Saturday, January 24, 2026

Journey 207 ~Compute B-V Minus M~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… And as dumb as most billionaires are, I’m sure they know their math. Eff me Lunalesca!

Well, not really! If anything, I should be effing M Anime, but no. I only want to remember this moment. M Anime’s Wedding Day? 5-Month Anniversary of breaking up? Guess.

Because I honestly don’t know. But I’m sitting on the loveseat, Virgil’s sleeping away the day, and Braxton’s spirit awaits my tears. But today is for M Anime. Potential Mrs…

Lunalesca, she’s not anymore, but if I could talk to her… Three-hundred words or less…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

M Anime,
It’s been five months. You ended a friendship of years and haven’t tried for five months. Hell! Neither have I. Because, like that August morning last year, I have no words on whatever happened. I still don’t know. I want to say I was wrong, which makes sense.

But that would make you like everybody else. That I simply being alive is wrong. Honestly, you are better. Or so I believed. You made me believe. Friends, fucking, family.

Love! A thing called love. After my Braxton. God, I told you all about my boys, you picked my brain, and I wanted to share my bed with you. And let’s not forget those books…

Everything I am I shared with you, and you didn’t back away until Sunday Morning.

Seriously, do you remember that? Music. You got me in a way no one has ever done in this life. Well, Braxton and his Favorite Girl? Braxton would have liked you. Virgil would have too. And Braxton’s Favorite Girl was already planning our wedding when I told her all about you. I wanted to tell the world. Someday maybe. Every day since you up and left. And again, I still don’t know why. Communication! Now that was always your thing.

That’s All I Ask Of You! You could have asked anything of me. There were no secrets between us. Am I ugly? Did I not have enough money? Did I bring up Braxton too much?

That last one… Guilty as charged, and that’s never changing. I love my Braxton. And I believed I was falling in love with you. And I wish you all the love in the world, still.

Love, May God’s love be with you always. Always and Forever. I believed in us, once. Compute B-V Minus M.

1819 Days Without B III, Day 1260 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, January 17, 2026

Journey 200 ~This’ll B Hell, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… So is it hot in the Fourth Circle of Hell? According to Succubus Lord, it’s nice.

Still dreaming I’ll be Jacob with twenty different women. No, my dreams have not been so lovely as of late. But remind me I have to restart my WANK counters sometime today, Lunalesca. The whole year shot to Hell because of Supersized Slobberknockers. Uh, no…

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos

But there were a lot of them—seventeen days’ worth. But we’ll get to that shortly. First, what is Hell? Shouldn’t I be asking, or instead singing, “What Is Love?” I want to look both up, but a crappy computer, plus caving to an online game… Whiteout Survival. And canines. Virgil in this world and Braxton in the next. So Lunalesca, here’s my two cents.

Hell to me is waking up. Different than being WOKE. Fuck MAGA and FDT always.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I’ll stay WOKE ATF as the kids would say… Really? Anyway, what I mean is being awake in the literal sense, frozen, funds lost, and not a friend in the world. Didn’t I say my boys are here? Didn’t I talk to Braxton’s Favorite Girl yesterday? And I even spoke with my alliance this morning. But the noise, the knowing that I’m not a nice person, and the never-ending FEAR. Of people? Of failing my boys? No, I’ll never get over it. I swear I’ll never know ACCEPTANCE when it comes to my son. I mean, call me a monster. My grandfather died in January a few years back. But I mourn Braxton and not some man, Lady Lunalesca. Somebody That I Used To Know.

Like “Me So Horny.” If I don’t go directly to the Ninth Circle of Hell, that’s Treachery for those in the know. I’ll go to the Second Circle of Hell, Lust. Hello Luna, if I didn’t betray Braxton, then all of the ICE agents, Cracker Hats, and MAGA enthusiasts that end up on the business end of the noose will fill up the Ninth Circle quickly—the good ole USA.

Lunalesca, I was all about Hentai, an Asian mom, and women taking their yabbos everywhere, while I made a mess. Eww! Virgil was late getting me out of bed, Lu. I can’t blame him. His name comes from Dante’s Inferno, yet I wanted him to have Sympathy For The Devil. Living? This’ll B Hell, Virgil

1812 Days Without B III, Day 1253 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, January 10, 2026

Journey 193 ~Braxton’s Off Days Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… How? Did I create some all-powerful energy shot? Hell, can we agree on no more “five-hours?”

All I know is I was exhausted yesterday. And don’t forget starving. Then the rain.

Honestly, that’s the only reason I didn’t stop at the food truck. Don’t they sell burgers as well? Braxton would love them being so close by. Anyway, I had to support a billion-dollar corporation, so McDonald’s it is. An hour or so later, I’m conked out, only to have to read about how I failed my son, I miss wrestling, and the storm won’t let up a tiny bit, Lunalesca. Virgil’s been inside forever… But before that, he crapped outside the bedroom. So he’s been in time-out. And speaking of time-out, after taking a shower.

Seriously! That’s me in the corner. That’s me in the spotlight. Losing my religion,” Luna.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Yesterday was my first breakdown day of the new year. A Friday? Sunday is always the worst when it comes to the week. One exception is The Walking Dead… Maybe.

However, the worst months of the year are January, August, and September. Why is that?

January is when Braxton died. And in this particular January, M Anime (My Ex) is getting married, if she isn’t already. And on the 24th, will I ever speak of her ever again? I don’t know, but in the words of Teen Idle, “Oh God, I’m gonna die alone.” SIGH

Lunalesca, I’m not sure when I met M Anime, but she left Sunday, August 24, 2025. And I started ruining Virgil’s life on Saturday, August 13, 2022. And then September…

“Wake Me Up When September Ends…” So cut to me being Forty-One (cue Ben-Hur galley drums). Lying on the floor in a bath towel, feeling like Tommy Pickles bottle less.

And that was a Friday night. Was it Braxton, that burger, or some Bourica’s yabbos?

Braxton was my rock or “The Rock” because “It Doesn’t Matter!” That’s his barking, Lu.

Mr. No Days Off. Any “I watch my youngest son, and it helps to pass the time.” That would be Braxton’s little brother, Virgil. He’s been pacing forever and a day waiting for the rain to end. And what about the pain? Why do I relate to The Long Walk, The Running Man, The Mill, etc.? No days off. Live? Die? Braxton’s Off Days Virgil

1805 Days Without B III, Day 1246 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, January 3, 2026

Journey 186 ~The B Times Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… So I don’t read the news. I make the news. A regular “Bruce Almighty” over here.

And what was with that New York accent? Am I still sad that I missed the ball drop, Lu? I’m upset that my boy is still gone. And I need to remember to take some time off for B III.

Hell, why not the whole week, considering my ex-girlfriend is getting married on the 24th… I don’t know that. M Anime could be married right now, but our five-month breakup?

I should be really damn upset that I wasted the morning on Whiteout Survival. Yes, Lady Lunalesca, Virgil, and Braxton have had their walk. It’s still macabre and effing weird to say that about Braxton. Walking around with his ashes like the priests of old.

Speaking of priests, I haven’t jerked off this year… Yet…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Ain’t nobody got time for that sh*t in these streets. And Ain’t Nobody loves me better. I thought M Anime would… Biblically, ha! And I have to remind myself that it’s Virgil sleeping against my foot and not Braxton. Once again, it’s creepy I’m reading about dead fur buddies while he naps on me. And in this case, it’s my dead furry son. I’m reading about Lunalesca. But I hate him being gone more than I hate reading about it, so that’s saying something. Like, what time is it? It’s time for me to go forging. No, that was yesterday. But I was full of BS writing to Lady Sophia, the sky was filled with rain, and Virgil finds FEAR like me. Effing everywhere eek.

Like Chronomentrophobia. This very second, all I’m doing is wasting time. No, not like that, Lady Lunalesca. Have you ever seen the movie “The Little Death”? I haven’t either, Lunalesca. But that title sums up my B. But anyway, Lu, there’s this monologue that goes:

“Because she’s softer than you. She’s quieter than you. She doesn’t yell at me. She doesn’t call me an idiot or tell me to shut up all the time. She listens to me. She’s nice to me. She doesn’t make me feel like the only thing stopping her from being happy… is me.”
― Phil

I want you to focus on the quieter. That’s what’s getting to me at the start of the new year. There’s no news of a new me. It’s all effing NOISE! Why do you think I do everything to drown it out? How many times have I listened to Succubus Lord or Satan’s Sorority Girls?

M Anime’s ruffled wedding dress, Virgil’s whining, and me being worrisome. And I’m supposed to care about the world. FDT! But… The B Times Virgil

“War. War never changes.”
Fallout

1798 Days Without B III, Day 1239 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, December 27, 2025

Journey 179 ~B III, 2-V, 12~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Or I would be if I understood Math. I could become a thief like MAGA. FDT.

No! Eff me for wasting another year of my existence! I knew? I had to wake up and say that, so I didn’t go to bed until 1:00 AM. And since 7:00 this morning, it’s been Whiteout Survival, women’s yabbos a blonde, an Asian, 2-B/2-V’s WAP since eff Nicki Minaj, that’s why. Effing Cracker Hat. And I can’t forget Virgil… and Braxton’s walk. I didn’t.

Lady Lunalesca, I didn’t win this year. So excuse the eff out of me for needing a few W’s to see the year off. Whiteout, women, wanking, and walks. “The Long Walk,” “The Running Man.” And Virgil is trying to “Stand By Me.” More like “Lay By Me.” Right Lu?

Lu or Lou? Like Louisa Clark from “Me Before You?”

“I fill my lungs with fear, and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

I’ve never read the book, but I’ve seen the movie… Ok, most of it, Lu. I know how it ends.

But how does THIS end? Lunalesca, if I took a lesson from my B III, I’d live in the now.

That would involve me looking up Alahna Ly naked. Emilia Clarke made it easier, ha! Damn these English girls, Emilia, Maisie, even Cherry. The hours I waste, but that’s why it’s one of my big three. Being with my boys, writing, and wanking nonstop. Yabbos.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos

Lunalesca, there are far too many to count and name, but the numbers? I remember.

Wrong again! I am literally looking at… Goals, Dreams, New Year’s Resolutions, a wish list, that says, “A Million Will Come On June 30, 2019.”

It’s Saturday, December 27, 2025, and I’m wondering, can I spend $5.00 on more Erotica? One more at “The Closing Of The Year.” I swear, today was supposed to be about “The “12 Wishes Ritual,” a “Release Letter to the Year,” hell, I’d take one of the “Mirror” prompts about writing. Though, to be honest, I want to delete that app. It’s like Brian Tyler Cohen… Makes sense, but tells me things I already know. White politicians commit crimes and face no justice. “These White Men Are Dangerous.” Seriously Lunalesca!

However, what about me? Am I forming a band with that title “B III, 2-V, 12”? This whole year has been a whole lot of nothing for me. Math ain’t Mathing. B III, 2-V, 12

1791 Days Without B III, Day 1232 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, December 20, 2025

Journey 172 ~Getting B’s Daily, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Nope! But even if I were, what would it have in common with broke, Lady Lunalesca?

Damage Report! These two words sum up this existence. The Big Beautiful/Ugly Mother Effing Damage Report! Oh, I’m in a mood today. It comes with wasting an existence you don’t even want, like the Day Job. I hate that place, but wasn’t I panicked, Lunalesca?

Like the young people used to say, “totes.” I’m way too old to try to keep up with the slang. Forty-One (Cue Ben-Hur Galley Drums). I’m also too old to be playing “Whiteout Survival at 6 AM, if you’re wondering why I’m so late this morning. Don’t worry, Virgil was lucky enough to get his walk and not get eaten. However, I was unlucky, Lunalesca.

Case in point, I am still right here, “Hurt.” I didn’t join my Braxton today.

“I fill my lungs with fear, and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

It’s not a B day or a C. D? Considering yet again I couldn’t keep mine in my pants last night. Leave it to Christmas porn. Not to be confused with Christmas Erotica. I finished “His Christmas Miracle Harem” last night. The writer really has a thing for Asian women.

I can relate… There’s this chick on Instagram…. Anyway, I started Christmas Obsession by Darcy Rose. It takes me back to a younger time when I was still too old to be chasing some Puerto Rican chick. You can see why I didn’t do well in school. I never learn.

Lunalesca, I made the same mistake with M Anime. “Wonderwall,” she was not, thank you, Ryan Adams. “What I Go To School For,” then? Busted!

I FAILED, I DROPPED OUT, I said I COULDN’T, I learned to speak BRAXTON, and Virgil, formerly ARCHIE. This in no way, shape, or form sounds like Christmas, my lady.

If anything, I’m remembering what it was like to be young—waking up a little earlier on a Saturday morning. But instead of a bowl of Lucky Charms and cartoons, I had a bar of Lucky Charms and an effing arms race on the phone and then walking little Virgil.

Lunalesca, I only want a Red-letter Day. And not “Someday At Christmas.” The only song more annoying than “All I Want For Christmas Is You.” And then Wham! Last Christmas. Don’t I wish Lady Lunalesca? Because this one… Effed and F! Getting B’s Daily, Virgil
1784 Days Without B III, Day 1225 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, December 13, 2025

Journey 165 ~Never B Ashamed, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Talk about a group of people who have no shame. I “Party Like A Rock Star.”

And I’m effing broke, a bum, and a boy pretending to be a man. I’m the dad of two boys… Always and Forever, Braxton. I don’t have $3000 duckets to my name. Didn’t I mention I’m glad the Termite Guy didn’t find any termites? And didn’t mention the Carpenter Ant invasion this “Cruel Summer?” And then there’s me always thinking with “My Ding-A-Ling. For the record, I can play the Shop Boyz and not Chuck Berry at the Day Job.

Lunalesca, I won’t have to worry about that next week. Don’t worry, I have hours the week after. Although I did return the speaker to the manager and caught her in a meeting with the other leaders… All women, if you haven’t guessed, my friend.

“I fill my lungs with fear, and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Feel free to say, “I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend.” I’m not a “Jumper” yet. But um, I think about it every morning. B, rock bottom, and then “boy, you’re in so much trouble.” How much remains to be seen? Humiliations Galore! And yet I tell everyone, “I’m here.” I’m reading erotica one minute, naked the next, and then between getting it up and posting on X/Twitter eww! I find the time for some Hamlet:

“To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles
And by opposing end them.”
Hamlet

Which of those should I be ashamed of, Lunalesca? What crimes shall I commit today?

Where will the Magic Glasses take me? Will I “steal” wrestling again? Depends on where Saturday Night’s Main Event is streaming tonight. I know the WWE is in Washington, D.C.

No matter what I do, I’ll never be as bad as MAGA and the Cracker Hats. FDT! I still feel horrible about what I said last night about the local food truck and ICE. But if I do go out today, I won’t go getting my usual Fried Shrimp and Fries. Again, no money, the two guys from last night had no manners, and where is their mother… Is my Ma proud of me, Lu?

Am I proud of myself? Braxton and Virgil, it’s always and forever. Well, 2-V did spit up/vomit in the bedroom yesterday. Anyway, with me, the answer’s not now and never.

But I did get a compliment on my writing. But then I opened my camera. EFF! Never B Ashamed, Virgil

1777 Days Without B III, Day 1218 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saturday, December 6, 2025

Journey 158 ~To B Powerful, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… And if MAGA has taught me anything, it’s that money is POWER. Old white rich guy…

Also, a criminal, con man, who has no business being around children. FDT every day.

Hell, if God… whoever you hold that to be, let me switch places with Johnny Sins. I’ve really been into a particular Asian mom lately… But anyway, I still wouldn’t call it even with God. Because neither it nor I had the POWER to save my B. My Braxton, Lunalesca.

“That is strength, boy! That is power! What is steel compared to the hand that wields it? Look at the strength in your body, the desire in your heart, I gave you this! Such a waste.”
Conan the Barbarian (1982)

“I can’t be. I want to be brave, and I want to be selfless, intelligent, and honest and kind. Well, I’m still working on kind.”
Veronica Roth ― Divergent (2014)

And that is what brings me to you today? Not the two titans that are my boys, Braxton and Virgil? What about some Asian mom’s tits… Eww! I’m feeling particularly raunchy today, or am I just being a perv? A MILF, Alex Chen, Mai Shiranui, Misty Olszewski, and whoever else tickles my peach. Beats sitting in bed all day. POWER.

“I fill my lungs with fear, and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

The power to walk from the bedroom to the den, Lady Lunalesca. Pathetic. Isn’t it? Lunalesca, if you want me to define it… Record scratch… Yup, that’s me. You’re probably wondering how I ended up in this situation… Lying in bed playing Whiteout Survival at all hours. Drooling over some woman’s yabbos. Or crying “Oh Where, Oh Where Has My Little Dog Gone.” Braxton, Virgil, or both. I’m not picky. As long as I’m not alone, Lunalesca. As long as someone is telling me what to do, making MAGA happy.

Lunalesca, “A MAN chooses, a SLAVE obeys.” Popular, Lunalesca… I want to be Powerful. But where does the power lie? How much time do you have? Isn’t it Ironic, Lu?

Again, two titans, tits/yabbos, time…

I could go into many other things, but it’s those three, like something Jigsaw concocted.

“Live or Die, Make your choice.” Or “Get busy living or get busy dying.” I continue “The Long Walk” with Virgil, or I’m “The Running Man,” looking to find my way to B III. And I have no POWER over that. And M Anime? “Stand by Me,” or more to the point, Lunalesca. Ruben sings “Lay By Me.” That’s the thing, everyone else has POWER.

Seriously, everyone else has the time in their minds. And you remember why I didn’t want to do Amazon. I don’t want to steal time, be STUPID with it, or be SCARED all of the time. Powerful, not to be afraid. To B Powerful, Virgil

1770 Days Without B III, Day 1211 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will