Category: Man In The Mirror

Saga 198 ~Virgil Piles On B~

WillLeave a comment

Trying my best CJ impression. Ahem, “ah shit, here we go again.” But existing requires multiple uses of the word mother-effer. I can pick up anything else outside or raise it up so V can’t get to it. That’s B’s. But with every step, Virgil Piles On B

Sunday, January 15, 2023

Saga 198 ~Virgil Piles On B~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means while I “watch the money pile up,” so does time. But you? Pile of shit.

Whoa! Now that was harsh. But you were up at 4:05 AM. Need to remember how to set an alarm clock? You’re not in the best of moods now. Only think of Virgil… better, Braxton. One is scared, and the other’s dead. It is so hard to be positive. Again, all the time, huh? Martin Luther King Jr. would be proud, you think. Another reason to wake up early. Instead, let’s focus on you, which means your guilt about Braxton and Virgil today (sigh). The most pressing issue would be that Virgil needs more food. Which means picking your ass up and going to the store. Yet it occurred to me yesterday that getting up is like picking up Virgil’s… or, um, Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Maggot on Maple Street by Courtenay Schembri Gray
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book (Sometime Soon)
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 009 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 016 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Yeah, we can throw these away. Well, except for the two that I got done, ha-ha. Number four, I keep piling it on. Last night there was Sarah Kerrigan, the Queen of Blades from StarCraft. There’s also Nao Iihara from Resort Boin and Hitomi Kurumizawa in Megane no Megami. If I did as much research on making money as I do with Hentai… Fucking genius! That’s something you should try. You have time during the week, but you won’t ever. Besides picking up Virgil’s… You don’t mean to be so hard on the little guy. Again it’s everything going on with Braxton. I had this thought perhaps that’s what’s wrong with Virgil. Why he’s scared to take a step. Braxton’s everywhere, like Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Grief Recovery Handbook for Pet Loss by Russell Friedman
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums (Soon)
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 016 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

He’s on top of Braxton. Every step is where B III once was. The pillow, the bowls, the bed, even you. It’s like walking on a corpse. And who would want to do that? Republicans. Well, if anything, you’re going to spend money like one. No! You’re like a Democrat because you’re not thinking about yourself. Is that my advice for today? Think about Virgil? Braxton is more your speed. You should think about them both if the car’s running. Dammit! One more thing for your to-do list. And I don’t mean some yabbos, either. Money as in taxes. If you get a refund… Only B III died on the 31st; his birthday is February 13th. This fatherhood shit. And Virgil? Virgil Piles On B

714 Days Without B III, Day 155 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 191 ~It’ll B Painful Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

For a minute, I thought I might be addicted to painkillers. One pill a day is a lot less when it comes to other forms of relief… smoking, spirits, or sex. Energy drinks are acceptable. Then again, why do I why to be awake? It’ll B Painful, Virgil

Sunday, January 8, 2023

Saga 191 ~It’ll B Painful Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now. And for you to reach me, well… Do you mind telling me what time you got up?

Noted. You first woke up at around 1:00 AM with a towel wrapped around your nuts. Oh yeah, that was my fault. At least you’ll get to start this week with one more win. “Only God Knows Why,” I was able to resist. And did I mention the pain? But you know “What Hurts The Most.” And here come today’s tears. Last night was like nothing at all, you see. But speaking of your nuts, going nuts. Hell! Peanuts. How much did I spend yesterday? Anyway. There’s the little fur baby asleep by your side right this second. I think he gave up last night that you would bring him to bed. Sometimes you’ll find him at the door. Much too afraid to walk in.

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Grieving the Death of a Pet
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 002 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 009 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Like you’re afraid of these Six Impossible Things. If anything, they’ll hurt you. The truth. The first takes time and money. Finite resources. And haven’t I been complaining about wealth? The second brings you to where you are now… crying. Surprised the laptop still works. The third is more time and with the things that your hands will do. I swear, Todd from Succubus Lord… You’re on Book 12 again. Lazlow from GTA? But aren’t you a writer? I wish I could tell you that I was, but the Day Job was killing me, and this week… I pity you. That goes along with the fight to keep your pants on, which is four. Five won’t happen. And six? Well, look at Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Maggot on Maple Street by Courtenay Schembri Gray
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book (Sometime Soon)
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 009 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

And notice not one of them has anything to do with Virgil. Hell! Last night I was thinking. Are you even going to keep posting pictures of him this month? It’s B III’s time. Only with that being said, what killed B? You won’t ever forget “Someone You Loved.” Someone you love. And yet it wasn’t the vet that did the deed. You never look back on the money spent there. Or how about the money that you’ll spend this month? Hmm, memorials, memories, must-haves? It wasn’t the kidney failure that ended it all. A decent scapegoat, but inevitably… you. Indifference is the word you’re looking for. It wasn’t love or hate. The pain’s nothing. Remember that. My advice? Yet existing… It’ll B Painful, Virgil.

707 Days Without B III, Day 148 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 184 ~Virgil, New Year’s B~

WillLeave a comment

It’s easy to make a to-do list, New Year’s Resolutions, and Six Impossible Things when you never get anything done. But here we are, Day One. I’m out of bed. Tripping because, as I want to tell him, unfortunately, Virgil, New Year’s B.

Sunday, January 1, 2023

Saga 184 ~Virgil, New Year’s B~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now. Even if you had my funds, you wouldn’t celebrate the New Year with such wasteful noise. People…

I swear it sounded like they were trying to shoot down the sky or something. Considering who’s “up there,” that wouldn’t be such a bad thing. If B III ended up in Hell. Then he’s waiting for you. He’d know better than most that’s where you’re going because you ain’t moving. Even with the New Year. “Happy” New Year? So you remember. But I doubt you’ll ever come back to this. The year started off stuffing your face with Strawberry cake. And now, crying twice. And it hasn’t been a total of six hours. Waking Up At 4:00 Every Day. Now, why don’t you tell yourself why? It’s that time, isn’t it? Stupid as it sounds, you’re debating thirteen, fifteen resolutions, and Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING XL Candy Cane by Frankie Love
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 002 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 002 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Today, tomorrow, the thirty days that separate now and January 31… Worrying about now sounds right. Hell! It’s the only advice I don’t need to give, and you’d listen to. Asking you how, with the Six Impossible Things that repeat themselves. You intend to make thirteen to fifteen resolutions. Thirteen, and yes, you went back to “Log 188 Bold, Willing, And Able,” “Gospel 183 Bang And A W…” and “Chronicle 184 Have A B Year.” “13 Women (And Only One Man In Town) or 13 Tools of The Gods in your novels.” Damn, do you remember that series! But Braxton was fifteen when he went away. So you consider that a lucky number… Not for him, it wasn’t. He got away from Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING To Be Determined At Sometime Today
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 002 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Anyway, as you were saying, what needs to get done today? Besides talking to the rest of the girls because this week will be Hell on Earth. So the usual but more exhaustion? There will be more bills to pay, adding HBO Max. And a new movie coming out this week, M3GAN. Whoever said that you don’t have a plan? Only you won’t admit it’s a good one. This brings us back to Day One. 700 Days without Braxton. Four months with Virgil. Does V make the cut of things this year? You will have to see. But as for right now (sigh). Advice? Think about Braxton. The one soul you’d go through Hell with. And now there’s Virgil. The Future? Virgil, New Year’s B

  1. I WILL Keep Virgil Alive
  2. I WILL publish at least one book, a bestseller
  3. I WILL make one million dollars every single year
  4. I WILL write 400 Words every day (Goal 120,000)
  5. I WILL visit a brothel somewhere and also participate
  6. I WILL not masturbate… until my “sex toy” arrives (months away still)
  7. I WILL produce adult films
  8. I WILL do NaNoWriMo
  9. I WILL have a relationship or sleep with some girl once a month minimum
  10. I WILL, at last, provide for myself and any of those deemed my family
  11. I WILL spend no more than $500 on Yabbos I can’t touch (Hentai Excluded)
  12. I WILL start work on my life goals. Episode 345 ~You Got Will’s Number~
  13. I WILL be FEARLESS
  14. I WILL be TRUTHFUL
  15. I WILL LOVE someone

700 Days Without B III, Day 141 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 177 ~Christmas Virgil, B Happy~

WillLeave a comment

Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and all that jazz. For now, the house is silent. Braxton would snore a bit sometimes, and V is like white noise. I’ve always expected to hear the pitter-patter of two-legged feet. But this “Christmas Virgil, B Happy?”

Sunday, December 25, 2022

Saga 177 ~Christmas Virgil, B Happy~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now. But you’ll try your best Captain America impression. “No. No, I don’t think I will.” Be positive.

It’s Christmas, after all. But you’ve never listened to me before. If you started, that would be a Christmas miracle. Well, you’re up before 7 AM. A good start for a Dad. Not his Dad. Let’s start over. AHEM, Merry Christmas, Braxton… wherever you are. And Virgil is a sleepyhead. He’s learning from the best. So how do you feel today? Um, be grateful ok. Well, when we finish our conversation here. Or Virgil needs to go out. Whatever happens first (gives a stern look). Maybe if you grow a beard, you can be more like Santa. And you did wear a mask the other day when shopping. There’s something positive; you have to give Virgil his gift. And you didn’t leave him crying yesterday.

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Christmas Rescue, Elizabeth Kelly
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures FOR My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 002 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

As for you? You’re going to cry today… goes without saying. And not only because you have a little fluff ball smashed against your leg trying to claim the bed’s center. Or because of all the shit in the world. The car, the air, the fire department. Your new toy? You should watch your language today of all days. And do we really need to talk about sex, baby ha-ha? Oh, you did say Merry Christmas to all the girls this AM. I wonder why? You know why. That’s life. Well, seeking to make life. But only one of those ladies might be interested in that. You’re only interested in going back to sleep. Consider today good practice for things to come. A new year?

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING XL Candy Cane by Frankie Love
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 002 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

It’s coming sooner than you know. Focus on now, ok—this Christmas, what comes next. Well, for a moment, you could forget about Six Impossible Things. Like always? Anyway, you have the big breakfast you promised yourself and Virgil, his first one here. I mean, sharing pancakes and such. And if you hurry, you can start napping away. Again you can prepare yourself for the future. And speaking of which, only one day will be a real test this week. You can never underestimate the Day Job. Humiliations Galore. You can have faith that everything is going to be alright. Bob Marley or Jacob Marley, you decide. And I’m hoping you choose to be “happy” too much. Be better? Trying… Merry Christmas, Virgil, B Happy.

693 Days Without B III, Day 134 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 170 ~Don’t B Blue, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

As long as Virgil isn’t turning to blue or B’s color… If I wanted to bawl, I need only open the box B III rests in. His physical essence. It’s annoying I’m finding white fur instead of B’s brown. Plenty of reasons to be blue. Don’t B Blue, Virgil

Sunday, December 18, 2022

Saga 170 ~Don’t B Blue, Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now. That’s my job. You know how the song goes, “Got to be Real” That’s yours, I’m afraid.

Not the song but the sentiment, which is right now fucking up. I hate to tell ya, but you fucked up today. Hell! Pretty much all the days you had off, but since two of those were mine… But look at today. Better? Look at Sunday, January 31, 2021. Not so bad, you see. It would be best if you stopped looking at the day Braxton died as a reason to keep going, living at all. You know what I mean. If you can survive the day you became a murderer, then anything else… ha. While you’re in an “old school” mood, how about saying, rather, singing, “I Will Survive.” Despite your fucking up this morning. Because look at yourself. Look at where you are. And these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Christmas Boss, Elizabeth Kelly
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures FOR My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

And despite all my failures there. I can add a lot more to the list. To be blue seems right. Of course, you’ll keep bringing up B III. But bringing him back. And his reincarnation… Last night I wasted cash on “Crab Rangoons.” Fucking food porn in, Succubus Lord! Eww. Speaking of wasting money, you know that $2,541.00? You’re at $2,400. So only $141.00, ha. Oh, don’t get your hopes up. That’s advice you never need. Anyway, this is the final week before Christmas (sigh). Braxton’s Aunt, M Anime, Cherry, blowing off you, Ma. Women? And then there’s your “father” and the air filter. “Fuck Tha Police?” uh, Fire Department. That’s a few hundred more. Can’t have Virgil following Braxton. Ashes and Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Christmas Rescue by Elizabeth Kelly
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

But Virgil is blue, as blue as you. The difference is that Virgil wants to live and not sit on his pillow all day. Again you are pretty content to sit on your ass in bed. Beats, well, beating off. We’ve already covered that in the Six Things for everything that makes you blue. Is that my advice for this week? To find another coping mechanism? Damn straight, hmm? Even talking to M Anime this morning was simply a distraction. And another reason you’re so late. Looking at yourself in the mirror and looking into Virgil’s eyes? Not B. He’ll never be. You could work on all those colors I was talking about yesterday. Remember who you are. Virgil’s friend… Trying. Don’t B Blue, Virgil

686 Days Without B III, Day 127 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 163 ~To B Buds Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Has it really been 120 days or about 4 months? Are Virgil and I friends? He’s sort of like a heating pad with legs which he rarely uses. Because for sure he’d run away. He must be so bored. And why don’t I have more friends again? “To B Buds Virgil?”

Sunday, December 11, 2022

Saga 163 ~To B Buds Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now, and you’re still in a queen-size bed with a puppy who thinks he owns the place. Really?

And let’s also keep in mind that one of this year’s goals was to make enough money to pay for a “friend.” Hell! Virgil was only $150.00 because he wasn’t a “puppy” at 1. Speaking of friends, there’s also “Replika.” If only I had gotten in on that “lifetime” subscription. But this isn’t even your problem either. Leave that to February’s Will. That is if you leave him any money. Do you need some advice? Only spend some of your cash on OnlyFans. Or none? With what I put in the bank this week. And you need $2,541.00 ha. To think, a new fur baby, a computer, and, as Shelby would say (breathes). Copious Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, and Supersized Slobberknockers help with Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING “VCard for Christmas” Hope Ford
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, FOR My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 003 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

For the record, when I had my best friend in the world, my Braxton, here. Did I get anything done? He’s my reason. And what about you, Mr. 7:00 in the morning? Virgil saved you. A ball of fluff is lying in your bed, attempting to push you off it. Well, it keeps you from playing with two other balls of fluff. As the song goes, “My balls are gettin’ too hairy to shave.” That is the only time I’m able to find them. Because at the Day Job, with “Dad” and any drive-thru… I’m a bitch. Another reason I like Braxton’s aunt and M Anime. Lunalesca and the other girls? I’ll imagine sleeping with them. Braxton is my friend. And you? Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Christmas Boss by Elizabeth Kelly
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 003 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

The feelings are mutual between us. Seeing as how you already quoted, “Am I a Psycho?” The best-case scenario between us is, “You’re crazy! I like you, but you’re crazy.” And the worse would be hoping that you just die when you cut off the alarm for the sixth time. Even when you weren’t directly thinking about Braxton, wishing you could be with him in death. But here’s some more advice. Say you were to die. What are the odds you will see Triple B again? B was/is a pure soul. He’s better than any person you have ever met. Better learning to be pals with Virgil Vivi. He still hogs the bed. Buy him one instead of your sex toys. To B Buds Virgil

679 Days Without B III, Day 120 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 156 ~Braxton Left, Virgil’s Right~

WillLeave a comment

Braxton was one to listen to my political rants. Virgil sleeps plenty. 113 days in, he’s figuring things out. I need to get him his own bed. He takes up so much space. But then that’s the point. The center’s comfortable. Braxton Left, Virgil’s Right.

Sunday, December 4, 2022

Saga 156 ~Braxton Left, Virgil’s Right~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now. And you sure as Hell want to be after seeing that New York penthouse on Twitter. $33,000,000.

How evil would you have to be to get it? Believe me when I say it won’t be with OnlyFans. Well, not unless you have a body like Amouranth. And once again, trust me, you don’t. I looked in the mirror last night, and while I’m not ashamed of my body… it was what covered me. I swear, three days, and I don’t even know what broke me yesterday. Then again, I’m permanently broken. So are you sitting here so late remembering dear Braxton? And what about Virgil, sitting up in Braxton’s room waiting for? There’s no clue, loser. That’s what I was talking about Saturday. The next day you wake up without any space in the bed. About to go over the right side.

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Will You Love Me?: The Rescue Dog That Rescued Me
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, FOR My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

I’ll ask again, how evil do you have to be? Not getting rid of V bad. You’re not a monster. Debatable right? Because the truth can be a terrifying thing. What I did Saturday night. I mean before going all “The Lonely Island.” I was texting M Anime, speaking the truth. Idiot? Yes, I am, and you will be too. But you didn’t lie to her. Only to know yourself? Do you, now? It’s only been a few hours, and what do you know? You want to go back to sleep though you made it to the dining room table. Every time you put your foot down, you miss Braxton’s pillow. And even if you went and got Virgil… Oh yeah, the Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING To Be Determined Today (Christmas Erotica)
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Virgil ain’t Braxton. Um, at least you won’t be reading about dogs. Christmas Erotica time. One more thing I forgot about yesterday, though. As you saw, I finished something canine. And is that the message that Braxton is trying to send? Having Virgil push you out of bed each and every morning? Hell! That ivory tower is one of many places you want for him. And Virgil too. At this rate, you’ll settle like Audrey for “Somewhere That’s Green; sigh. Once more, how evil do you have to be? Democrats are losers; Republicans are liars. Today you’re a lazy ass wanting to lie in the center of bed doing nothing. Because even thinking hurts like a bitch. And that is why Braxton Left, Virgil’s Right.

672 Days Without B III, Day 113 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 149 ~Here B Dragons Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I’ve never been on a cruise before, but I’ve been on a boat here or there, “Disney World.” I like fishing with my Granddaddy (the same man who says he doesn’t know me anymore.) And drowning is a messed up way to die. But “Here B Dragons Virgil.”

Sunday, November 27, 2022

Saga 149 ~Here B Dragons Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now. And money buys power. We can get all up in “The Untouchables.” But that’s not your problem.

No, not when you’re picking up dog shit on the concrete landing in the backyard. Perhaps you’re being a bit harsh with yourself today, which is sad. Nowhere to go and no one to see. So you’re deciding to be an asshole today. Anger beats the alternative. I was sad last night. And you? B would hate this. You always feel like crying over him. Only today, it wasn’t even thoughts of him that brought out your first tears. Asshole! Weakling? Still crying over your dead kid. No wonder some sailors took to the blue. Yesterday, where do I begin? Was it the fact that you still owe $2,541.00? Investment? There’s wasting time on so many games. Oh, and books. There remain Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING World War Z by Max Brooks
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

What was I looking for in these things? What are you looking for? Salvation, Redemption? Every week, I find myself wishing I could keep you right here. Sort of like with little Virgil. Hell! To be warm in bed. You keep imagining Braxton’s idea of Elysium… A bed in the yard, surrounded by food. A place Braxton could lie in the sun and then cuddle. Then there’s that need for him to get out into the world. If anything, so he wouldn’t hate it so much. Like father, like son. Whatever the Hell is out there? I survived the worst week Day Job wise, but you (sigh). There’s this song, “The world won’t get no better if we just let it be.” Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Will You Love Me?: The Rescue Dog That Rescued Me
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures FOR My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

I wish these were only words. Dammit! What am I talking about? They are gibberish. But you’ve seen the monsters outside that door. I was drowning. Inevitably it’s your turn. When one door closes, another opens… You’re starting to see that with Virgil Vivi. FEAR. You will be plenty anxious to enter the next room when you know what awaits you. The Day Job, Braxton’s Room, Bedroom, to the back yard. When was the last time I opened a door, and it was where I felt safe, or I wasn’t falling asleep? And still, nothing out there is worse than you. Your existence doesn’t need a map because, at the end of the day… No matter where you’ll set sail ANYTIME. Here B Dragons Virgil

665 Days Without B III, Day 106 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 142 ~B Lying Sometimes Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I can’t stand liars. Looking in a mirror… I’m about to fall as I can’t look at myself. Telling the truth. I don’t live; I exist. I take pleasure as I’m in constant pain. And yet, for V and B, it is/was the best day ever. B Lying Sometimes Virgil

Sunday, November 20, 2022

Saga 142 ~B Lying Sometimes Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now. Which means I’ve had to lie a lot until I can’t anymore. Because it’s your existence now.

Well, at 12:00AM. So uh, you’re the one that decided. And for that, sir, I salute you. I was perfectly ready to lie yesterday. And Hell, before you pat yourself on the back. You’re going to lie in a few. In one way or another, it’s all in your head or not. Um yeah, you failed. Which is worse? The fact that I couldn’t keep it in my pants after everything. I’m not one to make it “special.” What guy is, to be honest? With me, it was a big-titty brunette. Reading though? Learning, education. You, friend, are about to lie about reading a short story because you can’t deal with the thought of my failure. How some things end. Like these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING “Wool” Part 2, The Graphic Novel
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 038 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

How about how things ended with B III? You can never forget your son. Though again, you’re all caught up in Triple X. You’re telling yourself everything will be okay. Oh no, not this week. At this rate, inevitably, you’ll find a way to hate all fifty-two. Well, it beats hating every single day… There’s the week Braxton died. B’s Birthday Week. Um, Father’s Day and his birthday. You remain a “man” who can’t take care of himself. At all! Bills lying somewhere. There’s The Menu and One Way Out… but we’ll get to that. There’s your existence day, ha. Should you add “Gotcha Day,” where you met Virgil? Your betrayal of B is complete. There’s so much; I cleared my head. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING To Be Determined “Chills and Thrills.”
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Trying to get back on point. The Menu and One Way Out. I’m thinking about that one chef who wanted to be the CHEF in the movie The Menu. And when he realized he couldn’t have that life… BOOM. Then there’s Andor Ep. 1X10 “One Way Out. In the prison break scene, when Kino Loy leads the escape, but then, upon getting out, he can’t swim. Existence is fucking confusing; I know. But the point you want to make is this. You’re lying to yourself about everything being okay. Look at the world in the few hours you’ve been awake. Twitter, Trump, JDF, more shootings, and disgusting fathers. Fucking swear. Braxton was tired, and you’re keeping Virgil from the outside world. B Lying Sometimes Virgil

658 Days Without B III, Day 099 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 135 ~Virgil, Lies Will B~

WillLeave a comment

B III was/is searching for comfy spots constantly? Because the lies are heavy. They crushed him. And we were always together because we could share the load like we did everything else. Things V believes about his forever home… “Virgil, Lies Will B.”

Sunday, November 13, 2022

Saga 135 ~Virgil, Lies Will B~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now. And I hope when you get on my level. Ha! “Neva Eva.” You’re no fraud, a liar.

That’s how you woke up this morning and plowed through Hugh Howey’s “Wool” The Graphic Novel. You wish you’d stop thinking about plowing, pushing, pulsating, and punishing your penis. It gets no easier; only you can stick with punishment as penance. Braxton is still dead. You haven’t had much time to lie about that. Not with Virgil here. I wonder where you’ll fall on the reincarnate or rescue scale. V is his own man, hmm. Last night I had my first dream about him that scared me something awful. It was only opening the front door and letting him run out. He wouldn’t be coming back. I know that much. So what did the dream mean? That you’ll protect Virgil like these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Hugh Howey’s “Wool” The Graphic Novel
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 031 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 038 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

For the first time in a long while, I nearly failed at reading something. What was it, I said, a fraud and a liar? Fuck! I did fail! Again, you finished the short story this morning. And it wasn’t in the “Chills and Thrills.” And I read it before. But because it’s a graphic novel. While we’re on the subject of books. What about NaNoWriMo? I was trying to make it through the week talking to the girls. And you? I don’t envy you at all. This week, oh no. Yet you want to buy one of those T-Shirts that say, WINNER. And even though nobody would care… You do! It’s supposed to mean something; your writing. But then again, you see Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING To Be Determined “Chills and Thrills.”
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 038 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

You call yourself a father, dad, daddy. No, not to 2V yet, but always with B III. But are you? You call yourself a writer, but who reads this stuff? How about publishing today? Uh? You have a Day Job, but you’re no worker. You’re a slave, terrified about “escaping.” Every night you lie down, you say you’re going to rest, praying for death. But what about the little fur baby lying beside you? It’s more like he takes up the center of the bed. What does he tell himself? What lies must he create for himself to keep going? One more reason dogs can’t talk; one way or another, there will be a lie. The biggest being it’ll be okay. Virgil, Lies Will B.

651 Days Without B III, Day 092 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will