Tag: Man

Gospel 048 ~Will Needs His Space~

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I get pretty tongue-tied when I talk to women, and then I go ahead and write something like this… It’s a reason I wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid, and people call me a headcase. Will Needs His Space.

Tuesday, August 18, 2020

Gospel 048 ~Will Needs His Space~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so how can I be mad? Well, I know quite a few Republicans that hate so much more. Only I don’t want to speak about hate because I love you. Talk about Doublethink, I tell you all the time you take my breath away. Sometimes it’s like I’ll overflow with everything about you. Today though, it was like being in love with the stars, how high can I go. It was like loving a grave. Make no mistake, I would die for you. I was reminded of that poem Suicide’s Note.

“The calm,
Cool face of the river
Asked me for a kiss.” –

Langston Hughes

You’re not “Equipped” to be loved this much. Well, you did marry me, after all. Now you know I come out of nowhere with my music, but today I want to share my favorite song with you, one anyway. It’s called Moondust (Stripped; EP Version) by Jamyes Young. He sings about burying his love, and for some reason, this stands out to me. It’s not only because of my novel. I named “The Business,” “The Moondust.” I’ve been thinking about how many friends I’ve lost and how I’m always afraid that someday you’ll leave. One wrong word, and it’ll be like something out of the movie “Pontypool.” You say I’m a hard man to know, and I want to be so close but not today. Hell all the movies, music, my manuscript, to tell you the truth. Okay then, I’m mad as Hell, My Love.

That’s what I’m burying, this rage that I feel at so many that I know it would send you running. As the song goes, I bury my love to give the world to you. I won’t have you rob me of my hate, but I can’t give it to you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ntzBE9nAKfU

I bury my tears everywhere else but not where you can see them. A man ain’t supposed to cry; yeah, another song. I need to lie down, though, and I don’t know if you or my firstborn could help me.


I bury myself in my work… no, not like that. Let me work harder or, as people say, all work and no play. I need some awesome video game carnage, and does that make me sound like a kid again.

Now that’s what I won’t do? I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that. I keep burying the man I am, and for what? I love you.

Only Will Needs His Space.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 047 ~Temptation Exist In All Creations~

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I wouldn’t do much for a Klondike bar, but I think the same company makes that strawberry cheesecake bar too, and I have raised holy hell for those. The only thing tempting me now is my bed. “Temptation Exist In All Creations” no doubt

Monday, August 17, 2020

Gospel 047 ~Temptation Exist In All Creations~

Hundred And Fiftieth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and I’m lucky I got the money. What would I spend it all on? Do you really need to ask? Three words AHEM, Breasts, Yabbos, Titties, pardon my language, Madam Justice. Hell, My Dæmon is my son, and he’s exactly like his old man. You could ask Indiana Gone about that. Now, of course, he wants a lot of different things and is willing to commit any variety of sins. He loves to eat pretty much anything.

Every morning he’ll fight me for his walk. The boy will lie for a treat. So what tempts me other than a world of Yabbos?

Sad to say, but everything in this “wonderful” world leads right back to that goal. The sooner we finish this talk, the sooner I can look at Yabbos. Yeah, right, like Instagram wasn’t already showing me hot cheerleaders to look up. Guilty as charged. Now all of my creations only want to live, but that means I need to be horny. Sorry to say but this afternoon I’m only annoyed. You do know what would help with that, only I have to stay awake. That’s my point, though. Everything wants to live. What is the ultimate expression of that I ask? You give life to others, and of course, there are many different ways one can go about that endeavor.

For the most part, humanity only values life as it relates to death. The closer we get to the end, the more we cling to life. I could argue against that, though, given the current state of the world, I suppose. I don’t want to get political though. 170,000 dead, and the life I cherish the most isn’t human. Again I bring up my firstborn. I say he wants everything, but at any particular moment, he wants me. No girl could ever take his place. Still, I wish some girl found me tempting, I don’t think about love most days. Ask me what tempted me in these past twenty-four hours. Pigtails, food, my bed? Maybe it’s not the temptation itself but the motive behind it. I remember something from the Isaku series that I dare not repeat, but I understand.

Hell, the things we will do for such desires and how we fight to resist, rebel, and renounce sin. They can also be blessings, but I know what I want. Temptation Exists In All Creations.

“The world, chico, and everything in it.” – Tony Montana

“This is a rebellion; I rebel.” – Jyn Erso “Rogue One”

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 045 ~Big Willie Style, NOT~

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No, I’m not getting jiggy with it, but how I wish. It’s ten at night already, and I haven’t been getting to bed until after two in the morning, and I know why. One of these days, the answer will be zombies, and I’ll be living. “Big Willie Style, NOT”

Saturday, August 15, 2020

Gospel 045 ~Big Willie Style, NOT~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and Will Smith isn’t? Now how would I accomplish this, seeing as how I couldn’t climb out of bed today? I know I say that a lot Lady Luna but I did go and get a couple of Honey Chicken Biscuits this morning. Yeah, making up for last week. Are they good enough but not my writing? I ask you? Is everything better than anything I can do? So what’s with the depression and the questions? One head has been busier than the other since Monday.

I have these phases when I get heavy into NO FAP, and now I know why. Excuse my language Lady Lu, this is more for Inspector Echo, but I am FUCKING Mad. Tuesday morning, I was at the Day Job listening to sad songs that turned into rap. I’m an African-American man, but that doesn’t mean I know anything about rap, but most of what I chose was angry. Now, if that’s not enough to scare “white” people, I’ve also been reading. No, not, The Manual: What Women Want and How to Give It to Them. Yesterday it put me to sleep. Instead, I’ve been looking over The Screwfly Solution. Let me guess, now I sound like one of those women-hating Incels, right? Hell Lady Lu, I’m not mad at anyone but me. This brings me back to the point; I’m only punishing myself again.

Instead of working like Will Smith, I’m doing me, which means sleeping. I won’t finish our conversation until later on tonight. No disrespect to people who have other addictions, but it’s like rehab. There’s nothing inside and what’s outside isn’t right. Speaking of outside, this is still the plague era. Porn is like a vaccine, you’re infected, and at the same time, you’re fighting the onslaught. If you knew how many times I’ve searched for Tifa Lockhart in the past few minutes. When I’m outside though, SIGH. THEY say the problem is men don’t look at women as people. Nowadays, I look at them as monsters. People have always been zombies to me, now I’m only running faster. Why can’t you just be normal? People cry over and over again.

When has anyone saw me as such and what they do see me as well, they “Make Me Wanna Die.”

They’re disappointed, Will Smith, W. Anton; Big Willie Style, NOT.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 044 ~Mo Willy, Mo Genre~

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Someone once said, Mo Money, Mo Problems, I say, come give me the drama. I would be “happy” if my writing brought me both and who knows what else. To this day, I dare to call what I write erotica, and everything else is honesty. “Mo Willy, Mo Genre.”

Friday, August 14, 2020

Gospel 044 ~Mo Willy, Mo Genre~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now, or I could be if I took to heart the words of some famous authors. Napoleon Hill, Dale Carnegie, W. Anton, to name a few. Didn’t I once ask the legitimacy of listening to a bunch of white guys (is W. Anton white) I don’t know?

Anyway, when it comes to reading nonfiction books, it’s usually some white guy leading the way. No wonder my country is so screwed. Don’t worry, though, Lady Sophia, I’m not diving into politics today. Hell, if I woke up earlier, which I can say about a lot of people. At least on my Amazon List, I made a note to add a lot of black authors. Again though, I’m late to the party. I can’t get it up to read a book that has to be in my top five of all time. I even found the audio addition this afternoon. Yes, I’ve been asleep that long today, that’s lazy. You know the whole truth will set you free concept.

Knowing the truth seems to be a never-ending struggle. I’m only trying to pull that other person outside of me as my motivations preach. His story Lady Sophia has yet to be told… he remains lying in bed this moment.

Speaking of my writing, which is all fiction except for my conversations with you and the girls. Oh yes, girls, if anything today, I’m still thinking about that Nurse and Kimono girl from Kojin Taxi (Sex Taxi). When it comes to my novels, I will admit women are usually the victims. The exceptions being the Basic Bitch and Cherry, who were both villainesses. For somebody that can’t get it up to write. Here I am imagining a third novel involving Cherry, and before she gets a big head, how many does the Basic Bitch have?

I try to write “sweet” Lady Sophia. Notice I didn’t say I want to. I attempted to write a YA novel some time ago, which led to nowhere. Don’t they all? I wonder who holds the pen or pushes the buttons. You’re not Dirty Diana but one hand to my work, the other on my penis. My art could be funny, but most comedians delve into the truth. All I want is hilarious animal voiceovers from Tony Baker and John Hunt. I should be writing.

LSV, SEX, 666 always with Yabbos; Mo Willy, Mo Genre.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 042 ~I’ve Offended There Will~

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Well, this is the third song I’ve written in my whole life, and like the last two, it isn’t anywhere close to excellent. It’s been echoing in my head since MILF Tres. “I’ve Offended There Will” with all respect to Johnny Cash

Wednesday, August 12, 2020

Gospel 042 ~I’ve Offended There Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but it’s not because I reworked a song.

I’ve Offended There – (I’ve Been Everywhere by Johnny Cash)

Talking to some girl, that left me right here alone
Another night, another chance, I’ve found out again I’ve blown.
Wondering, what word I said, that made it go right to wrong.
So before I cried, I decided to write this oh so awful song.
Is there a place, from here to there, somewhere in this whole world?
Where who I am, and what I say, don’t scare some pretty girl

I’ve offended there, man.
I’ve offended there, man.
Hurt some feelings, scared, man.
What, I tried to share, man.
To be with her, I dared, man.
I’ve offended there.

I’ve tried with
Texting, Messenger, Whisper, Snapchat
Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, Playstation,
Bumble, Twitter, Youtube, Onlyfans,
Patreon, Craigslist, FanCentro, Amazon,
iCloud, Android, Subscribeadult, Pornhub,
Email, POF, and Tinder, I’m a sinner.

I’ve offended there, man.
I’ve offended there, man.
The time I could have spared, man.
But summer’s day compared, man.
She was not prepared, man.
I’ve offended there.

I’ve talked to
D in school, Sweetness, Harmonic War, All That Jazz,
Basic Bitch, Rainbow Girl, Okay, Liz Vicious,
MILF Uno, MILF Dos, MILF Tres, Capital A,
Special K, Ruby Rae, Nude Maids, Moms In Lots,
M Anime don’t want to play, Pornstars, Escorts,
Cosplayers, Alice Little, Cherry, but I’ me

I’ve offended there, man.
I’ve offended there, man.
Their hearings not impaired, man.
All I’ve said, not fair, man.
Communications erred, man.
I’ve offended there.

Well, I’ve been,
Blocked, Deleted, Warned, Threatened
Banned, Barred, Locked Out, Told Off,
Erased, Trolled, Hacked, Ignored,
Called Names, Punked, Rejected, Bothered,
Forgotten, Denied, Left broken, Annoyed,
Framed, Will’s my name.

I’ve offended there, man.
I’ve offended there, man.
Because I want her bare, man.
I tell the truth, declared, man.
All these women flared, man.
I’ve offended there.

I’ve talked of
Movies, Music, Favorite Books, Writing them,
Love Letters, Good Morning, Hello, Poems at night,
Furry son, life and such, Pop Culture, Pokemon,
Have some fun, Yabbos, Nakedness, Money,
Pretty Clothes, Bedrooms, Lifestyle, Sex them up,
Wish List, Fucking, Dirty things, so I sing

I’ve offended there, man
I’ve offended there, man
Missing them but spared, man.
Who I am is squared, man.
But hearts are not repaired, man.
I’ve offended there.
I’ve offended there.

Well, I’ve Offended There Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 041 ~Will, You Button Up~

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The beginning of a new week and even now I don’t want to talk about it. Every word I say… at least tonight, I don’t have to bother with a poem. I’m also keeping my pants firmly buttoned, or tied, sweat pants. “Will, You Button Up”

Tuesday, August 11, 2020

Gospel 041 ~Will, You Button Up~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and that’s because I push buttons for a living. I have those of my characters, my customers; yours Cara mia. Funny, I should bring up Gomez Addams’s pet name for his wife. I ask you plenty of things, but today the question is, are you afraid? I know that I am. Now before I burst into a rendition of that’s all I ask of you, I have some demands. I would do Anything for Love, but I will not be made a fool of. My Love, you must have courage. What I am learning again is this. I will not beg.

You want to know what scares me? One day I’m going to return home and have to ring my own freaking doorbell. Baby girl, you know my views on cursing. Anyway, the point is I think someday you’ll go and change the locks on me and I don’t know why. It might be some other guy hell some girl than is buttoning up, my kids for school. The idea that my family might be taken away from me well. You’ve seen me with my Firstborn, and you know what I would do to protect every little hair on his head. It horrifies me, the thought of something happening to you, Baby Doll. Ask any friend, ask my father, who I hope you’ll never meet. When I say the word “always,” I mean it. Sticking with my musical motif, I would fight, lie, walk the wire, and die for you. Should I shut-up or button up?

One of my heroes, Dennis Hof, he talked about being “mother fucked.” Pardon my language, but what he said was that when a person betrayed him, they stopped existing. What if you asked me to give up my dreams? To send it all crashing down at the push of a button? My Love if with this life I did it “My Way,” I would never button my pants again. There is no way I would leave this bed being with you. Didn’t one of The Beatles pull that off? Which brings me to today or indeed last night. One more friend gone, blocked, deleted, gone. When I dared to speak of it, somebody else disappeared. Will I be a man of courage or a hard man to know? Will you say, “Will, You Button Up?”

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 040 ~Sometimes The Words Are WTF~

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I’ve never been one for swearing, but I promise you not a day goes by that I don’t mutter WTF at the smallest to the hugest things like a few minutes ago. “Sometimes The Words Are WTF,” and sometimes it’s best not to say anything at all now

Monday, August 10, 2020

Gospel 040 ~Sometimes The Words Are WTF~

Hundred And Forty-Ninth Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and that in and of itself is the concept of WTF. Hell, if you told me when I was a child, I would be right here, SIGH. I don’t want to be a downer Madam Justice but if I only knew… Well, WTF, I’m trying to explain.

As the song goes, “I Feel STUPID.” Take the everyday mundane, like the General Manager running the truck crew. She didn’t remember how to anymore, and there I stood knowing everything. What about the time I wanted to take control of the speaker and play music? Speaking of play, MILF Tres, aka Special K. Every morning I tell her hello, every night I send her a poem from GULP. Now the girl has every reason to ignore me. I checked in on MILF Dos, once or twice, and she blocked me. Should I continue saying, Hi? There’s also the fact that I’m up. Am I talking to you, instead of crawling back into my bed? Is it the fact that I got very close to getting six hours last night? You could call it my envy that I saw Katie o’ Shaughnessy from Youtube getting free stuff from Skybound, WTF.

Yeah, and just like that Madam Justice, I’m turned on. Not only by her but Indiana Evans (Blue Lagoon: The Awakening). Let’s also throw in Sofia Kasuli (Teen Starlet) thank you. Now when I get to “make love” to beautiful women like them, then WTF is this real life? When/If I ever publish one of my many books and start to make some real money? What would it be like to never be scared of walking into the Day Job again because I can leave? Who would I be if I could pay my parents off and say after, “I don’t ever want to see you again?” Of course, I have to turn it right back around to women again. Can I ever say WTF, I’m in love? Yet what would get me, is some girl telling me that she’s in love with the man I see in the mirror every day. Can’t say I know the feeling at all.

A few minutes ago, I told myself I would be reading now. I can commit to the Day Job but to keep a promise to myself or My Dæmon SIGH. Sometimes The Words Are WTF.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 038 ~A Touch Of Will~

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Promises of soft hands. The feel of fresh sheets and the little fuzzball that’s running around here when my kid isn’t plopped down in my lap. SIGH, if only I would publish my book, I’d have all the space in the world. “A Touch Of Will”

Saturday, August 8, 2020

Gospel 038 ~A Touch Of Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so you would think I have a touch of class. It’s been my experience that I find a touch of cash a lot more palatable. I’m sure I’ve told this story quite a few times. When I was a child, I’d dole out hugs for money.

So what, unconditional love isn’t enough? Now when it comes to my childhood, I wasn’t too keen on “puppies,” either. Not talking about Yabbos, hell, I’ve loved them since I first saw a “Jet” magazine. I mean actual dogs. I came back from school once and found my grandparents had gotten a dog. I suppose most children would be ecstatic. In my experience, I went running scared and jumped on the bed, where he couldn’t reach. Okay, so why am I waning all nostalgic? I Love My Dæmon Like Pancakes always and forever, but oh, give me patience. He’s an old man that only wants to be close to me, but sometimes it’s like I can’t breathe. The last thing I wish in this life is to be alone. Even now, I feel smothered today.

Is it any wonder that I’m enjoying living in this, our plague era? Why even now I wait for the zombie hordes to descend. How about taking my chances when it comes to The Purge? What about the fact that I’m into BDSM? Yes, I know Lady Lu that I broke again last night. It was a mix between MILF Tres, Momokun, Cherry, and St. Louis Luxurious Wheels. One of these girls is not like the other, am I right? My point is this. I can’t stand for something, someone so beautiful to touch me physically or emotionally, I know.

People say I wear my heart on my sleeve. My grandma would say I have so much pride. Someone even told me I have an ego. How can one person feel so insignificant? Yet in the same breath, see themselves as the center of the universe? It’s like my light is the size of a mustard seed. My face is that of The Hunchback of Notre Dame. I cover that with the most monstrous things I can imagine. The concept is they all hurt in one way or another, and my body can’t take it.

Yes, I’m touchy but money, mammaries, and my mattress? If but A Touch Of Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 037 ~Mother Of Excuses Will~

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Even if I made that billion dollars I’m always professing to have, I’m sure my Mom would not be pleased I live my life “This Way.” Only being a starving artist ain’t winning me any points either. “Mother Of Excuses Will”

Friday, August 7, 2020

Gospel 037 ~Mother Of Excuses Will~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I should be reading more. One of my favored motivations talks about how Warren Buffett reads for six hours a day. We all know that Oprah Winfrey is obsessed with books. I wanted to fashion myself after Bill Gates and at least read a book a week. Here it is another Friday, and I haven’t picked up my latest book, “Too Late.” Once again, I haven’t looked at “For A Fine, Cherry Spread” since I won Camp NaNoWriMo. Now the question is, why haven’t I? My how time flies.

As the song goes, “I came up with a million excuses.” No, Lady Sophia, I don’t miss the Day Job. As a matter of fact, I’ve been kicking myself all this week, worrying. Dale Carnegie must be rolling in his grave. I don’t see myself as Asa Jackson and his obsession with Sloan. Let’s keep it real. Every Erotica I read, the guy is “infatuated” with the girl. You know what I wanted to say, but Grammarly would have dinged me for using the same word. Anyway, MILF Tres, aka Special K, said she wanted a guy “passionate” about her. I am… with seeing her Yabbos again and totally naked. Sigh, before I head down a Dirty Diana train of thought, hell, it’s taken me a week to clear my inbox. I’m almost there. Only would my mother be proud?

That leads me to today and the reason I’m not reading or writing. What we’re doing, Lady Sophia is having a conversation. Last night, I had this bad dream, which is pretty different because it was one of my “Sexxx Dreams” thanks, Lady Gaga. Did I ever mention how kickass Sick Fux By Tillie Cole is? So I was doing something pretty “effed” up. I’m not sure what it could have been… well, again, I’m trying to keep it in my pants. In the dream, though, my Mom caught me, and um, that was that. You know how I conceive any vision, Lady Sophia. They serve as messages, most of the time, warnings. This dream might not even have anything to do with my mother. Yesterday I was talking about MILFS Uno, Dos, and Tres. All I know is, this morning, I wanted to get back reading. If only to dream of something other than the Mother Of Excuses Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Gospel 035 ~Will’s Behind The Times~

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Most of my life is spent trying to keep my behind out of the fire. While I’ve accepted the fact that I’m going to Hell, second circle, if anything, I’m still so hot here and not because of the plague. Will’s Behind The Times.

Wednesday, August 5, 2020

Gospel 035 ~Will’s Behind The Times~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I don’t have to rely on WebMD. For the record, I don’t recommend anyone read WebMD. There’s a reason I now know what Proctitis is. Let’s just say Ranch Wings and Ghost Pepper Sauce, while tasty is not a good combo. You also know Inspector Echo; I am not one for toilet humor. I’m getting it out of the way, at least. As per usual, I get a lot grosser gee I wonder why. By the end of this week, I suppose I’ll be crying about a girl again.

Another one, you say? She broke me. I’ll admit, well no, it was Talin Shields (Blow Slow Talin) that did it. If you look her up, that’s your fault. Anyway, Talin broke my streak, and the new girl broke me last night. I’ve been burning ever since restarting NO FAP and all. I need to be mindful when it comes to my shifts in mood. My Dæmon is being a little badass, and I don’t know why. He didn’t get to sleep in my bed last night, and as we speak, he has his behind on the floor. I can’t explain it but considering I’m out of bed for once. Now I’m still running behind schedule, and you know how I hate being late for anything. It’s not like you’re paying me and speaking of which, what about the things I want to do for a living? I haven’t even looked at “For A Fine, Cherry Spread” since Camp NaNoWriMo.

If you’re looking for something a little more light-hearted? Okay, let’s consider I have a heart how about Starbucks Frappuccino? I had a craving yesterday, so I bought a four-pack, but they’re smaller than the standard bottle. Imagine my surprise and annoyance. Hell, I’m looking for anything to avoid talking about how I stabbed myself in the back. Yeah, I suck at the whole, giving myself a pat on the back. Now you remember MILF Dos, and who doesn’t? I was trying to be kind to her by speaking every day. Well, now we don’t speak at all. So yeah, I have the new girl and what was the phrase that pissed her off. AHEM… Can’t believe you live like this. At least I know why she’s mad at me.

Yes, Echo I’m an ASS, always Will’s Behind The Times.

I Will Have No Fear