Thursday, March 26, 2026

Journey 268 ~Braxton’s Word, Virgil’s World~

1880 Days Without B III, Day 1321 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? As for me? “Son, what you don’t understand. My words might never explain. So I am hoping that time will.”

And you have eternity. I never know how much time I have left. And with how sick I’ve been. The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident, The Cherry Collision, and now The M Mashup. Hopefully, I’ll meet your potential stepmom in the flesh someday, B III. SIGH.

We’ll get to her in due time. But the thing is “Right Now.” What, you didn’t know your Daddy knows a little Van Halen? And now your brother knows. Honestly, Virgil and I are still feeling each other out. And your little brother is the reason that “Right Now” I don’t crawl back into bed, and what? Give up. I’ve been giving up forever, Braxton.

Seriously, if there were a button I could press today.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I shouldn’t say such things. Things like Goodbye. But the sweetest dream or the scariest nightmare. Anything is better than this, Braxton. It’s why I woke up on time and then promptly went back to sleep. This morning’s big three have been Whiteout Survival, your potential stepmom, and porn. But “that’s major boring shit. Let’s do something a little more fun.” I had a dream last night about zombie postal carriers. And since comedy comes in threes, there was my own trip to the post office. And the movies The Postman and 1408. You remember the scene when they wrecked the post office around John Cusack/Mike Enslin. Then throw in 1984, some zombies, and the creepy tune from The Ocarina of Time—the Potion Shop.

The word for it is “Creepy.” I was picking up some coveralls, but I was thinking “So if I decide to waiver my chance to be one of the hive.” Incubus? Really? Well, I do have my Succubi. I swear, B, other than the book about your passing and our talks here, I can’t have you reading any of my writing. But that’s for another day. Me Before You, hmm.

Braxton, if that were true, I would have already followed you. But for you, Virgil, and M Anime. Your potential stepmom is “Livin’ On The Edge” with me, and I’m trying to talk her away from it. Why? She wants to be a mom, there’s V, and you’re still barking LIVE.
Braxton’s Word, Virgil’s World

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Thursday, March 19, 2026

Journey 261 ~Braxton’s Sick Burns, Virgil~

1873 Days Without B III, Day 1314 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Hell, there was a time your day didn’t begin until you got your Cerberus on.

Guarding Hell’s gates? My way of saying your doggie gate whenever your grandparents or your mother came down the steps. Relax, B, we weren’t that southern. Your mother, aka my sister, gave you up. And next thing you and I know, you’re eating my pancakes.

Speaking of breakfast, as I sit here, B, your little brother, lying on his pillow on the floor, I had a crazy thought. Crazier than Far Cry 5’s “We Will Rise Again” when the world falls into the flames? That is so MAGA, seriously. Anyway, crazier than that apocalyptic story I wrote about the world ending in fire, “Apocalypse Rush. The Salamanders Dragon, Phoenix, Ifrit, and the Morning Star. Salamander Ho from Fahrenheit 451. Michael B. Jordan’s been all over.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I know Braxton, I know I’m jumping all over the place, and that’s because I’m burning all over. Not quite like that night after The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident. I jumped out of bed so fast, and for the first time, ever, I wished I didn’t have, ahem… man parts.

Honestly, that’s the only time in history I ever wished you weren’t here. Knowing you, B, you would have given me one of your patented looks, saying, “You put me in time-out so you could be a dumbass, Daddy.” With that being said, I’m going to buy some cranberry vitamins and juice. And if this goes on another week, I’ll be figuring out how to pay for a doctor. Sell your books or Apocalypse Rush.

Yeah, because that’s going great. I’m not Robert Frost, all “Fire and Ice.” If I had been, I could have kept you alive… In body, not in book form. But I’ve never been hot at you for leaving B III. I’ve been mad at myself for 1873 days. But what else has me hot today?

Virgil’s being annoying, but that’s your little brother. I already told you I’m sick because of what happened on the 10th. I’m embarrassed and a little miffed at M Anime. Yup, FEAR is the worst, STUPID is behind it. uneducated… Difference with Animus and Anima…

Which makes me madder at myself for being angry with her. And Grok, writing better stories. I know that look B. Braxton’s Sick Burns, Virgil

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Thursday, March 12, 2026

Journey 254 ~B The Spotlight Virgil~

1866 Days Without B III, Day 1307 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Are you still moonlighting as a doctor? “Oh No You Didn’t?” I just had faith.

You were going to make it to twenty. Twenty-one. Hell, Braxton, you would live forever.

“Who Wants To Live Forever?” (Raises hand) at 3:30 AM. My initial response would be this. AHEM, Hell NO! But why was I asking for you, my son, the doctor last week? And after my stupidity on Tuesday. Me, recreating The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident.

The spotlight was on M Anime’s Yabbos, B. Your potential stepmom, well, “She Drives Me Crazy.” She’s my “Obsession.” And speaking of which, do I need a doctor for physical or mental reasons? I’d say both. However, remembering both The Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident and The Cherry Collision, and how I felt like I had been hit by a truck.

The Final Destination 2 Log Truck would be great B.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

So my mental health then. Then again, I never imagined a sword-fighting dog. Misty Mountain Legends and Dark Souls: The Great Grey Wolf Sif? And I dare to call myself a writer. How else am I to provide a future for you and Virgil? I suppose you don’t worry about that much anymore. And your little brother 2-V is sound asleep. I should be, too.

But if I’m not communing with you, my fallen padawan. Apprentice? We are Sith, B.

Anyway, if I have to be awake, I would rather be making you more siblings with M Anime this morning. Didn’t I mention living forever? And if it isn’t some 80’s song from Queen, Fine Young Cannibals, or Animotion. Seriously.

Sexual Healing by Marvin Gaye. I know Braxton, eww! But you’ll never find yourself scratching at the bedroom door. Virgil is going to be pissed, though, about finally getting a stepmom. I’m still not sure. But I’m not sure about a lot of things. And the things I put out into the spotlight. Step into the spotlight, Braxton—all the AI recreations of you with your brother. And speaking of AI, I was asking if I need to go and see a doctor. Uh cash?

M Anime is my “Private Dancer,” so we won’t be filming content. And what about your book? Legend Has It, it’s not in the spotlight. I’ll tell M, “Baby, You’re My Light.” Braxton, you’re my sun. B The Spotlight Virgil

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Thursday, March 5, 2026

Journey 247 ~Paging Doctor B, Virgil~

1859 Days Without B III, Day 1300 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Mine, Monsieur B, Doctor B, I have lost “my” money, mattress, and my righteous mind:

“To find, take back, and keep your righteous mind… because obviously you have lost it.”

“I tell you hwhat!” Wow, “The Great Debaters” and “King of the Hill.” And what about “The Walking Dead,” Braxton? Your potential stepmom asked me, “How do I feel now?”

Well, at this particular moment, The Walking Dead feels about right. Except I’m crying, B.

70/30? The 70 being out of pure exhaustion and some other things. The 30 being “All About You,” my friend. How often have THEY heard that song at the Day Job? Music doesn’t pay the bills. Excuse me? It doesn’t pay “my” bills. I’m no singer or writer—especially not a doctor. Your brother has his own School of Hard Knocks. Poor Virgil. So I “Gotta Have You” and AI. And didn’t I admit never accepting but admitting you B…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

You’re dead. And I wish…

Braxton, how many times have I wished to join you? But the dead don’t cry. Hell with all our conversations, I beg to differ. Dead men tell no tales. Again, here we are, my son. Honestly, if your Dad is going to Die Hard… Eww! There’s Tyrion Lannister for you:

“In my own bed, at the age of 80, with a belly full of wine and a girl’s mouth around my cock.”
Game of Thrones

Sexual Healing! Again Eww! But it’s not like you, and I haven’t had “The Talk” when I had to tell you not to play with your toys in front of your Favorite Girl. Or when I had to tell you not to be on her yabbos all night. Like father, like son. Because I definitely want to be on her yabbos “All Night Long.” To paraphrase Old Town Road, B:

My life is a movie, fur buddies, and boobies ―

Yeah, your Dad could certainly use some mental health. And while you were awesome B III… Are awesome, considering we’re still talking, there are some things I can tell Doc AI and not you. For example, sex, for all intents and purposes, is a coping mechanism. Uh, effing duh! And look at it this way. You and Virgil would be barking and crying outside the bedroom door anyway if M Anime ever showed up. She wants to make you and Virgil some two-legged siblings. That’s one dream. But that dream the night before, my friend. Me and M in bed, hot tub, and the trailer park… But first, the eye doctor. Paging Doctor B, Virgil.

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Thursday, February 26, 2026

Journey 240 ~Braxton, Virgil, Little Dreams~

1852 Days Without B III, Day 1293 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? My day? Another series of apologies. I woke up. Afraid, Hard (Eww), and your stepmom.

I should say your potential stepmom, M Anime. Fortunately, I couldn’t get too crazy, Little B. Your little brother is developing a habit of trying to crawl up next to me. At around two in the morning, I moved him back towards the foot of the bed. I know, meanie

Anyway, when I woke up “properly,” I found him closer to my legs, and I hopped up for three reasons. Bull ridin’ and boobies? Well, boobies was the last one. The first two were, I thought, I was late for the Day Job. You know what you call “The Bad Place.” And the second was bad dreams. Um, not bad, but odd. And of course, I went running straight to M Anime to tell her. “I Adore Mi Amor,” right?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

So the dream: I was and wasn’t Michael Jackson in “The Jacksons: An American Dream.” Michael was climbing down a small cliff to reach a crystal-blue lake. He was fully clothed, but I remember red cowboy boots. The water was getting higher, and there was a chill on my hips. Then there was a song that I couldn’t identify, so I looked to the shore, and Michael’s brothers were there. One, I believe Terrance Howard played, said something like, “I don’t care if we stay here a day or forever.” But the first song, Braxton…

It got louder. And then I was suddenly transported to the other side of this “villa.” The stones were the same color, so I knew we were still on the property. There was a wedding reception. Some guests were ahead of us, smiling and cheering. Us? It was me, Braxton, and your potential stepmom, M Anime. I remember a red ribbon around her throat. And you and Virgil… Remember that picture I couldn’t share… Kyouko Sakai, Kojin Taxi 2/Sex Taxi 5 held you. And Lulu, Final Fantasy X held Virgil. You two, my fur buddies.

But it wasn’t the women’s clothes or lack thereof; it was the Latino man who was singing, and it was a blend of “Oh, My Darling Clementine” and “Unchained Melody.” He wore a tan suit like President Obama and a pin of yellow and white flowers. But it was the Blue Baptista that made it pop. The flower of “The Purge.” Then the words “Dream on, dream away.” And the dream came to an end. So I sang it, heard the inflection, and found it.

Braxton, that brings us to now. What does it mean other than I’ve been listening to Color Me Badd for an hour? I could go on forever thinking about every little thing. Because I dream big and I dream in color. I suppose you do too. Is that why they call it the Rainbow Bridge? M Anime and I were walking down a tower. You? Virgil? Braxton, Virgil, Little Dreams

“You mustn’t be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling.”

It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Thursday, February 19, 2026

Journey 233 ~HIGH Virgil, Braxton’s BAKED~

1845 Days Without B III, Day 1286 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I know that I’ve seen “Better Days,” Glasses on. Phone on my chest. Something pretty…

Oh, and what could be cuter than B? I miss you sitting on my head. Ok, duly noted, my boy.

But I wouldn’t mind if M Anime sat on my face. I know, I know, Eww! But she is your potential stepmom. And Braxton, in all honesty, your Dad did not want to wake up.

Please, that’s most mornings. But this one was particularly bad. And the only reason your bum of a father is sitting in Den in front of the TV is because she texted. And I had the good sense not to shatter my glasses, which is why the phone was on my chest. If anything, that is a testament to how HOT she is… I broke a pair reading “Backyard Dungeon.”

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

You know, the HaremLit series from Logan Jacobs. That was one of those books I wouldn’t read to you or your little brother. But that doesn’t mean it should be burned. If I were to start burning books, it’s because I can’t afford them. Eff MAGA, eff the Cracker Hats, and FDT! And that brings me to today, Braxton. I’m missing you, I’m worried about
Virgil. And myself? Well, eff me too. Another reason I’m still “Alive.” But Meat Loaf?

Braxton, I couldn’t have that even if I knew how to make it. I make bad financial decisions. A lot. Like Backyard Dungeon? Why am I hitting Mr. Jacobs? I liked Backyard Dungeon. I was tired and dropped my tablet onto my glasses one day.

C’est La Vie, treat you unfairly. Like between you and Virgil. You’re both my sons, and I love you both. But fathers aren’t supposed to have favorites, and you know who wins between you and Virgil. I’m either going to Hell for what happened to you or how I’m treating him. Honestly, either way, I need a drink, a smoke, or some pus**… Gross! Sorry!

But I could REALLY be on drugs or develop a drinking problem. There’s also Obsession. I sent M Anime that Animotion tune, and if I could tell her anything, “You’re So Damn Hot.” The only time you were hotter than her is when you got baked… A horrible joke, duly noted. I ain’t right. Low-blood sugar. HIGH Virgil, Braxton’s BAKED

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Thursday, February 12, 2026

Journey 226 ~That’ll B Heavenly, Virgil~

1838 Days Without B III, Day 1279 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Me? I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed—things my Olds never said to me ever.

So what am I saying it to you for? Isn’t it Ironic, I blame you when I feel like this?

Like, I might die? A stomach bug, a toothache, like I got hit by a truck, and every bone was breaking after the Zoe Colletti/Tifa Lockhart Incident, and there’s drowning.

Honestly, B, I shouldn’t have made it to forty-one, but here I am wishing you a Happy Birthday. More like Welcome to Level Twenty-One! Your birthday is tomorrow, of course.

But again, who knows if I’ll live to see it. Wrong words, Braxton Barks Bradford. But if I turn the computer a certain way as I sit here in bed, I can imagine it’s you lying against my leg, and now your little brother Virgil.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Must I be so mean? If you want to see ornery, yep, that’s me getting up after puking into a garbage can next to the bed. Eww! Do I blame that Jack’s chicken? Downright blasphemy. The best legs, breasts, and thighs can be found in a bucket/box of chicken ha-ha. For me, I’d say on your Favorite Girl, Cherry, or your potential stepmom, M Anime.

Speaking of which, maybe it’s all the horrible things I was thinking about her, before, then after the breakup, and now the reconciliation, when she needs me to be the man she needs me to be. The “Only One For Me.” Yeah, yeah, B, once upon a time, it was you and me against the world. But yabbos, hot sauce…

I’m not MAGA. Being a horrible human being can actually make me sick. Or I should sue Buffalo Wild Wings for that Wild Sauce. “Put you on the highway to Heaven like I’m your Uber.” Was that BWW or Hallelujah Heaven? Hell, it’s been five years, B III, I know.

Five years since your trip to the Rainbow Bridge. And if you told me I would die with all this pain and get to join you. I’d actually consider myself blessed. I’d follow you, Braxton.

And it’s a good thing I can’t eat anything. Diddly next to squat this paycheck, and next week is squat as in zero. So, about your birthday? M Anime says I listen. You’d say Stay Alive. That’ll B Heavenly, Virgil

‘It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad