl to choose you, over-breathing, blowjobs, or my name. HOLY, a divine experience. I do enjoy good girls, no doubt, and between maids and nuns. For some reason, I’ve gotten it into my head that kimonos are holy, but I know they were usual. Between Kurenai, Fuu, this Mob/Mafia game I played on Facebook, and others well cue Homer Drool.

HEAVY, not in the slightest, but what about the likes of Momokun who showed off her ta-tas? I won’t lie, I’m still hoping to see Cherry’s, but I haven’t asked in quite a while. As skinny as I am Dirty Diana, where do I get off? On BBWs, but not today, keep it in my pants. HOPING though to be a father someday. Is pregnancy sexy? There was this girl I wanted to date that got knocked up. Watching wrestling last night, Becky Lynch, announced she’s pregnant. In The Eve of a Cherry, one of my characters was expecting. Beautiful MILFS. HOT yet, Dirty Diana? Time marches on, and the things that get me going damn me to Hell ever more so. I was at the Day Job, and my temperature climbed; I’m not sick.

Well, at least not with the Coronavirus but my pending desires, Howling, Hot Here’s Willy.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 315 ~No Rest For The Wicked~

My first day back at the Day Job officially, and I hope I’m not sick. Maybe the zombies will finally take the planet, which is far more likely than my finishing a book for publication, don’t you think? No Rest For The Wicked.

Monday, May 11, 2020

Log 315 ~No Rest For The Wicked~

Hundred And Thirty-Sixth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but I can’t be evil; I sleep way too much. Then again, I know plenty of sinners that sleep like babies. Am I saying that all rich people are evil… was it hard choosing sides between Captain America and Ironman? SIGH that has me thinking about the Day Job. No, I’m not a superhero, not even an ESSENTIAL worker, I’m only in retail. So how was my first day back? Well, seeing’s it’s Saturday right now, and last night I wanted to vomit looking at my schedule. As I talked about yesterday, being “Status Quo” is one thing. What evil things do keep me up at night?

The worse would have to be when My Dæmon isn’t feeling well. It means I’m forgetting what it is to be a father when I can’t help him. All of yesterday, I was figuring out how to buy his meds. I bought food, shared fries, let him hog the bed. Still, he’s an old man, and I’m fighting time. Speaking of time, what am I doing for Mother’s Day? One of those “holy” holidays I forgot about while talking to Dear Future Wife? The good news is, I haven’t forgotten, seeing again I know what day it is. Only what do I think about what my Mom told me yesterday about my grandfather? Should I be broken up, destroyed about my Granddad having the Coronavirus (COVID-19)? I told everyone about the man who said, and I quote, “I don’t know you,” and that’s not him being old. Family… what family?

No Lady Sophia I’m too busy looking at Girls, Girls, Girls, all night. I swear I can’t go to sleep until I, well? Afterward, I still don’t want to sleep, as Dennis Hof said, he goes looking for the next party. It’s like The Matrix; all I see is blonde, brunette, redhead. Same with my stories, didn’t I mention Indiana Gone, Whisper Girl, and Cherry. I write about the things I would like to do to women and then crickets, tumbleweeds, utter silence. I would never consider silence as my fear, but people treat it as a sin. If I want to talk about sin, though, what about the things I do to myself. Hell, it’s why I’m still alive.

If I ever published a book or built a brothel? No Rest For The Wicked.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 313 ~Will The New World~

Well, last week I asked what I do for money, and now sometime soon it will be back to the Day Job, I suppose. Indeed I finished one book and was working on a long-overdue poetry compilation. Will The New World?

Saturday, May 9, 2020

Log 313 ~Will The New World~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I should be all into the. Brand New, as the song goes. Lady Lu, as per usual, I speak to you two days from the past. Time travel can be quite finicky, so if I told you I would find myself here? I’m a man having a panic attack, exhausted, well hell, isn’t that every day? Today though, I have received my marching orders to return to the world. Only the place I knew wasn’t so great. The land that awaits me, I’m not looking forward to. For now, I can’t see the aftermath, but there are other worlds.

“Only a man unable to handle the actual world would create another one in which to hide.”
― Andrew Davidson

I’m not suicidal, but at this moment, I want to return to the blackness of sleep. It’s no secret that I’m lazy above everything Lady Luna. Look, you’re my first girl, my favorite… my light in the dark, closest to where I want to be. In the night, not having to face the new day. Only when I find myself thrown into the world, I build new ones. One more reason that I’m a writer. I need somewhere to go, but then it’s like something out of The Handmaid’s Tale. My worlds are never “Better” for everyone, especially women, but I’m not in the mood today. I don’t wish to be one of these STUPID people comparing having a Day Job to some worse part of history. Still, I feel like I am doomed to repeat it as soon as I leave this “warm” bed.

“Better never means better for everyone… It always means worse, for some.”
― Margaret Atwood

I say it like that because I’m not sure if it’s the weather or my blood running cold. Fear freezes me, and there’s another F-Word that heats me right up. I’m not angry, though, and the other feeling I’m avoiding like the plague all around us. Coronavirus (COVID-19) hasn’t given me the world I imagined, as if I could handle it. Again I’m sitting here in bed trying not to think how good I had it and all the work I could have gotten done. Now I sound like Trump wasting my time. I don’t believe I will have the luxury of losing myself to the music or some audiobook. If I call upon the future, it will always be for My Dæmon’s continued health and the world I wish to build for him.

Today though (Thursday), is this normal or Will The New World…

I Will Have No Fear

Log 311 ~Star Wars Again, Willy~

I should have made it Star Wars week now that I think about it, but still, I like more girls in the Star Wars Universe, well in the entire universe than there are days in the week. Anyway, let me bring three Star Wars Again, Willy

Thursday, May 7, 2020

Log 311 ~Star Wars Again, Willy~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, dare I say approaching a trillionaire if I owned Disney? When I was young and went to Disney World for the first time, I said I was happy. Isn’t that what you are supposed to say there, hell what did I know. Let’s ask what sparks joy in my life. Shirtless starlets, swords indeed lightsabers, and Star Wars. Two out of three ain’t bad, but here we are today. To think of it, Diana, I should have made it Star Wars week. Anyway, so my top three Star Wars Sluts.

Now you know me, Dirty Diana, so this should be easy to guess. Of all the stars amongst the galaxies far, far away, these three… (Homer Drool). We begin with the original. Leia Amidala Skywalker, aka Princess Leia. Leia Organa, General Organa, Leia Skywalker Organa Solo. Again I can never be one to simply fuck some girl without knowing her. As the song goes, I’m not good at a one-night stand. Anything else about her… played by Carrie Frances Fisher. Her Hoth outfit is my second favorite, but always Slave Leia. If I were to design slave outfits ever damn.

While I’m all about innocence and purity, hell this week, I was watching something on The Handmaid’s Tale. A bit on Madonna-whore complex. You ever heard you can’t turn a whore into a housewife? Before I get too much into my head ahem Padmé Amidala, aka Padmé Amidala Naberrie, Queen Amidala. Dirty Diana, I’m not looking to be saved, but I already mentioned Homer, right? He asked Marge once, “I need you to do this with me.” I’m Anakin, and I need my Padme. Plus, choking is a “Soft limit” of mine. The things I would do to Natalie Portman.

At last, we come to Rey Skywalker, played by Daisy Jazz Isobel Ridley. We have firmly established that I have a thing for hot brunettes with sweet tits ha. Should I also mention I don’t care much for sand? There is a song, though, that says, “Make love on a beach of jet black sand.” I still dream of having my family on the beach, but today isn’t for that. I’m thinking of Leia doing Jabba or sharing Han. Padme being punished or rutting inside ravishing Rey over and over. Should have shared but no, dreaming Star Wars Again, Willy.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 306 ~Will Comes With Interest~

I sort of despise that question, what do you do for fun? I’m more, what do I do for money? There’s reading, but I want to be a better writer. With what I call writing, I want to get paid. What about everything else? Will Comes With Interest

Saturday, May 2, 2020

Log 306 ~Will Comes With Interest~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I should get a few new interests. Preferably one that pays well because it’s always about the money with me? Every single motivation I listen to says, “DON’T FOLLOW MONEY.” Still, I’m worried about getting back into Far Cry 5 or hell, Final Fantasy 7, what about Mass Effect?

Anyway, I’ve spent some time pondering the “Big Questions,” for example, why are people so STUPID. I hate that word, but people are fighting to stay broke. What kind of “man” am I hoping that most of them die to make the world a better place? Is it possible to save us? M Anime believes the end is nigh, and yet she’s falling in love with a trucker. Cherry is falling for her publisher. Confession time Lady Lu, and while I usually save this for Inspector Echo, here’s the question. Has any woman felt “Romantic, sexual love” for me minus the price tag? I told The Karlee Grey, who’s one of my top ten favorite pornstars ever I rather talk to you than throw out another $20.00. Hours ago, I felt stirrings, and with this evening? I read that the Quarantine could affect my libido, explaining how horny I’ve been.

I haven’t checked my bank account lately, but didn’t I say, money is what matters? Lady Lu, I should be taking this time to read. The Dæmon thinks I should cut the grass in the backyard. What about my gun? I should learn how to load faster and should head to a gun range. Talk about a lack of courage. I’m still upset that I didn’t have the balls to drive away from Taco Bell. I paid for a taco I didn’t order. I didn’t complain. Which I planned on doing. Yeah, I want zombies?

Then who would be left to read The Eve of a Cherry? I finished the first round of edits only yesterday. Speaking of which what about the Gown of Chaos, which is a “small” story I started years ago. There’s also Gulp, which is May’s project, if I’m not headed back to the Day Job. Oh, why should I talk about myself getting paid though Gay For Pay came to mind on OnlyFans? No, more like spending money to lead people to you, Lady Lu. So many ideas today, you know, Will Comes With Interest.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 304 ~Well HELLo There Will~

How does one avoid Hell and not live a miserable existence? Well, if I look at my life, I seem to be headed in both directions, as “Hot, Hard, and Horny” as I am. I’m not sick, well not that kind anyway. Well HELLo There Will

Thursday, April 30, 2020

Log 304 ~Well HELLo There Will~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, by being, HOT, HARD, and HORNY as HELL. Well, I have read much about the way to Heaven, the straight and narrow path. As the song goes, the Stairway to Heaven. On the other side, the road to Hell is open and broad. The Highway to Hell if you will. If we’re talking about something being big to quote yet one more song, my Enormous Penis. What, Dirty Diana, I told you I was missing the music these days. Music was the escape, and Love is the promised land, but LUST is so welcoming now.

I should shut my mouth okay with these ideas, but I want to close a woman’s instead. If I could speak no evil, then chances are I would never talk at all. Sex allows me to be quite vocal, but even that is a competition with a woman. One more reason to like blowjobs, I guess. Is that an evil thought? Since I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m the “darkest” person I know, how best to silence myself. A woman’s screams, of course. Hell Dirty Diana, it’s like I became “Cade in The Eve of a Cherry,” he needs “HER” pain to hide in. I only now saw that, which leads me to “see no evil.” Dirty Diana, that is what I’m having the most trouble with now. Am I calling pretty, pretty girls evil? It’s my one-eyed monster that is seeing too much.

Should I say no, considering I’m usually busy in the shower? Again with the music, I Want To Hold Your Hand. I’m trying to keep mine busy though, that’s why I like handjobs too. A writer’s fantasy and would make me a better one if I could keep both hands on the keyboard. Would my heart be in it, though? What heart you’re asking yourself and above all else you know I LOVE boobs. Yes, I still somewhat regret using that word. But I was talking to Inspector Echo yesterday about so many tits. It makes me sound like an ass, doesn’t it? Being a black man and yet I was always more boobs than ass though if you read my novel, half and half. Am I not going to talk about the ahem pussy?

For now, you know I know the path right to Hell; Well, HELLo There Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 299 ~Well That’s Sick Will~

The tip of the iceberg knowing why this is happening. Who am I to speak on it knowing what I want to write for a living. STUPIDITY is the real sickness, but I’m staying at the house, and I’m not fighting to stay broke. “Well That’s Sick Will” ha

Saturday, April 25, 2020

Log 299 ~Well That’s Sick Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and being in the 1%, with a bunker, bullets, and bombs, don’t can’t forget about the babes. Lady Lu, I would be doing what the wealthy are doing now. Only I’m not, so why do I think this all had to happen with the Coronavirus (COVID-19).

The American Dream Lady Luna. You know I’ll be the first to admit that I’m lazy, but I have the Day Job. I have enough money to see myself and My Dæmon throughout the week. Every payday, I would budget barely enough for a movie, some fast food, some porn. One-week, Lady Lu and society collapses. People can’t survive a week without a paycheck. It doesn’t sound like much of an economy to me or LIFE. Save enough for a rainy day, I hear. Who thinks that $1,200 will restart the economy and for what, a return to the status quo? Not trying to sound like Jacob Seed here, but “cull the herd!” People are dying for the rich, and so be it if they wish. I don’t know how to stop it. THEY advise you shouldn’t find your passion for the money, but I am a writer. If you can’t beat them as they say well, join them, sigh.

I can’t save the world either. It cheers me, though, that this might be Mother Nature’s way of stopping us. Hell, I only drive once a week now. Now I’m not an environmentalist or anything, but I’m not a killer either. Outside of my stories, at least. The world is fighting back against the plague, which is people. You know I can relate, minus the zombies I’m living a very minor apocalypse fantasy. On top of everything being wiped out, there’s the plague of STUPIDITY.

Of course, this leads me to President Trump shudders. Here’s a problem not of his making so he can’t fix it. All the tweets and rants won’t stop the Coronavirus. It won’t vanish whit the next news cycle; it is omnipresent. I am not a righteous man, but this plague I somewhat consider divine retribution. A guilty man goes free, and nobody will stop him, so now the world has ended. All I know is I’m not fighting to stay broke, I dream of being better… Wednesday night, well dammit.

Money, Mother, and Morons, the Coronavirus, Well That’s Sick Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 297 ~Will’s Pandemic Porn Parodies~

My entire life is a parody of the life I should be living. Like Sheldon Cooper, I do believe in many universes, and I do enjoy the Big Bang Theory XXX reality. Still, I’m pretty “sick” no not with COVID-19. “Will’s Pandemic Porn Parodies” or not

Thursday, April 23, 2020

Log 297 ~Will’s Pandemic Porn Parodies~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but if I’m going to Hell, it won’t because of GREED. Yes, I’m greedy as all Hell, but I always saw myself as Circle Two material, LUST. That’s where my sickness resides. Now you probably thought this would be all about Coronavirus (COVID-19), of course.

Better to stick with the sickness, I do have Dirty Diana. For example, and I know this isn’t right, but the horror stories women tell and a few men. Now when I talk about men, I do mean S. Wolf and Todd Michael, authors. You know I like far too many female erotic authors. This week I’ve been looking over Pornographic Parodies. Don’t get me wrong here, “Big Bang Theory: A XXX Parody” has its moments, ah Beverly Hills. My point is, though, it’s the REAL stories that turn me on. I’ve told you about Court Carmody. Only what about Eileen Kelly, Angie Varona, Miriam Weeks, aka Belle Knox, or Stormy Daniels. Some others I’m not STUPID enough to mention. I saw this post about a pornstar sometime back who had been hurt. What is wrong with my head, right?

There was a time Dirty Diana I was all about love, and now it’s more tits. It took me a while to talk to you because I was busy trying not to FAP watching Siri’s tits. The pornstar, not the computer voice, hah. Well, it was more listening to her moan and imagining a big pair of mounds in a pink bra. See it’s not only my mind but my body, I wanted to break so bad from last night to this morning, so how did I fight back? Here and now, Dirty Diana, which leads me to my writing.

I’m still not buying The Eve of a Cherry is publishable, pretty damn good, and isn’t more porn than erotic. At this rate, I want to add even more to the story, yeah pleasing penis portions. So today’s Log is brought to you by the letter P, I guess. Anyway, I’m exhausted, and that’s because this sickness is keeping me up, literally. Again I’m not talking about the Coronavirus. What did I say about checking WebMD? My eye is all screwy, and my chest was hurting some still I write.

Yeah, fictional sex scenes and now Cart Girls not beating out Will’s Pandemic Porn Parodies.

I Will Have No Fear