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Saga 327 ~Braxton’s Fine Print Virgil~

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I’m not being the person B thinks I am. And he was/is my best friend. But what about “friends,” influencers, and the “Girl All the Bad Guys Want?” I should read up on copyrights, complaints, and charges… “Gulp.” Braxton’s Fine Print Virgil.

Wednesday, May 24, 2023

Saga 327 ~Braxton’s Fine Print Virgil~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now. Which means I can talk my way out of contracts. The Terms and Conditions. Basic Morality.

So when did I sign up to be a father? No! Not only a Dad but Braxton’s. Being B’s Daddy. I still think of myself as that… “Sorry, Virgil?” Only that means I take everything that comes with it. And I keep saying it, Inspector, despite you and my “Lost Boy.” It is my truth. As the song goes, “I don’t wanna be a murderer.” I have, though, Inspector Echo. Hell! While I’m busy busting out the Rhianna, “Every time I walk out the door. I see him die a little more inside.” Now that would be Virgil. With him, there came actual paperwork. But I never saw anything about “Love and Happiness.” Inspector, seriously. It’s my effing ear, which is why there’s music galore.

Not music that I have stolen, mind you. But I’ve done that too. Today that’s the least of my problems. As I’m not MJ or the GOP. A smooth criminal. No, I’m an internet fiend. Calling me a troll is more appropriate. What about an F-Boy? Effing fiend sounds better. And all because I didn’t read the fine print. Inspector, I’m thinking of my stupidity. Horniness makes men stupid. And I dare to call myself a man. Inspector Echo, please! Now I could go into the political aspect of this, but I’m not confused at all. I’m a Heterosexual African American male. Yeah, make it easy on Law Enforcement, Inspector. Although I’m sure, all those I’ve hurt would wish death upon me. Die, just die!

Yes, I sound like Whitley’s mother from A Different World. And isn’t that what this is now? Friend? Are you my friend Inspector Echo? Because if you were, I could tell. Confess! Is there no fine print between us? Effing is ha! I’m sure it is somewhere, Inspector. Now speaking of the blog. How much was there to read, getting someone fixing it, Inspector? There will be more if I go to the doctor’s office to get my ear cleared out; I know it. Bukkake of the ear! More like what my dick’s been doing after “The Pic Phenomenon.” That’s what I’m still worrying about. Thursday, May 18, 2023. Not even a whole week. I am reading the fine print of existence. You’re effed, Will. “JSS” Braxton’s Fine Print Virgil

843 Days Without B III, Day 284 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 326 ~Trust Me V… Braxton~

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Have I ever been cheated on… uh? Have I ever cheated? Flirted. The only thing that has cheated someone out of all of me? The goodest boy, my grief, giving people a reason not to trust me. Am I Aladdin, Jesus, or the government? “Trust Me V… Braxton.”

Tuesday, May 23, 2023

Saga 326 ~Trust Me V… Braxton~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now but what about the other stuff? Mind, body, and soul… This should be a given, hmm?

As a friend, father, effing buddy for life… Isn’t that called being a husband? Family? Braxton’s my only reliable reference. And he won’t be saying much out loud, my love. What about Virgil? He’s been here 283 days. I know where his problem lies. TRUST. Virgil is right? Since “The Pic Phenomenon,” I can’t say I trust myself. Did I ever? If it ain’t music, it’s movies, so allow me my Nic Cage as Cameron Poe moment… “There’s only two men I trust. One of them’s me. The other’s not you.” The other guy… B III. Braxton knows everything about me. Well, now he does, wherever he is now. I’m sorry. Love, I trust you now. Again, “It’s me, hi, I’m the problem, it’s me.”

You would have figured I’d learn my lesson. My son couldn’t trust me to save his life, love. I effing tried! And here come the waterworks. He trusted me, and I failed my boy. Every single day I fail myself. I wake up, hit the alarm, and WHAM! One more day failed, and so to all the rest… “You cannot hurt me,” I want to scream! Of course, anyone can; trust. And who am I in the grand scheme of things? How badly I want anonymity. This is the very thing I took. Though I meant no animosity. But for this anomaly in my moral code. Desire is desire. But would I break our trust for it? I did his, theirs, and as always mine.

How dare I ask you to trust me again, and with what? That “Whenever you call me, I’ll be there.” When I’m not thinking about Thursday, May 18, 2023? Let’s say Sunday, August 13, 2023. Virgil’s “Gotcha Day.” How many days I’ve believed my last? Happiness? Do you trust me to find my happiness? The love? I haven’t had that since a birthday I had. And I was pretty young. “What the Hell is going on?” I’m sure people will ask, “With all these things that I’ve done.” Did I feel good doing them? Yes. Am I guilty, my love? Yes. Gross? Sure. Being a “man.” But for you, our younglings… Yo Braxton, you there? And even Virgil and them. Trying! Trust Me V… Braxton

842 Days Without B III, Day 283 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 320 ~ I’ll B Listening, Virgil~

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I’m listening to everything but B, and why? Because I’m not being the person, he thinks I am. He would give me one of his looks. And V’s in B’s room now because… Hell! At least he ain’t crying. I got no money to go anywhere. I’ll B Listening, Virgil.

Wednesday, May 17, 2023

Saga 320 ~ I’ll B Listening, Virgil~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now; this means I don’t have to listen to anybody or anything. The sound of EFFING silence!

Which is in my head right now because I don’t remember how this particular subject came up. I was at the Day Job “Dancing With Myself…” Please! Talking to myself. Anyway, Inspector, I was saying the saddest sound I ever heard was… then I blank. Inspector, do you want to know what the most horrific, helpless, heartbreaking sound is? B III. My son taking his last breath in this world right after. And right afterward, the vet told me, “He’s Gone.” Braxton’s heart, head, and happiness. Oh, I knew, I heard. And then the quiet. Next to that Inspector comes my first breath. No wonder I’m starting to hate meditation. Tuesday, Balance said, think of someone you have a “bad” relationship with. It’s me, hi.

But I was thinking of the ASM at the Day Job. You know how much I hate being laughed at. Next to that, the silence rears its head once again. My effing smile Echo. Disgusting. Why do I want to learn to kill zombies but love Necromancy? Killing the comedian. Inspector, I should kill the beggar as well. Again at the Day Job, when such and such a guy shows up, what do I start doing? Begging, beseeching, and bitching for his help Echo. I hate whining, kowtowing, and bending the knee. What kind of a man are you? Inspector, that’s something Suzy Lu asked. Well, not to me. YouTube is blaring in the background. Books, and lying alone in bed. Bitches, Man… Warm Bodies

I both want to and not. You know to listen to another woman. The worst sound in the world is the alarm clock blaring. Now I can say that for plenty of reasons but today. Inspector, I set it for midnight. That means again I restart another No FAPPING pledge. I hate the push of a button. Because, let’s say, seven out of ten times, it’s all about a porno. Hell! Inspector, I’m still listening to Succubus Lord yet again. And like I told one of the girls. I recall going to the barbershop with a folder full of bikini models. Why did I dare? Then there’s my moaning. Thinking, “Oh God, I’m gonna die alone.” Should listen to “my boys.” I’ll B Listening, Virgil

836 Days Without B III, Day 277 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 319 ~Braxton’s Mom Before Virgil’s~

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I wasn’t a good man when Braxton was here. But I was far better than now. Listening to audiobooks. Todd discusses the difference between an orgy and a gangbang. Surprised I don’t have a wife yet. I Wish B had met her. “Braxton’s Mom Before Virgil’s.”

Tuesday, May 16, 2023

Saga 319 ~Braxton’s Mom Before Virgil’s~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now but before… Well, I was a different “man.” I’d even say less of one. Being honest

And not fair at all. If anything, I don’t want to go sounding like the GOP. But I have always been one for the Nuclear family unit. Two parents and 2.5 kids. Half? Please, Braxton! Yeah, if you don’t know by now and you do. You being you. I had to find a woman that got me. Anyway, Braxton was/is my whole world. Only this world got a lot bigger. Today marks 835 days without my firstborn son. My Braxton. How I wish you could have met him. Would it be easier? Me being a single father. Hell! Should I even say it like that? And today of all days? I’m time traveling. So it’s Sunday, May 14, 2023. How about it’s Mother’s Day? Hmm?

I wish I could say I’ve been busier. You are the mother of all our beautiful children. I did say 2.5. Right? With all the money we have… I want a lot. Fatherhood and manhood. And speaking of things I should stop thinking… My GOP ideology. But I have money. Or is it my father’s? Money equals love. Has he ever felt that? Unconditional love… I wished my Ma a Happy Mother’s Day, and she would beat my ass thinking of my Old Man as such. Only I look at what I’m asking of you. Well, that I’m hoping you’ll feel. Braxton. A love for the furry son you’ve never met, and here I have Virgil Vivi amongst all our two-legged children. “What is Love?”

I shouldn’t have to ask that, and I don’t. At least not when it comes to me pouring the Bisquick and you making pancakes. I do mean the kids that we made together. “My Love.” But why do you think I call B pancake? He couldn’t haven’t been more mine. Braxton, He’s My Son. He will always be. I sing, “Nothing’s gonna change my world.” But the “man” I am, and the woman I hold you to be… To love Braxton as I do. Virgil? I don’t have favorites when it comes to our children. Friend, favorite parent, a father. Love my Braxton. Love our kids, love me, and love Virgil. Could you love the man I was, where you were Braxton’s Mom Before Virgil’s?

835 Days Without B III, Day 276 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 313 ~Lying Around B, Virgil~

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I both love and hate lying around? You know I love my naps. There are those two minutes I give myself calling to Braxton… He might come running for “medicine time?” Then realizing existing is a waste, and what I did last night… Lying Around B, Virgil

Wednesday, May 10, 2023

Saga 313 ~Lying Around B, Virgil~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now. Which means I could give a masterclass in lying. I feel like “kaka,” to be honest…

Because… I hate lying. Don’t get me wrong, Inspector. I lie a lot. Nine times out of ten, it saves “my” ass. No wonder I haven’t joined B III. “It’s in my biological imperative.” Eugene Porter was a terrific liar too. But I couldn’t lie to Braxton. Lying, Inspector. Because… I told him he was going to be ok. I would protect him, save him, and in the end. I can’t say I meant to go this way. But when I do something awful and then lie about it. Inspector, in full transparency, today is Monday, May 1, 2023. And yesterday, I effed up. I wish Braxton were here. Of course, in the manner in which I effed up. Braxton would be on punishment… time-out.

And Virgil. Hell! When was his last walk? Now that’s effing dark to say, Inspector. Usually, all we do is lie around anyway. Not today. Oh, don’t get me wrong, I’m effing tired. Worse, I’m effing horny. So much so that I’ll end up spending more money. Then what, Inspector? I’ll have the perfect excuse to stay in bed. Where can I go being broke? Not so broke as to give into every kink and fetish. Last night when I fucked up, I didn’t buy the book The 120 Days of Sodom. I read the reviews. Strangely Cherry reminded me. She wrote a tale that’s a bit out there for me. Do you want to know a secret, straight-up fact? SCAT IS A HARD LIMIT!

It’s hard enough picking up B and V’s… business. Yet I want two-legged children, ha-ha. Now that’s not a lie. No! Inspector, I want to do a particular brand of lying today, as with most days. I want to lie down and wake up with my boy. I pray for that… well I think about it anyway. You know how I feel about The Almighty, Inspector, whatever. At the moment, I want to lie down and go to sleep like I should have done last night. All I’ll confess to right now is AHEM, The Savior’s Wife… OnlyFans. Inspector, I effed up. Finally, I wouldn’t mind effing some P.Y.T. I’ll never say no to that. Love, Losing, Lying… Three little words. Lying Around B, Virgil

829 Days Without B III, Day 270 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 312 ~Braxton Would Cheat, Virgil~

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Braxton couldn’t cheat death; none of us can. On people, pay, and pleasures. I’ve never been one for Love and Happiness. But I am Hopelessly Devoted to You… if your name is grief or a specific pleasure. Cheater? Braxton Would Cheat, Virgil.

Tuesday, May 9, 2023

Saga 312 ~Braxton Would Cheat, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now. But I wouldn’t even need that to be my old man. He cheated on my Ma.

Yeah, this ain’t the week for this. Right? And this was a long time ago. I have a half-brother I’ve never met, around college age. No love there. Love and time, isn’t that right, love? Other than being a provider, I don’t want to be anything like my “father.” Never. Cheating, though? I was thinking about that Sunday, May 7, 2023. Not like that… Please! I have many views on such, but I’m not talking about love. Love. No, the other love. My B III. How often have I said Virgil’s name today compared to B’s? Uh, Good Morning. Hell! Even before you, there was Braxton. Then us… And with Virgil Vivi, there was, “V, you need a bath? I’ll take you to get one.”

It’s all that walking in the yard. At some point, it’s going to get mowed. Such a little thing, a husband mowing the lawn. I was raised on TRADITION! Fiddler on the Roof, I’m sorry. Not for the singing. Nope! That’s always been me. Pop Culture Whore… We’ll get there. I mean for cheating on life, not you, my wife but life with death. Oh, I’m in love with it. The only reason to wake up is that I move a bit closer to it. Step by Step… more music? Yeah. Ma was a big fan of The Preacher’s Wife and Whitney Houston. I remember. Anyway, I have to get her something for Mother’s Day. And you as well. A mom to such beautiful children.

I’ll forever be grateful that they take after you and not me. Do I feel cheated? Not at all, love. Now, Braxton, I swear I think he was in love with Aunt Carolina. Those boobies? Someday, I won’t be so juvenile when it comes to those. Oh, like one day I won’t think about B? That’s like telling me not to think about sex ever. Ask Cherry about that, ha-ha. It’s like me wanting to have a threesome or thoughts of us becoming “Swingers,” right? I mean, not now. And I’m not a cheat. Not with you, and again there’s B, but here is V. Like the song, Is This Love? Could You Be Loved? Braxton’s big heart. Mine’s broken. Death. Braxton Would Cheat, Virgil

828 Days Without B III, Day 269 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 306 ~B We Trust, Virgil~

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I told B III everything. I had to give him “The Talk.” Regarding his “Aunt Carolina.” Like father, like son. The internet made things easier with books and… umm, beauty. I swear to keep track. And Virgil? Do I trust him? Did Dante? B We Trust, Virgil

Wednesday, May 3, 2023

Saga 306 ~B We Trust, Virgil~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now. Only I will take a Handy Dandy notebook over a portfolio any day of the week.

Speaking of which, I am continuing to time travel. Today is Saturday, April 29, 2023. Inspector, I can say I’ve been somewhat productive. I’ll lose more money on the 30th. Today, ha! I have a plethora of books to buy. I’m slightly pissed that I didn’t do it this morning. And before that, I said I’d do it last night. Then again… (sigh) listing excuses? That comes later. For now, let’s talk about books. Or how about the fact that I like Kindle? That’s Kindle and not Kendall, aka Professor Kelsey Williams… Sandra McCoy. Geez! Inspector if could make a list of distractions and/or women that get me hard. Anyway, I wanted to talk about that, to be fair. But hiding behind so many books.

Again better books than boobs. “This Is America.” Better books than bullets. My sin Echo. I bathe in Lust, not Violence (2nd and 7th Circles of Hell). Of course, that’s if I forget B III. I’m getting the 9th Circle for sure for what I did to my B. But not today. I’m still breathing. And with a father like mine… though, I couldn’t blame him if he kicked my ass for this one, to be honest. When We Were Young? When You Were Young. Hell! I’m a boy now. And as I sat in the barbershop today, I remembered when I had a folder of Jet and Ebony models. What the eff was I thinking when I was with “my” father and that folder.

Was I looking to die on that day? That’s another list I need to make. All the times I could have died. The only reason I’m glad I failed? It’s because, of course, I got to meet my little B. My son. Happy Memories? Inspector, how many times must I say it? I’m never Happy. Inspector, I haven’t been happy since I had my seventh birthday. What the Hell? Please! Those were the words that ended my happiness. However, there was a glimpse in 2002. Inspector, what was I supposed to say today? I wanted to write out all the chicks. So I could keep my pants on until later. Tell you the things I couldn’t tell Braxton. But trusting myself? B We Trust, Virgil

822 Days Without B III, Day 263 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 305 ~Meditations Of B, Virgil~

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So what did I expect from meditation? Once upon a time, B’s breathing was life. The awareness of him. Then the silence. Virgil breathes too. But he doesn’t make a peep unless I leave. And what about the family I want someday? Meditations Of B, Virgil

Tuesday, May 2, 2023

Saga 305 ~Meditations Of B, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now. That goes to show I’m not a great man. Nowhere near. Neither peaceful, as perverted, promising

Not like Marcus Aurelius. Hell! I don’t know anything about him. (Snickers) I did watch Gladiator… The four chief virtues: Wisdom, justice, fortitude, and temperance… Speaking of royalty. There is Queen Ramonda of Wakanda. “What construct does your mind create when you think of your (son)? Does it bring you comfort or torment?” Dicking around as I mourn my son. Not even watching the films but the movie reactions, love. And why not? My last meditations haven’t yielded anything. How long has it been, hmm? Braxton’s been dead for 821 days. So Virgil’s been here 262. You meant meditating. Right? At this rate, 31 days? But today, Friday, April 28, 2023, all I have done… I’ve cut on YouTube and watched fictional and/or better people.

Yes, I know Marcus Aurelius is real. I need to read Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. Braxton may have led me to such a book. One more book I need to read. It’s either this or Succubus 8 (Riddles And Revenge). I could go with MEAT by Joseph D’Lacey. I’ve been meaning to get into the works of Matt Shaw. And I told Lady Sophia about The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes. What’s one more title about dead fur babies? Moaning, grieving. Again, it’s Friday, so I’m in a literary state of mind despite Braxton’s passing. Always. Plus, books are a form of meditation for me. Better to spend money on books than on women’s mammaries. I have you, my beautiful wife, and my business. Happy?

You know me, baby girl. I’m never happy… Effing said that out loud? Happiness… Honestly. As the song goes, “I Believe in a Thing Called Love.” And “I Believe in You and Me.” Shouldn’t I say I believe in the “Power of Love?” I believe in the power of music. Better yet, I “Believe in the Beat.” Whatever I can stick in my ears short of seeing the Doc again. The last thing I need is my ear shooting another bukkake scene. Ha-ha! But what’s the first thing I need? I can’t have my Braxton back. And meditating… Awareness and silence it’s confusing. I have no wise words for you or our children. Only I love you. That enough? Braxton’s wisdom? Meditations Of B, Virgil

821 Days Without B III, Day 262 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 299 ~B It Goodbye Virgil~

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Hell! I wrote a letter to Satan once. No, I don’t mean Santa. I said bye to him when I said goodbye to the church. My worst goodbye? That’s my son, and when I wake up. “God gave me everything I want?” My boy, brains, balls? Nope… B It Goodbye Virgil.

Wednesday, April 26, 2023

Saga 299 ~B It Goodbye Virgil~

Forgive Me, Echo,
I AM a Billionaire right now. And while most are terrified by their greed. I don’t want to scare anyone. A lie

But let’s start with some facts. V is right here. And he ain’t going nowhere. Like the song “I’m right here and I ain’t goin’ nowhere You can turn tables, and you can throw chairs.” One thing that he and Braxton have in common. And speaking of which, Braxton is still dead. I never need reminding of that. Only it was something on Facebook… Inspector. What was it, hmm? Today it doesn’t matter. Yet I can’t say goodbye to Braxton or Virgil these days. Well, if you ask me which I prefer. Not that it’s a competition. Wake up dead? Of course, I mean me. It would be proper Inspector. To go with another song, “I’m way too good at goodbyes,” If I say them…

For example, if you’re waiting for another reason why I’m late talking to you, Inspector… I swear my dick has gone from two blonde models to a princess. There was Kaycee Barnes, Sandra McCoy, and Diane Lane “Unfaithful. A plethora of British BBWs, for sure. Hannah Harper and resting with Harmony Reigns “Fake Driving School.” So, the third song of the day? “Don’t know why I didn’t come.” Thank you, Norah Jones. I swear, Echo, geez. The days when I could watch porn and get back to business. Madness, Inspector. There’s the business of the Day Job when I walk out at the end of my shift. That’s that, ha. And, of course, my worst goodbye… besides my son leaving. Waking up in the morning

That’s because as soon as I turn on any of these screens. There’s always something, Inspector. Do you want to know what has me depressed today? Pop Culture whore… (Goes all Amanda Bynes, Ask Ashley) “THAT’S ME!” E, I’m going to get pretty stupid. Okay, so Carlie Jo is getting married. So is Suzy Lu. You can add Shelby from “Girlfriend Reviews to the list. Then Samantha “TBR Schmitt” is expecting. Becky Blow… pregnant. Now ask me, what the eff any of this has to do with me? Nothing. And I’m glad for them. But what have I said about manhood and fatherhood? Family? Killed my son, B III. There’s my Olds, my sister, Virgil? Love and Happiness? I think not. B It Goodbye Virgil

815 Days Without B III, Day 256 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 298 ~Loving B’s and V’s…~

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Don’t ever ask me about my business or my B. A lie. I could talk about both forever. One more reason for V and still looking for a woman… “‘Cause our love would be forever,” like the song. And I’m obsessive in trying to be polite. Loving B’s and V’s.

Tuesday, April 25, 2023

Saga 298 ~Loving B’s and V’s…~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now. I wish I could say it’s because I loved B enough. Like V… Any other letters?

Loving B’s and V’s. Hell! I said after B, there would never be another. And being the prick, I am… There still isn’t. Love at first sight, indeed. I should have remembered that with B. I’m sure when you first heard me mention B, V. Well if I wasn’t talking about the boys; then it had to be my business. Color Me Badd… Yeah, here comes all the Pop Culture. From the idea that “I Wanna Sex You Up?” Well, I do. So why don’t I? 115 days still crying. There was a time I thought I would never have sex again. Penance, Punishment, Pressure. To love, somehow, something, someone as much as I do, my boy. I love you, our kids, and my business.

Dotting i’s and crossing t’s when it comes to business. Funny, I’d never tell you something like, “My business, my business. Stay the eff up out my business, ’cause it’s mine, oh mine.” Ludacris? really? I’m shocked that you decided to “Stay With Me.” Surprising. “Why am I so emotional? No, it’s not a good look, gain some self-control” Whatever. When it comes to my son. I can’t say that I’ve even given it the college try. He was mine. And yet when it comes to the “sin” that is this place. “Take me baby, or leave me.” Uh oh! I’m not worried about this. But it’s being a grieving father. My firstborn son… gone! Baby girl, I want you involved. But “On My Own.”

Minding my P’s and Q’s. As it isn’t right to be crying all the time. But grief, my love (sigh).
It’s sort of a forever thing. Like, love? And as the song goes, “But he talks like a gentleman,” and I try. But you have to realize I had no idea who I was until I was around 21, love. Only then, it wasn’t getting drunk. “You know you’re gonna have to face it, you’re addicted to love.” Last song? Anyway, it wasn’t between a pair of legs. It was a ball of fluff’s finding me. Let me rephrase, ha-ha. It was the puppy stepping on my head every morning. Polite? No. But my reason. He is love. You are loved. Loving B’s and V’s…

814 Days Without B III, Day 255 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will