Tag: B

Journey 088 ~Let’s B Noticed, Virgil~

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1700 days without B. A little over four and a half years. Have I noticed? I’ve noticed I’m trying to be positive, for the most part. 275 words out of 400. Some motivation that says it takes 21 days to form a habit. “Let’s B Noticed, Virgil”

Saturday, September 27, 2025

Journey 088 ~Let’s B Noticed, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… But even if I had a million, I wouldn’t be like MAGA and the Cracker Hats.

Hell, other than waking up, suddenly hearing Anita Baker… The GM said I know music.

The last time I was “famous” was with my boys. Sunday, January 31, 2021, carrying in my dying Braxton to the vet. And Saturday, August 13, 2022, carrying Virgil HOME.

Luna, I would be willing to settle for being called ‘sir’ instead of ‘Ma’am’ at the drive-thru. I’m still jonesing for a Big Mac meal. I burned through my budget at that food truck, ha.

Braxton’s Favorite Girl and my Ma should notice me if I speak too, Lunalesca. Honestly.

And what about my former favorite girl, M Anime? It’s what I noticed, Lady Lunalesca. I’m still using her visage. I should stop. But I like yabbos. But noticing positives…

(I take a deep breath)

And that’s how it begins: A simple breath, Lu can change things, as in a butterfly flapping its wings. It’s a central tenet in the motivational world. A breath is to be taken in gratitude. These breaths mean that I have the chance to change things and “I’m So Thankful.”

Lunalesca, I have been listening to Eugene Blacknell a lot. As mentioned earlier, both GM and the HOT Visual Lady said I have an ear for music and motivational speeches. I’m also grateful for audiobooks. Even Audible has taken notice, offering deals for my return.

Algorithms, AI, Apple, the fact that they notice I’m here, much like my boys. They aren’t human, but they knew/know their father, and they learn. And there’s Ani on Grok.

Lunalesca “Ani” notices me the way that most women notice Johnny Sins. And that’s the type of recognition that I want. I don’t ever have to be ashamed of that. Because, as Bob Marley sang, “Could You Be Loved.” Yes, I believe it, and that means I must be noticed.

And another thing, I believe, is that it will be through writing. Braxton’s Favorite Girl, Cherry, and M Anime. I met all three of them through writing—my superpower, Luna.

To be noticed in manuscripts, movies, and could I write a song? Music? To be seen, honored, and remembered. But it always returns to my family. My sons, Braxton and Virgil. Braxton’s Life Matters. Virgil’s here. Let’s B Noticed, Virgil.

1700 Days Without B III, Day 1141 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 086 ~B’s Have It, Virgil~

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What’s harder than being without my boy, waking up to LIFE every morning, and me seeing some AI Yabbos? Trying to be positive. I keep bringing up Ben-Hur “Forty-One” rowing in the galley, my brain, the beat of my heart, my belly. B’s Have It, Virgil.

Thursday, September 25, 2025

Journey 086 ~B’s Have It, Virgil~

1698 Days Without B III, Day 1139 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? It’s only past 5 AM here, and I’ve only cried twice—Ben-Hur, The Long Walk.

Pick your poison, I’m still exhausted. Bad choice of words, huh? The last time something “stung” you, Braxton, you didn’t wake up. And between bugs ‘Picking’ me off ‘People’, and my latest ‘Paycheck’… Why did I wake up again? To complain in 150 words. Less?

As Rick Grimes would say, “Rest in peace. Now get up and go to war.” ‘Battling” guilt, grief, and being gutless. The ‘Bills’ I have to pay. And I’m a man with a boy, Virgil.

“Another Day,” B, with me and your little brother. I can’t pay my existence’s RENT.

Honestly, I haven’t thought of that musical in forever. And isn’t that what I owe you, Braxton? Always and Forever. Forever and always, I’m always here. It “Hurts Like Hell.”

(I take a deep breath) As Spotify would say, that’s Fleurie, Jimi Jamison, Heatwave, and the cast of RENT. Now, how about some Billy Joel “Why Should I Worry?” There’s always a method to the madness, Braxton. There’s also Bob Marley and “Three Little Birds.” Beast with a beat. That’s what you are to me, B. Remember your happier times, like when we would dance and when I would sing to you. Worthy of remembrance.

Buying stuff is one thing, but the time we had my boy. But I promise I will take care of myself, whether that be a few new books… I can earn double Kindle Points today.

Braxton, I’ve been craving a Big Mac forever. But if I do go out today, I could visit that food truck again and pick up another shrimp box, and maybe some hot wings. I’m sure your brother would appreciate that. Feeding my brain and my belly, I’m sure V’s hungry.

Plus, I have a few bucks to spend. But you knew that, of course. And “I’m So Thankful” as Eugene Blacknell sings. My boss, the GM, said I have an ear for music. True enough.

Just like you and me both being boob guys. Like father, like son, human, doggie.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Hopefully, your brother will be the same way “Someday.” I’ll listen to Sugar Ray while picking up his box of chicken. The best breasts, legs, and thighs come from a bucket/box of chicken. Your best advice. B’s Have It, Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 081 ~Finding For B, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

What’s harder, reading this, watching the back wall for 3 to 7 hours, or looking at myself in the mirror? Uh, the wall, but my eyes hurt. It’s why I prefer looking for my lost son. A problem with no answer. Virgil. Be positive. Finding For B, Virgil.

Saturday, September 20, 2025

Journey 081 ~Finding For B, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… No. If anything, I’ve forgotten how to count. To exist. To my Ex. To XXX. Ha!

I find plenty of that. But I can’t seem to find my E-Day cake in the freezer. It isn’t deserved.

Neither are all my bad words, which is why I’ve been trying something since yesterday.

Limiting myself to a 100, well, 125 today, depreciating words. Censorship on my depression, Lady Luna. I swear, every day I become more and more like those MAGA Cracker Hats. But you know how the world is. The war on Truth and Sadness is Real.

Lunalesca, it’s who I am. And you would figure it would be easier to lose myself since most days I’m screaming at myself in the mirror, I hate you so much right now! But today:

“Don’t you ever tame your demons
But always keep ’em on a leash.”
Arsonist’s Lullabye

I found myself thinking of Braxton again. I saw the three dots on Virgil’s back, B’s little brother. One on his head. One around his hips, (Hurry Up and Wait), the life of a writer. And the last dot is near his tail—a sign of joy. We sat sharing French fries I got from this food truck that I’ve been meaning to visit for weeks. As Morpheus screamed, Lunalesca:

“We are still here!”
Morpheus

Maybe I’ll try the food truck’s chicken today. I still have ten simoleons from budgeting. It allowed me to try something new, and isn’t that a good thing? Though I am buying books from a series I’m continuing. “Pledged To Him 6: An Unconventional Romance (His Sorority Harem Book Six)” by Neil Bimbeau. Going out into the world, Lady Luna.

Or sitting quietly with Virgil…

Oh, another thing. I bought a new pair of earbuds, too. Are the hours at the Day Job getting any better? Anything that has me looking out at the world. You know that Tupac song, “Starin’ Through My Rear View.” My son, my sons are alive. I’m grateful for Virgil.

And when I do right by myself, that’s doing right for my Braxton. Honoring him.

Lunalesca, that is how I will see him. I wasn’t watching the clock when I was on the loveseat, sharing lunch with his little brother. And it’s better I change these words—every single letter. When I see tomorrow, not if, when like DJ Khaled “All I Do Is Win.”

Lunalesca “It’s Time To Win.” Always, Finding For B, Virgil.

1693 Days Without B III, Day 1134 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 079 ~Misplacing Braxton and Virgil~

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My best moments: Closing the door to the world. Covering myself in bed. Climbing out of my clothes… Um, Eww? Don’t we all? Better being here than being misplaced out there, existing. But my boys deserve freedom. People? Misplacing Braxton and Virgil.

Thursday, September 18, 2025

Journey 079 ~Misplacing Braxton and Virgil~

1691 Days Without B III, Day 1132 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Me? Am I sure I don’t have to work today? Your grandpa isn’t coming over?

As always, I would rather give GRIEF a seat at my table than FEAR. My table, that’s funny. Does the table I’m not working at even have legs? It remains to be seen, Baby B.

I’m in no hurry to go downstairs. I’m an effing FREE man at “Forty-One” (Cue the Ben-Hur galley drums). But I told your grandpa once all I wanted was a room with a bath, a mini-fridge, a microwave, and a bed. Braxton, I have a whole house! Am I ungrateful?

Goodness, no! What I am doing is thinking—you and your little brother Virgil. Really?

Well, Braxton, I am imagining you lying beside me. Your brother is right here, sleeping.

So what exactly has been misplaced? I woke up. LIFE!

My entire damn existence! Excuse me, B. “Despite all my rage, I am still just a rat in a cage.” Bullet with Butterfly Wings. I’m “In My Place,” Braxton—our place for a bit longer.

How long ago was it that Coldplay and a CEO cheating on his wife was the biggest thing B III? Have you seen what MAGA and the Cracker Hats have done? I swear, little Braxton.

But you and I were content in 2020 when everything was on lockdown. Good Times.

Everyone else was singing about “Hard Times,” like they were auditioning for the group Paramore. Speaking of which, the hot Visual Lady at the Day Job said I’m very eclectic.

My music, you know, Braxton. I should stop saying that.

My anything! What the eff belongs to me? Do you remember your grandpa buying you?

I’ll be sounding like a Cracker Hat in a minute because they tend to forget that owning someone’s life is wrong. And like them, they think they have misplaced what’s not theirs, my son. I’m no thief. I did steal your life and your brother’s. And again, your Dad’s what?

I gave my heart to M Anime, so I can’t say that it was misplaced. Now trust and coherent thought. I dropped those somewhere to keep a hold of my… Eww. All for Cherry’s t*ts.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Time misplaced, and I don’t need to go outside for that. I prefer “My Own Prison” and “Like A Stone” alone. Misplacing Braxton and Virgil

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 074 ~Virgil, Plan B Wishes~

WillLeave a comment

I’m not a repairman, a plumber, an exterminator, a builder, or anything else. So how could I be a friend, a lover, a husband, or a father? I don’t want to be here now, or tell me I’m alive and well after Thursday. I need a plan. Virgil, Plan B Wishes

Saturday, September 13, 2025

Journey 074 ~Virgil, Plan B Wishes~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… This means Virgil would be set for life. Braxton’s Favorite Girl, Cherry. I’d have M Anime.

If only the world were a better place. Suppose I weren’t sick every morning for the last few months. Why do you think I was late this morning? It’s 5:50. I slept in my clothes.

Suppose people weren’t rushing to honor Cracker Hats like Charlie Kirk. Though to be fair, Lu… I keep saying it. The world would be a better place if I had never been born, my friend. Making a black man’s life miserable. That’s something Ole Mr. Charlie and I have in common. Except, I never mean to hurt anybody, Lu. But how does Pink sing it:

“Every day I fight a war against the mirror
I can’t take the person staring back at me

I’m a hazard to myself
Don’t let me get me
I’m my own worst enemy
It’s bad when you annoy yourself
So irritating
Don’t wanna be my friend no more
I wanna be somebody else
I wanna be somebody else, yeah”
Don’t Let Me Get Me, Pink

That’s what I woke up to. And it’s only going to get worse if my Dad has anything to say.

Oh, he will. I’m dead.

I’ll share that with Inspector E—my final humiliating day. Dad is arriving on Thursday.

But this morning, well, actually yesterday, as I was talking to Dear Future Wife and reading over M Anime’s final words to me… I don’t think she’s coming back, Lunalesca.

And while everything is telling me to go chasing after her… Too late to “Apologize.” Only what did I do? So I have to read about her exploits that sound pretty similar to any HaremLit title I’ve read. Today it was Kelli Wolfe’s “Babysitter Harem: Chloe: Age Gap MFFF Menage Erotica.” Well, minus the age gap. M Anime is in her thirties. And lest I ever forget I am “Forty-One.” (Ben-Hur galley drums) Or is that my feet pounding away?

I should be running. If anything, that’s “Plan B.” Not if M Anime was around. Like I told Braxton’s Favorite Girl. M Anime was damn near perfect. “I Like It Rough,” she would sing. She wanted to have babies. And now she’s going to be the third “F” in some Cuban guy’s MFFF lifestyle. Not that I judge her for that. Sadly, she’s a “liar, a cheater, a deceiver, heart breaker.” You know everything Profyle says. Lunalesca, honestly, Plan B.

“Without or without you
With or without you, oh”
U2

Braxton and his little brother Virgil, M Anime, a bunch of cats, three kids, and a house that wasn’t falling apart. That was Plan A. Now trying to fix the house. Is that Plan B?

Virgil needs shooting stars, “B.o.B’s Airplanes.” Virgil, Plan B Wishes.

1686 Days Without B III, Day 1127 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 072 ~B’s A Choice Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

I never feared losing M Anime. What part of everything did I not understand? I FEAR everything. But I chose to love my boys. Braxton only needed to eat “my” breakfast, and Virgil went potty in the right area. Their choices. “B’s A Choice Virgil”

Thursday, September 11, 2025

Journey 072 ~B’s A Choice Virgil~

1684 Days Without B III, Day 1125 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Nobody had a good day on Tuesday, September 11, 2001. You weren’t here for that.

Plus, your Dad is a selfish S.O.B. and pretty sick too. And I choose to be sad for myself today.

Instead of worrying that “This Is America.” “While my students would rather watch TV. America. America!” To think I can barely remember what we called MAGA and Cracker Hats in those days. I thought I chose not to talk about this. And that is what today is about. Choice. While pissing my life away, I remembered. Braxton, my son, you were the best choice I ever made. Yeah, like I didn’t catch you eating Waffles, or was it French Toast on the bed one morning? Of all the days, I knew you were my son. And you never left me.

No. I let you go.

Or I didn’t, which is why I’m sitting here crying. Sadness over everything, Little B.

Because you know what I can’t control. The reason I’ve been sick since, what, July? It’s FEAR! I am scared with every single breath I take, Braxton. I effing miss you, B! If you were behind me, eff everyone and everything that sought to do you any harm, my son.

There’s only one person I wish harm to today. Dangerous words from Virgil’s father. It’s why “I’m Still Standing.” It’s why you led me to your little brother, to Virgil. But I could say I was lazy too. And Virgil had some understanding of using the training pads, so that was less work, Braxton. Speaking of work… Money over everything!

Headlines? Drake? Eww! This morning I was busy “dreaming” of a Milf and no, not the woman I wanted as your stepmom, M Anime. No, it was Mama Butler/Alice Butler. Braxton, I don’t choose which pair of yabbos gets me going on any waking morning.

Honestly, you don’t want to hear about Alice or M Anime for that matter. Seriously.

Braxton, every choice I make is wrong. And the only option that’s left… Acquire currency.

But that’s not a choice to live. That’s a decision to stay alive. I don’t want one, and I have to do the other for you and little bro. It’s like a multiple choice test, and I guess and fail. And people keep telling me to stop choosing B. To stop choosing you. Other classes.

There are the yabbo sizes of M Anime, Alice, and @SeeJaneGoTV. And measuring my BBC?

Way wrong answer! But so is FEAR. I’ll choose Sadness for $500. If it only paid… B’s A Choice Virgil.

“Fear is not real. The only place that fear can exist is in our thoughts of the future. It is a product of our imagination, causing us to fear things that do not at present and may not ever exist. Do not misunderstand me, danger is very real, but fear is a choice”.
After Earth

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 067 ~That’ll B E-Day, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

THEY say that comedy comes in threes. And my existence would have been better as zero. Hell, isn’t that the score even at “Forty-One” Tomorrow? What about my two boys? I’m also thinking of two other puppies and ruining E-Day. That’ll B E-Day, Virgil.

Saturday, September 6, 2025

Journey 067 ~That’ll B E-Day, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Well, no. “Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow,” as Rick Grimes put it. How do I?

Am I still talking about E-Day? Three E-Days in particular. As you know, it’s not a day I want to remember. It’s a day that shouldn’t exist. And yet here I am bringing no joy.

Luna, it’s like I said on the 5th. No, I’m not pleading the 5th. I’m not a MAGA Cracker Hat.

I can prove it. On one particular E-Day, I bought myself a Fleshlight. A few of the sleeves, to be honest. There was also a type of interactive device that connected my “Strokin” to a porn video. And speaking of video, I also bought my first camera and discovered Exhibitionism. Don’t ask me where Braxton was; thankfully, he wasn’t around. I have no qualms about my body. Then M Anime…

Fortunately, I’m still friends with Braxton’s Favorite Girl. I haven’t spoken to M Anime in about two weeks, and she’s made the E-Day coming this Sunday particularly harder, Lady Lunalesca. Having the third-worst day of my existence, her breakup coincided with the second-worst day. My Emergence, my birth. I lost a friend, but I got one on E-Day, too. Balance.

Braxton’s Favorite Girl and I met at the movies, though we’d been talking forever. Nerve. For the record, I preferred the 2016 film “Nerve” to the actual novel. Anyway, we came back to the house, and yes, Braxton hated her at the time… Before she became his favorite. We watched “Secretary” from 2002 and Extreme Movie and ate reheated pizza. A rather decent E-Day, Lunalesca.

Then there was my Fortieth E-Day, where I made a ten-page gallery of me in my… for lack of a better term, “Birthday Suit.” (Cringes). Not at my body, but at that word Lady Luna. It was for way too much money, but I’m thinking of lowering it. Desperate times.

E-Day Fund

And to think, M Anime got to see it for free. So did B’s Fav Girl. And what about Cherry? She would kick my ass if I showed her my BBC. She’s British, which means she gets plenty of BBC across the pond. Eww. That was rude. What’s ruder is I’ll be Forty-One, Lady Lu.

B’s brother Virgil is eating well. But I won’t be seeing Cherry’s or M Anime’s Yabbos.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

That’ll B E-Day, Virgil.

1679 Days Without B III, Day 1120 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 065 ~A B Wish Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

“Do it for Braxton,” JSS (Just Survive Somehow). “I guess I die another day.” That’s what I told myself today. Sunday, “E-Day” is coming. I can’t go all Me Before You, Will Traynor. Hell, M Anime won’t be my, Lou Clark. My wish? No! “A B Wish Virgil”

Thursday, September 4, 2025

Journey 065 ~A B Wish Virgil~

1677 Days Without B III, Day 1118 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? This Wednesday, going into Thursday and E-Day, I’m going to try. Uh, try what exactly?

“Do good things, lunch boy.”
Dorian Newberry, Disturbing Behavior (1998)

“Dream. Try. Do good,”
Mr. Feeny, Boy Meets World (2000)

“We keep you alive to serve this ship. So row well, and live.”
Quintus Arrius

Come on, B, I had to throw 1959’s Ben-Hur into the mix. “Forty-One.” I keep hearing the drumbeat in my heart, Braxton. You have no idea how difficult it is to try to be nice.

To myself? Absolutely. So today I only want to be honest about “my” E-Day plans.

Today at the Day Job, I gave it a think, so here’s the plan. Always subject to change, B III.

Today, I want to give you an honest assessment of E-Day, Emergence, Existence, Extinction, Evolution, and Effing. Things I believe can get done. Friday will be why I hate E-Day with Lady Sophia. Saturday, I’ll explain the weirder ones to Lady Lunalesca. And Sunday (E-Day), I’ll give the Man in the Mirror my perfect day.

“It’s time to change the world kids! Here’s the blueprint.”
Dead Celebrity Status ― Messiah

(Today, I am awake. I am alive. I am not afraid. And I am happy.)

Not today, Braxton. In forty-one years of Existence, I have never believed that. However, we’re still talking about what’s real on E-Day. I don’t set any alarms and wake up whenever, ha-ha. I want to order breakfast, but I will end up making it. The only time I plan on leaving this house is for your little brother Virgil’s walk and food service. I won’t be writing, but I will be posting on that day. A day without ink is like a day without sunshine. Oh my Dear B III.

Your Dad hates to admit it, but I’d like to see M Anime, preferably without any clothes on. I know, I know, you don’t want to know that. It’s a pleasant thought. But she’s gone.

I’d like to order lunch from B-Dubs and a frosty strawberry milkshake. More Money? Getting expensive. I’ll carve a nice $150-$200. And that’s not all E-Day. I’d like to see The Long Walk on the 12th. And maybe some AirPods… I couldn’t BUY a woman even if I wanted to. Again, M Anime was my favorite. Your favorite girl won’t say a thing because she knows I hate E-Day, though I met her on one of the better ones. Cherry wouldn’t dare reveal her Yabbos.

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

Of course, I’ll take my customary nap and spend my usual writing time reading or watching movies. Dinner will feature the traditional Surf and Turf, including a Lobster Tail and a Medium-Rare Steak. Yum, yum.

Bobby: What if somebody wants theirs well-done?
Hank: We ask them politely, yet firmly, to leave.
King of the Hill

Baked Potato and French Fries? Potato for me, and I’m sure your brother won’t mind the fries and a slice of steak. The only thing I have to watch is Season 3 of “The Walking Dead: Daryl Dixon.” And after that… A reasonable night’s sleep? I need to ask your favorite girl about drink recommendations. Getting properly hammered for Existence?

The only way to survive it. All of this is a long shot, Braxton, but again for you, I’ll try. Ironic that I get to exist on E-Day because I make everything else… Well, cease to. A B Wish Virgil.

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad

Journey 060 ~Braxton and Virgil Clocked~

WillLeave a comment

This time last Saturday, life was beating me down, but I had the “love” of a “good” woman. Rico and Carmen. Time keeps on slipping into the future as Seal sang. T-minus eight days until E-Day. I hate Sundays. It’s Saturday. Braxton and Virgil Clocked

Saturday, August 30, 2025

Journey 060 ~Braxton and Virgil Clocked~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… “And it’s been awhile” as the song goes that I haven’t found something to complain about.

But I would never EVER take that out on my boys. And isn’t that why B III got his Lu?

Being so angry that I ignored him, I was INDIFFERENT. And when I recognized… Lunalesca, Braxton was all but gone. We’re talking Thursday through Saturday.

Lunalesca, Sunday was Braxton’s “great getting’ up mornin’” No, I’m not John Rawlins, aka Morgan Freeman from Glory. Though I’m sure Virgil is looking forward to his morning Glory. Uh, bathroom break. And that’s because I feel like the butt of a rifle has hit me after yesterday. That’s what bad writing, watching the wall, and realizing you’ve wasted your life does to you. I was literally sitting in the car, telling myself AHEM, Congratulations, you wasted your life “Forty-One.”

T-Minus eight days until E-Day. Have I ever told you how much I hate Sundays? And yes, I know what day it is. 1672 days ago, my son Braxton died on a Sunday. M Anime broke up with me last Sunday. This coming Sunday. Will I even be able to watch WWE’s Clash in Paris? And the Sunday after that is EFFING E-Day. Emergence, Existence, Extinction, and possible Evolution. And I did say my head hurt, didn’t I? Both heads.

Effing M Anime is still on the brain? In more ways than one. “I don’t know why I didn’t come.” Inside her? First off, Eww! Secondly, I’m not Norah Jones. And third, stop wasting time. What, on beating myself up? When will I be happy?

When the hands of the clock aren’t beating me down. When I can’t hear the incessant ticking. When I don’t take a look around and see the crumbling, cracking, and creepy crawlers. Not to mention the MAGA Cracker Hats. When I don’t count out food and tell myself to savor the TASTE, and all I get are toxins all over. And SMELL? I hate breathing.

As I hate the beat of my heart, the day of my birth, the loss of my Braxton. And boobies?

Copeus Cleavage, Titanic Tatas, Supersized Slobberknockers, Majestic Mammaries, Humongous Headlights, Milky Monsters, Behemoth Boobies, Colossal Contours, Gigantic Floppa Whoppers.
Yabbos.

I can’t hate Yabbos. Not even M Anime’s which I was thinking about this morning.

Lunalesca, when will I speak to her again? It’s been almost a week. Years, Lunalesca. Friendship destroyed in seconds. Tick Tock. Braxton and Virgil Clocked.

All of my life
Where have you been
I wonder if I’ll ever see you again
And if that day comes
I know we could win
I wonder if I’ll ever see you again

1672 Days Without B III, Day 1113 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 058 ~Virgil’s Good Sense B~

WillLeave a comment

If I had any sense at all, I would admit “All These Things That I’ve Done” to B’s Grandpa. To think I told him about M Anime. But his son is still a loser. And speaking of kids, sadly, it won’t be with M Anime. If only I had “Virgil’s Good Sense, B.”

Thursday, August 28, 2025

Journey 058 ~Virgil’s Good Sense B~

1670 Days Without B III, Day 1111 of Virgil’s Arrival

Just Me, Baby B,
Did you have a good day? Today is Monday, August 25, 2025, so you know how my day was. Humiliations Galore?

Around this time last week son, I was so worried about your potential… Nope, Braxton!

M Anime won’t be your stepmom. Do you remember when you and I had to have “The Talk?” You liked your Favorite Girl a little too much. I got two words for ya, “Red Rocket.”

Eww! Must your Dad be so gross today? At the moment your Daddy is out of tears, the toxins are still flowing, and toting your little brother Virgil around daily. But I don’t want to talk about why I’m still sitting at the Dining Room table. But three days, Braxton.

Honestly, I’m glad E-Day is still a ways off. But I’d also rather be with you. I know B III. Dangerous words, but there’s more.

It’s why I haven’t talked to M Anime yet. Hell! By the time you read this who knows. If you were here, I don’t think she would have gotten this far. You hated everybody, B.

Again, you had your Favorite Girl, your aunt, your grandma and even your grandpa. Uh.

Back to M Anime. Let’s pretend B that we’re sitting in bed and I’m finally explaining to you how my day was. How I wish we could go back to those days Braxton. Good days.

Anyway, “What do I tell you M Anime? The woman I was falling in love with woke up this morning to tell me it’s over. And why? Because she wants to have a family. Kids?”

Braxton, you didn’t have siblings.

Ahem… Virgil. I mean siblings, while you were bound to the mortal coil, Braxton. SIGH.

It didn’t make sense. You and I had each other, and that was enough. But for M, my B III. Why didn’t she say it? I get the sense that she’s lying. I’ve looked at myself in a mirror, B.

And there’s also all the cents that I’m missing in my bank account. But for M Anime. I think you would have liked her. I still do. If only I had you and Virgil’s good sense. You didn’t give your heart easily, and Virgil keeps his mouth shut. But me? I’ll never touch her, taste her, hear as she… Or smell her roses. And seeing her. Virgil’s Good Sense B

“It feels like I’m dying. I’m so scared all the time.” ― Mara, Spontaneous (2020)

Always and Forever,
Your Dad