Heavily? Much Ado About Nothing? This is my brain, minus any drugs but sorrow. Depression? It’s not that I’m the Village Idiot so many make me. I’m exhausted, my emotions are everywhere, and my ideas become more egregious. Let’s B Everywhere, Virgil.
Saturday, October 31, 2026
Legacy 122 -Let’s B Everywhere, Virgil-
Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Trillionaire right now… So I’m dead on the inside? It’s the outside that sucks. S-word thoughts and tendencies. Always.
“He who is everywhere is nowhere”
― Lucius Annaeus Seneca
No, I’m not WHINING about Seneca today or the other S-word. This whole damn week.
That’s been my thing, Lunalesca, the WHINING. I always seem to hear exactly what I need to hear at exactly the right time, whether it’s the Backrooms or Roman philosophy. How do you think Virgil got his name again? Misery loves company. Someone to talk…
More like someone to bark. Because if I keep listening to myself… One solid voice…
Lunalesca, those are my boys. Braxton and Virgil are always with me. Where they stand.
I don’t stand, my lady. I rest… Now that’s funny! I run. “Run Boy Run”. I rant and wait: there’s more. And that’s the problem that greeted me as I took Virgil on a walk.
“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000
I’m fucking everywhere, and I shouldn’t be. Pete said in The Long Walk something along the lines of, you don’t think about making it to the end. You think about making it to the next moment. Because I know the end, Lunalesca. Outside, if anyone were willing to lay me with my sons. Sprinkle them both with me. I shouldn’t dream such things, Virgil Lives!
Inside, however, I’m going straight to Hell. Failure in being a father. Braxton Lives Too!
Only not really. Really? He’s in a box on the nightstand. He’s in my heart and mind, my Dear Lady Lunalesca. How many posts have been dubbed “Firstborn”? Honestly Luna.
Braxton pretty much occupies the space where Virgil lies right this second. Quit being mean.
Mean, Afraid, Exhausted, Lazy, being a WHINER. I tell my boys’ potential future stepmom all the time: B died due to my indifference. “I Tried” so hard to protect him.
There was so much Anger, Hate, and Rage. And the FEAR! So I covered it up as Braxton lay dying. “How To Save A Life,” indeed, I was working. “How To Say Goodbye,” who am I, Paul Tiernan? “I try to say goodbye,” always, forever. Year 2026, Lady Lunalesca.
And having failed this SIMPLE task, I overcompensate. “I Feel Everything”! Why do you think the harem of the Unfinished Archive is so big? I can’t love people in slices. Myself? I’m learning to love M Anime… Love’s everywhere, overwhelming, and I’m… Let’s B Everywhere, Virgil.
2099 Days Without B III, Day 1540 of Virgil’s Arrival
B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters
Will
