“The dreams in which I’m dying are the best I’ve ever had,” I had one of those last night. But for 15 years, I had my son. And over a year later, I promised another fur buddy I’d look out for him. But being brave, blessed, and better. Will You B III.
Monday, February 3, 2025
Meditation 217 ~Will You B III~
Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Braxton Barks Bradford. Daddy, you’ve eulogized, prayed, and remembered me for a week, months, four years. 1464 Days Later…
And your first thought of me is not of my passing but of my might. Why can’t every day be like this? No. You would prefer to think that “Everyday Will Be Like a Holiday.” Moments where a song like “Something Just Like This” doesn’t make you cringe or cower.
Again, when you “Woke Up This Morning,” it was not cowardice, death, or embarrassment that you wanted. No, it was courage, Daddy; enough for today.
Courageous. Thou art courageous, my father. Not only for today. Or the next few hours.
Always and forever, as you taught me. All the times, I cried but not on my last day. I didn’t. I lived bravely. I live bravely. I live in you, always, forever, your Golden Son.
How would I know such things if I were not still with you? I was there when you began reading Pierce Brown’s books. I was there as you read Satan’s Sorority Girls 8… Don’t worry, Daddy, I was asleep on your chest as usual… Why do you think Virgil moved?
“Make Room! Make Room!” But speaking of books, Daddy, what about the Bible? The Beatitudes. “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.” Is that what we’re doing here, Daddy? We are not men of faith. Didn’t you call yourself an atheist too?
But then you would tell anybody and everybody that a soul like mine couldn’t vanish.
Daddy is always right because I didn’t. I’m with you, the Jung-bae to your Gi-hun.
I need you to believe in better, not only in your bravery and courage, or that you will be blessed. I need you to believe that you will make it through. Well, everything… You’re Dad.
Yes, it is Grandpa that has you all up in arms. As if I don’t remember. Literally! Grandpa would stop by when you weren’t here, and maybe, just maybe, I wasn’t so brave, Dad, ha.
But you would walk in, and I’d leap into your arms, and I knew you would protect me, Dad. Because that’s what Dads do. Such a thought… And you do that now, always and forever, by being who you’ve always been, even if you don’t believe it. Brave, blessed, and better. Will You B III
“My son, my daughter, now that you bleed, you shall know no fear, no defeat, only victory. Your cowardice seeps from you. Your rage burns bright. Rise, warrior of Gold, and take with you your Color’s might.”
― Golden Son
“Death twitches my ear;
‘Live,’ he says…
‘I’m coming.”
Virgil
1464 Days Without B III, Day 905 of Virgil’s Arrival
Always and Forever,
Your Son