Tag: Memory

Journey 213 ~Braxton Decides, Virgil Obeys~

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So, WWE Royal Rumble or dog movies with explosions mixed in and loneliness? Every time I Turn Around, Back In Love Again. Or do I really, really, like her Twins? Is B gone? I ain’t accepting that! Decisions, Decisions. “Braxton Decides, Virgil Obeys.”

Friday, January 30, 2026

Journey 213 ~Braxton Decides, Virgil Obeys~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… As if I’m the Decider in these things. Wasn’t that Bush? My history is somewhat hazy.

“A man chooses, a slave obeys.”
― Andrew Ryan BioShock

Yes, I know “Bioshock.” I know MAGA and Republicans ruin things. They are no longer the party of Lincoln. But what I know most of all today. My son is dead. Well, he was dying this time five years ago. But still, there was so much to write: preparation, A-Hole.

I might as well say it, I’m an “Asshole.” Denis Leary sings it better. But am I an asshole for making bad decisions? Or is it because I decided I’m a doing nothing bum? Duh!

You didn’t come here to make the choice; you’ve already made it. You’re here to understand why you made it.
The Oracle, The Matrix Reloaded

Making the decision and living with it are two entirely different entities. In The End…

Well, Sophia, I’m always wrong. Whatever happened to WWJD? “I said he doesn’t look a thing like Jesus.” Not B III! What Would Braxton Do?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Fight, Feast, and take care of his failure of a father. When have I ever fought? My feast today will probably be McDonald’s. Yes, I said probably. And tomorrow will be more of the same. A burger, and then I have to get BBQ. The traditional meal of Braxton’s Happy Death Day, January 31st, 5th Anniversary. And failure? I’m sitting on the loveseat, and I watch my youngest son. And it helps to pass the time.” Because making any decisions.

Hell! I can say I’m better than MAGA with it. Then again, I sentenced my oldest son, my Braxton, to die. Euthanasia… I hate that word! And I’m still wondering what Virgil’s problem is. I know he’s not Braxton reincarnated. Reading another pet loss book.

Sophia, don’t ask me how I pick out books. It’s like writing “I feel his hand on my brain. When I write rhymes, I go blind and let the Lord do his thing”. Braxton? Tupac…

Anyway, as I was telling M Anime or trying to. My words, like decisions, are pretty bad, but as far as the past goes, as Eastman imparted to Morgan in TWD. I wanted to say:

Eastman: “What we’ve done, we’ve done.”
Morgan: “We evade it by moving forward with a code to never do it again.”
Eastman: “To make up for it.”
Morgan: “To still accept what we were.”
Eastman: “To accept everyone… And in doing that, protect yourself.”
TWD

And as much as MAGA wants us all to live “from the age of Big Brother, from the age of doublethink,” the past cannot be undone. I have the present: Virgil, M Anime, and me.

Will I love him? Forgive her? And will I get a burger? Accept Braxton’s loss… Uh… Braxton Decides, Virgil Obeys.

1825 Days Without B III, Day 1266 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 209 ~B’s Last Bark Virgil~

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If my boy then knew what his Dad knows now. But I don’t blame B. Especially this week. There is always so much noise. The Day Job, the snoring of Braxton’s little doggy bro. And is that the damn phone? And now Braxton’s silence. B’s Last Bark Virgil.

Monday, January 26, 2026

Journey 209 ~B’s Last Bark Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Did you have a good day? How many times have you cried today? Three? A coincidence? Does it matter?

“What is an ocean but a multitude of drops?”
Adam Ewing, David Mitchell’s Cloud Atlas

Not enough ocean to drown in. Not enough to sail to come and “Find Me.” Nowhere near enough to cleanse everything. New beginning? M Anime, Virgil. Man In The Mirror?

Daddy. My father. You haven’t heard the last of me. My name? Braxton BARKS Bradford.

It’s all you can hear right now, but what am I saying? “Every Breath You Take.” Every beat of your heart. But you know what I really miss? Well, I am my father’s son. Always.

The noise, the silence, and everything in between those two ears of yours. Daddy’s brain.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I hope you don’t mind me saying this. Actually, it’s Forrest Gump anyway. Dear Daddy:

“I’m not a smart man… but I know what love is.”
Tom Hanks, Forrest Gump

Again, I am my father’s son, and you’re better than this. Don’t think you are…

Know. No? Not this week anyway. Couldn’t you pick the day I ate your French Toast or Waffles? And the day after, when you protected your pancakes. And I got my nickname. “I love you like pancakes,” you would say, “but you have to calm down.” How about the day I jumped into that rolling thing of yours? I wasn’t the only one who hated that. And I can understand why you were always so angry when you came back from “Wherever You Will Go.” But I didn’t know what I was supposed to bark at. So there was silence.

Dad, I would watch you sleep and make sure whatever was chasing you stayed away.

Only I don’t know what that is now, or rather…

She walked, ran, or got effed five months down the road. I know, Dad, Language! You’ve told me I would have liked her, but I’m not sure. Virgil is trying his best. But M Anime, my potential stepmom, you called her. That’s when you began to feel love once more.

That bitch! Again, I’m minding my barks. But she got you “Smokin Out The Window.” And you wouldn’t call her such-and-such. But another reason I’m mad is this. What happens when you get hurt, Dad? You told my Favorite Girl that you can’t imagine any worse pain than yours truly. And so I need to bark loud enough to overcome the boohoo’s, the bawling, and be your boy, always. Woof, woof! B’s Last Bark Virgil

“Your pets want to help you heal. They want to communicate with you. All you need to do is listen.”
― Yes, Pets Do Go To Heaven!
By Sophia Grace

“Arma Virumque Cano”
(I sing of arms and the man.)
(Book I, opening line) Aeneid

1821 Days Without B III, Day 1262 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 206 ~B’s In Love, Virgil~

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Bye-bye, Love. Things I can say about my dog and my ex-girlfriend. But this week, I should be reading all about her. My effable, breedable ex. But somebody else is living that dream. I’m reading fictional accounts. If only B knew. B’s In Love, Virgil

Friday, January 23, 2026

Journey 206 ~B’s In Love, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… And not share a review? I’m not in the mood. And I’ve already cried twice today.

One of those being from an effing mobile game. 2:30 in the effing morning for a forty-one-year-old to play Whiteout Survival. I can’t handle rejection anymore. Braxton accepted me. Barking, “You want… every… single second.” That was my son, my Braxton. But no, I won’t be watching 2004’s Dawn of the Dead on the 31st. I don’t think. Doggy movies… Only I’ve gotten into watching The Mill (2023) and Spontaneous (2020). And why is that?

It doesn’t matter, and it’s next week’s problem. Last night, the question was, what’s next?

Do I continue with Pledged To Him 9: An Unconventional Romance (His Sorority Harem Book Nine), or A Life Together: A Slice of Life Contemporary Harem (The House Husband’s Harem Book 3)? Then there’s Braxton…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I could honor my boy by reading Yes, Pets Do Go To Heaven!: How to Communicate With Pets In The Afterlife, Understand Signs & Why You Will See Them Again. How does that honor B III, again? And V is only five. Four of which have been in abject terror.

Try “forty-one stony gray steps towards the grave. You know the box.” Pop Culture ha!

Because I don’t want to talk about M Anime. Her story or stories? Effing incredible.

Sophia, if I remember nothing else about her, M Anime had a breeding kink you wouldn’t believe. So is that why I was crying last night? I would have been leaking another bodily fluid. Eww! But I was reading about Jackson Breeding his bride-to-be, Yukiko.

It was women like Yukiko Tanaka, Tia Tanaka, Syren, Lulu Chu, and let’s not forget Hentai that got me into Asian women. And if we talk about brunettes… Forever Ever!

But anyway, Breeding. That’s what M Anime and I should be doing right now. Saturday?

She’ll be married to someone else if she isn’t married right now. Why’s that, Sophia?

Breeding. She wanted children. I wrote, okay, so babies. If anything, I was just surprised.

So either she can’t read, or I can’t write. In either case, she’s “Gone.” And so I torture myself with her words, my depraved wants, and Latina women, if you’ve ever wondered about the covers. B would have loved her and Virgil… Not right! Not write! B’s In Love, Virgil

1818 Days Without B III, Day 1259 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 202 ~Braxton’s Dream, Virgil’s Nightmare~

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I Have A Dream. Most days, I’m less Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and more Bing from Fifteen Million Merits. My last dream involved yabbos and fake ones at that. M Anime’s aren’t. And B loved his Favorite Girl’s pair. Braxton’s Dream, Virgil’s Nightmare

Monday, January 19, 2026

Journey 202 ~Braxton’s Dream, Virgil’s Nightmare~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Did you have a good day? Yes, I dared to ask. Whatever. Don’t. Silence. But “I Have A Dream.”

Or I will when you wrap your arms around me and fall asleep like the last week we were together. But that’s not now… No, next week. SIGH, five years. But this week, my father.

It will be five months since another dream… Died? No, she is very much alive, last you knew. Learning about the Birds and the Bees. Dicks and Vaginas? Yes, I know, Dad, that is like so cringe. You had to give me “The Talk” when my Favorite Girl visited us.

However, your Favorite Girl. You left mine alone, and it’s not Cherry. But M Anime. Daddy, I’m not here to say, I told you so, or I informed you thusly. The best legs, breasts, and thighs are in a bucket…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Or a box of chicken. I don’t want to talk about the Glow Box directly. The Last of Us, The Big Bang Theory, and you’re still on about “The Running Man.” And what about Virgil? You compared yourself and my little brother to “The Long Walk—cold, Long, and Sad.

But I Have A Dream today! Dr. Martin Luther King Jr? If you could bring someone back, my father, it would be me. And you are the best man I know. But neither of our dreams would be for the best of everyone. I’m sure you don’t mind me barking, FDT, eff MAGA, all of the Cracker Hats! But what’s my dream? I heard yours yesterday, and while I like girls after touching their yabbos…

Love! You told me that if life is a game for everyone, love is not the prize, it is this…

Instructions. I mastered that the first time we walked together. Ray and Pete, Dad and Me. Not The Long Walk but a walk. Soon it will be you and V. You and my siblings with two legs. Some woman who isn’t M. And ending this week, Dear Heaven, Dear Father.

I have a dream that when you finish your books about her and when my books are everywhere, you’ll realize you “Can’t Me Now.” And you don’t want M anymore.

Honestly, Daddy, I Have A Dream you will rise, writing, women, and wealth. And all with my little brother. A family. Braxton’s Dream, Virgil’s Nightmare

“Let B III stay, that’s all.”
― My Turn To B III: Love, Guilt, and…

“Sleep, the gentlest of the gods, crept down and poured forgetfulness upon his eyes.”
Aeneid

1814 Days Without B III, Day 1255 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 199 ~Will’s BV Book Club~

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Join the club, cult? I’ll never join MAGA, FDT! But don’t I want that kind of power? I know people, or instead I’ve read books by people like Neil Bimbeau, Michael Dalton, and my Ex. The only reading club I belong to right now is Will’s BV Book Club.

Friday, January 16, 2026

Journey 199 ~Will’s BV Book Club~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Or should I write you a review? Is It A Crime? Or how about an excuse?

Excuses sound best to the one making them… Or something like that. But I’m breathing. I’m out of bed and on the loveseat once. Surrounded by “Glow Boxes,” as I believe Braxton thought of them. And not one of them is a book. We both can agree that my writing leaves much to be desired. Yeah, it stinks. Then, on another, I’m conquering the “ice age.” “Whiteout Survival.” Why am I still playing that again? It’s cold and biting, ok.

Virgil and I can’t do that in real life, it’s so cold… Or am I lazy? There wasn’t any ice on the car this morning. And then there are reactions to a writer who I’ll never be, Stephen King. Or do I want Denise’s Yabbos?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

How’s that for a love letter? I’ve been thinking a lot about what I’ve been writing and not writing lately. And I damn near had a panic attack yesterday about words I had written down on Wednesday. Lady Sophia, I hate MAGA, the Cracker Hats, and always FDT, no question. I got two words from them: Nuremberg Trials. So they know their way around crimes. But I’m African-American. “First, let me explain, I’m just a black man.” I shouldn’t be akin to this evil. Hell, taking my B III’s life wasn’t evil enough? I know?

Sophia, I trust my morality way more than Trump’s. Says the man that wants to own a brothel, a porn studio, and one day wants a Harem-type family, Lady Sophia.

Effing M Anime! You know I’ve watched and read a lot about Cuckoldy, NTR, and Harems. But when the woman I, lov… Whatever! But she’s in some Cuban guy’s Harem.

And as I’ve said, after the 24th, I’ll never mention her again, but that’s a lie. I have to finish “Nightmare At The Meat Market” and “Cries Come Women Come Country.” Those stories are about her “hopes and dreams.” They’ll suck more than Braxton’s story.

However, I want to believe that “Someday, when my life has passed me by…” Seriously?

I want people to have people clamoring, I want a fan club, hell, I want a damn cult for my writing. Yeah, he read The House Husband’s Harem one day, whoopee! Will’s BV Book Club

1811 Days Without B III, Day 1252 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 195 ~That’ll B Hue, Virgil~

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The Rainbow Connection? How about the theme for Mario Kart’s Rainbow Road? There are no “Sunshine, Lollipops, and Rainbows” at the Day Job. THEY do everything to make that place worse. The place that ki… took my son. But, “That’ll B Hue, Virgil”

Monday, January 12, 2026

Journey 195 ~That’ll B Hue, Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… I know better than to ask, “Did you have a good day. Another Day? No Day But Today?

Alive? That’s the last thing you want to be, my father. It’s like talking to MAGA. You ask whether Biden won. THEY say Biden was president. Someone asks, “Are you okay? Are you alive?” What do you answer? You’d rather be with me. And am I not alive? I’m here, right now, as always, Dad. I’m sitting at the corner of your bed on a sad Monday afternoon, guarding the door. In case you were wondering why my little brother Virgil is sleeping dead center, ha-ha. He knows his place. But where are you, Dad? Really. One foot in the grave, your eyes on the rainbow, and your ass to the fire. Language, I know, I know. But your tears, Dad. As clear as then…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

The day. The only day that matters to you… Well, not really? Not this year anyway. If anything, I have M Anime to take a bit of the heat off—bad choice of barks. But you know, if you were going through Hell, I would be right there with you. And I am Daddy? Yes.

The day I finally saw all the colors of the rainbow is the day you saw black, white, and gray. The “Colors of the Wind.” I saw you through the evils of MAGA the first time around, and now you have Virgil. And you’ll always have me. Well, not yesterday. Augmenting reality? That video? The first time I got an actual funeral. Didn’t like it.

Daddy, sure, The Rainbow Bridge.

But it’s you, today. Some days, all you see is red. There is far too much orange in the world, you tell me. You wish you weren’t so yellow. You feel a lot of green and worry about it when it comes to you and Virgil. You’re constantly blue. But not enough to fly away. And for that, I’m grateful. And Indigo, Violet. Unless you’re thinking about the game on the glow box “Indigo Prophecy,” or either of the Violets that would have you kicking me out of the room for a while. No, our royal colors are tan, beige, and black. Dad, that brings me to my point today. Whatever color… We truly see each other, always and forever. See! That’ll B Hue, Virgil

“As fast as Braxton could run, he couldn’t outrun time; as high as he could jump, it only brought him closer to Heaven. B was on the way up.”
― My Turn To B III: Love, Guilt, and Silent Loss

“Do you not see what great a weight of darkness the blind night of the body sheds on minds?”
Aeneid

1807 Days Without B III, Day 1248 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 192 ~Book B, Verse V~

WillLeave a comment

I got eyes, I can see, for now… And who really wants to see and read how hateful MAGA has been? Read this, Eff ICE! Eff MAGA! And FDT! And may Renee Nicole Good rest in peace. And what about my son’s book, 1984, and Big Uns? Book B, Verse V

Friday, January 9, 2026

Journey 192 ~Book B, Verse V~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… But no book review? Braxton’s book makes me cry. And not in a Bestseller kinda way.

And besides, my reading list today has comprised of bills, battles in Whiteout Survival, and “Beef. It’s What For Dinner.” That takes me back. Way before the births of my boys, Braxton and Virgil. Back when I could tell my Ma, “Someone made a mistake” with my existence. Now it’s “Someone made a BIG goddamn mistake!” Same with effing MAGA.

Have you heard about that woman ICE killed, Renee Nicole Good? Eff ICE! Eff MAGA! And always and forever, FDT! That’s not what that’s supposed to be used for… Seriously.

But should I tell you more of my “life” story? Or what about Braxton’s? Seeing that it’s January, you know his picture has been popping up everywhere. The Magic Glasses?

Lady Sophia, my search bar…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

What? Am I talking about that thing dangling between my legs? Seriously, my Lady. Ew!

But I don’t want to talk about that either. My “Enormous P” as the song goes. What I should be talking about are phrases like, “as the song goes,” “of course,” “honestly,” “seriously,” and Braxton help me, the constant pop culture from movies, music, and manuscripts. It’s as if I don’t have a thought of my own. But what is there to think about, talk about, or touch? Well, besides my obsession with some tits. Crass much? Yabbos is nicer.

First week and it’s been Maggie\Lauren Cohen’s, then my Ex’s, a brunette’s, and now Jane’s from See Jane Go TV. The things I’ve written about those things. It’s not nice.

However, the world is not nice. And if I can slog through “My Turn To B III,” My poor B.

What should I read next? A grocery list because there is no food in the house. A biscuit, perhaps. And ain’t nobody got time for MAGA’s BS when people are simply trying to eat most days. No wonder my stomach hurts. I should buy a cookbook. Cooking can be hard.

Such a bold statement… It beats singing “Pre-Cooked Taco Meat” to the song “Rasputin.”

Is that an original thought? An idiotic one? I need more books, but as Rasputin surmised:

‘I only make decisions when my stomach is full, or my balls are empty.”
Rasputin “The King’s Man” (Rhys Ifans)

I know, but wrestling is on tonight, and before that. The life of Braxton. Because I promise my story sucks more. Book B, Verse V

1804 Days Without B III, Day 1245 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 188 ~Color Me Braxton, Virgil~

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Red light? Yellow? Green? Road or bedroom? I prefer Meat Loaf. I will do anything for love but… B III would be pissed sleeping in his own room. Once? Forever. If you could only see the way she loves me. V won’t meet HER. Color Me Braxton, Virgil

Monday, January 5, 2026

Journey 188 ~Color Me Braxton, Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Don’t you recognize me? My brown, beige, but you tell the Glow Boxes tan sometimes—the color of Braxton.

And when did I start speaking in third person? The moment when I saw black, faded to it, became molded by it. No, I’m not talking about you, Dad. And I didn’t mean to sound like Bane either. And haven’t I always seen black, white, and gray? But this black…

Honestly, don’t go crying on me, Daddy. You can’t help it? You were even listening to sad songs at “The Bad Place.” Was it me, you, or that lady you call M Anime? Anyway Daddy.

You’ve been thinking about her a lot. Mostly red, yellow, and green. And Meatloaf Dad. You didn’t like the food. But the music. And I enjoyed both. But the color black, Daddy. It is your favorite, and I saw it…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I mean, I REALLY saw it before my world burst into color. Maybe it is me, since you’re still crying imagining the Rainbow Bridge. Or is it the Rainbow Road from Mario Kart, my father? I remember sitting on your lap as you played. It was better than car rides.

Seriously, though, those weren’t the red, yellow, and green lights you’ve been thinking about when it comes to M Anime… Eww! But if she could make you… No, not Happy.

Believe it or not, I was Happy in my life. “Believe It or Not,” I’m walking on air. I know. Dad, I am my father’s son when it comes to music. But today I know you hear me, but I need you to see, Daddy.

Like the dream you had a few nights ago. “Dark Angel?” That show was WAY before my time. Only you dreamt you were trapped somewhere, drowning, and through the barred window, you saw the Transgenics Flag flying—the black, red, and white with a dove at the center from the show. And you’re trying to SEE what it meant. Darkness, Rage, and Light. Or Rest, Love, and Ladies… Um eww! You know me, Dad, the best breast, legs, and thighs come in a bucket/box of chicken. Or maybe it’s running from the blackness, “The Running Man,” and don’t humans wear white for weddings… You’re permitting me to bark at ONE of your former girlfriends. Huh! If she could see… If you… Color Me Braxton, Virgil.

“I want to know what life was like once.”
― Backyard Dungeon 20 by Logan Jacobs

“Here are tears for things, and mortal sorrows touch the mind.”
― The Aeneid

1800 Days Without B III, Day 1241 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 185 ~B’s Bad Books Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

First copy of my book sold… Multiple personalities, but one Amazon account. Am I going to write a review for myself? I like my blog. Daily… But my first review of the year, first song, first thoughts… my two boys and M’s boobs. “B’s Bad Books Virgil”

Friday, January 2, 2026

Journey 185 ~B’s Bad Books Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Or how about a book review? That’s as uncommon as good news in this world, ha!

Or maybe, “Huh, America, (America).” But I’m not planning to open a restaurant in “Santa Fe” anytime soon. Hell, I’m still crying about M Anime! I’m all, “And I remember the time when you left for Santa Monica. And I remember the day you told me it’s over.” Santa Monica? Theory of a Deadman? I don’t write like the band, but that’s how my words come across. How dare I give myself so much credit, Lady Sophia? But my writing…

Yeah, my writing. I sold a book yesterday. And I decided on my first book of the year. My Turn To B III: Love, Guilt, and Silent Loss, written by yours truly. What the Eff!

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Honestly, have I no shame? No, I have books like:

Vixen Eyes Naughty Saint Nick
Something fun to do at Christmas. Or rather, someone fun to do. But this is a book review, so sticking with the former Naughty Saint Nick by Lexi Davis is just that, a naughty diversion. A quick little love story with some stalker vibes and, of course, the happy ending. And the cute way they met with a modern aesthetic. But aside from the erotica, my favorite part of the book was the little warning the author included. I suppose because of the BDSM aspect… But it’s relatively tame. I should have gotten copies for a few friends since it was a fun read. Not a doubt in my mind about the four stars. However, Amber/Vixen would give it more.

So, my first book review of the year. What’d you think, My Lady? Good. I swear, reading the good news is getting as bad as the bad news. A model made a million on her yabbos, and I haven’t sold a book in five months. M Anime is getting married this month, and I haven’t gotten laid in… Whatever! Magic Glasses? Marriages, Maternity, and Money.

Sigh! What do I get out of this second day of the new year? Mad, My Lady. I get Mad.

Effing angry at everything and nothing at all. I don’t even want to read my book, or is it all pet loss in general? Then there’s women’s mammaries. And effing MAGA. “I See Fire,” My Lady. B’s Bad Books Virgil

1797 Days Without B III, Day 1238 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 181 ~Y Braxton, Why Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Why, when Every Day Is Exactly The Same? The new year starts on Thursday. MAGA celebrates effing the country on the 6th and 20th. I’ll assume M Anime will be married on the 24th, five months after her/our breakup. B left Jan 31. Y Braxton, Why Virgil

Monday, December 29, 2025

Journey 181 ~Y Braxton, Why Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And the question isn’t why am I here. But why are you here, my father? Head full of questions.

Why are you still on “The Long Walk”? Why are you still “The Running Man”? But to be honest, I’m starting to feel a bit like Ee’char to your Chief O’Brien… DS9, Episode 4×19 “Hard Time.” What? I am my father’s son. Humans are weird. But still, you’re my Dad.

Always and forever, that’s why. You can remember Star Trek episodes. You can remember the year, the week, and the day that I… Had a change of venue. Plus, you’re not a movie director… Yet. Whatever happened to “28 Months Later”? Anyway, speaking of directing, that’s what you were thinking about all day at “The Bad Place.” You haven’t even had our customary nap. But you did take Virgil for his walk. To be young…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Which I am, by the way. Or am I older? Anything where I’m not… Not there with you, my father, at “The Closing of the Year.” And you wonder why you stay every single day.

Besides my sleepy little brother, that is. You have to see your dreams… our dreams come true. On that list you found on Saturday, I was number four. And everything else was to build a home for us, a world, and an entire universe. And that I found was being at your side every day. But what about Virgil? He’s been with you, going on four long years. And you and he continue to ask why. Who, what, when, where, and how, too. But why?

Love, loneliness, the last, lately

The belief that “maybe, you’re gonna be the one that saves me.” Are you talking to M Anime, Virgil, or even me? Why not you, Dad? That’s what scares you. Well, one of the many things that scares you. The belief that you couldn’t save me. That you made a big, beautiful mistake when you rescued Virgil. Isn’t it ironic? You left me in the back on Sunday, January 31, 2021, and on Saturday, August 13, 2022, you were springing Virgil from his cage. You’re thinking that this fear of asking yourself why you are still here is why M Anime no longer is. She left. Why? You stay. Why? Virgil? Why? I won’t say this year. But why not answer? Y Braxton, Why Virgil

“I don’t want Braxton to think he wasn’t worth staying for.”
― Naughty Saint Nick: A Spicy Holiday
Lexi Davis

“Fly, son of a goddess, and tear yourself away from these flames.”
― The Aeneid

1793 Days Without B III, Day 1234 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son