Journey 224 ~B’s House Party Virgil~

Didn’t I say something about “Bloom” canned energy last week? I didn’t need an energy shot today. Not like I could afford it after a fake STUPID Bowl party Sunday. And today, five years ago, my B came or went home… Whatever. “B’s House Party Virgil”

Tuesday, February 10, 2026

Journey 224 ~B’s House Party Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? Love and Marriage. But I’m trying, baby doll, to be one for Love and Happiness.

So “happy” in fact that I almost forgot what day it was. The things I think about as “I watch my youngest son and it helps to pass the time.” Really? Kid Rock, today? Eff!

Seriously, the guy’s STUPID. But then again, I’m the one looking up how many pallbearers are needed. When I carried my firstborn son, my B III, out of PetSmart… Eff!

There was a box in a little blue bag from “Pet Angel.” And some of his ashes are in a pendant that I wear even now. Always and forever. Well, since Wednesday, February 10, 2021. And here my Braxton remains. As I brought Virgil in from our walk today, I thought, “Our house is a very, very, very fine house.”

Braxton and I. What about his little brother? What about our two-legged brood, my “Sweet Love.” I’m sure your boobs/Yabbos had much to do with that. More like my “Salty Chocolate Balls.” What? Would you rather have me crying for the rest of the day?

Honestly, I don’t think I have cried for Braxton today. “A House Is Not a Home” without him…? Am I daring to question that? Wait, aren’t we supposed to be talking about your big uns? Sure, but as much as I love them. Hell, I’m in love with the “Shape of You.” “All of Me” loves all of you. But why am I not “Dancing In The Street?” I’m discombobulated.

“I Feel Everything.” Can I feel the radio dial, hmm?

I wish I had earlier, but now, I feel like I failed a Math class sophomore or junior year, got jailed that ONE time, left Navy basic training, worried about me while B lay dying, failed him, and carried him out in a bag all rolled into one. And is there more, my baby girl?

With everything, I’m hot, hard, and horny. And I want my balls between your boobs.

Being an effing husband, can I not say I want to slam my balls home inside my very lovely wife? When the house is a rockin’, don’t come a knockin’. But today my dearest heart…

Ain’t Nobody Got Time For That. I should mourn, grieve, and throw my pity party. Always… B’s House Party Virgil

“It’s a celebration, and everyone should invite me.”
Number One Spot
— Song by Ludacris

1836 Days Without B III, Day 1277 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 223 ~Braxton’s Verity Vacation Virgil~

Didn’t I say last week I didn’t feel like partying? So, last night? I’d watched a game I cared nothing about, bought food I couldn’t afford. Let V eat his heart out. And stared at the ceiling for hours. Upper room? “Braxton’s Verity Vacation Virgil.”

Monday, February 9, 2026

Journey 223 ~Braxton’s Verity Vacation Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Did you have a good day? A good night anyway. A full belly, an open heart (compared to MAGA)

And while Heaven is as good at its open-door policy as you were. I’ve never been so tempted not to go “Knockin’ On Heaven’s Door.” Not that I ever did in the first place, Dad.

“Diggin’” at you? Of course not, that’s why I used the “Cowboy Bebop” movie… Sorry.

But I can’t help being a bit jealous of you and Virgil after last night. My little brother deserved everything, no doubt. Street Tacos, Ranch Wings with the wild sauce from Buffalo Wild Wings, Fries for him, and Onion Rings for you. Do you remember when my Favorite Girl warned you about Onions? She had to ruin my fun. But “Here I Am” Dad pawing and thinking, I “Gotta Knock a Little Harder.” I’m trying.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Don’t worry, my father, I’ve eaten. The question is “Have you eaten yet?” I’m sure we’ve had Panda Express, but the glow box has been particularly annoying with those commercials, the STUPID Bowl, as you call it. And of all the colors I was introduced to on the Rainbow Bridge, orange is not my favorite color: Mother Effer’s orange, Daddy.

Yes, I know, Language! But I was here the first time that… Human… No, he’s not. Nothing like you, Dad, or any other human. Only I was with you the whole time. Then he left.

Why should either of us care right now? I only want to remember, to celebrate, to bark Here’s To The Night, the many nights, the many days, to the times…

The E-days, the moments grandma or grandpa would come with turkey and ham, or when we would go to that place that stuck me with pokey things (shudders), only you would get me McDonald’s and say you were sorry about all those people muzzling me.

These were our vacations, getaways, and holidays. When my favorite girl would come over, we would have all sorts of food and watch the glow box. Sweet. Peaceful and Awesome.

M Anime wasn’t my potential future stepmom yet, but you were talking to her, Daddy.

Honestly, I’m going to say it, “And in this moment, I am happy.” You’d never say that, I know. Who needs Heaven when “I only want to be with you.” But Braxton’s Verity Vacation Virgil

“But think about it― what would your pet’s Heaven be like?”
Yes, Pets Do Go To Heaven!
By Sophia Grace

“There, the heroes who have lived justly and honorably enjoy endless leisure, free from the burdens of earthly cares.”
Aeneid

1835 Days Without B III, Day 1276 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 217 ~Seeing Double B, V~

B’s Best Girl will tell you that I don’t drink. Thanks to my effing Day Job, I’m back on energy shots. “Bloom.” The correlation? Clueless. But I’m trippin, I’m sliding, I’m riding through the back like buck. Dreamt of twins. “Seeing Double B, V”

Tuesday, February 3, 2026

Journey 217 ~Seeing Double B, V~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? That doesn’t make me an angel. I’m more like a cyclops. Anatomically correct and everything.

But before we get all horizontal, it’s time for my favorite gameshow, Things you can say about your doggos AND your girlfriend/ex-girlfriend/wife. Dammit, August 24th.

Babydoll, I wasn’t drunk then… Ok, I was a little “Drunk On You.” Oh, I’m starting up early this AM with the music. When I wake up to you, my “Starry Eyed Surprise,” my “Angel.” Suppose Anita Baker and Shaggy can agree. Hmm? You’re an angel… Now B and V…

We can pretend. But my boys… Eyes, ears, and noses everywhere. Braxton knows I can’t see a goddamn thing with all the crying I’ve been doing lately about him. And Virgil as well. And the month is only just beginning. As I was saying last night, the 4th, 10th, 13th

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I See Fire, as in Braxton’s Cremation, thank you, Ed Sheeran. I should get my eyes checked because that can’t be my son’s name telling me he’s gone. I collected his “remains” on Wednesday, February 10, 2021. And it will be his 21st birthday on the 13th. I really need to start drinking. But my boys are already the most beautiful things in this world.

Oh yeah, you too, my gorgeous wife. If you want to drop me love, as King Priam said, “Do you really think death frightens me now?” I relish the idea of closing my eyes and being reunited with my firstborn son. But as I said, I’m no angel. I’m going straight to Hell. And for more than failing my son.

The one-eyed monster in my pants, for starters. Him between your twins? That ain’t very appropriate ha-ha. And why not? A Tuesday morning in bed with you. The kids are asleep. I’m sure V is watching over them. And how many kids are conceived around…

February, uh, Valentine’s Day. A man has to have eyes everywhere. And I wish I could be all romantic with “I Only Have Eyes For You.” I do my love. No doubt about it. Ever.

And if you had a sister… Eww? A twin sister… Is that worse? It’s only a fantasy, my “Sweet Love.” Call it my Double Trouble fantasy. One we could live out. In a way… But I see Braxton’s ashes. Virgil’s fur. Seeing Double B, V

1829 Days Without B III, Day 1270 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 216 ~Braxton, Virgil, Don’t Drink~

Anything beats the taste of tears. And I wish I had chugged some energy drink. But at the moment, there’s only drool. Work sucks, I know. B isn’t the only one who knows a good song. But I don’t feel much like partying. “Braxton, Virgil, Don’t Drink.”

Monday, February 2, 2026

Journey 216 ~Braxton, Virgil, Don’t Drink~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Did you have a good day? Am I really the one asking that? We could both use a drink.

Like father, like son. We don’t drink. My Favorite Girl could tell you that. Grieving…

She’d like to hear from you anyway, Dad, but you’re in no mood, especially since we’re speaking early. Sunday, February 1, 2026. The day after I left five years ago. So you can’t feel bad about not leaving the bed all day. You spent the 31st watching movies, Daddy. I wonder what’s on my little brother’s mind with all this. You know what, scratch that, Dad. And no, I didn’t become a cat or an angel since I got up here, ha! Honestly, Dad, today…

I’m more like a designated driver, more like a walker. I hated your rolling machine.

Daddy, I should also work on my wording. A Walker…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I’m as much of a zombie as you are a swimmer. But if you keep crying like this, you’ll be “Dead Like Me” soon enough with the flood. Now that was not funny. Sorry Dad. Someone has to lighten the mood. And once upon a time, it was as if I was barking “Raindrops Keep Fallin’ On My Head. And with you, Dad, you would always say, when it rains, it pours. But now with Virgil, you know it is/was with me and my little brother, Daddy. “Singin’ In The Rain.” And you are our “Mr. Blue Sky.” Effing soundtrack!

Language! I know Dad. Watch my barks. But after your cry session Saturday, and trying not to drool all over M Anime’s yabbos. Daddy, eww!

She’s been trying to get your attention all day. And “I Can See Clearly Now, the rain is gone.” But not for you last week or this one. You need a whiskey drink, a vodka, a lager, or a cider, right? No, “You can get addicted to a certain kind of sadness,” right, my father.

Or madness when it comes to you humans and love. Again, Daddy, eww! But I’d… Begrudingly accept you and M Anime. Or even the rage you feel at the Bad Place, which is why again we’re talking “Here And Now.” Am I a doctor, a DJ, some sort of drink specialist, whatever the young humans call bartenders? We’re old men. But drinking, partying. Being happy… Gasps. Braxton, Virgil, Don’t Drink

“Grief is like the ocean; it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim.”
― Yes, Pets Do Go To Heaven!
By Sophia Grace

“Potum Largius Aequo”
The Aeneid

1828 Days Without B III, Day 1269 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 210 ~Braxton’s Forgiveness Lessons V~

I’m adding “I’m Sorry” to my list. Words like Happy and Home. And sometimes even the word Love. We say these things and then what? It’s complicated. I want to be and mean more. But first forgiveness. For what? A lot. “Braxton’s Forgiveness Lessons V”

Tuesday, January 27, 2026

Journey 210 ~Braxton’s Forgiveness Lessons V~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And how long has that been again? Am I asking to die? Uh, this week?

As much as I believe I’m going to the Ninth Circle of Hell, I have hope. Such mad hope, but there it is. I may see my son again. My B III. But what about you, our kids, and 2-V?

But first there’s you. Ok, I’m lying. First, there was/is my Braxton. My firstborn son.

Babydoll, “I Knew I Loved You before I met you.” Only I can say the same thing to B III.

“I’m sorry.” Two more words I’ve been thinking a lot about this week. Braxton’s last. That was five years ago, of course. Has Braxton forgiven me for what happened? Death.

McDonald’s doesn’t deliver to the Rainbow Bridge. But with enough time, Braxton would forgive me. A good track record, right?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

“Love Is A Long Road.” As long as “Rainbow Road?” Our children, and that’s Virgil too, deserve better than a man like me. A man who can never forgive the boy who grew up to be me. Would it honor Braxton if I could adopt his teaching? Like adopting Virgil.

Honestly, he’s mine, ours, everything we have. Yet “I’m feelin’ like a prisoner. Like a stranger in a no named town.” And “Nobody Knows it but me.” “What’ve I’ve Done?”

Hell! I should apologize for all the music I’m quoting. Why? I’m not MAGA. FDT! Apologizing to this forty-one-year-old man that I am. What does it do? Whose it for?

Seriously, my dearest Love, it would do nothing. It would mean nothing. I hate myself.

“Only you?” Should you apologize, or shall I? What if we both conceded, concur, and come apart in each other’s arms? Submit, surrender, and swear to each other that what’s done is done, and we can try never to hurt each other again. But we will. It’s Love, always and forever. I could never hate you. Though the term hatefuck comes to mind. And why.

Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? More like “A Hard’s Day Night.” Cruelty? Darling, you can be so “Heartless.” I mourn my son always and forever. And I can’t ask you to mourn a dead man. We’d both be saying we’re sorry until we’re blue in the face, and then what? I love you. Braxton’s Forgiveness Lessons V

1822 Days Without B III, Day 1263 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 209 ~B’s Last Bark Virgil~

If my boy then knew what his Dad knows now. But I don’t blame B. Especially this week. There is always so much noise. The Day Job, the snoring of Braxton’s little doggy bro. And is that the damn phone? And now Braxton’s silence. B’s Last Bark Virgil.

Monday, January 26, 2026

Journey 209 ~B’s Last Bark Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Did you have a good day? How many times have you cried today? Three? A coincidence? Does it matter?

“What is an ocean but a multitude of drops?”
Adam Ewing, David Mitchell’s Cloud Atlas

Not enough ocean to drown in. Not enough to sail to come and “Find Me.” Nowhere near enough to cleanse everything. New beginning? M Anime, Virgil. Man In The Mirror?

Daddy. My father. You haven’t heard the last of me. My name? Braxton BARKS Bradford.

It’s all you can hear right now, but what am I saying? “Every Breath You Take.” Every beat of your heart. But you know what I really miss? Well, I am my father’s son. Always.

The noise, the silence, and everything in between those two ears of yours. Daddy’s brain.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I hope you don’t mind me saying this. Actually, it’s Forrest Gump anyway. Dear Daddy:

“I’m not a smart man… but I know what love is.”
Tom Hanks, Forrest Gump

Again, I am my father’s son, and you’re better than this. Don’t think you are…

Know. No? Not this week anyway. Couldn’t you pick the day I ate your French Toast or Waffles? And the day after, when you protected your pancakes. And I got my nickname. “I love you like pancakes,” you would say, “but you have to calm down.” How about the day I jumped into that rolling thing of yours? I wasn’t the only one who hated that. And I can understand why you were always so angry when you came back from “Wherever You Will Go.” But I didn’t know what I was supposed to bark at. So there was silence.

Dad, I would watch you sleep and make sure whatever was chasing you stayed away.

Only I don’t know what that is now, or rather…

She walked, ran, or got effed five months down the road. I know, Dad, Language! You’ve told me I would have liked her, but I’m not sure. Virgil is trying his best. But M Anime, my potential stepmom, you called her. That’s when you began to feel love once more.

That bitch! Again, I’m minding my barks. But she got you “Smokin Out The Window.” And you wouldn’t call her such-and-such. But another reason I’m mad is this. What happens when you get hurt, Dad? You told my Favorite Girl that you can’t imagine any worse pain than yours truly. And so I need to bark loud enough to overcome the boohoo’s, the bawling, and be your boy, always. Woof, woof! B’s Last Bark Virgil

“Your pets want to help you heal. They want to communicate with you. All you need to do is listen.”
― Yes, Pets Do Go To Heaven!
By Sophia Grace

“Arma Virumque Cano”
(I sing of arms and the man.)
(Book I, opening line) Aeneid

1821 Days Without B III, Day 1262 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 203 ~Just B Here Virgil~

She’s not here, and I doubt she’ll ever be. And how many years were M Anime and I friends to suddenly go, now you’re just “Somebody That I Used To Know.” I knew B practically his whole life. But no wife or kids here. Me, Virgil… “Just B Here Virgil.”

Tuesday, January 20, 2026

Journey 203 ~Just B Here Virgil~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? So why play “Things You Can Say About Your Dog But Not Your Girlfriend” Wife?

“Be Here Now.” Isn’t that from “A Dog’s Purpose”? That reminds me… WTF! I should read yet another book about dog loss next week. Currently, I’m reading another HaremLit book, but we’ll get to that. Like Sunday, January 31, 2021, Saturday, August 13, 2022, Forty-One Effing E-Days. But “You And Me?” I swear I didn’t want to cry today. Effing Lifehouse! Effing Sunday, August 24, 2025. Who would I be if that day went differently?

A “Lonely Soul” sitting in the middle of a “Mad World.” Me and the mutt? Do I mean Braxton’s little brother, Virgil? Tarnished and maidenless, a “geek” playing Elden Ring. Not even a man? Land? No, fatherhood is the epitome of manhood. And some make me out to be androgynous…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

No! You, my love, know I’m all man. But if you weren’t here… Hell, I’d love to be Johnny Sins. I’d fornicate till my cock turns blue. Effing my way across the seven seas. Forever?

If I didn’t have you, my love, I’d end up like Kaoru from Slaves to Passion/Hana Dorei. I would lose myself to… Beautiful but boring. Did I mention I’m reading “Pledged To Him 8” by Neil Bimbeau? What woman would let me have such a life? Cuck, Harem, and more.

How many women do I know who would allow a harem? Well, there’s you, mistress… Have we gotten there yet? Is that something we could both be here for? Because what caused Sunday, August 24, 2025. I still don’t know.

Children? I want to be a father, you want to be a mother, and what comes next? B and V?

They get to be big brothers. Chihuahuas and all. Like Braxton, “You Are Not Here.”

Honestly? That’s what I tell myself every morning, and then I’m proven wrong. My sin?

“Too sexy for my love. Love’s going to leave me.” Yeah, that’s funny. If anything, I haven’t been here for all the days that I’ve mentioned. I haven’t left the exam table where Braxton died. I haven’t risen from the loveseat the first day I got Virgil, and gasped, “What have I done?” I haven’t left the bed since “the breakup.” Or the place where I was born. But I’m expected. Just B Here Virgil

1815 Days Without B III, Day 1256 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 202 ~Braxton’s Dream, Virgil’s Nightmare~

I Have A Dream. Most days, I’m less Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. and more Bing from Fifteen Million Merits. My last dream involved yabbos and fake ones at that. M Anime’s aren’t. And B loved his Favorite Girl’s pair. Braxton’s Dream, Virgil’s Nightmare

Monday, January 19, 2026

Journey 202 ~Braxton’s Dream, Virgil’s Nightmare~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Did you have a good day? Yes, I dared to ask. Whatever. Don’t. Silence. But “I Have A Dream.”

Or I will when you wrap your arms around me and fall asleep like the last week we were together. But that’s not now… No, next week. SIGH, five years. But this week, my father.

It will be five months since another dream… Died? No, she is very much alive, last you knew. Learning about the Birds and the Bees. Dicks and Vaginas? Yes, I know, Dad, that is like so cringe. You had to give me “The Talk” when my Favorite Girl visited us.

However, your Favorite Girl. You left mine alone, and it’s not Cherry. But M Anime. Daddy, I’m not here to say, I told you so, or I informed you thusly. The best legs, breasts, and thighs are in a bucket…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Or a box of chicken. I don’t want to talk about the Glow Box directly. The Last of Us, The Big Bang Theory, and you’re still on about “The Running Man.” And what about Virgil? You compared yourself and my little brother to “The Long Walk—cold, Long, and Sad.

But I Have A Dream today! Dr. Martin Luther King Jr? If you could bring someone back, my father, it would be me. And you are the best man I know. But neither of our dreams would be for the best of everyone. I’m sure you don’t mind me barking, FDT, eff MAGA, all of the Cracker Hats! But what’s my dream? I heard yours yesterday, and while I like girls after touching their yabbos…

Love! You told me that if life is a game for everyone, love is not the prize, it is this…

Instructions. I mastered that the first time we walked together. Ray and Pete, Dad and Me. Not The Long Walk but a walk. Soon it will be you and V. You and my siblings with two legs. Some woman who isn’t M. And ending this week, Dear Heaven, Dear Father.

I have a dream that when you finish your books about her and when my books are everywhere, you’ll realize you “Can’t Me Now.” And you don’t want M anymore.

Honestly, Daddy, I Have A Dream you will rise, writing, women, and wealth. And all with my little brother. A family. Braxton’s Dream, Virgil’s Nightmare

“Let B III stay, that’s all.”
― My Turn To B III: Love, Guilt, and…

“Sleep, the gentlest of the gods, crept down and poured forgetfulness upon his eyes.”
Aeneid

1814 Days Without B III, Day 1255 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Journey 196 ~Virgil, There’ll B Times~

Tick tock. TikTok. When I wake up, it’s usually to the song “Easy Street. My breathing is anything but. If anyone’s reading, you and they know. I wonder whether she knows? Busy with the new hubby? B’s on the Rainbow Bridge. “Virgil, There’ll B Times”

Tuesday, January 13, 2026

Journey 196 ~Virgil, There’ll B Times~

Dear Future Wife,
You know that I love you, right? And “The World Will Know!” The funny papers. A sex tape? New York Times Bestseller.

When I write one. Eventually. Can Erotica be considered? Did I ask that honestly, love?

If anything, I rather it be for one of B III’s books. 2-V’s? We’re way too early for that one. And what about my life story? I have to start living it—The Shawshank Redemption.

“Get busy livin’ or get busy dyin’.”
The Shawshank Redemption

Seriously, every day I tell myself I’m going to start, but I find myself right back here, minus my Braxton. And if Virgil isn’t here… Well, things I will do. That I will create, eww, but since he is here and I have you, my beautiful wife. Again, I find myself, like Cody Rhodes, asking, So, what do you want to talk about?” I have the time. Well, no, but I bought a “clock factory.”

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I don’t think that’s what they mean by buying time. But there’s never time. Darling…

Why do you think I want to stay so busy? My hands look, love, and lose. And today I was looking at next week and the week after… “You know that’s a game that I hate to lose.” Love? And so I’ve been thinking more and more about what it would be like to “Drift Away.” Not this Saturday, but the next is the 24th, and after the 31st. It’s as if Sunday is trying to escape my wrath. And I’m telling myself that after the 24th (5th Month Anniversary), I’ll never speak on that subject again. And the 31st? I’m going to be crying about Braxton forever, my love.

It’s going to be a hard two weeks. “Pictures/Pussy On My Phone,” thank you, Wheeler Walker Jr. And my dear Braxton… That son of mine is bigger than my heart and other things… No wonder my heart was broken when he passed—effing time, beloved.

Memories. And no, I’m not a fan of CATS. I do mean the musical; the fur buddies are alright by me. And one day, I’ll have time, unless you’ve seen how MAGA has been acting lately. AI or Trump is going to kill us all. So again I look to my special drawer, my armory.

I want to protect my family—you, my woman, our wonderful children, and B’s work. I’m still alive. “Times Like These.” Virgil, There’ll B Times

1808 Days Without B III, Day 1249 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 195 ~That’ll B Hue, Virgil~

The Rainbow Connection? How about the theme for Mario Kart’s Rainbow Road? There are no “Sunshine, Lollipops, and Rainbows” at the Day Job. THEY do everything to make that place worse. The place that ki… took my son. But, “That’ll B Hue, Virgil”

Monday, January 12, 2026

Journey 195 ~That’ll B Hue, Virgil~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… I know better than to ask, “Did you have a good day. Another Day? No Day But Today?

Alive? That’s the last thing you want to be, my father. It’s like talking to MAGA. You ask whether Biden won. THEY say Biden was president. Someone asks, “Are you okay? Are you alive?” What do you answer? You’d rather be with me. And am I not alive? I’m here, right now, as always, Dad. I’m sitting at the corner of your bed on a sad Monday afternoon, guarding the door. In case you were wondering why my little brother Virgil is sleeping dead center, ha-ha. He knows his place. But where are you, Dad? Really. One foot in the grave, your eyes on the rainbow, and your ass to the fire. Language, I know, I know. But your tears, Dad. As clear as then…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

The day. The only day that matters to you… Well, not really? Not this year anyway. If anything, I have M Anime to take a bit of the heat off—bad choice of barks. But you know, if you were going through Hell, I would be right there with you. And I am Daddy? Yes.

The day I finally saw all the colors of the rainbow is the day you saw black, white, and gray. The “Colors of the Wind.” I saw you through the evils of MAGA the first time around, and now you have Virgil. And you’ll always have me. Well, not yesterday. Augmenting reality? That video? The first time I got an actual funeral. Didn’t like it.

Daddy, sure, The Rainbow Bridge.

But it’s you, today. Some days, all you see is red. There is far too much orange in the world, you tell me. You wish you weren’t so yellow. You feel a lot of green and worry about it when it comes to you and Virgil. You’re constantly blue. But not enough to fly away. And for that, I’m grateful. And Indigo, Violet. Unless you’re thinking about the game on the glow box “Indigo Prophecy,” or either of the Violets that would have you kicking me out of the room for a while. No, our royal colors are tan, beige, and black. Dad, that brings me to my point today. Whatever color… We truly see each other, always and forever. See! That’ll B Hue, Virgil

“As fast as Braxton could run, he couldn’t outrun time; as high as he could jump, it only brought him closer to Heaven. B was on the way up.”
― My Turn To B III: Love, Guilt, and Silent Loss

“Do you not see what great a weight of darkness the blind night of the body sheds on minds?”
Aeneid

1807 Days Without B III, Day 1248 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son