Tag: Fear

Episode 098 ~Will To Bear Arms~

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Roll up your sleeves; my hands should get dirty, last night I didn’t have an excuse considering I was naked running around a college campus or a hospital… relax I was dreaming, but I shouldn’t be doing either. “Will To Bear Arms.”

Sunday, October 7, 2018

Episode 098 ~Will To Bear Arms~

To Will:
How to make One Million Dollars, I am not a prophet, and you’re not looking like much of anything these days but to be fair, I called the bad news which never seems to end and the good news… what good news? I’m still one for dreaming though, and while it wasn’t a nightmare per se, the last dream predicted trouble at work, though I didn’t know why… because I wasn’t wearing “excessive happiness,” this time I wasn’t wearing anything *gulp* naked really?

Last week I was told to be positive and in the very same thought I was told I was dying, Monday was the last day of the glass being half-full, hell I started with such passion, the two reviews are nearly done, except for keywords, excerpts, pictures, etc. Maybe that’s what the dream was about last night, but we’ll get to that; sometimes I wonder, do you even understand what I’m trying to say, nobody else gets it, and you will have the same excuses come next Sunday. As I said so many people are losing everything, and here you are, I would tell you not to give into temptation but between Fapping, pretty girls who talk a good “game” and a difficult time reading, *sigh* read Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. I Will Review “Ven” (V Games) Ker Dukey, K. Webster
Failed
4. I Will Review “Life Itself”
Failed
5. I Will Finish “Under His Heel.” By Adara Wolf
Failed
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”
Failed

One point again; now maybe the dream last night was saying that you’re taking on too much stuff, hell I didn’t want to stand so I took a bath and keeping with the bad karma, the Wi-Fi cut out when I sat; yes I said karma because of this great rage. Considering I was running around naked on a college campus/hospital maybe you need to get smarter and healthier, or you’re not dead yet because the whole damn world is beginning is starting to feel like a cemetery. It could even be the understanding that I talk too damn much sometimes; I bare or again bear too much, one way or another you will get hurt if something doesn’t change but not Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Review “Ven” (V Games) Ker Dukey and K. Webster
4. I Will Review “Life Itself”
5. I Will Finish “Under His Heel.” By Adara Wolf
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”

So what should this week be about, or will you be like Moses and Ramses and call the next plague, that’s why you’ve been on Amazon, Best Buy and Walmart sites; you say you care about being a writer and what are you doing? This morning you saw what matters and don’t say it because you don’t want to jinx yourself but do you have what it takes, to survive this week, the rage is still there but your hands, your arms, have a higher destiny, Will To Bear Arms.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 094 ~Misery For The Willing~

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I’ve never found tears beautiful; I told my “father” once at Disney World I was crying with joy but other than making it rain dollars he’s only brought me sadness and now, I have become a partner in the business of misery. Misery For The Willing

Wednesday, September 26, 2018

Episode 094 ~Misery For The Willing~

Forgive Me Echo,
How to make One Million Dollars, stop spending money on books but fortunately I have already read Misery by Stephen King so buying it isn’t a priority though I have been thinking about getting a new Kindle. Anything to avoid the sadness that has overwhelmed my life as of late and I’m not even talking about my depression, four dead Fur Babies, a deceased husband, one Break-In and a MILF asking for money; I’m a bad man.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPBtCBPg_o0

Isn’t this what this is all about Inspector Echo, me being bad, I see all my friends losing their four-legged children, and I can’t do right by mine; well I did cut the grass, but of course we both know why I did that. The woman that lost her husband, dammit I should have been sweeter to her, I mean she does say hi to me but so does my friend whose house got robbed, and in all honesty, I don’t know what to say or do for her. Speaking of which I know what I want to do for the MILF, right there in the title “Mom I’d Like to…” but if I said that to her or how I want to help her, yeah everyone I know would quickly hate my guts.

Donald, Brett, Will, I do not need that sort of comparison, and yet I go back to that day in the Walmart parking lot when that mom approached me and asked for money for her and her daughter, and I gave her five dollars and for a week after I regretted it, why? What would she have done for more and yes I know this isn’t Reality Kings or Brutal Castings, I’m not talking to Dirty Diana here but the fact that such a thought crossed my mind and now here we are but on a positive note I know I’m wrong. Like I told “Cherry” though I am going through a time of my life when I’m won’t say “I’m Sorry” at the rate I would always be sorry because I’m waiting for the next tragedy to come down.

I must wonder might it be the same for others, we can’t remember the Las Vegas shooting, can’t feel bad for some crying white guy, worry about the animals, the ozone, and everything else and then we’re told to live each day as though it were our last. Can you forgive me Inspector Echo for having the strangest question of What’s So Bad About Feeling Good, how about forgiveness for not being a better father and friend, or wanting to bribe needy women, I need less Misery For The Willing?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Euz9a0oAlw

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 091 ~To The Positive Will~

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They say a few drinks; well, I only need one, but maybe this is one more addiction, the misery, the depression, and when I do “party?” Honestly, it’s a responsibility to feel good but with this week? “To A Positive Will”

Sunday, September 30, 2018

Episode 091 ~To The Positive Will~

To Will:
How to make One Million Dollars, well first don’t spend all your money on liquor and Indiana Gone would tell you that you’re not much of a drinker; one glass of wine honestly and you’ve had more than one some occasions. Hell you still have how many Root “Beers” and a bottle of wine but you do understand that it can make you brave, bold and even full of bliss or “filling” that but you’re “trying” not to feel that at the moment *sigh* Alexa Bliss but you actually blew it on another MILF, such is your disappointment.

Regret, disappointment, and our good friend FEAR and shouldn’t we also talk about laziness, after today you won’t, I mean, it’s done, it’s over this week and even this moment besides wasting today, making a mess and worrying about tomorrow what’s left. That’s the thing, there’s nothing, for the past few weeks, it’s been sort of like the opposite of Pandora’s Box, every negative thing comes in, I burn it away with lust and rage, and I don’t know if hope is a phoenix or that she’s fled. Sometimes I envy people who can anesthetize themselves with anything and everything, drugs, drinks, or destruction, isn’t that what I do every week with Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. I Will Review “Ven” (V Games) Ker Dukey and K. Webster
Failed
4. I Will Review “Life Itself”
Failed
5. I Will Finish “Under His Heel.” By Adara Wolf
Failed
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”
Failed

One freaking point, you’re alive, I survived, and I’m telling you to live on more than bloodlust, retail therapy, fapping, being love stoned, and whatever else there is, Will, my friend you’re dying. Fire can cook food but too much or not enough and there’s danger, it can warm your home or burn it down, it can light the way or reveal Hell itself and what is it that you choose this week. No like any addict you want a hit and then you wait for the end of the world, and yes I’m harsh because at this rate what else is there I ask? I mean if it’s not rage, not sex, for damn sure you’re not a decent person with Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Review “Ven” (V Games) Ker Dukey and K. Webster
4. I Will Review “Life Itself”
5. I Will Finish “Under His Heel.” By Adara Wolf
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”

Why even bother changing the list this week, some people tell the day by the bottle that they drink as Bon Jovi put it, you know the day by all the stuff that you won’t do today, tomorrow, two days from now but let “Okay” come over, and suddenly you’re up. That’s the moral of the story Will, find something that gets you up, other than a woman that you won’t touch, or some other vice; To A Positive Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 087 ~Will Buys Some L’s~

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If only I stuck to brunettes and not hot redheads, or girls that want me to work certain days and a manager that doesn’t know I will not tolerate, Dumb, Dumber, and Dumbest but I’m still the loser here. Will Buys More L’s

Wednesday, September 26, 2018

Episode 087 ~Will Buys Some L’s~

Forgive Me Echo,
How to make One Million Dollars or not because let’s be honest, I’m lazy, late, and driven by lust on the best of days and of course, this isn’t one, and I can’t remember the last one, to be honest. I wasn’t lazy at the day job, no, only a loser and yes this is going to be one more depressing conversation, I have noticed my viewership going down which is saying a lot and I want to say I don’t pay people to like me ever…

So should I explain what happened yesterday when DUMB asked me for money, and I reached into my pocket, as luck would have it I didn’t have enough but what is it they say, it’s the thought that counts? I’m continually complaining about money nowadays, and both DUMB and DUMBER are costing me because I don’t know how to deal with those assholes other than to lay back and take it, fuck, and I know Inspector Echo, watch the language.

Love is a bad word or even like which explains why I was such a lame brain today on Messenger but what am I afraid of, other than someone putting a pretty girl in front of me and I get all stupid? Hell if I let nature happen and give up this whole NO FAP nonsense I would be quite lucid most of the day, and I wouldn’t have to sit here in fear of tomorrow, but at least I told one of the managers no about work because I can’t let the anxiety go Inspector Echo, you know that.

Which leads me to why we’re talking now instead of hours ago, and it’s not that I’m lethargic, again I am afraid and you know something, perhaps that’s the silver lining; while I’m nowhere near courageous, I’m alive, I’m moving, and the movie ain’t over yet. However, am I lying to myself thinking that I can change it, I “try” to get healthier and every day it seems I get sick, I say I’m going to work, and then I repeat later on. Every Morning, the alarm lambastes me, and instead of fighting to stay awake or do something productive or constructive, I do nothing; sometimes even worse I go back to sleep, my hypocrisy.

“Fear does something strange to people like Al. But not you. Fear doesn’t shut you down, it wakes you up.” Tobias Eaton A.K.A. Four (Divergent)

Can you forgive me Inspector Echo, for being as low as I’ve been for… hell who knows, and again it’s lying to say things might get better, how about forgiveness for losing “loot” from motivation to rap right, I’m sorry for being lame and of course Will Buys More L’s.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 085 ~Anger Burns Hotter Than Lust~

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Too many sad friends to give into my misery, and trying to start this new week out of bed if I’m lucky but waiting to go to work and then after, my dose of the rage virus it seems, Anger Burns Hotter Than Lust.

Monday, September 24, 2018

Episode 085 ~Anger Burns Hotter Than Lust~

Fifty-First Rule Madam Justice

How to make One Million Dollars, I wish those ideas came as fast as things I’m mad at or how quickly I get hard, though I didn’t wake up with Morning Wood, no I woke up angry that every other part of me had to get up. I read somewhere that couples shouldn’t go to bed angry, and most nights I’m not sure how I feel, though I usually tell myself stories, I go over games in my head, The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time maybe Detroit: Become Human.

Back when I had a full-time school schedule, though I remember a pretty girl here, or there it is the rage I embraced the most, and now, hell I can be angry that I don’t have time for gaming, the money for it, that I don’t have a pretty girl like North, Kara, or Chloe. I’m mad that already I feel sick and what did I do wrong, I woke up right when I wanted to, ate breakfast, I’m even talking to you this morning so why should I be in pain. How about the fact that I can’t have hope, no I’m afraid which only means I need more anger to fuel me because when I get to the day job, what happens then?

Wouldn’t indifference be worse, I either want your head on a stick or your head on a… yeah it’s easier to talk about hate as always, people more often than not prefer my misery and they want it with me smiling. Me and my dumbass smile, THIS I CANNOT DO (anymore) I mean, so either I’m a pervert, a psycho, but never a person and strangely enough that makes me mad because do I honestly want to be like any person I know nowadays. Everyone I like is suffering, the man I am, I still hate, which goes perfectly with hating the majority of human beings so yes indeed I enjoy looking at beautiful things.

The Beautiful People, maybe that’s why I want anger because I want to feel something other than anything to be ashamed of right; being mad makes me damn well normal but pictures of bodies one way or another gets you kicked off Pinterest but not today. For now, I’m angry that this day isn’t going as planned but I am in more control dear Madam Justice, surprisingly this rage and Anger Burns Hotter Than Lust.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 084 ~Will Take The Wheel~

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To think I can go anywhere I want, and I would prefer to stay in bed instead of putting these hands to work but I did take a step in the right direction, and maybe I can make another one this week. “Will Take The Wheel.”

Sunday, September 23, 2018

Episode 084 ~Will Take The Wheel~

To Will:
How to make One Million Dollars, coming from someone with a “history” of numbers that’s rich; no pun intended or maybe it is because if it’s not the 1, 2, 3’s it’s A, B, C, and of all the words not to like, DISCOMBOBULATED looks good on you. Well I mean if this is what gets you up in the morning, though you could have gotten up earlier… one of these days will be a positive one, maybe that should be on the list, like a million dollars.

Even now you want to complain about tomorrow and the day after, what about the next, and you’re looking for that silver lining, but it always comes back to the numbers, the two movies you want to see against how much you worked last week for example. The gas in your car, plus the two wheels that need replacing, and the money in your wallet and every excuse that I want to throw at you currently; If I Were A Rich Man. Complaining about cash is a big sign of adulting, especially in America, when your only concern becomes about money and how I wish for you that it overwhelms even your lust; because words are going to make you money I believe and that means more days fighting against “other passions” Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 004 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. “I Will” Review “The Art Of Peace”
Completed
4. I Will Eat Breakfast Every Day
Failed
5. I Will Finish “Church.” By Stylo Fantome
Completed
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”
Failed

Well look at that, I said positive, and already last week I broke 17.5 to a solid 34 F one foot in front of the other, but you have to move faster, not quite as “quickly” as you Fapping nowadays ha, but again you need the car. Hell, the words should be even harder considering the tragedies besetting you from all sides, but you will no longer apologize for things that you aren’t responsible for to anybody and no that doesn’t go on the list. This week you might even get three things done, even if the book; yeah more negativity, no state the facts the erotica book club wanted to read another m/m and a long one at that, did I say that… words; but these Six Impossible Things.
1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Review “Ven” (V Games) Ker Dukey and K. Webster
4. I Will Review “Life Itself”
5. I Will Finish “Under His Heel.” By Adara Wolf
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”

Again other things should make this list but the point is to maintain control of yourself but you must also know when to let loose like I didn’t, I want people in the ground and yet I remained silent because the lady at work lost her husband. Respect right, but who respects you, such a concept comes from those that find themselves in; no, those who seize control and that is what you must do so Will Take The Wheel.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 079 ~Will To Be Selfish~

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Possession, love can make us do some incredible things, right or horrible, “Stuff And Thangs” as Rick Grimes would put it and indeed it brings us back to life in some ways at least *cough* Life Itself. Will To Be Selfish

Tuesday, September 18, 2018

Episode 079 ~Will To Be Selfish~

Dear Future Wife,
How to make One Million Dollars though I’m not sure that my organs are worth that much… don’t turn all squeamish on me now, though if you ever mention Pig Feet or Chitterlings I’ll want a divorce, same if you ever say Roll Tide or War Eagle. Not that Alabama is forever, and as long as we’re together it doesn’t even matter honestly, though I’m looking at Nevada, California, and for some reason New York but you know I hate being cold, another reason I want you all to myself, my love.

“I love you… but I may not be equipped to be loved this much.” Life Itself (2018) Abby, Olivia Wilde

Professional Wrestling is an acceptable sport, right behind the Olympics and Martial Arts competitions “The Karate Kid,” “Cobra Kai,” “Best of The Best” and don’t get me started on my fixation with Kung-Fu, but I’m in a “Life Itself” state of mine FUCK… what they said it a bunch. Anyway so back to wrestling or more like reality TV “Total Bellas” when Nikki’s family was always telling John Cena to compromise, but they didn’t know what that meant, it doesn’t mean surrender, nor submission, or sacrifice. Which brings my point because I believe love is a sacrifice, but when two people love each other, when they give everything of themselves leaving nothing it should feel like you have everything you’ll ever need and even more.

“You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.” The Princess Bride (1987)

I think I’ve told you this before and I know that I can be a bit much to handle that’s why I admire your strength so much, Beauty & the Beast, do you know how incredible she had to be, to fight so hard, and loved even harder, the way that I love you. It can be scary; I keep thinking about when we first met, what did I have to give, and Suddenly I have smiles to give away, and what did I say about cold and now my arms are around you, and is that my hoody? Strange the times I want to cover you up, and then I want to show you off, but you’re all mine… beast, yeah I’m like your shadow, a ghost that haunts you, a zombie and dare I say you’re the prettiest necromancer I have ever seen.

“I’m not afraid. I’m not afraid of anything.”

“I’m only alive when you’re inside me.” Angel “Waiting In The Wings”

Only one fucking demon, is it Halloween yet; yeah, I’m going to have some old white lady screaming at me like that poor studio guy at the screening last night, but as I heard once, it’s a disease this thing called love, a confession, a belief. It transcends everything baby girl, even my words and my phone *gasps*, and I do want to be hoarded, kept away, lost to everything, and so I ask this important question, do you have, the Will To Be Selfish.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 078 ~Find People Worth Suffering For~

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Today’s word is ow, I should probably say sin, sacrifice, and suffering but yes pain encompasses all that, and I’m not suffering for anyone but me and who the Hell am I honestly? Find People Worth Suffering For

Monday, September 17, 2018

Episode 078 ~Find People Worth Suffering For~

Fiftieth Rule Madam Justice

How to make One Million Dollars, or is he, she, or it worth that much honestly but haven’t we already covered my little boy with Rule Twenty-Four Be Who My Dog Deserves, which was also Lesson 261 I’m just saying.

Now sure I want plenty of things and there was a time I spent afternoons at the track for horse racing, and then I fell into Blackjack, Poker is a bit more complicated but speaking of which I’m sure I’ve told you about the Blackjack Scale I use when it comes to people… Anyway this morning I was thinking about The Purge and The V Games from “Ven” by Ker Dukey and K Webster, and it’s a tossup between what I would do to protect another person over what I would do for let’s say revenge. Either way, people bring about sin, sacrifice, and yes suffering and while I would go through Hell for a laugh what would I do for another’s happiness, in the end, be the joke *sigh*?

I look back at some of my poetry, and I can see that while in one way I so wish to honor women, I do the exact opposite, but still, those words were hours off my life, things better left unsaid perhaps but women are always talking about a man’s time. Hell Madam Justice, the time I have spent doing things this morning, I’m not proud of, but like most of my gender I am an idiot and believe you me every day I’m Hustlin’. Nah the keyword is suffering.

So what makes a person worth suffering for; as I clued in “Indiana Gone” a friend is a girl you haven’t slept with yet or a guy willing to throw punches in your defense and as always I’ve avoided doing any fighting. Hatred is suffering, but so is love, so the real question is which hurts more, and I answer love but what person do I love, does need even count, I hope not. If I’m breaking this rule by not searching for somebody to like, is there anyone out there looking for me, and I’m sure the Christians would say Jesus, but you do know you’re talking to someone skilled in all manners of Torture Methodology Dear Madam Justice.

Of course, I have no problem finding people to hate, but that fire, while it burns, is but a candle for today because what will I be doing after this… suffering still especially if I plan on going to the movies tonight; what might happen, Find People Worth Suffering For

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 077 ~A Well Written Check~

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Already I know this is not my best work, I’m sure the first time I wrote this out I said something profound and inspirational but no, as with my goal of having a million dollars I’m just signing my name and handing this off. A Well Written Check

Sunday, September 16, 2018

Episode 077 ~A Well Written Check~

To Will:
How to make One Million Dollars, well to start I definitely would not be talking to you again; one conversation a week right and as much as I want to blame Grammarly, we can chalk this one up to human error, yeah such stupidity, so do I condemn you or me? Well if anything the point of the story is to save, as I said before *sigh* I knew you wouldn’t forget about the concept that I came up with last night which is merely by this time next year you are going to be a millionaire right?

That’s right, and here you are unable to save your work, to write you need to bleed, and these pages are the bandages, and here you are reopening the wound that you already cleansed, what more of a definition of self-harm is there? How about going to the day job you hate, how the General Manager would love to hear you say that, it would give him more of an excuse to fire you but keep thinking about this time, where will you be? I know I said something about Carl Johnson (CJ) and “hardcore gangster shit!” that kept me sane when dealing with Dumb, Dumber, Dumbest and I could use some tunes right now or more YouTube virus watching (actually watching fictional diseases), but you know Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 005 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed (Day 004 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. “I Will” Review “The Art Of Peace”
Failed
4. I Will Eat A Bowl Of Cereal Every Day Before Leaving Here
Failed
5. I Will Finish “Ven” by Ker Dukey and K. Webster
Completed
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush” (Novel)
Failed

I know this is not what you needed to hear again, the same failures reiterated twice but hell considering how much time you wasted today… does Karma work when the only person you’re hurting is yourself? Yeah besides sleeping what did you do today, you said something else about “Stuff And Thangs” Pinterest boards this, edging away to actresses that, and that you need better role models other than zombie killers, and GTA gangsters to be sure. Too bad you still haven’t come up with an idea to make that million you’re going to make within eleven months and some change, though this only popped into my head last night with these Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 004 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. “I Will” Review “The Art Of Peace”
4. I Will Eat Breakfast Every Day
5. I Will Finish “Church.” By Stylo Fantome
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush”

Yeah, this week is off to a fantastic start, but already you’re proving you’re lazy as how long did this conversation take before but you are experiencing firsthand what rage can do to a person and if you can keep this same fire about everything you do this week? Find a pretty girl to call you skeevy, talk about opening the wound again or find four black men to piss you off but The Man Right “Chea” is doing fine isn’t that right, with a 17.5 F someday maybe you’ll have, A Well Written Check.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 073 ~Rage Against The Will~

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This song says “love is the answer” but that will be true when there’s no one left to hate and on the day to day I find only hatred and no I ain’t scared of no sheet, no confederate flag, or swastika, no my enemy is my own. Rage Against The Will

Wednesday, September 12, 2018

Episode 073 ~Rage Against The Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
Give Me One Reason not to because I have said before like the “Lord Of War” you can’t fight your biology; to think last week it was a crime that scared me to death and this week it’s a crime of death, and I am not afraid. Maybe I should be but I can’t, and that’s my first sin, the fact that I want this more than anything, my blood to boil, to burn, and indeed want to breathe, believe in RAGE.

Rage
Everywhere
I feel it
Can’t help it
It burns
Through my heart
And my soul

Rage
Consumes me
Every look
Every smile
I want it done
Tears
Don’t fall

Rage
The pain
Insane
I must be
Death
Theirs or mine
Don’t care

Rage
Such a
Misery (the poem RAGE)

Like sex it’s a biological imperative and especially in America a more socially acceptable one, nearly once a week it overcomes someone for one reason or another so what is that for me, you want to know, do you honestly, because none of them do. Every work day I have people coming up to me asking how I’m doing but today there was nothing, maybe they could sense it, I know I still do, and like sex, I know neither, sin, satiation, or satisfaction. So why do I feel this way… some say laughter is one great medicine and no I won’t sit here and say don’t laugh, hell Inspector Echo it’s my best form of camouflage, I type out LOL a dozen times minimum, I might indeed mean it, I even call myself Le Marquis De Joker on occasion…

And I would call it a plague
how this fever infects
me, I sweat

summoning up the blood
which can never assuage
the disgust, the dirt, my name is mud.

Better though, tears for fears,
than this need to purge, to clear.
I lock the monster in its cage

the white walls of the page.
A mad world of ink,
kink, mystique, doublethink

Don’t rage, rage (the poem Vial Rage)

“Oh yeah! I love jokes! I love all kinds of jokes. But you know what I don’t like? I don’t like people trying to kill me, hurting my family and my friends, and destroying the whole world as I know it. That just doesn’t sit well with me.” Toys (1992)

“If you ever loved me, don’t rob me of my hate. It’s all I have.” The Count of Monte Cristo

My second crime today is the fact that I have let this go on for too damn long, in the name of getting along, of professionalism, of attempting to be a decent human being, see I learned something today, these aren’t people I’m dealing with now. I swear I would make a great Neo-Nazi or KKK member because I was ready to scream… okay speaking of crimes, that might account for hate speech and nobody reads this anyway but again being reasonable. Lastly, when did this start, you know Inspector Echo I have no problem giving orders, but I am not an ignorant leader, and if there is one thing in this great big world I can’t stand it’s looking, feeling, and knowing, I’m STUPID.

Stupidity my greatest sin of all, so no Inspector Echo you don’t have to forgive me for my rage, no I’ll happily go to Hell for that, but I apologize for the time, for wanting these motherfucking moronic assholes to die (nothing racial there right) and for being so stupid, I Rage Against The Will.

“Dear Lord, Please forgive us for all the sins we have brought upon us. And look down upon us with forgiveness for the sins we will have in the future. I know you understand that niggas ain’t perfect, but we try lord. We try to keep our heads up in bad times. This is a bad time, show us the way. And if you can’t show us the way, then forgive us for being lost.” Sweet Pea, Baby Boy (2001)

I Will Have No Fear