Journey 221 ~Penniless Braxton And Virgil~

To be a preacher, a porn star, or both as a politician. I wouldn’t be penniless. But I chose the gift or curse of prose, poetry, and simple words on paper. “In God We Trust,” it says on the “Dollar, dollar bill, y’all.” “Penniless Braxton And Virgil”

Saturday, February 7, 2026

Journey 221 ~Penniless Braxton And Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… If only, SIGH. A penny for my thoughts? I’d say people aren’t that STUPID. But then…

MAGA, Nazis, and old pervy men. Hell! Men period. Like I told M Anime yesterday.

Last night, to be specific. My dearest Lunalesca, “Someday,” I may be doing that, doing her, in person. And I hope I’ll be able to say to you that “you were always there for me.”

Okay, enough of the “Sugar Ray” lyrics. One more thing I’ve been doing with my morning, Lady Lu. Music. I’m still paying for Spotify, Hulu, and the Internet in general!

A hundred dollars. I’m all out of patience, money, and I’m “All Out of Love.” Tell that to Braxton, Virgil, M Anime, and eff, the “Man In The Mirror.” So a penny for my thoughts.

“A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I’ll sell ’em for a dollar
They’re worth so much more after I’m a goner
And maybe then you’ll hear the words I’ve been singin’
Funny when you’re dead, how people start listenin’.”

“If I Die Young.” Forty-one jamming to The Band Perry.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Why? Well, I’m scared for one thing. And fear doesn’t pay. Adds, multiplies, and divides.

Am I talking about myself or MAGA? One more reason to hide inside. Well, as long as I have a place to hide, that is. How much did I spend last night? Every penny matters.

Ironically, pennies are gone thanks to MAGA. Is that irony? Or isn’t it “Ironic” as Alanis Morissette would sing? I have no clue, but it’s effing weird. I go for walks with both of my boys. Virgil on a leash and Braxton’s ashes around my neck. The woman of my dreams lives hundreds of miles away. While any woman close would rip off my balls.

I’m complaining I’m broke, but seeing Cherry’s yabbos. Um broker.

Indecent Proposal as it is. And what about my woman? What about Braxton’s Favorite Girl? Should I say Virgil’s, too? He only met her once. “I’ve seen Better Days,” Lunalesca.

That’s what my boys would say if they could talk to you. Another bit of irony. I think that I’ve talked to Braxton more when I put him in a box than when he was lying next to me, like his little brother is now. Or I watch the Olympics, which is based on promoting world peace in a country at war with its past, its people, and promotes hatred among everyone, everywhere. Effing MAGA. I’d rather see fictional fights (wrestling) than the stupid bowl.

But I’m spending what on food! Penniless Braxton And Virgil

1833 Days Without B III, Day 1274 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 214 ~Don’t Wake Braxton, Virgil~

B would give me a look. I remember his last look before life left his eyes. I couldn’t close them. He saw me, his Dad. I didn’t get much sleep the night before we left. You want… ever… single second. It’s been 5 years. Don’t Wake Braxton, Virgil

Saturday, January 31, 2026

Journey 214 ~Don’t Wake Braxton, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Enough to buy my son’s life from the Grim Reaper, God, and a good night’s sleep?

Not tonight. Five years ago on this very night… Well, it’s morning now, but let’s start with Saturday, January 30, 2021. I was rushing between my son Braxton on the bed and his water bowl on the floor right next to him. Will you look at that, first tears, Lunalesca.

There’ll be plenty of those today, tomorrow, whenever. Anyway, my B was so strong, Lu.

He couldn’t stand me worrying, so he tried jumping out of bed, and I ended up sleeping in his room so he could be by the bowl he insisted on walking to, every single time.

Lunalesca, it was one of his last acts of defiance against death. Of all the bedtime stories I told my son… He’s going to die…

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Nope! As far as I was concerned, he was going to live forever. Forever and always. My son, Braxton Barks Bradford, was/is invincible, immortal, and insane for loving me, Lu.

The father who failed him. Is this really how I wish to honor my boy? Last year, I wrote his story. Hell! I’ve penned two full-blown novels. One’s out, ha. The other? Book or son?

Virgil? Why is his Dad up at midnight chugging back energy drinks and writing about his dead brother? Other than missing him, being mad at the world, and trying to avoid the flat surface, which is the mattress. Eff Lunalesca! You know why I’m abstaining.

Braxton would think I need the love tonight. Not mourning a dead puppy. And Virgil?

He’s alive and well. 5 years old on the 5th anniversary of Braxton’s passing and 5 months without M Anime, though we “connected” earlier this week. To Forgive. To Accept.

Virgil as my son, my second-born? I’m trying, I swear. Called him B this afternoon…

Welcoming M Anime back into my universe. If I could, then I would. I’ll go “Wherever You Will Go.” Things you can say about your dog/son but not your Ex-Girlfriend?

Lunalesca, for now. I may accept us someday. But Braxton being gone? Again, never ever!

I refuse to accept that. So I will do as always. Cry. A burger and fries in the afternoon, Lu. BBQ for dinner. Movies. May my son Braxton Barks Bradford RIP. Don’t Wake Braxton, Virgil

1826 Days Without B III, Day 1267 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will