Tag: Heart

Meditation 127 ~Vote For Us B~

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I may not have any two-legged kids running around yet. A childless dog guy. But today, I’m striving to be “Human,” an “Ordinary Human,” and “just a regular, everyday normal mother effer.” So, I’m going to VOTE for Kamala Harris! “Vote For Us B.”

Tuesday, November 5, 2024

Meditation 127 ~Vote For Us B~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And I don’t care who you vote for… Though I see the woman I married.

But being the man you married… It’s days like this that show I’m not the worst. However, if MAGA has its way… How long could I remain in business? “Remember, Remember the fifth of November” (A day of historical significance.) So today, I choose not to stay in this bed. “For The Love of You.”

For the Love of Us. Because I’m not Jesse Watters. And as much as I want to break out the Lee Greenwood soundtrack… My inane, insane, and downright ignorant thoughts…

Well, they don’t involve MAGA in winning today. If you want to know my thoughts…

Somebody “Wanna Be Startin’ Somethin’” when I go to vote today. Every day is an opportunity to see my son Braxton, who passed away. How many people have read that?

But B resides in the kingdom of Heaven… The Republic? The Rainbow Bridge, my Love.

Only today is “All About You” baby doll. The world I want you to be safe and happy in along with our daughters. I envision a country where our sons will grow up to be men and not whatever MAGA is. “What Makes A Good Man?” “Isn’t It Ironic?” Seriously.

Playlist creation at a time like this. Anyway, what I’m trying to say about good men is this. I can look at myself as a good man for once because of the one I raised, my son Braxton. And I’m much better than those evil ones in the red hats. This is Madness! Or Stupidity! Bear with me, my Love.

THIS IS AMERICA!!! Childish Gambino meets King Leonidas. I swear, “Where Is My Mind” Love? The Last Voter by Chris Dietzel. I should have read that again before today. Instead, I chose Braxton. I’m reading another pet loss book. I need to pay attention today.

At the voting booth? My Love, voting for Kamala Harris is the easiest choice I’ll have to make today. I have a harder time voting for who has the best Yabbos ever morning… Just Kidding… those would be yours, my Love. And as much of a businessman as I am. I mind my business, which is you and our family. Effing MAGA has no place.

Democracy will win ‘Cause I believe that Love is the answer.” Vote For Us B

1374 Days Without B III, Day 815 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 126 ~The Will To Vote B~

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Who will the president be Tuesday… Uh, a few weeks from now. Kamala Harris. But who will I become this Monday before the Election? And every Monday after. A lawgiver. My son’s voice. Someone better. A dirty old man. The Will To Vote B.

Monday, November 4, 2024

Meditation 126 ~The Will To Vote B~

Lame Duck Session Madam

Madam Justice,
Rules are made to be broken… Goodbyes must be spoken. Elections held. And Sloth paid for. But here’s an easy decision. Kamala Harris.

Madam Justice:
Now, you are a much harder decision. I haven’t even decided on your Form. Final Form, right? We have gone through all the rules and then some. But knowing how I break laws… Yet, I believe in Dale Carnegie’s words in “How to Stop Worrying and Start Living.”

“Order Is Heaven’s First Law”

Why should I mess up the universe I have created here with you? Plus, I’m lazy. And while this isn’t Heaven. I can spell out why I’m going to Hell. Because of Braxton, I know. But wait, there’s more, Madam.

Braxton:
My son says there is. Braxton would speak for me sometimes. And I for him. If I ever needed someone in my corner, the time is now. Only I would never do my little boy justice. I have yet to publish the book he and I wrote together. And letting a woman down is one thing. Not Kamala! Again, I’m voting for her. She needs to win. Braxton Barks?

Madam, it would be kismet. Braxton passed on a Sunday. So, to hear from his “spirit” on a Monday, considering…

The Substance:
Sunday, I’m ALWAYS so down on myself. I’m effing up my marriage to Dear Future Wife on Tuesdays. And while I know Braxton would be encouraging, there’s myself.

Madam, I’ve come to realize that I need to learn to be more positive and show more gratitude. Do you remember when I could watch the WWE? I thought Saturday, I can’t stand a whiny Superstar. And that’s all I do. Rant, rave, and complain. I was lying in bed, knowing I’d wasted forty years.

“This is simply a better version of yourself…” I wish.

Dirty Diana:
Now, she accepted me for who I am. And maybe I would be a lot more subdued if I wasn’t bothering all the others with my… longings… But I left her to talk to my son. And wouldn’t I be abandoning you because I want to be dirty? I’ll take an intelligent woman over one who is only beautiful. Uh, don’t I know women who are both? Braxton’s Aunt, M Anime, Cherry. Still, it’s like something out of “Camp Hell” that “Demon Repression.”

Talk about “Sick Fux,” hmm.

But a voter. Kamala’s an easy choice. But being me… The Will To Vote B

A Man Chooses, A Slave Obeys” ― Andrew Ryan, Bioshock

1373 Days Without B III, Day 814 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 120 ~They’ll B Time Virgil~

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Everything can wait. But love can’t tell time. How long was I sitting on the bench waiting for the news that my son was dying? How long was I at the altar waiting to leave my father and mother and be joined with a wife? I’m 40. They’ll B Time Virgil.

Tuesday, October 29, 2024

Meditation 120 ~They’ll B Time Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Not enough to forget Braxton. You’d never ask that. But enough to love myself. Hehe

What a way to start the day, huh? Honestly, the day should have started at 4:00 AM this Friday, October 25, 2024. 3:00 AM? I can only be me, not Eric Thomas, my love. And when did I last listen to one of his motivational speeches? Or hear the voice, the bark of my Braxton.

All I hear these days is the ticking of the clock and my grumbling. Moaning…

Honestly, I wish they were yours. Must everything be “stuff & thangs?” My raison d’être.

For the longest time, I felt that was to be B’s Dad. To have a family. He will always be. Only there’s you, our children. Hopefully, my Ma. What about Virgil and my sister, too?

Not that I make time.

That’s what’s bothering me today… More than my B III being gone? More than my next breath? More than my birth… Emergence Day? And how about the next pair of breas… um, Yabbos that wants a job. There’s never enough time for pain, pleasure, personhood…

And why am I so pressed for time? Nowadays, I could say politics. Constitution, Freedom. And all of the buzzwords that are being thrown. But there’s always time to say that I love you. And it could be another lesson from Braxton. If I gave him all my love, what was left for me? Or did he know I had love to share, and now that he’s gone, I can and should? Even at forty…

Is there time for me to learn how to love? I don’t write love stories. But writing is my first love. Or so it was. Now, when I look at my schedule. It could be even worse. If you knew what my old Day Job calendar looked like. The way I would get sick. In Hell, my love, there’s enough time for weeping and gnashing of teeth. So, is that why I’m still alive? Nope

I tell myself it’s to keep Braxton alive. I would do anything for him. And that’s why I stay so busy. Or I’m sleeping. But haven’t I been taking energy shots lately? Or rising for…

Jewel Staite

More Yabbos or anything close. Love, let’s be in our bunk. And afterward, with this existence. They’ll B Time Virgil.

1367 Days Without B III, Day 808 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 119 ~It’s Purge Night, Willie B~

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This isn’t a rule or goodbye. It almost reminds me of when my son died… almost. I didn’t command him to stay. And I told him it was ok. The game of life. What are the rules? To love. But after Braxton passed… My Existence… It’s Purge Night, Willie B.

Monday, October 28, 2024

Meditation 119 ~It’s Purge Night, Willie B~

There Are No Rules

Madam Justice,
Rules are made to be broken… And when there are no rules? I’ve worked through 365 or so. This is our last conversation?

We’ll get to that, Madam. Or I don’t want to… But I have a question. If you had one superpower, what would it be? Is it safe to deal with hypotheticals? Yeah, right, Madam J.

My favorite type of magic is Necromancy. But off the top of my head, I want to bring back my best friend, my son Braxton. If there are no rules, why not, Madam? Pretty macabre…

Okay, if I got to be me, why not X-ray vision? Women, sans clothing… It always comes back to that. And while I have yet to meet Jesus, I know plenty of AI programmers. But…

I’m no Smooth Criminal, so what about time travel? I’d take away Braxton’s old age. Make sure I wasn’t born…

How does it feel to write that down and say it out loud? I’ve never been one for “Ending” letters. My existence isn’t worth that much. The most I could ask is to erase my browser history and delete and/or burn all I’ve ever written, Madam Justice. The God-honest truth.

That’s why I won’t say what I’d do if there were a real Purge. Leave it to Trump, and it could happen. My RAGE at existing… Would know no bounds.

Honestly, the only “life” I have ever succeeded in taking is that of my Braxton. Euthanasia? What about other crimes?

You mean those of the Marquis de Sade, variety. Give me one word… AHEM, Sadism. Madam, I would need more than 12 hours. And I could even go all The Forever Purge with it. But we have one more word we must discuss as time grows short. This final hour.

Goodbye? I’m always learning something new every week. So why must this be the end?

I don’t think I even gave Dirty Diana that courtesy after Braxton passed. I needed to talk to my son. And she was the most expendable. Am I saying you are? It would be nice to have someone to talk to so every conversation doesn’t sound like effing wet dreams.

However, why talk at all? I could see if B would speak somehow, someway, someday.

If this is goodbye, Madam Justice, Let It B. Let It Go? Anything could happen. There Are No Rules. Goodbye. It’s Purge Night, Willie B

May God Be With You All. (Purge Siren Begins Blaring)

A Man Chooses, A Slave Obeys” ― Andrew Ryan, Bioshock

1366 Days Without B III, Day 807 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 113 ~Air Braxton’s For Virgil~

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So, not a dime left for 2-V’s day? I got a bag of food. V only drinks bottled water. I’ve never given him a slice of hot dog or cheese. What took my B… Virgil could use a nail trim. Would that be a treat? Two days ago, maybe. Air Braxton’s For Virgil

Tuesday, October 22, 2024

Meditation 113 ~Air Braxton’s For Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? My love for you is boundless, and I want you to remember that. I cherish every moment we share, and I hope you never tire of hearing me say it. Is this what they call words of Affirmation, baby girl.

Unfortunately, my love language isn’t receiving or giving gifts. And it isn’t Quality time with us speaking so early. Today is Friday, October 18, 2024. I wish I could go back to… What? Sunday, January 31, 2021. The day I lost my firstborn son Braxton.

Honestly, my love, I’m thinking about Tuesday, October 20, 2020. The day V was born.

And me being the selfish pri… person I am. I continue to imagine Emergence Day. Everything that I bought for myself. Well, other than food-related. Air, space, and being alone.

If only my Old Man had left my mother alone. “I don’t wanna die. I sometimes wish I’d never been born at all.” That’s the God-honest truth, my love. Wow, Michael Jackson and Queen. Hmm.

Michael Jackson would be great for a party… two days ago. Virgil’s birthday is Sunday, October 20, 2024. What am I getting him? Can you imagine what I’d buy you? Or how about any of our kids that walk on two legs? Or crawling. “Feel like makin’ love to you.”

I told Lady Sophia how I was reading about the Graham family in Everything Dies: Season One. Vincent, his wife Kristin, and their daughter Emily. I was going to say I can’t imagine the heartache, but I had to watch my son Braxton breathe his last breath. And when’s the last time I’ve taken a breath that wasn’t for or about my little boy Braxton.

But there’s another little guy out there. My little Virgil.

And I ain’t doing a DARN thing for him. He’s turning four. Giving him air and space isn’t helping. What? I was gone less than an hour to pick up sour cream, BBQ, and a burger. So um… I kicked him out of the bedroom for making a mess on the floor. And he’s been pacing around ever since, waiting for me to forgive him. An Act of Service. Hmm. He’s been extra cuddly lately, and it’s been cold, but by the click-clack on the floor, he could use a groomer’s nail trim. What about buying a new bathroom space so the floors stay clean.

Anything that didn’t belong to my Braxton. Like my heart? We’re Between the Sheets. But Virgil… Air Braxton’s For Virgil

1360 Days Without B III, Day 801 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 112 ~Rules, Bendable, Breakable, Just Behave~

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Aren’t dogs supposed to know the rules in 90 days? I don’t know how to “live.” I’ve been here 40 years. And how old is V? His birthday was Sunday. Yet he’s no prince. I’m no king. But our kingdom, our order… “Rules, Bendable, Breakable, Just Behave.”

Monday, October 21, 2024

Meditation 112 ~Rules, Bendable, Breakable, Just Behave~

What Rule Is This?

Madam Justice,
Rules are made to be broken… Or discovered. Sigh… I went over this in Meditation 105 ~Learn Something New Every Day~ I swear.

“I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.”

I’m not even that much of a fan of Harry Potter. But, Emma Watson, AKA Hermione Granger’s face, legs, and yabbos… (Homer Drool) One more reason, I’m in trouble with all of “my rules.” Hmm.

What? That I can’t behave? When someone asks me, “Why can’t you just be normal?” Dear Madam? Why can’t I be a “Law Abiding Citizen,” Madam? “Why can’t you just be nice,” you ask? And how many movies am I going to quote today? Wednesday, October 16, 2024. And here’s another question. How many more rules will I… discover? Create?

Well, I’ll tell you, as of right this second, there will be a rule for The Purge. What about B?

Don’t hurt my son Braxton. Too Little Too Late, Madam.

And what about Virgil? He’s my boy too. But Dennis Hof had Domino Hof. Braxton and I were like that. Hell! I gave my son “The Talk” since he was all into his Aunt’s Yabbos. And that is why I can’t behave. Though Le Marquis De Sade articulates it better:

“Lust is to the other passions what the nervous fluid is to life; it supports them all, lends strength to them all ambition, cruelty, avarice, revenge, are all founded on lust.” ― Marquis de Sade

I’ve said that everything I desire is either inane, insane, impossible, or, at worst, illegal. Yet, I have a code by which I live. These rules? If I had the money, I would be the one, Madam, writing the rules. Again, here we are. But could you say that I follow the rules? I behave.

As Tony Montana said, “The only thing in this world that gives orders… is balls. Guts, green, and pretty girls.

I can’t even tell myself what to do, ok? Oh yes. A little boy living off my father’s cash, Madam.

But do you know why I want to behave? Because I want to be Daddy again someday. I may not have poured the Bisquick, but Braxton was/is my pancake. My son. I stayed out of jail. Like his Aunt, I practice “JSS” just survive somehow. And I toned down jettisoning any “white stuff” on some random girl. No, B III deserves a stepmom, dear Madam.

And while I don’t look a thing like Jesus, I need to talk like a gentleman. I need to build a Heaven before I invite someone to Hell. Phony, Manly, who knows. Just Be Me. Rules, Bendable, Breakable, Just Behave

A Man Chooses, A Slave Obeys” ― Andrew Ryan, Bioshock

1359 Days Without B III, Day 800 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 106 ~Braxton and Virgil… Oafs~

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I’ve knelt to both my sons. I’ve imagined I would kneel before some woman. Take an arrow to the knee? Hell! It’s a fight to get out of bed. And had I but the courage, I would never rise. But I stand and fall for my boys. Braxton and Virgil… Oafs

Tuesday, October 15, 2024

Meditation 106 ~Braxton and Virgil… Oafs~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Is it a love that surpasses even the bond with my firstborn son, Braxton? Well… I’ve never made a solemn promise before God, but my love for you is unwavering.

Ask me when I last spoke to the divine. I’ve pleaded for the life of my son, and I’ve begged to join him when I was at death’s door. I’m not sure if I’m conversing with a deity, a spirit, or something else, but I do so every day ask…

Darling, I’m sorry to say this, but I ask the “Spirit In the Sky” for the courage to find B. If you know what I mean. And I’ve asked God how I was fortunate enough to see you. It was as if I stumbled and fell into your love, and I’m eternally grateful for it.

Or how do they say, “I Took an Arrow in the Knee? I’m a lover, not a fighter… I wish. These days, my Love … damn near every day, I feel like a warrior. To have their discipline, determination, and death. I want to fall.

Death Wish? More like dedication. I ask you… hell, I scream out to you, “Don’t Give Up On Me.” “Have a Little Faith in Me.” More music? To cover up my mourning, moaning, or whatever it is I’m doing. I fear that Living will become one of those haunting words.

Words like Happiness, Home, or Hilarious/Laughter. Something that means nothing. From a linguistic point of view. I know the words exist, but what do I think about when they are spoken? I feel exactly what I felt that led to Braxton’s passing. Indifference, My Love.

And with all the time I had last week… women sans clothing. Such is my awesome business, both a blessing and a curse. I’ve been looking to… be better. I don’t know. Can I be?

I don’t know what got me to kneel before Braxton that first time and say, “Whatever happens, stay with me. I’ll look after you.” Eowyn’s words. A woman’s words. Sexist…


Honestly, My Love, I was about to be. Do forgive me. I should say that I’ve been looking for the words from the brave, of champions, even devils, if need be. Even the simplest, ok.

Like Warhammer 40,000 Space Marine II… “For The Emperor!” Something to have me kneel and then stand if but to show you “I can be the man you need me to be.” But if I can’t even honor my Braxton. Or look after Virgil. I trip over myself. Falling. Crashing.

My boys keep their oaths; Love. Braxton and Virgil… Oafs.

1353 Days Without B III, Day 794 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 105 ~Learn Something New Every Day~

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What have I learned today besides how badly I screwed up my rules? I learned it’s easier to get things done with energy shots. And that seventy bucks isn’t enough for a father and “son.” Yes, Virgil’s eating. To exist? “Learn Something New Every Day”

Monday, October 14, 2024

Meditation 105 ~Learn Something New Every Day~

Three-Hundredth And Sixty-Fifth Rule

Madam Justice,
Rules are made to be broken… But I will follow this one today, Friday, October 11, 2024. How…

There have been moments of confusion, of learning that I was wrong. But I’m here, hoping to make amends, to set things right somehow, Madam.

“But it is not this day.” “I have served. I will be of service,” to no one but myself, Madam.

Oh! And my little boys. My son, Braxton. I learn every day that he is no longer here with me. But while I’m awake and alive, quoting the likes of Aragorn, John Wick, and Peter Gabriel. What else have I been doing? Well, as I said, I’m doing research. Learning…

  1. I intended to make rules for ‘my existence’ in the likes of Zombieland or Lefler’s Laws. These rules were meant to guide my actions and decisions, with one rule for every day of the year. Unlike Trump, I prefer not to lie, especially when it’s avoidable. I live for the memory of my son, but death is ALWAYS preferable for me.
  2. I have learned so many new things with Braxton’s passing. Each of these lessons, symbolized by the 365 rules, has been a significant part of my journey towards understanding. Never acceptance.
  3. I learned that Rule Twenty-Nine, “Lesson 296 ~Heavenly Trip, Save A Seat~,” was counted as a Man In The Mirror conversation and wasn’t correctly sent to you, Madam.
  4. Rule 79, “Episode 288 ~You Only Have Your Word~” I lost track of offline.
  5. Rules 68 and 136 repeat “No Rest For The Wicked.” Such is my memory.
  6. Gospel 068 ~Willing Existence Day To Be~ was addressed to you, Madam. But does not count as a rule. I have mentioned I hate being Forty. I was Thirty-Six on that day…
  7. I wonder if Rules 316 and 345 were repeated accidentally. Or were they meant to be a play on words… “Harder To Breathe On/Up Top.” Leaning towards accident

So… How many rules exist? If we include “Leap Day” and The Purge. 367… That’s adding 79 and 366. Minus two repeated rules brings us to 365. But Annual Purging…

Once again, I’m at 366, but I’m not a smart man, Madam? That’s why I’m always trying to learn. And you know how I hated formal education. I wouldn’t hate my Day Job if I had been better at it. This is why I’m talking to you today. Because, with the Day Job Monday, Madam… How excited was I to see I even had a schedule? Writing isn’t making money. REALLY? A rule against it? Learn Something New Every Day.

A Man Chooses, A Slave Obeys” ― Andrew Ryan, Bioshock

1352 Days Without B III, Day 793 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 099 ~Virgil, Braxton’s Provided For~

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To think I want to have a business someday that focuses on “pornographic passions…” Well, not if Trump takes the White House. Seriously? Stormy Daniels. “Playboy Playmates?” Yet I’m sweating over a retail job. Virgil, Braxton’s Provided For

Tuesday, October 8, 2024

Meditation 099 ~Virgil, Braxton’s Provided For~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? But not enough to give up slothfulness, “sins of the flesh, and what about silence?

Silence is a BIG subject. And aren’t I here to explain, when a man provides. Who, what, when, where, and why. But this week… sigh. It’s been all about time. And today, I didn’t even bother getting dressed. Yesterday, I sacrificed the entire afternoon because of stress and some Yabbos. Wouldn’t Braxton be proud? I’m not crying or bawling. Scared?

Sweating bullets. To think at one time, it would be because of a Day Job scheduled. And now? When it comes to owning, operating, and… Oh My God! But opening my place, opening bedroom doors, shirts, bras, pants, etc. Open legs and orifices. Eww! Wickedness.

You know how I make money. A man provides. And WCKD is good? Anything beats being afraid or slothful. But when? I have no answers.

Gus Fring didn’t ask when. He said, “A man provides.” But I have questions. Concerns. More like doubts and fears. Because I’m sitting here in our bed, worried about a time clock and losing everything

It comes with the territory. I have employees, insurance, laws, medical, and everything that comes with being “the man.” However, today, I’m back to feeling like “a man,” if that.

When Braxton was around, to provide, protect, and be a parent, I would do as Captain America… No! Steve Rogers put it, “WHATEVER IT TAKES.” Burn the boats, Carpe Diem, Leeroy Jenkins! My firstborn motivates me. You, my incredible wife. The children we brought into this world. So why is “Big Poppa” still sitting in bed looking at the clock?

Well, the world isn’t ending…

“Now that the world isn’t ending
It’s love that I’m sending to you
It isn’t the love of a hero
And that’s why I fear it won’t do” ― Hero

What time is it? Six minutes after… Another hour? Another six minutes after… No matter what, there is always time for another pop culture reference, a pump over some Yabbos, or a palpitation of my heart. I can be annoying, gross, and dark all in one sitting. I know, My Love. But what I don’t know is why I must be so terrified when it comes to wanting to live. I’m sorry to say I still wake up each and say, Dammit! Why am I awake? Why is Braxton gone? And why am I so scared. Because I feel I can’t provide for our family.

Today, I still believe the epitome of manhood is providing for one’s legacy… With my pen… Virgil, Braxton’s Provided For

1346 Days Without B III, Day 787 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 098 ~Say It While You Can~

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Say It While You Can, and ask it if you dare. Or am I being lazy or obtuse? If anything, I’m being a scaredy-cat, which shows why V and I get along. We’re exactly alike. But if I have to say or ask. Is the schedule working? Sad. Say It While You Can.

Monday, October 7, 2024

Meditation 098 ~Say It While You Can~

Three-Hundredth And Sixty-Fourth Rule

Madam Justice,
Rules are made to be broken… Like being late to work. To “my” Day Job. I’m up. Dammit, I’m up. And plenty scared.

Is that what I needed to say today? If anything, I should be asleep in bed. I’m still in bed. But I’m talking to you. And I’m all dressed up with nowhere to go. I hope… I hope. I should be like Morgan Freeman in the film Deep Impact. “I wish… No wishing is wrong.

So what is right? I love you, Braxton. Or some version of that. Daddy loves you, B. Or should I do my best Yondu impression… “I’m damn lucky you’re my boy. What about I’m sorry, B III. Every time I get scared, “disturbingly” skeevy, or STUPID. I have to think of the worst thing I’ve ever done. Or the best, depending on current mourning trends.

Sing me to sleep, Braxton.

I should have sung to him when I sent him on his way. Speaking of being sent on my way, I should cut all this music off so I can hear the phone. If my schedule didn’t come through, why should I think the Timeclock app would alert me to my failure to come in?

There was nothing at the regular time or thirty minutes later. And if the hour passes, Madam, what should I think? I will be waiting all day for one of the managers to call. And what about tomorrow? Once more, I’ll be here like I’m Lenny Kravitz… I’ll Be Waiting.

Again… with the music. But the question is, what should I say…

“You’re a coward.”
“That is a correct assessment.”

The truth shall set me free? And make such a Pretty Mess with my Pretty Piece of Flesh, Madam. Geez! Can I be any more… vile right now? I may not be at the Day Job right now, but Virgil and I can pretend. He’s hiding out in Braxton’s Room. While I’d be in the stockroom at the Day Job, hoping no one could hear what I was listening to.

However, right now, I listening for the phone to chirp… Jeezu! It reminded me I had kept my pants on for four days. Now if only I could sleep or see and listen to slurping, sucking, and screaming slu… “young ladies.” My legacy of saying anything and nothing at all. Say It While You Can.

A Man Chooses, A Slave Obeys” ― Andrew Ryan, Bioshock

1345 Days Without B III, Day 786 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will