No, I can’t stop; whatever this is? Whether adding another 300 words to a nightmare, someone told me about. Or no, I don’t want to go to work. I don’t work tomorrow. Or no, we are less free now. And Braxton coming back. That’ll B No, Virgil
Thursday, July 4, 2024
Meditation 003 ~That’ll B No, Virgil~
1250 Days Without B III, Day 691 of Virgil’s Arrival
Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I’m sure your Heaven wouldn’t include fireworks. Or your Hell. I’ve been reading about Cerbie.
You know, as in Cerberus. And what about Virgil? Hell, what about you, Braxton? Sigh…
Love is a long, long road. My boys, my books, and some girl’s boo… Yabbos. This week has had plenty. And here we are… Uh, more like, here I am, B III. This Independence Day…
Well, at least you have your freedom. And what about mine? I always figured as I was getting kinda used to being someone you loved. Yes, I know you still do from wherever you are. Anyway, you were supposed to be my apocalypse survivor buddy. And if E-Day doesn’t end me… Eww! I’ll have bigger fish to fry. Are you still wondering why I would rather join you, Braxton, with everything happening? This Is America.
Yeah! There are better places to be right now. But there are also much worse. And no, I don’t want to talk about me. You see it all, don’t you? And Virgil has to live it. Poor little Virgil, B.
Only I’m too busy saying NO to everything, like being a good dad, for starters. Braxton, I’m trying to stop speaking so badly about myself. And Virgil… One of the first words out of my mouth today was, no. He was outside for twenty minutes and still decided to use the training pad. Maybe if I wasn’t saying no to trying to clean the backyard. But again, this week was hard. Look at my paycheck from last week… Twenty-Eight dollars.
And what did I do?
I said no to more hours at the Day Job. Why? Because I’m so busy trying to be a writer?
I said no to OnlyFans. So what am I on… Day Three. It’s not that you need to know that.
But it’s surprising because I said no to ignoring M Anime’s nightmare. She wrote around 1000 words. And I’m approaching 2400 words in my rewrites and edits. A horror story
No means no, but you know me and dark stories. And what could be darker than the ones involving burying fur buddies? I’ve been saying no to reading those, too. And I say, “No, I won’t give up my grief.” But no, I can’t join you either. Living? Tell me why? That’ll B No, Virgil
“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)
Always and Forever,
Your Dad