Saga 205 ~Virgil Dreams, Braxton’s Nightmare~

Don’t look up where I was on this day in 2021… Um, too Late! I was looking at boobs… for a book review, thank you. It’s the reason I got up on time today. Or was it the nightmare of my father? Dreams of my fur-kids? Virgil Dreams, Braxton’s Nightmare

Sunday, January 22, 2023

Saga 205 ~Virgil Dreams, Braxton’s Nightmare~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now. And while I wish you were me… uh, no. I pray you aren’t as forgetful or lazy…

Let’s address the elephant in the room. No! It’s better if it’s B III. He’s so much bigger in your mind right now. Friday, January 20, 2023. A day that will live in infamy. Fuck! Well, I forgot a quote for him. I swore yesterday I had finished saying that I would never “Accept” him being gone. And on a day when I felt so productive to a certain degree. Productivity means making it to the dining room table to write. I forgot B’s words. Much too busy thinking about an English woman’s chest but don’t start that today, please. Hell! How do you think you were up on time this morning? 15 minutes masturbating. Virgil was “displeased” being kicked out. Now Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Grief Recovery Handbook for Pet Loss by Russell Friedman
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums (Soon)
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 016 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 022 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

At least he’s not in trouble. He can come back at any time. Braxton’s door and the bedroom are wide open. Of course, he won’t, which is the only thing B has over 2V. Other than that, Virgil is living the dream. Did I mention you being productive today? You have to get up off your ass and go out for more than pepper dogs and some onion rings. B suffered that too. When he passed, I chose rings over fries. Waffles over pancakes. And what about all the chocolate? I didn’t allow it, never ever here. Loving Braxton Barks. Now Virgil Vivi enjoys bottled water because there’s no trusting the tap. He gets a new type of food etc. But hand-me-down Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Grieving the Loss of a Fur Baby by Becky Connellan
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums (Soon)
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 022 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Talk about nightmares. You had to look up one of our conversations. Braxton’s last week, Gospel 207 ~Hell With Instructions Will~. From January 21, 2021. Jesus, the man I was. Only as the song goes, “What have I become? My sweetest friend?” What about you? Dreams from last night… nightmares would be more accurate. My father was there. And he, above all else, says that before this week has even begun… Hell! Weren’t you on YouTube and Twitter a moment ago? Well, at least it wasn’t porn. Indeed, Black History. Fuck You Ron DeSantis! Anyway, dreaming of your father says one thing about you and Virgil. He’s living, but you’re not loving. Would one rather live or know love? Indifference Kills! Virgil Dreams, Braxton’s Nightmare

721 Days Without B III, Day 162 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 198 ~Virgil Piles On B~

Trying my best CJ impression. Ahem, “ah shit, here we go again.” But existing requires multiple uses of the word mother-effer. I can pick up anything else outside or raise it up so V can’t get to it. That’s B’s. But with every step, Virgil Piles On B

Sunday, January 15, 2023

Saga 198 ~Virgil Piles On B~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means while I “watch the money pile up,” so does time. But you? Pile of shit.

Whoa! Now that was harsh. But you were up at 4:05 AM. Need to remember how to set an alarm clock? You’re not in the best of moods now. Only think of Virgil… better, Braxton. One is scared, and the other’s dead. It is so hard to be positive. Again, all the time, huh? Martin Luther King Jr. would be proud, you think. Another reason to wake up early. Instead, let’s focus on you, which means your guilt about Braxton and Virgil today (sigh). The most pressing issue would be that Virgil needs more food. Which means picking your ass up and going to the store. Yet it occurred to me yesterday that getting up is like picking up Virgil’s… or, um, Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Maggot on Maple Street by Courtenay Schembri Gray
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book (Sometime Soon)
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 009 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 016 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Yeah, we can throw these away. Well, except for the two that I got done, ha-ha. Number four, I keep piling it on. Last night there was Sarah Kerrigan, the Queen of Blades from StarCraft. There’s also Nao Iihara from Resort Boin and Hitomi Kurumizawa in Megane no Megami. If I did as much research on making money as I do with Hentai… Fucking genius! That’s something you should try. You have time during the week, but you won’t ever. Besides picking up Virgil’s… You don’t mean to be so hard on the little guy. Again it’s everything going on with Braxton. I had this thought perhaps that’s what’s wrong with Virgil. Why he’s scared to take a step. Braxton’s everywhere, like Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Grief Recovery Handbook for Pet Loss by Russell Friedman
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums (Soon)
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 016 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

He’s on top of Braxton. Every step is where B III once was. The pillow, the bowls, the bed, even you. It’s like walking on a corpse. And who would want to do that? Republicans. Well, if anything, you’re going to spend money like one. No! You’re like a Democrat because you’re not thinking about yourself. Is that my advice for today? Think about Virgil? Braxton is more your speed. You should think about them both if the car’s running. Dammit! One more thing for your to-do list. And I don’t mean some yabbos, either. Money as in taxes. If you get a refund… Only B III died on the 31st; his birthday is February 13th. This fatherhood shit. And Virgil? Virgil Piles On B

714 Days Without B III, Day 155 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Lesson 325 ~Takes Two To Tango~

What if I were to put my phone down, there are some things you can only learn from practical experience, and you don’t want any distractions… love is the most important, but it’s a great big world outside. Takes Two To Tango I know that’s right.

Tuesday, May 22, 2018

Lesson 325 ~Takes Two To Tango~

Dear Future Wife,
Can You Love Me Again, when you find out my movie knowledge isn’t unlimited, and even my playlists won’t last forever but speaking of forever what else is there to do with this thing called love? Maybe I got lucky… us meeting when we did and while I wouldn’t mind the kids living Cobra Kai besides watching it on YouTube Red *sigh*, I suppose I’d be learning right along with them maybe.

I might be a bit freaked out if they turned into sports enthusiasts, except for as I said Martial Arts, Running, and the Olympics. Of course, I want to see the world with you, and taking a class together, do they still pass notes, and we can always go for a run “Silver Linings Playbook” style. I never learned how to ride a bike and… hmm interesting that while I’m trying to think of things that make me put my phone down I get why we’re usually on our behinds. A dance class maybe, while I did learn for our wedding, “Dirty Dancing” was a bit cliché that’s why we performed that number from Ellie Goulding’s “Love Me Like You Do” was that before or after our lightsaber duel and zombie skit, such are weddings.

If we’re going out to eat why not Dave & Buster´s, now honestly you were always more than a gamer girl to me, or a “Dancing Queen,” yeah besides 40’s and 50’s Nuclear Pop, and maybe a Lambada class, I am a teeny weeny into disco. No wonder Facebook considers me a moderate, we could always go to a shooting range too, and it would probably help to have you around, a black man near a gun these days and here I am with an angel. Yeah, I suppose my comedy could do with some work but no comedy shows; let’s go to a museum, walk through a bookstore, some scientific inquiry.

Plenty of stuff I enjoyed alone and with you… the world seems broader and then again smaller, it’s like when I introduce you to something I have loved for so long, and I get to see it through your eyes, and it can be so big and beautiful all over again. I get to see you as a friend, lover, wife, mother, and maybe that’s what scares me, the love I feel the love you feel for me I need it to spread so I can live and when we can share a love of something… or I could only love your butt; Sir Mix-a-Lot fan I’m afraid.

It all starts with me asking you to dance though and when did we first do that my love, they say, Takes Two To Tango.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 247 ~You Don’t Run From Beauty~

Would you rather be smart or beautiful, if you’re smart you would probably say beautiful, what’s one more dumb person but then again what’s one more pretty face, and I’m pretty stupid sadly. “You Don’t Run From Beauty” never.

Monday, March 5, 2018

Lesson 247 ~You Don’t Run From Beauty~

Twenty-Second Rule Madam Justice

I Am Not Afraid Anymore, my dog is the most fantastic thing ever, and my closet is full of color and skeletons, and as always I have been looked at as more of a beast, but there is no beauty to be found here. Music, Art, Poetry, etc. are beautiful; it’s widely known that medicine, law, business, engineering, these things give us what is thought to be civilization, but the beauty of women at least from my perspective is what gives life and sustains it.

The beauty of a woman is like a car wreck, you should mind your business, but you slow down; you inquire, and next thing you know you’ve created a more significant mess and you might die. At least a beast looks dangerous, cigarettes have warnings galore, but women hell in this day and age I think men are just idiots, which explains all the men in trouble these days; myself included hence the rule. Despite it all, I believe that beauty is a blessing rather than a curse, but that’s from the outside looking in, is it not; I’m not handsome, dashing, anything that can be mistaken for beautiful Justice.

“The only way to survive a mad world is to embrace the madness” The Good Man, Fear the Walking Dead

It was not the beast that conquered beauty but beauty that overcame the creature; I could compare beauty to a virus but don’t I do that with just about everything, the thing is that it’s a virus you want to catch. It infects your mind, makes you dumber and quickly drives you mad, impairs your speech, blinds you both physically and mentally; it makes you hunger for that which is already a gift, life. Speaking of being, what about that which you do not find beautiful, strangely enough, the laws are written by the ugly, and some of the most beautiful who have no intention of becoming ugly don’t want to be known for the beauty that they possess honestly.

If this was that episode of The Twilight Zone “Number 12 Looks Just Like You” I would be dead already, well worse than that maybe and again I already am as I hear people say. All of me, outside and in depending on who you ask. A world full of beauty and I have known ugliness and nothing more so maybe my rule is somewhat off because truthfully whatever could I do to escape it, other than keeping “it” in my pants, my hands to myself, and what’s the rate on bell towers these days?

“Where you gonna go, where you gonna run, where you gonna hide? Nowhere… ’cause there’s no one like you left.” Carol Malone, Body Snatchers (1993)

Madam Justice have I ever been running or am I just letting it kill me, lust is a fever, want, desire, and what is beauty without a beast or could I become a man, a frog kissed by a princess; You Don’t Run From Beauty.

“Well, a respectable member of the medical community once told me that money can make anyone look beautiful.” Too Cute

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 204 ~It’s The Good Heat~

Without a doubt fear is the ultimate cold and have I always been this frozen in place, paralyzed, hard, wanting nothing more than soft, warm blankets, my cuddly dog, and a cup of hot cocoa when I’m not too lazy to get up. It’s The Good Heat

Sunday, January 21, 2018

Lesson 204 ~It’s The Good Heat~

To Will:
I Am Not Afraid Anymore, are you ever too lazy for fear, is that what this is or are you too busy trying to keep it in your pants; by the way, good job with that, definitely going on the list. Here’s the question though, what happened to your anger, your passion, and the weather is getting warmer, so you honestly have no excuse for being wrapped up indoors the way you have; yet another thing for the list of six impossible things.

Indeed Hell is not an impossible thing, and maybe I’m too blame with the forced censorship of she who will not be named, is that to blame also for this depression, that you are getting out of this week. Yeah, you’ll have quite an itinerary this week, and I’m sure you’ll be mad enough and man enough because you’re going back to the day job as well. What was that I just mentioned about Hell, that’s just it isn’t it, you can’t stand being cold and I don’t just mean physically but spiritually as well.

You have a heart in there someplace, I know it but what have we been using as fuel nowadays other than your own words and why are looking to hate more, feel lust, not that those are bad things considering where you are. Who was it that said, any place you never leave becomes a prison, and since you don’t feel the house is a home, home is where the heart is, and that’s always with the dog, but he might be a cellmate with your work and depression which isn’t a good thing. My point is you have to find other ways to stay warm without being wrapped up in the covers, hating some stupid bitch and the rest of the world, and porn binging.

Now while finding the Esther to your Benji might be too far I’m thinking that you honestly should start believing six impossible things before breakfast and so those six goals will be the following list:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants, (Day 25 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Go Outside, Not Work Or Walmart, But Starbucks, Bookstore, Library
3. I Will Not Censor Myself
4. I Will Smart Off To Somebody At Work
5. I Will Focus More On The Dog And Actual Pretty Girls
6. I Will Work On My NaNoWriMo Novel

This list seems quite attainable doesn’t it and as I said this must become a thing if life is ever going to get better, take for example you won’t be crawling back under the covers today. Make the bed, eat something, take a shower, and you have four hours of work at the dining room table before you start reading.

Will it’s always time to do the right thing; okay, couldn’t say that with a straight face but as the song goes, get up, get out, and get something started; living, It’s The Good Heat.

I Will Have No Fear