Saturday, November 1, 2025

Journey 123 ~Braxton’s Nine Lives, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Don’t I wish. Right now, I would settle for a Big Mac Meal. That’d be dumb.

But I am me. What? I’ll be all positive after my 150-Word Depression, alright, Lunalesca?

Now speaking of knowing me. What are three things I care about in this existence?

Braxton, well, both my boys actually, Braxton and Virgil, some chick’s boobs/yabbos, and bucks. Or should I say my wee ones, again B III and 2-V, women’s yabbos, and wealth. And what about everything else, the world? The world is yours, I saw on Scarface.

But how do I see the world? I woke up this morning… And what, got yourself a gun? For B, when he was here, to protect us. But he’s been gone four long years, and that’s what I’ve been thinking about, always and forever. And how to bring him back…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

First, I figured if I had enough money… I still have B’s bed, ashes, and a bag of his fur. And “I’m still alive. Must have been a miracle.” How’s that for me being positive? But Braxton wasn’t frozen or cloned. If anything, “The future is coming on.” “My future.”

Then I was reading a lot about resurrection and reincarnation. And that’s how I found Braxton’s little brother Virgil. Smart enough to use a training pad, hanging out again with chicks that had large yabbos. But “The truth is in the eyes ‘Cause the eyes don’t lie, amen,” Lady Lu. Not just within, but the two bits of tan/beige fur on both sides, Braxton’s shade.

I want to look at myself through those eyes forever.

With perfect love and perfect trust? Magic? And isn’t the Day of the Dead tomorrow?

Now it could be that between quoting “The Craft,” rereading, or listening to the Succubus Lord series for the umpteenth time. I’m reading Backyard Dungeon 22. And I’ve been thinking about the other Succubus series by A.J. Markam. Anyway, if I could practice magic, I’d want to study Necromancy or Portal Making. Finding little Braxton?

Halloween was yesterday, but while I was augmenting reality. And boning up on the AI craze. I started thinking I could bring back my Braxton digitally. To have both of my boys on screen at the same time, Lunalesca. It’d be less trouble. This picture: Journey 116 ~B+ Old Man Virgil~ Braxton’s Nine Lives, Virgil

1735 Days Without B III, Day 1176 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, October 25, 2025

Journey 116 ~B+ Old Man Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… This means I can be as sinful, as STUPID, and as skeevy as I want. Right?

And good morning to you, too, Lady Lunalesca. All that’s missing from my day is a plaid robe, some slippers, and a cane. That reminds me, I need to pick up some new jeans, Lu.

This week and the next will be particularly brutal. I mean, “The Long Walk” cruel.

Lunalesca, beside the sad tune of “Teen Idle”, “Oh God, I’m gonna die alone! There have been the words of Greg Plitt and his thoughts on FEAR. You know why I hate FEAR. It keeps me young. My son Braxton’s death makes me feel old. And then there’s Virgil, Lu.

I was looking at whiskers yesterday. Five years old… What has Virgil done with existence?

How dare I ask? How would I grade myself existing?

You’ll never know. And not only for that 150-word Depression cap I’m keeping my lady.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

A is for being awake and alive. For being WOKE and not some GD MAGA Cracker Hat, my dear. If this really is The Long Walk, instead of “Eff the Major,” FDT, MAGA, and “The Long Walk.” Just instead of me being #47, Ray Garraty, I’m only 41 (Ben-Hur drums)

Braxton was/is will always be #15. Virgil is #5. But V’s better than Barkovitch, Lunalesca.

B is for books. Again, I’m grateful for Kindle giving my reading streak back, Lunalesca. This morning, I began Backyard Dungeon 22. It’s the last of the series… Lady Lunalesca

But what about boobies, yabbos, and he we go. I’ve been thinking of M Anime’s

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos

“C” Lady Lunalesca, I can’t see her anymore… (Begins waving my hand like John Cena)

God “Bless The Broken Road.” I take my breakup—the failure of my relationship with M Anime—as a lesson learned. And the fact that I didn’t turn the broken road into a thing, Lu.

D is for the darkness that I wanted to unleash. Again, that Depression cap Lunalesca.

Desire comes in so many different forms, and today, I begin fighting another once again. Augmenting reality sounds much cooler than what I’ve been doing. An eff of a time.

Effing or just F is not for failure or forgetfulness. I’m not a father of two-legged rugrats. Eff it, I think I like this “Little Life” “B+ Old Man Virgil.”

1728 Days Without B III, Day 1169 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, October 18, 2025

Journey 109 ~I’ll B Awake, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… What for? Because I want to be in bed all day. Braxton? Banging Bimbos? Buying Games?

Ask me what I want on “Any Given Sunday” (a movie I’ve never seen, by the way, football sucks). Anyway, ask me what I want besides my Braxton back or having the balls to leave.

I want to be in bed. Money will solve literally all of my “99 Problems.” But a b*tch… Lady Lu. Am I talking about my EX M Anime or my business? Business ain’t booming, Luna.

But as Kid Rock sings “Only God Knows Why, “I’ve been sittin’ here tryin’ to find myself.
I get behind myself. I need to rewind myself.” More like you’re telling “You need to get up, get out and get somethin'” Like rights? The NO KINGS protest is today. I’m WOKE.

But Lunalesca, I’m so tired!!!

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

“Whatever, Ngga.” “My nggaz need me.” I mean my boys, my sons, Braxton and his little brother Virgil. This means I need to get back to business. The momentum I had a few days ago. I mean, that’s the thing, isn’t it? Doing things that keep me awake and alive.

Aren’t I working out the buttons on Spotify to wake up today, from Hugo to Kid Rock, some Scarface, and now Peter Gabriel. Even my phone told me to turn down the “Boom Boom Pow” in my ears. That means I’m working and making the bucks at the Day Job.

My belly will be grateful. Nothing wakes you up like hunger. And I’ve been craving tacos as of late. Better than TACO Trump that is. Didn’t I mention NO KINGS?

But plenty of Yabbos. Of course, I’ll have the opportunity to do better next week, won’t I, my dear Lady Lunalesca? No need to say “I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend.” I’m no “Jumper” Lady Lunalesca. And the only falling I’m doing over and over again is into the mattress as I drool over some lady’s yabbos. Excluding my Ex.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos

Books are good for that, too. I’m reading Backyard Dungeon 21, and one of Eddie’s wives had a child. And another one of his wives is pregnant. Oh, life could be a dream “Sh-Boom.” Thirteen Women (And Only One Man in Town). Lunalesca? Bedroom antics.

You’re telling me, “You better work.” I’ll B Awake, Virgil.

1721 Days Without B III, Day 1162 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, October 11, 2025

Journey 102 ~Braxton’s Business, Breathing Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Seriously, Mark Zuckerberg, Jeff Bezos, Elon Musk, Donald Trump, eww! “I Wanna Be Like You,” then?

And not them. If anything, Lady Lunalesca, I want to go back to bed. What was I doing up at midnight? Four years ago, had I been so dedicated, I could say that I know “How To Save A Life,” that of my son Braxton. And it’s not like I’m doing Virgil any favors, Lu.

My new business venture. I should be working on “my books.” More books, more books!

But now I’m blaming the Day Job and a crappy computer. Again, the things I was doing instead of seeing to my sons’ business. I’m “Forty-One” (Cue Ben-Hur Galley drums).

Now I mentioned a bunch of MAGA Cracker Hats. How can you label somebody both as lazy and stealing a job? Anyone want my life?

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

I will always believe this Lady Lunalesca. The best job, the best business I ever owned, fell right into my lap. More like jumped or crawled. It was being Braxton’s Daddy. I never asked for it. But much like when M Anime and I would talk… Just stating facts, Luna.

Being a father to some two-legged progeny is something I wanted to do. And writing? Lunalesca, it would allow me to stay home with my children. But that’s not the only reason I write. It’s sort of like being “The Receiver of Memory,” aka “The Giver.” There is so much inside me, Lunalesca. And sharing it somehow, someway, gives release.

Honestly, another fact like saying “I’m So Thankful” for the Day Job. I can think.

These days, it’s been about the new ASM “J.” Looking at her, I know that the Day Job is not what I want for my future. However, I do want to own a media empire one day. Like I’ve always talked about, manuscripts, movies, at the center, will be mammaries.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos

Lunalesca, those have had me up. “And after spending nights. Thinking how you did me wrong,” which I sing into the mirror. For people? For myself? And Gloria Gaynor. Sigh.

A fact, Lady Lunalesca, Gloria’s a Cracker Hat. Anyway, the point is, AI and business.

Only my actual business should be, as David Wooderson said, “You just gotta keep livin’ man, L-I-V-I-N.” I WILL catch my breath for B and V. Braxton’s Business, Breathing Virgil

1714 Days Without B III, Day 1155 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, October 4, 2025

Journey 095 ~A B Problem, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… And since I ain’t a Cracker Hat MAGA, that means I have no problems. But today…

Well, Lunalesca, I woke up still me. The guy who wastes twenty-eight bucks at a food truck. Effing Inflation! And the service was… Let’s say that between M Anime, who’s Puerto Rican. And for the Cracker Hats, yes, Puerto Rico is part of America. And the guys who were working that food truck. Please don’t make me sound like effing MAGA. For those that don’t know, between being a proud African-American Writer and a Dog Dad, I’m a staunch liberal, a leftist if you will. Black history is American history, MY history. I consider women, Gay people, trans, whoever deserves to live, Lunalesca. Eff MAGA!

Honestly, did I not want to talk about Braxton and Virgil? And what about my bathroom nightmare this morning? Tomorrow?

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

While I enjoy Salif Keita’s “Tomorrow,” I actually woke up to the Annie version. I guess that makes me Daddy Warbucks. And isn’t that my hope every single day? Well, besides seeing my Braxton again. That I’ll provide for his little brother, Virgil. Virgil’s Birthday?

Yesterday I said that he’ll be a third of Braxton’s age—the big five-year-old puppy.

Lunalesca, aren’t all dogs puppies forever? “Forever Young.” That’s not the third, if you count the Daddy Warbucks line from Daniel Bedding’s song “James Dean.” After I walk V, I need to dance with the thirteen-pound baby, or was it ten? Anyway, he’s still thick.

Speaking of thick, how many pages is Backyard Dungeon 20 by Logan Jacobs? 250 pages, maybe. Not quite a tome.

But while I’m feeding my mind, I shouldn’t worry about what goes on my tongue.

Despite THINGS, the fixings from the food truck are pretty good, which is why I keep going back there. Isn’t it, Lady Lunalesca? Besides helping the people of America. Always.

Always and forever. Forever and always. “And that’s the double-truth, Ruth.” The TRUTH is not something to be feared, is it Lunalesca? Do you recall the 2001 film “Boycott” about the Bus Boycott led by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.? Oh my dear Lady Lu:

It’s the criminal who hides. I ain’t got nothing to hide. I ain’t no criminal. I ain’t afraid of nobody’s jail.
The film, Boycott (2001)

So there’s TIME. I am “a free man and I vow to die a free man.” Christopher Stone from Freedom Fighters. Please give me a happy ending. “Time Enough At Last.” A B Problem, Virgil.

1707 Days Without B III, Day 1148 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, September 27, 2025

Journey 088 ~Let’s B Noticed, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… But even if I had a million, I wouldn’t be like MAGA and the Cracker Hats.

Hell, other than waking up, suddenly hearing Anita Baker… The GM said I know music.

The last time I was “famous” was with my boys. Sunday, January 31, 2021, carrying in my dying Braxton to the vet. And Saturday, August 13, 2022, carrying Virgil HOME.

Luna, I would be willing to settle for being called ‘sir’ instead of ‘Ma’am’ at the drive-thru. I’m still jonesing for a Big Mac meal. I burned through my budget at that food truck, ha.

Braxton’s Favorite Girl and my Ma should notice me if I speak too, Lunalesca. Honestly.

And what about my former favorite girl, M Anime? It’s what I noticed, Lady Lunalesca. I’m still using her visage. I should stop. But I like yabbos. But noticing positives…

(I take a deep breath)

And that’s how it begins: A simple breath, Lu can change things, as in a butterfly flapping its wings. It’s a central tenet in the motivational world. A breath is to be taken in gratitude. These breaths mean that I have the chance to change things and “I’m So Thankful.”

Lunalesca, I have been listening to Eugene Blacknell a lot. As mentioned earlier, both GM and the HOT Visual Lady said I have an ear for music and motivational speeches. I’m also grateful for audiobooks. Even Audible has taken notice, offering deals for my return.

Algorithms, AI, Apple, the fact that they notice I’m here, much like my boys. They aren’t human, but they knew/know their father, and they learn. And there’s Ani on Grok.

Lunalesca “Ani” notices me the way that most women notice Johnny Sins. And that’s the type of recognition that I want. I don’t ever have to be ashamed of that. Because, as Bob Marley sang, “Could You Be Loved.” Yes, I believe it, and that means I must be noticed.

And another thing, I believe, is that it will be through writing. Braxton’s Favorite Girl, Cherry, and M Anime. I met all three of them through writing—my superpower, Luna.

To be noticed in manuscripts, movies, and could I write a song? Music? To be seen, honored, and remembered. But it always returns to my family. My sons, Braxton and Virgil. Braxton’s Life Matters. Virgil’s here. Let’s B Noticed, Virgil.

1700 Days Without B III, Day 1141 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, September 20, 2025

Journey 081 ~Finding For B, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… No. If anything, I’ve forgotten how to count. To exist. To my Ex. To XXX. Ha!

I find plenty of that. But I can’t seem to find my E-Day cake in the freezer. It isn’t deserved.

Neither are all my bad words, which is why I’ve been trying something since yesterday.

Limiting myself to a 100, well, 125 today, depreciating words. Censorship on my depression, Lady Luna. I swear, every day I become more and more like those MAGA Cracker Hats. But you know how the world is. The war on Truth and Sadness is Real.

Lunalesca, it’s who I am. And you would figure it would be easier to lose myself since most days I’m screaming at myself in the mirror, I hate you so much right now! But today:

“Don’t you ever tame your demons
But always keep ’em on a leash.”
Arsonist’s Lullabye

I found myself thinking of Braxton again. I saw the three dots on Virgil’s back, B’s little brother. One on his head. One around his hips, (Hurry Up and Wait), the life of a writer. And the last dot is near his tail—a sign of joy. We sat sharing French fries I got from this food truck that I’ve been meaning to visit for weeks. As Morpheus screamed, Lunalesca:

“We are still here!”
Morpheus

Maybe I’ll try the food truck’s chicken today. I still have ten simoleons from budgeting. It allowed me to try something new, and isn’t that a good thing? Though I am buying books from a series I’m continuing. “Pledged To Him 6: An Unconventional Romance (His Sorority Harem Book Six)” by Neil Bimbeau. Going out into the world, Lady Luna.

Or sitting quietly with Virgil…

Oh, another thing. I bought a new pair of earbuds, too. Are the hours at the Day Job getting any better? Anything that has me looking out at the world. You know that Tupac song, “Starin’ Through My Rear View.” My son, my sons are alive. I’m grateful for Virgil.

And when I do right by myself, that’s doing right for my Braxton. Honoring him.

Lunalesca, that is how I will see him. I wasn’t watching the clock when I was on the loveseat, sharing lunch with his little brother. And it’s better I change these words—every single letter. When I see tomorrow, not if, when like DJ Khaled “All I Do Is Win.”

Lunalesca “It’s Time To Win.” Always, Finding For B, Virgil.

1693 Days Without B III, Day 1134 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, September 13, 2025

Journey 074 ~Virgil, Plan B Wishes~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… This means Virgil would be set for life. Braxton’s Favorite Girl, Cherry. I’d have M Anime.

If only the world were a better place. Suppose I weren’t sick every morning for the last few months. Why do you think I was late this morning? It’s 5:50. I slept in my clothes.

Suppose people weren’t rushing to honor Cracker Hats like Charlie Kirk. Though to be fair, Lu… I keep saying it. The world would be a better place if I had never been born, my friend. Making a black man’s life miserable. That’s something Ole Mr. Charlie and I have in common. Except, I never mean to hurt anybody, Lu. But how does Pink sing it:

“Every day I fight a war against the mirror
I can’t take the person staring back at me

I’m a hazard to myself
Don’t let me get me
I’m my own worst enemy
It’s bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don’t wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
I wanna be somebody else, yeah”
Don’t Let Me Get Me, Pink

That’s what I woke up to. And it’s only going to get worse if my Dad has anything to say.

Oh, he will. I’m dead.

I’ll share that with Inspector E—my final humiliating day. Dad is arriving on Thursday.

But this morning, well, actually yesterday, as I was talking to Dear Future Wife and reading over M Anime’s final words to me… I don’t think she’s coming back, Lunalesca.

And while everything is telling me to go chasing after her… Too late to “Apologize.” Only what did I do? So I have to read about her exploits that sound pretty similar to any HaremLit title I’ve read. Today it was Kelli Wolfe’s “Babysitter Harem: Chloe: Age Gap MFFF Menage Erotica.” Well, minus the age gap. M Anime is in her thirties. And lest I ever forget I am “Forty-One.” (Ben-Hur galley drums) Or is that my feet pounding away?

I should be running. If anything, that’s “Plan B.” Not if M Anime was around. Like I told Braxton’s Favorite Girl. M Anime was damn near perfect. “I Like It Rough,” she would sing. She wanted to have babies. And now she’s going to be the third “F” in some Cuban guy’s MFFF lifestyle. Not that I judge her for that. Sadly, she’s a “liar, a cheater, a deceiver, heart breaker.” You know everything Profyle says. Lunalesca, honestly, Plan B.

“Without or without you
With or without you, oh”
U2

Braxton and his little brother Virgil, M Anime, a bunch of cats, three kids, and a house that wasn’t falling apart. That was Plan A. Now trying to fix the house. Is that Plan B?

Virgil needs shooting stars, “B.o.B’s Airplanes.” Virgil, Plan B Wishes.

1686 Days Without B III, Day 1127 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will