Log 323 ~Will, Steal My Sunshine~

Last week I talked some about work, and with the plague year, well, I know I’m in the “control” group, and that can’t be helped. However, even when I have a job I love and the woman I love, I still won’t be eager to go out. “Will, Steal My Sunshine.”

Tuesday, May 19, 2020

Log 323 ~Will, Steal My Sunshine~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which should mean it’s time to get back to work? Wasn’t it sometime last week Baby Doll, I was saying I don’t wanna? I’m sorry I must be thinking about the Day Job I had once upon a time. Now that was no fairytale, and while I LOVE what I do now, I want to stay with you. Well, unless you try to take it away, but that’s neither here nor there. I was only looking over my schedule for the week and SIGH. If only I could take you with me and I hope to someday. Duty calls My Love.

The thing is, as the song goes, I got sunshine on a cloudy day. I’m going to be burning up when I get to the studio but not with anger. Yes, I keep thinking about the Day Job, and that’s all there was for me, RAGE. Now “I’m On Fire,” but I want the sunshine you bring. While I bring up celebrities like The Temptations and Bruce Springsteen. Again another song ahem. I’ll be the greatest fan of your life. So you don’t have to wonder why I want to stay here with you. My furry kid, warm bed sheets, and hot as Hell wife. There was a time I was satisfied with only hoodies. Yes, I know I still wear them, and that won’t be changing anytime soon. Always when it comes to you, Baby Girl, what else can I say, you give me Fever, too many songs maybe?

Besides my singing, why all this talk of heat? The days of the plague, Coronavirus (COVID-19). It doesn’t scare me, no, not at all. As a matter of fact, Baby Girl, if you ever want to turn me on, Zombies, Plague Era, and world destruction. One more song, I hope, I’m “George Romero,” and you’re “My Post-Apocalyptic Zombie Survival Fantasy.” A conversation for another time. Only I’m not looking forward to going back out into Hell, the state of our country. How about the one people say I’m going to for doing what I do in life. Could we always crawl back inside the covers and play some video games? Did I suggest that for reals? Well, your husband is a bit of a geek and a book nerd sometimes.

You’re So Damn Hot, okay, this is the last song promise; Will Still My Sunshine.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 340 ~I’m Your #1 Fan~

It’s probably a sin this didn’t work out the way I was picturing it, why I’m not a reactor, and even less of a reviewer am I right; fame and fortune and women, how many of my sins come back to that, my ultimate fandom. I’m Your #1 Fan.

Wednesday, June 6, 2018

Lesson 340 ~I’m Your #1 Fan~

Forgive Me Echo,
Can You Love Me Again, at least before I go to Hell, in the meantime a brother has to stay warm however he can and for today’s sin, if you’re paying attention, it’s been all about my fandoms, Quantic Dream “Detroit: Become Human,” “The Walking Dead”, etc.

Now several of these actually consist of multiple sins, but I’ve chosen to focus on four, and no I do not include Treachery, though I’m sure I’m guilty of that as well but what am I the number one fan of; I mentioned my mother destroying TMNT once *sigh* if she knew me now sadly.

“I got news for ‘hem… There’s gonna be hell to pay. ‘Cause I ain’t daddy’s little boy no more.” ― Nada/Roddy Piper, They Live (1988)

FRAUD, fake it to you make it they say and everyday Inspector Echo, I want to, I “try,” but I’m nothing to them, and I can’t even stand to look at my face in the mirror sometimes, I’ve disappeared, I’m not me anymore, or worse, them. It would have been okay to be daddy’s little sports fanatic, or a religious nutcase, to stay the butt of all their jokes. I was telling “Cherry” I can’t wipe this smile off my face for anything, a crime.

Maybe that’s why I bathe in blood… not for real Inspector Echo but give me “The Purge,” The Walking Dead, the riot in Detroit: Become Human, like those androids yes I wholeheartedly agree VIOLENCE is one of the universal languages. Much like music, it’s taken me years, but I understand the let’s say, physical conations in rap music and rock, but how many fights have I been in; next time…

Speaking of which ANGER, thinking and doing but that rage I swear sometimes it just overtakes me and sometimes watching other people indulge… to think if I said watching people engage in sex, I’m into voyeurism (Consensual), people would call me a peeping tom. Anyway, what I like about anger it’s like wearing an executioner’s mask or something akin to The Joker, but again I hate smiling, and in my rage, I become something different, more or less human, right?

LUST, of course, is my favorite because I can equate it to everything, today I wanted to more or less create a list of fandoms but as I said Detroit Become Human (North, Chloe, Kara), The Walking Dead, The Purge, “The Hunger Games,” “Divergent,” I could go on. Now, of course, this is a big subject, and maybe I don’t want to ruin something else… I mean The Walking Dead is losing Rick Grimes and possibly Maggie (NO), and I’ve already spoiled Detroit Become Human watching other people’s walkthroughs honestly.

“Mama don’t like tattletales.” Nada

So what do I need forgiveness for, Inspector Echo please forgive me for not enjoying other people’s fandoms, sports for one; I’m sorry I’m not just a fan of mine but I become Annie Wilkes obsessed, I’m Your #1 Fan.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 333 ~The Stench Of Defeat~

Can you smell what the Will is cooking, despite one good endorsement everything else around here stinks to high Heaven, or maybe that’s me, working too hard or scared of looking like I’m hardly working? “The Stench Of Defeat”

Wednesday, May 30, 2018

Lesson 333 ~The Stench Of Defeat~

Forgive Me Echo,
Can You Love Me Again, even when I can’t smell what The Rock is cooking, maybe when all there is to breathe is more shrimp or microwave dinners. I’ve never thought to turn the oven on since being here. How about the stress sweat but I’m too lazy to go looking for the commercial, I should probably go and take a shower if I wasn’t nearly drowning already with so many waves.

What about so many smells; it took me forever to get out of the scent of gummy bears I ripped into after work; my cooking range is limited enough, but today, I’ve only had barbecue chips and candy. Speaking of limited time, how about all that time spent tagging clothes at work today, when everybody looks at you as a failure, when you try to help a coworker, and you overstay your welcome, not to mention good ole S.A.D. It doesn’t help matters any that as hot as it is, I’m wearing my security blanket, my hoody for most of the day, you know right?

Cleanliness is next to godliness they say, but I’m just a man, and if anything, men do stupid things, I got a bit into “Manscaping” all because of women, and at this rate, it doesn’t matter, to be honest. Hell Inspector Echo how long did I go without a shower during all my days of writing oh yeah and spoiling myself watching a walkthrough of “Detroit: Become Human,” I’m addicted, but that’s only making me work harder on my writing isn’t it? Yes, that’s what I’m doing, I’m spoiling because if you’re not living you’re dying and either way it goes all I want to do is cover myself in something dirty and some green.

Preferably I would instead go with cremation but when it comes to dirt, the muck and the mire, something that straight up stinks, it’s the ideas that come into my mind, and that’s not stopping anytime soon. What about the elephant in the room, I’m the shit, or I should believe that because this is the only way anything is going to get done; with as messy as I am now all I want to do is sleep in my cool “clean” bed just saying.

I’m sorry Inspector Echo, will you forgive me for stinking up the joint, for being too hot under the collar and in my pants, for neglecting myself in this and for the dirty mind that keeps me sane, ooh that smell The Stench Of Defeat.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 204 ~It’s The Good Heat~

Without a doubt fear is the ultimate cold and have I always been this frozen in place, paralyzed, hard, wanting nothing more than soft, warm blankets, my cuddly dog, and a cup of hot cocoa when I’m not too lazy to get up. It’s The Good Heat

Sunday, January 21, 2018

Lesson 204 ~It’s The Good Heat~

To Will:
I Am Not Afraid Anymore, are you ever too lazy for fear, is that what this is or are you too busy trying to keep it in your pants; by the way, good job with that, definitely going on the list. Here’s the question though, what happened to your anger, your passion, and the weather is getting warmer, so you honestly have no excuse for being wrapped up indoors the way you have; yet another thing for the list of six impossible things.

Indeed Hell is not an impossible thing, and maybe I’m too blame with the forced censorship of she who will not be named, is that to blame also for this depression, that you are getting out of this week. Yeah, you’ll have quite an itinerary this week, and I’m sure you’ll be mad enough and man enough because you’re going back to the day job as well. What was that I just mentioned about Hell, that’s just it isn’t it, you can’t stand being cold and I don’t just mean physically but spiritually as well.

You have a heart in there someplace, I know it but what have we been using as fuel nowadays other than your own words and why are looking to hate more, feel lust, not that those are bad things considering where you are. Who was it that said, any place you never leave becomes a prison, and since you don’t feel the house is a home, home is where the heart is, and that’s always with the dog, but he might be a cellmate with your work and depression which isn’t a good thing. My point is you have to find other ways to stay warm without being wrapped up in the covers, hating some stupid bitch and the rest of the world, and porn binging.

Now while finding the Esther to your Benji might be too far I’m thinking that you honestly should start believing six impossible things before breakfast and so those six goals will be the following list:

1. I Will Keep It In My Pants, (Day 25 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
2. I Will Go Outside, Not Work Or Walmart, But Starbucks, Bookstore, Library
3. I Will Not Censor Myself
4. I Will Smart Off To Somebody At Work
5. I Will Focus More On The Dog And Actual Pretty Girls
6. I Will Work On My NaNoWriMo Novel

This list seems quite attainable doesn’t it and as I said this must become a thing if life is ever going to get better, take for example you won’t be crawling back under the covers today. Make the bed, eat something, take a shower, and you have four hours of work at the dining room table before you start reading.

Will it’s always time to do the right thing; okay, couldn’t say that with a straight face but as the song goes, get up, get out, and get something started; living, It’s The Good Heat.

I Will Have No Fear

Lesson 130 ~Heat Of The Moment~

What’s hot enough… the next time I fall so far it better be worth the trip to Hell, worth my damnation to be sure, but I can’t stand the heat, well not then anyway but what about now. Heat Of The Moment, is it hot in here or is it just… oh?

Wednesday, November 8, 2017

Lesson 130 ~Heat Of The Moment~

Forgive Me Echo,
No Fear because I believe I have told the story of November 5th a few times… *sigh* ok if I must sum up, this dirty old “PERV” fell for a young eighteen-year-old, “Senseless” and I wrote her one poem and put some Twilight quote I believe on her windshield. Needless to say, history repeated itself and I nearly got fired; haven’t you always wondered why they call it getting fired at all.

I read somewhere that they would burn a person’s home when they wanted them to leave the village, sort of like “The Leftovers” I suppose, When that happened that man was trying to be some sort of psychic and here I was masquerading as a man with a Lolita complex… she is legal thankfully, not that it helped my case any. One of these days Inspector Echo we are going to discuss that but let’s focus on a definition of let’s say going to Hell.

Hell is sitting in an office, having your sins in black and white laid out before you and wondering why it’s taking so long to go all Fahrenheit 451. It’s being so hot for a person one minute and then the fires… I don’t know how to explain it but it’s already a rule “Anger Burns Hotter Than Lust”. Inspector Echo, Hell is doing your best impression of Nero as you watch your “empire” burn all around you and what can you do but sit back and fiddle, is that what he was doing, trying to take his mind off everything that was happening then?

People then wonder why I’m so cold, because it’s a disease this thing called love, and I know how dangerous it can be, as it was said in “The Immortal”. Now I was never in love with her, people talk about a certain type of culture nowadays but honestly, I understand why I don’t go to strip club… other than my anxiety, I hate the tease, and porn is free.

Now you want to know am I sorry for what I did, not a day goes by that I don’t feel regret, and I have wrong a lot of women with my inaction, my shyness, my fear, and that makes me a monster. So yes I am sorry but you know Heat Of The Moment.

I Will Have No Fear

Vial Rage

Is it always fair to rage, I see fire and yet the heat it gives off threatens to burn me from the inside and whatever could douse it, sweat, blood, tears, ink, cannot extinguish such feelings. “Vial Rage”, I think I shall not rage

And I would call it a plague
how this fever infects
me, I sweat

summoning up the blood
which can never assuage
the disgust, the dirt, my name is mud.

Better though, tears for fears,
than this need to purge, to clear.
I lock the monster in its cage

the white walls of the page.
A mad world of ink,
kink, mystique, doublethink

Don’t rage, rage

Copyright © 2017, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Glowing Up Hot

I think it’s inevitable… the emotion and the feeling and I’m not saying you’ll keep it but for a moment you’ll see it, you’ll stand in awe, and whether good or bad in the end it will destroy you… love. You won’t be the same or I wasn’t Glowing Up Hot

And tomorrow is going to hurt
Makes you wonder what tonight is worth
If love is blind
Maybe for a few hours
Then the sun shines
or some great atomic power
Well… maybe just in time

Falls back down to earth
Because I was so sure
You were an angel… ain’t I right
My atom bomb baby
Only I’m not afraid of heights
But you’re Atomic Baby, pretty hot lady
I think I’ll find my way tonight

To you, somewhere on this Earth
Maybe I’ll convert
Become a follower of uranium rock
Catch the uranium fever
Yeah you’re so damn hot
Yes I’m a believer
That loving you, is what I got

I’m the lone wanderer in the desert
A wasteland freak and pervert
Something else to tell the truth
Just I don’t know how to stop
“I love you”
Is there a power greater than atomic?
Not if you love me like you do

If you’re mine, if you’re her
Tonight, tomorrow, someday, love hurts, and I’m on alert
Still I sit in my room, doomed
Alone… watching, love stories like world war three on pay TV
Until I see you again and my heart goes KABOOM!!!

Copyright © 2015 Second Circle Creations, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

Inspired by: Mia Rose, Louvin Brothers “Great Atomic Power”, Mary Robbins “Ain’t I Right”, Five Stars “Atom Bomb Baby”, Amos Milburn “Atomic Baby”, Warren Smith “Uranium Rock”, Elton Britt “Uranium Fever”, Smash Mouth “I’m a Believer” (The Monkees and Eddie Murphy) Shrek (2001), Sublime “What I Got”, Buchanan Brothers “There’s a Power Greater Than Atomic, Ellie Goulding “Love Me Like You Do” Fifty Shades of Grey Soundtrack, Nazareth “Love Hurts”, Crown City Four “Watch World War Three (On Pay TV)”, Lenny Kravitz “Again”, “CivilDefenseSpot” (YouTube) and a great many thanks to “Fallout 4”

See Me Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GVTuqebH0fc

Mia Rose (Glowing Up Hot)

The Word Next to Love

I like, I want, I need, but this isn’t about me or maybe it is because she always loves a different person not that I can blame her. Love… a word used much too often and for me much too soon. “The Word Next to Love”

So love LIVED next door

Why did I tell her?

 

I think Atlas dropped the world

And an angel found her feet

 

Put the blame on me, I’ll take the heat

It’s me, it’s not you

 

Who says love me like you do

To the last beautiful girl

 

Or the first one to rock my world

Not like love LIVED next door

 

Copyright © 2015 Second Circle Creations, Will A. Bradford Jr. All rights reserved.

 

Inspired by: Brittany Anne Pirtle – Emily… Power Rangers Samurai, Akon “Sorry, Blame It On Me”, Ellie Goulding “Love Me Like You Do” Fifty Shades of Grey Soundtrack, Matchbox Twenty “Last Beautiful Girl”, and Michael Jackson “You Rock My World”

 

See Me Here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O4nabT8XF6Y

Brittany Anne Pirtle - Emily… Power Rangers Samurai 008