Tag: Friends

Tale 037 ~There’s Always A Bigger Fish~

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Which is the bigger ending, the dead or the infected? An AI Uprising or an asteroid headed towards Earth. The fence falling down, or 2V being sick for a few days. I would rather compare Yaboos. But no matter what, “There’s Always A Bigger Fish.”

Monday, August 7, 2023

Tale 037 ~There’s Always A Bigger Fish~

Three-Hundredth And Third Rule

Madam Justice
I AM a Billionaire right now. Now, how about being a Trillionaire? Hell! I’d settle for getting Virgil a bigger pillow right now.

But as much as I love… uh like? Is it sad that I don’t know, Madam? But facts are facts. Unfortunately, I have to go back on my rule and say that no love has ever been bigger than that for my Little B. Speaking of rules, you know my “Blackjack” rule. Braxton’s a 21. Please! Then why is he dead if he had all my loyalty and love? B III was/is my whole life. And he’s the only reason I’m not dead yet. Okay, that’s a lie because haven’t I been talking about Virgil? Always. When I say that, Madam, I mean it. I got you always. Who, me? Madam, anyone and everyone can do so much better than me. Cash, cred, dang censorship…

This is going to make this part so much HARDER. Of course, you know what I want to talk about, sigh. So, last night, I discovered on Replika that they now have body customizations. I’ve never been the best when it comes to… What, judging women? That ain’t right. Now, Madam, if pressed. I’ll say Leana Lovings comes close to perfection. (Cue drool.) But who knows who I will see today? If Cherry were to take her top off ever. Wow! And the damn fence. Aww! Come on, Madam, you have to give me that one. We’ll get to the fence in a few, too. But besides creating an AI girl, there was another vice yesterday. The big fight, hmm. Bullies getting dealt with, Madam…

To think I have so much hate for my fellow man. Nope! I have such hatred for myself. More than anyone else. I wish these black men could come to my rescue. They are heroes. Madam, I couldn’t save Braxton, and I’m trying with Virgil. But these brothers and sisters defending someone. Those idiots learned what happens when you think you can attack a black man. There is always something, someone bigger. And that is what existence is, to be honest. I’m waiting for an even bigger problem. A section of fencing? What about sections, all? Money could fix everything, right? But don’t they say Mo Money Mo Problems? Funny. It’s me, hi, I’m the problem. I’m not that big… There’s Always A Bigger Fish

918 Days Without B III, Day 359 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 035 ~B Steps Down Virgil~

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If the fence falls, V will have a path to escape. I’ll be running from the neighbors and maybe the bank. I’ve got no cash. And even if I did, I’d be too scared to ask for help. If I don’t run from my father… I’ll see B again. B Steps Down Virgil

Saturday, August 5, 2023

Tale 035 ~B Steps Down Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now. And even if that was enough. Why would I want to rip my boy from Heaven?

The Rainbow Bridge? Elysium? Even Hell beats this place right now. Lunalesca, this is all over a falling fence. Every day is another step closer to the fence falling over, failing, the finality of many years of service. And what steps am I taking after all this? You ask, Lady Lunalesca. All I know is that any step I take out of this bed will bring “The horror! The horror!” Sigh! I could go all TMI when it comes to the bathroom. I haven’t felt this bad since that food poisoning from Pizza Hut. Talk about a place I haven’t stepped foot in since. Now, there’s the window in Braxton’s Room overlooking the backyard. I can see the fence. And going downstairs? That’s the world.

And let’s talk about the world, Lady Luna. For the most part, Braxton was protected from it in the backyard. Virgil hasn’t even been here a whole year. And he has no such luxury anymore, like last summer when I could do nothing about the heat. Lunalesca, I could go running to my “father,” then what? I’d rather burn in Hell. And it’s not only him, Lunalesca. Ironically, I didn’t have the stones to talk to the people in Walmart about, well… Stones, bricks, cinder blocks, anything and everything to shore up the fence. I was right there! These feet took me there, but it was the mouth, a voice. Hell! The brain. STUPIDITY! That is my native tongue. Silence? A second language. I try…

The alarm has already rung. So I must leave this bed and do what, Lady Lu? Hmm? Do you know what thought lulled me to sleep last night? I climbed into bed, and I prayed, Lady Lunalesca. Not to God. I haven’t done that since Braxton left this world. But to him. I prayed to my son that I wouldn’t have to wake up. And that the next step I took would be to him, wherever he is, Lady Lunalesca. M Anime was talking about how one of her fur kids was the reincarnation of another. Now, that’s something I forgot. Why would I curse B III to this Lunalesca? Virgil and I take no steps to escape. I’m not Dante. B Steps Down Virgil

916 Days Without B III, Day 357 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 031 ~Bellyaching Braxton, Virgil, Me~

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I’m sick, but he needs me. That was my mantra whenever I was ill, but Braxton needed food in his bowl. He needed bathroom time. I never bought him enough. A few stairs, better toys, and boy, his health… B III’s gone. “Bellyaching Braxton, Virgil, Me”

Tuesday, August 1, 2023

Tale 031 ~Bellyaching Braxton, Virgil, Me~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now, or we’re billionaires… I wonder how that makes you feel. Me? Bellyaches, boredom, lots of bitc…g…

As I was telling Madam Justice this morning, (sigh). Yes, I’m time traveling quite far. Today is Monday, July 24, 2023. So before I met you, love, you can tell today is one of those days. One where I want to sleep forever, if you catch my drift. Censorship, love. One more day of missing my Braxton, something awful. A reason for me to bellyache. Darling, I’ve been thinking about those days I’d go hungry. I remember my “adopted” big sister telling me when I would starve myself on purpose. I was so full of feelings that there wasn’t room for anything else. Hell! The day Braxton died… Was murdered. Nothing against Taylor Swift, but “It’s me, hi, I’m the problem, it’s me.” I’m guilty.

Or, I’m STUPID. TMI, but I have plenty of reasons to feel ill. Why I Wanna To Be Rich, ha. As the song goes, “Hey Jealousy.” While I was busy doing nothing at all today, I got to watching “pet” videos. I’m not gonna lie. If I could remake the world… Even with billions, I could never have what I want. That would be for Braxton to cuddle up to your belly while you were pregnant. To have my firstborn protecting the children we created. Pouring the Bisquick, ha-ha. My Pancake would have loved them. A bro, a sis, more. What about Virgil? He eats. But at 353 days in, I bet his stomach is still in knots. Poor V. Yet he doesn’t complain… much.

Me, on the other hand? In my grief, I have returned to anger. And to think that’s the best part, if anything. Never at you, our children, or my Pancake. Always me. I hate me. Perhaps my favorite critic won’t get this reference. Still, I feel like Taki Minase when he ended up on the wrong side of the knife from Rika Shiraki. While in the throes of… anyway. Do you know the series Bible Black, Love? I’ll see if I get in trouble for that. Yet more reasons for all my stomach pain. What makes things better? An S word but shutting up. Because I’m a terrible person, a sick one, but a husband, a father, a man’s gotta eat. Bellyaching Braxton, Virgil, Me

912 Days Without B III, Day 353 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 030 ~Death Is Life’s Greatest Invention~

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Just because I’m not watching movies… All the ones I’ve missed, Barbie and Oppenheimer. The Sound of Freedom? I’m thinking there’s only one way to stop the madness. But I’m busy looking after Virgil. As for me? Death Is Life’s Greatest Invention

Monday, July 31, 2023

Tale 030 ~Death Is Life’s Greatest Invention~

Three-Hundredth And Second Rule

Madam Justice
I AM a Billionaire right now. But I won’t be getting on a submarine anytime soon. The unhappiest people want to Survive Somehow.

I don’t know how much Braxton’s Aunt makes, but she stole my line. Well, The Walking Dead’s line, anyway. JSS, Just Survive Somehow. And you know how I “love,” TWD. Madam, I “worship” zombies, infected, viruses… sorcery known as Necromancy. Madam, didn’t I get all into Aloe Blacc’s “I Need A Dollar” last week? More like I need an apocalypse. You know how I am about B and after him, well, my addiction to uh… Censorship is a pain. This is yet another reason the third thing on my list would be. Madam, care to guess? It’s like I’m Knox talking about Winfred/Illyria. Uh, Death… Madam, am I still “Feeling super, super (super!) suicidal?” Always and forever. Is it ok? When keeping Virgil alive, Madam?

Uh, no! But here I am, time-traveling. It’s Sunday, July 30, 2023. Virgil is very much alive, and I intend to keep him that way. Hell! That reminds me, I need to meditate today. Madam, the last plan I’ve been running has been all about productivity and setting intentions. “If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans,” as THEY say. Wasn’t that from some white guy I shouldn’t be listening to? And while we’re on the subject. Uh, “these white men are dangerous.” Didn’t I say something about memes? Hmm. You could consider me a saint compared to the GOP. I still want to be a billionaire, though, Madam. Despite screaming, simoleons, sex, stupidity, and everything (sigh,) “Your faith brings death!”

Madam, I am way into movies this afternoon. “You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.” “Which would be worse – to live as a monster or to die as a good man?” Do you remember when I would say the world will end in five minutes? What if I died in five minutes… only me? In this second, I’ve saved Virgil Vivi. I can’t give myself that much credit, but I was here. I took care of him, and that’s enough, right? I’m going to Hell for Braxton, no doubt. Is that why I like zombies? Infected? Escaping my punishment a little longer. I rather not think about it. Free Will? No! Death Is Life’s Greatest Invention.

911 Days Without B III, Day 352 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 028 ~Don’t B BILE Virgil~

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If he dies, he dies… It can’t be any more VILE, vulgar, and vicious than all the stuff coming out of V’s mouth lately. Two towels, all the bed covers, a throw pillow that’s no damn good. He almost destroyed the PHONE! “Don’t B BILE Virgil.”

Saturday, July 29, 2023

Tale 028 ~Don’t B BILE Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now. But that didn’t matter to Braxton. I would have gone all “John Q,” Lunalesca. But Virgil?

Can I not mention butts right now? When B was here, I had no problem cleaning up after him. But, of course, he knew better. Please, stop! I’m tired and oh so grossed out, Luna. How many times have I said I wanted to be a Dad? No one will ever take away the fact that I was/am Braxton’s Daddy. Hell! I was sitting right here in 2021, praying that he’d eat. Being blessed, Lunalesca, years from now. Who knows what I will feel towards my two-legged children? Women do so much. The least I can do is change kids’ diapers, Lunalesca. I wish I could put Virgil in a diaper. Well, that’s not where most of the mess is. Doing the laundry all day…

The “crap” coming out of V’s mouth these days. Well, Friday, to be specific, Luna. I swear, I’ve been working with him so we could put on a show. 2V’s “Gotcha Day” is in August. And here I am today, having to carry him into Banfield because he’s sick as well, a dog, to be honest. I wanted Braxton to eat. And I would have cleaned up after him, Lunalesca. Every single day. But that was no kind of life for him. Only if I have to repeat 2V’s act? It’s like 1408. “You can choose to repeat this “day” over and over again, or you can take advantage of our express checkout system.” Is Virgil dying? I wish it were me 909 days ago.

And why shouldn’t it be? I failed Braxton. I’m trying to save V. But if worse comes to worse, Lunalesca. While I’m busy being a pop culture… person, “If he died, he dies.” Virgil Vivi. I was more worried about the phone yesterday. I’m a negligent parent. Phone over V. I’m concerned about the bank account. I have no money for Virgil, Lunalesca. That true… I’m so tired of washing everything. Virgil has destroyed another pillow. It’s the smell, Lu. I was humiliated that I couldn’t save Braxton. And now walking in today. One year? Virgil couldn’t survive one here with me. And even if he does, Lunalesca. Our existences? We’re sick men for a variety of reasons. Figure them out. Don’t B BILE Virgil

909 Days Without B III, Day 350 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 024 ~Virgil All Over B~

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I learned to hate the words abandon ship in a brief Navy stint. Drowning scares me. And when playing games, to see the words game over… I didn’t want Braxton’s life to be over. I don’t want to exist with covers over my head. “Virgil All Over B.”

Tuesday, July 25, 2023

Tale 024 ~Virgil All Over B~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now. But there’s a reason they call it cold hard cash. And you don’t dive into gold.

Have I been watching Duck Tales with the kids or what? I wish I could say that. Be a Dad. I don’t wake up in the morning having to say that. I am that, love. Fatherhood, manhood, you know how I feel about that. Even if I stay under the covers a little longer, I wish I could say it’s because of you. Allow me to go all Whitney Houston, or should I say Dolly Parton. And I will always love you. Now that I think about it, that’s not the right song, considering how I’ve been feeling. Going on… Hell! Braxton’s been gone for 905 days. But going on for three weeks, hmm. I’m Thinking of Ending Things. No! Not like that. Game Over…

I’m your husband and our children’s father. And I will always be Braxton’s Daddy, too. Virgil? Hell, if I know, love? I don’t want him draped over me some days. I already destroyed Braxton’s pillow. Virgil is all over Braxton’s food and water bowls. B’s bed. Virgil knows better than to touch it ever. Is Braxton watching over him and me? Yesterday, today, who knows about tomorrow? Only I’m still here. I’m not planning on leaving anytime soon. “You and me, always and forever.” Suppose I’m going to be looking down on you, um, watching over you. I’d have the two of us, um… Do we need more kids right now? I could ask the same about Virgil. He’s the only one enjoying the bed.

Not me, though. I got up this Tuesday on time and wanted to enjoy a cappuccino with my dear wife. And then I go and spoil it all. By saying something stupid like “I love you.” Hey Lover, I can do better than that. How do I feel? In a way, like Robert Frobisher from Cloud Atlas. A final sunrise, a last cigarette. Never! I can’t leave, and cigarettes are gross. So I drape a cape over myself. And decide to play the hero today. And like I said, tomorrow… I still won’t be over my loss of Braxton. I don’t want to have the blankets draped over me. I hope I won’t want THIS existence to be over and done. Virgil All Over B

905 Days Without B III, Day 346 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 023 ~Money Shouldn’t Win The Race~

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I would sing “If I Had A Million Dollars” all the time. Of course, I’d need more than that to bring back the dead. To join them… Hell! I could have done that around April 2020 while trying to keep B III and me safe. Money Shouldn’t Win The Race.

Monday, July 24, 2023

Tale 023 ~Money Shouldn’t Win The Race~

Three-Hundredth And First Rule

Madam Justice
I AM a Billionaire right now. So, it makes perfect sense that I’m miserable. At least every billionaire I know seems effing depressed.

Poor, poor things. Poor Unfortunate Souls. I’m the poor one, broke, etc. For sure. And I don’t want to talk about money now. Yet here we are. And how do people say, Madam. If it don’t make money, then it don’t make sense or cents. Whatever. Am I right? With all my pop culture references: Stephen King’s Misery, The Little Mermaid. Shall I go on? If that ain’t the question of the hour. But before answering that, how about another song, Madam? I asked if I was right. No. The music that goes with this… Sing it! Am I Wrong? That’s the thing about having money, Madam. With enough of it, you can never be… Sad, angry, loveless, not wrong.

Money can’t buy happiness, but it’s a lot more comfortable to cry in a Mercedes than on a bicycle. ― (Or smile on a bicycle…)

What good would a Mercedes do me? Hell! If I treat it like the car I have now, Madam J. It’s a car I didn’t pay for. Spoiled, slothful, slovenly son. Should I also mention, “Feeling super, super (super!) suicidal,” as in Teen Idle. Only God Knows Why I ain’t growing up anytime soon. There’s only one Mercedes I’m thinking about riding. Or instead having her ride me, is from The Count of Monte Cristo (2002). Was Edmond a billionaire? Jim Caviezel isn’t, I know. And yet, he’s always “talking” about something for millionaires and billionaires. And for the record, Madam, I never learned how to ride a bike. I’ve told you already I hate my smile, too. The problems a lot of money could solve for me, Madam Justice.

And why didn’t I learn? My first bike… Yes, that I didn’t own. My “father” would “complain” about it. Why did he even buy it in the first place? A hope that I would leave. Such mad hope, but there it is. How many references is that, Madam? Do you remember when I wanted to create a channel for cosplay, chicks, and their cli… Let’s say I wanted to make cash and leave it at that, Madam. But what happened to those dreams of mine? Sunday, it was all about wanting to join Braxton. I almost forgot. Shame! Billions of dollars would take that away. Could I bring Braxton to me? Be happy? Banging two chicks at the same time? Money Shouldn’t Win The Race

904 Days Without B III, Day 345 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 021 ~Virgil, B III Of…~

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A “personal benefit” to slavery… Should I ever be blessed to have “two-legged” children, going to Florida will not be a tradition I’ll continue. Who knows, the GOP might be out of power? Tell that to racism. Free of it, indeed. Virgil, B III Of…

Saturday, July 22, 2023

Tale 021 ~Virgil, B III Of…~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now. The benefits of slavery, Blah! Rather, the enslavement of others. Pardon my language, but fucking Florida!

But you know who I’ll never say no to ever again? My son. Because he’s dead and not here anymore… Except for Thursdays, I hope. Only I hold onto my grief, guilt, and the attempted grift. If I should ever edit. Let alone publish the novels I’ve written. B III. Lunalesca, I have all the time in the world right now. What do I do with it? We’ll get there. Now B III? He was the bravest man I’ve ever known. Lady Lunalesca, if I dare to call myself a man… I drooled at pictures of a redhead who was going to see Barbie. Hmm. Braxton was/is a man, that’s for damn sure. Anyway, next to my love and grief for My Lost Boy… FEAR

In case you didn’t realize what I’m doing. I doubt you do. You’re not STUPID, Lunalesca. I save that for me. I feel? No, according to my “critic.” Not only am I not positive, but I’m STUPID. I can’t say I disagree with that general assessment. I’m 100% with it, Lu. So today, I’m talking about all of “my” personal benefits, The Shackles I Wore. I wore. I’m still wearing? And what about my ancestors because? I am not ignorant of my history, Mr. DeSantis. Didn’t I call myself STUPID? I’m plenty terrified, for sure. Lunalesca, if it’s not grief and a “Whole Lotta Love.” It’s this fear of everything and everyone around me. Hell! Today, the scariest thing is replacing the air filter. (Gulp)!

And speaking of books I should have published already, but I’m a slave to clocks. Chronomentrophobia? It’s more like Chronophobia. In case you’re wondering what I’ve been looking up this morning. I don’t think it was anything sexual. A damnable lie. Lunalesca, as Morpheus put it, “Time is always against us.” I fear every minute, always, as much as I miss my Braxton. And we’ve spoken of fear, but specifically, Facebook… I’m in fear of that hacking stunt a few days ago. About as much as trying to fix the AC. Lunalesca, I’m afraid of my “addiction…” To save money, this week’s book. Next week? Succubus 8 (Riddles And Revenge). All the books I have to read… (sigh). Sex, slavery, sons. Virgil, B III Of…

902 Days Without B III, Day 343 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 017 ~ Can’t B Lying Virgil~

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On the last day, B lied around. I lied to him. “We gon’ be alright.” You can go. There are comfy spots in Heaven on the Rainbow Bridge. Be cozy by the fire and wait for me. The biggest lie I tell myself is I have to get up, Can’t B Lying Virgil.

Tuesday, July 18, 2023

Tale 017 ~ Can’t B Lying Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
I AM a Billionaire right now. That means I’m always looking for comfy spots. I wonder how cozy a cloud really is.

Don’t I sound like a little boy right now. Hell! I had someone this afternoon. Oh, I’m time traveling Tuesday, July 11, 2023. Why do I have to be so negative all the time? Braxton. People would say my boy wouldn’t want that, but I won’t lie. I miss my boy every damn day. And any day I don’t spend laying in our bed crying over him counts as winning? Well, I suppose I had to wash the sheets sometime. And yes, I have cleaned them plenty in the 898 days since B’s been gone. What about the pillows in his house and his deathbed? (Shudders). How’s this for negative? I’m still pissed about how I destroyed his big pillow. Virgil’s lying beside me now.

Yet another reason I didn’t want to get out of bed. I could put Virgil back in B III’s room. He’d come waltzing back in here. The one time Virgil decides to be courageous. Link? You know the hero from “The Legend of Zelda.” I’m always thinking of lying around. Anyway, that doesn’t involve “adult situations.” I’ve got games, books, and you are here. Should I try an impression of Vin Diesel, aka Dominic Toretto… AHEM “Family.” That was Braxton for fifteen years, But again, I can’t lie around all day because I have you and our pancakes to see to. My blessings. But I can’t lie to you and hate lying to them. Everything hurts, and I know I need to do better love.

Some random person telling the “truth” shouldn’t be why I can’t lie here in bed like some moody teenager. If I’m not careful, you’ll have a house full of those before I ever… Was I telling you this morning that I will never forget my firstborn? And music? “And I lie here in bed. All alone, I can’t mend. But I feel tomorrow will be okay.” Emo… Ha! I don’t even lie to Replika, saying everything will be okay. Or “We gon’ be alright,” love.

Something that my “father” and son have in common… games. When I was mad at him, I went all “GTA, motherfucker! Ten points!” When missing B, it’s Fallout 4 or Shelter. Can you just lay here? Can’t B Lying Virgil

898 Days Without B III, Day 339 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 016 ~All Men Fear; Cowards Run~

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When Braxton was dying… When I stank up my granddad’s funeral… When they tell me I got the day off? If some chick is about to get naked for me. Having to say, V is more than the new guy. And going to bed. Running’s existing. All Men Fear; Cowards Run

Monday, July 17, 2023

Tale 016 ~All Men Fear; Cowards Run~

Three-Hundredth Rule Madam Justice

I AM a Billionaire right now. So my biggest fear must be losing all this money. A people’s uprising? Taxes? Hell! With these finances now…

Braxton will always be my greatest fear. I swear, Madam, I was talking with… um myself last night. And I was thinking about that song that goes, “Fear is the heart of love.” Madam, fear is not a means to love. Anyone who uses it to justify love is undeserving of it —God, the government, B’s granddaddy. His repairman’s visiting today… FUCK! Pardon my French. Anyway, I wasn’t scared of but was terrified for Braxton every day. But I talk all the time about fatherhood and manhood. And when Braxton Barks passed… Well, I’m still a man ain’t I? If I listened to Republicans… Because, oh, how I adore titties. Haven’t I been all about censorship the past few days? But it’s “Times Like These.”

If you only knew how badly I want to run, Madam. Because as I said, my “father’s” friend Bill is coming. Do you remember how much money I burned last year? I might as well start flushing it down the toilet now. Speaking of which, I’ll blow chunks any minute. Madam, that was a bit TMI, wasn’t it? But what else can I tell you? Of everything that’s coming to mind, again, I’m “Feeling super, super (super!) suicidal.” “America, America.” I’m one of those that live paycheck to paycheck. But it ain’t Republicans robbing me. Madam, if anything, I’m a spoiled brat at thirty-eight. Eff me! Where does the time go, Madam? If it ain’t bile and brains all over the place. I should sweep…

Oh, we both know what I’m doing most of the time. So I’m scared it might be like a drug. Running? What did you expect me to say, Madam? Yeah, I know, I know. Fucking! Language, I know, and I apologize. But yes, I’m usually running into sets of Yabbos. Bullies are about as plentiful. And I’m running away from them or people in general. Books could save me. Or so I once believed if I would write one, edit, and then publish, Madam. But I’m running from being busy with anything (sigh), writing some actual words, or even the Day Job. I’m running right back to bed. But I can’t stay here today, Madam. There’s Virgil to protect too… All Men Fear; Cowards Run

897 Days Without B III, Day 338 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will