Tag: Log

Log 215 ~The Will Is Silence~

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Every little bit of silence, I feel hope, funny I didn’t mention how my phone has scared me with every single sound and was that only last week, and now I need more noises to terrify me 24/7? The Will Is Silence, I hope.

Saturday, February 01, 2020

Log 215 ~The Will Is Silence~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and I know why people pay so much for silence. It’s always my fault, you know, everything. Now Lady Lu, that’s some noise. The voice inside my head. And not the hum that’s coming through loud and clear now that I’ve cut the fan off. You know how often I talk about gratitude, the one point all my motivations agree on; it never fails. I should have been grateful for the ants last year because even that beats the constant humming. Had I kept my work ethic to see Alice Little, I would have more than enough money to not worry about the problem I’m facing.

A horse, how about my kingdom for a ladder? While I’m speaking on standing tall, I should work on growing a spine. Well, I did get a haircut, but I hesitated at the post office. I wouldn’t honk at the person at the drive-thru, and instead, I was going around. My biggest sin of all? I didn’t call back the electrician on this humming, and why? I’m afraid Lady Lu, of being in the way. The sun keeps rising, the world keeps spinning, and I don’t want to bother anyone. Today I bought a stethoscope trying to hear through the walls. Tomorrow I might buy a ladder so I can get to the roof myself. I’m not suicidal, but I would indeed kill myself before asking for help. Even dying, somebody would have to go around me, and so like I said yesterday, I’m Alive.

How about my poor dæmon, he must be going crazy with the noise, but he stays cuddling me wanting to help. He’s getting too old for all the foolishness though he still barks from time to time. My ear still hurts, and I ran over my big toe with the garbage can trying to make it to the roof. I could have fried myself with all of those switches trying to kill the noise. My greatest wish is for silence, especially now, one more day where I’m not reading. I’m still looking towards my future, so will the next two days come around, and I will be laughing about this problem? What about next Saturday, if I’m not crazy by then or my kid goes all Children of the Corn.

Somehow, One Day, only a second The Will Is Silence.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 214 ~Willie That’s A Series~

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Last week I thought it was the neighbor’s wall, then their satellite dish, something they have making that awful racket, now it could be my wall, the plumbing, or the plug outlet, so much reading on humming. Willie That’s A Series

Friday, January 31, 2020

Log 214 ~Willie That’s A Series~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but not much of a reader. If I were, I would tell you I finally read my latest novel. I might not be worried about what happened here today though My Dæmon is none the worse for wear. At this time I should be playing Far Cry 5 and telling you a story about a fish. When I woke up early today, I wanted to speak on ending that damn humming. Why can’t I tell you there are no more pains or scars? How about I wasn’t “late” to the Day Job? I defeated that infernal humming; no, only I’m alive.

Sometimes, that’s all you can say; I’m alive. The story of my life has yet to reach its end. Count your blessings, my motivations say, and again breathing is one. I had a good lunch today. For once, the kitchen isn’t a bloody mess because I woke up early to clean it. Excuse the language, I don’t think I’ve ever heard Cherry use the term “bloody,” but it sounds English. I’ve also had Game Of Thrones on Youtube. Pretty unwise, I did catch up on my sleep this afternoon. My Day Job wasn’t bad, though again, I got that question of what you’re doing here. I’ll give them credit for having the courage to ask me because I won’t ask myself. I’m listening to another playlist. I don’t have the money for Audible, but I still have Dennis Hof’s book.

His story ended years ago, but there is no shortage of tales in this world. One more reason I’m hesitant to finish Naughty Little Christmas somehow. From what I’ve read, this leads into a sequel and possibly another series. I’m more of a book traveler than a time-traveler, or I would like to believe. I want to learn something new every day, and isn’t that my rules, my writing reasons, things I’m grateful for, Lady Sophia? Indiana Gone is out there, starting a new chapter with her hubby. My other friends are moving forward, the best way they know-how. If anything, I’m stuck on the same page and that even opening my eyes is a victory. Let’s not start on my novels that are a series, and I have no idea how that happened, but the fact is I’m Alive.

How many copies of myself and Willie That’s A Series?

I Will Have No Fear

Log 213 ~Will Pulls An All-Nighter~

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In one ear, out the other, too bad, I’m usually thinking about filling other holes, and if only the one in my bank account were full, I would be all set and wasn’t I trying to hire a maid once but now some company’s coming. Will Pulls An All-Nighter.

Thursday, January 30, 2020

Log 213 ~Will Pulls An All-Nighter~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so it’s been a while since I’ve slept alone? If I had a million dollars, what would be the first thing? Two girls at the same time? Life goal to wake up with a naked lady every day. Talk about facts for today. Well, I’m trying not to; I’m sick, scared, so slightly aggravated, etc.

What ticks me off more than having a chance at tits and fucking it up somehow. How about my “father” coming for a visit and leaving my dæmon all alone with him? Yeah, you can see where a naked lady would come in handy for somethings, Diana. More than sex?

My motivations always discuss not living in the past but those that don’t learn from it SIGH. There was the time that lady needed money, but what would she do to get it, hmm? I gave her five bucks for nothing, and let’s not talk about my views on charity. Only is my cowardice any better? These past few days, it’s been rough. I haven’t had to worry about convincing pretty girls to do anything. The porn is helping for moments at a time, of course. Finally, I’m still pretty mad about last night. Dirty Diana, I couldn’t figure out to help Cherry, so why bother asking her anything else. Now tell me when’s the last time the tech support guy fucked. Now the nerd always gets in some girl’s panties. Chances are it wouldn’t have happened regardless. It’s like Leonard wanting to give away his stuff because of Penny.

All night I worked on poetry. When it wasn’t that, I was trying to fix the computer, and still, I’m wary of the piss-poor job I’ve done. The things I do for women and I can only wish that it ended there. Tonight I should be cleaning the house. Why, you ask? The bug man is coming around and again, my father. I’ll be up listening to that humming too. As the song goes, when you worry, you make it double. Yes, I’m fearful, and I don’t even want to talk about it. Only it’s more like desperation these days. I also thought about taping aluminum foil to the window. Well, since you’re expecting some sex? A fantasy of mine is tying a woman up in ribbons from medals and beauty queen sashes. Not my night, Will Pulls An All-Nighter.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 212 ~Will Of Computer Illiterates~

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Last week I talked about sweat and blood, and I’m “man enough,” to admit there were tears of frustration and considering it’s taken me two whole days to get this conversation done. Will Of Computer Illiterates yeah I want to sleep more

Wednesday, January 29, 2020

Log 212 ~Will Of Computer Illiterates~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I can pay people to do things. It would be nice to have my own “FOS” (Friends Of Spinelli) or “FOW.” Yes, once upon a time, I watched General Hospital, the women are beautiful. I’m also a big fan of Studio Fow, and you can look that up at your peril Inspector Echo. Only I’m not ashamed of once liking Soap Operas or my obsession with Adult Entertainment. My fixation, passion, I’ll even say mania, I’m surprised I found time to talk to you.

No, that’s not an insult; I give my energy, time, money, and even my books when it comes to a pretty face. Is that what inspired me to watch the Royal Rumble, yes, a catfight might do it for me sometimes. Could it be the reason my computer is slowing down? I should probably run System Restore, but not until I solve the current issue. Today I wanted to talk about the perils of adulting. It could be my bum ear, my hands that feel like I might have pulled something. Well, that will be my leg at the Day Job, no doubt. What about the constant humming? Didn’t I say once I was learning to live with the drone? I’ll admit I was wrong when it came to that. My biggest problem today is I’m trying to be “The Man” and still acting like a little boy. Yesterday (Sunday), everybody was mourning a GREAT man in Kobe Bryant, SIGH.

Again I’m not mocking, but not crying either, and several people died, it’s sad, but I’m not reading about that anymore. What I am studying is Cherry’s poetry, again and again. A man doesn’t want to fail a woman. So since 1:00 PM this afternoon, I’ve been working on a project for her and failing miserably. Remember when I was playing Far Cry 5, another Clutch Nixon mission “The Lord of The Wings?” Inspector Echo, this is so much worse. I’ve talked women out of their clothes, but I can’t break a page? I don’t have the time to look up the differences between a geek and a nerd. However, unlike so many bullies thinking, wearing a pair of glasses doesn’t make you either. I’m a horny guy thinking if I can’t do this small thing well, I’m not much.

Sorry, Will Of Computer Illiterates

I Will Have No Fear

Log 211 ~Will Leaves A Note~

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When I was in junior college for a bit, I wrote to some girl; let’s say that it’s a lesson I keep having to repeat, which is why I swore off poetry for quite some time and now, well, my second best friend can judge. Will Leaves A Note.

Tuesday, January 28, 2020

Log 211 ~Will Leaves A Note~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and I want to take you with me, My Love. Now I don’t have to spell out who I admire, but in my business well, it didn’t help him any. He got married twice and never tried it again, but I have you. Yes, I have you, and there will never be any secrets between us. “THEY,” say that brevity is the soul of wit. That was William Shakespeare if memory serves. Anyway, I tend to be longwinded in writing, at least. The things I say can often be, well, there are many things, so why not “Come with Me Now.”

I can’t even tell you now what today’s plan is because I want to be a gentleman. If you didn’t like me using songs, chances are we wouldn’t be here today. Only an epiphany I had, always apologizing for something that isn’t a flaw. The same is true for my writing baby girl. Do you remember the show “How I Met Your Mother?” I hated Ted and especially hated Robin. Well, Ted had this thing about women reaching for the check SIGH. As always I am one for tradition, I pay you shouldn’t even be worried about it ever. My thing has always been words; I realize the power that they have. The words I’ve written for myself have nearly had me fired, I’ve met cops, was kicked out of school for a while. Those same words with a handsome face, a pretty girl, a beautiful woman, or a wad of cash, well, we’re here.

You weren’t scared when I quoted the lyrics of Butterfly, a bit of Twilight, my many novels, or even the truth. Still, I pick up a pen, I touch a keyboard, I might text, and it frightens me baby doll. Besides being in love with you more each day and hating being away, I rather have you around whenever I can. Obsession, see you don’t even bat an eye with such talk. My dream told me so, yes, you know I believe in dreams. Last night it was so easy, the two of us lying on this couch/bed duo you in a hoodie and well? Talk for another time, but we were getting ready to watch WWE Royal Rumble. I don’t want to be afraid, though, when I write to you ever. Stay With Me before Will Writes A Note.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 210 ~Texting Speed Equals Want Need~

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I’m still plenty for tradition when it comes to books and writing, but I do use my laptop, along with everything else, and you know I was never one for conversations over the phone on in-person, *shudders*. “Texting Speed Equals Want Need”

Monday, January 27, 2020

Log 210 ~Texting Speed Equals Want Need~

Hundred And Twenty-First Rule

Madam Justice,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and that’s because as the song goes, I “Say” what I need to say. Now I can run an empire by my phone one way; only I still need to speak. If anything, though, I still prefer text be it the Day Job, my Olds, or “dozens” of other people I prefer not to talk to ever.

To quote another song, “What About Your Friends?” Since I am in a foul mood, forgive my impression of “Scar” my friends. The humming is beginning to get to me, that’s been going on for days on end. I wonder, can you text a handyman? You can, I’m sure of, but I’ve already cut off most of the house trying to find the source. So back to my friends who I’ve texted every day for at least a week now. Indiana Gone called me the nice guy, which I don’t mind coming from her being honest. It’s my other friends I haven’t seen undressed though.

One more reason my phone is my enemy at the moment. Now, like most people, I have come to rely on it far too often. You know that old song, Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes, it’s become, phone, wallet, keys. Let me go all Austin Powers, spectacles, testicles, wallet, and watch. I’m more Kid, Phone, Spectacles, Wallet, Keys. Even with all of this, there’s still the constant fear of hacking. I swear I checked my phone and had a few open pages, and now I’m wondering did I close them. With all the humming, you have to forgive the music; Somebody’s Watching Me. Okay, back to texting, I’m always saying something so STUPID. Of course, you know what’s been my motive for the past couple of weeks; I’m giving money away. Not on Patreon or Onlyfans, needing the personal touch.

You know writing Cherry another poem for starters. I also have to get back to M Anime, but I’m busy talking to you. Indiana Gone is my best friend, and I only need to keep her so. If I were to put the three of them in a list? No, I’m not that crass. Yeah, this coming from a guy whose poetic aspirations include Breasts, Tongue. Thighs, and Behind. No woman would tolerate such poetry.

I need friends, but I want more as always, Justice, Texting Speed Equals Want Need.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 209 ~Will Of The Humdrum~

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Someone once said that life should be a wonderful adventure, but when was my last one, October of last year, and now when I stay awake for anything, it’s because I’m afraid until that fear dulls to worry. Will Of The Humdrum.

Sunday, January 26, 2020

Log 209 ~Will Of The Humdrum~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and you can’t imagine money being boring. A heartbeat, this humming in the house, but never all the money in the world. Yes, I know you can think higher than a billion, but there is always a cause for order and such. Now speaking of money, Andrew Yang’s plan would be useful right now. As far as your future finances, now what did I say about having order, well I don’t want to talk about it now. Well, I do, but all this FEAR that surrounds me.

Who knows, the law of attraction being what it is, you’ll be fine. I gave up the positive thinking on the 21st in case you don’t want to look back. Of course, you have to keep going. Again I’m speaking as a time-traveler today is Friday, but I’m staying ahead. I don’t want to talk about what’s wrong in your life right now. Only what you have to look forward to, my friend. See, I can’t even keep that promise because your “father” is visiting, and another $375.00 is saying goodbye. Now, if anything, you should show gratitude for Rule 15, which states, “I Take My Own Lumps.” It means taking responsibility, and a man pays his debts. What about the fact that I have been “indeed,” productive today? I don’t get Grammarly’s problem with the word rather. How about your problem? Six Impossible Things:

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 024 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
    Failed
  3. I AM Publishing My Poetry “GULP”
    Failed
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
    Failed
  5. I AM Getting My Second Car Fixed
    Failed
  6. I AM Finishing A Naughty Little Christmas by Lili Valente
    Failed

Two of these Impossible things I could beat before “Sunday” and if nothing gets in the way? I find time to play Far Cry 5 and write poetry for Cherry, so why not these things. Do you remember it was a pretty little redhead Alice Little you were striving for, hmm? A trip down Nevada way, and you could use the excitement. Rockford was scary, but you were alive, you were alone but living. Like something out of Divergent, FEAR doesn’t shut you down; it wakes you up. It’s your worries that make you unconscious. You are a strange human being, but you know that already. You need to be focusing on the things you don’t know. If you don’t know, now you know to quote The Notorious B.I.G. How about I stop quoting the same Humdrum Six Impossible Things.

  1. I AM Keeping It In My Pants (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I AM Always The “Father” My Dæmon Deserves
  3. I AM Publishing My Poetry “GULP”
  4. I AM Reviewing Raphael By Tillie Cole
  5. I AM Getting My Second Car Fixed
  6. I AM Finishing A Naughty Little Christmas by Lili Valente

I’ll tell you what, I’ll get some reading done today and you on Sunday agreed? Positives about Fears, they’re not dull Will Of The Humdrum.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 208 ~Run, Hide, Something Will~

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We should run, we should hide, we should kick their butts, but no, I believe I’ll lie here a little while longer until my dæmon gets hungry if only he knew the man that his dad is in life. Run, Hide, Something Will?

Saturday, January 25, 2020

Log 208 ~Run, Hide, Something Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and that answers a lot of questions. One of my motivations says to ask yourself this question. What do you want to be proud of tomorrow? Today I’m asking myself, am I ever going to leave this bed? Yesterday I told myself I’m not running from my problems because there’s nowhere to run to now. I’m not hiding, but my ear is screwy yet again because I didn’t clean it, Lady Lu. What do you call anyone with lots of cash, who won’t consider the truth? And is by all accounts a criminal and a coward?

I don’t want to be a Republican. With all the stuff I’ve been finding, I better be above all else. Plus, I don’t hide from the truth Lady Luna like Budd and Bill, I know I deserve what I get and the day is still young. No spam phone calls, no suspicious logins, no scary emails from security. Yeah, they’re probably waiting for the Day Job when I have to sit there and stew. It beats lying here in sweat and smut. One more thing that makes me a Republican, having close ties with Russian girls. Oh, and instead of China, I’ve been getting back into Japan, and you know which part. I had a “friend” who would be quite annoyed; I can’t tell the difference between China and Japan. Now, country-wise sure. Only I’ve been racking my brain wanting to figure out where the granddad was from in the movie 3 Ninjas, that’s sad.

Either I’m too lazy to look it up or is it depression. Should I be saddened that I was so out of it yesterday (Wednesday) that I missed NXT? My motivations would say I should show gratitude for the progress I made in Far Cry 5. Now Republicans don’t show appreciation. They only take and then complain someone is trying to take their lives. I’m fully aware of all these things that I have done. Even more so, I’m letting everyone take my life while refusing to live it at all. If it’s not that, then I’m upset about the Day Job having me work so much. What could I have done today Lady Lu? I won’t fool myself into thinking I’m going to read anything, I will only survive.

Run, Hide, Kick Their Butts Blah Run, Hide, Something Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Log 207 ~Run Boy Run, Will~

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If you’re looking back, you’re not focusing on what’s in front of you, that would be a vibrating wall, violent memories of a father, very creepy messages from my internet security, no wonder I sleep but still I know. Run Boy Run, Will?

Friday, January 24, 2020

Log 207 ~Run Boy Run, Will~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now, as $375.00 is nothing. Well, that’s what I keep telling myself. The humming is nothing, the horniness, the hours spent doing, well, you guessed it, Lady Sophia. If I don’t mention it enough, I’m a time-traveler. Today is Wednesday, and I don’t even remember what I’m going to post today. There’s the adrenaline that comes from FEAR of my father. What about the aching that has gone away if you know what I’m saying, right? There is also the attitude that I thought I left behind in 2019, not so much.

So what is today’s story? I couldn’t possibly be talking about Naughty Little Christmas by Lili Valente. I haven’t gone near that book in weeks, so why do I pick up my iPad? The FEAR from yesterday hasn’t gone away. If anything, I should change my name to Sinestro. I’m fighting FEAR with Fear; Norton is scaring me to death, and so I focus on the humming in the walls. I’m almost used; I’ve nearly grown to; it’s becoming normal. Yeah, Grammarly is going to have a field day with that sentence. I only wanted to show that I can’t even be me anymore without a bunch of rules. I have to stay positive with everything Indiana Gone is going through. It’s wrong to talk to Cherry any particular way. M Anime is dealing with everything. A blessing somewhat I don’t speak to Okay anymore.

I’m losing myself to their stories. Now add the fact that somebody is out there trying to steal my story, my life. How I’m “running” around, but why do I spend all my time in bed. Lady Sophia, there is no place I want to be, and so you say that’s the exact point of books. As I tell M Anime all the time, it’s a vicious circle. I exist to keep existing. My motivations would say the reason for life is to be happy. What about How to Stop Worrying and Start Living by Dale Carnegie? He says to imagine the worst-case scenario, accept it, and move on from there. I lose everything my money, my models/mistresses/many “girlfriends,” my mom, and my mutt. No offense to my son, but I’m one for alliteration as always. Anyway, I’d forfeit the life I’m sitting here complaining about this very moment Sophia.

Gulp, Run Boy Run, Will.

I Will Have No FEAR

Log 205 ~Willie Don’t You, Oh~

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Well, those aren’t tears, and I still believe I need more sweat and blood, and I’m trying, and no, I’m not whining or crying, but today has been exhausting but I’m starting back at square one and it ain’t fun. “Willie Don’t You, Oh,” wow, am I right?

Wednesday, January 22, 2020

Log 205 ~Willie Don’t You, Oh~

Forgive Me Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, but how much would I give to have twenty-four days again? It hasn’t even been twenty-four hours yet, and you know these will be the HARDEST, yes pun intended. So apologies for what I did. For having to fight so hard today and for this week, and my usual humor. As always, my “code” is “just the facts, ma’am,” so (Sunday) night; I blew it as it were. So now that’s somethings crying, I see no need to so, the positives.

I found out I still have what it takes to write. Well, that comes from the same “obsession” that slew me last night. We do what we love Inspector Echo or we should. Is that why I BLANKED myself, as the song goes, isn’t it ironic. It’s reinvigorating in some ways. You know I was beginning to believe that it’s starvation that makes you want anything. My motivations always speak on being hungry because it drives you, fair enough. It’s like though having a bottle of water, makes me want the ocean. How much have I looked up, and I’m still not looking at twenty-four hours yet? I’m not one for philosophy, but I am thinking, not overthinking but flowing like water. You know there’s a better way to say that, but it’s like fishing.

My mind is clear, which, of course, is always a direct result. It doesn’t last for too long, but nobody gets how I find my peace. I’ve said before, I breathe naturally, I’m happier, the hunger drives me, but I’m not a beast. Not this moment anyway. Especially with both Cherry and M Anime going through hard times. There are tears, and the last thing I need to be doing is whining. Don’t get me wrong; I still want what I want, but now isn’t about me, Inspector Echo. You can’t give with an empty cup and if a “certain” chalice is full? Philosophy and now politics, the rich only want more always. It all comes back to BALANCE, and that is something I need to master. Now that’s another sin, either I starve, or I feast, I’m lazy, or I grind, always an extreme.

So I do regret what happened last night, the day I worked today, and then I got lazy, no reading. Only I’m not going to weep; Willie Don’t You, Oh.

I Will Have No Fear