Tag: Wrap

Tale 308 ~Don’t B COOL, Virgil~

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Is being into “Pop Culture” cool? My son B was a pretty cool dude. And now. Well, he’s not in the cold, cold, ground… V wasn’t very cool until I cut on the AC. Finally! I was cool enough when my father blamed me for something. “Don’t B COOL, Virgil.”

Saturday, May 4, 2024

Tale 308 ~Don’t B COOL, Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… In my dreams, Lady Lunalesca. The things I could do with ‘cold hard cash.’ But I remain in bed, grappling with the reality of being broke.

“Some of you love sleep more than you love success.” Lady Lunalesca, I love Braxton. Where would I be if I loved everything the way I love my firstborn son? But no. My tears keep me cool, or so I thought. And I’m headed towards the Ninth Circle, regardless, Lu.

Another way I realized or remembered how to be cool… I need only talk to my old man. The fear he instills in me, the fear of being the source of his ire, chills my blood and paralyzes me. Even when I’m not to blame.

Then there’s this morning. Even when I’m not flipping through actual book pages, Lady Luna. I still ended up buying three for twenty-two bucks. And so, what now, dear Lu?

I swear my brain is a block of ice sometimes.

But at least I know what today is. Star Wars Day? WWE Backlash? Braxton’s Aunt’s Birthday! She’s turning thirty-four. To think. I’d miss being that young, with all the possibilities and dreams. But now Lu.

First thing… no, second, maybe third. I missed B III and then had to take Virgil, the other furry kid, outside. Leave it to someone like Kristi Noem to make me want to be better towards V. Kristi, puppy killer!!!

Well, that third thing I was doing this morning was “Turning Japanese…” That’s not cool. I’m sure the critic will say that—if THEY say anything worthwhile. Everything stops when it comes to “Pretty Woman.” And now I’m listening to music, avoiding moaning. Women, mine…

Lunalesca, I’ve been trying to avoid turning on the air conditioner. But yesterday afternoon… SIGH

I tell myself I was trying to take care of Virgil. But I could be trying to adapt to my ‘eternal home.’ First for betraying my boys, then thinking I betrayed my Old Man. Ha!

I was terrified when he called me yesterday about one of my bills. Only an hour later, he called back, saying it was all his fault. During that time, I was unable to move. Frozen.

But the ironic thing is that I wake up wishing I was cooling in the ground every day. I deserve it. Only I would never see Braxton again. And who would look after Virgil, Luna?

Yet I don’t know how the UNDERWORLD works. Then again, Succubus Lord, Backyard Dungeon, Bikini Nights. Don’t B COOL, Virgil

1189 Days Without B III, Day 630 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 301 ~Virgil Storms Braxton’s Gates~

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Will it rain? Am I going to cry about Braxton now? Or will I find some girl to drool over? Or I could work hard and clean up after Virgil. I could cut the grass or fix the fence. Now that’s funny? A storm of activity. “Virgil Storms Braxton’s Gates.”

Saturday, April 27, 2024

Tale 301 ~Virgil Storms Braxton’s Gates~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… How about asking the questions, “How Are You,” How Do You Feel,” or “Are You Alright?”

I’m exhausted right now. I’m not napping now because I want the cappuccino to stay warm—not as cold as my firstborn son. It’s always about Braxton. Here and now.

Yesterday, more like this whole week, has had me contemplating my Braxton’s final breath. It’s cruel that I must use his memory to remind me of this. No matter how bad things get, I’ve survived worse. I’ve seen fire, and I’ve seen rain. But Sunny Days, Lunalesca. Let the storms come. The sound of thunder is nothing to Braxton’s silence.

I had to listen to the third worst thing this universe offers only yesterday. It was my voice while I hid in the office like a pathetic coward on Friday.

The critic keeps telling me I need to be positive. Virgil cries more than me. I swear, one of these days, we might end up drowning each other in tears.

Lunalesca, he doesn’t even sleep in here anymore. I set up the gate and placed his pillow outside in the hall. I don’t know how this all started, but this week has been challenging, Luna.

Again, it has me imagining my son’s last breath and the emptiness that came after. Then there’s the second-worst sound in the world. That’d be my birth, breathing and crying.

Do you understand why I need my music, manuscripts, moans, and meaningless distractions? All as I lay here upon this mattress. In this house, Lunalesca.

And still, I’ll have to go over the gate because Virgil needs something. Being manly… Lunalesca that means I have to be a Dad. Or at least someone who takes care of his responsibilities. Have I looked around the house? The place is falling apart. Money? If I keep behaving as I did yesterday, I won’t have the little bit that I have now, Lunalesca.

All I’m finding is fear. And any forgiveness eludes me. Like a dry spot, Lunalesca. Virgil is going 1 and 2 all over. What am I doing besides cleaning up after him? As for me.

Everyone says, “blood, sweat, and tears.” Not to mention other bodily fluids. Because I can’t keep my pants on, Lunalesca. Being a coward or creep. Raining, pouring, the old man’s snoring. Virgil Storms Braxton’s Gates

1182 Days Without B III, Day 623 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 294 ~Let’s B Civil, Virgil~

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“Never go to war. Especially with yourself.” That’s in Lord of War. Friday, I went to see Civil War. It’s serious when certain people are in the theater freaking out. But aren’t I always? B was/is a good boy. Girls? Green? Let’s B Civil, Virgil.

Saturday, April 20, 2024

Tale 294 ~Let’s B Civil, Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… but that money better be in Canadian dollars. Or Quid or pounds… British money, Lunalesca. Whatever.

My Braxton’s memory is a constant struggle for me. I refuse to let it become a mere memory, to be forgotten or dismissed as one of those ‘it is what it is ‘moments, Lady Luna.

But I didn’t start crying over B today, either. The movie I saw Friday, “Civil War,” did the trick. I swear all the things that I’ve given up. Like writing reviews? But the fear remains.

Sitting in the theater yesterday, I thought about the “deal” I made with these girls. JIC, or Just In Case. That’s from Fear The Walking Dead. Anyway. I told Braxton’s Aunt that if The Dead walked the Earth, I’d save her. If it’s political upheaval, there’s M Anime. In a machine uprising scenario, where’s Cherry?

I told Cherry that? What about the things I told her once upon a time? I’m not a perfect person. I don’t want to be a political one. And when I see myself in the mirror, Lady Lunalesca, Dear God! I am pathetic. And if you hear me moaning over Piper Niven and Onna Kyoushi, particularly Honoka Todo—purple-haired women, I swear, Lady Lunalesca. (Drools).

Can I try to be civil? Show some civility. For once, be a civilian. Just keep it in my pants.

It feels like I’m in a perpetual battle with myself, Lady Lunalesca, and I’m always on the losing side. But when Braxton was here? Yes, it always circles back to my son. My brother-in-arms. That was Braxton. And I rewarded his loyalty… with a box.

The picture of his final moment. There’s a reason I didn’t excel at Journalism, Lunalesca.

That was one more thing I was thinking about while watching “Civil War.” I wanted to be a wartime journalist. Can you imagine that? I don’t remember why that was.

Saturday, April 20, 2024, and I’m one day closer to forty. Now, that is something I know I told Cherry. I don’t want to be forty, but Queen said it best. I sometimes wish I’d never been born at all. But I’m here. And what am I doing while sitting in this bed, Lady Luna?

To look up chicks or keep chatting away. I can play a game or make some green. With my words! Grrr! Let’s B Civil, Virgil

1175 Days Without B III, Day 616 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 287 ~B’s Wrapping Virgil’s Gift~

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The whole armor of God? I’m more the death shroud with my name on it… So the guys at the morgue can identify the body. But my son. He knows what books I’ll identify with. He sends rap when I’m in a “mood.” And helping V? “B’s Wrapping Virgil’s Gift.”

Saturday, April 13, 2024

Tale 287 ~B’s Wrapping Virgil’s Gift~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… That’d make me something more than Disgusting, Depressed, or “Dee, Dee, Dee,” as Carlos Mencia says.

Do I want to begin the day like this? As with most, I didn’t want to start the day. Period. Too bad, I’m reading a book that involves a resurrection… No! Not the Bible, Lunalesca.

Although now that I think about it. Chrissy, ha-ha, “Christ” was resurrected in book three. And here I am in novel five. That is if you want me to feel grateful for anything, dear Lu.

I will be eternally grateful for my son, Braxton. He gave me 15 years of joy and love that I didn’t deserve, Lady Lunalesca. His presence in my life was/is a constant reminder of the beauty and fragility of life. I also need to check Virgil’s vaccinations. He’s not being sick all over the place. How many things am I supposed to show gratitude about on any given day? Hmm.

Resurrection, Rebirth, Realize, B III.

I’ll stick with 3—as in my three lucky numbers… 3, 5, and 15. These numbers hold a special place in my heart, reminding me of the precious 15 years I had with my son, Braxton. I could really use a wish right now, my Lady. But more than wishing to win the lotto, I want my B back. As always, right, dear Lady Lunalesca.

How about wishing for wisdom? Or some woman, excuse me, women, HaremLit. I could wish not to hate a man named Will, who I see in the mirror every morning.

Anyway, let’s stick with wisdom. Whether I meant to or not, I’ve been studying up on resurrection. Take, for example, my last three books. Again, that is my magic number.

Lunalesca, I’m reading an Eric Vall title now. In another book, the protagonist, Darrow, returned from the dead, right… In Outbreak Rising 2, the narrative was chock full of the dead, which made me reflect on the concept of resurrection.

Every morning, I have to wake up and see the world like Joe Stevens, Bingham Madsen, or Ben. I could go on. All told, life is a gift, and the world has a nice little bow. Now, I could be all Tony Montana and talk about wanting the world Lunalesca. But I liked it when I was working towards giving everything to my only son.

But what about Virgil? What about me? Have you seen the world outside, dear Lady? Virgil spends most of his outside time sitting by the stairs, wanting to come inside.

Lunalesca, I would prefer if it was a wrap for me. I stay cold, covered, and cowardly, Lunalesca. That’s a wrap. B’s Wrapping Virgil’s Gift

1168 Days Without B III, Day 609 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will