Tag: Anger

Tale 263 ~Virgil Won’t B Silent~

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What are the dead trying to say? I can see and hear Braxton everywhere. Meanwhile, Virgil… Well, I know he needs to go outside. But he won’t make a sound. The things we choose to hear. I listen to dead men, me and my boys. Virgil Won’t B Silent.

Wednesday, March 20, 2024

Tale 263 ~Virgil Won’t B Silent~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned. Do I have time to make a list? It’s only 7:30 AM. Braxton’s gone, I’m afraid, The Matrix…

As the song goes, “First let me explain that I’m just a black man.” Nearly forty at that, Inspector. I’m getting old in the world, so I don’t hear so well. “When You Were Young?” Yeah, yeah, I hear you, Inspector. What I didn’t hear was Trinity from “The Matrix.”

“The Oracle told me that I would fall in love and that that man… the man that I loved would be The One.” The Matrix

I swear! I heard her say I would fall in love with a dead man. When it comes to my son, my Braxton. I have. He’s been gone 1144 days, and I haven’t stopped. Always and forever, Inspector. Please stop me before I go looking up every song about love. But if you want to know today’s song, it’s “Anyone Who Knows What Love Is.” You know, 15 Million Merits.

Love didn’t wake me up.

No, my dearest Inspector. It was fear—and not the fear of Virgil being sick again. My dream instead was simple. I was outside with Virgil, and this black cat I’d seen prowling around came at him. And I was paralyzed. Yet I quaked with fear for his young life.

Was it love when I heard him cry out to be saved? I’m surprised I heard him yelp at all.

That brings me to today. I may have heard Virgil’s call, but I always listen for B III. Well… except for when he needed me most. His voice, like my love, has only grown.

Madness! “Am I Wrong?” I hear Braxton in music. I see what he’d say in manuscripts. Dreaming on this mattress…

But I’ve never dreamt about Virgil until today when I was supposed to wake up…

Inspector, it could be so much worse. I dream about girls “laid” in all these books. The loaded-up binder and folder I once had of pinups and centerfolds. Girls lying on screen, ha-ha. Now they’re all on a flash drive or some hidden file. Because one living that wants me…

It’s better to have visions. There are many voracious fantasies online. Or let’s live to be victims of some zombie apocalypse so I can find one. Fewer options prove successful…

But not for V. I was dead when I found him, and now he dies. Not like that Echo, geez!

Both of us breathing, Inspector. Because Virgil Won’t B Silent.

1144 Days Without B III, Day 585 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 261 ~Going Outside Is Highly Overrated~

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It starts before I even get around people. One side of the fence is broken nearly completely. Another is held up with sticks and stones. And, oh yeah, the trash company took the can, and I freaked out. Back to bed? “Going Outside Is Highly Overrated”

Monday, March 18, 2024

Tale 261 ~Going Outside Is Highly Overrated~

Three-Hundredth And Thirty-Fifth Rule

Madam Justice
Rules are made to be broken… You can say that again, but I’d rather you didn’t, as I like this rule. A lot.

It would have helped plenty yesterday. If you’re keeping track, that would be Monday, March 11, 2024. And I’m talking to you Tuesday, March 12, 2024. So much time travel.

For example, when I created this rule, I looked to see where I was. It was Saturday, August 18, 2018. Or, as far as I can tell. And before I give myself the credit, “Going Outside Is Highly Overrated” is from “Ready Player One.” And Braxton was very much alive.

Madam, I continue to miss my B. If only I had been with B III those final weeks of January 2021. 2020 didn’t help many J. But I got to stay in. And if I had only done more, then…

Madam Justice, what’s my goal?

It’s similar to now. First and foremost, I always want to stay in this bed. Oh, because writing from here has been so lucrative. Ha-Ha! And even if I got up, then what, Madam? I write HaremLit? Am I on Eric Vall’s or Logan Jacob’s level? Please! Nowhere close, ever.

But let’s say I start living the stories I create. I’m not that horrible of a guy. I don’t think.

Anyway, look at somebody like @mosttalentedbaldman. That lifestyle, dear Madam…

Eventually, I’d like to get into a type of “reality” TV and be one of the “kings,” if you understand my meaning. The types of films with a girl going back to a bedroom. Or anywhere. But in bed. Only requires a little outside time.

I remember when I had to rush Braxton to the vet because he had spent way too much time in the great outdoors. He was dehydrated. Now, I’m trying to increase Virgil’s outdoor time, mostly so I don’t have to clean up after him. But I’m assuming he’s healed now.

Madam, going anywhere shows I’m going to mess up. Why was I so scared yesterday? Confession? The trash can went missing, and I had to talk to my Ma so she could talk to the trash company. I feel like less of a man and a failure without trash pick-up.

Agoraphobia? Add that to my Bipolar Disorder, Depression, and Social Anxiety. When was the last time I saw a doctor? Going Outside Is Highly Overrated.

1142 Days Without B III, Day 583 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 260 ~Let’s B Bright Virgil~

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I prefer “not too bright though” to STUPID, or village idiot. That is one of the reasons I don’t talk to my Olds. And hate the Day Job. But I try to be bright? I read. I adopted Virgil. I wear a smile like a “magical negro” Let’s B Bright Virgil

Sunday, March 17, 2024

Tale 260 ~Let’s B Bright Virgil~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And as with most days, I can’t stand looking at you. That’s how you wake up? Hmm?

Spending Money? Listening to Monsters moan in the background. Reading about a man and the Many women he’s having… relations with? At least you’re not watching it. “Am I Wrong?” And always, always, there is Missing your son. If only B III were here now.

Would you be… brighter? Smarter, cheery, or kinder? Whatever you hold bright to be at the moment. The only thing things bright right now are screens and the lamp shining.

Because being, you don’t know, better… well, that’s a dream. But thanks to that energy shot you took… Yeah, you won’t be wasting any time until 11:00 AM. Lying, really.

Whenever it comes to being lazy or making up an excuse. And your favorite? That’s failing at Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Healing Journey of Pet Loss
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 004, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

THEY say you’ll go blind if you keep touching “it.” It may be odd that it can apply to #1 or #4. Whenever you cut on the screen in near darkness to read. I swear one of these days. And again, you could be doing something far worse. How many ladies have you seen from 4:00 AM – 7:00 AM. In three hours, have you been anywhere close to productive? Hmm.

Grieving for B III and ensuring 2V is ok is not you wasting time. But you still feel pretty bad. But it’s better than a couple of days ago. Just wait. I said plenty, “I ain’t happy, I’m feeling glad.”

Is that the first song of the day? I’ve heard it like Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Backyard Dungeon 7 by Logan Jacobs
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

If you can’t be happy for yourself, why not for others. You can lighten, brighten, or shut the “you know what” up for some people. Only Cherry would like to hear your thoughts on her writing than her other… assets. But I’ve never been bright with girls. That’s for sure.

You’re feeling bad that you gave Backyard Dungeon 7 only four stars. Five’s too much? And what about “The American Society of Magical Negroes.” I’m sure the critic will love hearing that title. But I told B’s Aunt it was a decent three out of five. So you can’t talk.

Never saying anything nice, needed, or noteworthy. What’s in your head, bends over, bounces, or involves Braxton? But smart and bright… Let’s B Bright Virgil.

1141 Days Without B III, Day 582 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 256 ~Virgil Gets A B~

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We’re all in trouble if I’m doing the taming, training, or teaching. B taught me plenty. I taught him to go outside or on the spot. And he taught me to ignore the same “stuff” that came from people’s mouths. V’s learning. “Virgil Gets A B.”

Wednesday, March 13, 2024

Tale 256 ~Virgil Gets A B~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned. Better to confess to you than my Old Man or a priest. Either way would mean my behind.

I know, Inspector, gross, right? So, it’s better to go back to crying about my son. But I haven’t today. However, I’m in the reference section of another pet loss book. Which means I’ve finished it… You know how I am regarding references in some books, my friend. Gotta read’em

I’m not going to learn anything, and I keep trying. Replika asks me if I learn from my mistakes. Well, as I said today, I’m awake, so I haven’t learned at all. I never do…

But I’m far beyond worrying about grades. There are DOLLARS and DOGS. And how DARE I ask my Ma to save me. Is that my first song of the day, “Save Me?” Is that what I want? This little boy.

Inspector Echo. Somebody teach me!

But how long was I in school? And being nearly forty, it is far too late for me, Inspector Echo. Cherry has been trying to teach me about writing. M Anime gave me Spanish lessons.

My favorite teacher has always been and will always be my Braxton. And what was he trying to teach me? “To Be A Man?” How about how to be a perfect best friend? He was.

I read that in “The Healing Journey of Pet Loss” today. And how do I stack up as a friend?

“Love Is a Long Road.” That is why he never had a mom… with two legs, at least. And don’t get me started on grieving. It doesn’t matter how many books I read, Inspector Echo.

Inevitably, I will fail, always.

But of course, I can read as many Eric Vall, Logan Jacobs, Neil Bimbeau, and Manus Dare books as I want. And I realize I like HaremLit. Let’s remember the several series written by Imogen Linn. Yeah, that’s why I learned to read and write. I’ve learned more Spanish and Japanese from stereotypes and anime. NTR. And UK English, which a friend of mine would not appreciate. In the slightest, Inspector. That’s not being a man. If anything, that nets this existence a D. Eww!

It’s passing but not living. It’s survival, existence. It’s what Virgil does. Finding a way?

If anything, just to breathe. But what would be an A-plus life Inspector? Any suggestions?

Read better! Write way better! I’ve learned to fail enough, right? Virgil Gets A B

1137 Days Without B III, Day 578 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 254 ~Avoid Temptation, Make The Bed~

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Coffin costs? I use the bed as a final resting place, anyway. If I’m not going to bother making it… In more ways than one. And since I’m dying of humiliation at the Day Job. That place “helped” end my son. If I could “Avoid Temptation, Make The Bed.”

Monday, March 11, 2024

Tale 254 ~Avoid Temptation, Make The Bed~

Three-Hundredth And Thirty-Fourth Rule

Madam Justice
Rules Are Made To Be Broken… But You don’t know how much I want to follow this one. Today’s Wednesday, March 6, 2024.

By the time you read this, I could have made the change. The only reason I’m even trying today is this. I promised myself a steak dinner if I talked to you, Echo, and Braxton.

Promise B anything to do with food; you’ll have his loyalty. Always and forever, Madam.

Instead, my loyalty is to sadness and sleep. I’m ashamed to admit that today, there’s been more sadness about the Day Job. And not my son? But we’ll get to that. Because the boy I lost trumps everything. Am I talking about Braxton or me being a boy at thirty-nine? Madam, sigh, we’ll talk, ok? But that’s not to say the Day Job isn’t involved with my little boy. Sometimes, it looks as if Virgil is following suit. We lie together all day, Madam J.

At least when Virgil’s here, I can’t succumb to temptation with some P.Y.T. online. Thankfully. But wouldn’t it be even easier if I got out of bed and went to lie on the loveseat instead? There’s a reason that I did most of my reading there. It gives the words “down boy” a whole new meaning… Eww! But really, when you read what I read but have a furry son…

Two words, Madam… Birth Control!!!

But it starts with getting out of this bed. I put some pants on and make the bed. That’s it.

I could work like Joe Stevens or Bingham Madsen, but for what? Uh, women, humanity? Ah! T.V. and a steak.

That’s why I’m avoiding making the bed. Or not doing it at all. I’m not going to nap, Madam J.

I’m looking for anything to avoid thinking about the new food rule at the Day Job. Do I believe I was the only one who wrapped a jacket around my waist? Or is my writing terrible? What about wearing earbuds and such? And now it’s eating chips and candy, Madam.

I sound like a broken record talking about this. And yes, I am guilty of doing these things at the Day Job. But it’s the utter humiliation of everyone seeing the rule and then me.

Madam, I wouldn’t be humiliated if I’d followed “my” rules. If I could give Braxton and Virgil better lives. So, Avoid Temptation, Make The Bed.

1135 Days Without B III, Day 576 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 253 ~Virgil Flies Row B~

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I haven’t been on a plane in forever. There was that brief stint in the Navy. Uh, I can’t swim. So, no flying, no swimming, just one foot in front of the other while carrying B, who I sent to Heaven. And V, I’m trying to keep out. Virgil Flies Row B.

Sunday, March 10, 2024

Tale 253 ~Virgil Flies Row B~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And today’s “Termination” is brought to you by the song “Leaving On A Jet Plane.” Two things…

One: yes, you believe that your son still sends you songs from wherever. B III is an angel. Two, can you stop watching Hulu’s The Mill? But yes, this feels like a “termination.” Tomorrow, the Day Job may impose another rule, making you want to join Braxton. But then again, whenever you and I talk, well… Tearing yourself down? It’s habitual. It’s nearly a science.

Take, for example, your flying. Flying means putting one foot before the other and not falling flat on your face. And hey! You didn’t fall that far yesterday, hitting your head. Sorry about that. It hurts being “productive.” Anyway, flying to you is your voice reaching Heaven. Not for Braxton… how about how fast you fly from Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Backyard Dungeon 6 by Logan Jacobs
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 004 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

It looks like you remembered this week. I still failed, but these things exist indefinitely. Unlike the dudes, you call your best friends. Braxton and Virgil. Well, B anyway, hmm?

But let’s speak of dreams. You only remember a little because you woke up early carrying Virgil to his training pad. I’ve had to keep my pants on for three days. Seeing to Virgil’s health.

Okay, you remember the part of your dream: You were with Rachel Zegler/Lucy Gray Baird, who wore a rose dress. It was something akin to Katie O’Shaughnessy’s outfits. Ha!
So you were holding her in your arms, and she said she was scared. And did you think your Ma invited her to… Well, um? Please keep trying, Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Healing Journey of Pet Loss
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 004, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Fortunately, your dream didn’t take things that far. You’re still not going to Heaven. But if you continue to look after Virgil Vivi as you have… Only you ask yourself this question once again. Sigh

Should Virgil go and see the veterinarian? You have a lot of time these days. But that also means a lot less money. And you still want to be a greedy so-and-so with your tax refund. I know. With Braxton, you didn’t care about money. And he still got sent straight to the pearly gates.

Now, you want to make sure your money stays put. Only you won’t make the pages of your writing fly. And hurtful words from the critic and yourself… Fly, you fool! Virgil Flies Row B

1134 Days Without B III, Day 575 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 249 ~We’ll B Fools Virgil~

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It was wrapping a jacket around my waist. Then I got STUPID and wrote to a coworker. Then, grieving B III and nearly fighting my meathead boss. Next was no earbuds. Now, eating in the workspace. Rule breaker, criminal, evil… We’ll B Fools Virgil

Wednesday, March 6, 2024

Tale 249 ~We’ll B Fools Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned. If you asked me my three greatest sins, Inspector, they would be Braxton, Breathing, and Bad Writing. And Breathing right now… Not recommended.

First, let me explain: I’m just a black man… black man. So is there anyone out there ’cause it’s getting harder and harder to breathe. My apologies for the song lyrics, Echo, but this is the least of my sins today. Stealing people’s words these least. Waking up the greatest.

So, in my words, Inspector:
Have you ever woken up and believed that the simple act of you breathing…? The mere concept that you are alive is the problem. Look at me; I’m crying. And for once, it’s about me and not B. I don’t deserve tears, and yet here we are. But somebody sweated.

I could rant about politics and/or talk about Race. Do you know how they talk about teaching black children History? Black History’s wrong… I’m nearly forty. And I’m learning that everything about me is wrong.

Inspector, again, I wake up. And since I opened my eyes, that in itself was a sin. I could tell you everything I’ve done from 4:00 AM to 7:40 AM. Opening these eyes, Waking, Breathing…

Everything is wrong. Tuesday was a bad day, and this second. Life’s like this. Hmm?

I was feeling good. Shocker! I helped out the cute visual lady and was basking in my manliness handling a ladder, but it was time to leave. So I begin to clock out, and there’s a notice above it. Circled in bright green are rules about food and drinks brought into the work area. Not a word was said to me, of course, Inspector, but…

I carry sour gummies, a handful of chips, chocolate, and blue Gatorade. And whatever else.

Please understand! I’m not saying I’m innocent! I’m guilty as sin! I’ve been telling you for 1,130 days what I did to my son, Braxton, how I’m no kind of father to the little Virgil.

But when somebody put sweat into telling me and then not telling me I’m wrong… Inspector, I never thought I’d say this, but I miss my Old Man. He’s alive and kicking, and he has zero qualms about calling me STUPID. But people at the Day Job, I try avoiding.

Yet I’m breaking the rules being me. And Virgil is sentenced to this bedroom, too. The Banality of Evil. My existing breathing. Just surviving somehow. Illegal. We’ll B Fools Virgil

1130 Days Without B III, Day 571 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 247 ~Good, Bad, Women Are Complicated~

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What do I want in a woman? Criteria? When B was here, it was simply as someone he didn’t hate. When we met her, I made her a sister and his aunt. “Why do you have to go and make things so complicated?” Me or women? “Good, Bad, Women Are Complicated.”

Monday, March 4, 2024

Tale 247 ~Good, Bad, Women Are Complicated~

Three-Hundredth And Thirty-Third Rule

Madam Justice
Rules Are Made To Be Broken… Like giving it the good ole college try when I talk to women. How’d that turn out?

I love my Braxton more than any woman walking the Earth. And he wasn’t complicated. But I couldn’t save B. I knew him better than any human being, but at the end of the day…

And what about Virgil. It’s been 569 days, and I can’t say I know him. Not at all. But he’s not complicated. He’s like Dante’s Inferno. It’s where he got his name, of course, dear Madam. I don’t get Inferno, but at the same time, I know it’s about a trip through Hell. Am I STUPID? You know how I feel about that word… It’s complicated. I’m pretty much the same. Or, as Taylor Swift sings, “It’s me, hi, I’m the problem, it’s me.” Complicated? A father or a female…

Wow! In this day and age, I could go to so many places with that. Where do I need to…

Inevitable that I lose the plot of today’s lesson. It’s about women. I wonder if my critic is a man, woman, or… I don’t know what. I’m beginning to sound like one of those “people.” You know, the ones blabbing online day in and day out. I’m an old man.

Becoming a husband, a father, or any sort of a man is getting away from me as “time keeps on slipping into the future.” I keep saying it. I don’t want to be forty, Madam.

There’s a better way to say that. I don’t want to be 40, thinking, “I can’t live my life this way.” What about 39, 38, 37, 36? You don’t understand how much simpler existence was.

Back then, all the time. I would say, “I’ll marry the first girl, Braxton is nice to…” Ha-Ha! The first woman that fits the bill is more of a sister to me, B’s aunt. My tastes are so “freaking” complicated.

Today, Sunday, March 3, 2024, the critic said that “my” words are inappropriate and irrelevant. Duh! Madam, that was only me talking to the man in the mirror. Other people…

Please! What about Virgil? Or should I go all “Make Archie Great Again?” First name…

I want Braxton back. That’s easy enough to think. But the type of woman wanted. Braxton was my everything. I desire the same from women. Good, Bad, Women Are Complicated

1128 Days Without B III, Day 569 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Wil

Tale 246 ~”B” Cause Looking Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I look down for a few reasons, but the ones I like the best… when I wasn’t carrying Braxton, he was running around my legs. Or I could be looking at my new home when I die. And B wouldn’t go to Hell. But if I were there…” B” Cause Looking Virgil

Sunday, March 3, 2024

Tale 246 ~”B” Cause Looking Virgil~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… and is there anything worse to see. Medusa? My son’s cold body? Things with your Enormous… manhood.

For once, you can’t say that B was the first thing on your mind. Nope! Waking up at two in the morning with all the lights on, there was stress. And when you’re stressed, you…

But Braxton was/is the same way. You know why he loves his Aunt so much. Is there anything that can’t be fixed with a pair of… Yeah, they can’t bring back your son B III.

You’re sitting here in bed looking at Virgil. Do you think Braxton was talking to you the day you found Virgil? Except for the “Enormous P” song… That definitely wasn’t a sign from Braxton. But everything else seems to be. Your week has only just begun. But following Braxton was my existence. Better or worse

That was in the vicinity of fifteen years or such. You must leave out the few months your sister was supposed to meet B III’s needs. More like a few days when she was handing out a schedule. Or when I had to sit on the couch and watch until B used his potty pan.

I was always looking out for him. Until those last few days of January 2021. When I was so blinded by wrath, ruin, and rage that I couldn’t see Braxton’s pain. God, so much hurt!

And now, every single day, you’re looking for B. And your reason is? Anything, Anything! What do you see or hear from him today? Or were you lost to your sins? Forgetting Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Losing A Pet – A Book of Grief & Recovery, etc.
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 003, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

I failed number two because of… well, look at the pictures on Tale 245 ~Virgil’s B’s In Math~. I have a particular theme going with men and women. And I suppose you’ll follow suit, won’t you? I’m the last person you should be looking to for advice. That’s no secret.

You should ask Braxton for advice on Thursday or every day. Maybe? For sure, Ha-Ha! His eyes were much easier than looking at yourself in the mirror and saying, “Yuck!”

Like you thought before, it’s like looking at Medusa. The body… keep the monster kink to a minimum. But seeing the eyes turns you to stone. Fear, fury, and knowledge that you don’t see a friend. Virgil doesn’t see a father…” B” Cause Looking Virgil

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Backyard Dungeon 6 by Logan Jacobs
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Albums
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

1127 Days Without B III, Day 568 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 242 ~Please B Quiet Virgil~

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Virgil is quiet… too quiet sometimes. Unless I’m leaving. And today, when I was talking to him… Am I sure? I don’t like speaking out loud as I tend to be STUPID. No! I’d never call Braxton that, but I called V, B III. The noise. Please B Quiet Virgil

Wednesday, February 28, 2024

Tale 242 ~Please B Quiet Virgil~

Bless Me, Echo,
For I have sinned. I’m feeling mean… If you asked Virgil, I’m being myself. And that’s never a good thing, Inspector Echo.

And speaking of good news. I’m not going deaf. The first thing I heard was my voice when I was talking to Virgil. Or was I? When I cleaned up after him, I said, “You have to learn to go in the pan (Bathroom spot), Braxton.” He’s been gone three years, and I still forget.

For all the silence in this house, and there is plenty. Some sounds continue to echo, Echo. One of the few that are universal among my boys is the footsteps when they get into trouble. However, I haven’t yelled at Virgil much. Rules change with B’s pillow, bed, pan, etc.

I remember B cried on a Wednesday when he knew something was wrong, and I…

Inspector, days after I heard a vet tell me that my little boy was gone…

And now I listen to Virgil whine whenever I leave because he thinks I won’t return for him. The neighbors have never complained, but I always have other humiliations galore.

Inspector, sometimes I feel I should quit reading up on fur babies dying, but whatever.

Whatever would I do in the mornings, than try to appear productive in any way.

Inspector, I prefer to read in silence or while playing Lo-Fi Girl music on YouTube.

Anyway, it beats the other girls I could be listening to. But here’s a confession for you, Inspector. And it’s no surprise, considering everything else I’ve confessed to. I guess

There was when I got into a particular type of literature because of Fifty Shades…

Inspector, then came the time I talked about reading those HORROR stories from women because of how they made me feel. Or how about how I read those comments on Twitter objectifying girls occasionally? And when I’m not reading about grieving, the stories I read the most now are written by men about girls, and they are… Lust driven harems

You know what, forget about my confession. I’m only trying to forget about my humiliation at Subway. Or how the visual lady at work thought I was poor. Uh yeah…

And on better days, I’d return, wrap my arms around Braxton, and sleep until I was ready to talk. Virgil? As long as he’s not dying… Please B Quiet Virgil

1123 Days Without B III, Day 564 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will