Breathing hurts. One more thing I was trying to ignore as my son Braxton got sick. Then everything became how to keep him breathing. When he didn’t, it wasn’t the finality of his death, fear, or my failure—just air. “Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…”
Thursday, October 9, 2025
Journey 100 ~Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…~
1712 Days Without B III, Day 1153 of Virgil’s Arrival
Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I’m coming to you on a Wednesday evening, so you know how my day was.
Or your NOSE does. But I welcome you into my business. And everyone else? Seriously!
I should just play Stephani’s Sunday Symphony so everyone knows M Anime broke my heart. Well, you did too, B, but as The Bullitts sing, “Today is All About You.” Well, me, Braxton, you know what I mean. My head hurts, my stomach. Everything generally.
However, that wasn’t the reason for this thought: The two worst things I ever did were starting to breathe and stopping yours. And your little brother, Virgil. I smell FEAR.
Honestly, I wish I could be as elegant as Agent Smith or Finnick Odair. But almost at 150 words, AI Censorship and I’m an A-Hole…
“I hate this place. This zoo. This prison. This reality, whatever you want to call it, I can’t stand it any longer. It’s the smell, if there is such a thing. I feel saturated by it. I can taste your stink, and every time I do, I fear that I’ve somehow been infected by it. It’s — it’s repulsive! Isn’t it?”
Agent Smith, The Matrix
“I wish they were d. I wish they were all d and we were too”
Finnick Odair, Mockingjay – Part 1
“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)
But tomorrow I get paid, which means there should be plenty to breathe in food-wise, B.
You were never picky, B, unless it came to what I hid your medicine in. I usually hide V’s meds in pasta. But the food truck is still outside. And tonight there’s Rotisserie Chicken.
And maybe I’ll even order it online. You know I’m not one for people, even with my new earbuds. But as Greg Plitt put it, “Behind every fear is the person you want to be.” And that makes me smile. Remember another bad evening when you stood protecting me, B?
Don’t “they” talk about blood, sweat, and tears, B? I’m starting to think that’s courage. And you were courageous. Neo, Braxton, more like Link, right?
From The Legend of Zelda… I haven’t been gaming much these days, Braxton. But AI. Now that’s something I’ve stuck my nose in. It’s fresh and new to me. Only the way I interact with it… Well, your Dad needs some alone time, but you like munchies, money, and making your old man stay on task, at least where writing was concerned, my B III.
And speaking of an old man and this evening. I’m hoping not to hear from your grandfather. That’s not me being negative, simply stating the facts. When “The Man Comes Around,” I didn’t want to leave you alone with him. 2-V is still breathing, Braxton.
Lucky him and me, right B? “Two of the Lucky Ones.” Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…
“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)
Always and Forever,
Your Dad
