Tag: Memory

Journey 115 ~Braxton Loved Her Virgil~

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Two months since my breakup with “my girlfriend” M Anime. I cried three times over her. I cried for my son for seventy days straight, multiple times a day. I knew both for years. So “Where Is The Love?” I “loved” her. And B? Braxton Loved Her Virgil.

Friday, October 24, 2025

Journey 115 ~Braxton Loved Her Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Again, not a book review? And I can’t even call myself a man of courage. Why?

Check out that title. I meant to say “Braxton Loved Her V.” But my Ma raised a gentleman… Well, she tried. With everything I’ve done… I’ll Always Love My Mama.

But I miss my boy. I love Braxton. And Virgil? He can tell I’m in a mood… Not like that.

Neither one of us is anyone’s “Beast Of Burden.” Well, I’m not anymore. M Anime.

“Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty girls”
― Beast Of Burden

She was the prettiest, my lady. And I can’t go crooning in her ear, you’re my “Lady.” Not since Sunday, August 24, 2025. I’d stand a better chance of being D’Angelo than being with M Anime. I can’t fix her like a Kindle… They returned my reading streak, my lady.

Threats of losing me and no more stories. M Anime.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

I always start with this story. My Dream: I sit on a beach with an open laptop. Me and M’s two legged children play near the water. Their four-legged siblings, Braxton and Virgil, pull them back. Braxton sits beside me, thinking, “I’m too old for this sh*t.” B III… Next, M Anime asks if I have to stay and be macho or if I will have fun with her. Really?

My next story is simplistic. A reason to love “Sunday Morning.” I like Maroon 5, but for “A Sunday Kind of Love.” Like I told Dear Future Wife, Journey 112 ~B And V Bench~ Atom Bomb Baby, Thirteen Women (And Only One Man In Town), Sputnik (Satellite Girl), Watch World War Three (on Pay TV).

And speaking of war, if you only heard the dark fantasies that M Anime conceived. Seriously, the woman inspired two novels, and I will forever be grateful. But to do the things she wanted, ferocious, fiendish, and felonious… What made me the most fearful, um.

Babies. My Ex-girlfriend wanted babies. And yes, that scared me, but to be a father… Honestly, she only needed to ask, but she didn’t, and that’s why we broke up. That’s not being negative, it’s only the truth. M wanted to be a mom, so she’s marrying some Cuban guy. And besides writing something that apparently spoke the contrary… Truthfully.

Sophia. I’d keep M Anime and my love story, only erasing August 24 and January 31. Braxton Loved Her Virgil.

1727 Days Without B III, Day 1168 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 111 ~Shielded From B-Days, Virgil~

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So it’s my second born’s birthday. V’s five. I forgot my second best friend got married on the October 19th… Uh, her first marriage. Now “Girls Just Want To Have Fun.” Her second marriage to wifey. But Virgil’s birthday? Shielded From B-Days, Virgil.

Monday, October 20, 2025

Journey 111 ~Shielded From B-Days, Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… To you my lord, my king, and always and forever my father, greetings from the Otherside. And to Virgil

My little brother, brother from another mother, my father’s son, and my shield brother, Happy Birthday! Welcome to Level 5! Welcome To The World! And, “I Got 5 On It.” Well, you do right Daddy? The customary buying of French Fries and a birthday lunch.

Remembering what it was like to be five…That would have been back in 2010, Dad.

Nothing can shield you from time except; um, death. You’ll have me sounding like Rocky.

It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done!”
― Rocky Balboa 2006

But a bag of fries does take the sting off a bit. And words, my Dad’s words were so many.

“When one falls, we continue. When? One falls. Not if, when!”
Clair Obscur: Expedition 33

“Meet me on the battlefield
Even on the darkest night
I will be your sword and shield, your camouflage
And you will be mine”
Svrcina, Meet Me on the Battlefield

From Svrcina’s “Meet Me on the Battlefield,” to Clair Obscur: Expedition 33 and even more. Words shielded us from the ignorance of this life but today I smile. And you.

“As is our charge this day. As is our sorrow. And yet, I smile. We will leave our loved ones… to traverse a dangerous road. Rushing out of peace into war. And yet, I smile. For we will mine glory from the rock of struggle this day. We will honor and protect this… this bastion of life in a land of the dead, and we will win. You trust the king… we will win. I smile… I laugh… I rejoice this day… for on this day, we are joined in purpose and vision… we are of a singular heart and mind. On this day, we are one!”
King Ezekiel, TWD

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Virgil’s life deserves celebration. A year missing from it makes no never mind to us.

Daddy I’ve got four since Sunday, January 31, 2021. But much like Morpheus “I remember that which matters most… We are still here!” You, me, and Virgil! A trident, perhaps. The Triforce, Wisdom, Power, and Courage. The Holy Trinity. Our lives, are divine my father. Fifteen years I spent lighting up the darkness. And now Virgil has five with many more to come. And you “Forty-One.” Looking forward to the day you don’t hear drums beating like the galley slaves in “Ben-Hur.” That’s not me being negative, No, Daddy as you say often it’s a simple fact. And with that you and 2-Vshould have a movie night. Ours were nice.

But life… “Life, uh, finds a way.” That’s what you were thinking about while you were at the bad place. The silver lining there is on days like these you came back with fries, Ha!

And it didn’t even have to be 2-V’s birthday. A simple fact, that food staves off death. I should have try some hm. Not cool but not negative. Facts are facts. And we ain’t MAGA!

We know the truth. You always said you could see yourself through my eyes. But it didn’t hurt to pretend that you were wearing a pair of Neil Bimbeau’s Magic Glasses and you were safe, protected and shielded from the world. All to return, protect and celebrate. But Virgil needn’t be Shielded From B-Days, Virgil.

“One must forgo a portion of their peace and autonomy to live with another.”
Backyard Dungeon 20 by Logan Jacobs

“Our hearts are strong in war. Our spirits are high. Our fighting men are tried and proved” ― The Aeneid

1723 Days Without B III, Day 1164 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 108 ~To B Reel Virgil~

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Does it count that I say please when I ask the AI for something? Please summarize my work. Please create a small intro. Please show me and my boys, with my Ex and her big yabbos. A 1000 words or fewer that could have been a picture. To B Reel Virgil.

Friday, October 17, 2025

Journey 108 ~To B Reel Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… What? And not another book review. And what about “The Long Walk?” Ain’t got no time.

“Should have been dead on a Sunday morning, banging my head
No time for mourning
Ain’t got no time”
Creed

Isn’t that my excuse for everything? Ain’t got no time. If only I were publishing books. Or if I were living Johnny Sins’ life. Minus effing the beautiful women, that’s what existing feels like today. “The NeverEnding Story,” which is me breathing. Complete utter mess!

Much like my playlists. We’ve gone from Creed’s My Own Prison to the Stranger Things version of NeverEnding Story. There’s so much noise when I’d prefer silence or my snoring. Hell! I’d take crying over B III, or ranting about M Anime breaking my heart.

And what about Cherry’s yabbos? I should finish the novels about M Anime and Cherry.

And I need to finish reading a story for Sunday. It won’t be “Backyard Dungeon 21,” my lady. Sad stories…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Ain’t got no time. Since I’m supposed to be creating a business plan, did you know that even hardcore adult films have stories? Of course! But this week I’ve been reminded of staying up late when I was “younger” to watch things like Co-Ed Confidential, Life on Top, Forbidden Science, etc. And didn’t a hero say something about great power?

Responsibility. Braxton took me for a hero. And his little brother, Virgil? Well, he’s lying on his pillow and we’re not in bed at the moment. Nor are we at the Dining Room table, Lady Sophia. No more sorrowful stories. Well, Eddie Hill hasn’t lost anyone in Backyard Dungeon 21. They are celebrating Halloween. Entirely a coincidence, I’m reading it?

Honestly. My Dear Lady Sophia.

We have another week before Halloween, but Virgil’s birthday is on Monday. He’ll be 5.

I still remember when Braxton’s Favorite Girl made Braxton a cake, and we had a night of watching movies together. Tasteful films because it was B III’s birthday after all.

Braxton will tell me to be a good father to Virgil. The things I don’t have to write down, but I can see myself doing, despite everything. As far as I was/am concerned, Braxton would/will live forever. And I don’t see Virgil getting any older. He needs a nail trim…

That bill will be a love story. That’s not negativity but a simple truth, like making a grocery list for Virgil and me. Paying with what? To B Reel Virgil

1720 Days Without B III, Day 1161 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 104 ~To B Discovered Virgil~

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I discovered I had a son when he had his furry face in a plate of French Toast or waffles. I discovered my other son in a pen at PetSmart, knowing how to use the training pad. And as for finding myself. I’m still alive. Dammit! To B Discovered Virgil

Monday, October 13, 2025

Journey 104 ~To B Discovered Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Surprised I’m still here? It’s like the day you discovered me in your plate of French Toast. Isn’t it?

Or was it waffles? Do I look like Donkey from Shrek to you? Admit it, Dad, you’d say I look dead. And if I were a zombie, you’d still have me in a room, locked away, feeding on anyone you could get your hands on. And you’d lie, saying that everything is ok. I know.

I’m not sounding very chipper. Am I getting into the spirit of Halloween? Or is it the fact that today is Indigenous Peoples’ Day? Never Columbus Day. “Everybody Hates Chris.”

But I can never hate you, Dad, as if I don’t bark that to you more often than not. Whisper. And “If You Don’t Know Me by Now.” Because “I’m not lost, I’m not lost, just undiscovered.” And discovery Daddy…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

I discovered that I have the best dad in the whole wide world, even when you didn’t want to believe it. The man who watched me dive face-first into a plate of waffles. The one who took me on my first walk. Who drew blood on blood because my life matters. Braxton’s Life Matters. You’ve been saying that forever, and even at the end, you loved me enough to “Send Me On My Way.” However, we both discovered I didn’t go far, Daddy. That’s right

Case in Point, Virgil being knocked out at the foot of the bed. You didn’t bring McDonald’s back for my little bro? Fries and sleep. That’s like you thinking about “waffles and pu$$y.” The Purge: Election Year. Our movie nights.

I remember when we both discovered my favorite girl. It only took me six months to decide I liked you inviting her to movie nights. She would always share her food with me, and she even made me a cake. Remember, Dad, Virgil’s birthday is on the 20th. He’s 5.

Or he will be soon. And you’re still “Forty-One.” I can hear the drums too, Daddy. Ben-Hur, The Ten Commandments, and Spartacus, to name a few. We watched our classics.

And even if it won’t be you and M Anime, God, “Bless The Broken Road. “The Long Walk,” my father. You walk on, you row on, and sooner or later, you will discover your wish. I long to discover your happiness. To B Discovered Virgil

“I want to know what life was like once.”
Backyard Dungeon 20 by Logan Jacobs

“There, happiness and a kingdom are in store for you, with a queen for you to marry.”
― The Aeneid

1716 Days Without B III, Day 1157 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 101 ~B, V, Bedtime Stories~

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Once upon a time, I had a Playboy subscription. Now there are thirst traps. From there, the more enterprising pervs and criminals created sites. And now Grok can animate and from there… Shouldn’t I be sending Virgil off to bed? B, V, Bedtime Stories.

Friday, October 10, 2025

Journey 101 ~B, V, Bedtime Stories~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… About Room 101? I haven’t read 1984 in a while. I can’t buy Sandra Newman’s “Julia.”

Ok, so that’s a lie. I could, but I won’t. Why? Um, it’s the bedtime story I tell myself, Soph.

“Stuff is getting better, stuff is getting better every day.”
– Kevin Costner, The Postman (1997)

The Postman (1997), along with the book I marked way back in 2014. Nightmares, Sophia.

It’s thoughts like these I’m trying to avoid by telling Braxton and now Virgil “old stories of courage and justice, difficult as they are to remember.” Why’s that, right, Sophia?

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Honestly? “It’s Been Awhile “since you’ve heard me rattle off that list. How many nights have I gone to bed past midnight, imagining some girl? Artificial intelligence is a b*tch. And when I’m not being a perv, I’m again repeating Eric Vall’s “Succubus Lord” series. How do I explain the world I want to wake up in? That’s 150-words. Oops.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Well, I can say that I’ve been working on programming through trial and error. That other ten bucks I’m not spending goes toward reading things like BBC Missionary V2. That’s not negativity but a fact. And “I’m So Thankful” that B was a little “Riot Maker.” So I had lots of private time when he got in trouble. And V is a heavy sleeper and hesitant to walk in on me. One day he’ll feel comfortable enough to walk back and forth, but until then…

I have time to find stories that are much more appropriate for my sons. Hell, even Eddie Hill has dogs in “Backyard Dungeon 20.” And currently, he’s fighting everyone’s demons.

What about people? A kind woman at the grocery store.

And what about starting a business of my own? Well, I’ve been busy, getting myself more hours on the Day Job. And I’m choosing to have faith for now that my schedule will only bring good things. And speaking of good things I need to read, then again maybe not.

My Old Man was around the other day when I wasn’t here. And the fact is… I’m still here. No text or phone calls? I fully expected my life to fade to black with Linkin Park’s “What I’ve Done,” playing in the background. But I got to have hope. Isn’t that the lesson, my lady? Why? Because the sweetest bedtime story, at least to my boys, is that I breathe.

Bedtime. B, V, Bedtime Stories.

1713 Days Without B III, Day 1154 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 097 ~You Could B Me~

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As Braxton grew older, I would often give him a choice. Do you want to take a walk, or should we put in some work on these burgers and fries? He and I were of the same mind. He wanted to be like me. I want to be like him. “You Could Be Me.”

Monday, October 6, 2025

Journey 097 ~You Could B Me~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And that was a bad choice of words. You Could B Me. It’s all you ever think about, Daddy.

Really shuffling off the mortal coil. Losing the meat sack, not being a meat popsicle.

Honestly, from Shakespeare to Futurama, and The Fifth Element. And can I also bark eww, Dad? But neither of us is any good with words. We were one in the same, my father, weren’t we? And yet in the “Interlude,” this thing I called life, I could say, “And in this moment, I am happy.” You sing I “Wish You Were Here.” Your little playlist.

Seriously, Daddy, you never called me that, but that’s proof that I’m still here at this moment lying beside you? You’d read from your library, we’d have a listening party, or you’d lie about writing. But like Markwayne Mullin, you scream, “I don’t want reality.”

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Because You Could B Me; to keep me awake and alive, “In Your Eyes,” all you have to do is listen to me. Hell, listen to Virgil, my little brother. If anything, I know he loves you, Dad. Guys like me and him wouldn’t fight so hard to be around you. Dad, you are home.

You can’t see air, the beat of your heart, or the butterflies that will one day appear for our future stepmom, but it’s all there, Daddy. It never left, just like my Dad. Always. Forever.

Everything and “Nothing At All.” It’s faith, Dad. Isn’t It Ironic that we were both atheists and at the moment I… Let’s say I got a haircut and lost the furry weight, we became holy.

I became books, bucks, more than your boy, but everyone’s. That’s the dream, isn’t it, Daddy? I will never be bones. And Bailey from “A Dog’s Purpose” has his fandom.

Daddy, “God Bless The Child” that got his own. Daddy, you’re mine. Always my father.

You keep me in beautiful art. Your blankets, no matter how well washed, still have me and now your little V. There are breaths of me in clothing from my first day to my last day. “You Could B Me” as much as you keep me here. And that is the point, isn’t it, Dad?

My strength, my spirit, and what is that something? Yesterday, you asked for peace. You want to be me? Be Happy. You Could B Me.

“My plan is to make things right, as much as I can.”
Backyard Dungeon 20

“The seeds of life – fiery is their force, divine their birth, but they are weighed down by the bodies’ ills or dulled by limbs and flesh that’s born for death.”
― The Aeneid by Virgil

1709 Days Without B III, Day 1150 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 094 ~Ends With B, Virgil~

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So I’ve been reading Neil Bimbeau’s short stories. How do they end? Paul lost the magic glasses and was knocked out by a woman. Why does that sound so familiar? Happens to a lot of guys. “Across The Universe.” Jai Guru Dev.” Ends With B, Virgil.

Friday, October 3, 2025

Journey 094 ~Ends With B, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… I should tell Virgil stories of his big brother, Braxton. I’ve shared this blog with AI.

And since ‘the INTERNET is FOREVER,’ or so they say, the story never ends. Honestly?

I don’t need the story to end—just me. So, what has me in a mood today? I can’t blame Neil Bimbeau; only “The Magic Glasses: The Ultimate Bundle (Forty Book Bundle)” could have had any ending at all. But it’s like that Green Day song, you know, “Good Riddance”

“It’s something unpredictable, but in the end is right.
I hope you had the time of your life.”
Good Riddance

Speaking of which, M Anime… I still haven’t heard from her. I haven’t been so… ‘disappointed’ in a story’s ending since she threw our friendship in the trash in August.

“When It’s Over,” that’s the time I fall in love again. I’d sing Sugar Ray to her, “I’m missing you.” But my Depression ends here, dammit! If only I could…

Only Spotify has other ideas, as the first song that cues up is “Swan Song” by Dua Lipa, which is quite empowering. And regardless of the emotion, I got to add a couple of tunes to the “Stephani’s Sunday Symphony,” which has completely overwhelmed her, “The Red Sash.” Those are simple facts. Sophia, I’m not being negative. It’s called history.

MAGA definitely falls into the negative, but as I said, this is not a “Swan Song,” but a reminder that such love does exist in the world. For example, how “Alita: Battle Angel” was willing to give Hugo her heart. Or how Alita’s father” gave her two bodies to live.

If only I could have built Braxton a body like the dog in that movie…

Again, that’s not negativity but only a fact. As Odysseus said, “It’s no insult to say a dead man is dead. But I know how “Troy” ends. I know how 1959’s “Ben-Hur” ends, ‘Forty-One’ (cue rowing galley drums). “Alita: Battle Angel” didn’t get a sequel, but the first film ended on a hopeful note. There are so many other tales that I should see to their conclusions—a lifetime’s worth.

How will it end today for me? Despite everything, I have to try, right, Sophia? And having made it to October, Virgil will be five on the 20th—a third of B’s age. But Sophia?

Can we go all Bon Jovi with it, “Whoa, we’re halfway there. Whoa-oh, living on a prayer,” ha-ha. That’s an ending. Ends With B, Virgil.

1706 Days Without B III, Day 1147 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 090 ~Idol Braxton, Idle Virgil~

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I wasn’t sitting on my ass when my son was dying. I was working, trying to earn a living. Stimulus package… And now I couldn’t even get out of bed today. Let the beasties have the house if they’re out there. But this temple. Idol Braxton, Idle Virgil

Monday, September 29, 2025

Journey 090 ~Idol Braxton, Idle Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And it’s not my purpose to make you feel bad. That’s no dog’s purpose. But my purpose these days…

No, it’s not that 150-Word Depression cap. Since we’ve been talking, Dad. I mean, I’ve been talking to you since Monday, November 11, 2024, in Meditation 133 ~A, B, C, Me~

Longer. Since Sunday, January 31, 2021, the day I… Anyway, we’d argue all day.

“I Can Do This All Day”
Captain America/ Steve Rogers

Honestly, that’s something I miss. Afternoons like this one, Wednesday, September 24, 2025. You would wake up from a nap and finally be ready to tell me about the world.

“An old friend has learned the path to immortality.”
Episode III: Revenge of the Sith

You kept me safe. And I, in turn, would sit on my perch at the foot of the bed, protecting you, my father. You placed me higher than anyone. Even before yourself. Before my little brother Virgil. Black and white, Daddy. Free his mind, and his ass will follow you.

“You have to let it all go, Neo. Fear, doubt, and disbelief. Free your mind.”

Just like I do. For 20 years and counting. You just haven’t seen me for four of them, Dad. “Free Your Mind.” And the rest will follow. I know Morpheus from “The Matrix” isn’t exactly “En Vogue” right now. You feel as though you’re living in a dream world, Dad.

Talk about Six Impossible Things that you have been contemplating for a bit, my father.

  1. The Magic Glasses: The Ultimate Bundle (Forty Book Bundle). If only your glasses and all the glow boxes you have could do that. Not my favorite. But your happiness…
  2. Speaking of which, M Anime has gone to live the haremlit fantasy with another.
  3. Seriously, how long has it been since you checked outside for the enemy, Daddy?
  4. Artificial Intelligence. AI. I can say Acetaminophen, too, Dad. You didn’t raise a MAGA Cracker Hat. FDT! But anyway, you can manipulate the universe with the glow box, Dad.
  5. You have been dreaming of other worlds. Of being an overnight success, my father.
  6. Keep creating those worlds, Daddy. Use your words. All that you are—my father.

“The words, those words, those words, those words, they have power. They have more power than you ever imagined.”
Play’d

Because while you feel idle. While you etch the story of my death. Virgil’s FEAR.

Honestly, I want to hear the stories of your life. As I would when you woke up on so many afternoons. When we would eat together. On many a walk we shared before “The Long Walk. I’m not an idol, Virgil’s heart isn’t idle. You’re alive. Idol Braxton, Idle Virgil.

“Within these walls, I was about to be God.”
The Magic Glasses: The Ultimate Bundle (Forty Book Bundle), Neil Bimbeau

“Rejoicing at the things pictured on it without knowing what they were, Aeneas lifted onto his shoulders the fame and fate of his descendants”.
― from The Aeneid by Virgil

1702 Days Without B III, Day 1143 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 087 ~Virgil, B Leaves Fear~

WillLeave a comment

More often than not, the book is better than the film. The Long Walk? Or me writing down I’m going to be positive, and then trying to live it. All just words, really, I’m afraid. I have FEAR. My boys, Braxton and Virgil, did/do. Virgil, B Leaves Fear

Friday, September 26, 2025

Journey 087 ~Virgil, B Leaves Fear~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… or, rather, a few ideas. I believe FEAR is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.

It could be the ugliest, which is why I cover it with the most beautiful things. My son Braxton is the most beautiful thing I’ve seen in my whole LIFE. I put him in the ground. Well, in a box. But you know what I mean. I cover the ground in tears. Drown it already.

And then maybe I can fulfill that Langston Hughes. You know the one, Sophia. Honestly:

“The calm,
Cool face of the river
Asked me for a kiss.”
By Langston Hughes

Why do I feel exhausted? It’s far more sinister. It’s FEAR. Will 150 words be enough, Sophia? It’s been officially “One Week” since I started this positivity bonanza. It sucks.

More than a woman on her knees? Ah, yes, my perversions. I told M Anime that receiving fellatio is my favorite. But FEAR remains grounded.

(I Take A Deep Breath)

I had another thought yesterday. Do you remember that I indulge in Christmas Erotica in December? Near the end of 2024 to the start of 2025, in preparation for survival:

  1. Fahrenheit 451, Ray Bradbury
  2. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
  3. 1984 by George Orwell
  4. It Can’t Happen Here by Sinclair Lewis
  5. We by Yevgeny Zamyatin

And so I have survived. So why not another holiday theme? Yesterday was Kindle Double Points. I spent some of the evening looking for Halloween Erotica. I want a zombie apocalypse, FEAR, and preferably HaremLit. But I saved some money this week, my Lady. I still need a book for this week, and I got two free from Kelli Wolfe.

“The Babysitter’s Seduction” and “Hysteria.” She also wrote “Devil’s Bargain: Zombie Apocalypse Erotica (HUNGER Book 1).” If it isn’t music, Lady Sophia, it’ll be books. Perhaps I’ll do some reviews of her short stories. “Someday” while listening to Sugar Ray. It’s because of writers like her that I don’t FEAR writing my erotic fiction literature.

And that’s another thing. If I were to post, let’s say, the week of E-Day over nine years, that would be around 25,200 words. So two weeks would be 50,000. And I want to have three books to add to Braxton’s book by “The Closing Of The Year.” Nothing to FEAR, there, I have everything written. It only needs to be edited. Keep walking or rowing. Virgil, B Leaves Fear.

1699 Days Without B III, Day 1140 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 083 ~To B On First~

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I’ve never been first in anything except being in the back of a girl’s car, and me putting on a condom for the first time as a cute brunette hopped on top of me. I always feel like I’m in the way. Baseball sucks, and now the WWE. But “To B On First.”

Monday, September 22, 2025

Journey 083 ~To B On First~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And “I’m ready to play today.” I know we weren’t really sports guys, except for the Olympics and wrestling.

Wrestlepalooza? That’s the most negative thing you’ll hear from me today, Daddy.

Wanting to play “Centerfield,” the John Fogerty song, not the actual position. Seriously.

I wasn’t one for chasing balls around. My little brother Virgil definitely won’t be either. The first athlete in our family. Nope! I wasn’t even the first dog. But I was… I am honored to be your firstborn son. And since you are my father, I hope you don’t mind…

You know the new rule for yourself, not to be so sad about me. About EVERTHING! Wrestlepalooza is one of many worries you have. I’m not here to add another.

Honestly, I’m not one for motivational barks either. “Everything Is Awesome!” No, Dad, but you are awesome. I love you.

I’m not the first one to say that… But you’ve been thinking about first or thirst. Can I say Eww! I’m not knocking your taste, Dad. There was my favorite girl, M Anime, and others.

We’ll get there. But what about the first time you were FREE, that you had no FEAR, and that you truly felt, this is FINE? Your senior year of high school, for a few minutes. Dad, I didn’t know you back then. I wasn’t even born. But you told me. That sitting on the foot of the bed, keeping you safe, was a taste of that. I’m the first LIFE to make you feel safe.

And you did the same. For fifteen years, you were my hero. Nothing has changed.

Ask Virgil? You might not have been the first to give him a home, but you were the first to make him a son, your child. Virgil of the House of Bradford, Braxton Barks Bradford. The Sons of Bradford. Hell! The Sons and Daughters, maybe. You weren’t M Anime’s first time, Eww! But you are the first who will cost her happiness, because I know the man you are, my father, the man you ought to be. Barking, “I think I like this little life.”

Someday, one day, day one, when will be the first day you meet the man I know, my father? I mean, not like that girl, your first time, seeing Tenchi Muyo or softcore porn. Loving yourself. To B On First.

“You really are a good dad.” I shrugged. “Have to be. He doesn’t have a mom.”
Babysitter Harem: Mia; Age Gap MFFF by Kelli Wolfe

“Is the father to be saved by the wounds of the son?”
― The Aeneid

1695 Days Without B III, Day 1136 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son