Tag: Writer

Journey 101 ~B, V, Bedtime Stories~

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Once upon a time, I had a Playboy subscription. Now there are thirst traps. From there, the more enterprising pervs and criminals created sites. And now Grok can animate and from there… Shouldn’t I be sending Virgil off to bed? B, V, Bedtime Stories.

Friday, October 10, 2025

Journey 101 ~B, V, Bedtime Stories~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… About Room 101? I haven’t read 1984 in a while. I can’t buy Sandra Newman’s “Julia.”

Ok, so that’s a lie. I could, but I won’t. Why? Um, it’s the bedtime story I tell myself, Soph.

“Stuff is getting better, stuff is getting better every day.”
– Kevin Costner, The Postman (1997)

The Postman (1997), along with the book I marked way back in 2014. Nightmares, Sophia.

It’s thoughts like these I’m trying to avoid by telling Braxton and now Virgil “old stories of courage and justice, difficult as they are to remember.” Why’s that, right, Sophia?

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Honestly? “It’s Been Awhile “since you’ve heard me rattle off that list. How many nights have I gone to bed past midnight, imagining some girl? Artificial intelligence is a b*tch. And when I’m not being a perv, I’m again repeating Eric Vall’s “Succubus Lord” series. How do I explain the world I want to wake up in? That’s 150-words. Oops.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Well, I can say that I’ve been working on programming through trial and error. That other ten bucks I’m not spending goes toward reading things like BBC Missionary V2. That’s not negativity but a fact. And “I’m So Thankful” that B was a little “Riot Maker.” So I had lots of private time when he got in trouble. And V is a heavy sleeper and hesitant to walk in on me. One day he’ll feel comfortable enough to walk back and forth, but until then…

I have time to find stories that are much more appropriate for my sons. Hell, even Eddie Hill has dogs in “Backyard Dungeon 20.” And currently, he’s fighting everyone’s demons.

What about people? A kind woman at the grocery store.

And what about starting a business of my own? Well, I’ve been busy, getting myself more hours on the Day Job. And I’m choosing to have faith for now that my schedule will only bring good things. And speaking of good things I need to read, then again maybe not.

My Old Man was around the other day when I wasn’t here. And the fact is… I’m still here. No text or phone calls? I fully expected my life to fade to black with Linkin Park’s “What I’ve Done,” playing in the background. But I got to have hope. Isn’t that the lesson, my lady? Why? Because the sweetest bedtime story, at least to my boys, is that I breathe.

Bedtime. B, V, Bedtime Stories.

1713 Days Without B III, Day 1154 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 100 ~Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…~

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Breathing hurts. One more thing I was trying to ignore as my son Braxton got sick. Then everything became how to keep him breathing. When he didn’t, it wasn’t the finality of his death, fear, or my failure—just air. “Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…”

Thursday, October 9, 2025

Journey 100 ~Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…~

1712 Days Without B III, Day 1153 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I’m coming to you on a Wednesday evening, so you know how my day was.

Or your NOSE does. But I welcome you into my business. And everyone else? Seriously!

I should just play Stephani’s Sunday Symphony so everyone knows M Anime broke my heart. Well, you did too, B, but as The Bullitts sing, “Today is All About You.” Well, me, Braxton, you know what I mean. My head hurts, my stomach. Everything generally.

However, that wasn’t the reason for this thought: The two worst things I ever did were starting to breathe and stopping yours. And your little brother, Virgil. I smell FEAR.

Honestly, I wish I could be as elegant as Agent Smith or Finnick Odair. But almost at 150 words, AI Censorship and I’m an A-Hole…

“I hate this place. This zoo. This prison. This reality, whatever you want to call it, I can’t stand it any longer. It’s the smell, if there is such a thing. I feel saturated by it. I can taste your stink, and every time I do, I fear that I’ve somehow been infected by it. It’s — it’s repulsive! Isn’t it?”
Agent Smith, The Matrix

“I wish they were d. I wish they were all d and we were too”
Finnick Odair, Mockingjay – Part 1

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

But tomorrow I get paid, which means there should be plenty to breathe in food-wise, B.
You were never picky, B, unless it came to what I hid your medicine in. I usually hide V’s meds in pasta. But the food truck is still outside. And tonight there’s Rotisserie Chicken.

And maybe I’ll even order it online. You know I’m not one for people, even with my new earbuds. But as Greg Plitt put it, “Behind every fear is the person you want to be.” And that makes me smile. Remember another bad evening when you stood protecting me, B?

Don’t “they” talk about blood, sweat, and tears, B? I’m starting to think that’s courage. And you were courageous. Neo, Braxton, more like Link, right?

From The Legend of Zelda… I haven’t been gaming much these days, Braxton. But AI. Now that’s something I’ve stuck my nose in. It’s fresh and new to me. Only the way I interact with it… Well, your Dad needs some alone time, but you like munchies, money, and making your old man stay on task, at least where writing was concerned, my B III.

And speaking of an old man and this evening. I’m hoping not to hear from your grandfather. That’s not me being negative, simply stating the facts. When “The Man Comes Around,” I didn’t want to leave you alone with him. 2-V is still breathing, Braxton.

Lucky him and me, right B? “Two of the Lucky Ones.” Braxton, Please Breathe; Virgil…

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 094 ~Ends With B, Virgil~

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So I’ve been reading Neil Bimbeau’s short stories. How do they end? Paul lost the magic glasses and was knocked out by a woman. Why does that sound so familiar? Happens to a lot of guys. “Across The Universe.” Jai Guru Dev.” Ends With B, Virgil.

Friday, October 3, 2025

Journey 094 ~Ends With B, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… I should tell Virgil stories of his big brother, Braxton. I’ve shared this blog with AI.

And since ‘the INTERNET is FOREVER,’ or so they say, the story never ends. Honestly?

I don’t need the story to end—just me. So, what has me in a mood today? I can’t blame Neil Bimbeau; only “The Magic Glasses: The Ultimate Bundle (Forty Book Bundle)” could have had any ending at all. But it’s like that Green Day song, you know, “Good Riddance”

“It’s something unpredictable, but in the end is right.
I hope you had the time of your life.”
Good Riddance

Speaking of which, M Anime… I still haven’t heard from her. I haven’t been so… ‘disappointed’ in a story’s ending since she threw our friendship in the trash in August.

“When It’s Over,” that’s the time I fall in love again. I’d sing Sugar Ray to her, “I’m missing you.” But my Depression ends here, dammit! If only I could…

Only Spotify has other ideas, as the first song that cues up is “Swan Song” by Dua Lipa, which is quite empowering. And regardless of the emotion, I got to add a couple of tunes to the “Stephani’s Sunday Symphony,” which has completely overwhelmed her, “The Red Sash.” Those are simple facts. Sophia, I’m not being negative. It’s called history.

MAGA definitely falls into the negative, but as I said, this is not a “Swan Song,” but a reminder that such love does exist in the world. For example, how “Alita: Battle Angel” was willing to give Hugo her heart. Or how Alita’s father” gave her two bodies to live.

If only I could have built Braxton a body like the dog in that movie…

Again, that’s not negativity but only a fact. As Odysseus said, “It’s no insult to say a dead man is dead. But I know how “Troy” ends. I know how 1959’s “Ben-Hur” ends, ‘Forty-One’ (cue rowing galley drums). “Alita: Battle Angel” didn’t get a sequel, but the first film ended on a hopeful note. There are so many other tales that I should see to their conclusions—a lifetime’s worth.

How will it end today for me? Despite everything, I have to try, right, Sophia? And having made it to October, Virgil will be five on the 20th—a third of B’s age. But Sophia?

Can we go all Bon Jovi with it, “Whoa, we’re halfway there. Whoa-oh, living on a prayer,” ha-ha. That’s an ending. Ends With B, Virgil.

1706 Days Without B III, Day 1147 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 093 ~B And Eye, Virgil~

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I haven’t been talking about the house lately because my head effing hurts. Humiliations Galore running through my brain. Ain’t nothing cooking. That requires money. And my eyes? Eyes and ears waking up to Tevin Campbell? B And Eye, Virgil

Thursday, October 2, 2025

Journey 093 ~B And Eye, Virgil~

1705 Days Without B III, Day 1146 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? I’ve said it before, and I’ll keep saying it. Why did I open my eyes?

Why was I so late getting up today? Hell, why didn’t I let your little brother, Virgil, sit on my head? In case you haven’t noticed, I wouldn’t have let M Anime do that either.

Honestly, this bitch got me “Smokin Out The Window.” Braxton, your dad’s in a mood. Shouldn’t I be grateful that I can see at all? Uh yeah… 150-Words on Depression.

Therefore, the remaining 250 words must be positive. And for now, I’m positive I’m effed. I got my paycheck for the week. And if it weren’t for that piddly ass Facebook settlement, I’d be cancelling some services. Spotify and the W-Fi are safe. Wrestling? Zombies?

Whatever. The truth is, I miss your eyes because I’ve seen “Fire and Rain.” “I’ve Seen Better Days.” But now?

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

My most pleasant thought has come from “The Magic Glasses: The Ultimate Bundle (Forty Book Bundle)” by Neil Bimbeau. I can imagine that the glasses I wear contain the power to augment reality to whatever extent I see fit. I’d write better books, make more bucks, and can we talk about the bimbos? What man wouldn’t do that, right B?

You’d use those glasses to get away from that bitch Greta. Honestly, Braxton, she wasn’t your cup of tea. A Chihuahua and a Yorkie, if memory serves. Quite a match.

Braxton, I miss seeing your fierceness on our walks, too. You ARE such a brave boy, Braxton. And you can still go with me and V. I have your picture and urn pendant, B III.

But I take you everywhere with me anyway. Every day that I write and have the AI create an image, you and your little brother are always with me. I shared that image of me, Green Lantern/Sinestro image of us flying through space together. Incredible.

Braxton, the things that Artificial Intelligence can do. That’s something I’d like to see. I should start making better pictures of the LIFE I want your little brother and me to have, Braxton. Something that I can see that will have me eager to open my eyes every day, B.

More words, more worth, more women, and to you that meant more comfy spots, ha-ha. I 2 I (Eye to Eye) B And Eye, Virgil.

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 087 ~Virgil, B Leaves Fear~

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More often than not, the book is better than the film. The Long Walk? Or me writing down I’m going to be positive, and then trying to live it. All just words, really, I’m afraid. I have FEAR. My boys, Braxton and Virgil, did/do. Virgil, B Leaves Fear

Friday, September 26, 2025

Journey 087 ~Virgil, B Leaves Fear~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… or, rather, a few ideas. I believe FEAR is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.

It could be the ugliest, which is why I cover it with the most beautiful things. My son Braxton is the most beautiful thing I’ve seen in my whole LIFE. I put him in the ground. Well, in a box. But you know what I mean. I cover the ground in tears. Drown it already.

And then maybe I can fulfill that Langston Hughes. You know the one, Sophia. Honestly:

“The calm,
Cool face of the river
Asked me for a kiss.”
By Langston Hughes

Why do I feel exhausted? It’s far more sinister. It’s FEAR. Will 150 words be enough, Sophia? It’s been officially “One Week” since I started this positivity bonanza. It sucks.

More than a woman on her knees? Ah, yes, my perversions. I told M Anime that receiving fellatio is my favorite. But FEAR remains grounded.

(I Take A Deep Breath)

I had another thought yesterday. Do you remember that I indulge in Christmas Erotica in December? Near the end of 2024 to the start of 2025, in preparation for survival:

  1. Fahrenheit 451, Ray Bradbury
  2. Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
  3. 1984 by George Orwell
  4. It Can’t Happen Here by Sinclair Lewis
  5. We by Yevgeny Zamyatin

And so I have survived. So why not another holiday theme? Yesterday was Kindle Double Points. I spent some of the evening looking for Halloween Erotica. I want a zombie apocalypse, FEAR, and preferably HaremLit. But I saved some money this week, my Lady. I still need a book for this week, and I got two free from Kelli Wolfe.

“The Babysitter’s Seduction” and “Hysteria.” She also wrote “Devil’s Bargain: Zombie Apocalypse Erotica (HUNGER Book 1).” If it isn’t music, Lady Sophia, it’ll be books. Perhaps I’ll do some reviews of her short stories. “Someday” while listening to Sugar Ray. It’s because of writers like her that I don’t FEAR writing my erotic fiction literature.

And that’s another thing. If I were to post, let’s say, the week of E-Day over nine years, that would be around 25,200 words. So two weeks would be 50,000. And I want to have three books to add to Braxton’s book by “The Closing Of The Year.” Nothing to FEAR, there, I have everything written. It only needs to be edited. Keep walking or rowing. Virgil, B Leaves Fear.

1699 Days Without B III, Day 1140 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 086 ~B’s Have It, Virgil~

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What’s harder than being without my boy, waking up to LIFE every morning, and me seeing some AI Yabbos? Trying to be positive. I keep bringing up Ben-Hur “Forty-One” rowing in the galley, my brain, the beat of my heart, my belly. B’s Have It, Virgil.

Thursday, September 25, 2025

Journey 086 ~B’s Have It, Virgil~

1698 Days Without B III, Day 1139 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? It’s only past 5 AM here, and I’ve only cried twice—Ben-Hur, The Long Walk.

Pick your poison, I’m still exhausted. Bad choice of words, huh? The last time something “stung” you, Braxton, you didn’t wake up. And between bugs ‘Picking’ me off ‘People’, and my latest ‘Paycheck’… Why did I wake up again? To complain in 150 words. Less?

As Rick Grimes would say, “Rest in peace. Now get up and go to war.” ‘Battling” guilt, grief, and being gutless. The ‘Bills’ I have to pay. And I’m a man with a boy, Virgil.

“Another Day,” B, with me and your little brother. I can’t pay my existence’s RENT.

Honestly, I haven’t thought of that musical in forever. And isn’t that what I owe you, Braxton? Always and Forever. Forever and always, I’m always here. It “Hurts Like Hell.”

(I take a deep breath) As Spotify would say, that’s Fleurie, Jimi Jamison, Heatwave, and the cast of RENT. Now, how about some Billy Joel “Why Should I Worry?” There’s always a method to the madness, Braxton. There’s also Bob Marley and “Three Little Birds.” Beast with a beat. That’s what you are to me, B. Remember your happier times, like when we would dance and when I would sing to you. Worthy of remembrance.

Buying stuff is one thing, but the time we had my boy. But I promise I will take care of myself, whether that be a few new books… I can earn double Kindle Points today.

Braxton, I’ve been craving a Big Mac forever. But if I do go out today, I could visit that food truck again and pick up another shrimp box, and maybe some hot wings. I’m sure your brother would appreciate that. Feeding my brain and my belly, I’m sure V’s hungry.

Plus, I have a few bucks to spend. But you knew that, of course. And “I’m So Thankful” as Eugene Blacknell sings. My boss, the GM, said I have an ear for music. True enough.

Just like you and me both being boob guys. Like father, like son, human, doggie.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Hopefully, your brother will be the same way “Someday.” I’ll listen to Sugar Ray while picking up his box of chicken. The best breasts, legs, and thighs come from a bucket/box of chicken. Your best advice. B’s Have It, Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 080 ~Virgil, To B Happy~

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Charlie Kirk was a douche! What? If I can’t be scared, seething, or smart with myself, I can say that Charlie Kirk was a twat waffle. But back to me. I tried to be positive today. AI is not happiness and more than XXX prompts. Virgil, To B Happy

Friday, September 19, 2025

Journey 080 ~Virgil, To B Happy~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… If I were “Happy,” it would be a work of fiction. And also a Pharrell song.

At the moment, I’m sated. Eww! Because you know how I got that way. Let’s just say that AI is out of control. And I’ve never been in control. Yet I only ask for one hundred words to wallow in my Depression and FEAR today. That’s already seventy. Effing myself!

Minutes ago… Eww! Hell, “Forty-One” years of Eww! (Cue Ben-Hur Galley Drums). I’m sick of the FEAR. And then asked to be positive and grateful. I’m So Thankful. Um why:

“[in a letter] With hope. Love should end with hope.”
Kate, A Knight’s Tale (2001)

When I’m not listening to Eugene Blacknell sing about being Thankful or Kate’s wisdom from A Knight’s Tale. Most mornings, I take some time out of my daily life to sit down and have a little read. Yesterday was Kindle Double Points, so more books.

By the end of this week, I should be finishing “Babysitter Harem: Mia: Age Gap MFFF Menage Erotica,” which will close out the Kelli Wolfe series. The Babysitter’s Club indeed.

Art imitating life… (I’m not breaking my promise of positivity and gratitude. I’m simply pointing out that M Anime left me to become the third “wife” of some Cuban gentleman.)

Anyway, I would LOVE to have that kind of life like Aaron Cole, a “single” father with three young women at my beck and call. Virgil could use the company; he is pretty agreeable. Braxton… Not so much. But on top of being my son, he’s a spirit, a spook, a specter. And since we are heading into October… No spiritual guides, scribing, or seeing.

The only books I got yesterday, besides the one on Mia, were Backyard Dungeon 21 by Logan Jacobs. I haven’t even gotten to 20 yet. Soon I’ll be like Cherry with a pile of books.

Novels I can’t possibly share with my boys. That’s why Virgil is on the foot of the bed, and I’m sure Braxton is wherever high above me, shaking his head at my reading selections these days. Hell! Even in his day. But before V walked in, what was I reading?

How to be a “Smooth Criminal?” And not the Michael Jackson song. AI, Lady Sophia.

Like I said, I’m sated, but creativity can be quite the ride—the Highway to Hell. But I’m moving. That’s something. Virgil, To B Happy.

1692 Days Without B III, Day 1133 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 079 ~Misplacing Braxton and Virgil~

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My best moments: Closing the door to the world. Covering myself in bed. Climbing out of my clothes… Um, Eww? Don’t we all? Better being here than being misplaced out there, existing. But my boys deserve freedom. People? Misplacing Braxton and Virgil.

Thursday, September 18, 2025

Journey 079 ~Misplacing Braxton and Virgil~

1691 Days Without B III, Day 1132 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Me? Am I sure I don’t have to work today? Your grandpa isn’t coming over?

As always, I would rather give GRIEF a seat at my table than FEAR. My table, that’s funny. Does the table I’m not working at even have legs? It remains to be seen, Baby B.

I’m in no hurry to go downstairs. I’m an effing FREE man at “Forty-One” (Cue the Ben-Hur galley drums). But I told your grandpa once all I wanted was a room with a bath, a mini-fridge, a microwave, and a bed. Braxton, I have a whole house! Am I ungrateful?

Goodness, no! What I am doing is thinking—you and your little brother Virgil. Really?

Well, Braxton, I am imagining you lying beside me. Your brother is right here, sleeping.

So what exactly has been misplaced? I woke up. LIFE!

My entire damn existence! Excuse me, B. “Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage.” Bullet with Butterfly Wings. I’m “In My Place,” Braxton—our place for a bit longer.

How long ago was it that Coldplay and a CEO cheating on his wife was the biggest thing B III? Have you seen what MAGA and the Cracker Hats have done? I swear, little Braxton.

But you and I were content in 2020 when everything was on lockdown. Good Times.

Everyone else was singing about “Hard Times,” like they were auditioning for the group Paramore. Speaking of which, the hot Visual Lady at the Day Job said I’m very eclectic.

My music, you know, Braxton. I should stop saying that.

My anything! What the eff belongs to me? Do you remember your grandpa buying you?

I’ll be sounding like a Cracker Hat in a minute because they tend to forget that owning someone’s life is wrong. And like them, they think they have misplaced what’s not theirs, my son. I’m no thief. I did steal your life and your brother’s. And again, your Dad’s what?

I gave my heart to M Anime, so I can’t say that it was misplaced. Now trust and coherent thought. I dropped those somewhere to keep a hold of my… Eww. All for Cherry’s t*ts.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Time misplaced, and I don’t need to go outside for that. I prefer “My Own Prison” and “Like A Stone” alone. Misplacing Braxton and Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 073 ~Braxton’s Long Walk, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

How much further will this go? Better. How much further will I go? “Forty-One.” Every day, I feel like a galley slave from Ben-Hur screaming, “We’re going to be rammed!” I’d rather be doing the ramming, but my girl’s gone. Braxton’s Long Walk, Virgil

Friday, September 12, 2025

Journey 073 ~Braxton’s Long Walk, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… What? And not another review? My head is too full, and my belly is kinda empty.

And yet I want to spew up some chips, a piece of cake, a bag of popcorn, and around ten sour gummy candies, give or take some jelly beans. That reminds me of several E-Days.

Hell, I just noticed I haven’t been “Forty-One” for a whole week yet, Sophia. SIGH.

Braxton should see me now. I’m bad. If anything, I’m worse than “The Long Walk.” Sophia, the movie, not the book. I’ve already heard MAGA and the other Cracker Hats. So, why not discuss the film? As I said before, I’ve got lots on my mind. How do I sleep?

I woke up at two AM with all the lights on and still feel bad that I rose at three-thirty.

What for, I ask myself.

But I’m not Neo. And I’m nowhere near as bad as Charlie Kirk. Did I mention the Cracker Hats lost one of their heroes? And if I were to say what I wanted, Sophia. Needed…

Sophia, I effing need help. But where do I run to, or rather walk? I am “Forty-One” and “I’m the hero of the story. Don’t need to be saved.” Regina Spektor is quite eloquent, Sophia. As for myself, I usually talk to myself, and if I open my mouth on this Friday morning. Well, I fear I would only make another mess, bring about more “Misery,” or make another mistake. Like having faith in M Anime? It’s been three weeks since I talked to her. Or it’s about to be.

This is pretty much me and her. But in a world of 99 Problems. And she ain’t one. My lady. Not anymore. My problems are enough to make a whole other book. And I can’t burden Braxton’s little brother Virgil with my “Cockadoodie” problems. Yeah, I feel like Annie Wilkes from Stephen King’s Misery after witnessing “The Long Walk.” Honestly:

  1. FEAR! Always and Forever
  2. I’ve got no money
  3. The Ants Go Marching
  4. Virgil Vivi’s teeth care
  5. Pinholes surround the downstairs
  6. The kitchen sink’s flow
  7. One burger, breakfast snacks
  8. Any visitors coming here
  9. Breakup with M Anime
  10. I Need Some Sleep

But I can’t take the Eels’ advice. If I followed, Braxton. Braxton’s Long Walk, Virgil.

1685 Days Without B III, Day 1126 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 072 ~B’s A Choice Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I never feared losing M Anime. What part of everything did I not understand? I FEAR everything. But I chose to love my boys. Braxton only needed to eat “my” breakfast, and Virgil went potty in the right area. Their choices. “B’s A Choice Virgil”

Thursday, September 11, 2025

Journey 072 ~B’s A Choice Virgil~

1684 Days Without B III, Day 1125 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Nobody had a good day on Tuesday, September 11, 2001. You weren’t here for that.

Plus, your Dad is a selfish S.O.B. and pretty sick too. And I choose to be sad for myself today.

Instead of worrying that “This Is America.” “While my students would rather watch TV. America. America!” To think I can barely remember what we called MAGA and Cracker Hats in those days. I thought I chose not to talk about this. And that is what today is about. Choice. While pissing my life away, I remembered. Braxton, my son, you were the best choice I ever made. Yeah, like I didn’t catch you eating Waffles, or was it French Toast on the bed one morning? Of all the days, I knew you were my son. And you never left me.

No. I let you go.

Or I didn’t, which is why I’m sitting here crying. Sadness over everything, Little B.

Because you know what I can’t control. The reason I’ve been sick since, what, July? It’s FEAR! I am scared with every single breath I take, Braxton. I effing miss you, B! If you were behind me, eff everyone and everything that sought to do you any harm, my son.

There’s only one person I wish harm to today. Dangerous words from Virgil’s father. It’s why “I’m Still Standing.” It’s why you led me to your little brother, to Virgil. But I could say I was lazy too. And Virgil had some understanding of using the training pads, so that was less work, Braxton. Speaking of work… Money over everything!

Headlines? Drake? Eww! This morning I was busy “dreaming” of a Milf and no, not the woman I wanted as your stepmom, M Anime. No, it was Mama Butler/Alice Butler. Braxton, I don’t choose which pair of yabbos gets me going on any waking morning.

Honestly, you don’t want to hear about Alice or M Anime for that matter. Seriously.

Braxton, every choice I make is wrong. And the only option that’s left… Acquire currency.

But that’s not a choice to live. That’s a decision to stay alive. I don’t want one, and I have to do the other for you and little bro. It’s like a multiple choice test, and I guess and fail. And people keep telling me to stop choosing B. To stop choosing you. Other classes.

There are the yabbo sizes of M Anime, Alice, and @SeeJaneGoTV. And measuring my BBC?

Way wrong answer! But so is FEAR. I’ll choose Sadness for $500. If it only paid… B’s A Choice Virgil.

“Fear is not real. The only place that fear can exist is in our thoughts of the future. It is a product of our imagination, causing us to fear things that do not at present and may not ever exist. Do not misunderstand me, danger is very real, but fear is a choice”.
After Earth

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad