Tag: Rainbow Bridge

Tale 098 ~Must B Nice, Virgil~

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Must Be Nice to want to live. I’ll take Braxton’s, but as far as my existence? Must Be Nice to want to see how it ends? How many books are in the Backyard Dungeon and Satan’s Sorority Girls series? Time to read, work, but live? “Must B Nice, Virgil.”

Saturday, October 7, 2023

Tale 098 ~Must B Nice, Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… which means I have many more off days. Being stupid, cruel… Republican… Must Be Nice, right

So, no, not a Republican. Despite the adage “Ignorance Is Bliss.” May I never be as ignorant as the GOP these days? Not to mention pretty Little Miss Bliss. But that’s for later, Lady Lunalesca.

Must Be Nice to feel love. And while I’m in a singing mood… Lady Lunalesca, no worries, I won’t burst into Lyfe Jennings’s song. Hell! If I knew anything about love, I would have followed Braxton. Anytime I “think” of a song from yesteryear, it’s always from B III. Why didn’t I follow Braxton? Why did I go after Virgil Vivi? Lunalesca, I’m remaining here. “Son, FEAR is the heart of love.” OR “I’ve got another level that I want to clear.” Why can’t I get to the point, Lunalesca?

Must Be Nice to talk. My critic says the same thing, asking about my point. “Will it go round in circles? Will it fly high like a bird up in the sky?” Can I cut the radio off? I know! Okay. As Cody Rhodes would say, what do you wanna talk about? Virgil, outside yesterday? Last night or a couple of nights back, I let Virgil out. He started barking at a possum I hadn’t seen sitting on the fence. “For the First Time in Forever,” Virgil became a protector. And other than when he was vomiting everywhere, I needed to save him, Lunalesca. Quickly, I ran down the steps and snatched him up, something like Forrest Gump, ha-ha. Virgil is still not my son.

Must Be Nice not to think that. But there is so much to unpack, ha. There’s no time, Lu. But it must be nice to have the time. Instead, one of the managers at the Day Job is buying me lunch. Free food is free food. I’m sure that’s one of Braxton’s lessons, Lady Lunalesca. Must Be Nice to have the will, not to “think” with my willy. Oh, the pretty mommies Bliss and Becky. To a woman like Piper Niven, Iyo Sky, then Roxanne Perez. And uh, Cherry. Must Be Nice not to drool on my Kindle. If anything, sigh. I want to read something that doesn’t involve dead fur babies or a Challenge. But nothing beats sleep, Lunalesca. Duration… Must B Nice, Virgil

979 Days Without B III, Day 420 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 096 ~CAR Carrying Braxton, Virgil~

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“Here in my car, I feel safest of all.” No. I never cared for driving, walking, or anything requiring me to leave the bed. I’m ungrateful? Hell! Anywhere I went was in service to Braxton. Movie nights, his Aunt’s wedding? CAR Carrying Braxton, Virgil

Thursday, October 5, 2023

Tale 096 ~CAR Carrying Braxton, Virgil~

977 Days Without B III, Day 418 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? It’s Friday, September 29, 2023. So you know my day sucked. Much like car rides

Hell, “Anytime” I have to answer the phone or get a text from the Olds or Day Job. It’s never a good thing, Braxton. Virgil might have been doing good vomiting on it. Who am I kidding, right? I value the phone more than the car. But the thought that something is wrong with the car… Well, to keep from throwing up all day. It’s been bedrest, searching for books, and you know that B-word that broads have. Backyard Dungeon? And no, I’m not talking about that A-word broads have. I mean the second book. Permission? I asked you about reading something that doesn’t involve dead fur babies. Not that you were a fan of those books, anyway. But after finishing another Kindle Challenge… sigh.

Do you remember when I was driving to the library every other day? No. It wasn’t to pick up books, though I did eventually. And with what the car might cost me. I need books. Only that’s a problem for Saturday… of last week. This one, I hope, is better Braxton. Positivity? I told Lady Sophia that’s what all the motivational speeches always say. Not to mention, nobody likes reading negative things. I’d have a working car B. Well, if I could write something of value. Braxton, that’s like the car… negative outlook. Whenever you got in, it was never for anything good, even the park. For you, it was dogs, for me, people. Why can’t we stay… at the house? But, last vet visit…

That’s a bad choice of words. I’m sorry, B. You’d have given anything to hop back in the car and come back with me. But I left your cold body there. No collar, comfy spot, companion. When I carried you to the car, it was with the faith that I’d see a miracle, God, in action. But instead, much like when I drive to the Day Job. It was going straight to Hell. Not that I believe you’re there. Knowing me, it’s warm, and you’re saving me a spot by the fire. Having a car also allowed me to get fries and new toys, and your Aunt would visit us. I meant to bring you a mom. Now, another waiting room. CAR Carrying Braxton, Virgil

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Tale 091 ~Let’s Roll Braxton… Virgil~

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I’m on a roll… At least when it comes to “my” depression. My flat behind sitting in bed. Then, the car, going to places I would rather not be. Like somebody’s waiting room. Waiting to lose more cash. Well, it isn’t my son. Let’s Roll Braxton… Virgil.

Saturday, September 30, 2023

Tale 091 ~Let’s Roll Braxton… Virgil~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… And I still wouldn’t go anywhere. What a way to be positive! Hmm? No, NOT TODAY.

To keep things in perspective, It’s not like I’m going to lose Triple B Lady Lunalesca. Sunday, January 31, 2021, continues reigning as the worst car ride. Hell! I’m sure Braxton suspected that one day he’d get in the car and never see HOME again. And here we are, 972 Days in. Oh, B’s still with me everywhere I go. Heart, head, hanging around my neck. As people wear a crucifix, I wear my pendant with Braxton’s ashes. Positivity, Ha! Once again, not today. And it’s not like Virgil is getting off light either. Let him howl away. I would rather stay with him than deal with anything out in the world, to be sure. But then how would we eat? How will we, Lunalesca?

I was on a roll after yesterday. I had to time travel through an entire week. Short of talking to you again. What a way to start the week after E-Day month. As the song goes, “Wake Me Up When September Ends.” It’s more like, “So wake me up when it’s all over. When I’m wiser, and I’m older.” It has yet to happen. Luna, time keeps rolling along. As I hope the car does. Long enough to get me to the dealership mechanic. And then what happens? I can see whatever cash I have. Coins rolling away from me. The bank vault wheel closes up on me. Because what business do I have with them anymore? Put on a happy face. I think not

Not when it’s so easy to roll it over into a frown. And speaking of rolling over. If you’re wondering what is taking me so long today to talk to you. Anything to feel good… I’m like a slug, Lady Lunalesca, slithering, slobbering, but I have not yet slimed… Eww. Being on my belly or going to fetch some lube. Wouldn’t that require some legwork? Lunalesca, did I say that out loud? Am I finding reasons to miss the car, the inspiration I need to pay for it today? Sigh…

In August, it was the fence. It’s still broken. This month, it was me. And I’m wrecked. To say the least. Facing October, it’s the car. “Keep rollin’, rollin’, rollin’, rollin’.” Let’s Roll Braxton… Virgil.

972 Days Without B III, Day 413 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 089 ~Paging Virgil, Knight Braxton~

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It wasn’t a big deal. I’d lay on the loveseat, and B would pick a spot and give me a look. “You good,” then he would listen to me, or if it was inappropriate, he’d fall asleep. Books and furry kids. Read all about it. “Paging Virgil, Knight Braxton.”

Thursday, September 28, 2023

Tale 089 ~Paging Virgil, Knight Braxton~

970 Days Without B III, Day 411 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Seeing as how we’re speaking on Sunday, September 24, 2023. You can guess my day

I wonder if I’ll make it to the couch today. And no, that’s not me being mean to Virgil Vivi, B. I was going to call him “the Freeloader.” Yeah, I need to stop that. I’m sorry. It’s not like I haven’t lain in our usual spot and read. “And it hurts like hell. Yeah, it hurts like hell,” sometimes, as the song goes. But today, I’ll be exhausted, lazy, or just plain stupid, B III. However, you would never say that. You wouldn’t say much, and if I couldn’t… books. That’s what I want to speak to you about. Don’t worry… (snickers) yeah right. Anyway, Triple B, I’m not banning books. Remember all the books I couldn’t read you. You’re a big boy now.

But I’m not. Seeing as how I’m still talking to my dead furry kid. That’s what THEY would say. And Virgil? He would prefer I get out of bed. The Dining room table isn’t helping. Considering all those long days I would spend writing, you would know all about that. Only we’re talking about reading. And I was looking at the Man In The Mirror. I spent all this morning listing off the books I was getting for cheap or even for free from people. Hometown Hero (The Breeder Book 1), Witch Girl Study Group: The Complete Series, Backyard Dungeon 2: A Reverse Portal Fantasy, and more. The year you died, 2021, I read about six. 2022 was nearly forty, if not more, Triple B.

2023 started off promising, but with Kindle Challenges, the series I started, and a need for more time. And I have a whole library waiting… What exactly am I asking for, Braxton? Um, well… I would have finished A People’s History of the Vampire Uprising: A Novel. If it weren’t for running out of time or reading stuff, that would have someone reading me Miranda Rights at some point. And I hate reading anything about the bank and cash, but reading about dead fur babies vs. beautiful women and everything buried rising. Would it matter to you what I read, Braxton? Asking permission? As long as we’re together and still breathing. Braxton, I’m still reeling from your broken record. 526 Days. Paging Virgil, Knight Braxton

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Tale 084 ~Virgil, We Gonna B~

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I didn’t know what to tell Braxton while he was dying. And I don’t know what to tell Virgil while he’s living. But they both sat in the same car seat, and I was trying to remember how to breathe. I was broke in more ways than one. Virgil, We Gonna B.

Saturday, September 23, 2023

Tale 084 ~Virgil, We Gonna B~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… Alright. Why do I tell myself this lie every morning? You don’t have to wake up.

So, is the night worse? Hell! Anytime I get to close my eyes, I consider it a win, Lady Lu. If anything, I need to count “my” blessings. I need to show gratitude this morning. There is money to spend this Saturday… Did I say that out loud for real? I mean, I did buy another audiobook. And since you know Lady Lunalesca, I won’t be finishing “A People’s History of the Vampire Uprising: A Novel.” Not today anyway, Lunalesca. There’s not a moment that goes by without bad news. I’ve got seven days to finish. Anyway, back to gratitude, AHEM. I’m keeping Imogen Linn in business reading about the Pessumae Christi. I’m learning new words like “Meretrix.” He who increases knowledge increases sorrow. Right…

No wonder Republicans would choose to stay STUPID and angry. And you know me, Lady Lunalesca. I’m always angry… and afraid. But I don’t want to be STUPID. Not ever. But where was I? Oh yeah. Blacked has their merchandise back in stock. What would M Anime think about that? And I’ve been going on for days about character customizations. As if I have time to worry about the book I was writing about Cherry… to a certain degree, Luna. I checked the Day Job schedule. I’m still broke, but with so many hours, Ha. Again, gratitude? How about that the fence hasn’t fallen? But who knows, it’s dark out. Braxton would be going crazy. Lunalesca, did you think I forgot about him? Virgil’s alright.

Oh, he’ll never be my son. That’s pretty harsh. More like both he and I will never be, B III. Did you see what I did there? It wasn’t much of nothing. I’ll never be much of nothing, even after this thirty-ninth “Exist Day.” Before that was M Anime’s thirty-fifth birthday. Yabbos? I meant to use the B-word, but you know how the critic gets. But I’ll always be obsessed with them. And whatever pair I’m blessed with seeing today while out and about, hmm. Broke, even more than now, is something I can expect as well. Shopping, existing, failing. Because B ain’t here. And how are we gonna be alright without my firstborn, Lunalesca? Breathing’s what I do. That’s existence. Virgil, We Gonna B

965 Days Without B III, Day 406 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 082 ~Virgil, Let’s Breakout, Braxton~

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I haven’t seen a Math class in years, but still hate it. And reading… That’s how bad it is. I read novels in Math. But if I read one more day, my record with B III on September 16, 2020, is broken. Broken already, but… Virgil, Let’s Breakout, Braxton

Thursday, September 21, 2023

Tale 082 ~Virgil, Let’s Breakout, Braxton~

963 Days Without B III, Day 404 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? You could be anywhere right now. Better than here? Daddy’s in the Special Hell. Still?

What? You rather I be mad than sad? And yes, B III, I have already cried over you once. It was for the stupidest reason. But I was mad as Hell when Virgil came close to vomiting all over the phone a few weeks ago. Only he was sick. And when you were the same, Braxton? I could be all sorts of mad at you now. You know me and my fondness for list B III. Braxton, today is Wednesday, September 20, 2023. But by the time you read this, it will have been 964 Days that I’ve had a broken heart. Even now, I want to yell at you, ha-ha. What about the bed I continue sitting in that’s collapsing? Depression and Humiliations galore.

Cherry would not be pleased about what amounts to a character study. And neither would an ex-beauty queen that did… certain movies. And what about writing my books, like I always promised? Because the last thing I want to do to today B is more reading. That’s what brings me here today. As you can see, my record for “Days in a row” on Wednesday is 525, soon to be 526. And there lies the problem. Thursday will be 527 Days. Braxton… I’m breaking “my” record. And in so doing, a part of you… is disappearing. It’s like a Mario Kart Time Trial, your ghost. Virgil’s been here 404 Days, Braxton. Breaking a record like this doesn’t mean much in the big scheme of things.

Hell! Braxton, when you died, I didn’t do anything… let’s say sinful for 161 Days. Counting today, I’m not even close to breaking that record at 54. Another reason I’m trying to talk to you instead of looking up Yabbos. But I did speak to your Aunt Carolina yesterday. Nothing can be that paradise, I would think. Although that would explain why you’re not breaking out of Heaven, Hell, or testing the Rainbow Bridge… I’m sure Virgil could use a break from my existing. He’s not so desperate today… Tomorrow? Triple B, you are your father’s son. You wanted to stay always and forever -trying to save me from breaking down in a broken world. I made “my” bed, this Hell. Virgil, Let’s Breakout, Braxton

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Tale 077 ~A W, V, Braxton~

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When first I saw Virgil, I heard Braxton’s “voice,” saying… I can’t make this more black and white, Dad, pick him up. And he made bosoms look nice the way he would cuddle Carolina’s. And then money or the lack thereof. Don’t I want “A W, V, Braxton?”

Saturday, September 16, 2023

Tale 077 ~A W, V, Braxton~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… sigh, and it’s still not enough. I want it all, and I want it right now.

Stupid, greedy, getting naughty in the dark… I promise you, Lady Lunalesca, I’m not joining the GOP. And yet… Well, I’m mad at what happened at the bank yesterday. Hmm. There are worse things. Braxton is not getting any deader. Wow! That’s pretty harsh. Right? And when’s the last time I heard from Braxton? This morning, I suppose. Sucker Punch. Lunalesca, I mean both the feeling and the song from the movie I Want It All/We Will Rock You Mashup. So what is it my son is trying to tell me, Lunalesca? I don’t know. Thirty-nine years of existence, and I’m still confused as all Hell. Or scared to death. Please! “It’s foolish to ask for luxuries in times like these.” Pop culture’s popping today.

Unlike other things… And Braxton wouldn’t want me that happy, like him with his toys. But in all the things I’ve read and listened to. I swear between Eric Vall’s Harem romances and Imogen Linn’s Erotica. I’m keeping them both in business. There are also vampires. Like I was telling Lady Sophia yesterday. I didn’t have time for that. Winning? Victory? Each book is just that, Lady Lunalesca. Whether I’m reading or writing. There’s no time. Hell! I told B all the time. Once I get this done… What, become a wealthy man? When I have a bunch of women in bed? Let’s have the world wrapped around my finger. But with love, aren’t you already winning? Is that what Braxton is trying to say?

I don’t know if I told you about the two days I had people buy me breakfast and lunch out of the blue. And as much as I hate both the Day Job and E-Day, I got free food, right? And now, yesterday, I see someone left their money in the cash tray at the ATM, and I… don’t take it? Doesn’t money make me happy? Bosoms, Yabbos, Gazongas, Lunalesca. On more than one occasion… Braxton found his happiness cuddling with hers during movies. Sigh. Only I’m never happy. I couldn’t tell you what I am today, Lunalesca, besides exhausted. Only those fur baby books tell me our children would want us to be happy, to get those wins and victories. A W, V, Braxton

958 Days Without B III, Day 399 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 075 ~Virgil Pretends To B~

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If I can “see” ghosts, maybe V can too. Anytime I have to go out and pretend to be a good person, it sounds like a haunted house as I close the door. So besides writing, sleeping, or gazing at yabbos, I pretend it will be better. Virgil Pretends To B

Thursday, September 14, 2023

Tale 075 ~Virgil Pretends To B~

956 Days Without B III, Day 397 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? More to the point. Are you happy? I read up on The Rainbow Bridge, sometimes.

It’s supposed to be a happy place. And more than anything, B, I want you to be a happy puppy. Hell! You were fifteen when you left, and I still considered you my little puppy. You’d be eighteen now. Even after your “passing,” I still call you for “medicine time.” How’s that for ACCEPTANCE? Your Dad could use some type of medication, I guess, B. Is it the fact that I’m calling out to the dead? Well, only you. But yeah, I have that book on vampires. It could be all the bugs biting as I clean up your yard like you would be proud. It’s all “The Land of Make Believe,” Braxton. But Hell is far too real. Which is why I’m writing today.

Yeah, your Daddy is time-traveling, but only a day. It’s Wednesday, September 13, 2023. And before I get started on why I’m talking to you so late. It’s around 4:30 p.m., and I’m in bed. Of course, sigh. V’s laying here pretending being here’s his “Welcome to the good life.” Like father, like freeloader. I swear, Braxton, one day I’ll stop calling him that. Lying? Daddy was never one for acting but, strangely enough, for ACCEPTANCE. Now, after E-Day, with me being another year older. I swear thirty-nine sucks. Thirty-eight, thirty-seven, thirty-six. Thirty-six was an awful year. Oh! I should have died at “Seventeen,” Braxton. But I keep pretending, don’t I? That bullying lie of It Gets Better. It doesn’t. Nothing stops. Nothing. Well, you…

Only I keep going like I was today. Do I want to talk about the Day Job now or yesterday? What about what I did after? All the time in the world, and besides eating and sleeping, what did I do with it? I was like you when your Aunt Carolina came through —buried in Yabbos. Only for me, it was Cherry’s. As if I could recreate that beauty like something out of “The Truman Show.” And speaking of big racks, there was also Momokun. After a couple of downloads, um… Your Dad is not a good man. And I don’t do well at acting. Well, “When we pretend that we’re dead,” you have me beat. Teach Virgil to be happy. Virgil Pretends To B.

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Tale 070 ~Virgil, BIII Of E-Day~

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Any day B III got more than his fair share, he considered it a holiday. Birthdays? His own, and then E-Day. I didn’t share with VV… Red Lobster forgot the fries “twice.” And the steak. It’s not the only reason I want to vomit. “Virgil, BIII Of E-Day”

Saturday, September 9, 2023

Tale 070 ~Virgil, BIII Of E-Day~

Hey Lady Lu,
I AM a Billionaire right now… Which means I would be “partying” this month. To be honest. I just want to vomit.

Didn’t I say yesterday that I’m pretty sober? Unless you count sugar as substance abuse. I don’t know if I’ve been crashing. The “Adrenaline” is wearing off. Or depression’s back. I survived E-Day. But that means I have another year of existence to waste. Vomiting? Yep, Luna, TMI! But I’ve said out loud that I killed my son, too. Can B III see me now? Lunalesca, I hope not. But for the record, I’m sitting in bed talking to you. Talk about existence goals. I want to be in bed with a big set of boo… I’m not trying to be derogatory towards women. My critic would have a field day or say nothing at all. There is no middle ground. Anyway, sitting with Braxton…

I’d lie in bed all the time. And after napping for far too long, I’d spill my guts. Not literally. It depends on how you take these words. I wish I could tell you, but (censorship). Anyway, back to my point. Anything else requires me to face the “Man in the Mirror.” Lunalesca, the E in Existence. I swear if my critic doesn’t talk to me today… Emergence is what I regret the most. Extinction is what I yearn for. But Existence? And it’s been two days. What have I done with them? I’ve done the Math. E-Day takes plenty of arithmetic. The money I didn’t spend on “The Pic Phenomenon.” The cash wasted on “my” dinner. And let’s not forget time. THEY say, “Time Is Money.” Thirty-nine years, Lunalesca!

Let me spend more time answering my critic’s question. Hopefully… What’s E-Day? E-Day is the day on which… Well, as Shakespeare put it. From my mother’s womb, I was untimely ripped. It’s the day I came into this world kicking and screaming. And look at me now. Can’t you see Lady Lunalesca? It’s why I find women distracting, love B’s eyes and avoid mirrors. Didn’t I mention I’m reading about vampires now? What are the rules for them again? The rules for E-Day are getting a good night’s sleep, not seeing people, and having a delicious dinner. And I broke every single one this week. And I’m glad it’s over, but now there’s more time. What does that mean for Virgil? Virgil, BIII Of E-Day

951 Days Without B III, Day 392 of Virgil’s Arrival

BLM Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Tale 068 ~Mourning Braxton, Virgil, E-Day~

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Welcome to Level 39! Welcome to E-Day. It’s still the 6th, and the day is a waste. 14244 days of worthlessness. There were 15 years with the greatest guy ever. My son. And 39 years of living in terror of a few people… Mourning Braxton, Virgil, E-Day.

Thursday, September 7, 2023

Tale 068 ~Mourning Braxton, Virgil, E-Day~

949 Days Without B III, Day 390 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Welcome to Level 39. I think I’m going to be sick. Dead? Just Survive Somehow.

In the next few minutes… I could be joining you. I’m time-traveling as today is Wednesday, September 6, 2023; current time is 2:48 PM. Your granddaddy said he’ll be here at 3:00. I would trade places with you in a heartbeat, Braxton. How many more, hmm? The person I am right this second will change between his arrival and departure, Braxton. I said the same thing about you on many different occasions. But the one I’m thinking about right this second… I didn’t burst into tears at the Day Job for nothing. I needed the pain of losing you to negate the pain of losing myself. The Horror, the Horror awaits. We’re T-Minus 5 minutes. I thought midnight would be the worst, but your Gramps.

But let’s say I survive this moment. Braxton, he’s 3 minutes away, running late, whatever.

Yeah, whatever. This afternoon, I’m going to hop in the shower… I remember you hated me doing that. We are creatures of routine. And an evening shower meant… the movies. As in, I’m leaving you. There were your Aunt’s mammaries, which you loved so much. There was that time with the maid, Special K. Or there was more work from the Day Job. Must I make a big deal out of everything, even a shower? Braxton, please help me! Anyway, tomorrow, I won’t set any alarms. I’ll wake up when I’m good and ready. Braxton, should I order something for breakfast and lunch? Take care of Virgil, of course, duh!

Another thing for this afternoon. I should take care of all my criminality. Just saying. Don’t I always say I don’t have time to work on your albums? But somehow, I’ll find the time to work on some… anyway, The Pic Phenomenon. I’d never do that when you were around. And VV? He runs on fear and Adrenaline like me. Like father, like freeloader, ha. Stop! I hear ya, B III, I do. I wish I could stop this fear right now. And today, Braxton. Today, there’s a good night’s sleep, some good food, and Simoleons in my pocket, funny. It’s now 3:29. Your Gramps isn’t here yet. E-Day is coming for me. My E-Day wish is… that we are together. Mourning Braxton, Virgil, E-Day

Always and Forever,
Your Dad