Saga 154 ~B’s In English Virgil~

I call myself a writer… a leader of men… I only needed to know the language of a fluff ball 670 days ago. But, of course, I stopped listening to B III. And Virgil Vivi, whenever I leave, he cries. But what else is he saying? Uh? B’s In English Virgil

Friday, December 2, 2022

Saga 154 ~B’s In English Virgil~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now, and I’m mad as Hell, which is par for the course, I guess. English, Billionaire, B…

He’s still gone. I should have read a few books on necromancy instead of reincarnation. Hell! Considering my grades in school regarding reading and Language Arts, hmm. That’s what I was thinking about at the Day Job. If only I had been a better student Lady Sophia. Yeah, I wouldn’t be stuck where I am right now. Fighting off sleep and talking to you. Ok, so that was mean, and I apologize. But what does that do? I apologized to B for not being able to save him. I even said I was sorry to Virgil for how I picked him up. There are a couple of ways you can look at that if we go back 111 days. Gotcha Day. How could I ever?

Virgil Vivi and I still need to understand one another. Could that all change now that I have a few days off? I swear, my lady, these words have so many meanings. How Bizarre? Like saying I’m sick. Do I mean mentally, physically, or emotionally? Oh, there’s my rage. My body has been sick for so long; I don’t know what it is to feel better, to be honest. Though I haven’t been right since Braxton. Well, even when he was here, Lady Sophia. Breathing was easier. I talk to him every Thursday or when Time Travel Permits Sophia. I even pray to him. These few moments I once gave “God,” but I never learned to talk to him the right way… Steve Buscemi said:

I remember Todd using “Buscemi” as his “safe word.” On the one hand, Todd is right… sorry, Mr. Buscemi. It immediately shuts down thoughts of sex. But then, Succubus Lord? It’s where I know Todd from. And speaking of which, where’s the holiday erotica, hmm? Not that I mind reading about dogs. One more lady’s success while I continue failing. Writing, speaking, “Lord Give Me A Sign.” I’ve been listening to a lot of music instead of audiobooks. What! Should I listen to Succubus Lord yet again? And I have other books, but I haven’t been in the mood. The same can be said about people at the Day Job. HUMILIATIONS GALORE reaching epic levels! I can’t even tell Virgil. I need to learn his language… B’s In English Virgil

670 Days Without B III, Day 111 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 153 ~To B Enraged Virgil~

RAGE is one giant drill digging. I know I’m going to Hell. Braxton’s death was a nuke leaving a crater. Yet I keep digging, but I can’t get lower than that. Anger, Rage, and Hatred rest in the 5th Circle, B is my 9th Circle sin. “To B Enraged Virgil”

Thursday, December 1, 2022

Saga 153 ~To B Enraged Virgil~

669 Days Without B III, Day 110 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Considering we’re talking now? I’ll give you three guesses about how my day is going.

If I had tried talking to you that Wednesday… Hell! Anytime earlier than our final week. Braxton, I’m not going to get over it, over you. I can’t hate myself more. But I do try B. For example, a few minutes ago. It’s 4:30 in the evening, and I went downstairs to call for you once again. MEDICINE TIME! Only you’re not here. And when I forget to do this, B? RAGE! Not at you but at myself. And then throw in the fact V is lying right here, B III? Another reason I know he’s not you. Braxton, you were too much like me. Hey Jealousy? Virgil isn’t. I bet he’s wondering why I went stomping out of bed a minute ago. I’m not sleeping, but I’m not mad.

Again at you. Now the Day Job. FUCKING DAY JOB! Pardon my language. Another 5-hour shot, so I’ll be awake at least till 7:20 tonight. Becoming the “Village Idiot” Braxton. Where do I even begin? So I’m waiting for the morning Huddle to start. These have steadily worsened over the past two weeks, but today… Well, one of the bosses talked about me smiling. I’m a fucking joke there with a fucking grin. B, how we would talk. Anyway, it could have been a crack about the dog tag I always wear with our picture on it. I’m smiling, then. Or is it I’m so fucking weak in that place? I grabbed onto it, asking for your strength and forgiveness. Hell! Your Rage, B III.

I remember you being angry at the whole world, and I know why. You weren’t mad at your Ma; I mean. “Mother is God in the eyes of a child.” You love your Aunt Carolina. Braxton, your Aunt, is good to both of us. But who I’m surrounded by always… Braxton, part of it, I’ll say, is jealousy. I’ve seen a lot of success these days from others. There’s the fact that I haven’t started my Christmas reading. Crying over another dog, B. NaNoWriMo is over, and I didn’t write one single word for it. Published anything? Nope. I’m wasting money. That chicken sandwich today. Oh, I’m going Karen if I’m not lazy. But hating myself for killing you; that’s enough. To B Enraged Virgil

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Saga 149 ~Here B Dragons Virgil~

I’ve never been on a cruise before, but I’ve been on a boat here or there, “Disney World.” I like fishing with my Granddaddy (the same man who says he doesn’t know me anymore.) And drowning is a messed up way to die. But “Here B Dragons Virgil.”

Sunday, November 27, 2022

Saga 149 ~Here B Dragons Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now. And money buys power. We can get all up in “The Untouchables.” But that’s not your problem.

No, not when you’re picking up dog shit on the concrete landing in the backyard. Perhaps you’re being a bit harsh with yourself today, which is sad. Nowhere to go and no one to see. So you’re deciding to be an asshole today. Anger beats the alternative. I was sad last night. And you? B would hate this. You always feel like crying over him. Only today, it wasn’t even thoughts of him that brought out your first tears. Asshole! Weakling? Still crying over your dead kid. No wonder some sailors took to the blue. Yesterday, where do I begin? Was it the fact that you still owe $2,541.00? Investment? There’s wasting time on so many games. Oh, and books. There remain Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING World War Z by Max Brooks
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

What was I looking for in these things? What are you looking for? Salvation, Redemption? Every week, I find myself wishing I could keep you right here. Sort of like with little Virgil. Hell! To be warm in bed. You keep imagining Braxton’s idea of Elysium… A bed in the yard, surrounded by food. A place Braxton could lie in the sun and then cuddle. Then there’s that need for him to get out into the world. If anything, so he wouldn’t hate it so much. Like father, like son. Whatever the Hell is out there? I survived the worst week Day Job wise, but you (sigh). There’s this song, “The world won’t get no better if we just let it be.” Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Will You Love Me?: The Rescue Dog That Rescued Me
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures FOR My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap) Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

I wish these were only words. Dammit! What am I talking about? They are gibberish. But you’ve seen the monsters outside that door. I was drowning. Inevitably it’s your turn. When one door closes, another opens… You’re starting to see that with Virgil Vivi. FEAR. You will be plenty anxious to enter the next room when you know what awaits you. The Day Job, Braxton’s Room, Bedroom, to the back yard. When was the last time I opened a door, and it was where I felt safe, or I wasn’t falling asleep? And still, nothing out there is worse than you. Your existence doesn’t need a map because, at the end of the day… No matter where you’ll set sail ANYTIME. Here B Dragons Virgil

665 Days Without B III, Day 106 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 148 ~Don’t Be B Virgil~

“You’re not my (son), and I sure as hell ain’t your dad.” Hell! If anything, I wish I could be my son. B III was the best man I know and wasn’t even “a man.” And now there’s Virgil, myself, in existence. We endure and survive. Don’t Be B Virgil.

Saturday, November 26, 2022

Saga 148 ~Don’t Be B Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now. And how I wish I had been when Braxton was lying around. Ain’t he still, Lunalesca?

It doesn’t stop me from being a lazy, lustful loser, now does it? “I feel stupid,” as the song goes. How STUPID is that? You know how I told Lady Sophia I needed new books? Um, I cut off the laptop without choosing a damn thing. Lady Lu, I did sample Ibram X. Kendi’s work “How to Be an Antiracist.” Sad, I wouldn’t have thought of it if it wasn’t for a Kindle Challenge. Hell! I might read it because Ted Cruz is such an asshole. Hating “Antiracist Baby?” But no promises. I need to improve at keeping those Lunalesca. Disgusted at myself for the moment, but we’ll get to that. Like writing for NaNoWriMo? I wasted this entire month, and if Braxton could see?

I haven’t been reading anything on reincarnation. And with the Kindle Challenge and some Christmas Erotica. Oh, that’s the last thing I need with not keeping my pants on, Lu. Not for longer than a day, Lu. I rather wank one out than get fucked at the Day Job daily. Again wasn’t I telling Lady Sophia that it hasn’t been that bad these days? What! Because I can still sit down? The things that we can use to. And then, of course, the new guy. Virgil Vivi is nothing like Braxton Barks, as much as I wish it. Was my faith not strong enough to bring back my son? Do I need more to cry about today other than lateness? Lunalesca, sleeping the day away.

The only thing 2V and B III have in common. Because what else is there to do as I sit? When Braxton was known as Neo, I was about “his training.” Me playing Morpheus? Now with Virgil, he’s in Braxton’s room as I speak, waiting for me. Training, Loving? Lunalesca, I haven’t told him as such because, to be honest, I don’t. The very day I got him didn’t I count all the reasons? Braxton says this couldn’t be more “black and white daddy.” The color around his eyes. How I love Braxton’s eyes. But seeing who I am? Inevitable. I’m not a good man. Braxton believed that, and where is he now? Virgil’s alive. Please be my Braxton! But then. Don’t Be B Virgil

664 Days Without B III, Day 105 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 147 ~They’ll B Books Virgil~

It wasn’t a dinner to write home about. But I’m not a bastard. I thanked my Ma and, of course, shared with Virgil. Who knows, maybe we could have our own full Thanksgiving meal if I were writing books or reading those of merit. They’ll B Books Virgil

Friday, November 25, 2022

Saga 147 ~They’ll B Books Virgil~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now, or I will be if any of my books get turned into a movie. Right, NaNoWriMo…

I’ve missed the whole damn thing at this point. And as far as what I’ve been writing… Well, the most positive thing I can think of is this. The past two days at the Day Job haven’t been the most horrible in recent memory. But it’s better not to talk about today lest I cry. More like flying off into a RAGE. Considering a few recent “stress releases.” I’m hopeless. Ok, back to positivity. I did finish reading World War Z Thursday. A Kindle Challenge. But that means one more thing I have to do today. Finding something else to read. And Lady Sophia, it’s getting around that time. The books I read over the Christmas Holiday (sigh); we’ll get to that. But my education…

Hell! Like I ever took that seriously before. If only I had done so. There are so many idiots making billions and ruling the world. Not to mention all the people making money for anything and everything. That is another reason I’m heavy into Audiobooks. Succubus Lord? How many times has it been now, Lady Sophia, reading about Jacob and his Harem? Sophia, I have plenty of books about harems. Only reading my writings and musings, ha. And as I said, we’re approaching Christmas, which means Christmas Erotica. It’s a little bit funny; I’m unsure how to feel about that new movie, Violent Night. Christmas sex? Um, yes, please. But violence? Especially since I like Home Alone and Die Hard. Hard, something I don’t want.

Well, only when I’m in a position to have some girl do something about it, Lady Sophia. But I’d give it all up to go and read a book with Braxton napping away. Memories, Sophia. The turkey dinners Braxton and I would get from my Ma. In comparison to yesterday, Thanksgiving indeed. But aren’t I a grown-ass man? Yeah, I’m nothing to write about. And again, the Day Job could have been a million times worse. And if I wrote something, anything, of merit… It always comes back to this. B III would be alive. The unbridled avarice of his own turkey. And A for Archie wouldn’t have become V for Virgil. Is that mean? Virgil will have a book someday. They’ll B Books Virgil

663 Days Without B III, Day 104 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 146 ~Thankful B Cause… Virgil~

Happy Thanksgiving? Cue Karlee Grey as a Pilgrim. And a “Native” Giggity. Is that Racist? Well, I have bigger fish to fry or a turkey. I’m wondering whether my Ma will send one for Virgil. And then there’s the Day Job (sigh). Thankful B Cause… Virgil

Thursday, November 24, 2022

Saga 146 ~Thankful B Cause… Virgil~

662 Days Without B III, Day 103 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? How about, what are you thankful for? My eyes are open, so you know me.

The better to see you with my boy. Except I don’t. New glasses and all. I swear I got sick when I first put them on. Or was it that I saw the old man that remains, Braxton? Hell! I believe I can see the future… as the song goes. If that were true, you’d still be alive. It always comes back to that, doesn’t it? B, it leads me to a bunch of questions for you, ha. Are you thankful that you’re wherever and not here? That I keep your memory alive, even if it’s only in my grief? What about the fact that I’m not alone? It is Virgil’s First Thanksgiving. You love your grandma’s cooking; I haven’t heard from her about food.

But B, I’m time-traveling today, but we will finish talking tomorrow. But what about now? Can I stay in the moment? That’s the problem. The moment always hurts. Your past? Braxton, when I think about the last few hours… I’m disgusted with myself. Private Time. I have these new glasses again, but I’ve been all sorts of woozy. To see the world any clearer? Yeah, that’s exactly what I need, isn’t it? Existing in such a place B III. Dammit! Then there’s Thursday, um, your today. B III, the Humiliations Galore, what will they be? Then again, I am thankful. For moments I have the chance to somehow, someway, become. You know the man you believed I was for so long. Suddenly I see, right?

Whether that’s the result of glasses, “gunk,” or gorging myself on tacos and nacho fries. Clarity, Unforgettable, The “Best Friend” I ever had. That’s what you are, my Little B. Always and Forever, I’ll be thankful that I was/am your Dad. That’s what transcends time. Only again, you want to know about today? Did I ever think I was so tired because of my eyes? I’m still all pumped up on 5-hour ENERGY. Why can’t I see to be thankful? Because I know how it all ends unless I do something. I have Virgil, but he ain’t you, B III. My “faith” hasn’t run out on that, though. Not yet… But you’re asking for one thing, though. Two; thankful for Yabbos. Thankful B Cause… Virgil

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Saga 142 ~B Lying Sometimes Virgil~

I can’t stand liars. Looking in a mirror… I’m about to fall as I can’t look at myself. Telling the truth. I don’t live; I exist. I take pleasure as I’m in constant pain. And yet, for V and B, it is/was the best day ever. B Lying Sometimes Virgil

Sunday, November 20, 2022

Saga 142 ~B Lying Sometimes Virgil~

To Will:
I AM a Billionaire right now. Which means I’ve had to lie a lot until I can’t anymore. Because it’s your existence now.

Well, at 12:00AM. So uh, you’re the one that decided. And for that, sir, I salute you. I was perfectly ready to lie yesterday. And Hell, before you pat yourself on the back. You’re going to lie in a few. In one way or another, it’s all in your head or not. Um yeah, you failed. Which is worse? The fact that I couldn’t keep it in my pants after everything. I’m not one to make it “special.” What guy is, to be honest? With me, it was a big-titty brunette. Reading though? Learning, education. You, friend, are about to lie about reading a short story because you can’t deal with the thought of my failure. How some things end. Like these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING “Wool” Part 2, The Graphic Novel
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 038 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

How about how things ended with B III? You can never forget your son. Though again, you’re all caught up in Triple X. You’re telling yourself everything will be okay. Oh no, not this week. At this rate, inevitably, you’ll find a way to hate all fifty-two. Well, it beats hating every single day… There’s the week Braxton died. B’s Birthday Week. Um, Father’s Day and his birthday. You remain a “man” who can’t take care of himself. At all! Bills lying somewhere. There’s The Menu and One Way Out… but we’ll get to that. There’s your existence day, ha. Should you add “Gotcha Day,” where you met Virgil? Your betrayal of B is complete. There’s so much; I cleared my head. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING To Be Determined “Chills and Thrills.”
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Trying to get back on point. The Menu and One Way Out. I’m thinking about that one chef who wanted to be the CHEF in the movie The Menu. And when he realized he couldn’t have that life… BOOM. Then there’s Andor Ep. 1X10 “One Way Out. In the prison break scene, when Kino Loy leads the escape, but then, upon getting out, he can’t swim. Existence is fucking confusing; I know. But the point you want to make is this. You’re lying to yourself about everything being okay. Look at the world in the few hours you’ve been awake. Twitter, Trump, JDF, more shootings, and disgusting fathers. Fucking swear. Braxton was tired, and you’re keeping Virgil from the outside world. B Lying Sometimes Virgil

658 Days Without B III, Day 099 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 141 ~ Don’t B Dumb Virgil~

A man said, “men are idiots.” I tell M Anime that plenty. B III and I were/are for 15 years, but we understand each other. I don’t get V. Or the “man” I face in the mirror. Yet the village idiot is asked to teach, train, and talk. Don’t B Dumb Virgil

Saturday, November 19, 2022

Saga 141 ~ Don’t B Dumb Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now. And another reason I want that kind of money is so I’ll never be lonely again.

“And every day I wake up, with a naked lady,” as the song goes. Battle Cry (feat, Just Blaze, in case I forget, ha-ha. What week was it I complained of being all lonely, dear Lu? At the end of this one… I have come to know that there are worse things. Oh, B III’s still dead? Ain’t that the truth? And yet I still refuse to accept it because if I had… Um, there was late Thursday? I picked up V and studied him a bit. As I did 98 days ago. How I failed Lu? That’s what this week has been all about. My loneliness hasn’t gone anywhere. I’m not jerking off as Virgil stays in Braxton’s room. As I said, worse things.

Lady Lunalesca… being looked at as stupid is something. To be stupid is fucked up. Stupidity, to me, is a virus, the worst kind. An addiction, obsession, an infection I have. Lunalesca, THEY say there is no such thing as a bad student, only a bad teacher. I look back at Braxton and me. How many times have I said I learned to speak Braxton? I knew when it was okay to sleep. I took showers at certain times because Braxton hated when I would in the evening. My muscle memory. When I go get a drink, I grab Braxton’s bowl. And now I have all this knowledge for a future that doesn’t exist. V is not B, I don’t think. Still, the name… Virgil.

V’s not guiding me; we are both stumbling through this Hell together, asking, now what? And it would be one thing to destroy our lives, Lunalesca, but people don’t understand. Take any zombie film, and I would instead die than risk spreading the virus to anyone else. And that’s stupidity. I’m a fucking monster, and then people want me, infecting. Lunalesca, you saw what B III was and how dare I do that to V. Train the dog, hmm, Lu? He doesn’t do stairs or potty on the pad, And Hell, the only sounds he makes are hacking up a lung or crying. Why? Because he doesn’t understand? Lunalesca, same. But we keep going like slaves because IGNORANCE IS STRENGTH. No! Don’t B Dumb Virgil

657 Days Without B III, Day 098 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 140 ~Vitamin B, Not V~

If I were writing out my vitamin regimen, that would be something. But no, the usual. I miss my son. Work sucks, I know, as the song goes. I’m always horny. Discombobulation, depression, death, I fear, thanks, Yoda. Things within me, Vitamin B, Not V

Friday, November 18, 2022

Saga 140 ~Vitamin B, Not V~

Hey Lady Sophia,
I AM a Billionaire right now, which means I can buy plenty of books, the good drugs… um, women? That’s not right.

But it’s something I’ve been thinking about for a bit. With all of my medical issues… yeah, I’m always horny, as well. M Anime, Cherry cue (homer drool). If I had the cash, My Lady? Can’t buy me, love, right? But what is it they say about an adoption fee? I look at V here… Only I still want Braxton back. Should I read another novel on reincarnation, perhaps grieving? If anything, I should be asleep right this second. But the meaning of my WORD? Sophia, I said I would never get back into 5-hour ENERGY, but here I am, wide awake and raring to go. I can’t tell you why I went back to buying them. Hell! The world sucks, and to torture myself?

Was it reading my last paycheck and going nuts? The money never seems to be enough for everything. As you can see, I’m time-traveling. It’s Thursday, November 17, 2022. Oh. There was reading the Day Job schedule, and I reached this conclusion. Call it a new life goal. I want a job, a career… Fuck it, a life that I can stay in bed all day. Again with the sex. It’s the only thing that keeps me awake despite everything else. I need more wakefulness, ha. Yet I don’t want it. Every night I go to bed hoping I’ll never have to open my eyes again. Who would take care of Virgil? When it was Braxton, it was only hoping I don’t go to jail.

What? I’d have time to read, and if the prison movies I’ve seen are any indication… (shudders). The one constant thing is the Humiliations Galore. Awake for that, Sophia? This whole year has been about my health. From my fucked up ears to a bacterial infection and my broken glasses. Stuff going into my body. Only I rather focus on putting a particular part of my body into things… people. Sex toys, women? I should stop talking, I know. Tomorrow will be worse than today. Sacrifice today for tomorrow’s betterment. From some motivational speech. The things that go into my head; Braxton in my heart. And now energy drinks, so the words will flow out of me. But nothing for NaNoWriMo? Vitamin B, Not V.

656 Days Without B III, Day 097 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Saga 139 ~B Hold, V’s Place~

Nothing’s gonna change my world… but until I have one, I must exist in this one. And the world keeps on turning. B III’s bed is on the other side. V doesn’t curl up like a pancake. More like he goes all over. But really, where am I? B Hold V’s Place.

Thursday, November 17, 2022

Saga 139 ~B Hold, V’s Place~

655 Days Without B III, Day 096 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? You know this week and the next for me… It ain’t right but to write.

The things I forget. Not you, Triple B, never you. Everything remains exactly the same. Okay, so that’s a lie. Braxton, see why I never told you… EVERYTHING. 90, 98%? Inevitable. Should I survive the rest of the day… Wednesday, November 16, 2022? I’ll be madder. None of this is Virgil’s fault, of course. Hell! Not when I threw out your last can of food. Or when I was sure you were haunting me. I would find a toy or bandanna thrown about somewhere. Is that a point in V’s favor? I was telling Echo that V ain’t you, but? Well, again, it could be the time of the year. If I wasn’t so busy with… no, not for you. I haven’t told Virgil Vivi.

So humiliating I should go back to talking to Inspector Echo. I’m not Virgil’s Daddy. Only I find myself playing that role again, and I want to remember how it was with us, B III. Didn’t I write a whole ass book about it? And yet I have to face this week and the next. Anyway, let me get to the point. So I let Virgil sleep on the bed. You had your side. How I miss that. We would be back to back. Your constant vigilance of the bedroom door. When you weren’t at your post. I’ve noticed I find myself at the edge of the bed every morning, and Virgil is dead center. Even when I’m writing, Virgil Vivi takes up space. (Sigh)

I had to move your bed over by the bathroom. You hated waiting for me to get out of the shower. The thing is, I saw Virgil sniffing around your bed, and I yelled. Virgil knows. That bed is where you died. And here comes today’s bout of tears. He stays away from there for the most part. I’m still mad about your pillow; he pooped on it. And I destroyed it; it’s in the closet. V has your food/water bowls. A few of your toys, too; it ain’t right. And now, his first Thanksgiving here. Your favorite day next to your birthday, I know. It’s not his place to be you. Mine to be a Dad? Everything has its place. B Hold, V’s Place.

Always and Forever,
Your Dad