Am I afraid I might die? I’d spend eternity looking for B. And my head is a cruel place, the 9th Circle will try its best. The fact that my son’s cold body was turned to ash. And with Virgil and my girl, “I See Fire.” Braxton’s Cold, Virgil’s Code.
Tuesday, March 31, 2026
Journey 273 ~Braxton’s Cold, Virgil’s Code~
Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Even when I’m sick, skeevy, and especially when I’m scared out of my mind. Now?
Let me just say, I’ll feel ‘better’ when this effing month is over. I’ll love you more? I do that anyway. You know the man that you married. And every minute you choose to stay.
Preferably on your knees… I had to go there, didn’t I? Eww! But one more reason to like sex. You on your knees, hands and knees, bent over, on your back, on your belly, etc.
Seriously, am I so horny this morning after I… after we… um we’re “Gettin’ Jiggy Wit” Like Dennis Hof, I’m always looking for the next party until I’m ‘physically’ unable.
However, the question is how I feel today. Let’s stick with the physical. Dearest love.
Today, like most, I wish I felt like my Braxton.
“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000
Which one would you rather listen to? Me talking about how much I want to do you, my love… or fantasizing about us doing you, me, or us. Or me talking about doing myself so
So I can join my firstborn. How about Virgil still being here? And you? Our kids who may actually have a chance at joining the human race. And that in itself is “Killing Me Softly.”
Honestly, comedy comes in three, and today I’m waiting on three things with 99 Problems.
- I’m waiting to join my Braxton with bated breath
- I’m waiting for my existence to be utterly destroyed
- I’m waiting to do something to save myself somehow.
“We’re allowed to make a lot of mistakes in our lives, except the mistake that destroys us.”
― Paulo Coelho
“It’s an awesome feeling to know you are about to change someone’s life forever.”
―
Homer had the right idea. “Tomorrow When The War Began.”
And here I am crying again. Yes, I’m in pain, and like Katniss Everdeen, you pull the best move, you know. Am I sick to enjoy the pain I inflict on you. Or sicker to admit that I need you for my mental, physical, and emotional pain. It breaks the bro code, guy code, hmm.
Gale: I knew you’d do that
Katniss: How I didn’t.
Gale: Cause I’m in pain. That’s the only way that I can get your attention
― The Hunger Games: Mockingjay
To say that I long to fall as my B did. “Baby, I Love You,” just leave me the eff alone. And at the same time, I beg you to stay with me during this “Mad Season.” Or Hell if I run, to follow me. I’m sick one minute, but A Man Provides in the next. It’s the code, forever.
That’s what I promised. The way. Braxton’s Cold, Virgil’s Code
1885 Days Without B III, Day 1326 of Virgil’s Arrival
B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will
