How to Fireproof Happy

Plenty of days I don’t think Happy even exist but why should I be happy on this particular day, shouldn’t I be happy every day or at least be allowed to look for it in my own way, even in my darkness. “How to Fireproof Happy” don’t expect any candles

A star, a wish, just the one
When I can’t even recognize my own name
So here comes the sun,
Only there is pain, there are flames
Can you make this day snappy?

How long was it until my parents were through?
They don’t even admit their mistake
Their wish didn’t come true
either, oh the heartbreak
with this day but mammy and pappy

can’t we all agree
to blame someone, anyone as the cake melts
because the last thing we need is me blowing
anything else, since I’m going to Hell
As I walk through the valley

of the shadow of death for
I know there is no other path and you know
the same. So on this day I ask for nothing more
not a candle, not a bulb, not an inferno
nothing as sappy

like the knowledge that I am still alive
This does not make me a liar
Just like five fingers don’t always mean goodbye
I didn’t start the fire
So maybe I can still see the happy

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Wake Up and Smell the Nuts Everyone

The Catholics think they have some bad publicity but there are still plenty of them running around, not to mention several other “churches” glad I got to read about a fictional one for a change. Wake Up and Smell the Nuts Everyone, it’s pretty crazy.

“It’s only forbidden, but nothing to be ashamed of”
― D.S. Wrights, Wake

For the most part, no, I mean it was a bit slow in going but once it picked up, I was in a way rooting for the villains, not all the way to the end of course but I was somewhat impressed by the sheer villainy. Nothing to be ashamed of story wise though the editing, I’m no editor, not in the slightest, except when I’m noticing these things every few pages… seriously me being a writer, it puts the fear of God into me.

Speaking of God, I always applaud any of author with the guts to go after the religious even if they are a “cult” and we all know these sort of groups, lie somewhere and nobody can escape unscathed. You won’t find any voices of reason in this book, either everyone is crazy or lying to some degree just to maintain, whatever they hold sanity to be. Character development pretty much lies on one concept, how crazy are you and when will you cross the line.

Nobody embodiments that more than our antihero Samael, and the heroine Anna, Samantha, Anna, trying to be Rachel it gets pretty confusing for both characters and reader alike. I guess love is sort of crazy when you look at it and of course, this is one of those stories where somebody has plenty of cash on hand, and while it doesn’t justify the crazy, I’m sure plenty of women will read it. Guys too if they have ever had such and such a dark urge and I will not delve into that rabbit hole, here.

So if you’re ready for crazy and a whole lot of dominant males though I was surprised by mother Rachel which shows women can be just as evil then this is a decent read, I won’t say good, for plenty of reasons but again we will get into that in a bit first the rundown.

Crazy mom, decent grandparents, indoctrination into a cult, predators, molesters, oldest crimes in the oldest traditions, girl falls in love with a boy/man-child and then escapes without him, not her choice. Retaken by the cult, boy/man-child has been warped and still crying out for daddy’s acceptance is going to train the girl and if you’re into this genre you can sort of see where this is going, not rocket science.

Now a part of me actually wants to say I sort of agree with Samael because I know how churches/cults can be that’s why you start with children but the ending in a way negates all that. Him being convinced that Anna betrayed him but he was already grown if he could break through the conditioning long enough to help her escape how could he be so sure it was all her fault. He truly got me in the end though, you don’t see many stories that don’t end with a happily ever after scenario, a change of pace indeed.

In all fairness, with Anna’s background, anyone would be messed up too and the captivity doesn’t help with that so her staying the same throughout is par for the course. I do think her character was somewhat beyond belief but again maybe it was her upbringing that kept her from screaming bloody murder for the most part. The scene between her and Samael was explosive when they finally got her virginity out of the way, though the teasing was awesome as well, to an extent, it grew tedious after a bit but the stories of Samael’s past with Rachel were wow with a bit of sick to go with it.

I think the ending could have been something more if the other characters were flushed out, don’t get me wrong we get back stories to most of them but again beyond belief when Anna can just present an idea and okay it’s been years nobody thought to do this? The Church of the Second Reckoning and everything maybe the author could have flushed Joshua out more, and explained how he kept power, though I have seen infighting in most churches.

In all I give “Wake” three stars, it was dark, it was creepy, not the typical ending and pretty twisted indeed there was plenty to like and if the author would just get some new editing and crank up the sex but maybe that’s just me being a guy. The editing just pulls you out of the story, you’re falling right into and next thing you know you’re ripped out.

I suppose my favorite part is when Anna is alone with the Samael’s other two brothers, I guess I should also mention spoilers but come on, everyone knows when it’s coming. Personally, I could have used a bit more graphical language but just the fact that the hero doesn’t come in and save the day just in the nick of time. Also the ending, there are few books especially a standalone that leave characters still screwed up and just saying, okay this is life so deal with it as so.

Other than the editing, I think Anna’s character, like mother, like daughter, came off a bit too cunning with her manipulations, in a place where people are killing each other left and right, nobody had an inkling to I don’t know get to Joshua? The teasing got a bit annoying after awhile, I’m never sure with erotica but some are a straight sexual smorgasbord and others are, maybe, still waiting, and okay. Also while Sam’s dad was lying to him, why was everybody lying to Anna, okay she’s a kid but the fact that they lied while soothing themselves did nothing for Anna, the characters could be pretty dense if they weren’t psychotic or just plain mad; genius and insanity.

This isn’t something I would have sought out, probably because of the religious jargon but it hits the right note between what we know in the news and completely unbelievable. Three stars, pay the money for the editing I know I will, now if you’ll excuse me I might actually need a nap after this, exciting and my brain hurts.

Lesson 066 ~The Time Warp Again~

I remember, doing the time warp, no actually I remember doing my own thing but plenty of people felt like they could do their own thing, probably when time warp was playing I’m sure. The Time Warp Again, when dressing up was fun and possibly still is

Tuesday, September 5, 2017

Lesson 066 ~The Time Warp Again~

Hey Lady Lu
No Fear, though when I was a child I told some “friends” that I wanted to be the headless horseman and instead I went as the white power ranger. Humiliation started early not to mention, that was also a time when you could say “white power” and not get your ass beat if you’re a black kid living in suburbia attending Trunk or Treat at a church.

I guess all my memories from the past weren’t so bad, from White Ranger to Darth Vader and how many years did that take I wonder? From romantic nice guy attempting courtly love to pervert, yeah I think I missed a step as Tony Montana would preach, such a thing would only work if you have tons of money to back up such an endeavor. Yes, Lady Lu, it isn’t even October yet but today’s lesson is The Time Warp again and I still stand by the principle that time travel is a bad idea and of course that also includes getting older, nearly time.

“In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women.” – Tony Montana, Scarface (1983)

Yes, there was a time when I would even dance during these days of “Sapphire” remember my uncle got married right on the day, I swear it seems even fate conspired to rob me of that day, my sister was born the day after, as I said my uncle got married on it, and how about Amanda Todd, does anybody still remember that? How about the fact that while I’m “leveling up” I don’t seem to be evolving, I remember when I thought “Pokémon” would be my last hurrah and then The Hunger Games, Divergent, pretty much Young Adult novels, to erotica, a big leap forward considering I began to blend the two. How about what “Indiana Gone” asked me the other day about “The Rocky Horror Masquerade Ball” isn’t my answer supposed to be yes to all of these things, though honestly, neither one of us got the movie.

Don’t I want to go back to a time when I was free to do whatever, I mean haven’t I been getting a taste of that as time moves forward though to be fair I have been hiding out in the cave right? So what have I learned today… that even if the past is gone why not try and do something with the time I’m given, would that be something The Time Warp Again?

I Will Have No Fear

 

Bravely Lit

It’s getting around that time and I’m sure I have my picture, my name, hell probably a police file, I can pretty much guarantee my name is in lights and will be but not in any flattering away and I am always chasing the light aren’t I. “Bravely Lit”.

Don’t sing, don’t wish, don’t say
because I have, on all the stars
but they still seem so far
and the cake is melting.
Were you trying to compete with the sun
I’m on the run

fam with every reason to stay
and that’s why I get high.
Those neon lights are in my sight,
only I want “Easy Street”
where I spread my love and fly
to know that I’m alive

I’ll make some days, always
From “how does that look daddy”
I’ll sing let’s see
while the police fingerprint me
I won’t lie about this
No not to my kids

when under fluorescent lights I’ll lay
with doctor’s asking what’s my age again.
The lights from where I been
don’t follow me six feet
So today, teach me to be brave
blow out the candles, a few more to the grave

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Lesson 065 ~Give Up, Get Off~

Well, why do men do most things, take a chest full of gold, world domination, for me you could put Jennifer Lawrence at the finish line… though I would take all three honestly. Give Up, Get Off, I’ve done one and I am trying not to do the other

Monday, September 4, 2017

Lesson 065 ~Give Up, Get Off~

Hey Lady Lu,
No Fear… no shame, no pride, no real movement but there is a belief, there is faith, suppose I see why the Christians do it, though it’s a lot easier when you’re not threatened. Don’t worry, I’m not about to go on some political tirade or talk about such and such from Columbine, today’s lesson is about giving up, and getting off.

“Sometimes, when you win, you lose.
Sometimes when you lose, you win.” – Annie Nielsen, What Dreams May Come (1998)

Biology maybe, not just these lustful urges but how I have given up so many things in my life and I’m sure I could come up with a million at excuses, and while I may be somewhat of a pop culture whore, YOLO. You only live once isn’t that what they all say and even if I do something those million times out of pleasure (don’t flatter myself right) what is so wrong with feeling good for a while? Especially when it helps with the thinking process, so maybe tomorrow my world will be looking a lot better or so I am trying, and I should be grateful, I am.

“First you have to give up, first you have to *know*… not fear… *know*… that someday you’re gonna die.” – Tyler Durden, Fight Club (1999)

The choices that people have to make every day and for the most part I dealing with only first world problems and the devil’s luck. You know how I have been trying to talk more my lady but what if I had yesterday; what was I supposed to say to the cashier “excuse me but you gave me too much money” I made nearly a hundred bucks for keeping my mouth shut, perhaps that was karma for helping out a friend. I’m no millionaire like Joel Osteen but I actually felt pretty bad when I wouldn’t even donate a dollar to the Hurricane Harvey Relief, probably shouldn’t have said that.

If anything that brings up another interesting point, not a day goes by when I’m not flooded with petitions, causes I believe in, authors asking for my opinion after reading some of my reviews, the list goes on. Have I ever said I wanted to save the world, I know I probably have said I’m more the villain but does it make you the villain to know you can’t save everyone, maybe just don’t look?

“It’s the worst. It ain’t fair, but you can’t kill yourself. Sometimes you’ve just got to let go and let God take care of it. You’ve got to accept it.” – Lester, John Q (2002)

 

What have we learned today, I might get off but I haven’t given up, I’m grateful to be me and not them strangely enough and before you label me a complete louse I put up my money to save three and I think that should be enough for now I think; Give Up, Get Off.

“I came here to save my wife and my two children and… seven billion lives… it’s too much. I just hope I’m, I’m smart enough and brave enough to save three.” Serge Leveque, The Core

I Will Have No Fear

Rut On Earth

Every day is exactly the same as the song goes but that isn’t always a bad thing, especially when you’re living with anxiety, you know just how much energy you’re going to need, you can put one foot in front of the other “Rut On Earth”

The sun can only dig so far
while the other stars play big wigs
Having so many promises to renege
upon they say what they are,
job creators, they are those kings, czars
giving me this full-time gig
asking me why I never studied trig.
How bizarre

that it doesn’t hurt
I suppose Atlas is used to the abuse
Walking, running, these combat boots
Don’t run in the grass, or play in the dirt
and if you see a pretty girl in a skirt
pretend I was one of those deaf-mutes
though the point is probably moot
Nowadays it’s a concert,

left, right, repeat, but what
if there was a way not to be a slave
to the rhythm to live brave,
nut up or shut up
Only the ground has become a slut
for punishment and how depraved
is it for me to dig my own grave
one day and a time, a rut?

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Lesson 064 ~What A Wonderful Rut~

I see empty roads, not a person true, okay excuse me for trying to rewrite a song but it truly was a beautiful world with no people in it, not the usual state of things but it’s our routine to walk in the morning Braxton and I. “What A Wonderful Rut”

Sunday, September 3, 2017

Lesson 064 ~What A Wonderful Rut~

Hey Lady Lu,
No Fear and don’t call it a comeback, or God’s plan the way I live my life, and what some would call a rut I would sing What A Wonderful World. Not all sunshine and lollipops, but they’re not all they’re cracked up to be either and I could all be doing better I suppose, I am by no means satisfied but comfort is doing any favors.

I should probably make a new rule just for that, seems I’ve been getting lazy, you should have seen me yesterday but I am finding my writing voice again to a certain degree, just too bad you haven’t seen much of that here yet. What this is only the third day, I wonder how long the pilgrims stayed on the boat, what about Martin Luther King Jr. might have been comfortable just being a small town preacher. Some yes some people might indeed call it a rut but maybe it’s just “prudent planning” and it’s not like anyone is telling me to remake the world?

I suppose you have to imagine what God’s typical day must have been like for him to go about creating this Sims universe, at first it’s pretty exciting, then you’re Johnny on the spot having to micro manage everything, then you’re letting the world run itself and finally you go all “Mortal Kombat” with your death scenarios or you’re just watching it burn for the Hell of it. Today I imagined paradise as Braxton and I walked along watching a world gone to rapture, just let me keep Braxton and maybe I should get an engineering degree and we would be just fine. No, my dear Lady Luna I want to be a writer but to be fair I never went to school for that either and any real writing I did even left me in the counselor’s office or gave me the juvenile blues, and now I’ve grown up.

Yes, of course, I say that but handling responsibility doesn’t make you a grown up or a man, we do what we have to and repeating the same thing over and over, does that count as practice or downright insanity. Call it what you will with my life or my survival, the fact remains at least I’m still here right?

So what I have learned today, is that in a way I want it that way, with a few tweaks so, What A Wonderful Rut.

 

My Tea, Mighty, Will

I suppose coffee drinkers might feel something like this to a degree, know plenty of people that don’t think at all until they have a cup but as for myself, I’m learning to enjoy Tea Time, remind me not to watch Cathouse on HBO “My Tea, Mighty, Will”

My tea, mine and not yours
iced and sweet maybe
going in mugs all fancy, see
how I had this craving, and you’re just one more
today or tomorrow, the day after
Yearning to be more than a chapter

My, my, the stories, driven by testosterone’s
imagination, and a lifetime of biology
God’s prayers, wishes, a bit of astrology
have men wishing they were grown
to be whatever this world needs.
You believe

my cross, my sacrifice, no not a lowercase t
Is all about… regret, blame, insane, shame
Going to have me singing “You’re so vain”
Haven’t you heard I’m completely
totally… and wow this good
You want some, you should

While it’s still hot, basking in the sunshine
it’s the best part of waking up
learning not to think of a… I said what, what?
Lord give me my tea time

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Lesson 063 ~New World’s Price Tag~

Porn Star’s good graces $250.00, a new website $80.00, being nice $500.00, my dog’s life, priceless, though that’s not entirely true, keeping him healthy and groomed and I’ve been able to handle everything so far. New World’s Price Tag

Saturday, September 2, 2017

Lesson 063 ~New World’s Price Tag~

Hey Lady Lu
No Fear and nothing we can’t do without but still I can’t help but imagine the possibilities, all the things that you could have done, should be doing and will be at some point. Suppose I still have the ability to surprise myself from time to time, buying into this world or at least it’s people maybe.

“What’s the threat? We all sell out every day, might as well be on the winning team.” They Live (1988)

I’ve never had a problem with the concept of buying a woman, no I haven’t ever been that sort of man, not for lack of trying, I mean all guys pay for it, take Valentine’s Day for example, though that’s not a popular sentiment in any case. I consider myself a simple man to a certain degree like I told “Indiana Gone” if I can live without it, I’ll save my money. I’ve had my fair share of being an idiot though, I spent money on a porn star once for her birthday, I don’t suppose I can defend myself saying that she is the perfect woman, the goddess right?

“In this country, you gotta make the money first. Then when you get the money, you get the power. Then when you get the power, then you get the women.” – Tony Montana, Scarface (1983)

Anyway for today’s lesson, sometimes I spend money like there is no tomorrow, I mean why not live it up right when I usually believe that the world is going to end in five minutes or less. What about the idea that we spend money on the things, on the people that we care about, and for some reason that does always come back to women for me but I’m not a total schlub? That’s why I’m so surprised, on you Lady Lu I’m still creating a place and you’re fictional along with several other women who will inhabit this world, for another, well maybe a few you can call it madness, and on yet another, a friend needs help and I give it without every be asking, I know Joel Osteen can take a lesson from this I think.

“If a man expects his woman to be an angel in his life, he first must create a heaven for her. Angels don’t live in hell.” – an unknown quote

Maybe that’s what I’m trying to figure out Luna, I mean Braxton is my son and no price is too high, though I fear the day something comes to pass where I won’t have enough to give. He’s probably the one thing on earth that I finance without an ulterior motive but then what was I thinking yesterday with my friend?

Hell, what about this place, what have I learned today, in the end, Luna, the New World’s Price Tag.

One’s Cent Able Pants

What do you get when you cross, the “owner of a lonely heart”, a sagebrush ranch temptress, and the movie “They Live” and should I also mention “Fiddler On the Roof” perhaps? One’s Cent Able Pants, well it beats the pants Negan was talking about

Wearing out my poor heart
only to let it break
Making it restart
and to be some woman’s mistake
No, yes, maybe, which is

going to be, every word
I would ever care to utter
Really there’s a lot of pretty girls,
ladies somewhere or another
Snitches

believe it or not these eyes of mine
always saying baby, baby oh, “babe”
behave cause the gods are crazy, and the stars are blind
everyday
So it seems I’ll be needing stitches

cause some chicks drive a man crazy
However, did I figure that out?
If only I could be Jay Z,
could I be rich, out and about?
Kardashian style riches

Dare I dream “If I Were a Rich Man”
All to get lucky, quickie, some
Maybe it wouldn’t matter who I am
even if it were one million, one thousand, one hundred, but one’s
sensible pants and a Dame’s games can be a real bit… hehe wallets in my britches

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.