Last week, I came up with four options. But even with calling in, Humiliations Galore. And I didn’t have a heart attack… I did have a Panic Attack. A little one. Speaking of which, now B III and 2-V have seen me like that. Braxton, Virgil’s 4-H Club.
Thursday, November 27, 2025
Journey 149 ~Braxton, Virgil’s 4-H Club~
1761 Days Without B III, Day 1202 of Virgil’s Arrival
Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Happy Thanksgiving? Happy Food Day? Happy Turkey Day. Let’s hope grandma shows up with food…
Are you hungry, or is it just me? And no, that isn’t one of the H’s today, my little Braxton.
No, today I was thinking, in no particular order, Have, Heal, Help, and Heaven. And for that I needed a cult… Your Dad had to look up the 4-H club this morning, and what about yesterday? Whatever did I do yesterday? Well, if anything, your little brother V was happy.
There’s another H-word. We don’t do HAPPY in this household. But what about the 26th?
Okay. Do you remember me talking to Inspector Echo about flipping a coin? Heads, I go to the Day Job; tails, I stay with Virgil… Heads. Heads, I stay the whole day, or tails, I tell the ASM to her face, I can’t work. Heads. So you know what your Dad did, don’t you, B?
“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)
Coward that I am, I called in. And then what?
Not that son. I didn’t HAVE a good day. I didn’t HEAL. I might have HELPED the neighbor screw me over about the broken fence. Braxton, I dreamed of HEAVEN.
“I believe death is only a door. One closes, and another opens. If I were to imagine Heaven, I would imagine a door opening. And he would be waiting for me there.”
― Cloud Atlas
Seriously, Braxton, is that where you are? Anytime I think about what lies across the Rainbow Bridge, I imagine food at the head, one of the sides, and the foot of the bed. And you’re waiting for me on that empty side, and I crawl up beside you. That’s heavenly.
Maybe it’s “Heavily” that I ask “pardon, goddess of the night.” Too much Shakespeare, huh, Braxton? My idea of Heaven.
Well, besides listening to Maurissa Tancharoen and Jed Whedon sing. I swear, Braxton, why do you have me thinking about Much Ado About Nothing” all of a sudden? B III.
Maybe you’re telling me to “Sigh No More?” We’ll see if I survive this week. I don’t know B, I just don’t know. And you know what’s effed up? When you “passed,” I didn’t take time off the Day Job. I didn’t miss a day. Hell! I waited till the end of that week to take you to the vet on that Friday. By Sunday… Anyway, I’m worried about Friday. And should I still have the Day Job on Wednesday? If I have it, if I help, not heal, or go to Heaven. Always a “Possibility.” Braxton, Virgil’s 4-H Club
“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)
Always and Forever,
Your Dad
