Tag: Power

Episode 057 ~Your Wish, Is Their Command~

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Written and done, spoken and accomplished, if I were going to open my mouth, I would want to be one giving all kinds of orders, but there is a reason I am not the boss of a lot of things and people. Your Wish Is Their Command

Monday, August 27, 2018

Episode 057 ~Your Wish, Is Their Command~

Forty-Seventh Rule Madam Justice

Give Me One Reason to pray, to wish, to write letters to Santa and then I talk about having no faith in the human race. I include myself in that. Then again people have rarely treated me as though I deserve such consideration. To be honest, since I have known treatment less than a man. Is it any wonder that I want to be more than one? I’m sure all fictional writers have looked at themselves as so much the better. After all, we create our universes and lives, right?

I suppose that’s where it started with me. Of course, you know what type of women inspire my female characters. What of the man who inspires most of my male protagonists? The things I want and the things I can never do. Now, this is more of a discussion for Lady Sophia. Once we enter the real world why is it that I need to trick people into buying books. I could point out authors like J.K. Rowling who knew rejection or E.L. James who people hated. Over fifty million copies and that was only one book. I don’t ask people for anything, and I don’t know what I even intended with my novel, but I do want readers and fans. Hell, I would take the infamy of Marquis de Sade, scary don’t you think?

Speaking of which I’ve talked about control and sex… well, I am dominant. People say sex is all about power, and that’s valid. Also again a chat for Dirty Diana, but these rules speak to the different facets of my life. My little man only has four, don’t crap in the house, don’t steal, when I call he shows, and don’t bite the hand that feeds you. People breed complications, yet if I have to condense all my rules down to one, well. I should start with myself; I wish I could be the man I want to be; could I demand that from myself.

Power is all that matters. Haven’t I said that before, talk about love, money, sex, whatever all these are only the forms that it takes. And whatever your poison the idea that my word is law *sigh*. So simple the thought and I can’t help it. Whether it’s over the mob, the world, a love, or yourself. The power to have all that I could desire Madam Justice in life, Your Wish Is Their Command.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 050 ~Winners Do Whatever They Want~

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Today was not a winning day, how I have dreamed a dream for hours on end but I’m only now getting to writing and not on my book mind you though I did accomplish one goal today. Winners Do Whatever They Want, but I’m not there yet.

Monday, August 20, 2018

Episode 050 ~Winners Do Whatever They Want~

Forty-Sixth Rule Madam Justice

Give Me One Reason I didn’t go to prom, besides not having a date, almost scared to death, or not believing in anything. Talk about faith, “that’s a pretty bad way to start a conversation” as Kanye West would say. What about people who aren’t winning anymore and the things I do win? I’ve never seen that movie “Eighth Grade” (thank you Regal Cinemas), but I know all about winning the QUIETEST Award. No thanks.

“Okay,” asked me about fearing success, or does my discovery scare me. I suppose it depends on how I see being a winner, and that to me equals, having the money, the power, and then the women. Typical black man Scarface logic. I was thinking about my Pinterest boards again, particularly Future Freaky Females. Yeah if I were anybody else, I would hate me. Such are fantasies, and the girls I never had. What of dreams, there was the one last night; my dream girls are always changing. When has the end of the world ever been winning? Why I still write all about it.

Anyway, I was with this girl, and we were hiding from something, and for the life of me, I can’t identify her. Other than the fact she had slight curves, a brunette or dark redhead, and she wore a short black dress. For what I know it could be Megan Fox (okay black hair) but black lingerie, this girl I used to know. Sandra Luberc, Chelsea From Casting Couch HD or this Milf that’s had me edging today. It’s like that song “When Somebody Loves You Back” that’s winning. Didn’t I say yesterday that love isn’t a prize and I don’t love those I named? Actresses, friends and enemies and I could go add on.

“To never die… And to conquer all. That is winning.”

Now my search for power leads me to this conclusion from Illyria. If there is any group that understands this, it is writers. Immortality and the few that continue to make us look like rank amateurs. If it’s love, I have my son but how much does he understand me? I would never hurt him… well, his feelings but how about my species my Justice?

I win, and somebody else has to lose, and it’s like the phrase “Just Kidding” if we’re both not laughing then it’s not funny. I read somewhere it’s not lonely at the top if you pull someone up with you. One day if I win I’ll have more time because Winners Do Whatever They Want.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 036 ~ Remember This Is Your Creation~

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Can I do better, considering I have three different worlds to live with, my writing, dealing with people, and wanting a blessed life for my dog, I’m busy but what will I create today? Remember This Is Your Creation.

Monday, August 6, 2018

Episode 036 ~ Remember This Is Your Creation~

Forty-Fourth Rule Madam Justice

Give Me One Reason and shall introduce you to my insanity, all of my writing, the little dog sleeping on my leg, my life, I wish I knew when somebody gave me the pencil and said get to work. Oh yeah, when I was a little kid and still I can’t help feeling like a child because every single time I say something I’m wrong, I wonder what my son honestly thinks about me, how much do I own outright and if that ain’t the American way my Madam Justice?

I’ve said this before that I don’t like using the word home because this isn’t my place and again I’m supposed to be grown, and yes home is where yadda, yadda, yadda but then what about my novel? Yeah, my characters are from all walks of life including myself, I’m always attempting to create another version of myself, and I can’t say I’m the best guy but what Alexa Bliss, Angie Griffin, Amber Hahn, Detroit: Become Human, to name a few. The new world comes into being upon the ashes of the old one, either if I’m burning my eye sockets from the screen, the ever-present glow, or wrapped up nice and toasty warm in my bed someday I think.

Speaking of ashes what about the mess, that’s what I’m good at, and the house isn’t looking too well with my exhaustion, but that’s what happens when you begin attempting to build something great. What about the fact that I want more kids, right now it’s my little boy and me. Creating, though I love my dog like pancakes only what about my life, again with the motivation, wanting to eat healthier, get my mind clearer. Feel Like Makin’ Love but It Takes Two that Madam Justice is creation, even God gave Adam his Eve okay maybe not a good example but do you blame the hand or the tools and no we are not getting into a discussion about the broke NRA, good news.

Creation, Madam Justice is a holy mission thus power, and how you know I want power above everything else, okay maybe not sleep but the dreams I create, not today though, no I experienced a terrible nightmare, but I did figure out what to tell Dear Future Wife and Dirty Diana. That is if I can hold onto to the blog you know the day is coming and strangely enough, rather than get my PS4 I want to save it, my brain, my ideas, soul… Remember This Is Your Creation.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 359 ~ The Force Is With You~

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We see what we wish, you can’t see air, but I still breathe right, they use the same argument for God; I’m not looking for breaths or it, I’m looking for is power, whatever it is that makes people move, myself included. “The Force Is With You”

Monday, June 25, 2018

Lesson 359 ~ The Force Is With You~

Thirty-Eighth Rule Madam Justice

Can You Love Me Again, because despite all this hate and everything else love continues to exist and no I don’t believe love is “The Force” it is not one emotion or even several, it is something much more? According to Star Wars which I am an avid fan of The Force is an energy field that connects all living things and is generated by living entities… I believe that more than any God.

I am not a religious man though I did have a period in my life when I sought out God though I mistook that for what I truly desired and that Madam Justice is power in all forms though there are some I value higher than others. “Indiana Gone” and “Okay” might argue that I favor “The Light Side” goodness, knowledge, empathy, compassion, but hatred, fear, anger, desire is more of “The Dark Side,” and I can’t avoid it. Last night was an example, I was so tired, but it was lusting for something, rather than love for myself that kept me going a while.

It all comes down to energy and mine is at its highest levels when I feel hate, when I’m hot as Hell, have you ever been afraid Madam Justice, that is the force being with you, and while fear can be a weakness considering how long I have survived it can be a fantastic strength. The same might know acknowledgment for sex, that desire can infuse you with such power always to do what you wish regardless of anything else; it gives you what it takes to win. In a word, FIRE, sometimes it warms you, you can use it to burn others, it may even consume you, but every fire needs something to keep it going, when you’re all alone it takes little, in the darkness you need the light, and when fire surrounds you, either blend in or shine brighter than ever before.

“If you want to take the island you need to burn the boats.” —Tony Robbins

Now as I said, I am not a man of faith but do you want to know what The Force is, to me it’s getting up every morning and doing this for damn near a year, writing every day and for what? With everything that has happened, it is something that says this can be different; I do not want to live this way, I do not have to die this way, not if I am with The Force and The Force is with me Madam Justice, I must remember The Force Is With You.

“I’m one with the Force, and the Force is with me.” Chirrut Îmwe, Rogue One

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 341 ~Peeping John, Dick, Willy~

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Sometimes I feel like I’m not writing, but I am merely a spectator, I guess what I saw today is still processing so I let another eye on this, you know the one, and he hasn’t anything better to do these days. Peeping John, Dick, Willy.

Thursday, June 7, 2018

Lesson 341 ~Peeping John, Dick, Willy~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
Can You Love Me Again, well if they did Quasimodo, and Lenny Levine (Just Looking) then maybe I can buy myself some absolution as well after all love is a beautiful thing, and so is destruction? Now let me preface this by saying I’m not suggesting anything illegal, though let’s be honest where were you on the day of “The Fappening” and how about these past days *cough* Amanda Seyfried *cough*.

Don’t we all love a love story, why exactly were women going to see “Magic Mike,” what made “Fifty Shades Of Grey” a big hit, why is pornography one of the cornerstones of the Internet? Is it a lack of creativity on our part, could it be merely the beauty to somehow take part in or maybe it’s jealousy which clearly shows through; might it be dreaming the impossible dream. Hell, I have a picture of a naked MILF I would choose over any stripper or porn star, and here I was about to say the realness or maybe the forbidden nature of owning such.

“Why don’t they ever a make a movie about what happens after they kiss?” Jamie

“They do, it’s called porn.” Dylan, Friends with Benefits (2011)

Sad perhaps but isn’t that how we do everything nowadays, a screen, the glass, doors, walls, everything in-between. Only such a thing is meant to be private, and then we head into fetish territory. I’ve read enough erotic novels to be that hidden camera, the paparazzi, the fly on the wall, and if I had a girl to keep for myself would I suddenly put down all the books, turn off my computer, hell I would want her reading and watching too. Sometimes I would consider myself an exhibitionist… I’m not going to bother trying to defend that, but if it sits better with some I would like to be one of those couples into PDA, hand holding, kissing, dirty words and so much more.

“It ain’t no fun if the homies can’t “see” none.” ― Snoop Dogg, feat. Nate Dogg, Kurupt, Warren G, Ain’t No Fun (If The Homies Can’t Have None) Doggystyle (1993)

Maybe it’s the fact that death has become so commonplace and yet we have to hide love and affection, we treat it as taboo and forbidden, and you know how I usually land right on one of those extremes, sex, and violence. It’s a shared intimacy for those who dare, some of my favorites being that scene in Sex Zombies by S. Wolf when the characters were hiding in the closet or “Lingerie” when Lacey watched Jason and Vanessa fuck.

“It’s Only Love,” and yes people are entitled to keep it all for themselves, I’ll be the same way “no touching” but the feeling I get “Somebody’s Watching Me,” anyway well Peeping John, Dick, Willy.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 334 ~Just A Love Machine~

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Brothels are targets and others who work in the legal sex industry by the government, but boys must have their toys, and for once I don’t mean guns. Personally, I would settle for a PS4 and a copy of Detroit: Become Human. “Just A Love Machine?”

Thursday, May 31, 2018

Lesson 334 ~Just A Love Machine~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
Can You Love Me Again, wait why am I asking, because that’s what you do right, then again you don’t ask to kiss the girl, to make love, or hell to fall in love, no wonder men and women are in serious trouble. We’ve forgotten what it means to have simple relationships, where every word can get you into trouble, the idea that we analyze and scrutinize everything, that some resort to crime because what is love and sex is mechanics.

If you’ve been listening to me these last few days, you know I have become “obsessed” yes, that’s the word some use with me but what about the new game “Detroit: Become Human” or more to the point the characters Kara, North, and Chloe. Stupid I suppose how often I fall for characters but what about real women, I wouldn’t call myself a love machine but more a laugh factory and don’t we laugh at those guys who buy “Real Dolls” yeah and I spent a year writing to Abyss Creations. You see the internet is full of companies advertising fake girlfriends, bots all over the place, and what is a dominant but someone who falls but for a submissive and uses those traits to serve themselves and the relationship?

Where would I even begin designing the perfect lover though I’m sure a few girls know my tastes and give it another year or so and there will be robotic lovers, and this is the way the world ends. Now I could tell you all about the sex, check the warning but it happens you know, a guy not being in the mood, I suppose we are the sum of our parts, the penis one way, my heart breaking, my mind angry, and most of it over a video game. I’d say I wish I was a machine and with my whole “No Fap” policy I feel like I want to explode but if I leak anything, it will be tears, sweat, or blood, not that I’m into that type of play to be sure.

Machines have been letting me down lately or more like the people who write shows since I’m only talking about TV and I didn’t have to watch that walkthrough, but I was hooked you know. I know what humans are capable of and here we are, as we created God in our image so too we develop machines, to do things that humans are having a hard time with; yes sex is one thing but *sigh* Just A Love Machine?

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 327 ~”No,” Your Safeword Please~

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No means no without question, but in this day and age, people are neglecting the issue, some are truly bad, some are cowards, and as for myself well chains and whips excite me as the song goes. “No,” Your Safeword Please for all our sakes maybe.

Thursday, May 24, 2018

Lesson 327 ~”No,” Your Safeword Please~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
Can You Love Me Again, that would be a no right, no means no, just many of the ways I respect women, though the last time a woman stopped me… yeah, I was trying to get her bra off, a scary prospect even for an experienced dominant. Horror, fear, terror, I’ve told you before we’ll have the “Ravishment” conversation, hopefully, before Lesson 365, we’re getting closer and speaking of getting close, why should I be afraid?

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing!”

“When women start to scream,
it could be misconstrued.”

“Just keep going!” ― Friends With Benefits (2011)

Social Anxiety is one thing but once I have a girl on my couch or in bed that brings about several new types of fear and unlike social anxiety I happen to like this fear, this adrenaline rush. Scared of talking to a girl I maybe but I’ve never been scared of a girl physically, and I have one that would rip my clothes off if she had a chance and another would slap me if I kissed her. Power means responsibility, desire, fear, I’m sure there is a rule in there maybe, but I would never say no to such things Dirty Diana and who does anyway when it comes to those things maybe.

“Them girls only know three words:
stop, no and don’t.” Silas

“Uh-oh, my brother.
You got those words backward.
They always tell me,
No, don’t stop!” Jamal, How High (2001)

Sometimes I’m afraid of the beast that I will unleash like something out of The Purge “Release The Beast” I’m not crazy or anything… says the man with a bunch of outfits in the closet but sometimes I want to fuck a princess, others a schoolgirl, and then again Alice In Wonderland. How it terrifies me that I might not have everything I want but when have I ever been left unsatisfied, I’m not that complicated, controlling maybe, emotional, passionate but I would never allow a girl to go wanting, and I don’t want to find myself as such. Most men would never admit to being bad lovers, as for myself; I guess you would have to ask a girl, but if I had the courage I have in the bedroom in my everyday life, I might never know fear.

I know “No” though, and I told you about wrestling with a girl once, and she stopped me, and other things but I’ve never forced myself on anyone and I never would. Only I see these men do horrific things and I get labeled as such for what, a brand of love. Green, Yellow, Red, are a bit too normal, I guess I like creative women, but anything surely beats *sigh* “No,” Your Safeword Please.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 320 ~Give Me A Hand~

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Is it supervising that I know the feeling of handcuffs or than chains and whips excite me, or how about the idea of knowing how to serve, I can be a gentleman but a man and his two hands can be or do anything? Give Me A Hand

Thursday, May 17, 2018

Lesson 320 ~Give Me A Hand~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
Can You Love Me Again, after I untie you; when you’re looking for new bras and panties. When I make my best impression of Christian Grey covering up all the things I do to you? For someone who likes holding hands, who enjoys a touch, who thinks one of the best things in the world is waking up Saturday morning and listening to 40’s and 50’s apocalyptic pop while a pretty girl touches me, I do like bondage, yeah sue me.

Wrong words in this day and age right but it’s like I tell people “if you’re not my dog, my girl, or applying for the job, don’t touch me” and when’s the last time a girl touched me? I’ve said it before, but I don’t have body issues, but I like control though I can go deeper, trust, loyalty, submission, a few of my favorite things or do I think women are honestly that dangerous? It’s not that you put a woman in chains, it’s that she doesn’t want the key, maybe it’s not that I’m afraid that she’ll hurt me. No, more to the point that she will run away so why even bother?

I’m a traditionalist as you know and I don’t oppose a one-night stand and making love well… there are a few ways to go about that, and still, I refer to Christian Grey not that I agree with Fifty Shades of Grey. I make love, but I fuck too, love is a complicated thing as well as a many-splendored thing, along with sex and we’re back to my need for control, for dominance; I guess when you spend your life as the slave you need to be the Master somewhat. Release The Beast like something out of The Purge, but it’s not for the money, it’s the thrill, the knowing, the fight; today is still not the day for the “Ravishment” conversation but yeah power.

Sex is about power but to have someone give you that power, to trust so much and not only with the act but with the aftercare, a type of control but running a bath, cleaning, sustenance, to serve after such a gift was received. You ask for a girl’s hand for a lifetime but what will I do with those hands, and with my two, that’s the question, pleasure and pain, search and discover, break and rebuild if you were to Give Me A Hand.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 310 ~ You Must Always Live Brave~

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Another lesson on fear where I should find the courage to live and I may have done so when I was but a child but with age has come a plethora of bad experiences and I’ve been down this road before. You Must Always Live Brave.

Monday, May 07, 2018

Lesson 310 ~ You Must Always Live Brave~

Thirty-First Rule Madam Justice

Can You Love Me Again, did you love me before and now you’re so afraid of losing me that anyone else can be sacrificed only to keep me safe, but how shall I ever learn to become brave? How do I even define brave, you know what would have been brave today, talking to a pretty brunette, looking a man in the eye, hell maybe speaking a little bit louder, I swear these words.

As I said before courage is merely the acceptance of fear and doing what you wish, fear is a virus and courage found and practiced daily, but some days I guess I don’t and when you miss a day… That’s why I’m always telling myself to get out, to do things that make me afraid so I must be brave yet how foolish is that to seek out fear, “Remember What Fear Taste Like.” Is it not courageous though to face down the monster that I’m always called, to learn from experience and know I am a better man because when has such ideology ever helped me in the end?

Women *sigh* at the end of the day, however, I justify them I can still call it fear, but not when I find myself in pieces, and then that’s not fear at all, that’s actual danger. Nevertheless, that must be faced down. No, I take that back, you must face it head-on but what happens after that Madam Justice, fear not being equal to danger, but I get fired, I get in a fight, people think this or that of me? What about at this particular moment, what would a brave man do, what would an intelligent man do, see that’s the thing I can’t be either because for me the rule is more often you must always survive afraid.

I want to live Madam Justice honest I do, and it’s always once I have power, once I have nothing to lose, which of course is impossible, and in this situation, I stand to lose everything. It won’t be the first rule I’ve broken, and it won’t be the last… am I saying I’m giving up; Madam Justice tell me how, is it not brave to be myself even if that man is a sniveling coward, at least I survive?

One day though, I promise you, if I ever touch life, I won’t let it go and then my friend You Must Always Live Brave.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 303 ~Remember What Fear Taste Like~

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I can’t describe it, and I could be just like everybody trembling, sweating, wanting to shut my eyes but then how would I ever make it through my day; if you only knew everything that scares me. Remember What Fear Taste Like.

Monday, April 30, 2018

Lesson 303 ~Remember What Fear Taste Like~

Thirtieth Rule Madam Justice

I Am Not Fine Today, but at least I’m not scared… entirely, because fear is a sickness; in the Bible, it says something to the tune of all have sinned but that’s not true, why should I have to pay for the first man that messed up? Fear, on the other hand, children aren’t born with that, this world infects them, and as far as a cure, there is none, no not one, if anything we can only become stronger.

We seek out fear to endure a greater one or maybe that’s just me, so I never forget the need, or the taste, as they say, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger or what doesn’t kill you had better start running. Nine times out of ten we fear things that could never conceivably hurt us, I could go all political and talk about this country’s fear of black men and why it’s us that should be afraid. I could also tell you about how many people are scared of me, why else would I think of myself as a monster, the “boy” with his head down, keeping to himself, who scares pretty girls with handwritten sentiments, who only needs enough strength to stand today.

“Fear is not real. The only place that fear can exist is in our thoughts of the future. It is a product of our imagination, causing us to fear things that do not at present and may not ever exist. That is near insanity Kitai. Do not misunderstand me, danger is very real, but fear is a choice. We are all telling ourselves a story and that day mine changed.” Cypher Raige ― After Earth

Fear is a choice Madam Justice, but like hate, there’s too damn much of it always, so what if I had the strength to stop being afraid there would still be those that fear me for being what I am. If I choose to be frightened those same people will wonder why I am terrified, with everything that I could be fearful of, a pretty girl at Walmart shouldn’t be one, a stupid bitch with a blog shouldn’t matter, the terror of losing my job. Why not become my father, who’s so afraid he allowed anger, rage, hate to consume him, Hell itself follows him but then again I usually give into lust, and that makes me even scarier right?

Courage, of course, is not the defeat of fear but merely it’s acceptance, what about power, will; dare I say, love, I’m almost tempted to say fear might be the highest power. I’ll even admit I like the look on a girl’s face in certain situations; fear can keep you awake. Of all the rules that I have this one is probably the easiest to adhere to every day sadly, Remember What Fear Taste Like.

I Will Have No Fear