Log 027 ~Will You Name Me~

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Again more work I should be doing with Lady Sophia, but someone said “Life Finds A Way,” or if I want my kid to keep living the life he has and what about my other books these days. “Will You Name Me”

Sunday, July 28, 2019

Log 027 ~Will You Name Me~

To Will:
I AM a Millionaire right now, and you should keep that same hustle if you want to be a billionaire. Big Dog, Big Nuts, as Lamar Davis would put it in GTA V. Last week we spoke a bit about some characters and yours. Lamar was a good one, and you’ve been lost some in Wolfenstein: Youngblood. *SIGH” Jessie and Sophie Blazkowicz along with Abby. How about getting back into DBH as well. I know you deserve a break after “Fangs For Coming” talk about becoming disillusioned. The blurb when over as expected, nonsense, nope to caring, and no characters. Hell, you barely found the title, might stick.

So that’s what today will be about, besides your list of failure, how’s that for success? You should be mowing the lawn but of course, yesterday was a bust, my fault. I make things so hard for you, I know. B III needs his meds, and you’ll get them. Of course, you’re also downloading oodles of porn like Sofi Ryan “Carpool Pickup.” Worst okay Megan Marx “Teeny Tiny Teen” Instagram. Before you forget Whitney Wright something or other and Carrie “Fuck Your Job” and “Model For Me.” As the song goes, “ It’s times like these, you learn to love again.” You’re not counting it as watching porn. (Didn’t even get hard) It’s work, research; adult entertainment is your purpose. So work on characters and yeah those Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 003 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” B III Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Naming My Novel And Writing A Back Cover Of It
    Completed
  4. I AM Reviewing The Five
    Failed
  5. I AM Writing For NaNoWriMo, A New Novel
    Completed
  6. I AM Finishing Reading Beauty in the Broken: A Diamond Magnate Novel by
    Charmaine Pauls Failed
  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” B III Deserves
  3. I AM Naming My Novel And Writing A Back Cover Of Another
  4. I AM Reviewing The Five
  5. I AM Bringing My Email Inbox To Zero
  6. I AM Finishing Reading Beauty in the Broken: A Diamond Magnate Novel by
    Charmaine Pauls

Wies Andres Barringer (The Beast)
Once he was a guardian of the works of the First Master with knowledge of The Tools Of The Gods. After his home is destroyed in an attempt to contain “The Air of Aeolus” a.k.a. Project Levitation he was kidnapped. Serving the Mistress Director as an Executioner. Married to Briseis and “Canvas” to Skelly Kemper.

Briseis Rosalie Barringer (The Machine)
Former slave girl, bought by the Mistress Director as a wife to The Beast. After her first night taken, she is found to have an immunity to the virus, which creates more beasts. Hating her life at first, she loves The Beast above all others.

Skelly Horatio Kemper (The Artist)
Keeper of The Fangs of Momus. A former brain surgeon turned Tattoo Artist; he sketches the faces of The Beast victims. With both blood and ink, he scars and decorates The Beast’s back. Because of The Beast and Fangs, it’s possible to clone, human beings

Desdemona Autumn Price (Mistress Director)
A Beast herself she hides this fact from those she commands. Scornful of most men her most loyal are either women or Eunuchs. She uses The Beast to punish any who may oppose. She seeks to keep her powers and The Tools of The Gods.

Cassandra Katelin Holloway (The Believer)
Servant of one of The Salamanders from “Apocalypse Rush.” A true believer in her Master, “The Dragon.” Willing to die in his name but cares for other human lives. She is the second immune found, in part to sleeping with Dragon. Hates the Mistress Director.

Tegan Cassie Barringer
Little sister to Briseis and slave belonging to Skelly. Due to his service for the Mistress Director and his true love for Briseis he now possesses Tegan. She knows no other desire but quickly becomes conflicted with Skelly’s actions. Naïve about the world and how Briseis survives.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 026 ~Worrying Winds Of Will~

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What’s the point of waking up to worry, to breathe so others can use such valuable air only to make you regret your last one and why not count my blessing of being near an AC? “Worrying Winds Of Will”

Saturday, July 27, 2019

Log 026 ~Worrying Winds Of Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Millionaire right now, and I still worry. I said a few times that the more you have, the scarier it gets. More money more problems like the song. You know I would give anything for such huge concerns. If you asked me what scares me the most these days, it would be my voice. I’ve never been one to blow hot air, to talk rather than breathe. To this day I can’t stand people that talk about A Quiet Place. You know, “why didn’t they build a home next to the waterfall?” People desperate for their voices, Lady Lu.

One day I need to write a review on that reasoning. Would it be any better than me talking at a Drive-Thru? How about talking on the phone? I swear if one more person refers to me as Ma’am? You know that’s one more reason I’m on Brainbuddy and I’m still screwing up. It says that overtime your voice becomes stronger, manlier, hell I’m back starting at day one. Positive vibes, I did do the exercises today and woke up on time. It doesn’t matter though because how do people see me, but that’s another good thing I usually don’t care. More to the point I’m worried about how people see our conversations, all of them My Lady. One more reason I’m not going for a paperback novel, other than being cheap or damn lazy?

Yeah, I worry about how much money fans in my hands. This morning I was nervous because I thought the AC had cut out. I’m a man that’s scared to call his Olds, and I shouldn’t have to because I’m an “adult?” Yesterday it was the fact that I almost killed B III because he was begging for BBQ and he looked like he might choke. Hell, I thought I might never get from under my sheets this morning. I’m always on high alert when I take Triple B for his walk. I can’t even carry “Lucille” to protect us because somebody ahem (white neighbors) might call the cops. The state of my country and I shiver more at the thought of my people like they say I’m not black enough. How about all those keyboard warriors than might read my cover blurb today ha?

WORRY goes on my list of triggers right STUPID, FEAR, but nobody cares for second or third right? Nobody but me, Worrying Winds Of Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 025 ~Out Of Ideas Will~

WillLeave a comment

From fiction to the real world, though I always like to think I’ll be a hell of a survivor in the coming war against the dead, chances are I’ll be a corpse in bed, flipping a coin of what will make me get up, oh wait? Out Of Ideas Will

Friday, July 19, 2019

Log 025 ~Out Of Ideas Will~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Millionaire right now but not if I keep buying naughty coins. Using my money to buy play money; oh the irony. It’s like a writer writing about an author. I get it, but to me, it sounds like cannibalism. My last two stories, one character owned a bookstore. The one I recently finished was somewhat of a firebrand preacher. Wouldn’t you know it I fulfilled that lady preacher’s prophecy that I would somehow be a Reverend? Now I’m not saying I heard the voice of God. Still, orgasms are a divine state of affairs.

Yesterday I told Dirty Diana that I couldn’t take a naked woman only on that fact. It’s why I know Tessa Taylor Bang Bus “Everglades Adventure.” Cassy “Classy Cassy” SBJ or Maggie Green, site: My Friend’s Hot Mom. Before you nail me for being inappropriate, I respect all of the actresses. I even remember Lauren Cohan from TWD as Maggie Greene/Rhee. If anything this makes me better than most Republicans. I acknowledge evidence of wrongdoing. The point is. However, I keep doing it, over and over, twice today. The oldest crimes in the newest ways but that’s Inspector Echo’s call. I wish I could tell you a new story a happier tale. No, if it’s not naked girls, it’s fear. I think that’s it Lady Sophia, sex or hell Fapping makes me fearless. In a world full of mind-numbing terror, but I’ll do it myself.

I worry about my next breakdown when it comes to porn, so I learn to write some. My novels have the main character yours truly, of course. Usually, whoever pissed me off at the moment; at least three stories have the “basic bitch.” There’s a brothel featuring every girl under the sun, Unforgivable sins and tons of blood and/or an orgy. I don’t want to be Taylor Swift, either finding people to make me feel bad. Disney rehashes the same ideas, but like them, I want world domination. Another storyboard trope. Most of all though I want to quit sitting here with a hundred emails to read. Waking up only went I’m horny, hungry or damn near helpless. I want to tell stories of B III having a happy life. Not just guarding me in my depression if that’s what this is, I don’t know.

Help myself right, Lady Sophia but Out Of Ideas Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 024 ~Will Come The Silence~

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I’m the strong silent type, well minus the strong I suppose, but I always get that I’m a great listener but whoever listens to me and there are so many things you can do in bed other than that thing. “Will Come The Silence” sometimes, but what’s next

Thursday, July 25, 2019

Log 024 ~Will Come The Silence~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Millionaire right now but shush. Now you know I’m one for moans, whimpers, and screams, yeah I’m no good with dialogue novel wise. Anyway, there is something to be known about the sound of silence. Now should I take the crass route and talk about women gagging. You know choosing a dick over-breathing. How about the use of sex toys though I buy women beautiful lingerie for a reason. There’s also the whole “stalker” angle sigh. Let me reiterate the fact that I’ve never done that, shocker right?

What I mean is I’ve never been one to watch a porno, naked women are everywhere. When I see a particular actress that I like, I have to find her video history. I’m hopeless sometimes in my way. Take, for example, Hayden Bell; she did Sweet Slurpee for Reality Kings. I know a few of her movies, but Street Blowjobs is my favorite. I like Whitley Wright from Prom Night and maybe one other film. My point is dominants study submissives. A one-night stand is one thing but to study a particular woman, to have a personal connection. Again I’m not talking hidden cameras or hiding that type of thing. It’s feeling something beyond language and hell what happens if I tell the truth? What about if I try to be nice? I hate playing Cyrano de Bergerac, not again.

I’ve said it often enough I love Saturday mornings lying in bed with a woman. You know I’ve got my 40’s and 50’s Nuclear Pop, the only time I listen anymore. How about reading a book in bed or on the loveseat? A trip to the library or the movies? You know I think that’s the ticket, intimacy you hear it in the silence. As the song goes, “but words sometimes get in the way.” It’s always spoiled things for me. I know that much is true. If I can’t talk, why should she right? Dirty Diana with my current body issues better I not talk at all. Still, there is the problem of communication, one more reason for a submissive. She learns to anticipate a dominant no words required. In a way that’s my novel but where does the time go these days wow.

Wanted to talk about The Beast and the Dead, and frozen vengeance but you know I Will Come The Silence.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 023 ~Counting On You Will~

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Hurt oh let me count the ways but shouldn’t I count my blessings, how I hate the church, but those habits die hard, and I sort of feel like I’m dying from my side to my overabundance of sleep. “Counting On You Will”

Wednesday, July 24, 2019

Log 023 ~Counting On You Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM A Millionaire right now so you would think I could buy a heart. Hell like The Legend of Zelda the truth is I’m living on some. Didn’t Stevie Wonder talk about living enough, yes I know the lyrics. Only I don’t need my “writing resource” penalizing me again. Speaking of which that is what I’m counting up, crimes, slings, and arrows, other pains. For example, I have to report to Brainbuddy again, like rehab, you know. I woke up after a long nap and of course what happens well happened.

So should I blame “Sweet Slurpee Hayden Bell” from Reality Kings? Perhaps one Pinterest board that now has 151 Sections. Yes, I still plan on owning a brothel one day. I wonder how many girls Dennis Hof had on his roster at any one time? Of course, the Milf isn’t helping. Besides those numbers, there’s the list of aliments I’m suffering through today. How many ribs are broken, not for real? I go for days not thinking about my perfect ears but then again? Mornings are getting weird besides being so tired, but of course, I don’t have a schedule. Case and point we’re talking, and I should be reading. I need to drink more water, There’s never enough hours in the day, and my email is going to explode. What about getting my book published again, for Kindle only?

I think the title is an adequate sentiment, “Gulp.” As far as other book titles, the one I finished, “Fangs For Coming” or how about “Faces Only Fangs Could Love?” The blurb still requires more writing than I’m willing to do right now. Anyway, this week haven’t I mention gratitude, being grateful, hell the ideas keep coming. I have more food than I know what to do with Inspector Echo. If anything, I need to eat more or change my diet. The fact that I can is quite a blessing. How about the fact that I can wear jeans at work all the time now? B III has plenty of time I keep saying to myself because I refuse to think otherwise. I protect him from the negative plus he doesn’t understand the news. I’ll say it, I love my country but hate the President. Now my day job and the people, that’s a question.

I’m sorry I hate Math Echo, Counting On You Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 022 ~Love Will Sound Like~

WillLeave a comment

The only PERSON’s opinion that should mean anything is my own and possibly the girl I marry, should I also include my furbaby anyway, a girl said something today and let’s say my earphones will be on. Love Will Sound Like

Tuesday, July 23, 2019

Log 022 ~Love Will Sound Like~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Millionaire right now, but I don’t need a hearing aid. Old as I am, as loud as the world is, I should be grateful. One of my many motivations today stressed the importance of showing gratitude. I’m thankful my ears are healthy, hell perfect. I didn’t have to listen to A&W; I did get through my Meditation. One more afternoon of people showing me who they are, to be honest. You know what I usually don’t hear, those three little words. I love you.

It’s not that they don’t exist; it’s just that people don’t make them matter. When there was only me and B III, I said them all the time and meant them. Do you know what he said in return? He growled when he knew I was upset and looked for something to fight. My “father” and nephew stopped by, and he barked at the gate, wanting them to go away. Let’s not talk about my dad, and I don’t know any of my nephews enough to form an opinion. Triple B cries when I’m hurt and lies on the affected area. No wonder I thought a bug flew in my ear, too much toxicity at work. Yeah, people talk too damn much. I hear the clack of his nails on the floor, or the pitter-patter, a bath, and a nail grind are needed. He huffs, and he puffs, letting me know to get off my behind and do something anything.
Talk about having a purpose.

Now you tell me you love me, and again I am grateful. I feel undeserving sometimes I know, it even scares me a bit. You want to know when I hear it baby girl. Those Saturdays we lie here for two or three hours and imagine we’re the only two people left in the world. Please don’t let our kids be jocks? A cappuccino when I’m working or hot chocolate when I finish, coffee umm eww. Those times you sing to me because every day I’m losing my voice. How we watch some movie, I’ve seen a dozen times, and you’re surprised or pepper me with questions. Those nights we rant together about what they did to poor Prince Henry or Queen Daenerys. I can pretend I don’t hear some STUPID girl in my ear because I’m coming home to you. Love Will Sound Like

“You’re a good man,
(Will.)
And it doesn’t matter what
anyone else thinks but me.” movie Death Race – 2008

I Will Have No Fear

Log 021 ~Give Orders You Would Follow~

WillLeave a comment

Camp NaNoWriMo, well general NaNoWriMo says 50,000 words, so I get it done, Brainbuddy suggest a podcast, and I listen to a bit, and of course, B III demands his morning stroll, when will someone follow me. Give Orders You Would Follow

Monday, July 22, 2019

Log 021 ~Give Orders You Would Follow~

Ninety-Fourth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Millionaire right now, and you can be too. Yeah, I sound like one of my many motivations, Eric Thomas, Tom Bilyeu, Ray Lewis, etc. A better way of saying today’s rule might be Practice What You Preach. Yesterday, for example, I told myself I was going to finish my story, and I did so. Because Camp NaNoWriMo says, you can write 50,000 words in 30 days I finished. Even this morning, while I was on Brainbuddy for once. I read about this podcast, Porn Free Radio #185 How Successful Guys Overcome Edging.

My point is Madam Justice is I want to be a leader. You can’t lead, though unless you know what it means to follow. In my experience, I have known too many corrupt leaders. I always speak about the men that I admire. In these past days, I can add many more women. Don’t look at me like that, I respect women despite my BDSM teachings and dirty talk. Hell in my novel, the head honcho was a woman, the Mistress Director, and she’s a female I despise. Sadly though the leaders I’m surrounded by either make me laugh or make my blood boil. There’s the General Manager at the Day Job, A&W, my “father,” more. I want to be the best leader I can be for those who would follow. I’m a traditionalist, and I believe that a man, a husband, a father must lead his family, you know.

Any true leader of men, a commander, a general, a king, must be willing to die for those he leads. You know I’m not afraid to die, I’m scared to look STUPID. Madam Justice that remains my trigger. The fear that those under my charge will know failure because of my direction. They will know dejection, destruction, and death, and I will not do that to anyone. Strangely enough, my leaders lead me to such things. Brainbuddy is one of the few things that drive me towards being a better person. Rather than hating myself. If you give orders that should be the goal, for betterment. Soldiers will die to protect their families, their country. A submissive and dominant are both set free with their power. My son is happy because he knows I defend him, rethink the leash dynamic.

“Higher, Faster, Further baby” didn’t I say I respect women; Give Orders You Would Follow.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 019 ~Additives Of The Will~

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Today, which is Sunday, I finished writing one more novel, I was in the zone with this 50,100, but the words weren’t the only thing I was addicted to; it could be worse, smoking or drinking perhaps? Additives Of The Will

Saturday, July 20, 2019

Log 019 ~Additives Of The Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Millionaire right now, and with money comes forgetfulness. I told A&W once that’s when you know you have cash when you’re not adding up every single penny. Hell Lady Lu I wasn’t counting up money but words, whorish characters, and so many weird obsessions.

It’s because of this I owe you an apology, but you know how I am. Sad that only a few moments ago, it’s Sunday now but yay Time Travel? Anyway, today I finished my book, and I was so eager I took Saturday for Sunday. Talk about being discombobulated, which I am right now. It’s always strange to finish one more book, and after the initial shock, I don’t know. 50, 100 words, and again once I got started, I was absorbed in work; this morning and then this evening. I don’t want to sound negative, Lady Lu, but I always am once the job is complete. Great joy and with great labor and of course I set up the “Mistress Director” in one of my other finished titles. Now, like Ving Rhames, the question becomes “What Now.” Yes, and before I forget, I am sorry for yesterday Lady Lu.

Anyway, yes, my story fucked me up (LANGUAGE). Strange that so many pretty girls didn’t make it through my novel. I don’t even remember if the Mistress Director died in another part, I will have to check. I read somewhere that when people see something cute, they become destructive. I could eat you up; I want to hug you hard, stuff like that. One more reason I’m a dominant and a sadist to boot. Not that such thoughts are wrong, understand, but I need to get back on Brainbuddy. Did I fall off the wagon; hell, I smashed it to bits this week. Street Blowjobs, Teen Starlet, Isaku, at this point I don’t need to write another novel. I haven’t been sleeping well, and when I do wake up, well sex wakes me up. You know 5-hour Energy screwed me over so many months ago.

Okay enough sex talk, I’m losing time over The Walking Dead trailer. If it’s not that after watching Marz play Detroit: Become Human, it’s been all gaming reactions. Guess I’m looking for someone else to be mad at, they play games; I write books. Anyway, I got through writing so next; Additives Of The Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 020 ~It’s Called Character Will~

WillLeave a comment

Sunday, July 21, 2019

Log 020 ~It’s Called Character Will~

To Will:
I AM a Millionaire right now, and you could finish by tomorrow. Exciting, weird, again, pick any word but impossible okay? Of course, we have to talk about those six impossible things. The question is, who do you want to be tomorrow? It’s like being in the car driving and getting that estimated arrival time, so speeding up.

What kind of daddy do you want to be in the morning? You get up, struggle to take B III for a walk, and then you ignore him the rest of the day. He sleeps, he guards, while you struggle to write while going through withdrawal. Yes, you give him his food, his meds. “On time” please, that’s 7:55 PM his second pill and not the midnight hour. Hell, last night was a bitch (LANGUAGE) he has to stop eating stuff off the ground. Little vacuum, hunter believing in Hakuna Matata. Only the characters he plays but what about you absentee father? What about when you have some two-legged rugrats, but you’ll get to that soon enough. Why not now though, like I said driving around and you want to beat the clock don’t you?

A lot more today considering how much more there is to write. No amount of time seems like enough to grow up. Yeah, I didn’t see your “father” coming through with your nephew. When’s the last time you called your sister? It gets annoying that everyone thinks your world should revolve around them. You remember some time ago we talked about saying more than Hey or Sup and what about Rule 002. You Are Not A Caveman. Still feels like something out of 10,000 BC. People want a spot in the circle you have yet to create. You have yet to decide the man you want to be Will. So you have masks, caves, you play the fool or worse they make you that way. Speaking of circles, you have plenty of zeros from working less on Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 003 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” B III Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Naming My Novel And Writing A Back Cover Of It
    Failed
  4. I AM Reviewing The Five
    Failed
  5. I AM Writing For NaNoWriMo, A New Novel
    Completed
  6. I AM Finishing Reading Beauty in the Broken: A Diamond Magnate Novel by
    Charmaine Pauls Failed
  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” B III Deserves
  3. I AM Naming My Novel And Writing A Back Cover Of It
  4. I AM Reviewing The Five
  5. I AM Writing For NaNoWriMo, A New Novel
  6. I AM Finishing Reading Beauty in the Broken: A Diamond Magnate Novel by
    Charmaine Pauls

It’s all about #5, and you could be done by tomorrow if you keep working. One more excuse down the drain and a bunch of characters that will never know real life. Monsters, Madmen, and Masturbation fodder from Angie Varona to Jordyn Jones. What about that Audrey, no not from Little Shop? There’s a real-world Will but know this okay friend, It’s Called Character Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 018 ~Where Will It End~

WillLeave a comment

One month and some change left before I’m writing the sorriest excuse to a beautiful woman, not to mention all those in my novel but I would have to get published first and the story I’m writing now? “Where Will It End.”

Friday, July 19, 2019

Log 018 ~Where Will It End~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Millionaire right now but still not published. I’m getting closer to finishing one more story that remains nameless today, but I need to feel; accomplished. There is not much of that for me these days. I quit writing to be called Ma’am at Taco Bell. One more reason to choose the Starving Artist path.

What am I a sim? Well, I want to be a customer, but time is not on my side when it comes to Alice Little. Didn’t I say I hate letting pretty girls down? When I started talking to her, I figured, get published become a success. Lady Sophia I’ve wasted a month and a half, hell a year. Alice is texting now, and she won’t buy some story of sorry I trashed your time. I always feel like I need an excuse for being in the way. Women though, I tell myself there is some woman out there waiting. A wonder I go young, not go to jail young but again TTB. If anything, I need to be writing a scene for Nevada. Only this isn’t my novel, and we’ll get to that. I’m sure I still have my Purge “Party” Fantasy somewhere but haven’t been looking for it.

How about my life story or my son’s who’s lying right here next to me sleeping. I read something horrible that I won’t dare repeat, but I want B III to have everything. A yard I’m not scared for him to play in for hours. I’m always worried about his health. He needs a mom and siblings and being fourteen, bless his patient heart. What about me though, the answer still is, I didn’t think I would make it this far. I’ve seen a new version of The Lion King. There are now ten seasons of The Walking Dead. Hell, I am blessed with so much and dare to dream of more. I should be working harder; I did around 2100 words today before I went for food. I’ll make the deadline for Camp NaNoWriMo for sure but let’s talk about sex baby the song says.

Is that what I’m calling my novel. As for now, the group is wading through blood and “other” body fluids. The Beast is losing his tattoos with help from his wife and yes I’m planning an orgy so ask again Where Will It End.

I Will Have No Fear