Tag: Failure

Journey 248 ~B Cause There’s V~

WillLeave a comment

One book I was never able to finish was the Bible. Sure, I’ve read a few books within it. But never cover to cover. Now I’m finding myself reading things I don’t wanna: pet loss, effing mail, my stupidity. Yet I keep writing. “B Cause There’s V”

Friday, March 6, 2026

Journey 248 ~B Cause There’s V~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Because Virgil is here. Isn’t that the same thing I’ve always told his big brother, Braxton?

“I Have A Song.” I have a story… Most days, I feel like Charles Bukowski is speaking directly to me as I listen to “So You Wanna Be A Writer.” I’d rather be Johnny Sins.

Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, M Anime is good for the ego, Bless Her Heart.

But my body and I have an “It’s complicated” type of relationship. And my brain is even worse. And yet which one do I listen to? As Matchbox Twenty sings, “I feel stupid.” Uh, effing duh? But you’re expecting a story, my Lady. The Day Job’s summary for you, Soph.

I was playing DJ at the Day Job and decided to play the song “Watch World War Three (on Pay TV).” Effing MAGA! Effing war!

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Now, if only reading about that and other Humiliations Galore could be as easily forgotten as “Remember Me: Understanding the Stages of Grief and Remembrance From the Loss of a Pet.” I’ve got nothing against Reese Taryn. If anything, I’ve been so tired, and I’m not absorbing any of the words. Or I have absorbed far too many with Braxton.

I mean, as far as the full story of my grieving coming to an end with Braxton. There is no The End. Later on? See ya later? Or as I told him every time I left the house, Love you, B, Love you, Braxton. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve tripped over the letters and numbers B III and 2-V—my two boys.

And the three stories that I can’t allow myself to forget because I haven’t even started to write them. How do I expect to make any money…? With what I did at the Day Job.

Honestly! A HUMAN fighting ring. The “Inferno Circuit.” It is run by a three-dog criminal empire known as the Cerberus Syndicate. Heroes: Braxton, Virgil, Myself…

Secondly, there was the Dying Light Rip-Off. M Amine’s nightmares. The three characters that “ravage” her, and the demon that can’t take her. Strength. Submission.

Finally, there is stealing from The Running Man. Huntresses hunting a man and fur buddies. Plenty of ladies along the way. But Virgil and M Anime, they are what matters.

Writing. What good does it do? B Cause There’s V…

1860 Days Without B III, Day 1301 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 243 ~Braxton, Virgil On E~

WillLeave a comment

Some days there’s nothing left. I’m empty. The fridge. Another bag of dog food. My bank account. What book am I reading next? My book sales. The bed that I’m not in. The beat goes on. I hope Braxton is eating, wherever. And V? “Braxton, Virgil On E.”

Sunday, March 1, 2026

Journey 243 ~Braxton, Virgil On E~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And before I get to kicking your ass, let me say this. Don’t go cursing your boys?

Their bellies are full, so are their beds, and they’re damn near boy crazy like a couple of gossipy girls. Hey! What did I say? Why are you being such a meanie today? Life Sucks!

Ah, yes, the “Battlecry” of an angsty teen. Back when Nujabes and “Samurai Champloo” were life. When you believed you still had a chance at a life. Honestly, your existence…

And yes, I know you’ve only been awake for a few hours. Last week was my bad, my failure, and my disgrace. And I didn’t want you to see the mess I made, so… No! I didn’t go that far, but considering one of the first things you did today involved the last slices of bread. Not Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Hometown Heat Wave, Chase Jannock
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 001 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am
    Failed

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Yeah, you haven’t gotten yours yet. Empty? Well, less than empty. Nation 01? More like Negative 01, since yes, you’ve already failed number 06 by waking up full of… plenty.

Let us begin with something STUPID. Yesterday, that game, Whiteout Survival. You’re more full of failure and guilt over an app than MAGA shows toward the living. You emptied your city to fill graves—an empty vault. You filled an armory, but there are no hands left to wield swords. What good is it to fill a throne with an empty heart, I ask, hmm.

And yes, it’s an effed up game, and you at least have the good sense to feel bad. Man, FDT!

How about eff AI too? You create Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING I Have No Clue Whatsoever
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 001 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am

And every week you fill it with failure. It’s empty rhetoric. More so today, tomorrow…

Always and forever, your heart is broken. And unlike some STUPID mobile game, your heart isn’t empty. You keep having to refill it, and speaking of which, Virgil’s food bowl, rather Braxton’s food bowl. You couldn’t even get Virgil his own things. Well, I couldn’t anyway, and especially not now. But food, yes. What about yourself? Again, I effed up.

I didn’t want stars in my eyes last night. Headlights most likely? And while you’re thinking about more ways to be broke, optometrist, bug people, sanitation workers, and if M Anime should COME… You’ll fill her up—siblings for the boys. But you’re full of crap. Braxton, Virgil On E

1855 Days Without B III, Day 1296 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 242 ~Almost A B, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

The theme for today is “Move B***H, get out the way.” There are stronger fighters than me. Better dog walkers. Better kids… My sister pays for her own crap, like a house. And me? The last time I was almost somebody was in the womb. Almost A B, Virgil

Saturday, February 28, 2026

Journey 242 ~Almost A B, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Almost. I’m only about $999,998,000 short. Speaking of short, I’m almost 6’ by way of 5’5”.

Yeah, that might matter to a girl like Leoshi “‘Cause she don’t know me, but yo, she’s really fine.” And what about “Moesha”? Speaking of pop culture, I can’t stand, my Olds watched it religiously—prime black television. But I despised Moesha and Frank Mitchell.

What a way to end another Black History Month, almost. Talking about Black people I don’t like. You would think I was turning MAGA, almost. But no. People hating people.

I wouldn’t say no to Michelle Obama. I enjoy watching Jasmine Crockett kick ass—Jahara Jayde (Homer drool). There was a time I was crazy for Misty Stone. Uh, Jenna Fox, when she was the college tutor. And here I thought I was going to speak somewhat righteously, Lunalesca. Almost.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

I’m getting tired of Almost like Braxton’s book “My Turn To B III” got tired of the words “Of Course.” And as Moesha/Brandy sings “Almost Doesn’t Count.” I’m always almost.

STUPID, I’m sure, but take this morning as an example: Whiteout Survival, State vs State fight. I position my city, and I’m quickly told to get to the back of the line. Why is that?

“Am I hard enough?
Am I rough enough?
Am I rich enough?
I’m not too blind to see.”
Beast of Burden by The Rolling Stones

“Higher, further, faster, baby,”
Carol Danvers, from Captain Marvel (2019)

And sadly, I know I’m not, I can’t be any of these things. Is that the right word, Lu, sadly?

Up until five minutes ago. “And then THEY call. And I remember.” My Olds, Lunalesca.

Then skin and bones, sickly, and yes, my dear, STUPID, all come to mind. I’m almost a man. “Human” and “Ordinary Human.” Their bum son.

Now you see why I hate my phone… Almost. Braxton despised the tiny glowing tech. “The Glow Box” in Braxton speak. But then there’s his potential stepmom M Anime, his Favorite Girl, and Cherry’s big Yabbos but even bigger brain. And me a B student? Lunalesca, I’d better be talking about Braxton because I sucked at Higher Learning. Oh B.

One bad playthrough, phone call, and playing the perverter of prose, and my day’s effed.

But I saved M Anime’s, almost. Do I love her like pancakes? Nah, that’s Braxton. However, thinking about some idiot game, the worst president in “my lifetime,” my Olds, and pretty much 99% of the human population. I can’t be almost! Not to her. Virgil. Braxton… Almost A B, Virgil

1854 Days Without B III, Day 1295 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 241 ~Hello Braxton, Hail Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

Aw Hell B, Aw Hail V. How many times has V seen hail? And B… Am I forgetting him? According to my therapist, aka AI, my own descent shows that I’m coming “Down To Earth.” But to quote a Cracker Hat, “I don’t want reality.” Hello Braxton, Hail Virgil.

Friday, February 27, 2026

Journey 241 ~Hello Braxton, Hail Virgil~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Hometown Heat Wave? I’ll finish reading that tomorrow. Whiteout Survival? SVS: A war story. My books…

We’ll get to that, to them… I say that every day, don’t I? But I have this thing about needing to eat and all. I don’t have enough hours… I know Sophia, I hear them too—an effing cadre of motivational speakers. I don’t have enough hands… Writing and jerking.

That leads me to excuse number three. As Smash Mouth sings it, “Can’t Get Enough Of You Baby.” My baby being, M Anime. B III and Virgil’s potential stepmom. She’s…

Honestly? Hot as Hell! Well, of course, but there’s so much more to her, like a song I’m starting to think I dreamt up. Or a perverted movie plot. I swear I’ve been thinking about it since talking to M. The woman has my attention.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

But the books, all the books, Sophia! My ideas, Journey 234 ~Braxton and Virgil Bounce~

First, there was the story of the two Chihuahua pups and their human fighter-father as they try to escape the underground HUMAN fighting ring, the “Inferno Circuit.” It is run by a three-dog criminal empire known as the Cerberus Syndicate. Seriously? Am I for real?

Next was M Amine’s nightmares, the three characters that “ravage” her, and the demon that can’t take her. So what if the human and genetically created characters by using her body “sexually” somehow gave her the strength to beat the demon and save the world…

Dying Light series… Lastly, “The Running Man…”. Huntresses? Black Orchid Division, the Crimson Requiem (nuns with red habits). Inferno Cadre.

But what about my life story? Exist. Oh, the last thing I want to do is speak on the weather.

My daddy said when a man come talking about the weather, keep yo hand on your wallet.
― Life (1999)

Hail. That’s a funny story about my Virgil. Okay, it will be someday, with how scared he was. Do I have any funny stories about B III and the weather? My boys hate the rain.

Sophia, I remember when I thought, “What if the Town Blew Away?” Daria, pop culture.

Anyway, I grabbed Braxton’s “resting place” and between his box and my pendant… I just wanted my boy by my side. Virgil wasn’t here yet. I’m not that cruel but then M Anime turns me to a “Savage,” like Whethan meets Tillie Cole’s “Sick Fux.” Read Grocery list, finances, SVS reports… Hello Braxton, Hail Virgil

1853 Days Without B III, Day 1294 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 236 ~Braxton, Virgil, Go Bananas~

WillLeave a comment

Planet of the Apes? Well, I’ve never had an ape before, but I trust B and V. A chicken in every pot and a paw in every ass, well, anyone threatening me. You know, people who would call me a monkey, I’m worried about money. Braxton, Virgil, Go Bananas

Sunday, February 22, 2026

Journey 236 ~Braxton, Virgil, Go Bananas~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… The keyword there is MAN. Before I eff you over… AHEM. Eff MAGA, FDT, Eff “The Five.”

Well, minus Jessica Tarlov. You’d eff her even though she works for FOX. You’d eff Lauren Boebert, Kayleigh McEnany, and Ivanka Trump too. And let’s not forget Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez. Eff dude, why can’t you keep it in your pants? Seriously!

However, last night, “Sorry, Blame It On Me.” The things that drive me nuts… Bananas?

Oh, you’re a “Hollaback Girl.” No, you’re a loser, a loser with a skinny wiener. Okay, that was below the belt (snickers), and I’m sorry. But again, last night, I was “Delirious Outta My Mind.” “Where Is My Mind?” Well, yours now. Better question. Where are your boys? Braxton is still in a box, the Rainbow Bridge, or beside you. Virgil’s on his pillow as I’ve failed Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING A Life Together: A Slice of Life Contemporary Harem (3)
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 002 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 000 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am
    Failed

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Your only saving “grace” is that while you believe the world would be better off if you joined B, the rest of humanity isn’t much better. Give the world to the apes or the dogs.

If we start in on dogs, you’ll be sitting here crying all day. But last night I dreamt of apes.

Once again, FDT for his ape video of President Obama and Michelle. But men in general are animals. BEAST! At least that’s what M Anime is showing. And the fact that you have somehow “evolved” in her eyes… It’s one of the reasons you care for her so effing much.

Honestly, you would rather have her eff you than me. Well, you are a “Sexy Mothereffer” failing Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING I Have No Clue Whatsoever
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am

You know you should leave that to the non-failures like Prince or Labrinth. Because if we’re talking sexy, there was a pretty blonde gymnast, there’s Cherry, and then the dream of M Anime, now wearing a yellow kimono with silver feathers. What will AI say?

So you’re thinking about peeling her out of it, but you SHOULD worry. “How Bizarre.”

A woman wants that banana in your pants, and you’re sitting here struggling to buy a snack. All you wanted was a bacon cheeseburger. Though she asks you eat healthy.

There’s always the speaker at the Day Job. You must be driving those people bananas.

You’re playing “Whiteout Survival” to be in last place. “The world, Chico, and everything in it.” Braxton, Virgil, Go Bananas

1848 Days Without B III, Day 1289 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 235 ~Braxton And Virgil Tops~

WillLeave a comment

It’s not a headache. It’s not B’s furry butt telling me he needs to potty. It’s not even when my tablet fell and cracked my glasses. I still have eyes… But I feel like my head on my shoulders is too much. Me? My boys? Well, “Braxton And Virgil Tops.”

Saturday, February 21, 2026

Journey 235 ~Braxton And Virgil Tops~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… And you know I’m lying. A bad night’s sleep will do that—bad dreams, aka nightmares.

My own? Yeah, because if we were talking about Braxton and Virgil’s potential stepmom, I’d be hard as an effing rock. M Anime’s dreams turn me on. She and General Xu, Boss, and Associate. And two of my biggest fantasies at the moment. Cuckoldry, Ravishment.

Dreams? The only thing I remember about my dream last night was beating the crap out of some blonde frat boy like I was Will Hunting in “Good Will Hunting.” I had to take it out on somebody. That’s not good to say, considering I am a father. Wanna-be Husband:

“All these girls only gonna want one thing
I could spend my whole life good will hunting
Only good gon’ come is as good when I’m cumming”
Run This Town

Not just yet. Remember December? And now, the mid- to late week of June. Summer Vacation? Where to go, Lady Lunalesca? To the stars. Heaven. Take me to bed, Will.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

If a girl ever says those five words to me, I’m putty in her hands. I swear to Braxton, Lu:

In my hands, nothing turns to putty
― Michelle Huddleson

“Somewhere Only We Know.” “In My Place.” SIGH “Just one year and then you’d be happy.” That’s what Gerry Rafferty is singing about. In bed with my Boricua or on “Baker Street?” Speaking of the street, did I forget that I have a major cash issue to deal with, Lu?

Hell, I didn’t remember to go to bed until midnight. I woke up hunched over on this same love seat. And you wonder why I felt the need to bash someone’s head in. “In Dreams.”

Or maybe I was trying to wake myself up. “I’m Black, Y’all” and still ain’t MAGA. Eff them and FDT!

Um, the American Dream? Ok, I wish I could go all Christopher Stone, Freedom Fighters:

“New Yorkers, fellow Americans… I am Chris Stone, the so-called “Freedom Phantom”. I stand before you today a free man, and I vow to die a free man. Like you, my world was shattered eight long months ago. I watched as my family and friends were tortured, captured, and killed. I have nothing left of my former life… except the hope for a better future… a better future for our children – the American dream! I, for one, still believe in that dream. We’ve read this in our schoolbooks as children; now is the time for us to embrace those ideals and stand up against the weight of Tyranny. We have a duty to ourselves to throw off our oppressors. When I look around this city, I do not see smoldering ruins… no, instead I see a sleeping army, ready to awaken. The world is watching us now… how we respond will prove our claim. I stand before you and the world today to reaffirm the pledge our forefathers made to each other, and for each of us, to protect our lives, our fortunes, and our self-worth. So I ask you now to take up arms against the evil invaders and yell in their faces that.
THEY WILL NEVER TAKE OUR
FREEDOM!”
― Freedom Fighters

But, Hell, Lunalesca, what did I do for Valentine’s Day, Black History Month, Braxton’s Birthday? I haven’t even watched the Olympics. And didn’t I say I would look up some Black Haremlit authors? Damn, am I not a Black Erotic Author? Perv with a blog.

Worse. I’m a forty-one-year-old bum sitting on a loveseat playing Whiteout Survival, which is the thought that had me zoned out last night and waking up the way I did.

Lunalesca, I love my boys. Braxton and Virgil are tops. My four-legged sons. But crap:

“And maybe I forgot
All things I miss
Oh, somehow I know
There’s more to life than this.”
Kid Rock

Lunalesca, I want that white-picket fence, wife, family, that New York Times bestseller, my “adult studio. Braxton And Virgil Tops

1847 Days Without B III, Day 1288 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 234 ~Braxton and Virgil Bounce~

WillLeave a comment

It’s been one week since he looked at me. More like five years… Six? Anyway, Braxton bounced. And how many stories have I read to his brother Virgil? How many have I written saying they would save us? Three new ideas, but “Braxton and Virgil Bounce.”

Friday, February 20, 2026

Journey 234 ~Braxton and Virgil Bounce~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… No. Allow me to take a page from MAGA and provide the concepts of a story.

The first idea came yesterday. Do you know the painting “Dogs Playing Poker” by Cassius Marcellus Coolidge? Oh, maybe it’s these Living Single reactions. Maybe the fact that (I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction. Maybe it’s the Def Jam motif, you know. Or maybe the sexy M Anime-like figure in the kimono. That was an accident, but she’s so “Sexy” Sophia.

I mean, as Peter Cinocotti sings about. Or Tom Jones, she’s an effing Sexbomb. Anyway!

Two Chihuahuas… My furry sons, Braxton and Virgil. Their Dad (Yours Truly) is in an underground HUMAN fighting ring known as the Inferno Circuit. These two furry brothers are trying to save me with M Anime’s help from a three-dog criminal empire known as the Cerberus Syndicate. Any thoughts? Suggestions?

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Before that, there’s an idea M Anime and I were talking about with her dreaming. My Spanish goddess… Trust me, “All I wanted was to see her naked” once upon a time. Now we’re back to talking about having kids. And she could be B III and 2-V’s stepmom, someday.

Anyway, the idea! Okay, so she tells me about the three characters that “ravage” her. However, there is a demon that can’t take her. So what if the human and genetically created characters by using her body “sexually” somehow gave her the strength to beat the demon and save the world… It reminds me a tad of the third “Dying Light” game. If you defeat the beast, you get enhanced abilities… That’s lots of games.

But my third idea is even more of a rip-off. Simply put, “The Running Man” but with female hunters. Huntresses? I’m still ticked off about losing all those elements, like the Black Orchid Division, the Crimson Requiem (nuns with red habits), and the Inferno Cadre.

Sophia, I could have built a whole damn world out of those groups alone. Something like World War Z. The movie is okay if you have no idea about the book. But because I read the book, the movie starring Brad Pitt was a dumpster fire. And “The Running Man.”

Yeah, Sophia, I should probably read. Anything I can read to my kids, but no. My bank account, Hometown Heat Wave, and Backward Beauty (Fuu’s Painting). Braxton and Virgil Bounce.

1846 Days Without B III, Day 1287 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 229 ~Virgil, During Braxton’s Age~

WillLeave a comment

You know how I’ve felt since birth, 7, 13, every day of high school, dropping out of college, the day B died, becoming V’s Dad, breaking up with M, forgiveness, “And The Beat Goes On.” And “I’m Getting Too For This Shit.” Virgil, During Braxton’s Age

Sunday, February 15, 2026

Journey 229 ~Virgil, During Braxton’s Age~

To Will:
It’s the Man In The Mirror… And for the record, you need to shave. Looking raggedy, Old Man. If only Braxton were here…

(You’re) Timeless To Me… To him, you were. And your boy never aged a day until he was lying in his bed at the vet’s, doing his best Joel Miller impression. You cried like Ellie.

So I guess you don’t look that bad. And we’re talking about nineteen-year-old Ellie. You are not MAGA, those gross effers. So concerned with turning back the clock to white supremacy, sickness (measles, bubonic plague, and whatever I caught), and we cannot forget slavery. You hear that effing MAGA, Cracker Hats, and always FDT. Seriously!

However, did we end up on this subject? You’re forty-one, watching the “Days Go By.” Honestly, it’s written all over your face. It’s why we only have these chats on Sundays. Failures! Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING Pledged To Him 9: An Unconventional Romance – Neil Bimbeau
    Completed
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
    Failed
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
    Failed
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 000 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
    Failed (Day 002 No Fap)
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
    Failed
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am
    Failed

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

Should you add owning a harem to the list since you cited a nineteen-year-old? Eww!

Too many harem romances with college girls, magic glasses, demon chicks, and night elves, etc. And now you’ve been… Okay, more like I’ve been all into The Three Musketeers and The Man In The Iron Mask. French? And isn’t it Black History Month here in America? Not according to MAGA, but let’s not go there again. There is M Anime.

Thirty-Seven. Are you the man who can build a Heaven for her, or at least a Hell to share, ha-ha? You remember being, what, a teen, looking your thirty-six-year-old Old Man in the face and thinking him old. Where did your time go? Father of two, failing Six Impossible Things:

  1. I WILL BE VIEWING I Have No Clue Whatsoever
  2. I WILL BE VETTING Pictures, My Braxton’s Life Story
  3. I WILL BE VENDING Gulp: Poetry Book
  4. I WILL BE VOWING To Keep Pants On (Day 002 No Fap). Real Girls Are An Exception
  5. I WILL BE VALUING My Flesh Getting A Tattoo Of My Son Little B III
  6. I WILL BE VALIANT, Being The Man My SONS Think I Am

What do you have to show for it? Hell! You’ve only arrived. What have I given you as a foundation? Man Up? First off, I shouldn’t say things like that to you. My apologies, dude.

But secondly, what do you have other than a plethora of random Pop Culture knowledge?

Sticky Fingaz’s Man Up? SIGH. You can find the owner of a certain pair of yabbos in less than fifteen minutes. But M Anime’s are a personal favorite; only you and medical professionals have seen them. And speaking of medical professionals, are you going to get your eyes checked? At least you don’t have to pay for it. Not with money but with time? And how will Virgil see six? Money! Virgil, During Braxton’s Age

1841 Days Without B III, Day 1282 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 228 ~80’s A B, Virgil~

WillLeave a comment

An 80 is a B. Cs get degrees. And I was praying for a D on paper when I was done playing with the one in my pants. I have been out of school a long time. But my woman is teaching me about Chinese Myths and Naughty Spanish. Hot? 80’s A B, Virgil.

Saturday, February 14, 2026

Journey 228 ~80’s A B, Virgil~

Hey, Lady Lu,
I am a Billionaire right now… Not if I’m not a mediocre white man who dares to call himself the president. Hmm.

Not that I can talk, my dear Lady Lunalesca. I’m the one who’s looking up, do dogs’ tongues burn on ChatGPT? All I know is Braxton stuck his tongue into a cup of hot chocolate and winced. And then he had the nerve to look at me as if I had done something wrong. Well I kil.. had him euthanized several years later. I did. 100% I believe it, Luna.

13 days shy of his 16th birthday. What a lovely way to say I love you. Braxton and I had a good life. “Him and I.” He was my little sister’s dog. And then I go and spoil it all by saying “Something Stupid,” like I love you to him. And then he’s my dog.

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

My son. And how did I honor him yesterday? As a matter of fact, how did I honor his little brother, Virgil? The “Tango Maureen?” The Tango Virgil. Hell! The Tango M Anime for “real…” with no regrets. Have I ever told you how hot M Anime is? I’ve got a thing for Puerto Rican girls now. Well, one particular Puerto Rican woman and one thing. But if tentacle porn ever becomes real… Anyway, what was I saying? I spent most of Braxton’s birthday… Doing things with M Anime, I should be doing today. How much did I spend last Valentine’s Day? Total? Why am I not doing that now? Is this an 80’s hit?

No, it was 1990, “The King of Wishful Thinking,” Lunalesca.

My breakup theme for her in August. Then January rolled around, and it seems (Every Time I Turn Around) Back in Love Again.” M Anime and I aren’t quite there yet. Um, she’s sure she’s in love. But I’m the guy who has been mourning his dead furry kid forever.

Is five years forever? Come talk to me on October 20th, 2026, and if Virgil is still “Safe And Sound.” Suppose everything hasn’t burned thanks to MAGA. I’m quite comfortable at 80 degrees. If I were truly in love with M Anime, I’d be playing 98 Degrees’ “I Will Still Love You.” Suppose I were a better man, Lunalesca. But I’m living on 80 bucks. Not enough for “Love and Happiness.” 80’s A B, Virgil.

1840 Days Without B III, Day 1281 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will

Journey 227 ~Braxton’s Birthday Volume V~

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B’s twenty-one… Happy Birthday! If only you were here to see it. Speaking of seeing, um, my girl is very horny. And it’s Friday the 13th. Let’s just say she’s trying to raise the dead. I’m trying to get well. And celebrate Braxton’s Birthday Volume V

Friday, February 13, 2026

Journey 227 ~Braxton’s Birthday Volume V~

Hey, Lady Sophia,
Let me tell you a story… Well, three maybe. Comedy comes in threes, or so they say. I don’t do comedy necessarily.

I don’t buy joke books. Jerk chicken? That would require a cookbook. Books on justice? The Constitution? I should get a printed copy before the Cracker Hats change it. Yeah!

What doesn’t change is the love I have for my sons. But today is Braxton Barks Bradford’s 21st Birthday. Welcome to Level 21. Does it still count if he’s on the Rainbow Bridge? How dare I? Considering how sick I’ve been, I’ll be driving up the Rainbow Road pretty soon.

(Cue Mario Kart Rainbow Road Theme). Any version? I doubt Braxton’s idea of Heaven would be a car ride. I can’t say Virgil Vivi’s would be either. 2-V aka V aka Five. My youngest son. But we’re here to remember Braxton, are we not? Pancake:

“Pinch me, pinch me
‘Cause I’m still asleep
Please, God, tell me
That I’m still asleep.”
Barenaked Ladies ‧ 2000

It was the morning after Braxton’s First Walk. I sat on the bed with a plate of waffles. Or was it French Toast? Anyway, I left to get a drink. Not two minutes later, this ball of fluff, who wasn’t a year old, had jumped on the bed and nearly drowned in syrup and crumbs.

So the next day I had pancakes, and I placed them up high. My Ma says, “You must love pancakes.” And there you have it. I would tell Braxton, “I love you like pancakes,” meaning I placed him above everything. Of course, there’s the “I didn’t pour the BISQUICK, but you’re my pancake.” The Walking Dead… Look it up. Then there was the way he curled up in my lap.

Not much of a story, huh? Here’s another: On one of his birthdays, his Favorite Girl made him a cake with meat, potatoes, beans, cheese, and treats. We watched the first season of the reality show “Solitary,” Episode 3, “To Eat or Not to Eat” to be specific. And why?

Sophia, up to that very day, I had never seen Braxton give up on “people food.” It was blasphemy. Not that he didn’t enjoy it. But “For the First Time in Forever,” his eyes were bigger than his stomach, and he tapped out. Braxton only surrendered to food once more.

It’s why he didn’t see 16-21. He stopped eating. Here I am at 41, not eating. So uh Happy Birthday Braxton… Braxton’s Birthday Volume V

1839 Days Without B III, Day 1280 of Virgil’s Arrival

B.L.M. Braxton’s Life Matters,
Will