Tag: Existence

Saga 104 ~ Virgil’s Resting B Face~

WillLeave a comment

I wish we could go back to wearing masks. I mean, nothing’s stopping me. Well, three shots, four if you count the doc taking my blood. But that first year, B always recognized me mask and all. And in 2022, Virgil looks at me? Virgil’s Resting B Face.

Thursday, October 13, 2022

Saga 104 ~ Virgil’s Resting B Face~

620 Days Without B III, Day 061 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? As always, your guess is as good as mine when it comes to this day.

Once again, Braxton, I’m time-traveling. But I will never forget the face you made when I’d come back. I’m trying hard not to cry today or give myself any reason to close my eyes. Blinking? I still do that plenty when I think I see you. Hell! It was only this morning when I called for you to take your medicine. We’ll get to me taking mine or the lack of meds in a minute. Only today is Saturday, October 8, 2022. But if there is one thing I know for sure, when it comes to 620 days, “I’ll Be Seeing You.” That sounds ominous. I mean, B, I’ll always see you everywhere I go, forever and always. Most of all, I’m protecting your spots.

Oh, what about your pillow? I wish I could have seen my face then. Now that’s strange coming from me, who avoids mirrors. To take a good look right now, B, all then and now. I’ve been worried about if the medicine is changing me. I’m sure I had a smidge of hope before. Today, I’m fearful. Three pills left. I only got a week’s supply to beat this infection. Do you remember how I became? Whenever you were running out of meds? The first time I almost killed you. Of course, that vet we hated was the one that saved your life. Maybe Braxton… Yeah, I got the thought that he could have saved you 620 days ago. Tears…

Not many days go without me crying over you. It’s not like Virgil is watching. And to further jinx myself. V hasn’t been hacking up all over the place. I wonder, has anything changed for him, for you? Today is one of those that I don’t believe but come Thursday? All I know is I looked into his eyes today, and you know what I saw. There was only black. I didn’t see myself or his happiness. To this day, I remember the last look in your eyes, Braxton. Why? Virgil’s face has those two tan furry patches beside his eyes. The color of you. Are you trying to tell me something, Braxton? I might be better served looking in the mirror. He Lives In You. Virgil’s Resting B Face

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Saga 100 ~Virgil’s Goals: To B~

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I think of all the things I should have said to B III. When I first picked up V, I didn’t ask him what he wanted? A dog that wouldn’t bite me. Who knows his way around a pee pad. And who was pretty lazy. But his goals, Virgil’s Goals: To B determined

Sunday, October 9, 2022

Saga 100 ~Virgil’s Goals: To B~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and I never want to worry about money again or you… And you? What do you want?

Now, how many times have I answered that? And yet you continue to ask it. First thing at 5:55 in the morning. Where is Braxton? Why isn’t he here, or why can’t he come back? Then you decided to be a selfish bastard and ask why it’s so cold. Why can’t you turn on the heat yet? You’re looking at your last pill come this evening. But you’re not better. Today, hell, this week should be all about Virgil. 57 days and you have no clue what he wants. Yesterday was the first day there was no hacking cough or fear. V’s a good dog… Only this morning, he was busy licking his… what nuts, ha-ha? You got mad. Like coughing up Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Gabby: The Little Dog That Had to Learn to Bark
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp My Poetry Book…
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 003 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

You’re a simple man “Ain’tcha?” Hell! If each of these things were Yabbos, you’d win. Between the Rumble Rose Anesthesia, Lily Bowman, and Chronicle 254 “Because You’ll Go B…” I think we can both agree that the world… Damn That! Your health would be much better if sex were the key to power. Not like you’ll be getting any this week. Did I mention I LOVE being a billionaire? But you, what do you want? Sugar cookies and tea? Yeah, I finished another book by an English writer, and you’re reading about dead dogs. I’d advise against it, but I was the one that picked out the book anyway. No, you can’t read any more about Yabbos. But you can always try Six Impossible Things:

Chronicle 254 ~Because You’ll Go B…~
  1. I WILL BE VIEWING My Best Friend, Gone: Coping With the Loss of a Pet
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

But none of them will bring your boy back. Then there’s Virgil. Have you considered… Nothing, I know. I thought I would feel so much better when lying on the couch twice this week. I did some reading, but last night I fell asleep during WWE’s Extreme Rules. I swear, again, only the women’s matches kept me watching. Should I say I’m sorry you’re tired? Trying the watch the whole thing was exhausting. Living even more so. You know right now what you want… but Virgil needs you. Yeah, for food and water in BRAXTON’s bowls. A soft place to lay. And so many trips outside. His goal is to live. For you (shrugs). With all the writing today, a doctor? Virgil’s Goals: To B

616 Days Without B III, Day 057 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 097 ~Virgil, B Missing You~

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B knew his spot on the bed. Virgil’s acquainted with his pillow. I really need to get his nails cut. Yet there was a plague at Petsmart. And with V’s hacking from me petting him. He might die or I might, walking that one aisle. Virgil, B Missing You.

Thursday, October 6, 2022

Saga 097 ~Virgil, B Missing You~

613 Days Without B III, Day 054 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Three guesses as to how my day was. I don’t know yet, with Time Travel.

I don’t remember when I stopped crying over you. Did I cry for you today? Again considering how Thursday went. Today is Friday, September 30, 2022. So not yet, Braxton. I didn’t even nap today to remember how you would lie beside me. Or you would be on guard duty. And Virgil hasn’t been in the mood. Braxton, I’ve been giving him space, B III. Plenty of room. But what if I gave him all the room in the world? Oh, I’m not taking him back to the Rebeccas. I’d like to think I’m a better person than that B III. What do you think? Every day I look at him more and more, and I’m beginning to suspect he ain’t you. Are you lonely?

I don’t know how to broach this subject without having the cops rushing here crazy. Braxton, maybe that’s what my dream was about. The lawman charging in here for me. Silly me, and here I thought it was for a crime. I’m sure I told Lady Sophia or Dear Future Wife something like that today. Hell! The crimes I have committed only today, my friend. As Sade would sing, “Is It A Crime?” I’m a black man living in America, B. I’m sure you don’t miss my political tirades. With “All These Things That I’ve Done.” You remain my worst crime. Your death is a tragedy. Mine would be… nothing. A parent, a dead child… SPOILER ALERT!!! The Cabin at the End of the World.

I don’t know how it will end yet, but I’m close. I see myself as Eric, walking with your body into a lake. You know, the thought of drowning scares me. A true punishment. If I were a man, I would have brought you back here. I’d laid you at the corner of the bed, your guard post. I would have lain in bed and gone to my drawer with the… Well, you know what I’m thinking, and here come the tears now. I’m alone anyway. Braxton, what about Virgil? It ain’t love, and if you’re reading this, then well, veterinarian? If it’s not nerves. V’s birthday and he needs a checkup; to make that walk to Banfield. I’m so lonely. Virgil, B Missing You.

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Saga 093 ~Apples, Oranges, Braxton, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Maybe the doc will say I’m dying? That’s if I go today. I’m trying to find excuses. And I didn’t work so hard Friday to be ahead and not go Saturday to be behind Sunday. B III died on a Sunday. The Walking Dead? Me? “Apples, Oranges, Braxton, Virgil”

Sunday, October 2, 2022

Saga 093 ~Apples, Oranges, Braxton, Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and you have accepted that you won’t be. At least not today. Your plans to live, hmm?

If I could give you one piece of advice today, it would be to stick to your plan. Be a Michael and not a Trevor… GTA motherfucker! Pardon the language. But that’s what happens when you wake up nearly on time. And yeah, it’s not a work day, but it sucks. Every day sucks, and you enjoy receiving blowjobs; go figure… Cut out the sex talk. Getting to the doctor early won’t do anything to relieve the anxiety. That’s not the point. Braxton was told a lie when he went to see the vet? I told him he was going to get better there. It’s October, a few weeks from Virgil’s birthday. What will you say to him about the vet.? Lies! Sweet Little Lies. Like these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Cabin at the End of the World: A Novel
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp My Poetry Book…
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 003 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

At least you’re eliminating one of the excuses not to do them. More coming. Now one win seems to be constant. Well, as long as you keep up the Reading Insights. Damn, Kindle ruining the streak. Speaking of streaks, you staying out of the doctor’s office. No, not today, ok? Noted, I should have gone yesterday, but I was afraid. Plus, you have food in the fridge because of me. But now, you’re no longer ahead in your writing. I thought you would have cried, checking the Day Job schedule. Will you cry with what the doctor says to you? Hell! If whoever said you were dying, it would be nothing like learning about Braxton. What about shame over Virgil? More than Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Gabby: The Little Dog That Had to Learn to Bark
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp My Poetry Book…
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

But you’re a survivor. When it came to my ear, though? I wonder what drove me to the level of madness that I had no choice but to see a doctor. Harboring fears about Braxton? Even now, you wish you were dead. But here you are, dreading the incoming week. Everything, I mean every little thing gonna be all right? Another day, another lie (sigh). What will you tell the doctor about what’s wrong with you? Humiliation? The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident from Tuesday, January 11, 2021? Why did you wait 10 months to do anything? What if it can’t be cured? A fitting punishment, you know. What if you can’t pay? “Men” to dogs, right? A mob, King, God, Nonbeliever? Apples, Oranges, Braxton, Virgil

609 Days Without B III, Day 050 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 090 ~Can Virgil B III~

WillLeave a comment

B III’s life or my own… no question, he’d be here. Virgil’s life or mine? Well, it’s only been 47 days. I don’t want it, and he certainly deserves it. Maybe I should stick to the dog books and not movie trailers. Knock at the Cabin… Can Virgil B III?

Thursday, September 29, 2022

Saga 090 ~Can Virgil B III~

606 Days Without B III, Day 047 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me Baby B,
Did you have a good day? It sucks that I wasted another one. Yeah, where have you heard that before, hmm?

At least then, I was talking to you. And look, here come my tears for Tuesday, September 27, 2022. I’m starting to feel like the dude from “Quantum Leap” or “The Time Traveler’s Wife,” B Squared. More like Triple XXX as this talk should have been had… Um, way back when. Hell! It would be better if we could talk on Thursday but, you know what. Humiliations Galore, B III. And on days like this, you would come running to cuddle. A minus against Virgil Vivi… On the other side of the equation, Virgil’s beside me Tuesday. One of these days, I will answer the question, is Virgil you or not? I can’t think about that right now, sorry to say. No, not because of that… A book inspired me?

I still feel bad that I’m not reading a book about dogs. I’m sure I’ve talked about the movie Knock at the Cabin and the novel; it’s from “The Cabin at the End of the World.” Now, your daddy’s an asshole, but you would listen to whatever. Anyone else, beware. SPOILER ALERT!!! So Daddy Eric, Daddy Andrew, and their daughter Wen have to choose. Out of the three of them. One has to be sacrificed at the hands of the two. The world will end if they fail to choose or follow through with the sacrifice. I’m 30% done with the book. It should be 75% by the time you see this. Did I want to say it out loud? Yes, no, I don’t know.

But it got me thinking again. First of all, you were or are… the jury is still out on Virgil. Well, my apocalypse buddy. We were or are supposed to face the zombie horde together. If there was a choice between your life and mine, there is no question. I would have taken your pain, Braxton. I would die for you. A part of me did. I watched you die. Writers play God, but we are not so. Throw Jesus to the wolves, and Hell, I take my own lumps, but I would not give you up for the world. And then I look at Virgil. If you were here… I’m not letting him go… yet, but his life, I wonder. Can Virgil B III?

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Saga 086 ~No V8 or B3~

WillLeave a comment

I think I’m getting how Charlie’s Grandpa Joe felt. Only it’s not candy that’s getting me up unless we’re talking Cameo’s version. And speaking of movies and music, “Pearl.” Yeah, she wasn’t healthy… in the head. And the rest? “No V8 or B3”

Sunday, September 25, 2022

Saga 086 ~No V8 or B3~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, but what is it they say, “if you haven’t got your health, then you haven’t got anything.”

The Princess Bride? As if you have time to watch a movie. As usual, the day begins with thoughts of your son. You wish those thoughts weren’t automatic, signaling indifference. Is that a win for Virgil? You’re still learning his language. Hacking up his lungs. Language-wise, it means he wants something. Hell! Maybe for me to remember his name? Yes, I called him Braxton yesterday. More proof of something being very wrong with me. Because of me, you’ll think about Pearl, Maxine, AKA Mia Goth. Um sorry? More like Fiona Belli from Haunting Ground. But for now, your only sin is dicking around at six in the morning. My crimes… what did I talk to Inspector Echo about? Oh, it wasn’t these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Dog Under The Bed 3 by DJ Cowdall
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp My Poetry Book… SOON
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 005 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 003 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Speaking of failures rather than successfully reading another book. It can’t be healthy to keep reading about dogs. At least in the last three books, the dog has lived. People, however? Well, women. This gets us back to what I’ve been watching and what you’re doing now. Trying to stave off madness, misery, and the macabre with some big mammaries. Now you know that’s not healthy. But with how I was talking Saturday and what you’ll dread all this week. Wednesday is not going to be a good day for you, okay? Don’t lose hope. Yeah, we might finish this conversation on time instead of seeing how gross you can be. Or the book you want to read. Success as a failure. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Cabin at the End of the World: A Novel
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp My Poetry Book…
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Why do you feel so bad wanting to read something else? The books that haven’t been about dogs were somehow justified. Amazon’s damn reading challenges. To feel accomplished doing something when there has been nothing. Can’t take care of yourself. That remains to be seen, but it doesn’t look good… so far. Obsession over everything but life and love. Lust, of course. But between Virgil and the air conditioner, you’re not naked… yet. Perhaps you should catch up with OnlyFans since all that writing’s done? How about writing down the dream I had, or you could go and see a doc, but you can’t or won’t. You can at least check. Because Sprite and chicken noodle soup… um really? Other food? No V8 or B3

602 Days Without B III, Day 043 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 083 ~To B Broken V~

WillLeave a comment

I never had the heart to get B fixed. And I didn’t have a say regarding V. What’s done is done. He has other things wrong, and I can only imagine what happened. As for me, breaking again, broke perhaps, and broken always. To B Broken V

Thursday, September 22, 2022

Saga 083 ~To B Broken V~

599 Days Without B III, Day 040 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Considering I’m talking to you on Sunday, September 18, 2022. And you can probably guess…

I keep saying it, Braxton. Anytime I feel that this existence is too much, all I need to do is whisper your name. The day you left makes everything look more bearable. Even my Emergence. I know I need to stop. But this damned month has been one gigantic clusterfuck. Pardon my French. I don’t swear around V… um or you. Mental Instability comes later, but this Sunday, I’m broken. Yeah, surprise, surprise. I’m broken every Sunday, but this morning, B. Isn’t it ironic that you knew you had to be quiet because The Walking Dead or a spinoff was coming on? Then I silenced you permanently. I know. I’m sorry, Braxton, it just hurts. You know me, B “I’m just a sucker for pain.”

First, I had a conversation with your grandfather about the air conditioner. His “friend” is coming to fix it Monday, which means… The Hell if I know, but Virgil’s temperature? Or what about my temperament? Again, we’re talking today because I’ll be in a rage come this Thursday. I hate myself, but sometimes it’s nice to have company. Oh, and money. With all the hours I’ve been getting at the Day Job. Did I mention more tits? Yeah, that was to the Man In The Mirror. Again it’s Sunday. And while I’m not ashamed to talk about getting off on nice tits. You liked your Aunt’s yabbos a lot B. I’m trying to get off a shift at the Day Job. I can’t take it.

So why don’t I publish a story and never have to walk into that Hell again? The burning in the house is nothing to my rage, madness, and the Humiliations Galore at the Day Job. I can keep cool with my betrayal of you in the Ninth Circle. I could save some cold hard cash. But what’s your grandfather planning these days? Hell! I forced a window open in some kind of way. You don’t mind me calling on your strength. But memories and guilt B. Especially when my body feels some sort of way. Like the heat, I usually try to ignore it, but it has its moments. Like the tears that appear for you around 4 in the afternoon. To B Broken V

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Saga 079 ~B Tripping Over V~

WillLeave a comment

It’s hard standing on my own two feet. There are so many reasons, and the heat is a new one. And that’s considering I’ve lived in the south since I was about 6, and now I’m 38. Well, that’s trippy. Braxton met me when I was only 21. B Tripping Over V

Sunday, September 18, 2022

Saga 079 ~B Tripping Over V~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and if anything, I’d ask you to watch your step this week. I’m not being a douche.

No, I save that for the little douche I once called my son, B III. Funny you can joke about something like that. Any tears? Um, you did have a nightmare; you were chased. Pro-Life. Yeah, I think I had enough of the media this week. One more reason you started with an audiobook and not any social media. I’ll tell you, last week it was like the world’s hellbound. If you’re going to Hell and make no mistake, you are. Sorry I made it one more week. But since you’re screwed anyway, it might as well be for something you did. Killing Little B. And what about Virgil? Can’t say I was going out of my way to help him acclimate. Six Impossible Things?

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Dog Under The Bed 2 by DJ Cowdall
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp My Poetry Book… SOON
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 005 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 005 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

No, I wasn’t tripping… cut to me about ready to smash the bedroom window with a hammer to get some air. When’s the last time the thermostat read in the seventies? Burning! Then there’s the fact that I left Virgil to that as I went out and let Humiliations Galore ensue. Whether it be going to PetSmart (to buy Virgil’s food). Or finding my way to Subway. And then when I got the window open well… First time I’ve turned down porn. You know what I mean. I bought a new OnlyFans subscription. This morning you were tripping over your dick for Presley @thesaviorswife. Amongst other things. Oh, much worse. You’re tripping over the big bed and out the window? There are Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Dog Under The Bed 3 by DJ Cowdall
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp My Poetry Book… SOON
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 005 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

And while you’re not busy tripping and falling in love with the ball, a fluff sleeping in the next room, he needs you… Hell! To save him, and you can’t even save yourself right now. Or maybe you’ve forgotten, and yes, we both did, that you’re sick. It’s why I bought another thing of Cranberry juice and a whole bunch of chicken noodle soup. Doctor? Well, between all that money your “father” “stole,” you couldn’t go. Today, tomorrow, Ah, life. Maybe you’ll trip over your underwear, and today will be the day your “father” calls. There’s tripping down the stairs and breaking the gate that would free V. Doesn’t it beat being chased and murdered by a Pro-Life activist? In Dreams. B Tripping Over V

595 Days Without B III, Day 036 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 076 ~The V List B~

WillLeave a comment

I got a kit with a new dog checklist when I first got V. He got a free bag of food; almost out. A leash and a harness I can’t for the life of me figure out. Figures, but I can’t figure out this existence, and I make a list on Sunday. But The V List B

Thursday, September 15, 2022

Saga 076 ~The V List B~

592 Days Without B III, Day 033 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Seeing as how we’re speaking on Friday, September 10, 2022. Well, my existence is pretty…

There isn’t a word, or I’m too lazy to find it. Hell! I want to be with you right now. You know I can’t say what I want “JIC.” But long story short, I hate weeks like this B III. Anytime I get a long week like this, I think of everything I had going on. But Braxton? You, my son, boy, and best friend, didn’t make the cut. Even now, I had to talk to Lady Lu and Inspector Echo after. And I’m not sure if I’m looking after you or Virgil as he lies here B. Every day, I have to count the similarities and the differences. It helps me not to worry about other things. Well, two, anyway. You like Yabbos too.

Even today, I was reminded of what I started when you left. With Virgil here, let’s say I haven’t been trying to make any more money that way. Cash money. How I wish that was my only punishment for how I failed you. I’ve been relying on that failure. Braxton, I know you wish I wouldn’t do that. Using your death to make myself feel better about all my other sins. Is that what I’m doing? One more list to set and forget whenever. At the moment, it’s two things that are haunting me. Ok, maybe three? This weather. Braxton, first it’s because I have to survive this week or I have? And second… yeah, there’s Virgil. What kind of father was I? Am I?

I haven’t learned my lesson yet, have I? I don’t want to accept this truth. I’m a parent again, and it isn’t all about me. If I knew it was you, Triple B, no ifs, ands, or buts? Talk about me keeping promises after E-Day. I didn’t get one gift, and yeah, not asking. Granddad… did I hear from him again this week? Is the bank account full, brimming? Never which is a shame. I owe you so much, and Virgil needs things, and I don’t know where to start. Your pictures or his bedding. New bowls for him or a Cuddle Clone, ha. Should I be grateful for this week to afford any of that stuff? I paid for V’s life. Death’s cost? And Happiness? The V List B

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Saga 072 ~Better B’s Advice V~

WillLeave a comment

King Ezekiel was just “Some Guy” in The Walking Dead. And let’s not forget “Sum Dum Goy” in “The Last Dragon.” And speaking of remembering, Tuesday, September 11, 2001, “9/11.” Yet if I could give myself any advice on existence… “Better B’s Advice V”

Sunday, September 11, 2022

Saga 072 ~Better B’s Advice V~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and you wouldn’t listen to a preacher anyway. A motivational speaker? Your father? You’d be dead already.

Well, that’s one thing that isn’t going away at the start of the week. The memory as to why either. Drinking, doing drugs, or your dick sucked wouldn’t help the overall problem, so why bother? You’re being STUPID! Hell! You’ll get only peer pressure in the mirror and Virgil Vivi’s eyes. No, you’re not there with him yet. Looking into his eyes and seeing who you want to be, ha. Funny that a long time ago… What? Braxton’s been gone 588 days. Virgil’s first month. Anyway, I made a list of things I learned from Triple B and then lost it. The only man worth listening to, and you don’t have his words anymore. What can Virgil say with nearly 30 days; Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE Finishing The Title The Dog Under The Bed, DJ Cowdall
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE Finishing A Shopping Trip To Help Virgil Vivi Stay Cool
    Completed
  3. I WILL BE Making An Attempt At Getting Anything Published To Make Some Cash
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VIGILANT For Sexual Endeavors, For E-Day, Somehow, Someway
    Failed
  5. I WILL BE VALUED If Only To Myself By Finding A Prize E-Day
    Completed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, So I Maybe The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Is it honest to say I did three of these things? If anything, you’re as confused as Virgil is right now. And getting as scared again. As V’s coughing fits have returned, so what now? I know last week was all about not learning from the past. A year of advice, experience, and learning for what? To be 38 and sound more and more like some emo teen every day. If you had your way, you’d go back to the day when you read the Basic Bitch’s words. Eek! What did I talk about earlier this week? A list of the worst days? Another list

  1. Braxton’s Death
  2. E- Day
  3. Tifa’s Mature Dress/Zoe Colletti, January 11, 2022
  4. Lesson 001 July 2, 2017

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Dog Under The Bed 2 by DJ Cowdall
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp My Poetry Book… SOON
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 005 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

While we’re on the subject of bad days and things you won’t be doing, like being a better American… Tuesday, September 11, 2001. Twin Towers, The Pentagon, Senior Year, yep. What about being a better friend? We could talk about Virgil being in his own room at the moment. Because being around you… Talk about seeing anxiety. V’s learned much. What can I tell you to do? I know what I want to say, but it involves closing your eyes. You could always go back to sleep. I finished a week of blogging because this week is going to suck. You could catch your breath after your toes curl or why bother at all, hmm? Breathing is so overrated. But Virgil? Better B’s Advice V

588 Days Without B III, Day 029 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will