Tag: Books

Meditation 160 ~A Break Braxton, Virgil…~

WillLeave a comment

Ending is better than mending… Guess what I’ve been reading. Braxton wasn’t something; he was someone. Like Virgil? And he couldn’t be fixed. Virgil was “broken” in a way. And myself. My bank account. And I’m taking breaks. “A Break Braxton, Virgil…”

Sunday, December 8, 2024

Meditation 160 ~A Break Braxton, Virgil…~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And do you think you should clean it? One more thing for the to-do list. Another list…

Like another puppy? How is that working out for you? Like father, like son. Someone. Because Virgil ain’t Braxton. Oh! Why so mean this morning? It’s not like Brave New World isn’t crammed with bullies. But aren’t I a bully? Thou art a villain. But the week has only just begun, and the first question that came to mind was, Are You Happy Now? Seriously?

The last thing you need is to start fawning over one more dark-haired girl. Acting like your Stuff & Thang ain’t never seen a woman. What must Braxton’s Aunt think of you when you sent her the first three chapters of Nightmare At The Meat Market. M Anime liked the title. But what I don’t like? Failing Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Heartache of Pet Loss
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 036, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

At least I’m back to finishing books. And you’ve finally started your end of the world, dystopia, and evil government arc. It’s like you’re living in your own literary world, right? Well, come January with Trump. Define interesting… Oh, God, oh, god, we’re all gonna die. Making the list: Brave New World, 1984, Fahrenheit 451, and It Can’t Happen Here.

Amazon still thinks you’re breaking tradition by suggesting several Christmas “Romances” and books about broken hearts over pet loss. B needed a break from you.

Inevitably, everyone does. Why look into a dog’s eyes when you can stare at Yabbos?

Before the phone “broke…” ran out of juice, whatever you saw, a yearly recap that was all Virgil’s eyes and several pairs of Yabbos. Even a video that Cherry wouldn’t appreciate… While you’re doing that, there are Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Brave New World, Aldous Huxley
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

And you can’t seem to Break On Through To The Other Side. I broke that coffee mug yesterday. It was your phone today. And your bank account… check the refrigerator.

Hell! What about your body? Winston Smith didn’t have Soma. You have a bottle full of painkillers. If you want any advice from me… All you need is one unless you plan on joining B. And that boy deserves his retirement. As if he did. B is better than Spotify.

But what does Virgil do? Well, if you gave him a chance… Now that should go on Six Impossible Things. Only the list isn’t broken. It’s you, hi, you’re the problem, it’s you. A broken thing. Braxton tried. But you’re liberal. A Break Braxton, Virgil…

1407 Days Without B III, Day 848 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 158 ~B’s Reading Room Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I don’t think I read anything besides the Day Job schedule today. At least I still have one in comparison to the two brothers I know. The lady said get to work. They didn’t read the room. Rooms come and go like some books, ha… B’s Reading Room Virgil

Friday, December 6, 2024

Meditation 158 ~B’s Reading Room Virgil~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… But I’m not in My Library/Braxton’s Room. I still prefer a Study to a Man Cave.

The Den is a room I haven’t seen in a while. Speaking of being in the wrong room one day…

The Day Job Training Room:
So I’m sitting, well, training… Weekly Wins and Ads, etc. I was also writing a list of signs one of the managers wanted to make. So, the manager came into the office without realizing I was in the training room. She and a few others talked about firing a couple of “brothers” for… not working. Lady Sophia, I was there when she warned them about it. So I can’t blame her for it. But still, I can’t help but feel sorry for my fellow black men. Their removal wasn’t racist or rushed. They didn’t read the room. My people, Sophia…

“Are you illiterate, n-word? You can’t read between the lines?

But what is this bedroom telling me? Receipts, tags that shouldn’t be removed, and my morning cappuccino isn’t as rejuvenating as I hoped it would be. Rich and flavorful, Ha.

Rich Men Make Room For:
More Money! More Money! Because I want to be part of the problem. If I had my way, Lady Sophia, I would be the whole problem. Why? I Wanna Be Rich. How about not starving? Didn’t I say something about that yesterday? But that’s because I’m broke. How about now? This isn’t boycotting Chick-fil-A because of the LGBTQ community, Sophia.

I’m not supposed to shop at Walmart because of their stance on DEI. I support DEI. I should cancel my Amazon subscription. I need to leave X/Twitter. Read the room.

Lady Sophia, it would beat reading the rap sheet. It turns out the criminals I know aren’t so smooth. I read about one group of criminals: Trump, Musk, MAGA, Racists… It’s a reflection of our society. Isn’t it? We’re doomed.

Inevitable that the ones who do crime, not in “plain sight,” would get theirs’s someday.

Room For One More Online:
Let’s just say I’m glad I learned a bit about Crypto. I use a fake email. And I should really start using a VPN for more than just P***hub. I’m not defending the criminals. But like anyone from MAGA, I’ll willingly ignore the dignity of others, wallow in degradation, and be disgusting if it justifies my deep depravity. I spent hours writing a book on much worse. But publishing such for B’s Reading Room Virgil.

1405 Days Without B III, Day 846 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 154 ~B The Soft Things~

WillLeave a comment

I’ve been sleeping hard the last few days. No, I haven’t. Eww! Where’s V? On his pillow someplace. He needs a new one. Walmart ain’t exactly known for quality. And I was busy making the house a soft place for B’s aunt to land. B The Soft Things.

Monday, December 2, 2024

Meditation 154 ~B The Soft Things~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… right there beside you, Always. Have faith. It’s not any of the strange drinks lifting your arms up. Right?

But it might take a while. Don’t think about “THAT DAY.” But the many days that there were, you would come back to me, angry, sad, confused, and all the above, and you would wrap an arm around me and just go to sleep. You remember the days you would return, and I would jump into your arms. Even on your worst days, your arms would beat sitting on the hardwood floor. And you know how I felt about sitting anywhere that didn’t have a cushion for my tail. Speaking of tales, I was there with you and my aunt on Saturday. Well, to you, she’s my aunt. But to me, she’s The Most Beautiful Girl in the World, Daddy.

Always and forever, she’s soft.

And I don’t mean to say she’s not tough. Hardcore. A Survivor. It’s easier to hear from a pair of those ear thingies you wear than the rough voice of a dead man. So what does that mean for me now that you’re listening, Daddy? You still have some of my fur. My comfy spots…

I never yielded! And as you can see, I am not dead!
T’Challa, Black Panther

Yes, Dad, we talked about your dream here in this place. The Void? The Endless Dark? A place where there is no darkness? The Rainbow Bridge? If anything, Dad, it doesn’t matter if I’m wide awake or dead asleep… I’m sorry, bad joke. I’m happy being comfortable. And where am I most comfortable? Anywhere with you. Even Virgil sees that. He feels that you know. Between you and my aunt…

When Virgil sat there as you and she watched movies, you couldn’t push Virgil away.

I’m making an observation. You have to appreciate the soft things. Look at me, Daddy.

I’m as soft as the silence on a really good day. The song that plays that reminds you of me. The sheets on the bed that you wrap yourself in when you dread tomorrow, today. The world is a hard enough place. And when you rescued Virgil, you took responsibility. What, to put a soft pillow under his tail? Amongst other things. My father’s better.

Daddy, I know you are. Iron Will but soft enough to feel my love. And to know there’s a beautiful and soft place for Virgil. Somewhere. B The Soft Things

1401 Days Without B III, Day 842 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Meditation 153 ~Virgil, They’ll B Endings~

WillLeave a comment

It’s the 1st of Tha Month and my head is barely hanging onto my neck. It could be because I woke up early yesterday. I was busy looking for stuff to clean. Then, I laughed with my boys’ aunt. So the world didn’t end? “Virgil, They’ll B Endings.”

Sunday, December 1, 2024

Meditation 153 ~Virgil, They’ll B Endings~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And seeing how you’re standing here, I must apologize. My aunt was wrong. Me, destroying the world.

No. That’s never been my cup of tea or cappuccino. Oh, and I’m sorry I didn’t buy you any cappuccino. It was about $70.00 preparing for Braxton’s aunt. Another $46.00 on Chinese food. But hey, you’re eating right. And I had good company. The world…

Inevitably, life goes on. Or, as a great man once said, life finds a way. Not for your aunt, though. That’s a bit harsh… But isn’t that your mood right now? Trying to get laid… Honestly, no man works harder. So it is my fault that you feel so lousy. Do you want to get up and grab some painkillers? You would prefer the end with how the night ended.

Well, you’re going to lie about these Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Heartache of Pet Loss: Losing Your Best Friend
    Failed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VOICING M Anime’s Nightmare… Nightmare At The Meat Market NEW
    Completed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 029, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 036 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

Can you guess which one you’re lying on? I can give you a hint or a clue. And the answer:

I thought better of it…

But let’s focus on #1. Have you ever failed that one? And now you’re reading list is shot to Hell. It’s been decided you’re not going to read Christmas “Romances” this year. If the world ends… Excuse me, if American ends come January, there are excellent odds that it won’t be your fault. So time to read what to expect… Oh! Right, where’s your money?

I had my first movie night with Braxton’s Aunt without Braxton, so Virgil’s Aunt. Hmm? And a good time was had by all. Virgil wasn’t too embarrassing. She loves him.

NaNoWriMo’s is done. I finished 50,000 words. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Heartache of Pet Loss
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 036, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

So, I survived the humiliations of Black Friday. I finished 50,000 words of a book (I can never publish). The house didn’t fall down around me, Braxton and Virgil’s Aunt, and Virgil himself. And I endured No Nut November… You messed up after midnight, friend.

And yes, we agree that we will lie about that unless you decide to mess up again today. No wonder you’ve been all “religious” considering this morning. But last night

The Book of Clarence? Or was it that you dreamed of the words from dead men? Last night, waking up from messing up, you dreamed you were surrounded by dead men. The Green Ranger, Black Panther, Braxton, and others. They said you were found wanting.

What? Virgil, They’ll B Endings.

1400 Days Without B III, Day 841 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 151 ~B Angry Little V~

WillLeave a comment

“It’s effing okay to be nice!” B’s honorary aunt is coming over. V is burning a hole in the side of my leg. I kept my Day Job after Black Friday’s humiliations. Nice scares me. It killed B. Um, Indifference? But that was being nice. B Angry Little V.

Friday, November 29, 2024

Meditation 151 ~B Angry Little V~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… But once again, dear one. “It’s been a big day. I’m a little tired.” And more?

Whether I want them to or not, my sons take after me. Braxton is angry and scared. Or he was when he first met his aunt. Virgil is tired and terrified. And tomorrow, Lady Sophia…

Well, Virgil will be meeting his honorary aunt for the first time. We’ll get there… However, I want to talk about what happened earlier today. I’m feeling a bit unsure. Was I brave? Have I become a billionaire yet? Did I live in a way that made my Braxton proud? Do you see the time?

Anger takes a lot out of you, Sophia. If Braxton were here, I would have woken up long before now. No! I’m not mad at Virgil doing his part, though my leg is burning, Sophia.

What did Dante tell Virgil?

“You get off my back! You think I want this?! It just happened!” What, watching “Papa’s Got a Brand-New Excuse?” Or how I’ve been thinking the whole day; we need a new plague. Black Friday has never been a fun time. And I’ve been so fearful today and humiliated so many times that I’ve been grasping at anything and everything to make me mad. “Anger is more useful than despair.” My apologies, dear Lady Sophia… For the truth? Or for quoting movies and TV. You must remember the movie nights I would share with Braxton and his honorary aunt. I need to find something for us to watch tomorrow. Hmm.

And that’s another reason I’m angry. The house is a broken mess. There’s too much…

Like tonight? I’m talking to you at 6:30 in the evening. Hell! Even my “arousal” for the PIB sisters wasn’t enough to keep me awake. Oh, and I incorporated them into my story along with others. Because I’m that much of a CREEP. I need people to hate me, Sophia.

There is too much hatred for one man to possess. Anger, at least. Bruce Banner has The Hulk. Trump has MAGA. And currently, I have writing. But I don’t hate Virgil. No, not ever! I don’t hate you, Lady Sophia. I don’t hate the people in “my” novel. If anything, you know who I hate. The guy who downed an energy shot and is about to taste, more like regurgitate the rainbow. Better out than in. B Angry Little V.

1398 Days Without B III, Day 839 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 147 ~Turkey Day, B Willing~

WillLeave a comment

Can turkeys fly? I looked up the answer today. No wonder America has issues. I’ve dreamed my son was a bird here or there, a pigeon or an albatross. I had to look that up, too. As I’m not watching the news or how to cook turkey. Turkey Day, B Willing

Monday, November 25, 2024

Meditation 147 ~Turkey Day, B Willing~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Are you beginning to believe? What, in The Matrix? A world without me in it. I’m right here, Dad.

And for once, I’m not begging you for food, though I ask that you share it with my little brother. Wow, I accepted Virgil as a family member before you? My brother and your son.

You’re wondering… What’s with all the movies, right? I’ve been sitting there right next to you. When you’re watching them all, writing, and you can’t kick me out anymore when you’re looking at women… I’m kidding about that last one. You would say, “Not today.”

That was whenever my Aunt came around, and I wanted to play with my toys. Let the good times roll. But you’ve been having Hard Times. But this week, Thursday. For real. It is my favorite day after my birthday and your E-Day. Of course.

As if you needed to be reminded of the day. Every day for me is this question. “When’s Dad coming home? We both smile at that but for different reasons. But this is my time now, so listen to me. When I asked when you were coming home, it was more than the place that took you away from me from time to time. It’s when I thought about when you’d smile. Which was rare.

Oh, and now you’re crying, and that will make me cry. Keep listening to me. Coming home is when you hold me in your arms, and there was nothing but us. It was that look you would give me when you knew you had nothing to fear because I was there. You’re not a chicken.

You aren’t a pigeon. Neither are you a seagull. With the election, you’re not an eagle. And no, you’re definitely not a turkey. I’d call you my superhero, my master, a king, maybe a titan, or even a god. Father is God in the eyes of a child. But I know who you are. Dad.

You’re my Dad. And my Dad is stronger than anything and everything. “Behold Thy Creation.” Seriously, Dad, you don’t believe I’m speaking. You had to look that quote up. It’s from 2009’s Creation. Coincidence? I was four that year, and Virgil is four. And what am I, Dad? “I’m a leaf on the wind. Watch how I soar.” No. I’m the wind, breath, yours. Today, always. Turkey Day, B Willing

1394 Days Without B III, Day 835 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Meditation 146 ~Virgil’s Weakness To B~

WillLeave a comment

“No place for weakness. Only the hard and strong may call themselves Spartans.” I only called myself B’s Dad. And now I’m just another guy with regards to V. A WEAK and a pathetic one at that. But to somehow survive this week. Virgil’s Weakness To B.

Sunday, November 24, 2024

Meditation 146 ~Virgil’s Weakness To B~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And I don’t envy you. I was about to vent about my work, but then I realized the weight of your work and the Day Job. I can only imagine how tough this week will be. Sigh

But your work? Add on the Day Job as well… At the end of the day, which you wish was today or Friday, November 29. 2024. You’ll have lived one of the worst weeks ever.

Nothing will ever be worse than the week Braxton passed away. But considering you’re only now just waking up… This week is already shaping up to be pretty effing terrible.

Oh, come on now! I’ve said plenty worse than the word, effing. I’ve been working on the novel this past week. And now it’s up to you to finish it. And again, that’s on top of you having to survive the Day Job. No wonder you woke up looking for a grave after looking for Braxton. Not, Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING A Little Guidance: A Slice of Life Contemporary Harem (3)
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 022, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 029 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

You feel gross with having to thank MAGA for not being gross when it comes to #4. This has been the easiest and the HARDEST No Nut November ever. Sure, there have been trials, temptations, and traps. What about TRIUMPH? What, the insult comic dog?

Madness. And I’ve still been staying away from the news since the election. Weak people. Or should you say the people you’re going to meet this week? And you’re sick.

No! You write fiction. It’s other people that have ruined the country. Racist and Ra*ist. Women are a much better weakness than outright ignorance. Then again, what have you been writing lately? Or stealing? Bible Black, Saimin Seishidou, other animations…

Anything to avoid what the world is. Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING The Heartache of Pet Loss: Losing Your Best Friend
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VOICING M Anime’s Nightmare… Nightmare At The Meat Market NEW
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 029, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

It’s rare that the list changes. You’re so tempted to put down, don’t wake up tomorrow morning. There is nothing in it for you. And I’m sorry I don’t have any words of encouragement for you. I can’t even give you the outline for the next chapter, though you know how the story will end. How will this week end? Other than the Humiliations Galore. But that’s an everyday occurrence. If only you could wake up with the knowledge of what awaits you. Ignorance is bliss… More like 1984. Seriously.

War is peace.
Freedom is slavery.
Ignorance is strength.
1984

Art imitates life. Uh, you should rethink your booklist for the holiday season. Get past Thanksgiving and Black Friday first… Be a better Man because you’re Virgil’s Weakness To B

1393 Days Without B III, Day 834 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 144 ~Closer Than B, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

WARNING: 18+ For elements and the outline of the novel I’m writing. What’s one more day of being lazy? Well, I did make the outline bigger. It’s 600 words. But as the song goes, “And I don’t wanna miss a thing.” 40 years? 15? 4? Closer Than B, Virgil

Friday, November 22, 2024

Meditation 144 ~Closer Than B, Virgil~

Hey Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… But not today. I should finish “my” novel by the end of the month. Good Luck!

Braxton willing. Because I don’t believe in God anymore. He, She, They, or It didn’t save my firstborn son. And Virgil? He’s been closer lately, as I have been burnt out with writing. The Smiths tune inspired today’s fifteenth chapter, Please Let Me Get What I Want. And by another song, Pistolgrip-Pump by Volume 10.

Chapter Fifteen: What I Pump This Time
Cherry prepares to be of service to Richard Thornfield, William, and Antonio. But plans to fulfill her desires.

  1. From Cherry’s POV. Begin in Cherry’s car as she speeds to work, expecting good news from Richard Thornfield. Cherry believes that Richard Thornfield has had enough of Sofía. And he’ll either sell her to someone far away from William. Hide her. Or kill her. Cherry smiles at the possibilities.
  2. Cherry quickly remembers William’s love for Sofía and fears Richard Thornfield could give William the news without her. Fearing that William may do something drastic, Cherry begins to drive even faster to reach Thornfield’s office in time. Upon arriving, Cherry strips to her red nightie and enters Thornfield’s office.
  3. Cherry watches Richard Thornfield having sex with a BBW nurse who’s around her size. Not stopping, Richard grunts orders to Cherry about the party they will be having at his hotel in a few days with his business associates. Richard Thornfield invites Cherry and says William has been too.
  4. Cherry asks about the fate of Sofía. Richard Thornfield tells her that Sofía is the main attraction and will be used to satisfy his business associates. When Cherry asks about William, Richard Thornfield says he is creating another scene for Sofía and is selecting girls to attend the party.
  5. Cherry walks down the hall in her red pumps. Cherry comes to one of the rooms and opens the door. Inside, several women stand in various stages of undress. But they all have a doctor or nurse vibe. The women pull William, attempting to entice him to select them.
  6. Cherry watches as William is eventually undressed except for his black socks but resists their advances. Cherry asks William if she can give him some stress relief by having sex, but he declines her offer. William says there is currently a movie being made that he must check on.
  7. Cherry and William go to another room done up as a hospital motif. Sofía is dressed in a pink nurse’s uniform and is currently having sex with a man dressed as a patient. William can’t help himself as he strokes himself off to the scene. Cherry’s heart beats faster.
  8. Cherry attempts to distract William by asking what is this scene for. Grabbing William’s other hand, Cherry rubs it across her own breasts. William continues watching Sofía but tells Cherry it’s a screen test for another rough scene in which Sofía will have to perform at Richard Thornfield’s party.
  9. Cherry gives up, attempting to entice William, and walks out angrily. Cherry picks up her clothes outside Richard Thornfield’s office and gets in her car. In her anger, Cherry finds herself outside a small gun shop. Cherry intends to buy several weapons, but the owner reminds her of William.
  10. Cherry seduces the owner, and they have sex in his office. As the owner promises Cherry anything she wants, Cherry begins to form a plan. Cherry, being trusted by Richard Thornfield, knows she can buy weapons for his party’s security. After orgasming, Cherry takes a few guns for herself.
  11. Cherry then drives to Antonio’s home. Cherry finds Antonio in a state of madness as he realizes that Sofía is more popular than ever and that Richard Thornfield will not be getting rid of Sofía anytime soon. Cherry orders Antonio to sit as she points a shotgun at him.
  12. Antonio and Cherry talk about the next part of the plan. Cherry in an act of faith hands Antonio the shotgun. Cherry warns him that if she were to die, Antonio wouldn’t survive the night. Antonio isn’t sure who should die. Cherry watches him jerk off to Sofía’s movies.

15,000 words to go, Lady Sophia, out of 50,000. So close. Closer Than B, Virgil.

1391 Days Without B III, Day 832 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Meditation 140 ~B Z’s No Longer~

WillLeave a comment

“If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.” Or my B III that weighs less than ten pounds, sitting on my head every morning. My lap or chest while reading. Have a heart for the little guy. What? B Z’s No Longer

Monday, November 18, 2024

Meditation 140 ~B Z’s No Longer~

Hey Dad,
It’s Me, Baby B… Still don’t believe me? Free Up Your Mind… That’s what you’re doing right now. Or listening to Pokémon’s Playlist.

Who needs a Pokémon when you had me? Do you remember when you told me that? Pokémon: The First Movie came out, well… way before my time. “Life” before existence.

Daddy, you would have been fourteen, way back then. But I remember when you would sing all the Pokémon songs to me. The joy in your voice and the love in your eyes are memories I cherish. The theme song, Brother My Brother, Together Forever, even the Jigglypuff song when you were lulling me off to sleep rubbing my belly.

There was also “The Time Has Come…” But that was so far away. Sometimes, you didn’t talk. And sometimes I didn’t listen. But just like today isn’t today, Saturday, November 9, 2024, and Monday, November 18, 2004. We’re here, Dad, you and me together. I still sound like that book.

Speaking of books, what are you reading next? I’m more of a what’s in the bag and what’s in the box. It’s my birthday type of guy. But yesterday… was it just yesterday we talked about books? But, “This Christmas will be a very special Christmas.” “In my mind.” I am my father’s son, after all. Speaking through the music. A beast with a beat.

Anyway, back to books. You’ve been thinking about what to read next. And it won’t be the usual Christmas stuff you got REALLY quiet for. Tradition… Everything tells you to prepare for what’s to come in a 1984 Brave New World, The Handmaid’s Tale, It Can’t Happen Here sort of way. You and I always expected zombies to rise. Unfortunately,

It’s not the moans of the undead. Oh me? I’m not dead. You feel that beat within your chest right now. You hear that voice that isn’t entirely yours. You changed titles; how many times now? What about those little cries, the pitter-patter of feet, and the sigh of contentment?

But why now? I’m not bugging you, am I? And neither is Virgil’s breathing, Daddy.

Breathe in and breathe out. If Virgil can do it, you can too. He is there to remind you, Dad. And maybe it’s your need for balance. You say I left silence. And now the world is making too much noise. But remember, you’re not alone. You need to hear that somebody loves you. Like the force? I love you, always. B Z’s No Longer.

1387 Days Without B III, Day 828 of Virgil’s Arrival

Always and Forever,
Your Son

Meditation 139 ~Virgil, Please B Patient~

WillLeave a comment

Time is an excuse. Between making sure I don’t starve and writing? Uh… Is that what I’m calling my “novel?” It’s not fit for Pure Taboo. Then, I have my “spiritual” son. And the one that always had to wait until later. Virgil, Please B Patient

Sunday, November 17, 2024

Meditation 139 ~Virgil, Please B Patient~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… Are you too busy to even look at me? You’ve written 450 words for no GOOD reason.

14 days… If you can keep going for those two weeks, then congratulations. You will have completed another NaNoWriMo, in how long? It has been quite a while. When was the last time I tried pulling an all-nighter to write? When was there ever the time? Um, better you don’t think about that. It’s better if you don’t think about a lot of things. Braxton…

Today, yours and his song were playing on your brain. Run Boy Run. It was released in 2012. The year the world was supposed to end… Sigh. But you heard it around January 2015 in the trailer for Dying Light. And in what month did Braxton Barks pass away again?

Coincidence? Virgil’s waiting for those coincidences. And Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Taking the Team: An explicit hotwife group menage, Lolita Minx
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 015, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Completed (Day 022 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am
    Failed

I’m sure one of these days, it will be “Love ya V, Love ya Virgil,” as it was with Braxton.

For now, though, you’ll stick with later. But you know what can’t wait until later. Democracy? Uh, Freedom? You’re still mad about Trump winning and the entire government being lost. The White House, Senate, House, and the Supreme Court. Fallen.

You can’t think about that, though, when you’re writing. You were even tempted to suspend us talking so you could write. However, you want to avoid ending up behind bars.

As I’ve been singing all this week, First let me explain that I’m just a black man (a black man). And before you tell me the next chapter of your story. There’s Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING A Little Guidance: A Slice of Life Contemporary Harem (3)
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 022, No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT Being The Man My Son Thinks I Am

Chapter Eleven: Ass Kept Behind The Glass (Antonio Mateo Correa)

Antonio’s obsession with Sofía drives him mad. He begins to lose all contact with her. With her number blocked, his online account suspended, and kicked out of her store, he is at a loss of what to do. Only to realize he is on video and can be blackmailed without question. Tracking the adult video of himself back to Cherry, he stalks her instead. Upon finding her in a rather compromising situation, he begins to formulate a new plan to get to his real goal, his lady love, Sofía. Somehow, someway, she will be his.

You can see why I’m worried. But there isn’t any time to worry. Write and Love… Virgil, Please B Patient.

1386 Days Without B III, Day 827 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will