Lesson 338 ~Pour The Bisquick, Expect Pancakes~

Abraham Ford, now there was a good man and Rick Grimes who was the father in The Walking Dead, and its hero; well, I guess we all have to grow up sometime and start making breakfast for ourselves. Pour The Bisquick, Expect Pancakes and make them good

Monday, June 4, 2018

Lesson 338 ~Pour The Bisquick, Expect Pancakes~

Thirty-Fifth Rule Madam Justice

Can You Love Me Again, considering this will be somewhat of a repeated lesson, Rule Fifteen, Lesson 198 “I Take My Own Lumps” but this is more about responsibility in both failures and with success? Also, you’ve heard me tell this story before “I love my dog like pancakes” first because he ate my waffles, French Toast, whatever so Pancakes is what I have left, secondly he’s my son, and I couldn’t love him more if I “poured the Bisquick” to make him, I’m Dad.

This rule is a reminder that if you do something you must accept the consequences both good and evil and you deal; being an African-American man I’ve heard more than my fair share of absent father rhetoric. My father, other than from a financial standpoint wasn’t one for affection, other than cheating on my mom but that’s another story, the thing is even when cheating, my half-brother, myself, my sister and discovered half-brother were taken care of honestly. Every action we take, like “Detroit: Become Human” you knew that was coming right, reshapes the world and our destiny and if you perform a particular action you must expect or at least be prepared for the repercussions of such a performance.

One thing I can’t tolerate is evil that refuses to acknowledge itself; they say true evil believes that it’s doing good and I agree somewhat but then I look at Trump and his peons and I mean if you’re going to be racists well go ahead but don’t try to hide it. You see Bisquick can make other things besides pancakes and even if you’re hoping for pancakes they could still be god awful. I’m reminded some of “World War Z” not sure if this is a rule, but it will be “Remember, Be The 10th Man” you know The Tenth Man Rule, how you must expect the unexpected if only life was so exciting.

However, if you have sex with a woman, you either make a baby, or you don’t, of course, you can take precautions, but things have that 99% guarantee for a reason, like believing in God in case there is a Heaven. When it comes to my dog though, I adored him the moment I saw the ball of fluff, and I will love and protect him until the end Justice.

I’m a man; my father might not have been a great one, good, alright, whatever but he looks after his responsibilities, and I will; as well when it comes to my life if you smell what The Will is cooking… Pour The Bisquick, Expect Pancakes.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 337 ~Fire Those Evolving Desire~

Fire burns and you need more to keep it going, more trends, beauty, and hours in the day and still I waste so many already and am I getting any closer to what is fact, my final state of happiness maybe. Fire Those Evolving Desire.

Sunday, June 3, 2018

Lesson 337 ~Fire Those Evolving Desire~

To Will:
Can You Love Me Again, that little boy that thought Two Hundred dollars would fix everything and now you have more than you could have dreamed of and I know you’re not happy? Evolution, yeah you can’t put all of this on the brain, considering last night, you feel such disappointment, a second wet dream in eighty-five days of “No FAP” at least this time you remember the vision; if people only knew.

Speaking of what set you off and what people know, while this may be more of a conversation for “Dirty Diana” I was sure it would have been someone from “Detroit: Become Human” either Chloe, Kara, or North but no, however choking was involved… not penis wise otherwise, reset the clock. Your writing is going slower but progressing, finding out you want something definitely helps a bit but so many responsibilities, help the girl, make more money, write which is what you want to do and who knows. It always starts with a goal but that success is becoming like your fad, once upon a time it was “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles” TMNT, mom killed that one but what about those six impossible things hmm:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 78* No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Completed? (Day 85** No Fap) Two Wet Dreams In 85 Days
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
Completed
3. I Will Edit Five Chapters At Least Of My Novel
Failed, Two Edited
4. I Will Complete Whispers In The Dark
Completed
5. I Will Post A Review For “The Maiden” by Celia Aaron
Failed
6. I Will Edit One Hundred Poems (Book)
Failed, 47 Poems

As much as you contradict yourself, some things won’t know denial, for example, “Chloe” but I ended up dreaming about Maggie from “The Walking Dead because brunettes can’t be denied and once upon a time it was Asian girls. You want friends, but those people are stopping you from working, you even had to cut the phone off today; you want to listen, but you want to rest, you want to fight, but you shy away from conflict. Desire is desire, but you should pick one; tried that after “The Hunger Games” came out, then there was “Divergent,” “Article 5,” “The 5th Wave,” “Beyond Series,” “Fever Series,” six impossible things:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 85** No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Edit Five Chapters At Least Of My Novel
4. I Will Complete 50% Of The Prophet By Celia Aaron
5. I Will Post A Review For “The Maiden” By Celia Aaron
6. I Will Edit One Hundred Poems “The Bedroom Soapbox”

If anything, it’s excellent to want a world where nothing is beyond desire, and I say that because I will have it all one day, symbolic rapper logic, idolizing Scarface and all but should you focus more on what you don’t want maybe. You know that you don’t wish for the day job forever that’s for damn sure, you don’t want to stick to a schedule and have the luxury to enjoy life, reading is good but even if you got a PS4, Detroit Become Human, when would you play?

You can’t afford to go burning money, not anymore, and with less than a month to go on this blog seriously Fire Those Evolving Desire.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 336 ~Today’s Word Is ‘ Discombobulated’~

Is there a more confusing word than love, trust me other than taking care of the dog I have only known confusion, beginning and endings, and a desire to play one video game if you’re keeping track. Today’s word Is Discombobulated.

Saturday, June 2, 2018

Lesson 336 ~Today’s Word Is ‘ Discombobulated’~

Hey Lady Lu,
Can You Love Me Again, hell that’s all you’ve been doing, you and your friends, since I got back into writing, maybe I should ask can I love you again and even now that word escapes me. Less than a month to see and I ask myself have I found any new loves, do I feel any better? I know I’ve had some good days, but I still feel so out of it lately, and of course, I should, work nearly killed me or dare I say, people, real and fiction.

Being torn apart by two worlds, what other word is there but Discombobulated, disconnected, unbalanced, thrown into confusion, perhaps fear gets a bad rap because I can always point out what makes me afraid. Nowadays when I’m not wasting time, I’m like MacGregor on the Colony, creating conspiracy after conspiracy some right on the money, others downright idiotic. Maybe I am going crazy or crazier, still making moves on one woman, while getting made fun of by some girl, and even thinking I’m living with a poltergeist, with a taste for Mr. Goodbars and Pop Tarts, amongst other things honestly.

I can’t get “Detroit: Become Human” off of the brain, I know I’ve probably failed most of my six impossible things, and at this rate, I won’t be getting paid the week after next, my damn day job. It could all be stress, and the method I usually employ to alleviate that stress is off-limits and would leave me depressed anyway, another two words, being pent up wanting to do something and then again wanting to climb into my bed, Bipolar. A part of me wants to dive into “The Art Of Peace,” but I have more stuff to read that isn’t helping the whole hiatus I have going on, but sex is everywhere Luna.

Even your name I think I should change to “Chloe”… Detroit: Become Human but then what happens when the next craze comes into play and you know there is always something else on the horizon, I can barely keep up. One of the reasons I like the rain except driving in it, the rain makes everything slow down, tears, hot showers, stopping pretty girls from leaving, you catch my meaning.

I’m more of a fire person, or I like to think so and didn’t I say I miss the anger, I miss the sex, and I miss being able to keep the house at a reasonable temperature. Machines, my mind, *sigh* “Today’s Word Is ‘Discombobulated.’”

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 335 ~A Little Write Longer~

Hold on just a little while longer; I told myself that at work, riding through today’s storm, and nearly every single day when it comes to waking up and I believe everything will be alight and why is that? “A Little Write Longer.”

Friday, June 1, 2018

Lesson 335 ~A Little Write Longer~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Can You Love Me Again, did you ever stop, and you’re only holding on for hope in something, so close to letting go but you just can’t because for some reason you believe everything will be alright? How many times this week have I mentioned “Detroit: Become Human,” and one of the things bugging me is “The End,” “And They Live Happily Ever After” or even if they don’t this story has torn me apart Lady Sophia.

What does that say about my writing, is that why I’m feeling so depressed besides witnessing the end of a great story, it’s like going to the movies without reading the book but in this instance the film is glorious, the game itself might destroy me. So many endings Lady Sophia but I’m trying to abstain, and then again I think about the end of my book. I read somewhere that the key to a protagonist is figuring out what they want and making sure they never get it; my main character gets plenty of sex but what about this thing they call love honestly?

“There are two types of tragedies in life. One is not getting what you want; the other is getting it.” Yuri Orlov, Lord Of War

I know I’m always repeating myself but what did I say about my habit of writing the problem over and over, hoping that the answer will someday come to me and even if it did what’s next. If I fail, if I succeed, at least I’ll live as I believe, Whitney Houston sang that but I’m not living at all, too afraid of both outcomes and that’s why I keep writing as if I indeed have much more to say. Stupid how I struggle for the words then and I don’t think they’re missing it’s only the fact that I want so much that The End is impossible and when it comes, well here’s today.

“I wanna stay inside all day
I want the world to go away
I want blood, guts and chocolate cake
I wanna be a real fake.”
Marina & The Diamonds

We’re not immortal Lady Sophia, them again “Don’t Fear The Reaper” instead he fears me but today how many times have I listened to this song. It’s like my new “Easy Street,” and the street is far from easy, passed right by the post office, got caught in a storm, etc. No one knows the future, only one more reason to be a writer, one more reason to live a thousand lives through art because this one life I know I have is going nowhere fast, but I’m moving forward aren’t I or I was.

So I’ll hold on just a little while longer, tomorrow hopefully will be a productive day but who knows the future, that would be writers, but frankly I’m tired and still, A Little Write Longer.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 334 ~Just A Love Machine~

Brothels are targets and others who work in the legal sex industry by the government, but boys must have their toys, and for once I don’t mean guns. Personally, I would settle for a PS4 and a copy of Detroit: Become Human. “Just A Love Machine?”

Thursday, May 31, 2018

Lesson 334 ~Just A Love Machine~

WARNING, 18+, READER DISCRETION ADVISED

Come In Dirty Diana,
Can You Love Me Again, wait why am I asking, because that’s what you do right, then again you don’t ask to kiss the girl, to make love, or hell to fall in love, no wonder men and women are in serious trouble. We’ve forgotten what it means to have simple relationships, where every word can get you into trouble, the idea that we analyze and scrutinize everything, that some resort to crime because what is love and sex is mechanics.

If you’ve been listening to me these last few days, you know I have become “obsessed” yes, that’s the word some use with me but what about the new game “Detroit: Become Human” or more to the point the characters Kara, North, and Chloe. Stupid I suppose how often I fall for characters but what about real women, I wouldn’t call myself a love machine but more a laugh factory and don’t we laugh at those guys who buy “Real Dolls” yeah and I spent a year writing to Abyss Creations. You see the internet is full of companies advertising fake girlfriends, bots all over the place, and what is a dominant but someone who falls but for a submissive and uses those traits to serve themselves and the relationship?

Where would I even begin designing the perfect lover though I’m sure a few girls know my tastes and give it another year or so and there will be robotic lovers, and this is the way the world ends. Now I could tell you all about the sex, check the warning but it happens you know, a guy not being in the mood, I suppose we are the sum of our parts, the penis one way, my heart breaking, my mind angry, and most of it over a video game. I’d say I wish I was a machine and with my whole “No Fap” policy I feel like I want to explode but if I leak anything, it will be tears, sweat, or blood, not that I’m into that type of play to be sure.

Machines have been letting me down lately or more like the people who write shows since I’m only talking about TV and I didn’t have to watch that walkthrough, but I was hooked you know. I know what humans are capable of and here we are, as we created God in our image so too we develop machines, to do things that humans are having a hard time with; yes sex is one thing but *sigh* Just A Love Machine?

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 333 ~The Stench Of Defeat~

Can you smell what the Will is cooking, despite one good endorsement everything else around here stinks to high Heaven, or maybe that’s me, working too hard or scared of looking like I’m hardly working? “The Stench Of Defeat”

Wednesday, May 30, 2018

Lesson 333 ~The Stench Of Defeat~

Forgive Me Echo,
Can You Love Me Again, even when I can’t smell what The Rock is cooking, maybe when all there is to breathe is more shrimp or microwave dinners. I’ve never thought to turn the oven on since being here. How about the stress sweat but I’m too lazy to go looking for the commercial, I should probably go and take a shower if I wasn’t nearly drowning already with so many waves.

What about so many smells; it took me forever to get out of the scent of gummy bears I ripped into after work; my cooking range is limited enough, but today, I’ve only had barbecue chips and candy. Speaking of limited time, how about all that time spent tagging clothes at work today, when everybody looks at you as a failure, when you try to help a coworker, and you overstay your welcome, not to mention good ole S.A.D. It doesn’t help matters any that as hot as it is, I’m wearing my security blanket, my hoody for most of the day, you know right?

Cleanliness is next to godliness they say, but I’m just a man, and if anything, men do stupid things, I got a bit into “Manscaping” all because of women, and at this rate, it doesn’t matter, to be honest. Hell Inspector Echo how long did I go without a shower during all my days of writing oh yeah and spoiling myself watching a walkthrough of “Detroit: Become Human,” I’m addicted, but that’s only making me work harder on my writing isn’t it? Yes, that’s what I’m doing, I’m spoiling because if you’re not living you’re dying and either way it goes all I want to do is cover myself in something dirty and some green.

Preferably I would instead go with cremation but when it comes to dirt, the muck and the mire, something that straight up stinks, it’s the ideas that come into my mind, and that’s not stopping anytime soon. What about the elephant in the room, I’m the shit, or I should believe that because this is the only way anything is going to get done; with as messy as I am now all I want to do is sleep in my cool “clean” bed just saying.

I’m sorry Inspector Echo, will you forgive me for stinking up the joint, for being too hot under the collar and in my pants, for neglecting myself in this and for the dirty mind that keeps me sane, ooh that smell The Stench Of Defeat.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 332 ~Bend The Knee Will~

Still struggling with my phone, all the girls text me nowadays, and that beats all the news that you can’t avoid these days and there wouldn’t be if people were allowed to take a knee, kneel to whoever or agree to love one another. Bend The Knee Will

Tuesday, May 29, 2018

Lesson 332 ~Bend The Knee Will~

Dear Future Wife,
Can You Love Me Again, you know how I feel about God, but here I am wondering “How Do You Talk To An Angel” without my phone that is, hell more “like Cleopatra, Joan of Arc, or Aphrodite” right? We fall in love, we can’t help ourselves because sometimes love is sick, it can be Heavy In Your Arms, and perhaps you’ll kick it under the couch, yeah aren’t we all fond of our phones my love.

There is nothing wrong with a man kneeling when he plays with his children, to think my “father” always spoke about my hair as a mess because I would be on the floor playing, that man knows nothing about affection. What about my first born, my little four- legged son is so short but I’m always talking to him, letting him climb in my lap, feeding him, and he’s not getting any younger. Neither am I; you can hear the crick in my knees, a man takes care of his family, and that doesn’t mean only financial obligations baby girl.

Then again I want that phone back, boys and their toys right, but there is a time to stand and didn’t I, right beside you, and ever since then, by your side, back to back, again I’m not one for God, but you’re my rib.

I have a spine to say I will kneel with those players who are protesting the injustices of this country and I will stand against those who wish nothing more than to destroy the ideals of our home; another thing to love about you and why I love us. This love I have for you, for all our children, for the place that we call home; if they don’t let people kneel quietly in protest we may be in for a world of trouble indeed.

There is many a reason to kneel, and you might have been the greatest one of all, the Greatest Love Of All, The Sweetest Taboo, and look who found their phone, and you’re mad but “Ain’t Too Proud To Beg.”

So “Love Lift Us Up Where We Belong” or maybe I should be running, I have to stay in shape a bit, but we’re still not becoming some football watching family despite how I support their reason to protest. Now the kids are calling for their rendition of “Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes” so guess I’ll “Bend The Knee Will.”

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 331 ~If It Exists, There’s Porn~

I won’t take credit for this rule or a lot of them to be sure, but this one is a fundamental concept when it comes to being online, and at least I know the law, the rules unlike some in our government. “If It Exists, There’s Porn”

Monday, May 28, 2018

Lesson 331 ~If It Exists, There’s Porn~

Thirty-Fourth Rule Madam Justice

Can You Love Me Again, even as I sit here and reiterate one of the fundamental rules that guide the Internet; I can only still estimate what brought about my fear, but my introduction to this concept was “Tenchi Muyo!” and movie channels.

One can only imagine who came up with this rule, indeed how do I come up with mine Two Hundred And Forty-Six and you know the plan is Three Hundred And Sixty-Five but this single rule governs many men. You know I have been working on my poetry compilation and every girl who made that list some time ago has porn online albeit a few fakes, but you would think that some of the actresses would crack down on this maybe. I’ve seen designers upset that game girls are used in such ways but again nobody honestly stops it and with how the government has been cracking down on escorts and brothels recently… does that offend you more than dead children, hell nearly everybody nowadays.

We are all trying to live in a fantasy because the real world; I don’t know anymore but I’ll admit, I’m a slave to it myself. Here I haven’t watched one episode of “Game Of Thrones,” but I have at least three actresses in what “Cherry” calls my spank bank, Pinterest. Before you shoot me; a dirty look, check out all the girls, cosplayers, “Killer And A Sweet Thang” anime, movies, Cherry herself. I’ve even had a mom send me a naked picture, any woman that says she doesn’t want someone to find her attractive physically is a liar but “#metoo.” If I told you half the things I’ve looked up from Sunday to now, my what you would think, the lesser being those girls from “Detroit: Become Human” Kara and North, coming soon possibly.

Maybe the real world has become nothing more than one big porno or at least a strip club and like everything else we want to record it, HD, CG, 3D, hell IMAX and if it’s between sex and death I will choose the former. In both, the stakes keep getting bigger though because nobody wants the rule of law, the rules, and you know what kind of guy I am Madam Justice, people make me worse because I don’t hide but I should I think.

Sometimes at least and I take my sickest, vilest, most depraved and perverted desires and lock them away but if you ask me I’m an open book, free and open Internet for everybody but still If It Exists, There’s Porn.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 330 ~Say Another Perfect Day~

I suppose if there is a God, that my life would be one of those running gags in some decent sitcom, looking at you HIMYM, your ending sucks but I reached The End a long time ago and now one more day of editing. Say Another Perfect Day.

Sunday, May 27, 2018

Lesson 330 ~Say Another Perfect Day~

To Will:
Can You Love Me Again, how about a month from now, more like Thirty-Five days but who’s counting and who wants to “score,” still hating math with a fiery passion aren’t you? If you can’t love future you, we know past you is out of the question but I am proud you’re working on your poetry again. Less adoration more sex but what has love ever gotten you, a bank account, a doggie, two or three girls that don’t want you to die, are you thinking positive yet?

You know the future doesn’t always have to be a negative concept and of course, the worse day of your life will be here sooner than you think and there will be another NaNoWriMo run in July. How about how this week is already beginning to look, you need the money and any day where you don’t have to wake up and to get it counts as a plus strangely enough. Could this No Fap be paying off, speaking of paying off what about those famed Six Impossible Things hmm:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 71* No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
Completed (Day 78* No Fap)
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
Completed
3. I Will Edit At Least Four Chapters Of My Novel
Partial Completion, Didn’t Read Out Loud And No Chapter Titles Yet
4. I Will Complete 50% Of Whispers In The Dark
Completed 93%
5. I Will Post A Review For Avengers: Infinity War
Completed
6. I Will Edit Sixty-Five Poems (Poetry Book)
Failed Processing The First Fifteen

Now I saw this question in “36 Questions To Fall In Love,” what would constitute a “perfect” day for you. While I’m sure I’ll have a better answer when I finally have a girl on my couch; I was only having a conversation with a friend, not in that way. You know the world would consider you effeminate for thinking about your wedding day, but can you even remember having a truly blessed day and not how Christians define it. For now this day is far from perfect but finally getting a book published, being able to afford everything on your new wish list. How about this longing because as great as you’ve been doing with No Fap you nearly blew your load to Angie Griffin, “Okay” or Reagan Kathryn almost last night remember that?

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants (Day 78* No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Be The Friend My Dog Deserves
3. I Will Edit Five Chapters At Least Of My Novel
4. I Will Complete Whispers In The Dark
5. I Will Post A Review For “The Maiden” by Celia Aaron
6. I Will Edit One Hundred Poems (Book)

Perhaps you are setting your hopes too high, but we’ve discovered that having a list of goals does help, though that last review didn’t come so easy, and that might be another perfect day idea, when you don’t have to make excuses, this is fun right? I’ve seen “Better Days,” okay I couldn’t say that with a straight face but I always believe that you will and yet we understand the world will end any day now, so weird right?

Weird, beautiful, freaking crazy, these days can be a whole lot, but for now, your job is as the song goes Say Another Perfect Day.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 329 ~Let’s See What Sticks~

Nothing brings humanity together like destruction and doing it alone is almost a criminal act but why not keep it all to myself; well, I have a blog and no published works, I’m sure people will find something else. Let’s See What Sticks now

Saturday, May 26, 2018

Lesson 329 ~Let’s See What Sticks~

Hey Lady Lu,
Can You Love Me Again, even with as dirty as that sounds or maybe that’s just me and my filthy mind? You know everything continues to pile up, albeit in smaller amounts but still. It sticks with you like my feet to the ground; how long does it take to learn how to walk and here I have to remind myself always to pick up my feet, to lift up my head, shoulders back. My “father” says I look weird; he would prefer I keep my eyes on the ground, a reminder.

I’ve talked often enough about how I’m not growing any taller because I can’t afford it, and how I feel so heavy because of everything that I’m keeping inside, like a reverse Pandora’s Box because Hope fled some time ago. It’s like “Pour Some Sugar on Me” already, maybe I’m not procrastinating but I need to find some joy in my life and even when I’m not watching the world go to Hell, what about all these created worlds. Watching “Detroit: Become Human,” reading “Whispers In The Dark” by LeTeisha Newton or even reading my works is doing nothing to make me feel better but these are things that stick.

Did I ever mention how much I hate glitter, and that sticks to everything, I wonder can fire burn that away; maybe that’s it Lady Luna, that I miss the anger, but it’s always there against myself, even at this moment. Everything I’m doing to stay awake, and when I do, I can’t stick to my task because when I think about what I want to do, you know honestly the world doesn’t need that from me or anyone else. Another reason to keep my head down, while possibly staying alive, you don’t want to know what the world has to offer because what do I do, take it, steal it, pay for it, and only, so I want more?

Again with my sugar diet, donuts and chocolate, quick meals not to live but to waste more time, wasn’t I suppose to have my poetry book ready to go this month and I can’t get past the first girl, a hundred poems out of how many? To make yet another pop culture reference yeah right, Fahrenheit 451, we are burning everything, and the sad thing is when we run out then the fire dies and bring on the darkness but then you can’t read the writing on the wall right?

That’s what I want Luna, maybe that’s why I relish sex, the feel of traditional books, when’s the last time I bought one of those, I want actual game discs, I keep my dog close, him and all his fur. I want to remember what it is to feel as the fire dies away, Lady Luna Let’s See What Sticks.

I Will Have No Fear