Holding my boys’ leashes, holding my woman’s hand, holding my kids who can’t walk yet. Hell! I would settle for holding enough cash to afford a proper meal. But I’m busy holding all this FEAR because it’s not selling. Like my book ha… Aisles B, V, M.
Tuesday, September 16, 2025
Journey 077 ~Aisles B, V, M~
Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Enough to take “The Long Walk” down the aisle to wait for you. I’m waiting.
“I had hoped we could have made it [to] the altar.” M Anime, Aug 24th
You’re waiting. Still waiting for me to stop playing Charlie Kirk. You know, saying STUPID sh*t about… How do THEY say these days, being “unalived?” I wonder if Inspector Echo thinks that a sin. Why should I care? I’m not a religious man, my love.
Once upon a time, I was an Atheist. Then I became a father for the first time. B III’s dad.
And as I contemplate the things I need to buy to save my life. My Old Man called. But I’ve been thinking about places where I feel Braxton’s soul the most. One of those places is an aisle in PetSmart, next to Virgil’s food and Banfield, where Braxton passed away.
Love, I should have joined him and not just watched.
I watched and waited and walked that aisle alone, carrying what was left of existence. And you walked down the aisle with or without your father. I’ve forgotten, maybe.
Beloved, all I know is you were coming to claim what I had left. All that I was willing to give to you freely. Is it too much? Today is Friday, September 12, 2025. Effing heavy.
Darling, I’ve been weighed down in this chair all day long except for emergencies. Ha! Again with “The Long Walk.” “He just kept picking them up and laying them down.”
Our kids, my feet, and I want to say my FEAR. No FEAR is the one thing I don’t need to shop for today. It’s free, unlike me. I can’t.
“You have been weighed, you have been measured, and you have been found wanting.”
Daniel 5:27, The Book of Daniel
Even when I sit down to watch a movie. I hated my childhood, but to be as carefree as a kid again, going to Video Express or Blockbuster. Am I showing my age, “Forty-One” ha!
“Ben-Hur,” “The Long Walk,” and, to add a movie to the list, “Exit 8.” I’m “The Lost Man.” And I look at you going down every aisle, hallway, and threshold, and I close my eyes and wonder. Are you the anomaly? Should I turn around and run away, my love?
“Give me one reason to stay here, and I’ll turn right back around.” It’s what you’re singing to me. And even if I found that reason, is it diapers, milk, and bread, or a drink? Myself? Aisles B, V, M.
1689 Days Without B III, Day 1130 of Virgil’s Arrival
B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will
