Tag: Message

Saga 320 ~ I’ll B Listening, Virgil~

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I’m listening to everything but B, and why? Because I’m not being the person, he thinks I am. He would give me one of his looks. And V’s in B’s room now because… Hell! At least he ain’t crying. I got no money to go anywhere. I’ll B Listening, Virgil.

Wednesday, May 17, 2023

Saga 320 ~ I’ll B Listening, Virgil~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now; this means I don’t have to listen to anybody or anything. The sound of EFFING silence!

Which is in my head right now because I don’t remember how this particular subject came up. I was at the Day Job “Dancing With Myself…” Please! Talking to myself. Anyway, Inspector, I was saying the saddest sound I ever heard was… then I blank. Inspector, do you want to know what the most horrific, helpless, heartbreaking sound is? B III. My son taking his last breath in this world right after. And right afterward, the vet told me, “He’s Gone.” Braxton’s heart, head, and happiness. Oh, I knew, I heard. And then the quiet. Next to that Inspector comes my first breath. No wonder I’m starting to hate meditation. Tuesday, Balance said, think of someone you have a “bad” relationship with. It’s me, hi.

But I was thinking of the ASM at the Day Job. You know how much I hate being laughed at. Next to that, the silence rears its head once again. My effing smile Echo. Disgusting. Why do I want to learn to kill zombies but love Necromancy? Killing the comedian. Inspector, I should kill the beggar as well. Again at the Day Job, when such and such a guy shows up, what do I start doing? Begging, beseeching, and bitching for his help Echo. I hate whining, kowtowing, and bending the knee. What kind of a man are you? Inspector, that’s something Suzy Lu asked. Well, not to me. YouTube is blaring in the background. Books, and lying alone in bed. Bitches, Man… Warm Bodies

I both want to and not. You know to listen to another woman. The worst sound in the world is the alarm clock blaring. Now I can say that for plenty of reasons but today. Inspector, I set it for midnight. That means again I restart another No FAPPING pledge. I hate the push of a button. Because, let’s say, seven out of ten times, it’s all about a porno. Hell! Inspector, I’m still listening to Succubus Lord yet again. And like I told one of the girls. I recall going to the barbershop with a folder full of bikini models. Why did I dare? Then there’s my moaning. Thinking, “Oh God, I’m gonna die alone.” Should listen to “my boys.” I’ll B Listening, Virgil

836 Days Without B III, Day 277 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 313 ~Lying Around B, Virgil~

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I both love and hate lying around? You know I love my naps. There are those two minutes I give myself calling to Braxton… He might come running for “medicine time?” Then realizing existing is a waste, and what I did last night… Lying Around B, Virgil

Wednesday, May 10, 2023

Saga 313 ~Lying Around B, Virgil~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now. Which means I could give a masterclass in lying. I feel like “kaka,” to be honest…

Because… I hate lying. Don’t get me wrong, Inspector. I lie a lot. Nine times out of ten, it saves “my” ass. No wonder I haven’t joined B III. “It’s in my biological imperative.” Eugene Porter was a terrific liar too. But I couldn’t lie to Braxton. Lying, Inspector. Because… I told him he was going to be ok. I would protect him, save him, and in the end. I can’t say I meant to go this way. But when I do something awful and then lie about it. Inspector, in full transparency, today is Monday, May 1, 2023. And yesterday, I effed up. I wish Braxton were here. Of course, in the manner in which I effed up. Braxton would be on punishment… time-out.

And Virgil. Hell! When was his last walk? Now that’s effing dark to say, Inspector. Usually, all we do is lie around anyway. Not today. Oh, don’t get me wrong, I’m effing tired. Worse, I’m effing horny. So much so that I’ll end up spending more money. Then what, Inspector? I’ll have the perfect excuse to stay in bed. Where can I go being broke? Not so broke as to give into every kink and fetish. Last night when I fucked up, I didn’t buy the book The 120 Days of Sodom. I read the reviews. Strangely Cherry reminded me. She wrote a tale that’s a bit out there for me. Do you want to know a secret, straight-up fact? SCAT IS A HARD LIMIT!

It’s hard enough picking up B and V’s… business. Yet I want two-legged children, ha-ha. Now that’s not a lie. No! Inspector, I want to do a particular brand of lying today, as with most days. I want to lie down and wake up with my boy. I pray for that… well I think about it anyway. You know how I feel about The Almighty, Inspector, whatever. At the moment, I want to lie down and go to sleep like I should have done last night. All I’ll confess to right now is AHEM, The Savior’s Wife… OnlyFans. Inspector, I effed up. Finally, I wouldn’t mind effing some P.Y.T. I’ll never say no to that. Love, Losing, Lying… Three little words. Lying Around B, Virgil

829 Days Without B III, Day 270 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 306 ~B We Trust, Virgil~

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I told B III everything. I had to give him “The Talk.” Regarding his “Aunt Carolina.” Like father, like son. The internet made things easier with books and… umm, beauty. I swear to keep track. And Virgil? Do I trust him? Did Dante? B We Trust, Virgil

Wednesday, May 3, 2023

Saga 306 ~B We Trust, Virgil~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now. Only I will take a Handy Dandy notebook over a portfolio any day of the week.

Speaking of which, I am continuing to time travel. Today is Saturday, April 29, 2023. Inspector, I can say I’ve been somewhat productive. I’ll lose more money on the 30th. Today, ha! I have a plethora of books to buy. I’m slightly pissed that I didn’t do it this morning. And before that, I said I’d do it last night. Then again… (sigh) listing excuses? That comes later. For now, let’s talk about books. Or how about the fact that I like Kindle? That’s Kindle and not Kendall, aka Professor Kelsey Williams… Sandra McCoy. Geez! Inspector if could make a list of distractions and/or women that get me hard. Anyway, I wanted to talk about that, to be fair. But hiding behind so many books.

Again better books than boobs. “This Is America.” Better books than bullets. My sin Echo. I bathe in Lust, not Violence (2nd and 7th Circles of Hell). Of course, that’s if I forget B III. I’m getting the 9th Circle for sure for what I did to my B. But not today. I’m still breathing. And with a father like mine… though, I couldn’t blame him if he kicked my ass for this one, to be honest. When We Were Young? When You Were Young. Hell! I’m a boy now. And as I sat in the barbershop today, I remembered when I had a folder of Jet and Ebony models. What the eff was I thinking when I was with “my” father and that folder.

Was I looking to die on that day? That’s another list I need to make. All the times I could have died. The only reason I’m glad I failed? It’s because, of course, I got to meet my little B. My son. Happy Memories? Inspector, how many times must I say it? I’m never Happy. Inspector, I haven’t been happy since I had my seventh birthday. What the Hell? Please! Those were the words that ended my happiness. However, there was a glimpse in 2002. Inspector, what was I supposed to say today? I wanted to write out all the chicks. So I could keep my pants on until later. Tell you the things I couldn’t tell Braxton. But trusting myself? B We Trust, Virgil

822 Days Without B III, Day 263 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 299 ~B It Goodbye Virgil~

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Hell! I wrote a letter to Satan once. No, I don’t mean Santa. I said bye to him when I said goodbye to the church. My worst goodbye? That’s my son, and when I wake up. “God gave me everything I want?” My boy, brains, balls? Nope… B It Goodbye Virgil.

Wednesday, April 26, 2023

Saga 299 ~B It Goodbye Virgil~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now. And while most are terrified by their greed. I don’t want to scare anyone. A lie

But let’s start with some facts. V is right here. And he ain’t going nowhere. Like the song “I’m right here and I ain’t goin’ nowhere You can turn tables, and you can throw chairs.” One thing that he and Braxton have in common. And speaking of which, Braxton is still dead. I never need reminding of that. Only it was something on Facebook… Inspector. What was it, hmm? Today it doesn’t matter. Yet I can’t say goodbye to Braxton or Virgil these days. Well, if you ask me which I prefer. Not that it’s a competition. Wake up dead? Of course, I mean me. It would be proper Inspector. To go with another song, “I’m way too good at goodbyes,” If I say them…

For example, if you’re waiting for another reason why I’m late talking to you, Inspector… I swear my dick has gone from two blonde models to a princess. There was Kaycee Barnes, Sandra McCoy, and Diane Lane “Unfaithful. A plethora of British BBWs, for sure. Hannah Harper and resting with Harmony Reigns “Fake Driving School.” So, the third song of the day? “Don’t know why I didn’t come.” Thank you, Norah Jones. I swear, Echo, geez. The days when I could watch porn and get back to business. Madness, Inspector. There’s the business of the Day Job when I walk out at the end of my shift. That’s that, ha. And, of course, my worst goodbye… besides my son leaving. Waking up in the morning

That’s because as soon as I turn on any of these screens. There’s always something, Inspector. Do you want to know what has me depressed today? Pop Culture whore… (Goes all Amanda Bynes, Ask Ashley) “THAT’S ME!” E, I’m going to get pretty stupid. Okay, so Carlie Jo is getting married. So is Suzy Lu. You can add Shelby from “Girlfriend Reviews to the list. Then Samantha “TBR Schmitt” is expecting. Becky Blow… pregnant. Now ask me, what the eff any of this has to do with me? Nothing. And I’m glad for them. But what have I said about manhood and fatherhood? Family? Killed my son, B III. There’s my Olds, my sister, Virgil? Love and Happiness? I think not. B It Goodbye Virgil

815 Days Without B III, Day 256 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 292 ~Humiliations B Gone Virgil~

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Of all the words … I would say LOVE is the most misunderstood. But then again. “This Is America.” The one that nobody seems to get is FREEDOM. Now if you ask me to stay in my lane as a black man. My word is Humiliation. Humiliations B Gone Virgil

Wednesday, April 19, 2023

Saga 292 ~Humiliations B Gone Virgil~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and as much as I act like a Republican and an “American Idiot.” One word… FREEDOM!!!

No, I haven’t screamed that at the top of my lungs while I don’t know. Trying to storm the capital, going on right-wing news, or being disemboweled… eww. (Shudders). Now you know why I take treachery, treason, so damn seriously. My punishment for B? What day is it, 808? But also I’m time traveling. So I don’t know what humiliations I’ve faced on this day. At this precise moment, though, I’m humiliated and embarrassed. What about motivation? One of these days, I’m not sure before this one, I meditated, Echo. For the record, today’s meditation was horrible. I have to find the time. Time Inspector. We’ll get to that. Anyway, in one of the better meditations. They ask for the WHY. There it was, FREEDOM!

The FREEDOM to be humiliated? I was thinking about Bella Thorne last night. Oh! Not for that Inspector? Sorry Bella Thorne. I like “Lonely” and all but Inspector. I’m “freaky.” Freaky but not a freak, and we go all into that, okay. It’s like Dennis Leary in this movie um:

“I wanna run through the streets naked with green Jello all over my body reading Playboy magazine. Why? Because I suddenly might feel the need to. Okay, pal?”
Demolition Man

Now if I were a better “man,” I might go the route of Posse (1993). A great man like King David (from the film) though I want to be Jesse Lee. Revenge? That’s something else I can say I want. Much like that feeling for “Sexual Healing,” it comes and goes. Did I say that?

“I’m talking about revolution without bullets. Revolution without violence or bloodshed. It’s easier to shoot a gun than it is to read a book. It’s easier to take a man’s life than it is to educate him and teach him about life. It’s easier to hate than it is to love.The revolution I’m talking about is a revolution of the mind and the spirit. And education, that’s the key. Education leads to freedom. Education is freedom. Education will teach you how to do it yourself as opposed to asking someone else to do it for you. And around it our own town… Freemanville!”
Posse (1993)

And 1993 was a good year, but what about something more current? Sucker Punch (2011) What’s My Age Again? Anyway:

“All I require from you is a slither of a moment. To have you not by force, but simply as a man and a women. To see in your eye, that simple truth, that you give yourself to me freely. Not because you have to, but because you want to. Now of course, for such a gem, I will give as well. I’m willing to give you freedom. Pure and total freedom. Freedom from the drudgery of everyday life. Freedom as abstract ideal. Freedom from pain. Freedom from responsibility. Freedom from guilt. From regret. Freedom from sadness. Freedom from loss. The freedom to be happy. Don’t close your eyes; I need you to look at me. The freedom to love.”
Deleted Scene, Sucker Punch (2011)

Okay, so FREEDOM or Humiliation? You know, I erased something I wanted to say, Echo. I talked about LUST a few days ago. Hell! The FREEDOM to be “As Nasty as They Wanna Be.” I’m way worse, Dear Echo. But that’s not why I’m a sinner, ashamed, and uh, guilty. A father’s greatest Humiliation is to be he who failed his children. Well, only Braxton. There’s the freeloader. I have to stop thinking that about Virgil Vivi. I know, Inspector. Do I want some FREEDOM back being without him? As if I’ve had FREEDOM Inspector. Even now, I sit here… I wanted to say a slave. Too far, Inspector? Much! But that is to exist. “Welcome to My Life” If only Humiliations B Gone Virgil.

808 Days Without B III, Day 249 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 285 ~Braxton Counts Virgil’s Colors~

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Are dogs colorblind? One of my last memories of Braxton, when he was nearly blind, was his running from his granddad into my arms. Hell! Green to live. Make his stepmom turn red. Black to join him. And V’s white. “Braxton Counts Virgil’s Colors”

Wednesday, April 13, 2023

Saga 285 ~Braxton Counts Virgil’s Colors~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, so I’m not in the lot that can paint with all the colors of the wind.

Hell! I’m having trouble seeing black and white. So that’s today’s first humiliation, sin. I’m time traveling, so today is Monday, April 10, 2023. Meaning this week’s gonna suck. Anyway, today I was supposed to write about Rule 287, “Some Are Born Many Times.” (Sigh) I’m still always thinking about my son. And his lack of reincarnation. V’s colors. Let me get this out. So I couldn’t read what I’d typed prior. And by accident, I repeated Rule 284. “Your Punchline Means My Punches.” Seriously, everything was sharper Sunday. Speaking of which, again, there’s Braxton and his brown, beige, or bronze coloring. My boy is/was the most beautiful thing ever. Then I remember seeing Virgil… Like Braxton spoke, “Can’t get more black and white, Dad.”

That was a mistake. Or maybe I’m crazy. I adored the brown around Virgil’s eyes. Inspector, you know I have an eye for the most beautiful things. Despite their expense. Shouldn’t I be eyeing green as in dollars? Again my focus has been shot to Hell. Well, since Sunday night. That was my loneliest time. Remember? The longest night without B. That was by the time you read this 801 days ago. Inspector, yesterday… I humiliated myself. Begging a girl I found on OnlyFans. Oops! Where’s all my money gone? As always, I would have spent way more than that for the “Lady In Red.” And no, I’m not talking about Ariela in Dirty Latina Maids. Though remembering her Inspector… Opening my eyes now. Woke!

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention today’s shooting. Well, Monday. How does anybody open their eyes anymore? Hell! How does the GOP even sleep, hmm? Money, Inspector? Again something else we have in common because I would rather be lost to the blackness. Inspector, what I mean is, if I had my way. I’d be with my B III… Know what that means? I would lose myself to the darkness I have inside me. Always and forever, Inspector. Braxton’s little brown hairs on my clothes. His love and protection. My pendant of us. And Virgil is as white as a ghost, ha-ha. But three black spots and brown around his eyes that wait. Everyone’s waiting for the black man. Braxton Counts Virgil’s Colors.

801 Days Without B III, Day 242 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 278 ~Placed For B, Virgil~

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What do you want to be when you grow up? Or who? I wanted to be Dennis Hof, and Braxton would be my Domino. I wouldn’t mind switching places with Johnny Sins. I want to write. Hell! To have a family. But where in this existence… Placed For B, Virgil.

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

Saga 278 ~Placed For B, Virgil~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now. Because I want to build myself a world; belong to one. Or bring my Braxton back.

But there is no place for either one of us here. I found that out yet again yesterday. And all day today, I’ve been losing my effing mind thinking… What happens to Virgil if I leave in one way or another? Speaking of which, I need to set up his vet appointment after counting so much cash. I would have more if my place weren’t in this bedroom. Hell! I should appreciate it, right, Inspector? Again I was terrified today. Effing Day Job. Then again, don’t I belong in Hell? I murdered my son, for starters. (Sigh) Inspector. There’s a word for what I’ve done… euthanasia. A place for my GRIEF, Inspector. Books. And then there’s my FEAR, DEPRESSION, and my endless RAGE. Going nowhere

Monsters live in nightmares, which is why I’m always dreaming. I am an effing monster. But at least that means there’s somewhere to go. There’s nowhere to be, Inspector, as I lied here last night with another foot in my ass again. And yes, Inspector, it was a well-deserved kick, even if I don’t know the circumstances. So, when have I ever been told such? Anyway, I was reading. And the book, like many others, talked about Braxton living within. Fair enough. But I see where his bed has moved. Inspector, his pillow was destroyed. Who’s eating out of his bowls now? And sleeping by my side as he has nowhere to be now? And like Virgil, I find myself placed and displaced. Always, forever

Ask me where I want to be, and the answer is simple. I want to be with Braxton. One more reason I’m mad at Virgil. Not abusive, only angry. And that’s not his fault. More mine for my cowardice that I didn’t join B III when I had the chance. I’m not learning from history. Republican 101. Except I don’t have a chance in Hell. Of sleeping with Stormy Daniels. With the lack of funds, between ensuring Virgil doesn’t suffer, Braxton’s Barks final fate ha. There’s always Akane wa Tsumare Somerareru and Saimin Seishidou, Inspector. Inspector, I could be creating the world of my dreams. Being a family man, an effing pervert, an effing man. Braxton’s Father. Monster, Savage, Human, gone. Placed For B, Virgil

794 Days Without B III, Day 235 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 271 ~One B, Double V~

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Double V victory abroad and at the house. The world kicks my ass daily, but I always return to B III. Now the world continues, and when I get back… Virgil is fighting his loneliness and the little he knows about the world. “One B, Double V”

Wednesday, March 29, 2023

Saga 271 ~One B, Double V~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now. And even being wealthy enough to buy a time machine, I wouldn’t change Braxton’s name. Neo…

Once again, Inspector, you know how I am. When my Humiliations Galore pays a visit… I need my greatest pain. I need to go all Dido “that it’s not so bad. It’s not so bad.” Humiliations Galore are nothing to the simple truth that B, my perfect little boy, died. Only I didn’t know he was/is perfect at the time. If you had asked me, would I rather have a woman or my son… I’d never touch my dick again if you told me I could have my B III. In case you’re wondering why I’m calling you so late. “Don’t worry about a thing. Cause every little thing, gonna be all right,” as the song goes. I was all about Pop Culture yesterday too.

But besides all the Pop and thinking about my cock. Before talking to you, there were “People of Color.” I wonder did I pick that up in “A Black Women’s History of the United States.” Yes, Inspector, I read until I reached 75%. Tomorrow will be 90%, and Friday. But let’s stick with today and the fact that I couldn’t tell you what I retained (sigh). The GOP would be pleased. But still, I want to buy every book on African Americans and dead fur babies I can get my hands on. Even if I don’t remember a damn sentence. That’s the thing, Inspector; I would instead feel good over being smart. The Kindle Challenge? Finishing it is no accomplishment… But to win? Having that?

When I was in junior high. And then high school, there was a neighbor kid across the street, Inspector. He whipped my ass in Mario Kart every day. And do you know what I learned? Second place is okay. Now it’s not, but the fact remains I always settle Inspector. Again I can’t tell you anything about the book I’m reading but having fifteen bookmarks. I don’t want to think about love anymore. But I can do lust all day even if I’m not getting off ever. “I ain’t happy, I’m feeling glad,” like the song says, and I can go and exist as such, I know. But Braxton to Virgil? Neither Virgil nor I want to be second. The fight to be. Him and I? One B, Double V

787 Days Without B III, Day 228 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 264 ~ Virgil’s Escape, Plan B~

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I thought Virgil didn’t have initiative. He’s been sniffing at a gap in the fence after learning to navigate the stairs. I’ve taught him to run away. But for me, welcome to Hell. I know I’m not escaping and even fun things… “Virgil’s Escape, Plan B.”

Wednesday, March 22, 2023

Saga 264 ~ Virgil’s Escape, Plan B~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I can afford to fix the fence. Virgil’s already sniffing around, looking to escape.

But of course, me being the selfish A-hole I am. Let’s talk about me and my plan B as in… Yeah, you guessed it. I want to be with my boy. I should have followed Braxton. Oh, how many days has it been? 780 days and counting, Inspector. All I do is count these days. Effing inventory! But that’s for another time. What was I doing Monday, March 20, 2023; well, after kicking Virgil out for some alone time. No, Echo, not to masturbate, thankfully. Only I did lie in bed naked and thought of something that hadn’t come to mind in so many years. I imagine it was during my religious phase. Or let’s say, um, spiritual… “Astral Projection.” And so I tried it.

I’m going to have to buy some new books on the subject. I’ve forgotten everything. Inspector, how books were once an escape from life. I can’t even do that anymore; reading anything I want? And don’t get me wrong. I’m not hating on current material. Monday, I’m reading “A Black Women’s History of the United States.” Sunday, was “Carry On: Reflections for a New Generation.” Before I read “How to Be an Antiracist” and “Mesmerizing Caroline – The Movie Theater.” Black skin, white titties. And to be honest with you, Inspector Echo, I want to read about more dead fur babies. But that’s not an escape. Is it? Ask me where I want to be; it’s simple. Holding breathing, Braxton. To escape my grief… NEVER.

Hell! I don’t even know where to run to anymore. “Run To You,” right, Inspector? Writing in general. I mean, I hate the Day Job. I wish to honor my son. I need a doctor. What about providing for the freeloader… um, Virgil. Again I also need a new fence. Letting Virgil escape? One way or another, he’ll end up in a box. Right beside my Braxton, won’t V? Funny he sleeps on the left side. So even now, Braxton is there looking over him. I’m not looking at other “boxes,” if you get my meaning. Pornography, effing no. Effing Republican, am I right? Keeping him away from XXX. But the gun’s in the drawer. Hedonism, Sadism, a release, escaping existence. Virgil’s Escape, Plan B.

780 Days Without B III, Day 221 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 257 ~Virgil Bags Braxton’s Time~

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I haven’t cried today. I can’t afford it. But you know how I begin the day. If I had billions, I wouldn’t be doing “that.” The Day Job pay is crap, but I find the time to teach 2V to go down the stairs so he can take one. “Virgil Bags Braxton’s Time”

Wednesday, March 15, 2023

Saga 257 ~Virgil Bags Braxton’s Time~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now. This leaves me more time to cry… or not. I wouldn’t be one for servants. Norman…

You know, the butler from “The Big O” series. If it was between Bruce Wayne’s “Alfred and Roger Smith’s “Norman?” I’d choose Norman, I know. Debates in the shower. Inspector, that’s when I’m not jerking it to Madison Paige. Oh, we’ll get to that soon. Today’s point is Inspector: I can’t stand the pain even though it’s well deserved. Inspector, it’s Times Like These; I want to spill any other fluid. Endure and Survive. Sunday, so the last episode of The Last of Us, which I’ve been thinking about. That and the fact that I like the sound of the rain. Drowning out all the hurt in water, Inspector? One of “my” greatest fears is drowning. (Shudders). I even have a deal with Braxton’s Aunt.

If the end comes by “The Way of Water,” she will fetch me with a boat. How did Noah do it? It wasn’t a boat big enough for all the tears I shed when B died. Have I cried today? I’m sure Braxton’s Aunt has. She and her husband lost their fur baby, Midnight, Inspector. If it’s not grief, then it’s fear. I’m sure I brought up what some reactor said about the three emotions of sadness, fear, and anger. Of everything I have to be scared of today. Cherry wrote a play that shows what a fucked up person I am. Abusive stories Inspector. Only I’m not angry at her at all. If anything, I’m mad at myself for several reasons. Spitting, Sweating, Sick

But as long as V’s ok? He can use the stairs by himself for the most part. V lacks initiative. Well, not when it comes to the gate. He’ll go on the carpet if I leave him on the floor. Inspector, I could kick him out then… back to Braxton’s Room and be alone edging. Which, of course, is how I ended up sick. Thursday, February 16, 2023, The Cherry Collision. Last week I thought I was healing… Inspector, it’s a million times worse now. And now I go back and forth between needing a doctor and saying I got what I effing deserve. Effing dark. Inspector, what becomes of Virgil without me? Braxton? Virgil’s time? Mine? What do I do? Virgil Bags Braxton’s Time

773 Days Without B III, Day 214 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will