Episode 067 ~Will A Bit Longer~

WillLeave a comment

I tell you one day I’ll get over this, no not the “The Day” that haunts me as long as I live but getting over being afraid of Pinterest which I should perhaps add to my list of dirty words and not in a fun way. Will A Bit Longer.

Thursday, September 6, 2018

Episode 067 ~Will A Bit Longer~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
Give Me One Reason, other than I haven’t found forever, hell I’m not sure I even want it, again at this stage in the game I only want to be Dennis Hof but still, I am a traditionalist, on the eve of thirty-four and I do want that “nuclear family.” A conversation better suited for the Future Wife but any wife of mine should know what it’s like to have her hands tied up and how I wish I could do the same to Time itself.

“Synchronize your watches.”

“I don’t know how to do that.”

“I don’t have a watch.”

“Time is a construct.” (TAG)

We never know how much time we got right Dirty Diana, and how often do they say live every moment, every breath, hell every word as your last, and we don’t, do we because we’re afraid of being labeled skeevy, perverts, sluts, whores, cum dumpsters *sigh* dirty talk. You can call a girl by her name and be labeled a stalker, a fuckboy, a creeper; focused, that’s my problem, I don’t hide in trash cans, work schedules, addresses, I’m more like, put her in my next book, keep my hands off of her but on pen and paper or my keyboard. I still believe I dug my own grave yesterday telling the truth, hell Alycia, Alicia, Alicia, or Alexa, Alexa, Alexa, one got me into trouble because she’s brunette, the other’s not black enough, another animated, one I wanted to know her name, I’m a fan of Amazon, and the WWE, my sweet buttery Jesus.

Maybe Rumpelstiltskin had the right idea hiding his name, 1984 with Newspeak, Fahrenheit 451 destroying books; women talk about periods, and it scares men to death, “Cherry” fashions herself a modern-day Lolita (she’s 21), Liv Morgan calls herself a juvenile delinquent (WWE), then there’s the whole DDLG/DDMG scene in BDSM. I do much worse Diana, what about the book Ravishment: The Dark Side of Erotic Fantasy by Desmond Ravenstone, a polite way of covering up a certain fantasy am I right; don’t speak it. Le Marquis de Sade didn’t give a fuck, and some call him “the freest spirit who ever existed,” but where did he spend most of his time… one more reason bondage is fascinating, and my cell is one of dotted i’s and crossed t’s just saying.

Sometimes I believe the time is never, to publish my books, to ask questions, to be with someone, as the song goes What’s My Age Again, don’t make me repeat it, so much time and yet to dream of such maddening Power so need I truly Will A Bit Longer.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 066 ~The Will Of Law~

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If you’re reading this, then I’m a paranoid loon, I swear in the era of the #MeToo; when girls want to be pretty but don’t you dare look, when you skip a porno website for Pinterest and feel a million times worse. The Will Of Law.

Wednesday, September 5, 2018

Episode 066 ~The Will Of Law~

Forgive Me Echo,
Give Me One Reason not to get arrested other than the fact that “The Day” is bad enough as is, I’m an adult, and I don’t want to see any new improvements in police vehicles… been there, done that. Somehow or another I needed to make this week worse for myself, but at least I’ll get busted at the house or the library, I couldn’t take it at work, damn this FEAR and damn Pinterest but how shall I explain this time?

Anything I say will be reminiscent of the Harmonic War, haven’t thought about that since forever and every day this week, I’ve thought about the police, perhaps my first sin is that of contemplating suicide, a knife in my neck… the prison system in America, terrifying. My second sin is giving into temptation or again the fear, so much for NO FAP, but if I were sticking to that I wouldn’t have so much anxiety and stress but oh no I have imagination, and that is not a good thing. Okay, so what did I do… *sigh* Fear The Walking Dead, I have a Pinterest board featuring the ladies of the apocalypse, and Alycia Debnam-Carey is one of my favorites.

Season 4 Episode 10 “Close Your Eyes” Alycia stars with the “little bitch” (I didn’t call her that, Skybound reactors did so there) a.k.a. Charlie, Alexa Nisenson so, I’m adding to my board and Alycia gets me in a mood, which leads to “edging” and so I see a Pinterest lookup feature, of course, it looks up Alycia and Alexa. I’m going to look up pictures, this is Pinterest we’re talking about and wham I get hit with one of those warnings that lets you know you’re honestly skeevy, haven’t I spoken about words you can’t use in particular company, and a picture is worth; who knows now just saying.

I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have some fakes of Alycia but this warning freaked me out and despite any picture, no women, no nothing, origami paper shapes I meant to send to “Cherry” since she likes them this warning kept popping up. Now was it a fluke, I’ve had some tech issues lately but how I would want to quit having nightmares of the Catholic Church or Chris Hansen, because of a full grown woman of legal age and a young actress that starred with her seriously.

Alycia Debnam-Carey And Alexa Nisenson

I’ve got about an hour, maybe less if my fear does not take me, my mother has stoked the fires talking about police cars in my neck of the woods, paranoia or the end, I haven’t felt this way since first seeing “Little Lupe” (porn star). Will you forgive me Inspector Echo, for the prospect of death that has both frightened and comforted me these past days; for not sticking to NO FAP; how about for admiring Alycia and wanting to know Charlie’s real name.

Little Lupe And Why I Lost

Last but not least, for rushing back to the house, yes my mother got to me with her report of cops in the area, I even drove by work, checked my emails and my Facebook friends, and a local neighborhood report, I must be crazy but The Will of Law.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 065 ~Will Wait For You~

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Last week I talked about time, and now it’s moving at a snail’s pace, when something you’ve grown to love or even someone makes it clear for one reason or another that, well I don’t know, I feel like I’m on the verge of losing. Will Wait For You

Tuesday, September 4, 2018

Episode 065 ~Will Wait For You~

Dear Future Wife,
Give Me One Reason to wait, other than I needed to read “The Manual: What Women Want and How to Give It to Them” by W. Anton, don’t laugh you’re here now right, and I still consider it my Bible and fourth favorite book. I didn’t wait when the moment finally came to talk to you; I do wonder how many years it took, the breaths, the steps, heartbeats and of course the fear, stupidity for courage, I call it insanity, a whole twenty seconds worth, then:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZmMFIganRQY

Finally, females tend to give males advice that only works for females, such as telling them to take their time, let love come to them, that they will meet someone when they least expect it, and it will “just happen.” But the only reason those things work for females is that they rely on males taking action.” ― W. Anton

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1lX6dEc738w

Even after all this time I’m not sure which scares me more the moment or the wait, glass half full or half empty, I’m more the type there’s something to drink, I wait for you like Schrödinger’s cat sitter. It could be like telling the boss man I’ll think about something and then getting put on the schedule anyway and sometimes it works out, mostly it doesn’t, but I don’t know how to quit you and I never would. It’s not sleeping, and so I clean, I watch YouTube, I write, my Weapon Of Choice for a long night, choose one, not all isn’t that right, then again I multitask.

Sometimes I wait for you as though my little boy has another tick in his ear or he hurt his paw, and I listen to him cry out or look at me when the vet says he stepped on a pinecone wrong. Maybe it’s like when my brakes cut out, and I backed into a tree, and somehow I still got to work, left and made it to the auto shop with six hundred dollars, and the repairs were four hundred. It’s the time between thinking I’m stupid or Pinterest is and forty-eight hours of waiting to lose everything, to know humiliation, the fear of neither taking action or wondering what I’ve done wrong now.

I approached, pursued, won, and now I must improvise, adapt, overcome which takes, thinking and waiting, for what; I love you, I believe in you, and still this life that I lead, what we share together, I feel at any time can be, I don’t know. In the end, though you’re here, everything a man like me could ever want and I Believe love is the answer. If I have learned anything in life, there’s such a thing as love at first sight but even now my love I suppose I Will Wait For You.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 064 ~You Vote With Your Crotch~

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When I was voting for a president that was easy and sad, between blondes and brunettes, kiss or kill, money and everything else, what story I’m going to write next, will I ever get the opportunity at this rate? “Vote With Your Crotch.”

Monday, September 3, 2018

Episode 064 ~You Vote With Your Crotch~

Forty-Eighth Rule Madam Justice

Give Me One Reason, to fight my biology, the Chemical impulses, or the denial of fate, especially at this stage of the game, I haven’t known such fear since hmm… cops burst down my father’s door years ago; I nearly lost my job because of some bitch. How about the first time I saw Little Lupe, I visited Motherless.com, and now Pinterest again, hell if I’m still here Wednesday I might tell you all about it but now Co-Ed Confidential.

“At 4 1/2 months old, a human fetus has a reptile’s tail; a remnant of our evolution. Maybe that’s what I couldn’t escape. You can fight a lot of enemies and survive. But if you fight your biology, you will always lose.” Lord Of War

You’ll have to forgive me if I can’t get the quote word for word but James from Co-Ed Confidential (porn series) talks about how your head can become confused, your gut can do so many things, your heart, how it’s broken but your crotch well… points the way. I didn’t say the right direction but somewhere wanted, hell it’s how you get Trump in the White House, a guy sleeps with pornstars, the Catholic church, and its horrors, and a Pastor gropes Ariana Grande. Meanwhile all day I’ve felt utterly terrified, and it will probably be worse tomorrow, today being a holiday and all, I still remember when I got sent to an “alternative school” for my “wanting” of violence; honestly the lesser of two evils Madam Justice I’m saying.

“I believe in consequences.

No, you believe in guilt.

Maybe. But guilt, before we act, is called morality.” Liberal Arts

What about wrestling, I’ve seen Charlotte Flair naked, but I still root for Becky Lynch for wanting to kick her ass because I believe that’s fair, now why can’t that be the same for other women, for other decisions in my life. Something beautiful can stop a lot of destruction and then again it’s beauty that can cause the same annihilation and then you know what they say about an eye for an eye. Atom Bomb Baby, so if wanting madness and mayhem makes me question Am I A Psycho and a beautiful woman makes me a creeper what else is there? Power for power but what leads to this and that Justice is MONEY.

“An eye for an eye and the world goes blind.”

“In the land of the blind, the one-eyed man is king” (Mixed and different sources)

So if this rule has landed me in such hot water, why don’t I ignore it; because before there was money, when love was not a concept, when feeding your belly and standing tall was all there was, and getting your head caved in well… there was flesh, and that guides everything. Now if I told you that money was all there was for me what would you say, which is worse; the want of death, of life, of all things material, even wanting to be a better man, every single day we vote, how so, Vote With Your Crotch.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 063 ~A Will For Monday~

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Why do we only have the lesser of two evils, in fact, why do I applaud the fact that Monday rolls around and I’ll still be living like this because I know things may get worse, whether I do something or don’t. Not much motivation. “A Will For Monday”

Sunday, September 2, 2018

Episode 063 ~A Will For Monday~

To Will:
Give Me One Reason besides it is your turn, and I’ll tell you, you have a 99.9% guarantee that you will get up, take a shower, get dressed, arrive at work on time, do whatever you have to, return to the house, and walk the little boy. It’s after that when things get iffy though you will speak to Madam Justice. What I’m “trying” to explain is, what if you treated every day like a Monday, or any other day you “MUST” face.

Another reason you’re avoiding the mirror but the nose doesn’t lie, a chat amongst men is only one thing in several you must do today, take a shower, perhaps eat something that doesn’t come out of a box, despite what I went through to get it. How about treating today like you’re writing for NaNoWriMo; nobody is keeping tabs on you, nobody cares, but you have to earn the right to wear that writer’s t-shirt. It seems that today has become all about cleaning, which is why we are talking right now instead of two hours ago, emails, the car, procrastination, or success in progress, how about Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 012 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Failed (Day 003 No Fap)
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
Failed
3. “I Will” Review “The Art Of Peace”
Failed
4. I Will Make It To The Library
Completed
5. I Will Finish “Ven” by Ker Dukey and K. Webster
Failed
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush” (Novel)
Failed

Will you be the one to break this streak of F’s, 17.5 to be exact and thank goodness I somehow found the strength to get off my lazy ass and get to the library right, a day before they started doing maintenance and that’s what you have to do on yourself. When’s the last time there was any good news? Hell, all I can say about last night is I drank hot chocolate instead of stuffing my face with a handful of marshmallows again. It doesn’t end there my friend, looks like you drew the short straw in fifty-two weeks and surviving this well you always do, but it will never get better and given today’s events, Six Impossible Things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The “Father” My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Survive “The Day”
4. I Will Not Get Arrested, Be Not So Fearful
5. I Will Finish “Ven” by Ker Dukey and K. Webster
6. I Will Edit At Least One Chapter of “Apocalypse Rush” (Novel)

Pay particular attention to three and four. How you spend “The Day” I hope, what, that it is better than last year, that everyone forgets it, maybe that it never happened, which brings us to four, you didn’t do anything, and it cost you everything. Why can’t you order yourself to do what is necessary like the seven years wasted at the day job, Throw The Covers, over me because again it is your turn and besides The Day what could be worse than wanting to force the future my friend, A Will For Monday?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6LQQGAd6b2I

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 062 ~A Willing Twenty-Four Hours~

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I should adopt the attitude I once had when I was back in school. When somebody asked how was your day; you say “I don’t want to talk about it” and for once I’ve got nothing to say, but I’m waiting for “The Day.” A Willing Twenty-four Hours

Saturday, September 1, 2018

Episode 062 ~A Willing Twenty-Four Hours~

Hey Lady Lu,
Give Me One Reason not to think about this or that, have you noticed that the more you try to ignore a particular subject, the more it comes up, sort of like air, you don’t think about it, but I’m sure everybody has had a moment where they needed to catch it. If they didn’t, are they living or surviving, though for me it usually comes as a moment of anxiety, how I *sigh* plenty in my writing and I saw something pretty interesting on Instagram today.

Today, I’m more awake and not surprisingly lazier but “trying” not to think about things such as porn, takes plenty out of me but I haven’t taken any naps…am I coming out of my Depression maybe? Why Depression, well we’ll get to that but my little boy is a pain, and it’s hard to stay mad at him, I’m so used to having him around and then to send him away to time out, hurts me more than you, no my “father” found joy in my pain. Speaking of pain I’ve also gotten into buying more books, should I be thinking about how much I failed this week, including reading and I don’t have to, if I knuckle down and get to work right now…

Yeah, the story of my life which leads me to the huge thing I don’t want to think about that starts with the letter D, no not that, and yeah Depression but “The Day” is coming up soon, the worse day of my life. Tell me Lady Luna what could be worse than that, DEATH ha when you think of the odds of any one human being and no I am not a man of faith but neither am I a man of science or anything. Yes, I know words, and that’s what my life should be, hell what my life is; not that they have brought me any such thing as I look over my keywords for twenty-four hours.

One more failure as I didn’t hide ‘the Day” from people deep enough and now I have to look forward to disappointment, disgust, Dad and plenty more D words except the one that’s driving me crazy. Didn’t do me any favors in high school and I had so many names that Willie was only one more, and here I am, one more day down, closer to “The Day” and my Lady Lu how I have wasted A Willing Twenty-four Hours.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 061 ~Gives Me The Willies~

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Writing has a way of revealing secrets, why don’t I do it more often then, maybe because some secrets should remain under the covers like me, but I decided to get up and live the dream perhaps the nightmare. “Gives Me The Willies”

Friday, August 31, 2018

Episode 061 ~Gives Me The Willies~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Give Me One Reason, not to be scared of horror movies, and I’ll merely say Take A Look At My Life, a testament to The Walking Dead and yeah maybe you’ll say I’m only lazy, there’s no denying that. I’ve been thinking a lot about these people at the day job, celebrating fifteen years on the job, I’m on seven myself and if I should ever make it to fifteen years in retail, do you know what I would want Sophia honestly?

“Hey, sweetheart. Let me tell you something. You, uh, you have my permission. I ever turn into one of those things? Do me a favor, blow my fucking head off.” ― Dawn of the Dead

Does that sound somewhat harsh to you, yesterday to me is not a tale worth retelling, but I’m going to make a real journal entry for once and tell you about today; I woke up about 6:30 am, and my little boy wanted his walk, but daddy was busy playing The Walking Dead. While outside a young girl said “oh no” which is standard for any of the female species upon seeing me, her mother overheard which got her to bring their dog in that’s always running around. Climbed back into bed to continue my Walking Dead session and then broke my No Fap streak again in less than twenty-four hours, I’m not proud of it or what got me off, damn these Beautiful Girls.

“For no particular reason I just kept on going. I ran clear to the ocean. And when I got there, I figured, since I’d gone this far, I might as well turn around, just keep on going. When I got to another ocean, I figured, since I’d gone this far, I might as well just turn back, keep right on going.” ― Forrest Gump (1994)

Woke up so my kid could answer nature’s call and as I told Indiana Gone, I went all “Forrest Gump” since I’d gone this far, I might as well eat breakfast, put on pants, fix another bowl, wash dishes, make the bed, even talk to you. You know something Lady Sophia, I’ve had an epiphany, maybe that’s why dogs are blessed with four legs because today he needed to be the man and I’m no more than an animal, so he loaned me legs. Speaking of being an animal my second epiphany or more an understanding from The Walking Dead or maybe Detroit: Become Human, a bit of both, I haven’t earned the right to be alive Lady Sophia, I live vicariously through the books I read and write, movies, music, games because when I walk outside the thing is:

“But he got real quiet. He said he was dead the minute he stepped in to enemy territory. Every day he woke up and told himself, rest in peace. Now get up and go to war. And then after a few years of pretending he was dead… he made it out alive. That’s the trick of it, I think. We do what we need to do and then, we get to live. But no matter what we find in DC, I know we’ll be okay. Because this is how we survive. We tell ourselves… that we are the walking dead.” ― The Walking Dead 05X10

That’s why I hate “The Day” life to me was never a gift and when two people who gave it regret it why shouldn’t I, sure people at work laugh, people around town too. I give people stuff to do, but if I didn’t exist, people would rest in peace, hell so would I. I don’t have to fear the monsters dear Lady Sophia. I can write to my heart’s content. This life is much scarier. And sitting here another day, going out, almost thirty-four years dodging the box my friend Gives Me The Willies.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 060 ~Will Said Or Not~

WillLeave a comment

Silence is golden, and unfortunately, I gave it all up to run errands and to talk about other people shutting up which is probably the least offensive thing that I will say today and if only I sounded less stupid. Will Said Or Not

Thursday, August 30, 2018

Episode 060 ~Will Said Or Not~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
Give Me One Reason not to tell someone to shut up, other than the fact that I like blowjobs, trust me on this, a girl said once if I made her pasta I would get one and while I declined *cue shock* I still wanted the option. I like screams, moans, cries and whimpers, my name on her lips or nasty endearments (Ravishment Fantasy?) with all the noise in this world I like my girls loud.

Then there are days like today when I want everything and everyone to shut up, and if she isn’t gagging on something of mine, then a scarf, any number of tools, hell her panties stuffed in her mouth can help. Maybe I should practice what I preach, especially if I’m not going to talk about my anxiety driving me crazy today but my mind is clear, unfortunately, along with another part of my anatomy, the stress too much but that’s a fucking excuse. So if I don’t want to give explanations, what about the other things we don’t say, I can go forever and a day about the things people think I say, the things I do and don’t, what I mean and what’s fantasy.

Maybe that’s why I have this gagging concept along with some exhibitionism… people but not yet entirely though I’m working up to that, more the idea of a girl being unable to say anything but being watched on camera. I’ve had a thing for photography and portraits lately and watching these girls, not professional models but with such perceptiveness, poise, purity, I’m between Great Teacher Onizuka and Brutal Castings. Of course, I can’t say that stuff out loud; I’m even hesitant to mention it here, though I sent in the money to save the blog but do I honestly want anyone to read it… like me, people will focus on the blowjobs and ignore everything else that I’ve said right?

Hell Dirty Diana I say it time and time again, if I can’t handle this simple stuff what will happen when I’m Christian Grey, Dennis Hof or a man in Hollywood, role models right, the president sleeps with porn stars and wants a space army, no wonder he wants everyone to shut up. I think I’m a great listener Dirty Diana, but today I’m not looking for answers, I’m not looking for advice, not even Poor Sweet Baby, I only want quiet and release and here I am regretting having it, Will Said Or Not.

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 059 ~Iron Today, Will Tomorrow~

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My head is made of stone today, and I wish I were a Tin Man because my flesh is killing me, after all, it is stronger than steel as was said in “Conan The Barbarian,” but everything feels so damn hard at the moment. “Iron Today, Will Tomorrow” *sigh*

Wednesday, August 29, 2018

Episode 059 ~Iron Today, Will Tomorrow~

Forgive Me Echo,
Give Me One Reason to stop, other than the fact that it’s “set in stone,” but that’s the Internet for you, and wasn’t I lucky that it was in its infancy when I was in high school; yeah my age is both a crime and punishment. Talk about throwing dirt on my name, but will they remember me someday, what for I ask, well Inspector Echo, this covers a wide arrange of sins, probably more suited for Dirty Diana so I will tone it down today, hopefully.

I am not the man of steel, goes without saying, especially over the last few minutes… what I mean is I’m not the hero, I’m not exactly the villain either, or at least I hope not, but I’m not “made of stone.” Iron Will, an elemental metal, yes I spent most of my workday imagining different metals and stones; when you’re introducing yourself, well Will a.k.a. Iron Will, a.k.a. I Go Hard, and there we go back into that “adult situations” state of mind. Sex and violence, you see my writing takes care of my violent tendencies, for the most part, and the sex somewhat but I also want to own a brothel someday too.

Silence is golden, am I right but is that a sin, admitting a life goal, I want a lot in this world, and I want to say I’m going to earn it but I didn’t go to the library today to write and will I be working on my novel today? All that glitters is not gold, and that can be both a good thing and a bad thing, but as I often hear in my motivations, it’s good to be a dreamer but better to be a planner and a worker and I’m dreaming a lot lately. Too bad I’m awake when I do and when I’m in bed *sigh* it’s hard but I’m on Day 15 though I’m edging like crazy for sure.

Diamonds are forever, and that is what I need to be doing, pressure and time that’s what it takes with coal but how can I when I’m on fire, and I feel like at any moment there will be nothing left of me? Will you forgive me Inspector Echo for being so random today, for the sins I know that will remain and for attempting to dig myself up from beneath the stone, for being a “basic bro,” for wanting that Midas Touch, and for not appreciating what I am for the moment because I know, Iron Today, Will Tomorrow.

“The riddle… of steel.”

“Yes! You know what it is, don’t you boy? Shall I tell you? It’s the least I can do. Steel isn’t strong, boy, flesh is stronger! Look around you. There, on the rocks; a beautiful girl.” ― Conan the Barbarian (1982)

I Will Have No Fear

Episode 058 ~The Time Traveler’s Will~

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If only I were in such a rush for love as I am to panic about everything, today it was my computer and then my four-legged son just waiting around for his daddy to be happy, but he wants a mom too. “The Time Traveler’s Will.”

Tuesday, August 28, 2018

Episode 058 ~The Time Traveler’s Will~

Dear Future Wife,
Give Me One Reason because you know I can’t stand being late; sadly this is one of those times you wish I’d look at my phone because my watch tends to run pretty fast and that’s the time I do abide. I hate numbers but I love you, and this is only one more reason why, because you stop time or at least disrupt it; since when did you become The Time Traveler’s Wife, I suppose that’s a day I shouldn’t forget after all it’s our Anniversary.

Is it; as if I need one more thing to panic about today with everything but how do you do that to my heart, you make it skip a beat, you rev it up, and then there is this peace that settles over me. When we first met, I was frozen and then came the Slow Motion the way I was looking at you and how my feet were cinderblocks and then rushing for dates, The Flash when it came to wanting to spend my life with you and even faster chasing the kids. My words, where you once left me breathless and then What’s My Age Again, am I a schoolboy or an old man having a Senior moment, or maybe I should ask your age once more I swear You’re Timeless To Me.

Like my phone right, keeping up with the appointments, the playlist, There Goes My Baby, of course, I have so many pictures of you frozen in time is it any wonder that I’m in a rush to find my way back to you? You know my theory that the world will end in five minutes and with you, it’s as if I have already found my way to paradise and I don’t have to worry about anything. Back then I prayed for twenty seconds… what I needed the courage and five seconds earlier that day to get out of bed and the man I was before all of this Love?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZmMFIganRQY

He and every other evolution of myself promised you forever, and that is a promise I intend on keeping, and of course, I don’t need any watch for that, I have the home we built together, my dog who has probably been waiting longer to make sure I would be okay. Isn’t that what I said once upon a time, I’m okay but with you, who I am, The Way I Am, baby girl I could never imagine there would come a time that I would be… happy, so Close Your Eyes and Wander because it’s The Time Traveler’s Will.

I Will Have No Fear