Episode 220 ~Gutless, Guiltless, Girl-Less, Will~

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Rule Fifteen, “I Take My Own Lumps,” if I do something wrong, I take responsibility, according to my motivations you must with every area life, even when other people are stupid, but like Spectrum it still sucks. “Gutless, Guiltless, Girl-Less, Will”

Wednesday, February 6, 2019

Episode 220 ~Gutless, Guiltless, Girl-Less, Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
How To Make One Million Dollars, you know that I could “SUE” somebody… one of my coworkers, though to be fair he did mean well, I could sue the day job in general, and how about the “catalyst” for my writing; today isn’t so much my sins, so we call these things…

Ignorance, that’s why they don’t let me answer the door at the day job anymore, too afraid I’ll Let the Right One In, excuse me, I am a Real American, Let Me In, plus I’ve always had a thing for Chloë Grace Moretz, along with European witches, and Ellie from TLOU. And speaking of people that wouldn’t, shouldn’t, and that I couldn’t drag through my door because I’m innocent, I open my door to every Tom, Dick, And Harry, and I talk too damn much because nobody asks me anything honestly about myself unless they want to use me. Man, Monster, no I’m a moron, but I’ve seen what stupid people can do, they can become President, penis meet pornstar, they can be “freaking” Phenomenal.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-bM6FftupY

I, however, am guiltless, now I’m not a saint, but I am selective of my sins, and as I said, today I didn’t do anything wrong or more like yesterday when I got called into the back and accused of missing six days of work, an excuse to get rid of me, and I ask you why Inspector. Am I that much of a danger to anyone… I mentioned the “catalyst,” and things I wasn’t guilty of but called anyway and the lesson, not all things are meant to know writing or reading and sometimes people will only offer you silence. My son B III was right, wanting to scare away anyone at the door because if he had succeeded, I wouldn’t be so paranoid but why is it so wrong to want to better my situation, have I ever mentioned how much Spectrum sucks.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rtYU0x_PEgA

Instead of, well you see I’m the nice guy, most girls never see the dominant, and while hating myself would count as a sin, I absolutely love that guy, commanding, controlling, capturing, like Shusaku, Isaku, the corporation in “StudioFow” movies, customers in Vault Girls; what if the government is correct, porno along with colluding isn’t a crime. Add that to the long list as to why I don’t break hearts, maybe I take things like this too seriously giving a part of yourself to someone and thinking they keep it and not throw it away. Most if not all of these things aren’t crimes though and yet the need to apologize only continues to grow, but not to my job or anyone here but to that innocent bystander in the mirror, Gutless, Guiltless, Girl-Less, Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 219 ~Will Walk With Me~

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“Run boy run” as the song goes and the sitting down only gives me more time to think about the job I’m running away from or getting kicked out of, what about exercise and then again Office Space much? “Will Walk With Me”

Tuesday, February 5, 2019

Episode 219 ~Will Walk With Me~

Dear Future Wife,
How To Make One Million Dollars, talk in a funny voice, maybe like the first time I asked you out, that moment at your door, how about getting a word in edgewise when we took B III for a walk. As always I am a traditionalist so was it standing there waiting for you or watching you walk down that aisle, the running to be by your side when I honestly “poured the Bisquick” and ta-da more kids, and then there are days like these my love.

You know how I guard my words but truthfully, walking up to you… it was like a graveyard at night, the first charge of a battle, taking Dante’s place in the Inferno but what did I expect wanting to reach an angel. It was wanting your company more than the air that I breathe and yet feeling like I’ve run a marathon, every breath, knock knees, heartbeats cascading with every footstep. “THEY,” say dogs know people but my little boy, “He Don’t Love You Like I Love You,” but with all his barking and pulling, hell that was an easy walk, and I took your hand in mine… where are we going, we didn’t ask.

All I know is that I wanted you beside me and again, I’m for tradition but not a church guy and yet there I was to know Heaven’s Light, and I asked myself what took me so long, time to make turtle soup, give up childish things. Only I’m not feeling my age; I want to teach the kids about Star Wars, rush back and forth watching The Walking Dead, even stand in line for movies the likes of Trolls. Today though all I want to ever know in this life is I’m Coming Home To You to rant, rave, respite, and relief lie imminent, to find rest, a moment where I never need travel.

It’s amazing how many steps I’ve taken for people that don’t give a shit about me (yeah I don’t like swearing, intelligent but a bit pedestrian) so the question is why did it take me so long to move towards, well something, someone that I love? Sometimes I’m not the man I want to be, sometimes I think I’m not the man you need, and when I was a boy it was walking no running, we can just lay here, only my love can you ask, Will Walk With Me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZLfrRhvQEYU

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 218 ~Anxiety’s A Bitch, Not Her~

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Dear Anxiety, she’s either the girl I am continually paying for, or she’s my “Daddy,” so it’s a good thing I’m finally sitting down to write this although it’s late, yeah anxiety never let me out to play. Anxiety’s A Bitch Not Her

Monday, February 4, 2019

Episode 218 ~Anxiety’s A Bitch, Not Her~

Seventieth Rule Madam Justice

How To Make One Million Dollars, Cosplay, though I’m not so sure it works the same way for males in that area and though I might sound redundant, while I have a million problems with my face, I’m somewhat cool with my body but not “gay for pay.” Yeah, I’m nobody’s bitch, and I would call myself out for my language but the title; anyway let me state for the record there are plenty of women I “dislike” but for the most part with them, a more proper president said:

“the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”

Now I know, as always, this is more a conversation for Dirty Diana, I will call a girl plenty of things in a moment of passion, talk to the MILF or @courtscandyshop, but that’s more Dominant me than whoever I am at any given point. My “father” often talks about us being alike and haven’t I told you before he might hide his anxiety with pure anger but as for myself “THEY” say I wear my heart on my sleeve. These days it seems I like my anxiety, afternoon naps, and “ACHING” more than I like any girl and then I’m upset, but if there is any “bitch” I’m upset with, well, there’s a mirror.

You can’t call a girl a golddigger if you flash your cash, can’t blame her for getting scared when you give the Hunchback a run for his money, and when your fingers speak more truths than your mouth well, that’s how we roll. I need to break-up with my anxiety, and as far as dumping someone, now that’s a talk to have with Inspector Echo, maybe I should be like Sheldon and have a council of ladies at some point right? Perhaps Anxiety is like the best friend, and while I may have fantasies of two girls at the same damn time, she shouldn’t be one of them of course.

Another way of looking at it is that I’m being stalked by it and you know me, I don’t want to hurt anyone surprisingly enough, so I attempt to stay far away, and I keep myself from having any real true blue life. As my motivations go, take responsibility for my life, there are three girls I’m thinking of tonight, but I am far from a player, must mean I need to fire the fourth ugly chick from my stable… Anxiety’s A Bitch Not Her.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 217 ~Will Hunts Big Game~

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Does fishing count as hunting and how about when you feel like more the prey than the one hunter, and with these “fangs” of mine I would never be caught smiling though there is so much that I want. “Will Hunts Big Game.”

Sunday, February 3, 2019

Episode 217 ~Will Hunts Big Game~

To Will:
How To Make A Million Dollars, get yourself one of those helmets like Daft Punk and become an artist of merit and then maybe just maybe, you might Get Lucky, or so you think right? Suppose you’re creepy enough that you should let your quarry see you and while you hate the concept of hunting, you can at least make it fair, you’re not a liar are you; well other than to yourself, but it also explains why you have told yourself that story of D’Leh and Evolet.

Shhh, be very, very quiet, yeah right Super Bowl Sunday and all, but if you’re not looking forward to that, what is it you’re searching for; the Beast had it easy, Belle came to him. Cyrano had all the time in the world to get used to his nose, and Bobby Brown/Michael in Two Can Play That Game, well, you know. Anyway answer the question what do you want Will, a clock big enough to encompass the time needed for B III to live, to see you make something of your life; Level 14 on the 13th remember that. Virtues made bigger and vices smaller, now that is all kinds of dirty but speaking of the muck and the mire what about this list getting even greater, Six Impossible Things:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6kUCHX3wTMk
  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 035 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 003 No Fap)
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
    Failed
  3. I Will Review Sell My Soul (Sixty Days #1) by Jade West
    Failed
  4. I Will Review Depredation By Natalie Bennett
    Failed
  5. I Will Read “Lolita” Vladimir Nabokov
    Failed
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel
    Failed

A big fat zero, has it been so long… hell maybe you should find the day to shoot down, rub out and clean this list but yes this is my fault even with all the time in the world to “TRY” and do something. Now you don’t even remember how long this particular list has known to repeat, other than five and that was about two weeks ago, again there is so much to read and learn. Nice if you did that in a dentist office too don’t you think; no you’re wanting to keep C-Notes because you know what you’re looking for next isn’t that right, but shouldn’t you focus on Six Impossible Things:

  1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
  3. I Will Review Sell My Soul (Sixty Days #1) by Jade West
  4. I Will Review Depredation By Natalie Bennett
  5. I Will Read “Lolita” Vladimir Nabokov
  6. I Will Edit One Chapter Of My Newly Written Novel

Always or at least according to your motivations you should be a better man than you were yesterday and honestly when you’re hiding so much, the mirror is bothering you more and more, how do hunters take pictures of their kills, yeah you’re killing yourself, Will, figuratively speaking. Hello, honestly, you practice saying that in the mirror constantly to hide, you sing it to “Triple B” and isn’t he in the same predicament mouth-wise, and of course, you want to text it to the other MILF but that takes heart, and such matters, seriously Will sigh Will Hunts Big Game.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 216 ~Its Ads Up, Will~

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The price of growing up free, you can take that in so many different ways, but I believe somebody said too damn high, and that makes my pillow the softest, safest, and most sellable thing ever. Its Ads Up Will.

Saturday, February 2, 2019

Episode 216 ~Its Ads Up, Will~

Hey Lady Lu,
How To Make One Million Dollars, perhaps being a pillow spokesmodel, the poster boy for energy shots, a pretty good example of why we need contraceptives in the universe may be. A plum lesson on how pretty girls control guys or maybe not, on the one hand, I sang to a girl on the other the MILF in her sexy lingerie hasn’t talked me out of any more money but vacations in San Diego, I mean seriously?

Speaking of possibly warmer climates, doesn’t that make me more human, that I have to talk myself into saving me, I think I need a Super Bowl ad and even those have been getting worse by the year and you know I’m not a sports fan. If you went by my Spotify you might think, I’m the most motivated man in existence; I don’t remember the last thing I listened to other than speeches, oh yeah singing to “Indiana Gone” and even that was depressing. B III might like to write a letter to whoever makes my clothes, not sure if it’s cotton but he keeps finding ways to lie on me, hell by his standards I’m probably second only to the sun I think.

If you look at my Amazon, it’s quite clear that I’m a shut-in or at least a closed off person judging by my gaming collection and books; I’m a story oriented type of individual to be sure from Detroit: Become Human to Far Cry 5 and I’m still not reading Lolita as I should be. So when we look at my search history, and you would think I’m either highly educated, someone that needs to be locked up behind bars or in a white padded cell. Again look at all my searches in the book Lolita for stuff I don’t understand in French and then finding myself looking at words like TERATOPHILIA… my last novel. My Pinterest and my Instagram, well two more reasons I’m a dominant and inspiring brothel owner, but they don’t have business plans for those things.

My point is as I’m always saying is that everything I want is impossible, immoral, illegal, and insane so you can’t sell to me, you either want nothing or everything and you know where I fall into, and it’s too damn much. A few hours of my time, a few words, courage, a heart, having some balls, guts, then again yesterday I told Pizza Hut they were too high, $24.00 not to deliver a pizza and for damn sure I ain’t paying MORE to pick one up because everything in life, Its Ads Up, Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 215 ~Forty, William To Will~

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All it takes to motivate me, sleep, sex, or a speech and that also explains why I’m not writing, and at this rate, I’ll never make it to forty but then what’s my age again… does it matter to the man in the mirror? Forty, William To Will, but not yet.

Friday, February 1, 2019

Episode 215 ~Forty, William To Will~

Hey Lady Sophia,
How To Make One Million Dollars, forget who you are; can’t say I have ever seen myself as an actor, I don’t use a pen name, I have nothing but respect for porn stars but “Willie Long Stroke” will probably never see the light of day, and B III is camera shy. We are who we choose to be, but the thing is I feel sort of like a transformer instead of one that should constantly “EVOL” if you spell that backward you get love but anyway it’s like every day I forget who I am to be either worse or what others expect and then you.

I need you to remind me of whoever; leave it to a man to want to know what he looks like through a woman’s eyes… in touch with his feminine side, someone said about Todd Chrisley. Make no mistake Lady Sophia, I would fuck the Hell out of Savannah Chrisley (watch your language) needed to get some manhood points back after this morning finally losing my “No Fap” streak after forty days. All it took was Court Carmody, my MILF pornstar, Savannah Chrisley, Ellen Page, and Sabrina Nichole; can’t say I’m not equal opportunity pervert.

A man can say more with a woman on his arm than anything but god I love writing, and so you ask me Lady Sophia why I’m not doing it more often, why don’t I FOCUS… hell, I need to write a list of words like that. No, I would rather listen, if you asked me did my father ever give me any sage advice then the answer is no, but I spend my days on Spotify getting MOTIVATED by Eric Thomas, Tom Bilyeu, Fearless Motivation. On Youtube I see videos of Greg Plitt, Will Smith; I read Dennis Hof and how I am trying to finish Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov, never too old to stop learning, a plethora of dirty things made so dull.

Something I never want to be, BORING, AVERAGE, a TRYER and I’m possibly that much worse Lady Sophia but mostly I’m EXHAUSTED, and as the song goes, It Doesn’t Matter, but here we are having wasted another day. In a little more than five years I will be forty, and if I live that long I can’t only be Will, I refuse, but I see a better man slipping away daily, Forty, William To Will.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 214 ~Will A Tight Lip~

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Shut-Up, sit down, scratch, or more like punch the keys, get to grinding but I instead stay between the sheets, the bar searching, or the billfold, pretending I’m doing something, thinking of all I should honestly be doing. Will A Tight Lip

Thursday, January 31, 2019

Episode 214 ~Will A Tight Lip~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
How To Make One Million Dollars, if anything my mind is quite tight-lipped about these things but then I ask myself again, what am I scratching about, which pains do I stifle, and why do I continue a seemingly endless search.

I have plenty of time to be angry about what I’m not writing but as for what I am beside this conversation; names, nickels, and the Neanderthal ways of lesser men I would like to think. Something I have discovered about an aversion to “Fapping” if I have not said this before but your hunter’s instincts turn up quite a few notches; it makes you want to go out, makes the once ordinary extraordinary, and of course the idea to O, how else did the MILF get to me. I’m still staring at her tits, that’s how she wound up in my last novel but now it’s all cosplayers, pretty playthroughs, and Prom Night, I do mean with Whitney Wright, a younger reminder of two of my favorite MILFs honestly.

I’ve barely been keeping it in my pants, so yeah plenty of pain and the thing I learned about pain is either people can’t hear, hurry it, or help “mostly.” One more reason I’m a dominant, I need a submissive’s pain to be louder than mine, I don’t want her to crave it, but I don’t want her to hide from it or wish it away. As always with everything, I want to feel useful, of course, there’s aftercare but more, doctor’s flit between life and death, I want to go between pleasure and pain.

“The G-Spot…” between two pussy lips, how about the tongue, the moment a dollar bill exchanges hands, the pages between cover to cover and yet everything above that is what dictates whether we go on that journey, beauty, brains, bucks, etc. Didn’t mean to go with all my philosophy today but I guess I’ve lost myself in pictures on Pinterest attempting to find one particular gallery that for all I know might not even exist anymore. Will and the lost pin, pretty face, even porno, and already I have more than I would ever need; yet a reason to want to produce more with books, brothels, and breaths because you know you hold one in right before, well blast off.

Now that’s the one thing that I don’t hide, days counting, I want to be better, plus I’m not a celebrity in some rehab or prison yet… I keep things to myself these days, but that’s because I’m so lazy honestly; Will A Tight Lip.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 213 ~Fanging Innocence, Not Will~

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Does the wolf ever smile, does Jason, I would be ever so much worse if I were Freddy, but I tend not to loiter on Elm Street, but a man will dream, and since I’m not grinding my teeth, this isn’t Hell but as for Heaven. “Fanging Innocence, Not Will.”

Wednesday, January 30, 2019

Episode 213 ~Fanging Innocence, Not Will~

Forgive Me Echo,
How To Make One Million Dollars, it’s not by grinding my teeth in the middle of the night (more like after work), eating fast food all the time, or growling at the whole world though indifference is worse and why fear monsters, when there are always people.

My first sin is wanting to be like other people, well no I have my preferences… being the lone wolf, giving in to primal urges, and should I even mention the “Harmonic War” that’s something I haven’t thought of in a long time. Jacob Black went rogue, chased a girl that didn’t “want” him” and dare I speak “waiting” for Renesmee… probably less of a sin than wanting his body; not like that, hell I see plenty of that in erotica, and I’m not gay or skeevy, thank “The Hostage” I do mean the novel.

Let my second sin, please be that I couldn’t control my temper, punched a wall, a locker, and kicked a chair, you know, when I think I’m getting over my “aversion” for other black people, leave it to my general manager or a “stone” girl to bring back my rage. No blood from stones THEY say but is the innocent any better… Chloë Grace Moretz; beautiful, beastly, biting, might explain my mouth now, you think?

So is a third sin not thinking before I speak, zombies aren’t supposed to talk, no we only feed on the living, and for some that means brains, and even now I look at myself as being too good for that, still not writing my review of Depredation By Natalie Bennett. Now the body one more reason I want an apocalypse, a purge, a plethora of DVDs from The Innocence Of Youth collection, or the Vault Girls, little words and I have such a big mouth apparently, and my will…

No, that’s huge, my fourth sin is my pride, I think of how my grandmother would say I was full of it, and how whenever I got into trouble I expected to get away with it because I was small, silly, something no one could be bothered with, no wonder I looked for the big crimes. What is it about such a need for attention that people willingly destroy themselves or go looking for reasons to annihilate beauty, brains, and bucks, it’s almost as if we’re under a witch’s spell, so am I afraid now?

Always and never because people create monsters, werewolves, vampires, zombie’s and witches to hide their true selves but of course it’s people who are the best monsters and what am I Inspector Echo, only a man asking for forgiveness, but my “fangs” say it all; no Fanging Innocence, Not Will

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 212 ~Tooth Of Will’s Smile~

WillLeave a comment

Last week I said something about not being much of a talker and today, quite by accident I got a look in the mirror and found out why I shouldn’t open my mouth… better to smile with my eyes or even my lips. “Tooth Of Will’s Smile”

Tuesday, January 29, 2019

Episode 212 ~Tooth Of Will’s Smile~

Dear Future Wife,
How To Make One Million Dollars, better yet, what would I feel if I had it already, what if Publishers Clearing House rolled up right now, published a book, maybe having a publishing house one day? A smirk, a dreamy sigh, but a smile, there was a time. B III was my family, and I think about how I lived back then and what he and I needed, joy, faith, hope, of course, I call you love, but a smile wasn’t required.

Even now, my love, I can give you as many smiles as you would like, I’m sure if my firstborn weren’t eating, licking, or guarding he would wear one now, I want our children to be happy every single day. I am too but wearing a smile… THEY say it takes more muscles to frown than to smile but why do you think I’m so strong, trust me carrying a collection of grins is no easy task which is why I give them away so quickly. Maybe I want people to see this beautiful family we are, did we ever discuss the tooth fairy situation, and I go back to that quote from “Deep Down.”

“Nothing in the world is the way it ought to be. It’s harsh and cruel. But that’s why there’s us – champions. It doesn’t matter where we come from, what we’ve done or suffered, or even if we make a difference. We live as though the world is as it should be, to show it what it can be.” Angel

Is it wrong that I keep my smile from the children, again Triple B doesn’t care (developing cataracts, poor thing) but when the others are giving money to the ice cream man, imagining the story as I read to them, or wearing a mask on Halloween? Did you mind, the first time we kissed; like my B III, I can eat plenty of your cooking (the big piece of chicken) or how about waking up in the morning beside me. Now I want to hide my smile even from myself or like most things I do it differently because… yeah I know you’ll tell me not to worry when I look in a mirror and when I call you beautiful, even with my mouth it doesn’t make it any less real, your smile matters more.

Mine though, well, I still wear glasses for a reason, I wouldn’t fool around with Lasik but this is America and being a successful author, running a business, having a family, I’m happy even if the pearly whites won’t say it, but I suppose one day I’ll “try.” Can I show you what I feel without it, a requirement, to laugh, to talk, and hopefully we don’t go back to a vampire or werewolf craze though I liked Twilight, Blood and Chocolate, Underworld, and let’s not forget zombies Warm Bodies, yours and mine this is happiness, Tooth Of Will’s Smile.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 211 ~What Makes You Go Ahh~

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Probably wasn’t a good idea to write this in bed but how I wish it was Thursday or maybe I want to warm myself up considering what the weather is reporting; hell I’ll feel awesome if everything does close down for a minute. What Makes You Go Ahh

Monday, January 21, 2019

Episode 211 ~What Makes You Go Ahh~

Sixty-Ninth Rule Madam Justice

How To Make One Million Dollars, even with all my yawning, I should get to work, and so I have but of course, that was for somebody else, someone I have never met before; who else I haven’t met, the man who goes EUREKA, does EVIL, or shares his EROTICISMS.

If I’m going to sleep I should at least wake up with good ideas right, hell I’m still thinking about that dream I had a couple of weeks back and how they always relate to work, and I didn’t like how the General Manager was looking at me today. No not like that Madam Justice but you know how the idea of losing my job frightens me, though even when I lost my job as a “red shirt” I’m ashamed to admit it was more whimper and less bang because what else do we do in the face of horror? I never chose to become a writer, that was as natural as breathing but as for a million-dollar idea, well considering I’m still looking for that million dollars, for now, I’ll move on Madam Justice.

Keep moving wouldn’t you say, besides not having the brains, if only back then I was as into zombies as I am now… couldn’t say I ever thought about becoming a doctor but creating some wickedly devilish virus; there’s always a doctor in my novels. Maybe this counts as a eureka and evil thought, along with being a reason I’m a writer because words can be infectious and the mind is stronger than the body; getting into someone’s head, being the catalyst that drives anyone to do something is power.

It is an awesome feeling to know you are about to change someone’s life forever.
Tomorrow, When the War Began

These words Madam Justice, haven’t I said that all the erotic stories that I’ve read are products of women. There are the exceptions of “Begging For It” by Todd Michaels and also Sex Zombies by S Wolf and I’m sure there are others, but my point is the words, I’m a fan of one blog, not because of the pictures but the comments that come after. Now I’ve never been one for catcalling, and I’m sure it confuses women when I can call them divine one minute but have them saying “I’m your little whore” again thank you Exploited College Girls. Should I be praising Shailene Woodley, Jennifer Lawrence, indeed so many girls that I don’t know if they are brunettes or blondes, and again the things I would typically say in such a moment of ecstasy, but I’m strong.

Things That Make You Go Hmmm; I could use more of those or maybe not with my paranoia, pains, and of course penis because the stuff on my mind who, what, but when, comes usually is in bed or the shower. Those are the two places where I truly realize what I want out of life because at the day job it’s almost a constant chant of, “If I Had A Million Dollars” to live, What Makes You Go Ahh.

I Will Have No Fear