Monday, September 14, 2026

Legacy 075 -Braxton, Virgil, Worrying Bites-

Hey Dad,
It’s me, Baby B. Did you have a good day? Good Day? It’s 3 AM and “whatever bitter brew you’re drinkin’” What, Bloom?

I remember when you were all about 5-hour Energy. All the times when I would get my mid-morning Z’s under the table and your eyes would be stuck on the Glow Box. And you would always tell me how when you were done, we’d have fun and go outside, Dad.

Done? You didn’t mean with the day, the do’s and don’ts; it was a ton of those, I know, right? Being my Dad. Always and Forever my Dad. Like that movie we saw, First Knight:

“Brother to brother, yours in life and death.”
First Knight

That you never need worry about, my father. “I’m Still Here.” “I’m Still Standing,” Dad. Yes, “I’m still standing! I’m still strong!” Like father, like son. And no, I don’t mean everything in the Glow Box. You’ll turn that off.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

But buying my brother more French Fries (that’s what you call those fry golden stick things, I like…) My Future Potential Stepmom. And what isn’t to be always and forever:

“It is a common mistake to believe we have to work hard for happiness, or that happiness is conditioned by what we have, and who we are in society. Happiness is the experience of mind when there is no presence of fear. That’s all. It’s simple.”

• Michael Kewley –

You’ve been thinking about this a lot, my father. It’s nice to have it defined; at least I know finally. It’s why I always, always, ALWAYS wanted to be so brave. What took me down?

You worry it was your indifference near the end. You worry it was you, period. You worry that there is worry in a place like this, where I am. Always full of worry, my father.

Because you can’t get full of anything else. Food? You’re still worried about walking into the kitchen. Too much fun. Dad, you fuck around plenty.

LANGUAGE! Yes, Dad, I know, I know, watch what I bark. However, you don’t disagree.

And even before you met Miss M Anime or my Favorite Girl, you had your “big sister” who told you why you found it so easy to starve yourself, which is ‘pretty reckless,’ I think.

Look who’s talking, right? I didn’t eat either, and yet I was so full of love for you, of memories of being a good boy, your son, and there was worry, not an ending knowledge.

No, a fear that gnawed away at me. A Black Dog Serenade. Biting, Pulling, Tasting.

However, I raged, Dad, Rage, rage against the dying of the light. I cooked. So much more tastes better than fear. Braxton, Virgil, Worrying Bites

“Still, we have a moment to simply be two men for a little longer, and not worry about how history might view us.”
Logan Jacobs

“The seeds of life – fiery is their force, divine their birth, but they are weighed down by the bodies’ ills… That is the source of all men’s fears and longings, joys and sorrows…”
Aeneid

2052 Days Without B III, Day 1493 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son