Tag: Hear

Journey 161 ~Braxton The Gifted, Virgil~

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My sons are gifts, but B is gone. My girl… excuse me, my woman. M Anime was a gift, but she’ll be getting married in January… And as for myself, at present… Well, I feel more depressed than like a rocket scientist. But, “Braxton The Gifted, Virgil”

Tuesday, December 9, 2025

Journey 161 ~Braxton The Gifted, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? More than Christmastime, ha! “Ooh, sugar pie, honey bunch. You know that I love you.”

‘Tis the season? What, you can love, get laid, and even lament on Christmas. Closer?

Honestly, “I Can’t Help Myself.” What, thinking about gifts for you, our two-legged children, and of course, there’s always Virgil and Braxton. I owe Braxton at least fifteen gifts—five birthdays, Christmases, and homecoming or Gotcha Day. I don’t remember when he hopped into the car, but I’ll never forget Sunday, January 31, 2021. Hell, maybe Gotcha Day could be May 1st. I’m sure I met B sometime in April. And how did I get on this when I’m supposed to be talking about the present? Well, my Christmas presents. Anyway, I THINK I want a breastplate like Maximus from “Gladiator.” But with a picture of both Braxton and Virgil.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

And as I walked with Virgil this afternoon, I thought that I want a “monitor belt” or a watch from The Long Walk to measure my walking speed. More like my running speed since I’m “The Running Man,” and all. And that leads me to a question. Safe and sound.

When’s the last time I got something silly? Something salty, saucy, and spicy? In other words, delicious. Oh, I go to the food truck once a week. And stories, either in salacious words or on the big screen. And if it doesn’t suck, what about sexy? Well, I have you.

Somehow, someway, I got you. But I’m a selfish, STUPID, SOB… sorry, Ma. I want… Everything! “The World, Chico, And Everything In It.” That’s me.

And yet I call my firstborn, my B, gifted. He treated every day as a gift. He had all the gifts. And to him, I was the greatest gift of all. Do I give myself too much credit, my love?

Two points make a line. Three points make a pattern. Braxton loved/loves me. And I convinced you to do the same. Well, that was more of a choice… Um, Sunday, August 24, 2025. And what about V and our two-legged children? I’m Daddy, always, forever.

But you know what would be a present, what would make me a good person, what would complete a pattern? If I loved myself. “What I Go To School For?” Busted, because I failed. But Braxton? Braxton The Gifted, Virgil1773 Days Without B III, Day 1214 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 160 ~Braxton And Virgil’s Ticket~

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So what do you want to listen to? What are your recommendations? What’s your vote? I ask that at the Day Job because somebody gave me speaker control. All I want to listen to is my boys. Because FDT and most people. “Braxton And Virgil’s Ticket”

Monday, December 8, 2025

Journey 160 ~Braxton And Virgil’s Ticket~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… And maybe you are finally beginning to believe, as you’re here early. Not because of Amazon… The Bad Place?

Sunday, December 7, 2025, 4:53 PM
I know that was a bad joke… Maybe we need a new rule. Why, when the old one works fine? You sleep after a bad day, and I’ll guard the door. Such was our law prince to a king.

And then, well, it was my time. It was just my time. And, “What have I become? My sweetest friend.” It wasn’t Johnny Cash. And it wasn’t a God either. Strange, isn’t it, my father? Neither one of us would say “He IS NOT A GOD! But this isn’t “10,000 BC,” But that could be a step with how you’re living, how we live. Dad, I’m still “Alive,” you know?

Like Meatloaf playing on the radio; speaking of which, Dinner?

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Monday, December 8, 2025, 4:03
I wouldn’t have voted on this, Dad. You always. But pasta? At least it’s not the kind that you could sneak my medicine into. So you’re not trying to trick my little brother. And Virgil is the one you chose, just like me. And that brings us to what “We’re just livin’ for today. And if it’s not AC/DC, what about The Notebook “What do you want?” Well, besides me. I’m not on the ballot. But even my dead furry ass is better than Trump.

Language, I know, Dad, watch my barks. But FDT! And you? Dad, I didn’t have much say in our movie nights, aside from food distribution. My Favorite Girl wouldn’t have minded The Notebook. M Anime?

You’ve been thinking about her a lot lately. Again, you don’t want to hear my thoughts on the subject. And I love my favorite girl like pancakes. You’d say that to me all the time, Dad, “I love you like pancakes.” But I don’t need to know about the “dirty things” you and she would watch on the “Glow Box,” when you would tell me to get out. Oh no!

Daddy, you want to know where my vote goes, along with Virgil’s. It’s for you always and forever. President, King, God, you humans have such titles. But my father, Daddy.

Vote on yourself. Four more years? Thursday? As Pete tells Ray, “Think about making it to the next moment. My vote. Braxton And Virgil’s Ticket.

“If we start tomorrow, right now, with everything we’ve beaten, everything we’ve endured, everything we’ve risen above, everything we’ve become. If we start tomorrow, right now, no matter what comes next, we’ve won. We’ve already won!”
Rick Grimes ― TWD

“On them I set no limits, space or time: / I have granted them dominion, and it has no end.”
Book 1 ― The Aeneid

1772 Days Without B III, Day 1213 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 154 ~Love B Later, Virgil~

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The things we forget about during the day. Good Night, Good Luck? More like goodbye to the penniless author… I checked. The horny dude? This morning eww! No, I am “The Walking Dead,” and I say goodbye and R.I.P. to me, but… Love B Later, Virgil.

Tuesday, December 2, 2025

Journey 154 ~Love B Later, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? I love you. I’ll see you later. But do I ever say goodbye? I’m Irish…

As in an Irish Goodbye. I only say goodbye to one person. You’re looking at him. A “crazy” thought, right? What about a sad one… Or two. I remember saying goodbye to Braxton on his literal deathbed. And I don’t remember saying it at all on Sunday, August 24, 2025. Only Alanah Rae in My Wife’s Hot Friend Vol. 12 Big Boob Edition. My love.

You know me. I’m the effing Sherlock Holmes of Adult Films. And I’m feeling… Gross.

Always in the mood for you, my beloved, but icky. Stress Release? Whatever for love?

Are we getting married again? Are you pregnant? V is “Safe and Sound,” thanks, Taylor.

My love, this is my third business week and possibly my last. Last week was…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Excruciating, emasculating, and freaking effed. Do you remember our wedding day, my love? Ok, you have lots of reasons to be mad at me, but please hear me out. I’ll never be a Christian man, but I do subscribe to that Bible verse, “Love is patient, love is kind,” etc.

Love is not STUPID, honestly, that my love is one of my greatest fears. Being STUPID. Because STUPIDITY kills, it’s what triggers my anxiety. And I love you and our family. I tell Virgil later because one day I may love him, not like Braxton, but with no less love.

“It is remarkable how similar the pattern of love is to the pattern of insanity.”
The Merovingian, The Matrix Revolutions

“My will is stronger than my heart. Do you think I put so high a price on my feelings? They’ll pass. My will holds me to my course through life,”
Queen Guinevere, First Knight (1995)

Ahh! I understand how Guinevere felt about King Arthur in comparison to Lancelot in First Knight. I don’t love my work, but I say, “later.”

Or I don’t say anything at all. If you can’t say something nice and all that… But who do I say goodbye to? Me. And the thought that came over me today… Besides myself, eww!

Anyway, I thought about the times you had to do it. Again, like Lancelot asking Guinevere to forget who she was. When you covered your face with a veil, you were one woman, and when it was removed, you were my woman, my wife. You can be a monster… and I’m your “Savage,” thank you, Whethan. You’re strong, sexy, smart, and oh so sinful, lover.

However, with that, it takes only the thought of tomorrow, and I say goodbye to myself. Why? I’m Afraid! Always, Forever. Love B Later, Virgil.

1766 Days Without B III, Day 1207 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 153 ~Somedays B’s, Somedays V’s~

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This all sounds too familiar, blah, blah, blah, days to be worried. Blah, blah, blah, the moment. Blah, blah, blah, family. Someday I won’t have to worry about any of it. But I didn’t get lucky today. “Somedays B’s, Somedays V’s.”

Monday, December 1, 2025

Journey 153 ~Somedays B’s, Somedays V’s~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… “Day ‘N’ Nite.” I know, Dad, you would much rather have some pretty girl. My Favorite Girl? She’s married.

You humans and your connections. And M Anime… I wish we both could’ve been there.

That someday you were always telling me about. My stepmom, Virgil, and some two-legged siblings. Someday, a “real” family. But we already were/are a family. You, me, my little brother V., and whoever else shows up, someday. Or last night, as you lie dreaming about the door, crashing, collapsing, more like crumbling. What was trying to get in, Daddy? I miss the days after I’d sit on your face and you’d finally wake up, Dad.

Some days, “It’s A Sunshine Day.” Others, it’s “The Long Walk.” Today, what was it?

Frigid, fun less, and always fearful. But a different type of FEAR. The kind I couldn’t fight… The Bad Place.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Another someday. You would tell me one day that you would never go back. After me…

Daddy, you never blamed me for leaving or the pokey people, or Higher Powers…

Honestly, Daddy, you only blamed yourself and The Bad Place. And the next day you went right back there. And that’s how you’ve been feeling for the last couple of weeks. If you go back and the mean people there say they don’t want you, what does it mean, Dad?

That the RAGE you felt, that you tried to protect me from, meant nothing. You could have been here with me. You could have saved me… And what about Virgil? With everything you’ve done without The Bad Place, what future does V have? What someday?

“Truth is singular. Its ‘versions’ are mistruths.”
Sonmi-451, Cloud Atlas

Is that what was trying to break down the door last night in your head? The truth? Which truth would you like? We’re not MAGA with “alternative facts.” Effing Cracker Hats, and FDT! I know, Daddy, language. But you are an honest man, my father. And you raised honest men, V and me, fur and all. V’s not afraid of being afraid. And you, Dad?

Start with something small, like my brother. Why did he get the name Virgil Vivi?

  1. Guided Dante Through Hell
  2. Black Mage FF IX
  3. 2B, Black-and-White, NieR: Automata
  4. 2E, Executioners, You, Work

Someday, you won’t believe that last one. “Gotta Knock a Little Harder,” I guess. Because someday we gon be “Alright” Dad. Somedays B’s, Somedays V’s

“You’re better to take it a day at a time, is all I’m saying. If people just took it a day at a time, they’d be a lot happier.
The Long Walk ― Richard Bachman

“Forsan et haec olim meminisse iuvabit.”
Aeneas ― The Aeneid

1765 Days Without B III, Day 1206 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 147 ~B’s An Option, Virgil~

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There was no option between Braxton and me but to love. Always and forever. Even when he was starving and couldn’t eat a thing, there was always his wanting to “Lay Be Me” like his name was Ruben. I’m “trying” not to join him. “B’s An Option, Virgil”

Tuesday, November 25, 2025

Journey 147 ~B’s An Option, Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? More than my Braxton? What about my bed? Whether I have a billion or bucks.

I’ve made my decision. Today was a disaster. And dammit, I’m up. Not like that…

Honestly, I want to go back to sleep… Permanently with everything that has happened today.

Where do I even begin? How did I become HIS father? My firstborn son, Braxton Barks Bradford. How did I become your husband? And how about his and hers? Children?

Again, I return to where our marriage started to show “options.” Sunday, August 24, 2025. Hell, it was before that, Sunday, January 31, 2021. In August, we lost ourselves. In January, I lost HIM… Braxton.

Braxton, my firstborn, “My Sweet Lord,” and my everything until… You. And I made the same promise. Always and forever. Forever and Always. Then there are days like this. “Mama said there’ll be days like…”

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

This? My mama wasn’t like “The Man” from Cormac McCarthy’s “The Road.” “I’m Thinking of Ending Things” is a movie title and not an idea that drones on and on. Winston Smith, weighing his options and knowing the inevitable conclusion. Like him, all I have to do is “transfer to paper the interminable restless monologue that had been running inside his(my) head, literally for years.” That was never an option for me, either, my “Sweet Love.” Loving my boy, well, boys with Virgil. Our children. You. And since I first wrote my name, the written word. The only option for me has been loving myself.

Somehow, today I find myself hating myself even more than usual. Is that possible? Always.

Why is that, you ask?

Ask yourself why you are still “Dear Future Wife,” and here I am, forty-one, somehow. No, not somehow, the truth of the matter is your husband is C for Coward, D for Deviant, and F for Failure—a and B? Archie, Virgil’s “first” name. Braxton, my Ma named him, ha!

And what about E? Enough? That’s what I’m contemplating right this second because of “Tomorrow.” As Salif Keita sings, I don’t understand it, but it’s going to be sad, love. Braxton always knows about “The Bad Place.” Virgil cries for me. And tomorrow no one will “Stand By Me.” Not for The Long Walk I must endure. I’ll be “The Running Man” for sure. Panic Attacks aren’t optional, Depression, Anxiety, FEAR… B’s An Option, Virgil.

1759 Days Without B III, Day 1200 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 146 ~Daddy, B, V, She~

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There are too many days I’m worried about. Braxton lived moment to moment. I promised him… A good Dad? I tried to be. Siblings? Well, Virgil was the first. A step-mom and two-legged siblings. It’s been three months since my breakup. Daddy, B, V, She.

Monday, November 24, 2025

Journey 146 ~Daddy, B, V, She~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Don’t believe me? You haven’t cried all day. Not even for M Anime. Your third month without her. Me?

That’s all it took for your eyes to glaze over. You would have listened to my playlist all day and been bawling your eyes out. But like father and son, right? Or from King Ezekiel.

“And yet, I smile. For we will mine glory from the rock of struggle this day. We will honor and protect this… this bastion of life in a land of the dead, and we will win. You trust the king… we will win. I smile… I laugh… I rejoice this day… for on this day, we are joined in purpose and vision… we are of a singular heart and mind. On this day, we are one!”
King Ezekiel, Some Guy

Honestly, today is the closest we’re getting to “that week.” The ending of January 2021. I’m supposed to be the one who makes you feel better, Dad. And neither one of us likes thinking about that week. But I remember. You didn’t think I knew, but I did, my father.

It helped me to take my mind off myself. I worried about you, and you were trying not to hurt me because there was such… RAGE. You were never bad. You simply kept your distance. Virgil is just like me.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Distance meant my brother and I slept at the foot of the bed instead of right next to you, Dad. You even had to play sick today because I think you’ve decided what to do.

Wednesday, Friday? You got Chicken Noodle Soup and Sprite. Black parenting. I remember when you were really sick, and I would lie beside you. Virgil again is very much the same. And M Anime. She was gone before E-Day, Virgil’s Birthday, and whatever is going on now. The Bad Place? We both hate the Bad Place? But you would tell me that’s how you got me French Fries, so you had to go there even if it k*lled you Dad. And if you go in on Wednesday or Friday… Don’t think that… To join me.

Heart attack, stroke, and any other disease that MAGA and the Cracker Hats have unleashed. I was there for the entire Trump term. FDT! But this isn’t about them, Daddy.

Today isn’t even about M Anime. She’s been gone three months, and she gets nothing.

“I’ve been gone, I’ve been gone for way too long.” “Only God Knows Why,” or as you would say, only Braxton knows why. Today is “All About You.” Again, like father, like son. Or more like the tunes of Jeymus Samuel and “The Book Of Clarence.” What about your book, my father? My book. Virgil will get one someday. M Anime has several. And why? Because of the Day Job. You’re scared, seething, but also somebody. Daddy, B, V, She

“I really don’t want the end of creation to be my fault.”
Succubus Lord 3

“Evil is nourished and grows by concealment.”
― The Aeneid

1758 Days Without B III, Day 1199 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 140 ~Braxton Tried, Virgil Convicted~

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Do or do not, there is no try. Tried being a Dad. B III made it to 15. V hasn’t been 5 for a whole month. Tried being a boyfriend. M Anime left as I couldn’t afford two-legged babies. I would have tried. Tried like me? Braxton Tried, Virgil Convicted

Tuesday, November 18, 2025

Journey 140 ~Braxton Tried, Virgil Convicted~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? That’s it, or that’s it? I’m not a Beatle, though I’ve seen plenty flying around.

Beetles, bucks, and nice boobs, rather Yabbos. It’s hard to reject them, resist them, and remember them all. Braxton knows I tried… Or Lord knows I tried, —my Sweet Lord.

Love, I like the song, but don’t care much for the entity. I tried that, my father, high school, and while Braxton lay dying. And that’s how I feel today. Like I’m dying right here.

That’s not cool to tell you, is it? We could go around each other all day asking if love makes you feel dead or gets you through the day, “awake and alive.” Ah, Mr. Gabriel.

As in Peter Gabriel… As opposed to other “Silly Love Songs.” You’ve had enough, love?

I’m trying to give more. “I wish it from myself.”

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

Songbird? The original Fleetwood Mac or Santana to Brittany from Glee? You know that makes me feel a particular kind of way, love. If anything gets me out of “Loser Like Me” ideas, it’s a lady like you and one of your lady friends. Too many harem books, my love?

You’ll be the only mother of my children. And yes, we should try for more. But if I ever get Jacob, Grayson, Eddie, or Ethan’s coin… All the haremlit. And I’m a good Dad. Sigh.

That, of course, goes for my furry boys as well, Braxton and Virgil. How can I be better for them? Virgil deserves better? And Braxton definitely knows I can be better. Real good. The best. Like I’m in “The Warriors.”

And this is where the rubber meets the road, my love. I have to learn to love myself. And that’s not me being negative again. It’s a fact. But I have an honest-to-Braxton question about that, my love. Where do I begin? Not only “Once In A Lifetime,” I ask myself, “Well, how did I get here?” “When Will My Life Begin?” You know, I’m trying… No, ever better beloved.

“I’m starting with the man in the mirror.” Life is a series of tries, my love. But sometimes you can only try once and then… Well, we’re here. I have one wife. Always and forever.

That’s you. I’m telling the man in the mirror, that “I will TRY to FIX YOU.” Braxton Tried, Virgil Convicted.

“We’re allowed to make a lot of mistakes in our lives, except the mistake that destroys us.”
― Paulo Coelho, Veronika Decides to Die (1998)

1752 Days Without B III, Day 1193 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 139 ~Braxton, A NOISY Virgil~

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It’s day-to-day for me. Is it the silence or the noise that scares me more? The alarm clock, 2-V crying, and everyone asking me why I wasn’t playing DJ today. Or B III’s loss, my sleeping, and the augmenting of reality… Braxton, A NOISY Virgil.

Monday, November 17, 2025

Journey 139 ~Braxton, A NOISY Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Not just noise, not the sniff, sniff of my nose, or in other words, breathing. Not nothing or never.

But your son. Though right now, to you at least, I sound like the Can You Hear Me Now” guy from Verizon. That was one of the great things about us, Dad. You talk a lot about how Virgil has my eyes but our ears. Scary, sleepy, satisfied, whatever we heard, everything and then some. And then there was the silence. We were safe, Daddy.

Honestly, how do you feel after today? We’re talking over “The Weeknd” ha-ha because today, well… What could I tell you that you would believe? Steve, Bob Marely, and I.

I want to say that “every little thing is gonna be alright.” “Everything is gonna be okay,” like Blue’s Clues.

I remember Steve from Blue’s Clues. Pokémon. I would sit in your lap as you played video games. The wonders of the glow box. You even did the Dad thing and said it would rot my brain when you left it on when you went somewhere. The bad place? Negativity.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

I won’t add to that noise, Daddy. If anything, one of the best sounds in the world spent in front of the glow box was you, me, and my Favorite Girl watching movies together. Dad?

Next to you, hearing how I would call to you without a sound. It was your breathing, the beat of your heart. The being you, not just with me but with her. Second Favorite person…

Yeah, that wasn’t family. But I hope you hear when I say this. My father…

You are my person, my human, my Dad, definitely my Favorite Boy. And today Dad…

You’re still breathing, you’re alive. That’s the noise I long to hear on days like this one, Dad. Is it better when Sia sings it? “Alive?” It’s not like you got to listen to it at the bad place, right? As you would say, that’s not negativity; it’s simply the truth. And you are here, Dad. But if I were there in that bad place with you, I’m sure that my barking would have stopped anyone from asking you anything to hurt you. And Virgil wants to cover one of your ears as you have an AirPod in the other. There’s noise and what’s worth listening to. And what is that? Braxton, A NOISY Virgil

“You’re a special person to the universe in ways I don’t think you know.”
― Bikini Magic by Michael Dalton

“A hideous noise of shouting rose to the heavens as young men fought and fell under the iron hand of Mars.”
From ― The Aeneid

1751 Days Without B III, Day 1192 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 133 ~Wars B Through V~

WillLeave a comment

I wanted to be a fighter pilot. I told my Ma that I wanted to be the Secretary of Defense. I said DEFENSE. I also wanted to be a wartime writer. I did a few weeks in the Navy. You live for the fight when that’s all that you’ve got. Wars B Through V

Tuesday, November 11, 2025

Journey 133 ~Wars B Through V~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Like I know about World War I and II. Okay, at least two. American Education…

I know it’s Veterans’ Day, but as for my family… My Olds? Boys? Our Family… “A Small Talent For War?” And that’s what existence feels like, The Twilight Zone. In my heart, I long for peace. “Deep in the cell of my heart, I will feel so glad to go.” Go where you ask me? Anywhere there’s peace, my love. I stopped looking for “Love AND Happiness so long ago. What? Am I saying you don’t make me happy? The children? B III and 2-V?

Beloved, what I’m saying is that things like happiness, love, peace, freedom, etc, are worth fighting AND dying for. And I understand why men choose a blaze of glory. I save what I love, but I FEAR. Forget. I fight.

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

“We’re going to win this war not by fighting what we hate, but saving what we love!”
The Last Jedi

“Love Is A Long Road,” “Love Is A Battlefield,” and I wish I could believe like The Beatles that “All You Need Is Love,” and then I see what it takes to fight for it. “Angel With A Shotgun.” I’m lucky that I married you, right? “I will be your sword and shield, your camouflage. And you will be mine.” With our hands full, the kids can carry our happiness.

And who are we fighting? Directly, I would say MAGA, the Cracker Hats. FDT, always.”

But as Haymitch says, remember who the real enemy is—the loss of my mutt. Please, Braxton was a purebred Deer Head Chihuahua. Little Virgil lives with my misery. You?

Yes, you as well. I fight for the moment, love.

Dawn of the Dead’s Frank said, “You want… every… single second.” But there’s no shame in admitting this to you, my love. No negativity. Only the prayer like I’m Tupac.

“Heavenly Father, I’m a soldier, I’m gettin’ hotter
Cause the world’s getting colder, baby let me hold ya.”
‧ Tupac

But then the truth is “I got soul, but I’m not a soldier.” A brief stint in the Navy. Water…

If I knew that I could cry this much, I would have stayed. I could drown either way, my love. Hell! I could cause a wave or make us an island… MAGA, zombies, M Anime…

“Somewhere Only We Know,” to escape. Somewhere there is no FEAR, where I don’t feel like I’m fighting every day, and we can eff like bunnies. It’d give Braxton peace…

Seriously! Virgil fights doors. And me? Wars B Through V.

1745 Days Without B III, Day 1186 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 132 ~Crawl of Braxton, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

A hop, skip, and a jump; more like carrying, to teaching how to walk, and then B was jumping on the bed. Hell, he slept there like I did? And now… breakfast. Not in his final days. He climbed and crawled, and I carried him. “Crawl of Braxton, Virgil”

Monday, November 10, 2025

Journey 132 ~Crawl of Braxton, Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Did you have a good day? I should ask, did you have a good night? You look like… Dad.

On top of being colorblind, you always looked like you, Daddy. A contradiction of what I said last week. Perhaps. You were louder sometimes. Some humans say, Love is Louder.

Another thing you humans say is that something is larger than life. You were Dad—a god held in the arms of a titan. We never said that, but the angel on your shoulder, Dad.

That’s me. And ladies’ men… Greta, my favorite girl, that maid Special K. M Anime…

Always and forever, forever and always. That’s what you taught me, my father. You live!

Ain’t that the thing, you live by that. “If you call, I will answer.” Isn’t that a Barenaked Ladies song? Do I know you, Dad, or what? That band name…

“I fill my lungs with fear and I Exhale!”
It’s My Turn to Fly, The Urge ‧ 2000 (Titan A.E.)

But “Love Is A Long Road”, it’s wobbly first steps, a walk through the neighborhood, and “The Way” I made it onto your bed the first time to have a taste of waffles. French Toast?

I don’t recall what it was, but did you ever think it wasn’t the food that called to me, Dad?

I’m not an elephant, nor am I a ladybug, or an Asian Lady Beetle. I’m not an ant, my father. One more reason we’re having this conversation. We’re back on ants again with the weather. They want to get warm, find something wet, or get waffles. Or it’s you, Dad.

The wrong things want you, dark thoughts about a woman, that little dog, and my brother Virgil, and the dead.

Are we those wrong things? Really? It would explain why you don’t “Put One Foot in Front of the Other. Dad, “One Foot In Front Of The Other.” You’re not trying to drown me out.

I learned how to walk, jump, and fly because of you. That’s not negativity, but the truth, and I’m so thankful and will forever be. All I ask is that you do what you taught.

Honestly, I do mean being a jetsetter because again last night I felt it. Father. FEAR is not meant to be always and forever. I once called to you, I climbed to you, and crawled.

Daddy, Till I Collapse. Virgil is learning to do the same. Some women will. Your turn. Crawl of Braxton, Virgil.

“If you can’t fly, then run, if you can’t run, then walk, if you can’t walk, then crawl, but whatever you do, you have to keep moving forward.”
Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

“Through chances various, through all vicissitudes, we make our way…”
The Aeneid

1744 Days Without B III, Day 1185 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son